>What is /htgwg/?
How to Get Women General is by men, for men, about women, so bring all of your questions about getting and dealing with women here. Some anons on this site actually get laid, and some of those even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date women, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro.

>What is /htgwg/ not?
These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, volcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating women is hard today, and even harder for some, but /htgwg/ is for men trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, have given up, or insist that there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can pollute. BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM!

>How to ask for advice
Context is important: be more specific than "This girl ghosted me, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, this chick was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with the girl? How long have you known her? Any conversation screenshots? Etc... Don't forget to ask an actual question.

>Resources and Books
Wingman.live: https://wingman.live/ (AI dating coach)
"Models": https://pdfcoffee.com/318797392-mark-manson-models-2016pdf-4-pdf-free.html
"No More Mr Niceguy": https://archive.org/details/robert-glover-no-more-mr-nice-guy-id-353324692-size-612
Wingmam: https://www.youtube.com/@YourWingmam
Dr. NerdLove: https://www.doctornerdlove.com/blog/
Leykis 101: https://pastebin.com/7U5Sdhwq
https://fantasticanachronism.com/2025/03/20/how-to-be-good-at-dating/
(new suggestions with working links are welcome)

REMEMBER: It's good to read and prepare, but don't overdo it. Get off this site: go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual women in the real world.

Prev: >>33263842

Just be confident bro!

note to self: if a girl goes to the library to do schoolwork, she most likely wants to be approached, or at least is open to it. else she'd go home. c'mon man, you can do this...

>>33295904
lol wtf. Strange, but I wouldn't think anything of it. Do you leave a mess maybe? idk

>>33296140
>f a girl goes to the library to do schoolwork, she most likely wants to be approached, or at least is open to it
how do you know this?

>>33296150
I'm just telling that to myself to hype myself up. And it simply makes logical sense. Is it possible all these girls have incredibly noisy living situations and annoying roommates? Sure. Unlikely, however. Now, I'm not placing going to the library on the same tier as, say, going to a bar or concert in terms of willingness and desire to meet new people, after all they are still trying to get something done on their laptop, but the right guy (ie me) happens to be around and says hello? That possibility is part of why she'd go to the library, and she's aware of and welcoming of it. Ya feel?

>>33295953 (OP)
>How to Get Women
Why would you waste your time and money on something so vapid? Women have nothing to offer these days, but demand everything from you.

>>33296205
If you're not interested, feel free to go somewhere else, anon.

I got my phone from my mom when she upgraded, and I kept the light-pink case on it. Do you think girls think I'm gay when they see me with it in public?

>>33295953 (OP)
I was walking the dog the other day and a jewish girl was walking her two. She was around 22 and our dogs started playing and we talked a little bit and i got her instagram. This happened 5 days ago. Today she text me on IG asking me if i wanna join for the walk. I rejected her because i'm christian and she doesn't believe in God. I told her let's arrange another time because i got the flu. Based or cringe?

At what point do you consider yourself ghosted?

>>33296247
Why'd you get her instagram/info if you weren't planning on taking things further? Or did you not find out until you saw something on her IG? In any case, it's neither. If that kind of thing is important to you, then it's fair game for being a dating dealbreaker. But I'm not gonna commend you for it.

>>33296252
The morning of the next day from your attempt at contact.

>>33296252
when da ghost appears in your window and youre like oh shit a ghost

>>33296269
>YOU HAVE NOW BEEN... GHOSTED!

>>33296257
>Or did you not find out until you saw something on her IG?
Yeah that was the case, she is hot btw. Does anyone here have experience with jewish women?

>>33296252
Pay attention to her intiative. If you notice other guys getting an easier chance at going deeper on the iceberg as mentioned from said message below (please read the other message to get the reference) then you will see that your girl has had enough and wants to dig up instead of deeper. The deeper a girl is into you the more you can tell she likes you. That is a fact and if you don't believe me then you never know the love your parents have for you despite your rebellious phase in high school a long time ago.

>>33293044

Refer to the iceberg. For example you are at the second layer: good stranger. Your love probably at most was a fling and didn't go deeper. (Refer to the number I mentioned)

>>33295953 (OP)
no way do you think this is an attractive woman

>>33295953 (OP)
If you go to a random woman and say "Excuse me, I just thought that you're cute/pretty/gorgeous and wanted to talk to you and get to know you", what are the odds that she'll humor you?

>>33296349
not good

there's guys it works for, but they could have done better with something else. women get praise for their looks a lot and it doesn't move the needle

>>33296386
I see. How would you approach in that situation?

>>33296252
Left on seen for more than 5 hours while they're active on social media, most of the time I usually never message them again after that and surprise surprise that's also the point where it also all dies

>>33296612
Unfortunate, if they really wanted to message you, they'd make time for it.

>>33296239
Why dont you go up to one and ask. Seems like the perfect icebreaker. Many angles to get jokes out of it.

>>33296717
Precisely, I make it a point to never beg or grovel, and I won't lie, I've caught myself doing just that a few times. Women live on their phones, they have them at all times. It takes less than 30 seconds to check on someone, "I was busy" is bullshit

>>33296761
Yes, it's very annoying. It's almost like you have to be the one to push things forward, and the other person gives vague answers and compromises when she clearly doesn't care.

>>33296807
I've dated I think 12 girls in the last 9 months and only 3 of them reciprocated in terms of suggesting fun dates, paying for the occasional coffee or snack and making an effort in bed

For the others I planned/payed for everything, had to "lead" the whole thing and they basically just ate/drank whatever I bought, yapped all night and then starfished and ghosted lol.

Comically low effort in hindsight

Gonna forget dating for a while and focus on my own shit

>>33297069

>>33297080
haha you posted on the old thread when there was a new one, lmao

>>33297110
ehm ok

>>33297121
Seriously now, I don't have a gf so I can't tell you. All I've seen is people saying that you should be mindful of thing that make her mad or sad, because in that state it'll probably turn into excessive rage (probably directed to you for being there) or le big sad depression. Other than that, I guess usual stuff like having ready snacks or shit that she likes and being extra cuddly and comforting, or something like that.

>>33296931
12? How the fuck? From someone that only knows rejection, 12 within a year is some insane numbers

>>33297201
The thing is me. Just an endless barrage of accusations. and oooh I cant be with you anymore and shit like that

How do I get a black gf? I'm a nerdy white guy and I feel like they don't look at me for more than a second

>>33297244
Yes, yes, we read you on the previous thread.

>>33297244
get a nerdy gf thats black obviously.

>>33297226
I don't know what to tell you then man. You can either take it or have a serious conversation with her and tell her that despite the pre menstruation shit, she's going too far and you can't take it.

>>33297244
You're white, you have a boost with any nonwhite girl but that doesn't mean it's free, start applying yourself

>>33297244
I don't have experience when it comes to that, but I thought that black women were supposed to like white guys, and that the nerdy white boy type is somewhat liked as long as you're not avoidant or some other shit like that.

>>33293177
>Stop expecting reward.
Oh yeah I agree with this 100%. Changing my mindset from "I NEED HER NUMBER OR I WILL KILL MYSELF" to "I'm just a chill guy having a fun time and don't care about outcomes" has helped a lot.

This sounds autistic but I think about like Spike Spiegel or James Bond and try to embody that energy.

>>33297303
This is good advice, honestly wish I was stupider, my mind is a constant maelstrom of negative thoughts
>Has this ever worked before? When's the last time this worked, you're going to get rejected

>>33297206
I slept with half of them and more or less the entire process was stressful and anxiety provoking. It wasn't fun. I don't get a great deal of matches and most chats go nowhere, but if I get a date I tend to do alright because I'm tall and confident

It's still shit though, like I say almost all of them were mere passengers looking for casual sex / the next guy after me

>>33297369
So would you say you're coasting off your height? I'm 5'8' which is adverage at best and short at worst, so no free points for me

>>33297337
Believe me I'm the same.

For me I had to use alcohol as a catalyst at the start, but after that I've just been forcing myself to make it a habit.

The biggest hurdle is really just that initial sense of fear. Once you make talking to girls a habit and stop making it such a big thing in your head it helps a lot. The good news is it doesn't take long to desensitize yourself, I've been at it for like a month or two now, but you gotta keep meeting girls otherwise it's easy to get back in that fearful mode again. I even go talk to girls I'm not all that into.

What's great too is that most guys in our generation don't do this anymore because they're conditioned to use apps. So cold approach gives you an advantage.

>>33297388
I can talk to girls beyond easy, making female friends is autopilot, the mountain climb starts at making anything sexual. I friendzone myself constantly cause I'm overwhelmingly afraid of creeping a girl out, ending up on some IG story and losing my friends

>>33297284
She should know because she sends me 'menstruating angry gf' memes

>>33297431
She probably knows that her mood is affected, but I don't know if she notices how she makes you feel.

>>33297407
Example, some girl I knew had a story complaining about her top was made wrong and might show her tits, since I have 3 sisters I know about shit like this and started offering advice, unfortunately it felt like running into a wall, the mood shift was like a light switching off once I realized I creeped her out, I apologized, but things were never the same again, I essentially lost a friend just trying to help so imagine the blowback if I'm trying to hit on someone

>>33297407
Maybe watch some videos on escalation, and some old james bond movies. Anything before the Daniel Craig run because he has like zero charisma.

