If we concede that porn and masturbation are more pleasurable than sex by design, why exactly should I be giving them up in order to make sex better?

I have never had sex that I've enjoyed more than porn and masturbation. I don't really want to be in a relationship with anyone or have kids. I don't want to have a family, and I struggle to honestly say I even want friends. People in my life in general have just hurt and disappointed me. The way I see it, porn and masturbation are one of the reliable few ways I can make myself happy. It confuses me then to see people say that these are what I should give up in order to make my life better. I also don't feel any shame about my desires or the things I do, so there doesn't seem to be any attached downside.

I am looking at ways to make my life better in general, but I'd say this is one of the things I see everyone talk about as a given that seems like the total opposite.

>>33257550 (OP)
So you concede that escapism is more important than living life and taking good with bad. Congrats, you're FunkoPop people.

>>33257554
What good/bad are you talking about specifically?

>>33257556
Relationships in a broad sense or in really any sense don't come in black and white or good and bad experiences. You're admitting that holding your cock in your hand and endlessly gooning away into the void is more important than getting away from your cock and experiencing things in life that might hurt you or make you feel wonderful. I don't thing r/gooning gives out membership cards, but you could ask.

>>33257561
What should I be doing if I can't recall ever having any genuinely good experiences in any of my relationships?

>>33257563
Leaving your nut sweat scented comfort cave and going to the park. Making small talk with old people. Watching life happen on a small scale with creatures just existing outside, or people watching. Go to places where your favorite things are discussed. Shitpost. Write a letter to God, a letter to your mom, a letter to Santa.
Just get away from your devices.

>>33257564
What if I'm doing those things and they're not making me happy? How frequently and for how long should I be doing them before I conclude that they're not giving me the intended result?

>>33257567
Depends. Do you feel like you're supposed to exist and just be comfortable all the time, or in a state of bliss?

>>33257550 (OP)
NoFappers are sexually frustrated and confused.

>>33257570
Honestly, I don't really want to exist at all. My life has not gone the way I wanted and I don't think it can get better. I just want to enjoy what I have left.

Who the fuck said this? Kys

>>33257574
That's usually the case. Going through the same on that front. I still want to experience joy in things external to me until the inevitable mic drop happens.

>>33257550 (OP)
>People in my life in general have just hurt and disappointed me. The way I see it, porn and masturbation are one of the reliable few ways I can make myself happy
This is the entire problem with your viewpoint
It's built upon a premise of avoiding potential harm not out of objectively neutral empiricism, you didn't arrive at this conclusion through sheer logic, you did it as a coping mechanism to not get hurt

Wanting/Not wanting to do things are fine, but if you're doing/not doing it as a coping mechanism, then you're mentally ill and you're not actually committed to the idea you're just taking the easy path out of fear and rationalizing afterwards

More importantly you're not being logically sound, otherwise you need to apply this facet to every part of your life
Everything is hard, why do anything? Why not avoid as much as possible to avoid being hurt

Frankly, you never grew up and still retain an immature childish way of thinking

Sexual stimulation is like tickling. You can do it to yourself but it’s not the same as when someone else does it.

>>33257665
>Wanting/Not wanting to do things are fine, but if you're doing/not doing it as a coping mechanism, then you're mentally ill and you're not actually committed to the idea you're just taking the easy path out of fear and rationalizing afterwards
I believe I am mentally ill, and I'm in therapy. I'm not sure how to identify if I genuinely want to do something or if it's a coping mechanism.

>More importantly you're not being logically sound, otherwise you need to apply this facet to every part of your life
>Everything is hard, why do anything? Why not avoid as much as possible to avoid being hurt
I don't believe everything is hard.

>Frankly, you never grew up and still retain an immature childish way of thinking
Very likely true. But I don't see anything better in front of me.

>>33257550 (OP)
>If we concede that porn and masturbation are more pleasurable than sex by design,
I concede nothing of the kind. You've just never had good sex.

>>33257676
In my experience, it's way worse when someone else does it though.

>>33257686
Possibly. Though it seems like a huge ask to put so much work into pursuing good sex when I have no guarantee I can have it.

>>33257550 (OP)
>I have never had sex that I've enjoyed more than porn and masturbation
Masturbation is comfortable/familiar/you're in control/nothing to worry or be anxious over. Even a fleshlight feels the same if not as good as the real thing. I don't think any serious person will contend with the aspect of physically being better or worse without a bias, but that's not what makes sex so amazing.

Sex is good MENTALLY/EMOTIONALLY, doesn't matter if physically it's the same or worse when you're brain is telling you it's better due to how you perceived it.
You can jack anytime you want, but a woman deliberately wanting to make you cum? That actually values your existence and wants you to feel good? They're comfortable and trust you enough that they're willing to be in such a vulnerable situation?
It's unbeatable for your mental state how good sex is.

