Any advice welcome.

I met a girl through a sugar baby site and paid a significant sum to take her virginity. I deflowered her. Now I can't stop thinking about her. I keep replaying it in my head over and over and over.
the way it felt, the way she looked, the way she reacted.
At first, it was just curiosity. A twisted fantasy I wanted to tick off the list. But nowit mutating into anobsession.

All i can say is that i wasn't like fucking a regular prostitute. I've been with high end escorts, some of the best money can buy. This was different. It felt real. Almost like… making love.

I mean this is what I missed in my youth. Isn't it? That teenage passion. That sense of wonder and innocence before sex became mundane. I didn't even knew what I had missed it until I felt it.

Right now, I'm paying her to act like my girlfriend. To be exclusive with me. And I'm seriously considering selling both my cars just so I can offer to pay her to carry my child.

I know she'll probably drain my bank account. I know this can't end well. I KNOW But in my mind i feel like i can always start over and build wealth from zero if that happens, even if it takes me 10 years from tonight. But having her child.... thats priceless. I don't understand what's happening, I can't understand why I'm feeling the way I'm feeling. I'm scared but I'm also happy and for once I know what I want in life beyond materialism.

>>33300267 (OP)
Why don’t you just pay for marriage and then she can go in debt with you?

>>33300267 (OP)
>I met a girl through a sugar baby site and paid a significant sum to take her virginity. I deflowered her.
You and 20 other blokes before and after. Its called a hustle. Get over it mate.