Also practice escalation of course.

Try to make the interaction sexual from the start. This doesn't have to be explicit, something as simple as a "Hey just wanted to say you look cute" when you approach immediately indicates you aren't trying to come to this woman as a friend.

>>33297377
Well presumably it helps but no, I'd get way more matches if my height mattered that much. I think I'm pretty good in person, I dress nicely and I can make people laugh and tease and escalate, I just have shit pics and probably come across as a potentially strange / boring person on the app. Basically I can't be fucked and don't understand how any of it is supposed to work so it just stresses me out, but once I get them in person I do alright

However I have decided it's basically pointless and I'm gonna forget it for a few months at least and focus on gym / other hobbies / just enjoying summer

>>33297481
>I think I'm pretty good in person, I dress nicely and I can make people laugh and tease and escalate, I just have shit pics and probably come across as a potentially strange / boring person on the app. Basically I can't be fucked and don't understand how any of it is supposed to work so it just stresses me out, but once I get them in person I do alright
Holy shit you're actually just like me besides the escalation, maybe I'm not as far gone as I thought

>>33297448
I'm in no position to give advice about this, but I honestly think that as long as you don't overdue it or act like a creep, you can be a bit of a "playful pervert". In your story about the top, maybe you could've said something like "oh, wouldn't it be a shame if that happened" or an exaggerated "I certainly wouldn't like to see that". A comment that's on the border between joke and flirting.

>>33297490
It's all about the pics and I have only one decent pic, which is a selfie. And you can't have more than one selfie as a man, even one is gay lol

It's such a retarded way to meet people

>>33295953 (OP)
How do I approach girls in class or at my university? Should I join more clubs, or is going up to someone and just striking up a conversation followed by a clear statement of interest in them cool? I just don't want to be thought of as creepy.

Girl I'm dating is out of town through next week. What do I do not to text her and seem pathetic while she's with family?

>>33298089
i think building rapport slowly is the best way, and letting the tension build

Gf and I are on a break anon here, I think you guys may have been right. It seemingly becomes more over every day. She recently removed the heart and my name she had on her instagram and she hasn't texted me for hours. I can still see her location, she invited me to go with her to visit her family on the 4th of july because "it would be weird if you weren't in the photos for one year", and we made out for like 5 mins and she said she loved me after we discussed the break. Idk what she wants from me or if she wants me, or what the hell is even going on. Maybe this is a shit test? Idk, I just don't know what to do. I've been with her for 5 years and it's been the best time of my life for the most part. Everyone will say that it was my fault and that I could've done something different, that I should've been engaged to her, moved in with her, etc. I wanted to do that, she was the one that was never ready and always had a reason not to. It's crazy how things can change so fast. It's like seeing a single drop of rain in the ocean causing a tsunami. Not even 3 weeks ago she got back home from vacation with her family and was all over me saying how much she missed me, touching me, smelling me etc, and that was because we hadn't seen each other in EIGHT DAYS and now she seemingly wants to break up lol. It makes no fucking sense

>>33298142
She seems crazy, I would break up with her, ghost her for a month to see if she still loves you, then you will know for sure, but you seem too attached and weak to do that.

>>33295953 (OP)
I hate the trout pout SO FUCKING MUCH

>>33298197
>She seems crazy
She is to an extent but this is by far the worst she has ever been and usually her craziness is inwards but the craziness this time is being projected outwards. She's going through a lot of familial and personal stuff rn
>but you seem too attached and weak to do that
I can ghost her for a month, that's no problem, I just have to not send a text. The only problem is that what if she thinks I'm not interested in her anymore? We told each other that we love each other so I feel like ghosting her would just kill that, unless I'm mistaken

>>33296011
this, but literally, not with blackpill retardation

>late 20s careercel
>haven't had sex in 4 years
>finally grow tired of inceldom and gooning every night
>just start taking crazy shots with women I don't think I have a chance with
>at walmart, at the post office, in bars, while pumping gas
>no woman is safe from being hit on
>start getting phone numbers
>slowly learn what you say isn't even half as important as how you say it
>just ask for nudes and half the time it fucking works or she gives it up after a bit more complimenting and flirting
>have a date on friday
>have two lined up for saturday, the hotter one will probably cancel but I have a backup

>it was this easy all along and all I had to do was stop being scared and try a bit
>wonder if this applies to everything else in my life too

I..I think I might just make it lads.

>>33298235
She is either seeing another man right now or is actively pursuing another man. You are her safety net.

>>33298324
Take my updoot, stranger!

>>33295953 (OP)
I had an idea of hiring a sugar baby to be a wing women for me and help me seduce other women. Good idea? I made it with crypto so money isn't an issue. I'm going off the idea that women will hook up with guys if other women vouch for them or have her befriend them and then she spontaneously pushs the idea for a random threesome

>>33298110
But I don't want to be friendzoned. I feel like not hiding my intentions is good. I don't mean I'm going to say "I'm gonna fuck you," but I should at least hint that I find her attractive, no?

>>33298568
Honestly not the craziest idea, but certainly an expensive one

im paying for one night with someone today. she seems nice and cute and i mostly want to destress and declutter and cuddle and maybe blow some loads. she seems clean and takes care of herself, too. my biggest worries are not having a good time, or her also not having a good time. the worst thing that can happen is we don't actually enjoy sleeping together.

I probably shouldn't be too anxious as effectively im supposed to have a good time given that im paying for it, but what do you have to say about this?

p.s. im not a virgin but i havent really enjoyed sex with the ones i did have sex with. maybe this time itll be better.

p.p.s. ive had no time or energy to really try to get in a woman's pants in the conventional way recently so this is sort of my way of fast-tracking to the part that I can look forward to enjoying.

Living is a requirement, but being loved and liked, or in some cases being respected, is not.

Need help...

I've been told I'm very good looking, I get stared at by girls and guys(confirmed by friends who notice it too). However I choke when talking to girls. I've tried various techniques and noticed some improvements but it's so hard to improve when I keep seeing very good looking girls with ugly browns.

I've yet to date and I'm 33. But people get surprised when I twll them how old I am and assume I'm in my early 20s...

How do I harness the pros that I have? The only women I have hooked up with were over 45 yrs old. I think there's also an issue of younger women being anxious around guts they find very attractive.

>>33298711
i think when talking to girls, you have to understand that sometimes when they dont talk to you or seem uninterested, its not always about you. (maybe theyre preoccupied or tired or too adhd-riddled to hold a conversation). in that way you're able to let go of what happens as a result, and you just try to be friendly and curious
>how are you doing today?
>oh yeah it's been rough for me too, but that's life we've been doing well so far
>have you been looking forward to anything lately?
>oh that's interesting i don't know about that, i've heard about that before but haven't really gotten into it
>what do you do for work?
>oh you're an X, i've heard some horror stories about them, care to tell some if you have any?
it's just a conversation

>>33298711
Talk to them as if they were just people, anon. Don't put pressure on yourself to preform. Just be you, and don't try to trick them or convince them. Just be yourself, and if they like you, they'll stay for more.

>>33297448
you don't explicitly talk about tits popping out until you're fucking

literally everything before that is just implications and tension

>>33298788
>>33298742
I'm pretty decent at talking to coworkers. I basically treat them like they are a friend or even a sibling. But it doesn't go anywhere and they eventually act cold after they are flirting.

>>33298814
>coworkers
while I have a crush on a coworker and want to get intimate with her, you gotta remember that people at work are usually there to work. not to flirt. talking and having a nice conversation with coworkers is fine and alleviates some stress, but flirting? can possibly cause more stress and even drama. not a good thing at work

>>33298812
Yeah but I never had any sexual or escalation intentions, it was literally "oh shit I actually know how to fix that, lemme help" and it blows up in my face

>>33298568
>>33298636
how much do you need to do this?

I'm so frustrated with dating
I always seem to choose the wrong dialogue option or behavior

dozens of matches over the past few weeks wasted
many people blocking me

in person as well, I've met like 5-10 girls over the past couple of weeks and no one showed any signs of interest
it's really hard out here guys
I even have a good job and my looks are passable.

the feeling of not getting girls is so miserable

>>33298142
Gives cheating vibes bro.

Can an introverted man in his early 30s get a gf if he just continues to live his life normally? I work remotely in IT (Team Lead), visit language courses and a gym. Board games occasionally. Don't have friends, only aquintances, but have no problem communicating. Doing well financially. Have my own flat. But lately got very nervous about my future. Afraid I'll still be alone in my 40s. Feel like I'm doing something wrong with my life. Feel myself broken in a "not functioning normally" way.

Is it enough? Will I eventually find a gf? Should I really worry?

>>33299272
I'm gonna copy your post and I want you to read it as if someone else wrote it while keeping in mind the question of, "where can this guy meet women,"
>I work remotely in IT (Team Lead), visit language courses and a gym. Board games occasionally. Don't have friends, only aquintances, but have no problem communicating. Doing well financially. Have my own flat.

zero opportunities, no? Unless you get good at approaching women at the gym, I guess. Anyway, yeah, something's gotta change.

>>33296252
I'd take ghosting over talking but declining every invitation to go out. Technically speaking, I'm doing the ghosting right now

>>33298324
Give an example on how you would shoot your shot anon. I need to escape too...

