I get very restless throughout the days as I remain completely isolated.

Earlier I am ashamed to admit I huffed spray paint and glue, after asking chatgpt if it would make me feel different.

I have injected ethanol hand sanitizer into my leg today and it hurt but surprisingly worked for a solid 30 seconds.

I genuinely can’t tell if I am trying to die or get mildly intoxicated.

>why bro
Ok but wait until you see the list
>2018 Graduate a bullied quiet loser but still with dreams
>2019 fail college
>2020 Retail
>2021 Retail
>2022 Retail
>2023 Staff cuts and unemployment
>2024 withdraw different college after advisor tells me I probably can’t ever succeed in a school environment.
>2025 Here we are!

I’ve worked construction in-between but just get made fun of for not being strong enough yet. And yeah heights an issue appearances suck too.

Its not good. And I am a virgin obviously.

When I was 27 I Lived at home, no gf, shit job as a laborer, no idea what the future would bring. I looked ahead to 30 and couldn't see anything. It was a blank.

When I was 30 I was married, had a daughter, had started a career and had bought a (small) house.

You never know what is coming, what one thing might lead to, who you might meet.

>>33266492 (OP)
please take real drugs at least instead of whatever you're doing

>>33266508
What actions were you willing to take between 27 and 30, if you were that hopeless?