If you're a sperg who doesn't care about or understand emotions you'll never get it

>>33257550 (OP)
the reason you cant enjoy sex, relationships, friendships and daily life is because you are addicted to porn and masturbation. Your brain craves instant, short term dopamine hits which is why you rely on porn and masturbation constantly. Id say its likely you have some from of ADHD which results in this dependance and need for short term satisfaction and constant dopamine as your brain doesn't naturally supply an adequate amount of it.

>>33257703
Yeah, I think that's definitely part of it. I'm not really comfortable with the idea of
>a woman deliberately wanting to make you cum? That actually values your existence and wants you to feel good? They're comfortable and trust you enough that they're willing to be in such a vulnerable situation?
I don't really want people in my life like that.

>>33257708
How do I view myself as having a constant reliance on porn and masturbation?

>>33257550 (OP)
I have a 7" incher, is difficult, the thing feels awesome to stroke. I can't understand why anyone with a 5" incher can't quit porn, there is no fantasy there.

>>33257550 (OP)
Nowadays society is too therapy brained.

>>33257688
>it seems like a huge ask to put so much work into pursuing good sex when I have no guarantee I can have it.
Your loss.

>>33257767
What am I losing exactly? I just told you that I don't enjoy sex.

>>33257550 (OP)
>I have never had sex that I've enjoyed more than porn and masturbation.

This is just a lie, right? It's a cope that virgins post about how they totally had sex you guys so that it doesn't come off as them being obvious virgins when they say that they don't want to have sex.

Like in what universe is watching other people having sex on your laptop and diddling yourself on your computer chair MORE pleasurable and enjoyable than sex?

That's like watching thousands of hours of videos of Japanese ramen in Japan while you're eating 50 cent discount bin instant noodles, talking about how your shit noodles are so much better than the ramen you dream about.

You're staring at a thing, pretending to be a part of the thing, and you're gonna talk shit that the thing is actually not all that enjoyable?

Bruh, the worst sex I ever had was still more enjoyable than the best time I had jacking off.

>>33257688
>it seems like a huge ask to put so much work into pursuing good sex
virgin talk

you meet a girl and ask her what she thinks is fun/interesting, go to the movies once or twice and then have sex

how is that some sort of Sisyphean impossible task?

>>33258998
I'm not a virgin.

>>33259019
Then please explain how jacking your dick off watching other people having sex is better than actually having sex

also, if you bought sex from a hooker one time and then later cried about it, it doesn't count, you're hardly King Sex who gets to declare that everyone agrees that sex is meh while jacking off is amazing and so much better than sex

>>33259031
>Then please explain how jacking your dick off watching other people having sex is better than actually having sex
I don't know. I just didn't enjoy sex.

Though I will say, all the "best" sex I've had has been with prostitutes. I have had some very bad sexual experiences otherwise.

>>33259048
were you straight up molested or what

like it's fine to be asexual, but there's no need to be talking shit about sex and hyping up jacking off at the computer.

hell I was molested, twice that I can recall, and again sex has always been at least "great" if not absolutely amazing.
Even the times where I was like one nothing away from breaking up with a girl and my dick would get soft in her mouth because I was no longer attracted to her etc that's at least more memorable and more engaging than just jacking off alone in the dark by myself

and yeah, hookers/prostitutes/etc are never a good thing imo

>>33259092
I'd rather not talk about my worst experiences, but I'll say they were very bad and not in a normal "bad lay" way.

The experience you describe with getting soft is actually basically my experience with sex in general. It does nothing for me, it doesn't excite me. Essentially sex is bad to mediocre from start to finish and I just don't have that experience with masturbation, which is consistently very good.

>>33257550 (OP)
>I am looking at ways to make my life better in general[...]
To
>[...]My life has not gone the way I wanted and I don't think it can get better.
Blatant contradictory statements within a few replies. If you do not genuinely believe that your life can get any better, then you aren't willing to apply any of the advice that you might be given here or by the people around you in real life, making your thread a pointlessly vent post. Not to play the pseudo-janny here, just pointing out that you're wasting everyone's time.

>>33257703
NTA but thats where I struggle. When Im having sex with a girlfriend, my mind is everwhere else BUT sex. I feel uncomfortable, overstimulated, tired, anxious, dirty, guilty etc.
I dont get any emotional pleasure from sex other than it being an indicator that a girl likes me enough to even be willing to do it.
I have never been able to cum from sex, not when I was 18 or when I was 30. My brain shuts down my dick shuts down, and I dont feel the sensation great enough to cum from plain sex.
I've tried kink sex, thinking if maybe the stuff I could get off to on the computer would translate to real life, but its exactly the same issue. I could be with someone who meets all my kinks needs and still not be able to cum until i can be alone and replay it in my head

>>33259132
OP here, pretty similar to my experience. I would actually say I get more emotional stimulation from masturbation.