>>33298239
cope

>approached girl at bus-stop who'd been smiling at me for weeks
>goes horribly
>still get anxious and cringe thinking about it
:(

I honestly feel that unless getting girls is your passion it's really hard to achieve success by just being "normal"

I must brainwash myself into making cold approach and picking up girls my passion

>>33300467
Kek

So why did she smile, if she apparently wasn't interested in you? Or was she interested, but you blew it? What went wrong?

>>33299040
What are you talking about with your dates? Who is leading the conversation?

>>33300511
>Or was she interested, but you blew it? What went wrong?
I was awful, and worse, I had a semi-panic attack on the bus ride home when she was on it, basically talking to myself. Ugh. Maybe she thought I was singing to the music I was listening to :(

>>33300520
So you blew it. Lmao
Next time don't shit your pants when you approach a woman. Remember they are human just like you. No need to panic.

>>33300529
Well, it's because I misheard a question she asked and I answered with something stupid and by then the bus pulled up.

>>33300529
>>33300537
And yes, I've been avoiding that stop at that exact time since, lmao

I know, I know, it's just one girl, and I didn't even know her, it's more me I'm cringing at

>>33300537
>>33300539
Kek.
Shit happens sometimes. It's a funny story, but nothing to worry about. You'll be successful next time ... Maybe. xD

>>33298107
Fuck she texted me, now I have to decide if I want to reply instantly because I miss her or play it off.

>>33300887
Send her a dic-pic. No text, no Smileys, no elaboration.

>>33300887
Peach emoji, water emoji, eggplant emoji and fire emoji. You're welcome, use protection.

>>33300895
>>33300950
really unfuny and why you're single

>>33300975
The only unfunny thing here is your lack of humor

I just want to say that I appreciate these threads and all the anons who aren't doomer incel faggots who just tell you to give up

I'm 30 and very into older women. How can I find 45-55 year olds that are dtf and not looking for marriage like all the desperate 30 year old women scrambling to have kids last minute.

>>33301258
You'd enjoy atoga then.

>>33301374
yeah, generals are the last hope of this shit board, somehow they mostly repel all the le epic deep cynical fags

>>33301374
atoga is just men talking and gooning to the idea of talking to a woman (on 4channel.org lmao)

>>33301304
Several milfs who are friends with my mother are interested in me

>>33301464
Ever make a move? I live away from parents

>>33301304
>how do I shoot fish in a barrel
You're hooking up with women who are past their prime and have lower smv. If you look OK just go on an app and widen your age range.

How do you ask a girl out? What do you say? How do you approach? I am autistic and need examples

>>33301501
I mean I'm on tinder and bumble, but I do a lot better in person. Just not quite sure where to meet/find the women I'm after

>>33301662
dive bar on a weeknight

I only attract old women and fat girls who come to me wanting my attention

Why can't it be young skinny girls?

>>33301615

>>33296205
>Why would you waste your time and money on something so vapid?
because i desperately want a family and i can't do that without a woman

>>33301662
nice area go to bars on slow nights. find divorced or unmaried roasties. I've even had the chance and I'm fat and ugly

>>33296205
enjoy dying alone

This is gonna piss a lot of people off, but if you swallow this pill your life will be better. Unfortunately you all, due to how the rules of the dating game are, if you have trouble reading social cues not knowing signs of a girl liking you but is too shy, you may have to chalk it up and accept that this crush you have is not assertive enough to admit her love to you. Too often there are men who can't accept this fact getting themselves in trouble with the law. I get it too, she is just too damm shy to open up, but like how you have to be assertive, she does too, and if she can't be assertive, oh well find another love. Date a woman who is at least somewhat assertive about her love to you, not play the guessing game with women who you can never know.

>>33301669
Got it, I'll try that out

>>33301788
what's a roastie

>>33296193
Never thought about it this way, but makes sense to me. Even if it isn't the case, it's a good way to get confidence.

>>33296011
I saw a dude who looked like this with a 5' goth baddie. I got to talking to the bloke and he was pretty funny.
Moral of the story is learn to be funnier.

>>33297407
>I can talk to girls beyond easy, making female friends is autopilot, the mountain climb starts at making anything sexual.
You just send it. You need to show proper interest pretty early otherwise you shot at scoring exponentially decreases over time.

Should I remove the self help books from my bookshelf?
Are those kind of books a red flag for women?

>>33302186
>Should I remove the self help books from my bookshelf?
>Are those kind of books a red flag for women?
Depends who the author is. Shit like Atomic Habbits or Hyperfocus are okay, but if you own Jordan Peterson or like The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck - then just bin them.

>>33295953 (OP)
Any other anons have the norwood reaper come for you at an early age and been invisible ever since?

i was 22 when i went bald, im 29 now.

>>33302252
You should have made sure you have a shiny head. Bitches love a shiny head.

>>33302203
Okay removed those and some other questionable ones
Thanks

I think it's funny that every dating app just nukes photos if it has a gun in it. I fucking won a comp, have a nice photo of myself by a professional photographer at the event with said award and rifle and I can't even showcase it.

"Pick a photo that shows your best self" my fucking ass, fucking cunts. God forbid I get to showcase that I have passion for my hobby and skills.

>>33302254
i go clean shaven head, liable to make people blind i am!

>>33302252
being bald is not the end of the world. i have a friend who has been bald since he was 19, he's had more escapades than any other person I've known.

>>33302264
AI-shop the gun into something else? A trophy?

Is going to a bar in the US to meet women any different than it is in the UK? I feel going to bars to talk to girls isn't really a thing here as it is across the pond.

>>33302307
Not worth it, they zap photos with that shit too. I just cropped it a fuck ton instead. Pisses me off because my friends and I took all 3 top spots and it's a great photo of us.

>>33302072
>what's a roastie
newfag

Where/how do I "put myself out there"? Dead serious.

>>33302978
You can start by just randomly talking to strangers, anon, male and female. Make more friends and acquaintances. Go out and go to parties and other events with them, and you will eventually meet women at those places, and honestly? Just shoot your shot in public as well. You like that cashier? Tell her you would like to get her number and take her out sometime. Don't catcall, but always be making conversation with literally anyone. You don't even know about that time I had to pursue a search and rescue operation with a group of homeless dudes because their friend jimmy was high as fuck and had run off. That's the kind of adventure you can talk about on dates too, anon.

>>33299913
literally just say anything. that was the big hurdle to get over. I never open by directly hitting on them, just strike up a conversation and go from there. but it's literally all just being willing to open your mouth and say something instead of keeping it shut.
it honestly works best when I have less than 3 seconds to come up with something and just say whatever I think of first

>I like that water bottle
>that looks good where'd you get that
>what the hell is that?? (girl sitting alone at a table eating something)
>everyone decides to show up here at the same time huh (at post office)

just smile and be friendly maintain eye contact and maybe flirt a bit and I'd say most any woman will at least entertain conversation for a few minutes. you just read their responses and body language and decide if they're just being polite if they find you attractive too. it's not rocket surgery.

Reminder that
>be confident
>go outside
>just be yourself
Are all cliched sayings that are never actually uttered by people who have gotten women successfully.
Further reminder that most of the "regular dudes who were just funny and confident bro" are in oofy doofy modern relationships and that is one of the three women they will ever fuck in their lifetimes.

Low body fat and being up to date in the current cultural zeitgeist. For 2025 that means either Safe Sleazy icuckzzz style or tiktok ultra nigger.
That's it, and if you don't have them you're fucked.

>>33302313
>Is going to a bar in the US to meet women any different than it is in the UK?
It's much worse in the US than in the UK or Europe.
Bars and clubs have mostly become places to take girls, not to meet girls. If girls want dick they have a million options on their phones.
The ubiquitous smartphone and its consequences have been a disaster for western birth rates. If he were not already rotting down there, Steven Jobs would deserve to go to Hell for the iPhone alone.

>>33303057
I don't have the kind of resting face that can initiate that kind of conversation, and my smile is...not great. Anything better than trying to strike up random conversations with total strangers?

>>33298324
>>33299913
He's making shit up
No one decides to "just stop being an incel" and suddenly
For reference, I'm 6'2", visibly muscly (as in people call me "buff", "jacked," etc). I've had girlfriends in the past, I just got out of a relationship a few months ago with a girl I met on Hinge.
I did literally a hundred cold approaches last year and got maybe two or three dates, all with women WAY below my league, none of which even went anywhere.
Meanwhile a month on Hinge doubled my bodycount (not that it was very high to begin with) and a short relationship with the hottest girl I've ever been with up until now.
Because women know how to get dick if they want it, being a charming stranger worked like 20 years ago but now no one cares. I guarantee you I mog that anon in ever aspect but noting happened for me when I tried cold approaching.
What his purpose is, I don't know. I'd say he's just handsome and underestimating himself but handsome and well-adjusted people women are attracted to don't exist on 4chan especially not in /htgwg/. So he's just lying.

>>33303183
No one decides to "just stop being an incel" and suddenly cold-approaches their way into being gigaChad*

I'm a Catholic guy who likes tomboys and is going to go to a Christian college. In my experience, Christian tomboys don't want to look like tomboys anymore because of the gays. I'm not against dating outside of my religion, but I am too passionate and flippant when talking about my religious beliefs for a marriage to work out if the girl doesn't agree with me. I'm willing to date any girl regardless of how attracted to her I am, but I can't handle a long term relationship with a girl with long hair (long story).

