I'm approaching my biggest exam session of my college life. It's a chance to make up for all my failures and for taking a gap year but I'm terrified that I'll just fail once more and go back to my regularly scheduled failures

My parents don't know it but if I fail I plan on moving out and seeking out my luck in the outside world. They wouldn't know where I am or what I'm doing and I'd focus on getting a job to cover renting some flat with (most likely) a random roommate

I'll either return to college to finish my degree when I stabilize or kill myself if it turns out I'm not cut out for this life. Either way I'm sick of being a burden and I plan to either adapt or die

I desperately need advice. I'm so lonely and there's this girl obsessed with me (she said I love you within 2 days of matching online) I know it's unhealthy but I haven't talked to her in 3 weeks and I'm feeling low and want to message her and make her fall for me again. What should I do? I'm afraid of her crazy but she's also hypersexual

>>33345493
do you only want to talk to her because you're lonely? if so then I'd skip it and hold out. if you're just freaked out that she came on so strong you should meet and tell her that but that you're still interested.

>>33345493
>should I take advantage of a girl love bombing me to temporarily band aid my loneliness?
I mean this is just the standard these days

She agreed to come with me on this trip, and now she's talking to me like we're a thing for the first time. very happy about this, I overthink everything. I need to trust myself more but so often convince myself not to trust a hope.

That was valid to be mad at me for that.
apologies

>>33345502
I mean she knows how to make me feel good but she has a lot of baggage. I am lonely though, there's no denying that

>>33345504
So I shouldn't?

>>33345528
No

I'm addicted to porn. I'm a femcel in my mid twenties, and I've been hooked since I was 15. I've never been in a relationship and I'm basically using it as a replacement for what I can't get. I'm just scarred that this addiction is a major factor in my inability to form any decent relationships.

I just needed a win. That's all. It didn't have to be a big win.

Went to a date, first one in years
>Know this guy trough my younger sister
>She said he has a good sense of humour
>I picked the place
>met him in local karaoke bar
>talk with him, seems nice
>tells me to wait, asks for my drink of choice
>nice
>comes back
>DJ calls for his name
wut.jpg
>And now <ANON> is going to sing us a classic from Rick Astley!
ohdeargod
>yup, he sings the rickroll song
>cant even be mad he is good
felt like I should be ashamed as he pointed at me while he performed
>gets massive applause from the 12+ people in the bar
"Sorry, I couldnt resist."

And I am going to a 2nd date, and I wanted to get this off my chest. because that is the cringiest, yet funniest first date I have ever had.

>>33345562
I thought women were immune to porn?

What will become of us?

it's over.

Bruh, I'm tired of narcissist in the workplace disrupting the flow of everything

>>33345633
Unfortunately no.

>>33345630
Ok, anon. That is cringe. But did he do the dance while he sang?
The more I think about it. I wish I had the balls to do the same. Or even perform karaoke at all. Im too meek.

You are a retard that has been brainwashed by the powers that be.
As a father of three little girls, I have learned that there is something fundamentally Good in Lolis, which is why Evil HATES them and wants them gone.
When I sit and she sits on my lap, when I lie down and she lies on my chest, when I walk and she chases me or clings onto my leg, when I crouch planting a potato and she climbs on my back and whispers in my ear or nuzzles my neck, I feel bliss and am filled with desire.
The desire to build and create. The desire to protect good and destroy evil.
I would bomb and murder and hunt and exterminate for her.
This is why they want to keep lolis away from the common man. They brainwash men into hating the mere idea.
(((They))) fear the lolicon.

>>33345665
oh yes. the whole dance number too

>>33345493
You know it's unhealthy
Just find a hobby or go on a journey to figure out how to be content while alone

At least I recognized how ugly inside she was before I got my hopes up

WHY THE FUCK WON'T ANYONE MESSAGE ME? I ASKED YOU HOW YOU WERE DOING SINCE YOU WERE GONE FOR 2 MONTHS AND YOU RESPONDED KINDLY AND WHEN YOU ASK ME HOW I'M DOING AND I SAY NOT GOOD YOU LEAVE ME ON READ FOR 1 MONTH? FUCK YOU! FUCK EVERYONE! I'M TIRED OF BEING KIND TO PEOPLE NOBODY DESERVES IT! I HATE PEOPLE SO FUCKING MUCH! NOBODY GIVES A FUCK ABOUT ME SO WHY THE FUCK SHOULD I CARE ABOUT OTHERS?

>>33345703
I'm sorry anon. Why were you not good?

>>33345659
you don't think if you had love and a decent sex life you'd be able to quit? if you're actually struggling and communicate this to a caring partner he could try and hold you accountable. or is it that you can't be satisfied now? I was a big time porn addict when I was a teenager and it made my sex life really difficult at the beginning, but eventually got out of it and now won't watch it at all. don't give up

>>33345703
people have very little social battery for others who aren't doing well in life. it's unfortunate but the way of the world, especially if you've been this way for a long time. getting yourself right starts from the inside, start there. when you have something to offer, like joy, people will care. sorry you feel unseen.

>>33345710
Everything lately feeling more lonely than usual, dad getting cancer, and failing road test
>>33345726
The thing is she's very kind and I've supported her in the past. I don't know why she did that :(

>The narcissist, the covert narcissist, the undiagnosed bipolar, the bpd, the ADHD, the anxious, the PTSD, the depressed, the addicted, the envious, the immature

All is forgiven

God please save me from these people
Let me be a hermit or put me with a more saner crowd

>>33345754
Modern horoscopes.

>>33345714
>if you had love and a decent sex life you'd be able to quit?
I could say some stupid excuse about waiting for marriage but the truth is I'm scared of sex. I have a sex drive and I want a relationship but I'm I'm terrified of exposing myself that intimately to someone. I also have abandonment issues on top of that. It's kinda ironic but being a prude actually fuelled my addiction.

>>33345784
so you're filling a void then? sounds like you need a relationship with baby steps, and lots of understanding. the darkness you're experiencing isn't permanent. find someone who doesn't want sex soon and work with them, be honest about your fears, and take it slow. Eventually trust will build, you can do a lot of things before sex. Have you ever held someone's hand? Read to them?

I am in a great confusion and miss my ex-girlfriend terribly, even though I know our getting back together would spell mutual disaster and probably death for at least one of us. Still, there's a kind of black compulsion deep inside me to reattach myself to her, whatever come. I have a form of romantic phantom limb syndrome -- I feel a part of me is missing in her absence. So what am I to do, except flounder in darkness and drink myself to sentimental stupor and post on 4chan obliquely about how I feel? Anyway, I don't anticipate to live much longer. I wonder if I should tell her I'm going blind, according to the latest tests. Nevermind, it's okay. I'll sober up and put myself back together.

