Do you have to have a wife and kids to be happy and fulfilled?

Why would you think you need that to feel happy and fulfilled?

>>33272888 (OP)
There are people fulfilled without those things and people with those things unfulfilled

Nope. Only if that's what you know you want. Doing something because you expect it to magically make you happy and fulfilled usually won't make you happy and fulfilled.
As others have said in this thread, there are people who have a wife and kids and still don't feel fulfilled.
Think about your wishes and goals in life, anon. About the things you know bring you happiness (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.

>>33273076
Don't do that gay emoji shit

>>33273230
>triggered by some lines and dots
why are the right so sensitive LOL

>>33272928
Let me guess - you're married with children.

>>33272888 (OP)
Not gonna say yes cause this looks different for different people.
But for me, yes. Had my first kid at 35. My life wasnt even had before. Id say pretty average leaning to good.

Nothing I have ever done in my entire life means fuck all compared to the feeling of having a child.

>>33273419
>wasnt even had
That's "bad". Sorry.

>>33273230
emoticons are not emoji, zoom zoom. 4chan doesn't support emoji

>>33272888 (OP)
>Do you have to have a wife and kids to be happy and fulfilled?
I have both. It simultaneously gives me happiness & fulfillment and stress & struggle at the same time. I think that marriage and kids is one major way towards fulfillment, yes. But it's not the only way, and moreover, the happiness and fulfillment comes and goes in waves. Nothing in this life can bring any of us 24/7 happiness, because emotions have expiry dates the good and the bad.

What having a family gives you is a purpose, a big reason to keep going, to keep waking up in the morning, a reason to suffer and a reason to love in equal measure.

So, no, you don't >have< to have a wife and kids to be happy and fulfilled. But if you truly want it, it will give you happiness and fulfillment consistently enough – not 24/7, but enough to give a sense of purpose as described. But remember, you have to want it, not merely just feeling like you have to, like it's some arbitrary expectation.

>>33272888 (OP)
I'm 37 and feel pretty useless without a wife and kid. Last gf I was dating didn;t want kids and when I got a promotion and a raise and had more money I was thinking wtf is going on with my life. Just have money and don;t do anything with it?

If you believe you could live aimlessly in hedonistic endeavors and not kill yourself at some point, you are wrong.

At some point you'll become aware you are a expendable genetic failure.

>>33272888 (OP)
I won't read yet another chin-scratcher schizo "wondering" thread on this _advice_ board.

>>33273868
You just did

Yes

There's nothing to do after you've "won' everything else

You can make good money, have cute gf, and enjoy the luxury of just taking a trip whenever tf you want without worrying about family

But eventually, there are only so many vacations you can take / restaurants to eat in / video games to play / drugs to do / concerts to attend / etc etc

You want to be surrounded by family at the death bed, or alone at 60? You want to experience the last few months of cancer by yourself? "My friends! My brother and sister! My cousin and dog!" you'd be surprised how little ppl give a shit past 50, especially when they have their own lives/families to worry about.

FWIW I never wanted kids either. Shitty upbringing with my parents and all that. Growing up, everyone told me "you'll start thinking about it when you turn 30" and I'd think "no way". Sure enough, I turned 30, and it happened.

Women feel this but x100 stronger because of biological clock. They go crazy without kids. Even as a man, you'll realize most couples don't stay together past 6-7 years unless they start a family.

If you're a moralfag, there's also no "buy-in" to society if you don't have kids. No consequences to making the world a shittier place when you leave.

It sounds silly, but once the reality of dying with leaving nothing behind starts to hit, it is incredibly depressing. Almost like... the entire journey was meaningless.

oh no the fucking stick figure schizo is back

ideally yeah.
but you never know. your wife might divorce you and take half you shit. your kids might end up hating you, or turn trans. there's no shortage of men who had it all and wish they'd stay single their entire lives.
life is a gamble.

>>33272888 (OP)
Kid yes, of your own seed. Wife, idk, means to an end.

>>33273076
Truth. There's more to life than wife and kids.

Adding: There's literally a whole world outside of wife and kids. Ironically having kids can stop you from seeing it. They're a huge drain on time and resources. The wife can stop you, too, if she's not like-minded. It's best to do what makes you happy, not what everyone says you're "supposed to do".

Dunno about you guys but I can't really see myself living into my 50s or 60s without a wife or family.

I think I get through the days now, in my 30s, because subconsciously I still cling to some sort of hope that there's a possibility I might meet a woman who likes me for some reason and wants to spend her time with me. But it's much harder to picture myself aged 55, still living alone, never having been in a relationship. I don't know what I would be living for at that point.

That's not to say that people can't create meaningful lives for themselves in the absence of wives and children, but I think for most normal people starting a family is probably the easiest 'meaningful' thing for them to do with their lives. Absent that, I don't see myself being one of those guys who creates meaning by climbing all the highest mountains or writing a series of novels or whatever.

Gvfd

You do realize that the majority of married couples today aren’t actually happy, right?

>>33278386
Might it be because they don't talk effectively, are constantly bombarded with financial problems that they aren't prepared for and/or aren't honest and dedicated?