How likely do you guys think it is for a Christian woman to be willing to cut her hair after 3-6 months of dating?
Do most women care enough about what their boyfriend's think about their appearance to make a change in that time frame?
Am I better off not trying to date Christian women and just trying to find a tomboy and then convert her?

for extra information, by 'short hair' I am including undercuts and some bobs. while they aren't my favorite, they do stop the depression from kicking in, so I can't complain.

Also, I have been told by many people (including my previous girlfriend) that I'm attractive, smart, caring, confident etc. While I don't think I'm above average in looks, I often get upset at other people not treating their gf/bf like they should, so I can believe I'm above-average in those areas. Just in case me being good in those areas might change the situation.

>>33303142
What's wrong with your resting face?

>>33303142
It doesn't matter what kind of resting face you have or what smile. You can fake both of them until they become your default.

>>33303193
Pissed off. I got really deep-set eyes and my brows are furrowed. I look grouchy all the time. Doesn't help that a lifetime of combat sports has given me a very aggressive tone and set of mannerisms.
>>33303198
My teeth are fucked. That's not something I can fake my way out of.

>>33303205
Do you have good features?

>>33303215
I'm slow to call myself good-looking. I got a strong jawline and a nice voice, but that's all I got I think.

>>33303218
Can you show teeth or how fucked

>>33303142
I have had a lot of success with starting conversations with acquaintances and slowly befriending the girls a bit first. If you have a decent personality, it's much easier to pull girls who get to see who you are and how you behave a bit before you officially ask them out.

Basically, play to your strengths, learn how to socialize and give compliments (good flirting is just giving good compliments), and maybe work on your appearance a bit. If you are going to 4chan to learn how to get women, chances are you need to put in some work. It's not hopeless, it just takes some time and effort

>>33303221
Yellowed with pronounced cavities. I'm very insecure about them.
>>33303224
I dunno, it seems a task insurmountable. I don't drink, and that seems like the only thing people do in my neck of the woods.

>>33303205
>My teeth are fucked. That's not something I can fake my way out of.
It's also not a deal breaker with the right girl. If you think that's going to be a deal breaker with any woman ever, then you might as well kill yourself now because you aren't going to hide that by not smiling.

>>33303227
Pronounced in the front? How bad tho

>>33303235
Yes. I see them whenever I do smile, which is uncommon as is.

>>33303227
where about do you live? (just to see if I have any ideas of how to meet girls)

>>33303192
My fellow brother in Christ, I would seriously consider if imposing your vain and superficial desires on a woman who is God's daughter, is in line with what Jesus would have taught.

But in all seriousness, hair is a BIG thing for women, way bigger than for dudes. It's unlikely they'll change it drastically for you. I've asked several of my past GFs to do the same because I also like a good pixie cut on a girl but none of them would do it. Also remember most girls chop their hair out of trauma response, out of all the girl's I've ever known with super short hair most of them were abused in one form or another, or in the military which is just as bad.
Ultimately you're gonna have to get over your weird fetish and just find a normal girl to date. If you're lucky she might cut her hair short after menopause, because it will get in the way of all the fucking she's gonna want to do after pregnancy isn't a thing anymore (why do you think the "Karen cut" is a thing for middle aged women lol).
Also remember it is forbidden for Catholics to marry non-Catholics without dispensation from a cardinal. Just find a nice Catholic girl, get married, and make babies.

>>33303244
Vaguely in the midwest. Think North Dakota, Montana, Wyoming, Saskatchewan.

>>33303262
Rodeos or football games. Or McDonalds

>>33303245
Not to be pedantic, but its the bishop not necessarily a Cardinal (either way, your point is made). I don't want to marry a non-Catholic, but it could be worth me talking to some girls and potentially being able to sway them (though this seems like a bad idea to me)

I know that it seems like a fetish (which it probably is to some extent), but its not quite as simply as that. I'd be fine if all I had to deal with was an imperfectly attractive woman (i.e. all of them). The problem I have is that when a girl I'm dating shows me affection, if she has long hair I frequently get some really bad depressive thoughts. I've gone to therapy, and brought up my attraction and fixation to long hair. what I've gotten is how to deal with these thoughts when they come up, but not how to prevent them. even if its only for a few seconds, frequently hearing my brain say "kill yourself, you pervert" isn't pleasant. I'm more than happy to not date a girl who's outside of my 'type', but I can't handle years worth of suicidal thoughts. I want for them to stop and for me to be able to marry a normal looking girl, but I haven't been able to stop the intrusive thoughts (I managed to remove my general insecurity, just not the intrusive thoughts).

>>33303262
Do they have any sort of dancing out there? I live on the East coast and there are occasionally "English Country Dances." its a good way to meet girls imo, and it can help with socializing and confidence.

If that doesn't work, churches can also be places where you socialize (if you are religious), and your personality and character will mean more to more girls who regularly attend church.

>>33303297
Not that I know of. I also REALLY don't have the social confidence to do those. Wallflower is an understatement, I'm more like a full-on root vegetable with walls.

>>33303304
If you don't have a whole lot of social confidence, I would recommend just trying to make friends at first. Gain some confidence (even if its only with dudes if thats what you need at first), trust yourself, then try to attract women. You can't attract any worthwhile woman if you don't think you are worthwhile. so take a bit of time to work on yourself, then try going after girls (or do both and really try to focus on presenting yourself as confident and a valuable person)

>>33303297
>churches can also be places where you socialize (if you are religious), and your personality and character will mean more to more girls who regularly attend church
Church girls are still girls and they can smell it if you're just there to find a woman and will reject you hard for it.
I go to a very trad parish and the serious cradle Catholics are very very suspicious of converts and reverts. You will be in competition with men who went to the same homeschool groups as them and have decades of proving their bona fides as one of the faithful.
>>33303279
You need to deal with whatever childhood trauma gave you this problem, and actually putting the work in. Just because you believe in God and Christ doesn't give you an excuse to be a fatalist in your personal life.
I'm telling you, most girls would not cut their hair short for you, and you don't want the ones that would.

Despite getting lots of matches, hardly anything leads to dates, I've tried everything from asking questions based on their profiles, tried getting them to talk about themselves, I'm not good with humor unless it's dad jokes type Seinfeld humor. I've tried going for the aggressive approach with giving them my number to even texting a few days before arranging a day to meetup for a date.

Am I cooked?

>>33303338
>You need to deal with whatever childhood trauma gave you this problem, and actually putting the work in.
I am trying to. The problem ultimately is related to all of the gay stuff online surrounding tomboys. that mixed with most girls I knew in highschool bulling either me, girls who had short hair, or the idea of girls having short hair. I've gone to therapy and learned cbt. I have grown confident enough in myself that I don't need a girl validate my feelings and taste. The problem I am experiencing is intrusive thoughts. I don't know how to stop them intruding on sweet situations. I don't want to sound argumentative, because I agree that a girl's appearance shouldn't matter this much. I know how to deal with and prevent general depressive thoughts, but I don't know how to prevent intrusive thoughts, only deal with them. The problem is that they still show up.

I'm not a fatalist, I've just grown pessimistic when it comes to this subject. I sought help professionally (with two different therapists), I've looked up online how to help deal with intrusive thoughts, I resolved my depression and I've mostly resolved my anxiety. I just don't know how to resolve thoughts that I never wanted in the first place, thoughts that aren't normal depressive thoughts, thoughts that only come up in one circumstance.

>most girls would not cut their hair short for you, and you don't want the ones that would

I agree. I'm doing my best to not loose hope, but I'm not sure what else I can do. My only thought is potentially praying more. I also have only recently been able to quite porn (been clean for about a week). I've heard from friends that quitting porn can help with unrealistic beauty standards. Hopefully with time I can get over this? idk. I'm willing to put in the work, I just don't know what else I can do. If you have a suggestion of what "putting in the work" means, I'm more than happy to take it.

>>33303387
Dude I have the same problem. I can even get girls to to sext and send me nudes no problem but getting them to meet up is like pulling teeth.

>>33303437

I had some Moldovan 20 yr old with daddy issues send me nudes and we did some roleplaying, that was the most 'action' I got in a long time last year.

>>33303551
It's fucking annoying, I think they just use us like how guys use porn. They like the fantasy.

>>33303608
Yes. You're being farmed for validation. She wants you to tell her how hot she is and how pink and tight her pussy looks, feeds off of your compliments, and then whisks off to feed somewhere else.

>>33303648
I used to weigh 300 pounds and just recently got attractive so all this shit is new to me.

>>33301720
LOL. Psychologists created a disaster.

I met this cute Asian on hinge but she's on a trip rn and she's coming back in a month, we've been texting everyday and plan to go on a date when she gets back, how do I not fuck this up in the meantime?