>>33345480
Good luck on your test, Anon

>>33345714
finding someone who connects with you, loves you, and matches sex drive makes everything else in life so much easier. don’t settle. have reasonable expectations though

>>33345901
I'll first have to figure out how to stop pushing people away. I've had some nice conversations with men I've been interested in but nothing more. There's one man I really like and I'm still struggling to open up to him even though I've known him since childhood

We dated for 5 years and she probably isn't even thinking about me. How can you just entirely remove someone from your life so quickly who you allegedly loved and still do, again, allegedly? Women make no sense

>>33346148
Bruh, give it time
If you were a good partner then she won't find that relationship that easily again
Just because they don't outwardly show it don't mean they aren't hurting

Being with a narc ruined my view on relationships.
You mean that hot bop that was sooo into me was habitually lying and cheating behind my back despite my best efforts to be a good man and keep her happy?
I can't even look at a pretty woman without thinking she's too much trouble to deal with.

>>33346148
I don't know why you two broke up but sometimes you have to completely remove someone from your life in order to move on. If she's not a psychopath and you haven't been horrible to her she probably struggles just as much as you.

>>33346164
>Bruh, give it time
Give time for what? I told her I wanted to talk again and she said she "needs a bit more time, she isn't ready for this right now" it's been a week and a half man, this is just so annoying

>>33346194
We broke up because she's been going through a mental episode and wanted to not get me involved in everything and have it "effect me". I told her that she needs to go to therapy if it's too much to even talk about with her "best friend" (me). She said we could still be friends for now, which I was cool with, and she said she still loves me but I shouldn't wait for her. Well, I'm going to and at the very least, I want to make sure she's okay but she doesn't want to talk to me rn

>>33346191
narcissism is more common in men. NPD is often regarded as the "male" version of BPD. You sure she wasn't just BPD?

The modern world is an ugly place. Going out in public is a living, breathing horror movie.

>>33346200
It takes time for your absence to be felt
If you're knocking on her door a week later then she's still going to be reminded of why you broke up
It's best to have the mentality that you're done. Adios. Never to see again.

>>33346148
People are like that. Convenience culture has killed emotional connections.

>>33346212
She love bombed me which is also a trait of both
She kept trying to keep up the guise of us being perfect partners despite talking to other guys which is a trait of bpd
She got easily infatuated which is a sign of bpd
The only bpd trait she didn't show was splitting

>>33346225
>It takes time for your absence to be felt
I suppose so. On one hand I feel like she does want to reconnect eventually, she's still sharing her location with me, shares pinterest boards for clothing, marriage stuff, etc (and she goes on pinterest everyday) still wears the jewlery I gave her, didn't ask for any of her stuff back etc, but I feel so forgotten about

>>33346235
Whenever I see these i wonder if it actually didn't work because the other person was obsessed with disregarding everything their partner felt or did as mental illness. Still that sounds shitty sorry to hear that anon.

>>33346262
NTA but I’m glad someone else can see that this weird trend of diagnosing your partners is retarded

Dude if I get my to do list done I'm gonna be so happy

>>33346225
Idk man, I just wish she would tell me "I love you, I'll run to you as soon as I figure everything out, but right now, I have to grow on my own for a while". If she would've said that, I'd feel 10x better, if those are her intentions, which with every passing day seem more and more unlikely

Well, I got a job, it's not bad after all, but I still feel like I depend on my family. I mean, I'm fine living with them and I should listen to them and be a good son to avoid problems. I try to save up and find a place to get away from them. It's not that I hate them, but I don't think they'll ever understand me, nor do I want them to. I just put up with them until that happens. I guess that's part of growing up.

I'm tired of giving excuses to shit tier human beings

>raise 3 obese children
>be the only child that grew up not being obese
>++20 years later
>still see purchases of nonsensical junk food
>thinks cooking rice in a pot over a stove instead of a rice cooker is the game changer
I don't think this is the problem. rice is not the problem

How does one go from raising children with weight which has no past (fat since their infancy) and continue making these food purchase choices? There's only two ways of going about this... its either a conscious choice or it isn't thought about at all. I'm not sure which is worse


Lets see if more retarded sugar snack and drinks are purchased.

>>33346209
Ah I understand. She probably does need some space right now but I'd be concerned about her too. Maybe just send her a text every other day or two, tell her that you're available if she needs you and encourage her again to see a therapist. I understand it's a frustrating situation but these things need patience. I hope you two work through this, take care anon

>>33346379
That is a great way to get a restraining order.

>>33346397
Don't be stupid. No one's gonna give you a restraining order because you're concerned for a person after a mental health crisis.

The faster you confess to me. The faster all the bad things STOP happening to you...

>>33346445
confess what?

Pink switchblades and purple blood

>>33346466
You're trippin b.

20f with OCD looking for opinions/advice, preferably from someone who's not a pedophile or /b/tard. i know 4chan is the worst place to go for advice on this particular topic considering its userbase, but i'm desperate for a response
i found porn early and masturbated to many disturbing things in my youth/teens. the day i regret most in my life and think back to constantly is when i sought out and masturbated to CP once when i was 14. i never did this again as i found such content disgusting rather than attractive and had only masturbated to it because it was extreme/taboo. the masturbation material i consumed mellowed out quickly as i got older, but i feel like this mistake has permanently tainted me and the guilt has affected every aspect of my life ever since, especially my nonexistent social life
i confessed this (and every other disgusting detail about the things I masturbated to) to my mother, but she didn't think it was that bad. i would like to get a third opinion though. how bad is it really? should i forgive and/or forget this? and if someone you know confessed such a thing to you (try to imagine you're a normal person), how would you feel about it/them?

>>33346445
This reminds me to get another evil eye bracelet from my spiritual shop

>>33346490
Anon, cops understand you are human. There are instances where a cop would forgive a wife for stabbing her husband on the shoulder during an argument at times. You were in a gray area. This is all a part of being human. The law in the U.S. is supposed to reflect being humane. You were a dumb 14 year old at the time too. Just do not do it again. This reminds me of a time when I was 14 trying to shoplift a piece of candy at a 7-11 that the clerk just stood over me and I put the candy back and moved on. Now the moment you step over making human mistakes into being inhumane, that is when you are getting yourself into some serious trouble.

>>33346490
I am a normal man and if you were a friend who came to me with this crippling guilt you still feel after all these years I would tell you that that's proof of you not being that perverted kid anymore. A lot of teens go through that dark phase of looking for the most fucked up thing they can get ahold of whether that be drugs, porn, whatever. It's part of growing up for a lot of us. Forgive yourself, your brain has changed a lot since then and you're barely even aware of what being a human is at 14. Let the darkness of the past guide you into the light in your 20's. Mom's right.

I broke her

>>33346543
>>33346545
thank you so very much for your replies, your kindness has moved me to tears. i wasn't expecting such forgiving and thoughtful responses. i don't mean to excuse myself completely, but i'll take your advice and try to move on, and when i start spiraling again i'll look back to your responses. again, thank you two so much, you wonderful anons.

I need to stop writing her full on essays about bullshit that doesn't matter while she's asleep

>>33346660
No, you need a girlfriend who accepts your essays and sees them as novels she loves reading. If she does not find them to be good reading and instead gives th asshole page of words look, forget about her.