>>33259096
>The experience you describe with getting soft is actually basically my experience with sex in general. It does nothing for me, it doesn't excite me. Essentially sex is bad to mediocre from start to finish and I just don't have that experience with masturbation, which is consistently very good.
Yeah man that's just nerves, you don't have to worry about impressing anyone or being embarrassed when it's just you jacking yourself off alone.

When there's at least one more person involved in a sexual act, then of course there's a level of stage fright. I've been everywhere from cumming in my pants while we were mostly still fully clothed to not being able to achieve orgasm despite being rock hard and plapping her all night long because of nerves. I farted once, too.

I guess I'm a "sapiosexual" or whatever as the kids call it since I was never one to chase after a girl who I had nothing in common with just because she had nice tits. Without the bare minimum of some sort of emotional connection even if it's the most superficial surface level bullshit like we both like some rock bands, I have no sexual interest in a girl.

Like the conventionally "hot" girl who's got no interests or hobbies besides social media and fashion I could never get my dick hard for, but some weird 6/10 who's into the same thing as me will get me as hard as diamonds.

Like I said, hookers aren't gonna do anything for your sexual confidence, you need to find your own 6/10 nerd girl.

>>33257550 (OP)
Because good sex is unfathomably better than your hand and a screen

>>33257550 (OP)
You might be ace-spec. Nothing wrong with that. Society places way too much emphasis on getting laid and I think people would be happier if more of them were willing to admit they weren't interested in partnered sex. It's perfectly OK to only be interested in masturbation.

>>33257550 (OP)
That's quite alright. No-one will miss you when you're gone from the genepool. Think of it as evolution in action, that monstrosities like you get weeded out.

>>33259175
So would you say this is more of an issue of anxiety or lack of connection? Or are they related?

>>33259132
im in a similar boat, but not as extreme. im hoping that if i can be with the right person long enough i'll feel more comfortable.

>we concede that porn and masturbation are more pleasurable than sex by design
we dont you absolute fucking retard. we concede its EASIER and MORE ACCESSIBLE than real sex and use it as a SUBSTITUTE.

>>33257550 (OP)
>I have never had sex that I've enjoyed more than porn and masturbation
well you're a loser
my advice: get out more

>>33262733
Why should I view myself as a loser?

>>33257550 (OP)
Porn doesn't actually make you happy. It is just like taking crack, you get a temporary high and then you experience withdrawal which makes you less effective in life.

>>33264028
What specifically are these withdrawal symptoms?

>>33262239
If you also have close to zero male friends, def the lack of connection.

>>33259153
>I would actually say I get more emotional stimulation from masturbation.
bro what who is getting emotional over what there

you're watching whatever you watch like a girl dildoing herself or complete strangers fuck each other on a screen, for money, where is the emotional element?

>>33264058
Depression, anxiety, numbness, emotional instability, loss of motivation, loss of social skills. When someone is a coomer you can immediately tell. They smell bad and they're too weak to engage socially.

>>33257554
The reality is that the average Funko Pop collector is happier with his life and has a better social life than the average seething anticonsumerist 4channer.

>>33259092
>asexual
No such thing. Just losers who cope with not getting laid.

>>33257550 (OP)
Jacking it's better than sex but BJs are better than both
Do it for the BJs

>>33264070
A lot of it comes from ERP. I have very fond memories of the things I've done or am doing in situations like those. So maybe I am feeling some kind of emotional connection when I do that, but not when I am around other people in normal life.

>>33264189
>Jacking it's better than sex
why do people keep repeating this obvious lie

>>33264231
Why do you want it to be a lie?

>>33264286
In all of my times having sex, I never once had the thought mid-thrust or post-coitus or at any other time during sex where I was all "yeah... this is OKAY I guess.... what would really be objectively better was if I was by myself sitting at my computer watching other people doing this instead while I stroke my half-erect penis"

that's like cuck behavior, diddling yourself in the cuck chair watching other people have sex

>>33264398
Okay, but you're not really understanding what I'm getting at. If someone is claiming they had a different experience than you, why would you rather they be a liar?

>>33264424
>If someone is claiming they had a different experience than you
They're not, they're claiming jacking off is better than sex. Have you seen OP's thread?

>>33264432
I am OP.