>>33303752
I hate to say it but a month is pretty much unrecoverable. She's 100% just swiping and talking to you because she's a boring person who can't even be distracted by a vacation.
I actually think using text game for a week or two before a meetup (if you can't meet sooner) is better than what the CLUELESS AUTISTS here suggest which is to basically ghost the chick between scheduling the date and meeting up (hint: if you are a goofy autist this does not make you look busy or mysterious, it makes you look like you're desperate to hook up without actually making a connection. This move works for Chad because he is Chad). But a month is far too long to chat with a stranger when there are more attractive and more interesting strangers who come along.
If you want to keep this alive, just let the conversation flow naturally and give breaks of days or maybe weeks between messages, but keep them going. Not daily conversations like some orbiter, but also not going completely ghost and messaging her at the end of her trip being like "Hey, remember me? Still want to meet for a date, GU-HUH?" (She will read that in Goofy's voice because that's what you sound like to her asking this after ghosting her for a month).
Keep swiping and build a roster of cute Asian girls you are talking to, dating apps are a numbers game. If you're a regular ass dude you might need to go through 20 or 30 matches and like half a dozen shitty dates before you even get to a decent date with a nice girl (let alone bagging her as your GF).

Pls give me advice, do not deter me from doing what I want to do. Anyways, I want to get back with my ex, she's been going through therapy for the last year. I love her so much and we've been spending more time together recently. How do I ask her out? I don't want to fuck this up

>>33303824
I mean, I'm still talking to a couple other girls as well but this Asian one is the one I have the best connection with since we talked about both wanting a long term relationship. She's across the world so we just say good morning and good night and talking fairly naturally from there

>>33303841
Literally just ask her, retard. You know her, not us, but be aware that you aren't going back to the way things were. You're starting over, and that means you put your best foot forward this time and make sure you both communicate. Depending on what kind of girl she is, if you just tell her to go with you somewhere, you can get an emotional moment going and all you have to do is take advantage of that moment to plant one right on her. If you can't do that, are you really a man?

Reminder that the modern women has been over 100 years in the making and you are NOT fixing it by "just being more confident bro"
Pic related is a "flapper" from the 1920s showing off a great new invention to a crowd of (beta male) adorers: the mini-skirt

>>33303855
Well just keep doing what you're doing, if you think there's a strong connection
Just don't get hung up because again she could match with Mr. Perfect two days before she gets back, and then your ass is out.

>>33303858
I'm aware that I'm starting over. I have no idea (for the most part) what she's been doing during this time. She's a good girl, she was just so fucked, pretty sure she has BPD. I know she tried killing herself when she was 18, we met at 20, but we dated for a long long time and I still see her parents every now and again in public and say hello. I can try taking her somewhere and hopefully that will set the mood, I'm just not sure where yet

>>33303886
Alright, thanks. Honestly I don't have tooo much hope cause disappointment is to be expected from dating.

>>33303898
You know her best, anon. Make sure to get her alone when you go for it. I believe in you.

>>33303901
Kinda wild, isn't it? Not one generation ago dating was supposed to be fun and happy. I remember when I was in college 15 years ago things weren't nearly this bad. Hooking up or asking a girl out was soooo easy but then everyone got a fucking iPhone and then Tinder, Instagram, Onlyfans, etc. and now like 80% of women walk around like they're celebrities, even the fat busted ones. ESPECIALLY the fat busted ones
The circlejerk hugboxers ITT ignore the blackpill stuff because they can't argue against it - women are mentally fucked, they were never meant to be given this much choice

>>33303949
I was alive back then, anon. Dating was just as shitty in so many other ways.

>>33302088
Now you're gettin' it :D

>>33303965
>I was alive back then, anon
Being 10 and "dating" by holding hands doesn't count LMAO

I miss her so much but I want her to get better. I’ve known her since we were 12. That’s more than half my life and during that entire time we were thinking about each other or dating. I guess we’ve just gone back to thinking about each other again until she can get the psychiatric help that she needs

How about I start wearing clothes that has my # on the back with instructions for any girl to hit me up, think that'll work?

>>33304598
Yes. Don't forget to be 6'3'' and shredded though

>>33304598
It'll probably draw attention, but like most of the times, girls won't take the initiative.

Still really pissed about yesterday.
First I did laundry. Girl in the laundry room. I ignored her when I came in there. After a while she asked me for help. She wasn't hitting on me. She was clearly not interested in me. Anyway really the whole time she looked at me with disgust. But especially when I started talking to her when she came back later, about some stuff in the laundry room. Some girls that were prettier than her seemed to like me the day before, and I didn't think she was very attractive, so I didn't care.

But then later yesterday I was downtown. Went into a coffee shop to order something and the barista girl was giggling. Pretty sure she was giggling at me for my long hair and long beard. I said thank you but regretted it afterwards. Didn't really care at the time but later when I thought about it it pissed me off.

I was downtown to do daygame. Later I went to one of my regular daygame spots. Just as I'm entering that place a tourist girl is hitting on a tourist guy, and it seemed to be her initiative, seemed like she asked him to take photos of her with her camera, and then started asking him questions and being very flirty. That pissed me off because girls never do this to me. Something similar happened maybe once in my life, a girl asked me to take photos of her, don't remember if she asked questions, I got a date with her but no sex. Anyway women basically never approach me and never hit on me. It really pissed me off.

I tried not to care, I've had dates with prettier girls than her I think, didn't look at her much though so I'm not sure.

But the 4th girl was what ruined my day and what I'm still pissed off about. Shortly after passing the girl that was hitting on a guy I saw a girl sitting alone on a bench, in the same area kind of. I sat down next to her and ran an opener about the weather. She totally ignored me. Didn't look at me, didn't say a word back.

It's fucking unfair.

>>33304673
Anyway I think girls seem to show less interest in me since I grew my hair and beard long. I think I will go to a barber, maybe today. But I don't know which style to get. I remember before my hair was long enough for a ponytail it was pretty annoying when it was windy, I had to use a lot of gel which I didn't like, and even with a lot of gel it got roughed up by the wind and got into my face and eyes. Not sure I want to cut it just long enough for a ponytail either because that's how I cut it a year ago, feel like doing something new. I don't want to cut it really short either, and don't want to cut it myself.

>>33304673
1. Stop being a fucking bitch.
2. If you want women to approach you get shredded and go to places where you take off your shirt like the beach and festivals.
>>33304688
What's your face shape and hair type.

>>33304697
fuck off retard

>>33304673
Sorry anon. You'll find someone.

>I sat down next to her and ran an opener about the weather.
What did you say

>>33304809
I don't have very much success, or I do, depending on how you look at it. I haven't gotten laid since 2023. Only got one lay in 2023 and only got one in 2022 too. No lay 2024. But I got 6 dates and a few makeouts in 2024. Got 1 date per 8.5 approaches last year which I think is good, even though I had sex with none of them, was very close with one though, but made a mistake, otherwise it would have been sex with her. Also this year I got a date after just 3 approaches, young and pretty girl. Have done 7 approaches in total this year, one date, which is a good success rate.

>>33304846
Do you have a usual approach?

>>33304993
Lately it's been mostly girls who are sitting on benches, some that are standing still too, but I think maybe I'll start approaching walking girls too again.

>>33305022
lol I meant what do you say

>>33301774
Do it with a man and adopt

>>33304101
I'm older than you, kid.

>Did you want validation!? That after what you did and all this time, I still like you anyway? Congratulations, you got it.
I'm slowly becoming the heartbreaking Chad manipulator I was always meant to be bros. We're back together now. And I'm gonna break her heart again in the future. Lel.

So there's this scammer that keeps calling me again and again with some garbage about mortgages. Today I've decided I'll ask her out for a coffee, she got really upset, said something like "this is not the purpose of this conversation" and hang up. What did I do wrong? She keeps calling me all the time she must be interested.

>>33305471
Pay attention, son. Whats behind your joy? You may act edgy, but you are not indifferent. You have abysmal self esteem and some trauma loops

Instead of spreading the damage to other people, you should heal

You will agree with me naturally in 10 years, I had your worldview a decade ago when I uncovered my charm and sexual energy

I regretted it, because the way you are going is trauma reinforcing, not trauma healing. You do need the edge and power. However sooner or later you will meet an ideal woman and lose her, because chad manipulation is all you can do, and it doesnt work past 6-12 years on high level women

>>33303841
Horrible idea. She is changing, you are not. Exes work second time only on single condition: both men and woman took relationship as a mirror and evolved at the same speed past the old dynamics

>>33303752
You fucked up already, you are talking daily like gay boyfriend. There is no mystery, no challenge. If she is not coming FOR YOU with 8 out of 10 desire or higher you are blinded by your emotions

>>33305767
I love it when little bro tries to act like some older and wiser man
Because if he really was twice the age of the average poster here, that would be fucking embarrassing
>There is no mystery, no challenge.
LMAO you and the other guy are not fucking Christian Grey. You are not mysterious, you're gonna just look like a scrub who wants to smash
When I was using Hinge I was adding roughly a body a week, and those girls all enjoyed a little bit of conversation.
Now I know you're going to twist my words around and say that I'm implying you should be some sort of gay texting buddy (because you have no idea what you're doing), but that's not what I said. I said "a little bit of conversation" so you don't just show up in front of her door on date night like the Driver (again, you are not Ryan Gosling, you are not Bruce Wayne, you are a nigga working at Pizza Hut that uses 4chan, you have no mystery).
> If she is not coming FOR YOU with 8 out of 10 desire or higher you are blinded by your emotions
You get this 10, maybe 15 times in your life if you're just an ordinary dude and don't have wealth or true God-tier genetics. Waiting for this every time you go looking for poon is asking for multi-year dry spells.

