Im a fucking moron who couldnt figure out myself at age 25 and started HRT. Ive been such a submissive child to my parents and just barely got through school and just lived at home while working for the past 10 years. I never felt attracted to anyone, never had any plans for relationships, never had an idea what I was going to do with my life. I just wanted to be nice to everyone and do the hard work and do the right thing. Im not a crazy person but around 25 I couldnt fucking handle giving so much of myself to other people with 0 return so I just flipped. I basically started threatening my parents, got frustrated with my friends, and just started doing Hrt because I wanted to appreciate myself more. Ive never done anything that impulsive/experimental before but I got so frustrated with my life, I just I wanted to shuffle my cards and do something new.

Now Im 27 and far more confused than before and feeling stupid about myself. Advice appreciated

Get off HRT unless you mean steroids, you need to be thinking sensibly for this section of your life. You need to be clear-headed and not estrogen brained.

>>33320031
It sounds like HRT made you Spazz out and burn all your bridges

>>33320036
No that was all before I started basically. I started hrt because I was mad at trying to do the "right thing" and just wanted something for myself. Im definitely not going to do T that would be 10x worse than my current situation. I do wish I didnt start in the first place though

>>33320016 (OP)
I dont understand, did you do HRT just for fun or because you felt/wanted to be a girl since childhood?

>>33320171
>I dont understand
me either

>did you do HRT just for fun or because you felt/wanted to be a girl since childhood?
Yes its been on my mind since a very young age. During/after high school I thought I could just ignore it, and I probably could have, but my life just got so frustrating to me and seemed pointless. I felt suicidal enough to where I said fuck it Ill do some bizarre thing that everyone else is doing because it did kinda seem like a dream come true. But I decided to not do any kind of social transition whatsoever, because I found it insincere and vain. Maybe if I had a higher voice I would have tried but idk, it still seems fake.

So now Im here, still a male to everyone who knows me, and I feel weird about myself/my decisions. I look at myself/my body and feel admiration and pride, but I also huge sense of "this is strange" and constant stress over basically having breasts as a male.

So now every week I overthink everything about myself and my decisions, delay my shot for days, get lazy and emo and just take the shot anyways. Im basically just kicking the can down the road.

>>33320349
ok so if u feel better on hrt then whats the problem? just start working towards looking more like a woman

>>33320016 (OP)
I won't read frankenstein threads.

>>33321347
BVSED

>>33320399
>ok so if u feel better on hrt then whats the problem? just start working towards looking more like a woman
hdsjjshdhsajdjdhsjshshskdhskskdj
I dont think I like it. I have no idea. Its like I think about it and appreciate it. But then I realize what Im doing and I have a male doing experimental chemicals and now I have breasts. Which I dont even know how I feel about. This is why I dont get a therapist, I don't have any idea where to start or why I feel so tumultuous about it

This nigga gave himself tits lmao

>>33322471
Im suprised how long its taken for someone to flat out say that lol. I feel like old 4chan would have literally knocked some sense into me with verbal harrasment

>>33321347
Thanks autistic spammer anon

>>33320016 (OP)
Hey on the bright side I got my tits from cheeseburgers. You can reverse this right?

>>33324681
>You can reverse this right?
lol

I used to have a completely flat chest and now I got moooobs.

>>33321908
Idk, I feel like if you wanted to be a girl since a very young age unlike all those fake trannies then trying to get as close to looking like a girl as possible should be the goal, i guess if it doesnt work out you can always go back

>>33325146
>unlike all those fake trannies
Is there any difference? Like, Im seriously trying to live my life as genuine as I can, and so far I have more doubts about myself than people who openly admit to transitioning for a fetish.

I dont think theres any accurate standards for who is more "real" as a trans person.

>>33325209
can u recall an event that made u start wanting to be a girl? ask yourself if you would still take hrt if you were the only person left on earth

>>33325253
>ask yourself if you would still take hrt if you were the only person left on earth
Blehh. That question is what kinda helped me start. I was in like a "fuck everyone else, im going to do what i want" mood when I started. If I was alone, Id definitely feel more confident just being outwardly feminine and expressing myself more openly.

Idk. I dont think Im ever gonna understand myself perfectly and I should just learn that. I think my current issue is not with my gender but just HRT itself. Its just this bizarre, vain process Im doing just because Im unhappy with myself. Its weird.

>>33320016 (OP)
Complete and absolute mind-brokenness from western secular morality.

Get me off clown world.

>>33325352
ok so your problem is just the potential social reprecussions, if u think u would feel better bout your body if it was more feminine thats all that matters really

>>33325352
>Its just this bizarre, vain process Im doing just because Im unhappy with myself
grim.

>>33325517
>ok so your problem is just the potential social reprecussions
yeah i guess
>if u think u would feel better bout your body if it was more feminine thats all that matters really
idk
>>33325797
ill be ok