Advice for dating women that are BPD, traumatized, damaged, and victims of abuse?

>>33248528 (OP)
dont take anything they do personally, enjoy the good parts, internally laugh when theyre flipping out. just dont get attached basically. crazy woman sex is fun

>>33248528 (OP)
you don't. they need to improve on their own, preferably with DBT

>>33248528 (OP)
The push and pull dynamic will fuck you up. They'll leave you once you care too much. Just don't. Find someone who cares about you.

>>33248528 (OP)
ALWAYS wear a condom

Know how to torture people professionally so you can spot when other people do it to her

>>33248528 (OP)
Yeah, easy: don't. They can be a good fuck but trust me, it's never worth it to stick around.

>>33248604
>They'll leave you once you care too much.

This. Loving a BPD terrifies the shit out of them. I don't mean just romancing and basic dating shit, actually choosing to love them for what they are, darkness and all. They start emotionally glitching out and will start sabotaging everything left and right in a bid to try and prove to themselves that you are 'just like the rest'. If you hold strong and don't budge and keep choosing to love them, even when they hurt you, they end up panicking and running away.

>>33248528 (OP)
Yes. Don't

As someone that has been dating an actually diagnosed BPD girl for nearly 4 years, just never take anything they say too seriously. It takes some getting used to but you’ll figure it out, and there are times where their words will still get to you, whether negatively or positively. Just try to minimize that as much as possible. BPD is a spectrum. From some of the girl I’ve seen, particularly my gf, she doesn’t flip flop between psychotic and normal, she just has a “voice” in the back of her head telling her to abandon everything and run away. Pretty manageable stuff and most women are cowards anyways so it’s not much of a thing to worry about

>>33248528 (OP)
i wouldn’t date a bpd woman i knew 2 and they committed suicide, they are really unstable…

my mom had bpd, i cant deal with that bullshit anymore. i hope best for bpd ppl tho

>>33248528 (OP)
Don’t. They use their emotional sensitivity for evil, evil shit.

>>33250348
Yeah, it's fucking crazy. And they'll keep pursuing abusive people too. It's fucking insane. Sad as fuck.

>>33248528 (OP)
>Advice for dating women that are BPD, traumatized, damaged, and victims of abuse?
don't
sex is good but you can get good sex from many other sources, unless you're commited to help them (and you're not, be honest) they're more of a hassle than it's ever worth
t. dated a bpd, wish I got every single day with her back except the days we did anal.

>>33248528 (OP)
train her like an animal using positive and negative reinforcement
every time she shows the good crazy, reward her with affection, presents, food and compliments
every time she behaves bad you whip her, jail her, pretend you're about to kill her

show her you're 100 timers crazier than she could ever hope to be

Am one. Don’t think it’s worth it to date traumatized women (or men desu) unless you’ve had an extremely long relationship throughout your lives. Like childhood friends or neighbors.

Not because traumatized people are unlovable, far from it. But that shit breaks you down, often causes lifelong anger issues, performance issues, commitment issues. Bad relationship material.

Not impossible to get better though.

>>33248528 (OP)
Speaking as someone who spent 6 years with one and just broke up for good earlier this year? Don't.

Seriously man, just don't. It isn't worth it. They will make your life chaos, they will suck you into their messed up internal world. You will have to be her emotional shock absorber for when she's spiraling and suicidal. She can't support you emotionally at all, but will need you there for her 24/7. And the push/pull dynamic is brutal. You will get addicted to her intense love, but then she will feel engulfed and push you away, maybe even breaking up with you. Then stays away because she feels guilty and hates herself for having done what she did to you, but that just makes them keep doing it to avoid the guilt. Then once your withdrawal is over and you're fine again, they'll notice they aren't being "pressured" and come back to you. It's a cycle that will leave you tortured and broken. Just don't engage, man. She needs to work on herself. I tried to fix mine but it didn't work and I just broke myself. Not worth it, man. Please stay away from her, please. I'm telling you this like I'd tell my past self if I went back in time.