>>33305471
Anon, revenge like that isn't winning. If you really want to be with her until you get tired and over it, then fine. Do that, but don't ask her back out just to fuck with her. That's not healthy for you. Learn to forgive.

>>33305471
>That after what you did and all this time, I still like you anyway? Congratulations, you got it.
>We're back together now.
You are weak. You could cuck her in the most brutal way by having an orgy with all her hottest friends, and you would still have lost.

How do you ask a girl out? What do you say and what do you do? How do you approach? I am autistic and need examples. What do women find charismatic and attractive?

>>33303691
nta but also autistic, what do you mean created a disaster? is it bad advice?

>>33306021
>Are you free for drinks saturday?
Works every time.

>mom is a narc, dad is a wuss
>get yelled at, blamed for saying the wrong thing or not saying the right thing
>no advice with girls other than lose weight and be nice


How the hell to I talk to girls? I've dealt with most of the self esteem issues, but I grew up with an environment where saying the wrong thing would hurt women so bad they would have no choice but to scream at me. "Be yourself" just means act like a whipped dog to me.

A girl will smile at me and I'll just bluescreen. I try to ask advice and it's never anything relevant. I AM being my fucking self, I don't hate myself, I don't care if the man tricked me into wanting women, none of that is helpful to me. I'm not ugly and when I take better care of myself I still can't think of how to go from friendly acquaintances to a couple.
I'm middle aged and it isn't getting better. I've had sex and one relationship a few times with women I met on the internet which was great but intermittent and I want to be able to approach women and maybe have it go well.

How do I get better? I have no idea where to start.

>>33305886
You are confusing natural mystery and challenge with games. Games don't work on better women, especially through phone. Because they are natural black belts in it. What I mean, if that guy would have a busy successful life and other options, he would be naturally unavailable to chat with someone thousands of kilometers away. So his silence would be productive mysterious and challenging enough to invite pursuit

>little bit of conversation
It wasnt talking daily for a woman you havent slept yet for a month, was it? Connection for women is how you make them feel, not how frequently you communicate. You are correct that you should talk a little, but original post was extreme. Feeding daily validation to someone you havent slept with screams to female biology - this guy doesnt value his time and has no women. Millions of years of evolution, I didnt design it

>working at Pizza Hut, you have no mystery
Mystery for women is not how deep you are, otherwise Stephen Hawking would be drowning in vagina lubricant. Its mot information. Its how you make them feel. Have you ever wondered how low iq prisoners, drug addicts and low life scum can magically attract women? Women emotions are not based on your logic. Mystery is not - I wonder what is his favorite sci manga is. It is - I cannot predict what he will do, how he feels about me and why is he like this

You can try it out on the next date. Skip all personal questions about yourself and just be present in the moment. Talk about whats in front of you, not whats outside of the situation. Despite knowing how deep your world is she will be wet as a niagara, ever anxious female nervous system loves that, and she will later think about you all the time trying to understand what is going on in your head

>ordinary dude and don't have wealth or true God-tier genetics
This is your learned limiting belief. Women are super attentive to character, and that beats the rest. Bezos got dumped, Brady got cheated on, etc

>asked her on a "date" last tuesday
>said she didn't have time that week, but she could this week
>asked her on thursday if she wanted just coffee "date" or dinner, she said dinner. She said thursday or friday this week was good and she would come back to me which day
>it is now wednesday evening and i haven't heard from her
Did I fuck up?
I'm not getting a date I think

>>33306108
When this happens I just leave it and start talking to the next girl.

>>33306136
There is no next girl. At least not this year. I spent all my social energy to ask this one out

>>33306146
This dating stuff is a numbers game man. You can't expect to hit bullseye in 1 hit. Stop getting so invested before you even meet them.

>>33306108
Dump her. When they start with this date shuffling bullshit, most of the time they're just making excuses. I'm sure she'll reply to you tomorrow or in a couple of days, being sorry for not replying but saying that she wants to see you so much and that next week it's fine.

>>33305748
kek nice

>11 likes on tinder
>get tinder plat
>every single one fat and ugly

>>33306890
Rude. They could be good people.

>>33306093
>Have you ever wondered how low iq prisoners, drug addicts and low life scum can magically attract women?
The real answer to this question is that the majority of western women are also low iq drug addicts. It's not that these types of people are magically attractive to women, they're just on the level most retarded normie women are on.

>>33306902
There's no good people left anon.

Its like average women dont exist. If they do tinder isnt showing them to me. Only hot girls who barely notice i exist or fuglies.

The girl on the bus sitting next to me in front of me suddenly turned to me and stared at me for 30 seconds (I've never seen a girl look me in the eye for so long), I kept staring at her until she gave up,

I won

>>33306108
My time, son. You fucked up

>asked her on thursday if she wanted just coffee "date" or dinner
You are signaling her biology that you are driven by fear and have no experience. Your goal as a masculine leader is to have fun and then for intimacy to happen. By asking her on a coffee date/lunch/cinema you are parading that you can waste your precious time on friendship activities. By asking her to make a decision you are not being attentive and thoughtful. You are putting responsibility of a choice on a woman. They hate that. They want a man, a leader, a decisive machine in motion, not a polite unsure friend

This woman had low interest to begin with, but you are oblivious to sexual polarity which is crucial to all forms of dating

>>33306939
>the majority of western women are also low iq drug addicts

That extreme assumption is your hurt ego speaking. Travel around, women are women no matter what culture, century or parent raised them. We are the product of millions of years of evolution, and women are not choosing to be themselves, just following fundamental emotional laws

>It's not that these types of people are magically attractive to women, they're just on the level most retarded normie women are on

You are doing classical fox and grape mental gymnastics. Devaluing what rejected you, instead of understanding it and starting to use rules to your favor

I assure you, even the best bubbliest, softest, loveliest, high class women with the best families ever will melt if you give them what low iq subhuman addicts give accidentally - focusing on yourself instead of a woman, never chasing even when they are leaving you, not being afraid to speak your mind in any situation, not going soft (falling in love instead of loving) as relationship deepens, giving her the whole range of emotional stimulation - but not by following her drama, rather being the source of drama yourself

>>33303949
>Kinda wild, isn't it? Not one generation ago dating was supposed to be fun and happy. I remember when I was in college 15 years ago things weren't nearly this bad. Hooking up or asking a girl out was soooo easy but then everyone got a fucking iPhone and then Tinder, Instagram, Onlyfans, etc. and now like 80% of women walk around like they're celebrities, even the fat busted ones. ESPECIALLY the fat busted ones

It's pretty bad in my younger days I could normally bag a fat busted one within a week but I tried that recently and this cunt was like "sorry, I don't think we're a match" Kek it's fucked m8.

>>33305767
>I regretted it, because the way you are going is trauma reinforcing, not trauma healing. You do need the edge and power. However sooner or later you will meet an ideal woman and lose her, because chad manipulation is all you can do, and it doesnt work past 6-12 years on high level women

100% truth, there's this one woman I chat with sometimes at my local spot but last week she really started talking a lot more to me and when she started going on a 20 min Reddit tirade about how Trump is mean to brown people and how her only hobby is vidya I noped the fuck out, few years ago I would have ignored all and every gaping red flag, everyone has baggage but that would annoy me and her dog she brings smells horrible kek.

>>33306021
>How do you ask a girl out? What do you say and what do you do? How do you approach? I am autistic and need examples. What do women find charismatic and attractive?

Practice talking to women with no intent on dating or banging them, spend lot of time around women and normies in public and you'll eventually learn to read the room. Gotta learn how to hold a basic conversation with anyone first.

>>33306093
>This is your learned limiting belief. Women are super attentive to character, and that beats the rest. Bezos got dumped, Brady got cheated on, etc

This. I've witnessed literal retards get women because they don't take anything seriously

>>33306108
>>asked her on thursday if she wanted just coffee "date" or dinner, she said dinner. She said thursday or friday this week was good and she would come back to me which day

Women hate coffee dates, I know a legit Stacy who only dates gigachads tell me this.

>>33307583
>Women hate coffee dates, I know a legit Stacy who only dates gigachads tell me this.
she's a self filtering retard then

>>33307617
she always brags about these hot guys that take her out on their yachts, she is a retard though kek

>>33307642
it'll come back to bite her, always does

>>33307642
Well, when you're at that level, I can see why she'd hate coffee dates. For a normal person, coffee dates are fine.

>gaming last night
>gf messages me saying she wants call me
>ah hell.jpg
>we talk
>entirely peaceful
>she hangs up in the middle of the call
>I clock in for the night
>wake up to texts she sent 3am saying she wants to break up
Fucking hell dude. Lesson of the day: if torn between gaming and women, choose the fucking video games.

I think she didn't like that I said I wouldn't go to a motel with her and would rather just bring her to my house. More convenient.