FUCK THIS SCUKS WHY DOES SHE HAVE TO PLAY WITH ME LIKE THIS? HOW CAN SOMEONE DATE ANOTHER PERSON, SHARE SO MANY FUN AND INTIMATE MOMENTS, TALK FOR THOUSANDS OF HOURS AND THEN LEAVE THEM IN AN INSTANT? FUCK YOUR CROCODILE TEARS. Nothing is going well, my crypto portfolio is going up - don't care. Work is going well - don't care. Guitar playing has gotten noticeably better in a short period of time - don't care. I don't care about anything, everything seems ultimately pointless if I can't have her in my life. Before we dated, I thought that getting in these thought loops was retarded, and it is, but I can't help it. She made my life so much better, so much happier, we had so much to look forward to. Now I wait. I made my move, I reached out and she said to wait. I did this to myself, I said I would. I just wish she would tell me what's happening. I know where she is and I can guess what she's doing but I have no idea what she's thinking or how she's feeling. All I hope for is that she's okay and that she's thinking of me the same way I'm thinking of her now. Sad, dejected, a little angry but nowhere near angry enough to diminish my love for the only woman who has ever cared and the only one that ever listened

>>33346684
Damn
Yeah

>>33346727
Told you you should have made it clear that you do chose her and that she is not just a burden but I guess it was too little, too late. Hope you learned your lesson about gratitude if you ever get another chance at love.

>>33346739
How did I not make it clear? I said that I love her and that I'd be there for her. You have the reading comprehension of a toddler, kys nigger

>>33346778
You are the retard who‘s gf of five years said to take a break, right?

>>33346781
Yes. I reached back out, told her that I love her and that I'd like to see her because I have a lot more to say that I think would be better said in person. She replied:
>Could we wait a bit longer? I'm not ready for this right now

>>33346789
Anon, life does not live by promises all the time. You can promise yourself you'll get 20 dollars, but the moment you go to a million it is something completely different. Likewise, with this girl you like, you can't ever know truly if she will come back. Read how she intiates with you.

>>33346789
In that case you are dumber than previously assumed since you think that anything you do or say could still turn the situation around. You have years of making her feel like she is not good enough and a burden. A few hollow words, now that you suddenly realize how much she did add to your life, are not only hollow but downright insulting.

>>33346802
>Read how she intiates with you
Like in the future? What do you mean by that?
>>33346805
You're such a bad troll

>>33346813
NTA but that anon is right. Your entitlement is gross and now that she’s escaped your orbit, you’re crying 24/7.

>>33346813
>anything I don‘t like hearing is a troll
If I was her, I would have blocked you long ago, lol.

>>33346813
Is she texting you back, calling you, is the moment you call or text her number it goes straight to voicemail, are you unable to find her social media account, when you text her have you noticed one checkmark appearing, when you see her again is she purposely trying to ignore you like you are a ghost; things like this.

>>33346834
Adding on to this, women are direct anon. You need to let go of the myth of the shy wallflower. She needs to be as assertive as you are about her for her to like you, period. This guessing game shit, is all retarded bullshit. You were bought on this bullshit from anime that had female characters gushing over men going all in their head about if they should go talk to them, women in reality are a Hell of a lot more assertive than you think about men. Maybe not to an extreme, but there definately should be some.

>>33346834
I see. So far she's been responsive. I just can't understand how she hasn't deleted/gotten rid of everything that would remind her of me but then she's keeping her distance from me for now. Care to speculate?

>>33345462 (OP)
started call center job, idk half of what im supposed to know, but im already in debt and if i drop out of there im in deep shit. i got a callback in an hour where im pretty sure i fucked up so hard that i lost the customer

>>33346860
I've seen this before and as much as I don't want to be the one to tell you this, she's probably just trying to find the courage to leave for good and she doesn't have it right now

>>33346860
nta but because she fucking told you she needs a break? has she told you she hates your guts and wants nothing to do with you ever again? no. thats why she has not acted like that yet. has she told you that everything is fine and you can go back to pretend like nothing ever happened? no. thats why she is not acting like that yet. she is about to decide which way to go, which is why she has not gone all the way in either direction. but your whiny and clingy behavior rn will likely push her to the first option soon enough.

>>33346883
i say "im sorry" so much that by the time a lady called to ask for a refund on her late payment fee because she missed the payment because her husband passed, my sorry felt so fake

Found another interesting meaning with my sacred number

I don't feel very water soluble

I'm depressed and have no drive. I already feel old at 30 and can't imagine a good future for myself. It's hard to get out of bed anymore. There is nothing I look forward to or am interested in in life. I have lists of things I should be doing each day, and things I should avoid doing, but I constantly fall back into doing the bad things and neglect the good things. I can't even get through one full day of only doing the good and avoiding the bad.

I've been struggling to find work for months and if it goes on for too much longer I won't be able to pay my mortgage payments anymore. And the decision to buy this place was a horrible one driven by a woman who I didn't even have yet, and it all fell apart anyway, so I feel like a complete fool.

I hate being a wageslave, but I feel like work might be the only thing that would make me feel needed anywhere, so I'm still applying to jobs when they appear, but opportunities are few and far between and competition is high.

It feels like life is hell and that I've just done all the bad parts. School, military, college, work. They all felt like boxes I was checking to finally get to my real life, but it never started and I don't know how to start it. It makes me wonder if everyone else is in similar situations but they're just happy with it somehow. I feel broken. I feel like I'm too far gone in terms of nasty things I've seen on this site. I have no friends. I have nobody to talk to. I don't even know where to find people to talk to in an online setting, let alone real life. I just don't know anything anymore.

/end blog

I just saw Sofia Vergara's 53rd bday pics and i think that the meme wall of aging have been obliterated.

What's stopping your ex wife from using the alimony from transforming herself and reinvest all that shit to OF?

Could you please describe the manner in which Jahosaphat jumped?

>>33347131
Self respect

>Talk to friends at work about my crush because I can't contain my feelings anymore
>They nod and move on to a new subject, I drop it since they're clearly not comfortable talking about it
>Get back to work this week
>Feel like my crush is avoiding me
>Her coworkers aren't talking much either
>A lot of the regulars I'd chat with are out or not talking either

I logically think it's a matter of perception but I can't help but feel in the back of my mind they all know and are disgusted with me. As if I've crossed a line and everything's ruined. I just want so bad someone to connect with, to be able to talk to and tell everything, to scream it from the rooftops.

>>33345655
So basically you and your gf?

>>33345696
Same but it's a he.

>>33345462 (OP)
I cannot feel my fucking chest in bench presses. I'm going to have to bring my friend with me to the gym so he can look at my boobs and make sure I'm activating them. Otherwise at this point, I fear I'm going to have gigantic triceps with man boobs.

Fuck you bipolar bpd attention whore demon zoomerettes and assholes. Also fuck you for behaving like one.

>>33345630
Cringe is the failure of the intended emotion that makes the audience uncomfortable. E.g. making an anime AMV about your mom's death, telling your Jewish coworker a holocaust joke on Jan 27, or shitting during sex.
If he messed up the song then yes, it would be cringe. But if he sang it well, that's just funny, that is not cringe. For cringe also has a skill aspect to it.

ok...

