Im 24. I feel brain dead. I have no will nor desire, other than to pass time. I treated my hypogonadism and hypothyroidism, and made significant progress on my sleep apnea. I supplement my vitamin D deficiency. I am not obese, but I have put on some weight in recent months due to a back injury(I now have constant nerve pain in my back, hips, and legs due to a pinched nerve in my spine).
From what I can recall, I have only had 2 weeks where I felt normal:
>the week after I did shrooms for the first time and meditated. this was about 2 years ago
>the third week of my carnivore diet. this was 2 weeks ago.
Both times, what stopped the mental clarity was me vaping weed. I will never ever touch drugs again. The carnivore diet was miserable for me because just the thought of eating another steak is enough to get me to the verge of throwing up. Couple that with losing the mental clarity, and I was just miserable 24/7, so I stopped. I am planning to give it another try after a short break.
What else can I do?

>>33325208 (OP)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-immolation

Bump

kys

bump

>>33325208 (OP)
have sex

>>33325208 (OP)
B vitamins, lions mane mushroom, magnesium every night, melatonin, eat a fuckton of bananas (they restore neurotransmitters and don’t worry about sugar it’s not the same as eating bread)

Take zinc also. Get it in a tincture. Vaping might have given you neurological damage.

Make sure to use your cpap every night and do cardio.

>>33330079
I do
>>33330242
Tried all of that in the past. Not against trying them again, but I feel like theyre a dead end.
>vaping might have given you neurological damage
I was never vaping habitually. Just socially or to help me sleep(the last time I vaped)
>cpap
Didnt work for me. Im hoping to try a bipap after some alternatives like a dental appliance. Also, my nose used to always feel clogged due to enlarged turbinates, but I've seen great success with using a nasal steroid spray which allows me to breathe through my nose properly.
>do cardio
I cant. Walking for 10 minutes is enough to aggravate my pinched nerve for the rest of the day.

You probably also have derealization

Start meditating (practice good physical and spiritual hygene).
Get book angels and archangels by damien echols (high magik is also good)
Practice ceremonial magik for healing.
Only thing that i know beyong western medicine that can help is the tools of the ancients and mystics. If you give it a couple of months it will change you.
Hope you get better.

Forgot to mention, I've tried plenty of anti depressants but my psychiatrists gave up on them and just said I have treatment resistant major depressive disorder. I tried transcranial magentic stimulation, and that did not help at all.
They also determined I have signs of traumatic brain injuries from some brain activity scans.
>>33332411
Yes, and typically depersonalization when drugs are involved or I'm really down.
>>33333035
So channeling my mental illness towards developing schizophrenia in order to find a will to live is my best answer? Thanks i guess

bump

>>33325208 (OP)
>24
The evil number. It's over. Start shopping for a walker and adult diapers.

>>33341067
I've been like this for as long as I can remember.