>>33278411
Those are factors. But it doesn’t change the fact that the majority of married couples aren’t actually happy. Also a lot of people get married for the sake of getting married. They aren’t truly deeply in love with their spouse. It’s more of “I like this person and can live with them”. The latter experience depressing marriages in the long term. They are the majority. The ones who are truly in love with their spouse are the minority; those are the ones who actually have a happy long term marriage

>>33278446
A lot of people probably do go into it for the sake of the pomp and attention that goes into getting married too. Look at the cost of the modern wedding, how long it took that couple to go from getting together to getting married, and how much it just looks like checking boxes vs being in love. That, and I can't give a shit about the statistics for npc marriages and relationship interactions. They just exist to go through the linear processes already as is, and aren't people.

>>33272888 (OP)

I dont think its the same for all people.

I never got married but had 3 kids from 23-27.

2 girls and a boy, best thing that ever happened to me (we never planned it)

me and baby mom broke it off, my kids are 10,8,6 and are old enough to have independent relationships with me, I am 33 now, look forward to being off all child support by 45, I can support my children directly they will all be 18+.

Hope for grandkids :)

>>33278446
Nta but anyone who talks about how people aren't happy or happy enough etc are usually full of shit. Happiness 24/7 is a fantasy dreamt up by hedonistic idiots. Nowhere in life will you ever reach a permahappy place. Life is full of just as much struggles as high points. And that's fine. Life would be boring if it were just happy happy happy. And the most miserable people of all are those who believe and expect constant happiness.

>>33278473
>would be boring if it were just happy happy happy.
This sounds like cope

>>33278473
Buddhist monks live their entire lives in peace.

>>33278487
Not cope, the truth. Pain and suffering is necessary in life because it is the driving factor for growth. Humanity is not about happiness. Humanity is about adapting. That's our ace up the sleeve that separates us from the animals. We adapt, adapt, and adapt. A true blooded human - especially males - should seek struggle, strife, and risk on purpose for the sole reason of knowing it is a catalyst for growth to become stronger.

Weak men are born out of comfort and become weaker the longer they only live for comfort. Like a little poodle or something. They are never happy which is ironic, all they chased was happiness but it never stuck around, and they even try to commit suicide over it, because they can it face the alternative of accepting suffering and learning how to carry it while thriving.

>>33278487
>>33278512
This

When I was young, hungry, and battling adversity - I became unstoppable. And it felt right. I didn’t think of depression. I had anxiety, but I fought through it until it eventually became nothing to be scared of.

Every day was improving myself or learning new things. Always progress, even when shit happens. I was sharp, no brain fog. I developed a “no excuses” attitude. Never procrastinated. If I wanted to do something, I’d get up and do it.

Basically retired in my mid/late 20’s and the next few years proceeded to be the most boring and depressing times of my life. Despite all the awful shit I went thru in early life, I had never experienced depression up until that point. I don’t even need a high bar of stimuli or anything, I’ve always been happy just having some books to read or a wifi connection to look at shitposts online.

I had no real issues either. Never had problems getting girls. Had my own condo, nice car. Shit started to go downhill once I stopped challenging myself or seeking comfort / easy routes / path of least resistance. Eventually, anxiety came back, brain fog crept in, started getting lazy, then depressed.

I became incredibly “weak” doing this instead of just getting strong enough to handle things. It’s not the way to go.

>>33278604

You have great retrospective ability

>>33278654
Thanks, me.

>>33273764
why are their helmets blue
why are their helmets blue
why are their helmets blue

why are their helmets blue
what the fuck

You can only be happy and fulfilled by what you truly want in life. What your soul longs for. Which means being honest with yourself about what you want - and not feeding yourself bullshit about “the right thing” or following what you “should” do.
You will be happy and fulfilled when you are following your own honest truth. And that does include struggle and that does include difficulty. There would be no success or feeling of accomplishment without. So fight, rage, struggle.
And yeah, having a wife and kids would be a struggle. Keep your wife safe, happy. Keep your relationship with her honest and strong. Keep your patience with whatever bullshit she brings up, and she should do the same for you. But only if that’s what you want. You’re fine just as you are, if that’s what has you happy and fulfilled.

>>33273262
>being a centrist/leftist
>using 4chan

Go back to plebbit.

>>33282111
Nta but you’re delusional if you think majority of 4chan is right leaning lmao

>>33272888 (OP)
If anything it's the opposite. The ideal way to be happy and fulfilled is to enter a situation where tue financial/social obligations of starting a family no longer affect you. If even one of your friends is married with children, while you're a bachelor, they will constantly do little things to remind you that you somehow "failed" or something. Even on 4chan people will call you Reddit for just not giving a fuck about relationships. The reality is that it's all peer pressure and most of us would be better off letting the hordes of migrants kill each other before giving this society thing another go.

Have a wife & kids if you want to be miserable. You're giving up up on all your goals in life to be in constant economic duress while tied to a woman who's probably getting fat and who you're probably going to hate in a decade or less.

>>33272888 (OP)
Some men, yes, but not all.
Why?

>>33282574
Anywhere politics are discussed on 4chan tends to end up being largely right leaning. Mostly because leftism is objectively wrong on almost every issue and so gets BTFOd in any debate

>>33282574
Most people are right leaning, so is 4chan