I have been in a relationship for about 4 years now, I love her so much. We are great together but I have been addicted to porn now for maybe 2 years. In that 2 years we have had sex maybe three times and I couldn't cum. It's not her fault, she's horny constantly. We've talked about it. She has said she can wait as long as it takes.

It started about 2 years ago she gained around 90 lbs out of stress. With all due respect, she went from the skinny girl with the nice ass to a disgusting slob with a huge gut. It completely killed me interest in sex so I started jacking off. And it started getting fucked up... jacking off to softcore models and fantasizing about cheating on them, etc.

She has since gotten back down to a much more healthy weight and I am attracted to her physically again but I feel like I have fucked my brain up. I jack off for hours, any chance I get alone, I jack off to the same cheating fantasies. Any hot girl I see in public I go crazy over. It should be stated I have OCD so I obsess over everything to the point it ruins my day. I have tried quitting the porn a few times, the longest I went was about 3 weeks but I didn't feel any different and just went back to it stupidly.

Does anyone have any experience or advice? I'm tired of doing this to myself and my partner.

>>33311785 (OP)
>the longest I went was about 3 weeks but I didn't feel any different and just went back to it stupidly.
Hey I went through something similar. I had a porn addiction and it was so bad I needed to watch porn to get hard for my gf at the time, who is pretty attractive.

It takes longer than 3 weeks. It's literally like weening yourself off of drugs, it takes time for your brain to stabilize and go back to normal. For me after about 2-3 months of abstaining from porn is when I started going back to normal. By the 6th month porn-free I was getting hard no problem and everything was back to normal. A good test of progress is your ability to jack off without porn using just your imagination, if you can do that regularly then you've basically healed.

You are just in constant OCD episodes and it is controlling your life. I would suggest going back to fundamental coping or try EMDR

>>33311800
Thanks anon, so when you were horny as fuck during the beginning and really wanted to jack off, did you just keep saying no to yourself? Whats your thought process to get through all the "fuck it bro just do it" thoughts?

>>33311847
Jack off without porn. It's the porn that's the problem, not jacking off. I masturbate like twice a day now and it hasn't impacted my ability to get hard at all.

It'll probably be difficult to use only your imagination at first but that's expected.