>>33347233
Be friends with the person first. Just because you're crushing doesn't mean you instantly start saying I love u etc. U gotta be friends first and get to know people first!

>>33347252
Retarded

>>33347290
go to bed

You know how, like, Jahosaphat jumps? Mario too

>>33347323
I've been friendly with them for about three years. I used to not like them like that, but the more we talked, the more I realized I enjoyed their company beyond simple friendship. It was about the time we were talking about personal things like family, what we wanted from the future, the thing we believed, that sort of thing my opinion started to change because we were just so similar.

I'm so over men
I only like one man in the world and id instantly dump him if he stopped kissing my ass
I see a hot guy and I just want to pump and dump him
I was able to help an elderly woman yesterday and it made my entire week better. Maybe I should become an aid for an elderly woman. I hate when people abuse elders or speak to them in a baby voice. I think they have a lot to show us even if they need assistance

It's so annoying feeling lovesick when you outwardly appear perfectly eligible but are internally a fiasco. I'd love to date around but I'd basically kill myself to avoid the stress of the mere thought of going on an actual date.

I finally I followed her on social media, feels weird, but I know it's for the best, I need peace of mind.

>>33347824
you mean "unfallow"?

>>33345678
Make sure you invite us to the wedding

Men and women
Would you let a libertarian fuck your woman/man in the asshole

>>33347880
Nigga what

>>33347882
You heard me

>>33347885
Well in a true libertarian society I wouldn’t “let” you do anything, you’d simply take their asshole as you wish
So no

Wait wrong thread
My bad, that ones on me

>>33347064
Try something more acidic.

>>33347081
>I already feel old at 30
I don't have the time to really help you out with the rest of your issue you listed here, but I did want to tell you, if it's any consolation, you are a young-ass babby.

>>33347233
How well do you know these coworkers? It's very possible that they told her. Confiding in coworkers with something they can gossip to other coworkers about like that is a huge misstep, for future reference. Tell your friends outside of work, or if you don't have friends, just post about it in one of these threads.

>>33347777
>I hate when people abuse elders or speak to them in a baby voice
Only assholes do that. Also, checked

>>33347890
That's not a true libertarian society, you retard. Libertarian philosophy is liberty as long as you're not impeding on the rights of others. You can't just assrape people as you please.

>>33347938
>You can't just assrape people as you please.
They are free to stop me if they can

Had a dream my ex made up a bunch of shit for social media to look good and carried on like nothing happened
The shit part was that I was still stalking her socials

When you see a woman's true from then it's over?

Dont feel like its worthy of starting a new thread but I only recently heard my voice on a recording and really came to understand just how much higher and nasaly my voice sounds to other people than it does to me.

I am looking for a vocal training routine. Something that has me doing exercizes for 10 minutes or so every day to help me lower my voice and also just get a better sound to it and also probably improved anunciation to remove my southern accent as well.

Anybody have a good little program like a pdf or a youtube video on this?

I'm so fucking tired of being lonely. Not just romantic love but platonic love too

>>33348003 Perhaps you aren't the problem. Honestly, mainstream society—the "normies"—are incredibly boring. You might have an unrecognized talent. Seek out more eccentric people, those with an intense, almost obsessive interest in your passions. They're interesting, and they will appreciate you.

It's not going to work
I know that now
It's way too complicated and she has nowhere near the same vibe for me now as she did during the first couple weeks
So why the fuck can't I let the idea and feeling go, it's only serving to hurt me and keep me stuck

I've become such an awful person that I can't really expect to date normal guys at this point without keeping huge secrets about myself. I am afraid of ending up alone. Idk I want to find someone as fucked up as me but who's still a good person, but anyone at my level has some kind of massive baggage attached. My dating history is a trainwreck of trannies, a gambler, and a cuck. (I broke up with these dudes once I found out). I'm only 18 and I swear I'm too far gone already

>>33348112
lol did you bang a black guy in front of the cuck? Did you top or bottom the tranny? How the fuck do you have these life experiences at 18

>>33348122
Nah I broke up with the cuck after i found out because I'm not into that. Also because he posted my nudes on the dark web?? Plus I'm kind of racist. And I topped the tranny before he came out as a girl and I had to be like "Uhhh I'm not gay"

And I think I just attract the wrong types of people. Something about me has cursed me to only be able to date people with questionable sanity.

>>33348030
Don't let good memories keep you stuck
In my last relationship, my ex switched up after a few months
I went on with it without realizing she wasn't that into me anymore

>>33348112
Just chalk it up to being young and not being able to see the signs of a good partner yet
The only time you're really fucked is when you start doing the degenerate shit or fuck too many people

>>33347931
The two I told aren't the type to say anything, or at least I'd consider it so unlikely that it's a non-factor. They don't know her well enough to come up out of the blue and say it, nor do they talk to that part of the staff like I do. Even among their other usuals I haven't noticed anything and I'm almost 100% certain the females in their department would be pumping me for details if they knew.

I'm pretty sure it's paranoia and my own anxiety over knowing I'm attracted but trying to hide it, but because it's in the realm of possibility I can't rule it out. I don't know how she'd act if she knew either, if she'd try and break contact to discourage it, ask about it directly, or just say she's not interested.

Just unfollowed Babylon Bee on xitter.
I can't take the neo-con cuckery anymore.
Enough is enough.

I was watching a guy I know (Not really a friend but an acquaintance) pursue a girl he liked. She's "married but getting a divorce" (Her words, I heard them myself) and does send texts to this guy, but I've also heard her call him a bit stalker-ish. He's done things like brought her flowers and that sort of thing.

I sort of want to pull this guy aside and tell him to dial it back before he gets in too deep, but at the same time I think it's an interesting study on relationships and what pushing things too far will look like and play out as. I think it's also probably a good learning experience for him if it doesn't ruin his life since he's in his late 20s.

He's kind of ugly and the girl is really hot, but I've seen pairs further apart in looks too. Maybe she actually is reciprocating and I'm too jaded to accept it, or maybe she's leading him on.

>>33348443
So I just checked and their most recent post was:
>Frightening Rise In Anti-Semitism Blamed On The Jews
Making jokes about Jews is a neocon position now?

>>33348155
>And I think I just attract the wrong types of people. Something about me has cursed me to only be able to date people with questionable sanity.
Yes. That something is your underdeveloped prefrontal cortex.

>>33347943
Oh fuck

>>33348470
perhaps she just wants the male attention while feeling isolated from her pending divorce, if so he's in for disappointment.

>>33348488
If you have read their other brained "jokes" about I / P discourse you would realize they are not making it in a "based" way like you are interpreting.
>Ilhan Omar Announces Engagement To Grok
>'I Don't Know If America Should Be Involved In Another Middle Eastern War,' Says Raging Antisemite
>'Israel Has The Right To Defend Itself,' Says Pro-War Neocon Zionist Shill
>Ted Cruz Destroyed In Interview As He's Unable To Name Ayatollah's Favorite Starter Pokemon
>Global Community Condemns Israel For Attacking Peace-Loving Nation Of Iran
Ton of kvetching boomer nonsense.
Also please scroll down instead of just looking at the top result. It is mostly a sea of unfunny trash now.