>>33248604
nigga shut the fuck up

>>33252600
shut up nigga ur saying dis like its every female w bpd dat acts wrong n half of the time its just whores that wna be bpd n act stupid as fuck like u dont know shit brah ur bitch was a poser

>>33248528 (OP)
Honestly, don't! I got into my first ever relationship (at 30) with a damaged women, our chemistry was perfect, we shared esoteric interest, she accepted me despite my eccentricity. I only treated her with the utmost respect, our last date was the best ever and she returned the intimacy I gave her, the next day she messaged me saying she's not ready for a relationship, I messaged back asking for an explenation wondering what I could've possibly done wrong, she told me I did nothing wrong and that she genuinely loved me but couldn't commit to a relationship because of how she's been hurt in the past, I asked her to put her trust in me but she never replied.

It felt like finding a one in a billion women and then losing her almost immediately.
Long story short; don't date a damaged women, it'll only lead to crippling heartache. I've wanted to kill myself every day since, the only thing that stops me is the hurt I'll invoke on those who love me.

Either don't or be very emotionally stable and self sufficient yourself.
Like how therapists can immerse themselves into the fucked up shit of their patients, be there for them and have a meaningful relationship with them, but it doesn't fuck them up in a significant way.

>>33248528 (OP)

Don't do it lad, you'll regret it and possibly ruin your life.

>>33250859
>they committed suicide
Well, you don't have to worry about how to break up with them in the best way.

>>33248528 (OP)
Easy: you don't.

>>33250348
This nigga knows.

>>33250348
>loving a BPD terrifies the shit out of them

Why?

>>33253593
That doesn't sound like BPD, sounds like she didn't really like you enough for a real relationship

>>33250348
Exactly this, I can tell you've had first hand experience. It's fucking tragic and painful.

>>33254315
Honestly she did, she poured her heart open to me (after the breakup) and told me about her traumatic past relationships and said she couldn't commit to me for fear of losing me and being screwed over again like every other man before me has.
Trust issues are serious shit. Our breakup would've been much easier if she just ghosted me because I could've just thought "oh she just didn't like me", but to know that she genuinely liked me for me yet couldn't place her trust in me, that is the most crippling feeling I've ever experienced, and I have been through some shit in life.

I fit all of those descriptions. Here is how my boyfriend takes care of me
>listens to me vent without judging
>accepts my apologies after meltdowns and trauma flashbacks
>doesn't try to force me to do stuff I don't want to
>acts normal towards me after I was upset and is always calm and mature
>encourages me and has firm boundaries, won't be manipulated or bullied but wants me to be healthy and succeed
He has helped me a lot my trauma isn't as bad after a year together and I don't get mad and have meltdowns as much. I still do but they go away faster without the shame others would make me feel. My bf is a real salt of the earth type that can't be rattled and makes me believe in a better tomorrow

you are responsibly for remaining non-reactive and unemotional in the face of their frightening behavior, the same way doctors at a mental hospital have to suppress their fight or flight instincts when their patients do or say crazy things.

you are also responsible for making sure you say or do nothing which could set her off, which is why the term 'walking on eggshells' is often used with BPD women.

unlike when dealing with children's bad behavior, it is extremely difficult to implement consequences and 'teachable moments' to a BPD woman because you are not dealing with a child, you're dealing with a very broken adult. no matter how much work you put in, the range for her to 'grow up' and blossom into a better person is limited.

don't mistake concern and pity for love. you cannot be in a relationship with this woman to 'fix' her, because that is pity at worst, charity at best. it isn't a good foundation for a mutually loving relationship.

>>33254291
>Why?

Because if you love a BPD unrepentantly, unwaveringly, you become an emotional mirror. They catch a glimpse of themselves, their personality, which they themselves can't see mentally. (They have a very low sense of 'self'). They end up seeing themselves, witnessing their own behaviours, seeing the ugly image, and they run. They do not want to know themselves at all. The worst thing for a BPD in the entirely world is to be alone with their own thoughts, it's kryptonite for them. So by loving them without flinching, they are forced to confront themselves. And they do not like that one bit. Scares them. They run.

>>33254328
>I can tell you've had first hand experience. It's fucking tragic and painful.

Yeah I have. BPD is a devastating disorder. I wholly believe the experience is worse for the BPD than those they burn. Which says a lot because they burn you real good. Those poor fucks been burning internally forever.

>>33254412
Thought it was implied but I was asking about straight relationships

>>33254579
Ohoho nice joke my friend

>>33253440
every bpd girl I've known is like that.
people with mental illness are way more predictable than normal people
they lose their personality and gain some characteristics similar to thousands of other people going through the same
I kinda think the real npcs are mentally ill people, you've known one, you've known all of them.