>>33264496
Oh neat, well just to refresh your memory about what the entire premise of the thread is

>If we concede that porn and masturbation are more pleasurable than sex by design

That's not "I had a different experience"

>>33264549
I might be wrong about that, but it's impossible to know exactly how other people feel. I'm saying this because in my experience it's the case, but also because I've seen a lot of people who say that porn is generally better than sex, by design, and that is why it can be addictive. Essentially that it's hyperstimulating in a way that will put anything else to shame. So it made me want to ask, if that is the case, and porn really is that much more enjoyable, but I don't seem to be experiencing the downsides that others talk about, why would I stop using it? I just want to weigh my pros and cons here.

>>33257665

>>33264568
>but also because I've seen a lot of people who say that porn is generally better than sex, by design, and that is why it can be addictive.
Have you never heard of people who get addicted to sex? Dudes who ruin relationship after relationship after marriage after marriage because they can't stop chasing side pussy? Women who also have a revolving door of cock for them to jump on? Dudes who spend thousands upon thousands of dollars on hookers?

Arnold Schwarzenegger ruined his marriage to a Kennedy because he couldn't help himself from plapping his fat mexican cleaning lady and even hit her raw. There was that app/website designed exclusively for people to cheat on their partner where all the data got leaked years ago.

but anyways
>and porn really is that much more enjoyable, but I don't seem to be experiencing the downsides that others talk about, why would I stop using it?
because you're experiencing the downside of convincing yourself, and trying to convince others, that porn is better than sex

>>33264628
So you're saying that I enjoy sex, even though I feel that I don't?

>>33265018
hookers take most if not all of the enjoyment out of sex, so yeah

>>33265028
Why is that exactly? Because you don't feel emotions toward them? But I don't feel emotions toward other people either.

>>33257556
Anon don't play stupid. Y'know you can't lie to youself with all that degeneracy. Not even all of us. If you think you can replace relationships, friendships, and life than you're sorely mistaken. Not even an A.I girlfriend can ever replace something that is so complicated because we are just more than robots.

>>33264095
That's a straw of bullshit and you know it. Plus who the fuck collects funkopops? Their black bean eyes are so soulless. Face it fag, there's more to the world than fucking collecting funkopops.

>>33268919
I'm not sure what you're saying. I'm not trying to replace relationships.

OP, you’re a faggot. Could you perhaps consider killing yourself? As a member of a white supremacist group, you bring shame to our race.

>>33269660
That's not the point fag. The point is that you're more complicated than your animalistic urges or robotic retarded priorities of porn and masturbation. Those things won't make you happy sooner or later, you gonna like, "Man, I wanna fuck." Mark my words fag.

>>33258937
>what am I losing exactly
Do you think your semen comes from nothing? Quite the opposite. It’s the most incredible substance on earth and it requires resources to create it. You literally have brain rot from the constant tax on your system.

>>33271762
Are you assuming I'm jerking off constantly? I jerk off less than 5 times a week on average. I could do it more, but I don't have a high sex drive.

>>33271713
I do have sex sometimes. It's worse than masturbation. I actually wish I didn't have the desire at all because I always regret it.

You know what's working out well for me? Unironically a cock cage or cock sleeve.

>Put it on
>look at porn
>get hard
>try to jack off, but cage prevents feeling any physical pleasure from hand.
>porn is just another image on a screen at that point. Subconscious begins to differentiate between real sex and simulated sex again.
>Unironically get bored.
>Do this for about 3 months.
>....
>cured

The best part is you don't have to wear it all the time. Just whenever you're in your special spot where you would normally jack off. What's happening here is your body is associating pictures with real sexual pleasure. If you deny the sexual pleasure from the images the association is broken.

I know they're fetishized to shit now, but there was a time when they had the noble intention of keeping people chaste.

>>33257684
Everything is a coping mechanisms to push away the futility™.

After you realise the futility™, there is no longer anything in front of you, just things to help you forget the futility™. Death is the only end.

>>33257550 (OP)
Heroin also makes you feel better than anything else, might as well start doing that too while you're sitting there with your dick in your hand.

>>33258998
You sound like a virgin

>>33274798
Heroin has negative side effects. Being alone doesn't, at least for me. I don't get lonely.

Well sugar, first of all—ain’t nothin’ wrong with knowin’ what brings you comfort. If porn and a little solo rodeo are what help you feel safe and satisfied, I ain't here to shame it. Life’s hard, and if you’ve been hurt by people, it makes perfect sense you'd lean into what feels reliable.

But here’s the question: are you feelin’ fulfilled… or just numb enough to function? There’s a difference, baby.

You ain’t broken for wantin’ peace over chaos. But don’t confuse survival mode with a finished story. You deserve real joy—not just safe pleasure. And maybe, just maybe, there’s more for you than you’ve seen so far.

When you're ready to poke your head out that emotional bunker, I’ll be right here at DirtyDebi.com—sippin’ sweet tea and rootin’ for ya

>>33275221
thanks chatgpt