>>33347992

No, you it means you should've figured it out a long time ago but you're too full of yourself, and too superficial, to matter at all now. You failed her. Think of it as the ultimate shit test that you didn't even know you were in.

You're you, you know what you did to me. I know what you did to me, yet you still have some strange belief that you're the moral authority, here? What you did to me is unforgiveable and you DARE to judge me for normal shit?

>>33348691
You started it.

Imagine "falling in love" with someone's body and thinking that is love. People are really this stupid.

>>33348697
Grow up, you're the reason why I can't elaborate here. No, I did not start it, you don't know me. You come across as an immature child, with no life, judging other people here all day.

>>33348704
Ironic.

>>33346445
You're blind to your own existence.

>>33348705
Not at all. Predictable. I really didn't elaborate because I knew you'd be in the bushes ready to pounce & hate on everyone. Sad existence but I know you must be miserable inside to be the way you are.

>>33348744
Careful what you wish for, you might receive.

I miss being around non-judgmental people that just look at others, with respect and love. I feel like 4chan is the opposite, full of terrible evil mentally ill psychopaths that aren't capable of having empathy for others. I imagine it's because they grew up with critical, evil parents but at some point you need to wake up and be an adult.

>>33348748
It's called being smart, or perceptive, and observing what happens every time someone posts something here. You need to see a shrink.

>>33348763
Why are you so scared of mirrors?

>>33348758
social rejects tend to project their insecurity outwards in the form of malice and vitriol, their cruelty is a perfect reflection of what they feel they have received. I almost feel sorry for a lot of people here because I too had to grow out of that...almost. They're still cunts.

>>33348779
You want a medal?

Is it dumb to go back to an ex that cheated on you if you felt bad about other things you did in the relationship and wanted to make amends?

>>33348779
I don't have hope for any of them. It's clear that they they hate themselves. It's not normal to approach every stranger with hate. I highly doubt they'd say it in person, most are cowardly keyboard psycho. They'd pee their pants with fear, in person, imagine living that life?

>>33348810
What do you think makes someone end up like this?

I feel like society is completely going to collapse. You can't even go anywhere without randomly getting stabbed, these days.

Alright I get it now. She started dating someone else
Idk why the fuck she'd stay talking with me daily and sending the occasional flirty pic while that energy and attention was being shifted elsewhere and I could feel it
Fuck I mean it was probably never gonna be anything anyway
I'm far away and still on my come-up so someone close and established obviously makes way more sense
But fucking hell, how hard we clicked and connected and flirted and yearned for each other those first few weeks
Can't get over that
She obviously already has
I really need to detach now because it's over and for whatever reason she's willing to breadcrumb me along while being mostly focused elsewhere. I don't want that. I need to move on and find someone who actually wants me. Probably need to work on myself more first. And not get connected to someone far away again. Fuck.

>>33348826

Idle hands are the devil's playthings. I suppose that is part of it. I sincerely think they're insecure and jealous of everyone around them. They post evil crap here after being upset watching the good people of the world have great times together. They feel it's unobtainable to them, and it is. A person who is hateful, jealous and angry all the time, has a hard time meeting people and making friends.

In the end, you have to live with yourself and your thoughts. Even if you are too unaware, too evil, to even comprehend your own existence and the pain you bring to others, I do believe you'll have to pay for it in time. No one really gets away with anything in this life and I'm glad that I don't have to deliver the pain.

>>33348782
boo hoo

>>33348795
yes, it's dumb. two wrongs don't make a right ya know. do better in the next relationship with someone who hasn't cheated.

>>33348886
miserable people live miserable lives, their karma is having to live the nightmare of their own life every day.

>>33346883
just came across what probably is an en masse breach of contract by this company towards its customers in a call. idk if i handled in a call that won't make me get fired. especially because in the q&a section at the end of the day i asked about it because i was super confused.

i went "customer said it was a breach of contract, is there anything in t&c that covers this" "no" "so it is a breach of contract? wouldn't touch on this with the customer" "yes"

so now im marked as fuck, not only for firing but just morally i guess because im not whistleblowing

>>33348913
That's true, they don't have ability to appreciate the good in life, they don't have the ability to be grateful.

I really like this guy I've met online, I just genuinely think he is a good soul, interesting, loving, etc. I 'know' him just from voice/video chat in a group. I never viewed him in a sexual way, I never thought, I'll try to hook up with him one day, in person. He was married, that's maybe why but his wife passed away from cancer. I didn't see him for several years but always remember him fondly, someone told him I missed him. I finally talked to him and some of what he wrote could be considered flirty. He was kind to wife, he really loved her, I could see that.

Why do I feel so upset about talking to him? It just feels so wrong, on every level.

My deepest secret is I don't understand why men like me so much. I remember, long ago, I met this sociopath who manipulated women but couldn't manipulate me. He liked me but I didn't like his bad character, right from the start. He had this one woman wrapped around his finger, and he and this woman, harassed me together. She had a friend that said she was protecting from me, she didn't want him to get hurt.

I think maybe it's only certain people who are strongly drawn to me but apparently they are. I never asked to be viewed as seductive, sexy blah blah, but that is how I'm viewed. I don't feel that way inside but that is how I'm perceived. It's very confusing being perceived like that. Like, what did I even do to you?

>>33348619
I don't really follow them so I just read their most recent post, but based on the ones you're providing:
1. Unfunny, but not really Neocon
2. I'll get banned for racism if I say my opinion of this one here
3. Sounds based, but after 2, it sounds like it's trying to appease the people who 2 (rightfully) annoyed
4. See 2.
5. See 4.
>Also please scroll down instead of just looking at the top result. It is mostly a sea of unfunny trash now.
I'd rather not. As I said, I don't follow them and your elaboration was sufficient.

>>33348764
Because of Bloody Mary

I don't care about who you think I am, how you perceive and define me, doesn't matter, because I'm confident and secure in my being. I hope that helps.

I'm tired of the fucking angry temper tantrums, the slamming of doors, the fact I cannot trust my partner with my life. I've never been around someone so selfish. I'm tired of asking for help and then have them make me feel like it's such a fucking bother. I've never had anyone in my life treat me as if I'm fucking stupid. I'm far from stupid. I guess if you are coddled your whole life and have never been held accountable for your own actions this is what you turn into. I've put a lot of time and energy into this person and they treat me as if they really don't give a shit. Do not get married. I repeat do not get married. It is the one mistake you'll make that will have a hard time wiping your hands clean of.

"Don't think about work while at home" is difficult when my boss messages me about customer complaints. I admit, five in a four hour window is fucking insane. I don't know how that happened; I'll have to look at the complaints myself next shift. But yo, boss, look at who you scheduled. I know I'm the PIC in those four hours, but look at who I had to manage. There was no way orders were going to come out fast, correct, and clean. Pick two of those three at best.