Let's say I'm already fucked in the head and don't plan on living for much longer but still want to experience any semblance of love before I kms, should I just go for it and date a BPD?

>>33254648
don't traumatize her further than she already is
these people think they have more importance in everyone's lives than they actually do so they WILL take your suicide as their making and might make them do it too.

>>33254660
She doesn't have to find out, we'll just break up and I'll say I'm moving away or something

Don't. They will unload (maybe deliberately, maybe not) their issues onto your plate and screw up your life. Stay the f*** away from women who have ANY kind of weirdness or hangup. Strict veggie, astrology nut, anything. Don't underestimate the damage they can do to your life and your overall happiness.

>>33250639
lol. as soon as something real stressful like a real adult event happens you'll be in so much shit. My sister is BPD and she's a terror and her BFs don't realize how... not there.. she really is.

I almost got murdered by my ex (probably BPD) gf before I swore off all BPD people.

She'll do something to you one day after like I said, some real challenge. It could be just general life stress and she'll snap and ruin your life.

I don't have a diagnosis, but I've spent my whole life suspecting that I am mentally ill in some way or another. I think that if I was ever forced to get a diagnosis, I would probably get a diagnosis for depression. But since getting a diagnosis is basically a death sentence in terms of social life or getting a job, I won't expose myself to that risk.
What was described in this thread sounds a lot like me.

I was in love with a man, but every time we were together, even for a moment, something bad has happened. It was as if the whole universe was against us being together. After some time I realised that it would be cruel for us to be together because I'm just too broken as a person and I would hurt him constantly, even though I tried my best not to do so. I finally managed to convince myself that I should leave him alone and never attempt to be with him or anyone ever again.

Fast forward a couple of months and I met a guy who is really into me, he's nice enough that I like him too, but I don't want to be with him because I know that I'm fucked up and I begged him to move on and find someone else. He didn't, he insisted that he loves me and that my mental issues don't bother him and that I make him happy (he has some serious family issues and isn't doing the best mentally because of that). I felt sorry for him and I wanted him to be happy so I relented and now we are together.
However I have constant bouts of depression and it's taking a toll on him, even though he denies it. I want him to leave me and be happy with somebody else because I know that I am just too broken to be capable of being in a relationship with anyone. He has suffered enough in life and he doesn't desereve to be with someone who will hurt him constantly - I just can't control it.

Anons, if you ever run into someone who is broken, don't be with them, don't try to fix them. Especially if they themselves warn you that you shouldn't pursue a relationship with them.

>>33254747
Jesus, is burning yourself on a pyre of self-sacrifice worth it to get a better job? Your social circle doesn't have to know. Physiological mental illness like in BPD can't be fully fixed with cognitive therapy; you can get control over how you act on emotions but you'll be blunted and STILL feel like shit.

What's worse is BPD will send your mind into a self-feeding spiral that tells you fixing the problem is worse than the problem because it's unknown to you, and your brain is wiring itself to tell you failure is inevitable. I've read enough to see those aren't your real thoughts. Stop letting your body win and let yourself be rational again.

>>33254747
Here's how you can stop being a toll on him:
Don't be a bitch
Don't bitch
Don't use up his money
Be grateful for what you have
Cook him food
Clean the house
Suck his dick (optional)
Smile (it's crazy how much more attractive one becomes just by smiling)
If you think your mental problems are fucking him up then suppress them, deny having any mental problems. Don't let your depression define who you are and let it rule over you, just pretend it's not there and don't talk about it. I know it sounds ridiculous but just tell your depression to fuck off

>>33248528 (OP)
1. Don't.
2. Ignoring step 1, just know it will be ups and downs and they will probably ruin your life.

>>33254791
How do I get my thoughts in control then? I've tried meditation, but clearing my mind is impossible. Half of the time I am reasonable, even normal, the other half I am a hair's width away from a violent suicide.
I fear drugs because I know most of them have horrific long-term effects. I have very bad experiences with therapy.

>>33254796
>be grateful
I am grateful for living in a country where I won't get shot, bombed or beheaded as soon as I leave the house. The climate here is nice.
>don't spend his money
I do try to spend as little as possible. I dislike when someone else pays for everything, so I guess that's better than nothing.
>cooking and cleaning
Standard activities, it's hard sometimes, but most of the time I manage to force myself. Self-care on the other hand is much more difficult because I see it as less critical to my functioning, therefore I postpone it. If I postpone it too much I feel disgusting and useless. There's also the feeling of being unworthy of care. It feels like I take better care of my computer than my own body. I wish I could enter a command and fix myself the same way I update my computer...

