No funny shit serious replies only.

I actually have been raped before so idk. But I’ve had this fwb for almost two years now. I’d already accepted my body is not as reactive and sex is just not as enjoyable for me most times and that’s fine. I’ve faked a couple of those orgasms.
This is he said something to me and I’ve started to realize. So he can get his fingers in but usually he can’t get his dick in. The last time we fucked he was like “so all it took was me saying how much I want to hold you down and rape you to get inside?” And I’m pretty sure it was just talk but sometimes he genuinely hits the mark with it. And I realized that the only times he was able to get inside was when he was forceful and threatening. I actually do like him and I’m actually attracted to him so I don’t know why this happens.

Is there something wrong with me? Is there someone I can talk to or something I can do to fix my brain? I actually just want to have normal sex. I get aroused and stuff, but it never goes further then that if it’s not that sort of situation or scenario.

>>33253715 (OP)
majority of women get horny from being threatened and humiliated.

>>33253715 (OP)
you might be a transwoman in an egg. very womanly thing desu

>>33253715 (OP)

Not me, but my ex was very dense and aggressive in bed, leaving large dark bruises on me whenever we were together and I eventually came to learn he had a rape fetish the night he tried to take my virginity. In fantasy, I have liked the concept of a hard, aggressive man in bed. But the nights were admittingly, unnecesssary painful with long lasting marks on my neck and inner thighs along with bleeding lips and hair loss

It was a long story, but he was basically impatient and didn't want to wait until marriage, and since he was heading out of state, he wanted me to show him my commitment and loyalty by giving myself up for him to reassure him that I wasn't taking advantage of him for validation

We got into a big fight that involved slapping, choking and essays of derogatory and dehumanizing terms and phrases

He kept telling me to, "Shut the fuck up and suck my cock".

Towards the end, I gave him a bj and he said it was the second time he ever came from a bj and it had to do with the scene; with him unleashing his aggression and anger, and me sobbing and trying to push him away

It explains his fetishes, "goodie bag" of bed toys and overall dense and murderous energy and treats when he was upset.

He was a buff Mexican, so self explanatory

He tried to enforce masculinity in an odd way. He felt quite try hard. A man attempting to achieve masculinity shouldn't be actively using the words, "Masculine, alpha, doormat, aggression, dominant, submission, my bitch". It's supposed to be a "show don't tell" concept.

>>33253715 (OP)
>>33254010
Are all women this crazy, or just you two?

Man these replies suck. Obviously it’s not normal but it’s common enough it’s talked about. I just want to know how to fix it. I don’t want any stories or any of that. None of these replies are helpful.

And no. I’m not a trans woman. What a weird thing to say???

>>33254070
See a sex therapist and stop asking strangers.

>>33254070
Just stop feeling ashamed of it, that’s literally it. A lot of women feel the same way to some extent, even in the absence of having been assaulted previously. You can go to a therapist if you want, but they’re just going to work towards the same end: not being ashamed.

>>33253715 (OP)
Sounds like you have vaginismus, if he’s having trouble actually getting inside without it. Lucky for you it’s an “all in your head” thing, and it can be ages before you realise what it is that actually releases your baginal muscles. My ex gf had it because she was mortally agraos of getting pregnant. Took her like three years to get over.

>>33253715 (OP)
Okay, so, quite a bit to unpack, here.

First off, it is surprisingly common for a woman who has been raped to try to partially recreate the experience afterwards; and it is not necessarily unhealthy. The actual rape was (I'm sure) quite horrible: you probably felt powerless and terrified. But by recreating aspects of the experience in a controlled environment - one where you are actually not in any danger and are able to stop if you choose to - you are taking that experience and making it safer and more controlled; and that helps you to process it and feel like you're getting some control over it. Whether it's healthy to keep doing this in the long term is debatable, but at least understand that it is quite common, and it doesn't mean anything is wrong with you, it's just your way of processing the trauma.

Now, when it comes to the question of why your guy has problems penetrating you, you're not really giving us enough information to go on, here. Maybe he has a big dick. Maybe you have vaginismus? (Google it if you don't know what that is). It could also be that he simply doesn't spend enough time and effort on foreplay, and so you aren't actually aroused enough for penetration to happen (or for it to happen comfortably) and it's only when something gives you an extra psychological boost that you get turned on enough for it to happen. Or it could be that the experience of the rape is preventing you from getting turned on, or that you have a hormonal issue, or hormonal birth control or some kind of medication is causing arousal problems, or any number of other things. You should probably talk to a sex therapist.

In the mean time, make sure your friend does a LOT more foreplay, including gently stretching you with fingers or a toy, and use LOTS of lube.