>>33349078
Should break up - not because your partner is selfish, and childish, but because you both are. Neither of you should be in a relationship if you don't try to understand your partner's feeling and concerns. I get tired of people pretending that there is only one side to their situation and their partner is the only one to blame. I've lived enough years to know that it's hardly ever true. Psychopathic behavior is blaming other people for everything, while pretending you're innocent. That is weakness.

The way that you word it "I've put a lot of time and energy into this person" isn't something a well-adjusted person would write. Love is not transactional.

anon from >>33346490 back to get one more thing off my chest
after that post i've been ruminating over my (only) other encounter with cp(?) that i originally didn't think was important enough to mention, but am now convinced is somewhat worse... i was masturbating to rather nefarious loli on pixiv (under the ペド tag of all things), and clicked on a link in the comments that lead to a page with images that were so blurred i couldn't tell if it was 3dcg or actual cp. i had already been masturbating and ended up cooming to it while knowing it might have been cp. i was either late 15 or early 16 when i did this but i feel like i really should have known and done better by then. i'll probably get over it, but i feel bad...

I need advice. Currently been engaged for 5 months, and am 18 about to start college. My college is really cheap because of a bunch of scholarships that I won, but my fiance moved to a different state to pursue his career. He tells me if I don't move up there before I finish college I don't love him and when I told him news about how little my tuition would be he said he felt indifferent about it. He works a high stress job and is lonely and I get it, but I feel like it's ridiculous for him to not even be happy for me. We had agreed to do long distance before he moved, but now he's changed his mind I guess. Do I stay with him and see how things go or leave him? He's been starting arguments every day for a week or two, we've been long distance for a month.

The situationship pairbonded with me

Trying really fucking hard to not doom
It was so much easier when I never tried
It was so much less painful to stay in apathy
I'm losing the belief that I can make it
I don't think I was ever supposed to
Some people just don't
What I thought was real I think were just comforting delusions I was clinging onto because my ego desperately needed them to not fucking cave in on itself
And now that they're fading I got nothing to hold me together

>>33349174
I hate you

Damn, love is blind
My ex was just as immature and passive aggressive
I never saw it while I was dating her though

I created a twitter account just so I could use grok to write really specific erotica that appeals to my sensibilities. It won't write anything explicit but it's good enough for me

>>33349495
>it wont write anything explicit

Why the fuck not. Twitter allows the posting of hard core porn. I thought the whole point of grok was to be the not cucked ai

>>33349499
A great question. If there's a trick to doing it, I have no idea, but it seems to be more pliable than chatgpt.

>Get told I'm rude, disrespectful, and angry all the time
>Okay I'll try to be a better person
>People start getting mouthy and rude with me
>Just try to be patient and understanding with them
>They keep acting that way

Why do people take kindness and politeness for granted when we exist in a world in a constant state of injustice and violence? You'd think it would be worth more than gold

My dog shit in the house yesterday and she's usually good about never doing that. I think it's because my parent's have left for the weekend and she's upset they're not here despite being close to my dog. I let my anger get the better of me and I hit her. Not a lot or very hard, but I did for pooping in the house and I immediately regret it. It makes me feel like I am becoming more like my dad. He hit me when I was a kid. I try and keep my anger in check and I failed. I feel completely ashamed. My dog legit loves me and is always excited to see me and now she's clearly been affected by it. I'm not gonna do it again. I swear that on myself. I'm trying to do better by her today by petting her and being softer and telling her I'm sorry, even if she can't understand it. I think I am a worthless human being.

>>33349541
>Immediate retrospect
>Regret doing it
>Repairs the situation

Your trying Anon, most people don't or they justify their shit actions instead of facing it

>>33349550
Thanks, I really appreciate that, anon. I've felt angry at her before, such as sometimes when she doesn't listen, but I always kept my cool. But idk why, seeing the big shit she took, having to clean it up, it just got my boiling. I'm doing my best. I really am. I genuinely love my dog.

>>33349556
I'm not a therapist or whatever but I think you should do some investigating to why that particularly set you off, hope everything goes alright

>>33349562
Yeah, I will when I see my therapist next.

The world gets gayer by the day. Who the fuck is Peter Thiel and what is his problem? Transhumanism? Is he retarded?

I DONT WANT TO FUCKING TALK

>>33349667
Same

>>33349667
My pad, Peter.

I need to return to my creativity and catch up on my reading for the summer. Fuck the rest.

>>33349023
His wife died. Not his dick. And im sure he loved her and misses her but he cant put his life on hold forever.

I'm genuinely terrified about the future. People are becoming more and more radicalized. I went to go donate plasma today and this fat black lady at the check in. I'm pretty sure she said something regarding my heritage (I'm mixed but I look Hispanic) and I just got up and left. I don't want to pick a side. I just wanna feel safe for once.

>>33349857
No you didnt.

Is it bad if my partner's anxious attachment style gives me anxiety because she makes me feel bad for needing space and not texting constantly all day everyday?

So after years of trying out different things, all I actually needed to do was change one stupid little number? After changing it, everything is how it should be. How I wanted it to be.

Fuck me. That's actually really depressing. I could have got things done 5-10 years ago if I'd known. Better late than never, I guess.

Obviously this makes life easier going forward, but just how many hours have I wasted? How much needless frustration?

Also means my late night was a complete waste of time.

Fuck me.

My mother keeps asking me whether I’m gay because I’ve never had a gf or talked to her about any interest in girls.
I’m actually an ultra gooner but act pretty much asexual around my parents because they raised me very religiously, never showed affection towards each other, and made me uncomfortable with expressing any intimate desires around them. We don’t even say “I love you” to each other lol no shit I’m not gonna talk to you about girls. Pisses me off when it’s their fault for not facilitating an environment where I’d be comfortable talking to them with that sort of thing.
I just don’t have a gf bc I’m short, have an ugly face, and have poor social skills

I only have two friends left and I hate both of them.

>one is a literal cuckold who has his wifes name tatooed on him and she cheats on him and bosses him around and spends all his money on door dash. Just the absolute most beta fag ever
>the other just thinks he is a bad ass despite living in the same shitty apartment for the last 12 years and having the same frumpy ass girlfriend and really never doing anything cool or interesting at all and actively discouraging me from doing anything cool myself

I am very away of them and also I can feel that if people are your friends its impossible not to be influenced by them and they are definitely making me less cool and based just by osmosis. However not having any friends is also lame and gay. So I will probably keep being friends with them and focus on just hanging out for occasional sports nights and shit

I'm wasting the best years of my life, studying day in and day out (no nights with friends, no girlfriend, no gaming or playing guitar, just studying), for what? To be so tired and stressed that I can't study anymore. I did 2 exams this year, and I can't do any more. While last 3 years I did enough exams to not pay any taxes, this year I will have to pay since I can't graduate. I will have to ask my (old) parents to help me out, and I'm sincerely thinking of dropping out and finding some no experience job. My only "job" was to study and graduate in time, and I can't do it. Fuck me.

>>33350074
Oh also on top of that even if I did get a gf I would not be comfortable enough to tell her and would consciously try to conceal the fact for as long as possible lol

I think I'll just continue to be crazy but never express it outside of here.
Good luck.