>I know it sounds ridiculous
No offence, but it does sound a bit ridiculous. If I could just literally tell my mental illness to fuck off it would have left me already. I might have misunderstood what you wrote, however.
I can't pretend to be fine because then shit will just be worse when the day comes and I lose it. It's even more tiring than not hiding my condition.
I have tried to write down my thoughts and burn them (symbolically get rid of them forever) and it did help a bit, but they come back as soon as I mess up the slightest thing. I have literally wished to kill myself over petty things such as forgetting to water plants or buy bread (even though these things can easily be fixed). I have also tried TRE and it helped with my muscle pains, it released deeply accumulated tension, so that's nice I guess.
I am open to suggestions.

>>33250348
This is extremely spot on, she literally invented out of thin air some bullshit to break up with me, absolute insanity.

>>33255009
>If I could just literally tell my mental illness to fuck off it would have left me already
Unironically do it. People don't do this because it intuitively is retarded as fuck. But if you stop caring, like actually stop caring and take a look at the world around you you'll realize your brain is bullshitting you. Picrel isn't a meme it worked for me and fucking annihilated my anxiety and depression, I'm still anti social, not because I'm scared of people anymore, but because I don't care anymore. I still want to kill myself but I don't feel sad for no reason anymore and I'm completely incapable of feeling anger anymore, I'm pretty much emotionally dead, which gets extremely awkward some times but eh, if you stop caring nothing matters.
Don't take life seriously, you won't get out alive.

>>33248528 (OP)
>Advice for dating women that are BPD
Do you enjoy depression and being thrown at the bottom of your onw emotions?
Trust me on this it's NOT worth it, it's like investing millions on Bitcoin only for it to dump all it's value overnight.

Bros since this is the closest topic in this matter, I need help
My ex was NPD, and fuck man it's been almost a year since our breakup, but she left me in the dump It feels like I'll never recover emotionally from what I've been through with her. Do you guys that had similar experiences have any advice on getting better from this shit?

>>33255087
Well, I have desired to go into the woods and scream my sick heart out... I've seen people on the internet reccommending going into nature and praying out loud, even screaming at God if need be (if you believe in a deity, it seems like an ok idea). Why not try this as well then? Thank you anon.

I wish you well :)

>>33248528 (OP)
Run

>>33255121
I don't know how well this would work, but nothing is stopping you from trying it.

>>33255116
>Do you guys that had similar experiences have any advice on getting better from this shit?

Yes though I didn't date an NPD chick long enough to know the differences too much from BPD. The narcissistic chick was easier to get over, to be honest. She was grandiose in her narcissism and she saw me as an 'important person' then lured me into a relationship, then once she felt she 'won' she quickly devalued me and moved on. Narc chicks move quick and leave quick. BPD chicks not so much. NPD girl is like a gunshot wound to the head. It's quick and painful but it's over and done with. BPD chicks keep coming back and then pulling away and coming back, bit like taking a spiritual stabbing over and over.

In both cases, the best way to move on is to admit you were 50% of the problem. It's easy to demonise bpds, npds, ASPDs etc and make no mistake — they were the initiator of toxicity. They were the ones who fired the first shot and fucked you up.

But if there's any lesson to take away from them, it's this: they fucked you over because (you) let them. That's more or less what aby cluster B will tell you if they are forced to admit to the truth: they did what they did because you let them, therefore it was easy.

That's 50% of your responsibility. Lack of boundaries and self respect. They feed on it. The best course of action is to start practicing your boundaries and strengthen your self esteem moving forward. They stop becoming a problem after that. They only gravitate towards low self respect codependents. They aren't interested in fighting hard to fuck someone with self respect over, costs them too much energy and they can't stand rejection or abandonment for longer than a week.

>>33255009
You need something to help you with the depressive bouts. Staying in this cycle isn't going to be any better than the meds. The meds can be balanced to a point it gets you by without turning you into a zombie. I had to come out and tell my boss the reason I couldn't come to work was because I simply couldn't get out of bed and thought I might have bipolar based on things my family had been telling me for years. Knew her for a long time, found out right then she had bipolar I with psychosis but the meds kept it under control. Nothing seemed weird about her.