>>33307660
You are clueless, son. I apologize. But you need this

As I said before, coffee dates, lunches, morning runs, cinemas, and such are not dates. They are friendly meetings

A date is: two mutually sexually curious individuals, spending quality time together, face to face, with a possibility of sex happening

Women are story driven creatures looking for romance. Not only they are already social as fuck, they are super attentive to power, vibes and unspoken things

They want to talk to you in a beautiful place, do something mutual and memorable, be playful, get teased, be kidnapped by your leadership on adventures. To soften, to melt, to forget anything outside of the moment and just relax and have fun

And then, at the end of it, to get penetrated by you deeply into oblivion in a place with a roof and clean sheets

This is romance, emotions, desire, story, excitement

Coffee date is the opposite of it. Two boring accountants meeting to talk over the financial report of the last fiscal year. It is cute, but she already have that. With relatives, with friends

She wants a man and a love story. Not a gay friend and a latte

And when you do those things wrong you signal one of two options clearly 1) You are unaware of dating, so other women dont want you enough to give experience 2) You are aware, but choose to do in the wrong way out of fear of fucking up the whole proper date

Both options dry their vaginas

You can argue with me to death about common sense, saving money, rationality, women being entitled or any form of thinking. And it will be pointless because its female emotions. Emotions dont care about your logic

So be the man, arrange proper date, meet her in the evening for mutual activities, have fun, tease, play, dance, flirt, experiment and then penetrate her like a victor

>but chads dont have to do it

Chads dont connect to people, and then accumulate emotional damage. Even successful, rich and gorgeous people commit suicide

Where do I meet women and also make new friends now that I'm out of uni? Work hasn't been all too great for it and my gf and I just broke up. I have a feeling we'll be getting back together eventually but in the meantime, I'd like to up my game a bit and also just get some friends. I literally have no one in my life since she left me and my grandma's passing 6 months ago

>>33308703
>Chads dont connect to people, and then accumulate emotional damage.
Yeah, i'm sure chads are just downright miserable. No doubt.

>>33308724
Have you met them? I live in places, which people save salary the whole year to visit for a vacation. Chads are here, with motorcycles, yachts and villas

And they are my easiest customers for therapy, because all their situations are the same. Women are easy, but there is no drive to evolve as a character, because same women are super replaceable

And then chads meet the one woman who is challenging and exciting, once in a lifetime, and chads collapse like children when she tests and pulls away

>>33308756
I don't even mean this as some "boohoo rich problems" shit, but everyone is miserable to some extent. Some of them might rope at some point, but i'm pretty sure most of them are getting on just fine. i can't imagine the one that got away is really causing them any special sort of grief, you can find plenty of spergs on here lamenting their terminal cases of oneitis all the same.

I've been speaking with a girl, first one ever, for 3 weeks now (online) and we've done a couple kind of virtual dates. We have all the same core values, lifestyle, principles, same level of education, similar upbringing, etc and I've become a little attached to the idea of her

I have not developed any "feelings" though, and I'm not really sure whether I should have or not at this point. There was some rush when I was telling her personal things about me that I hadn't had anyone to share with before, but after that wore off nothing. I like the idea of her so far but that's basically it, I'm sort of over interacting with her and it seems more of a chore that I think I need to participate in to develop the relationship further. Is this how it's supposed to be or is it not working and I just don't know how to identify that.

I'm not diagnosed or anything but I'm probably a little on the spectrum and pretty emotional subdued so maybe that is part of it

>>33296140
What if it’s at an all female college and your a 30 year old (College Student passing) local heterosexual man?

>>33308703
Nah, first date should always be something casual, like coffee or drinks, to see if there's any chemistry. From date two onwards you put in more effort

>>33309345
While I think the guy you're replying to is a faggot, FWIW none of my "successful" first dates (led to something more later or ended on a kiss/getting laid) were ever the basic bitch coffee or drinks.
First, EVERY guy suggests coffee or drinks, you're not going to stand out. You should choose a place based on her hobbies, and ideally yours too. The last relationship I was in, we went to a nursery for our first date because we were both into plants.
Next, a good trick is to always have one or two spots nearby to go to if the date is going well. In my example, after the nursery we got dinner at a nearby Thai place we saw because it was a happening neighborhood with a lot of places to eat. After that we went to an "artisnal mead" bar (p good N G L) at which point she started cuddling and then making out with me. Roosh talked about bring a girl to multiple locations during the same date to create a "time distortion" effect, making it seem like you've known each other longer and building a stronger bond. Like or hate PUA shit in general, that particular tactic works.
So yeah, no coffee dates, unless you're continental European and coffee is a "thing" in your country I guess.

>>33295953 (OP)
I know it's not talked about much on these spaces. I don't even know how delusional and bluepilled most who post here are nowadays. But women will leave you if you are too good. It does happen bros. The most important person walked out of my life and it was all my fault, because before she met me she saw me do the same to another woman.

>>33308954
I thought you were describing me at first and I got scared. Best of luck!

>Walked past some ladies the other day with my shirt off
>Started wolf whistling and calling me sexy
>Didn't do this just once they did it continuously until I was out of the street

Did I fuck up bros or were they mocking me? I do workout, but I never take my shirt off in case I get laughed at. This is the first time I've been in public with no shirt on in about 15 years.

>>33309731
Next time ask them if the wantto touch you.

>>33309731
>Did I fuck up bros or were they mocking me?
Neither. They were just complimenting you and wanted to make you feel good.

>>33309731
I don't think they were mocking you, but they were just having fun. I'm sure that if you had approached they would have folded or try to dismiss it.

>>33309386
Obviously it's not very creative and IMO that's the point, you can eject yourself at any point if it doesn't feel right. I wouldn't do a high effort date you've described unless I had serious intentions for a girl. But then again, I'm more into short term relationships

>>33309738
I couldn't interact with them without spilling my spaghetti. That's out of the question.

>>33309739
>>33309748
Thanks bros.

>in town on mon-wed
>matched girl 2 weeks ago
>ask her out for drinks, she can only go in 2 weeks (this monday)
>we didn't talk these 2 weeks because both busy
>today she says she can't on monday but asks if sunday works
>I dont have a place to stay until mondays or I'd have to book a hotel on my own costs but aint no fkn way
How do I tell her I can only if I can stay over at her place. I suppose it's basically implying were hooking up which was already kind of implied since I told her it's my last week in town and we're going out for drinks but at least she then had the option of saying no if I would ask her to come back to my room if we didn't vibe or whatever.
Do I just suggest it and say I totally understand if she's not willing to let me and we can just leave it? I'll ask her for dinner too probably if she says yes.

>>33309826
Just sleep in your car if you don't manage to secure the invite back to her place. It's a gamble but consider it extra incentive :)

where should I look if I want to find a cute clingy furry BPD girlfriend?

I used to be an alcoholic drug addicted club crawler and you wouldn't believe how many guys like this there are. They're 6'3" with hair like a shampoo commercial and a jawline that can cut glass. They're also daydrinking cokeheads on welfare who dropped out of high school, never had a job in their whole life and their only skill is superficial charm resulting from constant female validation since age 13 when they shot up to adult height over the course of one summer vacation. Their girlfriends are invariably beautiful, younger, college educated, financially well off stacies from rich families who binge drink and snort marching powder once a month. They tolerate Chad being a "manchild" that leeches off them just fine until they outgrow the clubs (ie start feeling old next to the pre-wall girls) and get the itch for kids in their 30s. Then Chad gets another. Chad does this until he's 40. These guys really live like those lovable immature womanizer Hollywood characters in entertainment. It really is a different universe for them. Average or below guys increasingly just give up on relationships for good reason. She will never lust after you like she did for that deadbeat junkie no matter how much you make or how responsible you are or whatever else if you're average. Not to even speak of the poor bastards who are short, go bald early, keep a babyface, etc. Nothing can help them at all. Life is a beauty contest, that's all.

>>33310200
Why are you disparaging me so hard, anon :(

There were even times when I was homeless for a few months, spending the entire day at the local Starbucks because I had nowhere else to go, and I'd have girls approaching me lol. Good times.

My friend invited me to go to clubbing for the first time ever. It's at a house music club. How do I make the most of it in terms of meeting girls?

>>33311738
Are you attractive?
Do you have confidence?
Can you read body language?
IF you answered yes to all three questions then just go up to a women on a dance floor and start dancing.

If you answered no to anyone of those questions. Then your best bet is to just have fun with your friends and try again later, once you can say yes to all the questions.

>>33311738
If you make eye contact smile. If you make eye contact multiple times she wants you to approach.

>>33311757
How to get better at reading body language

>>33311738
Treat everyone as if they're already your friend, in terms of social comfort. Then based on how they respond, you go from there, either continuing and escalating or backing off.

>>33311823
It is a learned skill. Essentially you are pushing a line. When you move closer does it look like they recoil? If so pull back. If they move closer then escalate. You want to see if they want you to continue advancement. That just takes time and practice unfortunately.

>>33311867
If a girl doesn't recoil when my face is extremely close to her face is that good

>>33295953 (OP)
I tried the Wingman app but a lot of the openers it gave me were cringe

>>33311882
How close?

>>33311913
Inch or two like if we look at a phone together

>>33311938
Well that is a little different. But still a good sign. Just gotta escalate if the timing is good.

If someone liking you or caring about you in the slightest is out of your control, what's the point of having hope?

>>33311946
There's a very real possibility that I will never have sex again. Thank you though.

>>33311980
180 y tho

>>33311996
Long story.

>>33312002
Make sentences shorter

>>33312010
No thank u. Bye anon <3

>>33311980
I'm sure that whatever you said wasn't bad enough to deserve castration.

>>33312045
You underestimate the immense power of depression and shame induced by absolutely abject consistent failure to a degree so spectacular that you wouldn't think another human could be so monumentally inept.