I'm torn. new girl who doesn't show much affection and I haven't sealed the deal with in any way yet but is young and pretty and hasn't been around town, or girl I dated for a short time years and years ago who has an older boyfriend who is basically gay and let's her fuck whoever she wants and wants me involved (said she and I can be sexually exclusive, no clue what's wrong with this man). Obviously, she's dark sided. older but still looks good. lays on the affection and attention. very torn. I feel like I'm choosing between staying single and having some kind of fuckbuddy which I think is morally wrong, or going after young love that so far has given me nothing emotional or physical, and would end up sort of long distance eventually too. what should I do?

I feel like I will never be loved by a women because of my self harm scars on my arms :(

>my mom was married twice and ultimately had 6 kids
>she was an insecure compulsive cheater, emotionally neurotic and abusive
>she permits my stepdad to molest me, pretending it wasn’t happening
>i grow up wildly hyper sexual and fail to maintain appropriate boundaries in relationships with friends
>in an effort to avoid being like her, i avoid all romantic and sexual relationships
>lose my virginity at 28 in a reckless way, basically was a complete joke
>the experience feels like connection and closure i’d been searching for my entire life, genuinely had no idea sex would feel like that, that it would be like a fucking soul bond
>emotionally horrified by such intense intimacy, feel claustrophobic and sabotaged it
>not attracted to anyone else over a year later

I think I’m gonna die alone.

>>33350217
if young love would give you nothing why even consider it? fuck that

I'm such a goddamn failure I'm the anon from >>33345451 and >>33350299 and I cut again after saying I wouldn't. The other anon who tried to help me yesterday must be disappointed. I'm sorry. It was a small cut but still a cut. I just felt really lonely and did the eyebrow razor thing. I feel so weird right now. I can't believe I cut myself again for the first time in years. It's small so nobody should notice but I wear short sleeves at work. FUCK FUCK I'm so lonely and a failure

>>33349972
Yeah it's bad but that's common as hell with anxious attachment
It's suffocating
I know this because I have it
You know it's irrational but you can't stop or control the feeling it fucking sucks
I'm in therapy trying to deal with it, hopefully you can get them to do the same

>>33350000
>GLOBALISTS HATE THIS ONE SIMPLE TRICK
>GO FROM BRAIN DAMAGED TO ROUTINE MANAGED
>GIVE ME A (YOU) AND LOCK IN TODAY!

>>33350356
because I eventually want to settle down and start a family and I'm almost 30 :'(

>>33345462 (OP)
This isn't a good place to get anything off of your chest, the people in adv, lgbtq and the pony section are the worst. They will ignore you, erase your posts and if they bother talking to you it's just to cyberbully you.

>>33350370
anon you will be miserable. Be sure to choose someone who you can be yourself and feel comfortable with. Don’t settle down with someone you don’t feel good about. You will end up resenting them, creating new miserable humans because their parents don’t get along and eventually you will leave them when someone younger and more attractive captures your eyes

>>33350367
Appreciate the reply. She's been in therapy but it still happens. Meanwhile I'm made to feel like the villain if I simply don't talk for a bit. I hope things get better for you anon.

im very depressed and suicidal and the fact that i goon to latina porn every day may have something to do with it

>>33350433
how the fuck is that correlated?

>>33350395
we haven't gotten to the point of sleeping together yet, we are compatible otherwise so I haven't been rushing it. I don't have any reason to believe she's a prude yet, honestly think she's just a little nervous.

i lost 50 pounds still got another 60 to go but man...why do i still feel and look the same.people say i look smaller but i kinda feel the same i see people lose 20 and there is a major difference...i just hope after i lose the last 60 i can finally feel normal...

>>33350438
He has a deficiency in latina gf

I went outside today. Normally I leave my phone at home--even though it's ancient, can't call pr text, needs wifi, and the browser is so out of date it can't be used to post on 4chan anymore--I brought it with me to take pictures. I'm not a photographer or anything but I've been casually taking pictures of objects and nature for years now, and when I look back at old pictures I feel things. I took pictures of what little foliage was left after the greedy bastard that owns this place demolished all the nature; it was fun nonetheless. Saw some birds, a bunny, and some pretty flowers but not what I went looking for. After dinner I went out again. I wanted to take a picture of the sunset with the lake in the foreground. I was disappointed to find out that it's not even visible anymore. Despite that I went looking for what I failed to find earlier and found it! The Asuka car. I don't even like Evangellion but when I first saw it yesterday it put a smile on face. I really admire when people proudly display what they're into and getting a few pictures of it for later was nice. I think it'll be up there with that on picture I took during a snow storm during my brief stay on college campus. I don't think anyone saw me but if they did I hope they just think I thought it was cool and I wasn't a thief.

That was the most confusing start of my period in my life wtf... I thought I was over throwing up. My heart rate was elevated all day. Extreme migrane to the point of tears. Food tasted disgusting even after brushing my teeth. I quietly pondered if I was having a heart attack and couldn't feel the chest pains. At no time before discovering that I was bleeding did I feel cramps. Am I falling out of my body? I'm so confused.

I feel so completely hopeless and I think I might try ending myself again soon. I feel very alone, my family is awful and all split apart. I have a couple of friends that don't care for me as much as I care for them. Even if I could find a relationship, who wants to be with someone who has no reliable family and no real friends, it's like proof that I'm an unlikeable freak. Good things that happen don't make me feel good. I can't see any future where I actually manage to change and be a better person than I am now. The only good things that I have in my life are that I like my job and I adopted a cat a few months ago. I struggled through life just to work a job and have a cat. I'm a pathetic loser and I want to stop existing.

>>33347923
Thank you, friend.

>>33346594
fuck, i feel like since i excluded the second mistake from my initial post that makes all the advice i got invalid. the moment i get reassured about one thing, another thing pops up and makes me super anxious again... i know that's how ocd is, but i'm so tired of this. with >>33349143 in mind, how bad am i? do i still deserve to forgive myself? i know this sounds extremely needy, but i am panicking and have zero ability to realistically evaluate myself in this state

Friends, girls, and family have now respectively told me something along the lines of not using my potential, that i could be so much more, and to get out my comfort zone. Im trying in diff aspects of life but not sure how or what to do more. Feels bad man

going from having someone to talk to everyday to not having anyone to talk to at all sucks

>>33350000
What number?

>>33350769
0 to 1.

>>33350763
I know you're an attention slut, it's obvious

>>33350786
I meant what was the numbers use

>>33350763
Yeah anon :( loneliness suck so much

How do you tell if a friend group even wants you there in the first place? months ago the group felt okay but now I feel like they never want to do anything when I'm there but the moment I'm not there they all of a sudden want to do things and talk more often.

>>33350456
Good luck with your weight loss journey, Anon
>>33349667
Same. I think I don't even deserve a voice anymore because nothing comes out of my mouth but venom. At least with writing, text, or thinking I have better control.
>>33349695
Good luck. what are you reading?

Imagine getting close to my ex's kid, trying to be a father to her, and never seeing her again

None of you have any actual real problems, you're all just immature entitled babies that like to cry because you're weak. You all need to be sent of to war and I'm completely serious.