Right now you're equating your emotional state to how things really are. Your physiology is screaming at you that things are bad, things are dangerous, things are hopeless. The fact you understand the way you're feeling isn't rational is a good first step. The next is unmarrying your cognitive mind with the orchestra of chemicals that regulate your mood.

>>33255218
The problem is that I was 3 years with her I gave her everything and now I realized she left me with nothing and she seems to be thriving with all the thing I helped her get, she was like a vampire.
And yes I already came to terms with how I tolerated a bunch of her bullshit and diminished myself in the process.
But thanks man, this shit has been hell for me, it also doesn't help that I'm with problems in my family + unemployed, feels like I'm at my lowest point.

>>33255009
>I am open to suggestions.

Nta and I'm unsure if you're trying to evaluate yourself as a BPD or not. My advice for any personality disordered nigga out there is this:

Uncover the facade from the disorder. Doesn't matter if it's BPD, NPD, ASPD or whatever, all of em are just different flavours of the same beast: complex post traumatic stress disorder (cPTSD). That is the core of it all.

Not all trauma child(s) grow up to have a personality disorder, but every personality disordered person are almost always trauma children at the core.

The thing about PTSD/cPTSD is it's a very foggy and very achy and very dissociating mental wound. You can have it your whole life and not even realize it, due to identifying with it for as long as you can remember (especially from childhood where you didn't know or learn any better).

So you become an adult and for some reason, everyone can function. But you can't. Everyone can emotionally grow and thrive, but you can't. You end up chasing this depression monster to try and slay, but no matter what, no matter the medicine or therapy, it never goes away. It even spills over into your physical health, existing becomes tiresome and heavy, your body feels like a clunky meat robot you are forced to drag and carry.

And you can't figure out why.

Unresolved and unprocessed mental and emotional pain is what causes it. Bottling up years, decades of horrid shit, that punches an abyssal void in your psyche eventually. You become hollow and numb, and you remain none the wiser except you look to death as a way out.

In simple terms: there's two types of people - people who were brought up, and people who were fucking dragged up. Those who got dragged up have broken spirits. That's the crux of cptsd.

>>33255234
>she seems to be thriving with all the thing I helped her get, she was like a vampire.

And she does not know how to get anything from her own life as a result. Her consequence is she will never feel like she truly has one. Living dead is what she knows to be in the inside. At least you kept your soul, man. All you can do is hope and pray one day she finds her own.

>Feels like I'm at my lowest point
It's because you are. There's even lower points in life believe it or not. But as far as you are concerned, it's genuinely the worst thing that's happened to you. And it's true. But don't forget: you can know the heights of your own spirit from the depths you fall. Painful as it all is, you can gleam evidence that you have it in you to climb high, precisely because you fell.

Rest up, bro. You'll climb again. And with the knowledge you gained from the shit experience, you'll keep your footing next time, spotting social dangers and avoiding toxic people. Leads you to healthy stable people. You'll get there.

Listen to the Anon s on here. You can't help or love these women, and they can't love you. They need mental health care not a white knight. Stay away for your own good, OP.

>>33254540
That's rough, I've often sat and wondered about how the breakup affected her.

Can anyone else confirm how BPD behave after they've dumped their victim?

>>33255285
Thanks brother, really.
Now I indeed know how to spot people like her in mere seconds, So i know I won't fall for the same tricks again. Right now I'm focusing on getting a job, I guess that after that gets done I'll be able to move forward a little better.
Thanks again.

Judging by what most people here are saying, most people with bpd are to be avoided for any kind of serious relationship unless they have decided to take responsibility for themselves and get the help needed for at least a year or so. It's honestly kind of sad to know that these people are basically ticking time bomb.

>>33255530
Basically, no one can help them but themselves and they'll make sure life is miserable for anyone that tries to help them, even professionals. BPD and NPD are no joke, it's like trying to help someone that is being actively fried by electricity.

The mentally ill should just be shown regard from a distance. They aren't fit to breed and musn't be allowed to have sex. We might question the emotional and physical needs of the mentally ill to determine if these things matter. Only to an extent that considers longterm consequences where a mentally ill person can be liable for irreparable damages caused by his or her illness. Some conditions are heritable, such as Bipolar Disorder, so it is best to not allow that condition, among others, to spread through reproduction, even if the chance is low. The mentally ill are unfortunate to lack a certain capacity to enjoy life as do the neurotypical, so we must shed a tear for the undeserved state in which they suffer. For some, there is no hope and there never will be.

