Ever I started a new job last November I’ve been finding it hard to do much of anything. When I say do anything I do mean anything.I just sort of laze around like a vegetable wishing I could do things
They feel too distant and it feels like I don’t have time to do them, they feel like impossibilities or just something “locked out” that can’t be done “now”…
I’ve tried forcing myself to do these things during this mental state and nothing happens I don’t suddenly break free
But my job is not stressful and I have plenty of free time so I don’t believe it could be the cause
This sort of feeling lasted for 6 months, stopped for about one month, and then continued for this last month and stopped now again
When I am in this mental state I never feel like doing things and put things off and am way more cynical and just uncaring - I’m not striving towards anything I’m not proactively trying to do something

But suddenly, for no cause, my mood 180s
This past time I woke up randomly at 1:30 AM and just suddenly felt like….tomorrow will be different
Im positive and proactive and more energetic and caring and not putting things off etc

Due to how seemingly random these peaks and valleys are I cannot tell if I’m just a habitual person, however, if I don’t do things daily / regularly I don’t do them at all, build a habit of not doing them which then spirals into months of inactivity until, like when I woke up early, broke the cycle

It should be noted that this is just desire not always doing things because then I can’t always focus
So maybe this is also partially dopamine being fried / needing to front load responsibilities?

This is honestly starting to take a toll on me cause any brief period of positivity has a lingering thought of how it won’t last in the back of my mind
I can’t tell if I can prevent all this or not

TL;DR I cycle between periods of productivity and inactivity and cannot tell if they are self inflicted or not

I posted a text wall but still ran out of room

I just want to note that I do have a variety of hobbies and maybe I’m pressuring myself too much about doing them all
Maybe I need to focus on consistency over efficiency
Even an hour a day every day is better than months of doing literally nothing in my free time

>>33343095 (OP)
I don't believe in "dopamine fry".
The first thing we need to do is acknowledge the facts. Factually, you are experiencing peaks and troughs of mood and motivation. This is unusually strong for you. Most people, if they have similar peak-and-trough patterns, don't feel it as strongly as you.
Factually, most people do not find it difficult to do the things they enjoy doing. Most people find it easy to do the things they enjoy doing. Because they enjoy them. So something unusual is preventing you from doing the things you enjoy when you're in your trough zone.

This could have a variety of causes, but the key point is that you're totally right to want to investigate further. You could be bipolar. There could be some environmental factor we haven't considered. You could have ADHD. You could be bipolar and have ADHD and have environmental factors. You could just sometimes get temporary depression (this is more common than people think).

You haven't described anything in your post which suggests these cycles are self inflicted.

Sorry I can't give you a more specific answer.
>It should be noted that this is just desire not always doing things because then I can’t always focus
I don't understand what you're trying to say in this sentence sorry

>>33343193
What I meant was I am only discussing feelings of desire but not always the act of doing things which is another issue based upon focus

>>33343095 (OP)
sounds like hormonal cycles or something to do with how much sunlight you get o algo

>>33343095 (OP)
This happens from being isolated, it makes it very difficult to do anything. That leads to pursuing the easiest possible things which are video games and social media. You just have to force yourself over the hump and do it.

>>33343234
I’ve tried
Sometimes I can sometimes I can’t

I dunno when I’m doing good I can do anything and am of course just super productive, etc
But I’m unsure if this is a chicken and the egg scenario
Am I productive due to being in a good mental state
Or am I in a good mental state from being productive

I believe I will try to combine the knowledge of how bad it feels to do nothing with the sort of idealized version of myself I want to create to use as motivation to do things - other than just enjoying it
Hopefully it works
And hopefully I don’t forget that I enjoy things
Happens all the time I drop it for months thinking I’ll never enjoy something again then one day I do it and love it again

Well anyway let’s see how long this good mood lasts

>>33343095 (OP)
Yes, all that.

>>33343095 (OP)
I am literally the same. Being retarded is not it, this I can tell for sure. It's some psychological issue that I haven't figured out completely yet. I thought I am burned out, hence the mental blockage. Could this be the case in your situation? Personally this phases come, when I spend too much time working very focused day in and out for a couple weeks, sometimes not even leaving the house, and the a phase starts when I am a vegetable and are barely able to function.

How does you work/life balance look like? What do you do outside of your official job?

Dopamine fried brain could be a partial reason. Doom scrolling, for example, can occupy your mind too much, don't give it a opportunity to rest, hence you are mentally overloaded.

>>33344794
i think if i allow myself to rest i do dumb shit and waste time

>>33343095 (OP)
>>33343193
>>33344794
https://sharischreiber.com/inside-attention-deficit-disorder/

this article helped me, and then I just optimise-maxxed with Huberman. hope it helps. just find better cycles of genuine rest during a 'low' x

>>33345727
Will read but isn’t this guy a hack

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