>>33312056
No way it was that bad

>>33312056
Bold of you to assume that I don't feel that every time I show my face and try to interact with anyone.

>>33312069
Forgive me, me.
>>33312066
Worse

>>33312074
Give your start and end point.

>>33312075
Its probably not good for my brain to relive these things by detailing them. My brain has almost gotten to complete acceptance and resignation, instead of immense pain and self directed anger.

>>33312087
Bruh

>>33312087
They say talking about trauma helps.

>>33312094
>>33312102
Imagine if you will, that you were on your best behavior for a while and god decided to reward you with something so pristine and angelic to your exact specifications, and you approached this specimen and your first conversation lasted an hour or more just in public together, and she said that she had just broken up with her boyfriend and she couldn't believe this was happening and that she had met you and how surreal it was and then later that evening, she wrote to you saying that she was worried she would never find love again, so you respond by love bombing her with paragraphs because you saw it as a signal, and then she replied the next day simply by telling you sorry but she was a lesbian when she very clearly wasn't and then she blocked you. Haha. Thats just one fuck up. My dick also wouldn't get hard after my oneitis finally gave me a chance after 10 years. There are so many more stories... such painful, pathetic stories.

>>33312119
>you respond by love bombing her with paragraphs because you saw it as a signal
are you fucking autistic

>>33312136
I think they might just be retarded. That is literally retard speak.

>>33312119
Unironically, your mistake was believing either in love or in a woman, depending on how you want to see it.

>>33312136
Im in pain

>>33312156
>>33312164

>>33312136
And I fucking told you it was bad faggot what the fuck did you expect a story that you could reply to saying "bro youre overthinking it its not that bad" dumb cunt

>>33312184
im not that guy

>>33312119
>>33312184
she flat out told you she was interested in you and you only saw it as a signal? if i was you i wouldve asked to meet up again instead of "love bombing her with paragraphs." she saw it as a red flag and didnt want anything to do with you.

>>33309729
Keks. What state are you from?

>>33312203
Damn dude you came to that conclusion all on your own? Are you some kind of genius or something? Thank god you visit 4chans advice board! Ive been stewing on that mystery for ages but you easily uncovered it! Thank you so much anon!!!

>>33300511
>What are you talking about with your dates? Who is leading the conversation?

I try to be humorous when possible
But generally, the obvious things
start with work, hobbies, hometown, childhood, relationships,

but I genuinely try not to be boring with my responses
it just that I think that I get filtered somewhere
like girls genuinely have low tolerance for any mistake it seems

>spent most my time in college in a long-term relationship then coof happened and everything went online, never met anyone
>started career
>lost touch with friends and never made new ones
>dance classes were a failure
>dating apps were an abysmal failure
>clubs are definitely not my type of place
>nearest bars are a 40 minute drive away and almost never have any single women

it hit me today that it's totally possible that I'll never meet anyone, that I may just be one of the many thousands of men who checked out of society, whether by choice or not, and just spend their time playing video games or whatever and being totally alone. there was never a guarantee of a woman for every man, and there is no cosmic balancing act. I may very well be doomed to die alone simply by circumstance of being born in this stratified era where the top 10% of men have harems and the rest get nothing. that's an extremely depressing thought. enough to make me genuinely consider roping at some distant point in the future, say if I make it to 35 and am still single (currently 28).

someone give me some hope, give me a new strategy, someone tell me that it's still possible to meet women nowadays without being a 6'7" finance chad.

>>33313168
meeting women is easy
just move to a major city

or move up in your job where you have enough cash to visit major cities often
go to meetup.com or something like that

go to language exchange or bar hoping events, or hobby group events and make friends with everyone

become a regular at a really cool venue, befriend the hostess or host or owner
invite any of your friends to that one spot

along the way you take pictures, showcase it on social media
you'll build social proof
then you'll have a sure fire way to approach any women on apps or in person and you will have a much higher chance of success

if this feels like a lot of effort that's because it is.
being a valuable man means you're a person who has put in effort

the only type of man who gets laid or has a girlfriend has some sort of valuable life that was created through effort

>>33313168
There is a cosmic balancing act. The scale just isn't what you assumed to be fair. You are a loser. Gg no re

>>33313168
Ill give you a serious answer. Boomhauer method. Seriously. Exercise, be well groomed, dress nice and smell nice, and then just go do the boomhauer technique. You'll get better the more you do it, and then once you get your first lay you'll get even better at a compounding rate. You have to just let go and embrace the chaos of uncertainty and not get caught up with your fragile emotions even if you get rejected 50 times. When I first started doing it I was shaking so much I looked like a fucking Crack head, but I wanted to get laid so I just kept at it, and got better, and enjoyable. Or you can just whine on 4chan faggot

>>33313168
>dance classes were a failure
Did you not learn to dance? This is something I've always wanted to learn because it was forbidden in my religious group when I was growing up, but what man would not be a dancer if he could?

>>33313168

i mean you could always just troon out and be part of the harem js

>>33313168
welcome to the club. make some friends in whatever activity and just forget about it. jerking off is free and less hassle than dealing with a retarded woman.

>>33313168
>it hit me today that it's totally possible that I'll never meet anyone, that I may just be one of the many thousands of men who checked out of society, whether by choice or not, and just spend their time playing video games or whatever and being totally alone. there was never a guarantee of a woman for every man, and there is no cosmic balancing act. I may very well be doomed to die alone simply by circumstance of being born in this stratified era where the top 10% of men have harems and the rest get nothing. that's an extremely depressing thought. enough to make me genuinely consider roping at some distant point in the future, say if I make it to 35 and am still single (currently 28).

I used to think like this until I started going out on dates and realized do I even want to be with any of these women? The answer is no.

>>33313233
>Ill give you a serious answer. Boomhauer method. Seriously. Exercise, be well groomed, dress nice and smell nice, and then just go do the boomhauer technique. You'll get better the more you do it, and then once you get your first lay you'll get even better at a compounding rate. You have to just let go and embrace the chaos of uncertainty and not get caught up with your fragile emotions even if you get rejected 50 times. When I first started doing it I was shaking so much I looked like a fucking Crack head, but I wanted to get laid so I just kept at it, and got better, and enjoyable. Or you can just whine on 4chan faggot

I don't even get nervous or anxious, women are a pain in the ass and I have not met one in recent years that I could get excited about, there are decent women out there but the good ones get taken off the market.

>>33313522
>the good ones get taken off the market.
By the guys that put themselves out there and appear presentable. Be that guy.

>>33313529
>By the guys that put themselves out there and appear presentable. Be that guy.

The problem is that I can't find myself getting excited, the last chick I started chatting with went on a 20 min rant about how MAGA is a racist sexist movement. Overall now that I've gotten over any anxiety I feel perma detached. Maybe I'm depressed idk.

>>33313208
I'm glad you brought up that last part, because that was the second part of my epiphany today. that with my current station in life (full time job, live with parents, no friends, half an hour away from anywhere where people my age might hang out), reversing course would take a monumental amount of effort, likely the hardest thing I've done in my easy comfortable life.

>>33313262
sure I learned how to dance, they were a failure in the sense that almost no single women showed up. there were a few single women here and there but they never showed up more than twice.

>>33313413
I refuse to join your club

>sometimes the universe only gives you one chance to get it perfect
>if you fail that's it forever

>>33313597
Please shut up

>>33313597
Read
>>33312119

>>33313556
>I refuse to join your club
lol

>been working out past few months
>hanging out with female friend
>hot as fuck so take shirt off (I have a tank top underneath tho, not shirtless)
>From just outside my peripheral vision see her check me out twice
>Felt my arm for no real reason multiple times
Cool

>>33314005
Fuck her right in the pussy.

>>33313208
Funny thing about this is I've upgraded myself to the point where I *should* be a slayer, but I'm not due to the years of internalized self hatred, it's gotten to a point where some of my friends are legitimately pissed at me that I don't get laid, they all believe in me more than I do myself and I'm letting them down. Fucking sucks. I honestly wish I was a bit stupider, I'd be more bold, I wouldn't have the hard data of all my failures blaring in my head at all times, ugh

>>33314038
>I honestly wish I was a bit stupider, I'd be more bold, I wouldn't have the hard data of all my failures blaring in my head at all times, ugh

That's what alcohol is for anon.

>>33305037
I'd rather get AID from heroine

>>33312550
You're welcome fren! Glad I could help

>>33295953 (OP)
looks like you ran out of pictures of attractive women for these threads

>>33308829
>had long-distance relationships
>way better face-2-face, hearth-2-hearth

>>33313556
>they were a failure in the sense that almost no single women showed up
But that doesn't matter, anon. You learned how to dance, so you're already more attractive.

>>33314362
nta but what's the point then? It's like picking up bricks for a house that will never be built.

>>33314401
What's the point in making yourself a more well-rounded person? Anon, do you listen to yourself? What's the point in getting that degree, if it doesn't, by itself get you women? What's the point of bodybuilding? What's the point of fashion, and all the things that make us individuals? What's the point of it all if no single thing is going to get you to meet a woman? The point is that all the little things add up. Being a dancer is one of the most attractive things you can be as a man.

>>33314038

When you finally get over your self hatred you find that you'll no longer have that feeling of needing someone in your life.

new thread
>>33316138

>>33316138

>>33316138