What I can't stand about dating someone with BPD is how they are ALWAYS RIGHT.
ALWAYS.

No matter how insane it is, no matter if what they're saying breaks all sorts of logic, laws, traditions, common sense, etc. They're right and you're wrong, period.
And if you don't see it their way, YOU are a horrible person, not them. YOU are crazy. YOU need medication.

That sort of behavior breaks me in a way you wouldn't believe. I have to distance myself from people like that because it's the only situation where it really makes me feel like going abusive and just call someone a crazy bitch and wipe their smug faces with my fist. I was unlucky enough to find 2 girls like that and I had to ghost both of them before getting to that point and losing my mind.

How do you people deal with living with someone with BPD?

She makes my life a living nightmare and I can't escape from it. The good moments are very good and the bad ones, very bad. In the good she will treat me like a god, in the bad ones, like a filthy subhuman trash.

Sometimes I think there's some sort of spell on me, or stockholm's syndrome or something. I just can't make myself get up and leave her. That idea is completely absurd, unthinkable. So I hate myself for staying and hate myself for wanting to leave.

>>33255615
Dating the mentally ill is like scraping the bottom of a barrel when you could do alot better. If a person is given a choice between dating someone who is mentally ill versus someone who is mentally healthy, the sensible choice is obvious. The sick will often be left to rot because they don't make the cut. I am one such mentally ill person who knows that I am doomed to my dark and lonely existence. What I suffer from isn't deserved and is the result of chance not being in my favor. Sure, I take medications and seek out other effective treatments, but I am still sick under all of that and, from my perspective, unelligible for a relationship. Others would argue against my viewpoint, but I decided to think beyond myself and not trouble other people with my problems because they don't need to deal with them in the context of a relationship. I will die alone but it's for the best. My fulfillment will never happen but it will for other people at least.

>>33248528 (OP)
either you abuse them or they abuse you. They don’t want healthy

>>33255650
The problem is that:
1- you are aware of your issues, most people are not. They truly believe there is absolutely nothing wrong with them, and the way they think is completely normal.

2- A lot of them hide their true, twisted sides until you're emotionally invested in them.

>>33255665
I won't pull that shit on people since I have some kind of moral compass. Younger me would've wrecked someone's life just to try getting laid. Present me wised up.

>>33255659
This. Which is why they don't want a nice, stable relationship, they crave for wife beaters and degenerates.

Things would only be normal with my bpd ex when I would treat her like shit. Being verbally abusive, punishing her for bad behavior (oh you're acting crazy again? I'm leaving, gonna spend the weekend with my friends, have fun thinking I'll never come back) and stuff like that.


It worked. She would desperately shower me with sex, good behavior, anything I could possibly want just for me to call her a good girl.
The moment they notice that you're the weaker one, not them, it's over. They will walk all over you like you're nothing.

But, this got old fast.....I want someone that I can love and build a life together, not someone to constantly take care of because they might kill me while I sleep during a nice midnight emotional breakdown.

>>33255695
>they crave for wife beaters and degenerates.
This is real, one day my ex with NPD made me lose my shit completely and I screamed with her like I was about to kill her. I apologizide and felt like shit later. Some time pass and then she tells me that on that day she felt peace when I lost my shit, because it felt like "home" to her. That's when I knew what I was dealing with.

>>33255695
>build a life with
Fuck... enjoy the nuclear fallout from the devastation that divorce will bring about. You'll kill yourself in a bathtub with a toaster.

Jesus Christ is the Son of God, Who died for our sins and rose from the dead to give us the free gift of eternal life. He also promises to heal your body. You can ask Jesus for His gifts.

>>33248528 (OP)
in short
- enjoy the hot sex, but be very careful with protection
- never shit where you eat, she ideally isn't even from your city
- learn how to defuse the bomb and break up safely

Honestly, dating hot BPD chicks is more for jaded tennis coaches then anime loving anons. If you have to ask for tips, you will probably get stabbed with a knife

>>33255625
>So I hate myself for staying and hate myself for wanting to leave.
the trendy word for this is 'codependent'. codependent people trap themselves in a loop of being in a relationship with people they know will disappoint them. there is no way to solve it besides leaving.