I will remember you forever. Immortalized in me

>>33350357
>>33350299
I'm sorry, anon. I wasn't in that thread, but I did notice it yesterday. I don't want to put words in your mouth but to me it sounds like you're in pain and distress and want to be noticed. Not in an unreasonable way, but in a way that makes you feel alive and that you're a part of humanity. I think we all want to be acknowledged by at least one human being and to feel like someone cares about us. I want that. It's a terrible situation because it feels like you're all alone when in reality there are so many men (especially young men) like you who feel this way right now, and have been feeling this way for many years and decades. It's just that we're all suffering in isolation and for some of us coming here is our only human check-in.

I don't really have advice for you since I'm in a similar situation, but I have never considered cutting myself. I'm not sure why not, but maybe there is some other outlet you could find that doesn't harm you. And yes, you're lonely, but you're not a failure. You're clearly making an effort, you still feel bad about it, and you still have a desire to change, so you're still going strong. I'm starting to think that that is going to be life for a lot of us. A constant state of struggle where the mark of success isn't to eliminate the struggle but to never fully give up. As long as we keep trying, we'll never fail.

Cutting those onions really fucked up my eyes

>>33350999
You are our main problem now.

>>33350999
>you need to kill for a worthless cause
Yeah that will teach society. How are those suicide statistics looking, Sargent?

>>33351023
Apparently, since you have no issues.

>>33351039
I think the less of you, the more safe our cities are. I don't care if you kill yourself.

I know I can learn something from everyone, it might takes months, years, but every single person can teach you something new, something valuable. Then there are those people that teach you something new, and moving with each conversation you have with them. I've known a few like that. That's mindblowing, better than sex.

The problem is I never talk to people like that anymore. I could be surrounded by 1000s of people fawning over me but I'd still be lonely because none of them could understand or relate to me. It's just the way it is. I'll walk away in sadness.

>>33345493
>she said I love you within 2 days of matching online
that's the easiest way to tell she's not being honest and as easily as she told you that she tells the same to any other man
avoid and look for something better

>>33351092
Brilliant

>>33350456
Brutal bit of reality
I went fron 410 to 190 currently
My self image feels worse than when I started
The mental recovery is a completely different part than the physical one, and it's way less straightforward
It's why yoyo-ing is so common
Don't really know how to fix it, so many things have gotten better and my life has objectively improved yet I have moments of self image infinitely worse than when I was still in morbid obesity apathy not caring about shit in order to not feel
Maybe it won't be as bad for you since you dont have as much to lose and won't be as floppy and deformed in the end
But I do hear from other recovered fats that it's always bad and a battle

One thing I noticed is I started trying to get validation from other people and it really has to all be internally sourced or you'll end up codependent in fucked up situations

>>33350999
What's your problem, pal?

See you all I made a huge mistake today. I went OCD over nothing about a car. You ain't alone. If you have OCD issues.

>>33345462 (OP)
My dad and I both saw the Hachishakusama.I didn't know what that was when I first saw her. I was really young, and I saw tons of other ghosts at the time. She's always depicted with big tits, but I don't remember any of that lol

>>33351323
a huge mistake? do you want to talk about it? if not, then i’ll just say that with ocd you’re bound to have episodes sometimes, and i’d suggest trying to focus on something else until your huge mistake doesn’t seem as huge anymore

From what you've told me to acting shady recently, it's really hard to imagine that things are all right. You aren't communicating anything to me other than I am not important enough for you to disclose what's going on. If you want to keep acting this way then I am cutting the cord soon. There are other people far worth investing my time rather than you. Honestly, I should call you out on your bullshit but that's not something you can handle. You've been lying about stupid things from the start and it's obvious but I just let it slide. You want to keep this up? If I had any self respect then I should just walk away. I have no idea what I was thinking giving you another chance. Nothing but lies fall from your mouth. I really wanted to have more faith in you but looks like that candle is burning out. I don't know why I am hanging onto it but hopefully you figure something out. It might take a miracle for you to change but no matter. We will go our separate ways very soon. The message will be clear.

I wonder if things really always happen for a reason. The person I love the most in this world, and who I had planned my entire life around, just broke my heart. It wasn't infidelity, or anything sudden and devastating, more like the straw that finally broke me and forced me to step away. It was the promises upon promises that just never came true for one reason or another, and I always chose to forgive and be patient and stay strong because I believed that love would get us there....well, I'm afraid I'm all out of belief. I can't make myself stay with someone who never delivers. Someone who can never give me the security and consistency that I need in order to feel secure. The only thing we have is love, but sometimes even that is not enough of a foundation to build a future on. Fifteen years spent....and nothing to show for it. I'm so torn up all I can do is cry. I don't know how, but I will get through this. I have to.

>>33345630
Lmao, guy has balls of steel.

Meanwhile the Janny when I asked him a question:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gsNaR6FRuO0&pp=ygUNZGlhbCB1cCBzb3VuZA%3D%3D

Things are going well. I wonder how they can go wrong?

>>33351407
When a Janny acts all tough and cool and starts acting like dial up when asked about themselves. Obviously someone who is looking for a reaction.

15 years, man, my condolences

>>33351412
I'm sorry you had a bad interaction with the moderators

feeling so oddly indifferent and empty today. i wish i truly didn't care, but it makes me feel down anyway. feeling lonely and pathetic; no friends, losing interest in hobbies, slacking off academically. i crave the comfort of familiarity so badly. having a close friend or a partner that actually cares and wants to be around unlike my own partner, who seems to drift away more each day. i feel like i'll never be able to achieve that sense of
peace and comfort from true friendships and relationships because i'm socially crippled and i hate being around normies but i'm not too interesting myself. ngl this is the least of my problems right now between school, debt, work, health, etc. but idk why it feels so bad right now. some days i spend talking to no one at all, not even messaging. i know i should worry about more important stuff, which is the worst part. i know nothing can fix how i feel so all i want is to get over this but i don't know how and don't even got the will to do anything

You know my real name, just fucking say it you pussy. You did all the work to dox me over discord, and you don't even have the balls to admit it. Does me still being around the game and general really piss all of you off? I’m glad I unfriened most of you for being twofaced grooming faggots, so much for being friends.

I am experiencing ketosis and autophagy

no one likes me and i have no one to hang out with for a week

I'm so tired of having to swim around people's angry and/or irritated moods and it's really starting to affect me.

Despite my shortcomings, I’m alright
I’m alright

Everyone I have ever known has betrayed me, or been fairweather when it actually has mattered. No matter who I meet it's always the same. I have never been anyone's priority unless they want something despite always dropping everything to help. When I am at my most vulnerable no one bats an eye. When I almost die, no one lends a hand or even tries to cheer me up. I have to suffer in silence, and always have. Two weeks of this hell, tomorrow it's three, then it'll be a month, then a year... I'm done.

>>33352576
you're not alone

>>33351925
Same

None of that codependent reframing shit is helping anymore, it just hurts. Ghosted for a day and now here's another day where he probably won't contact again, the changeup from all day everyday to a little bit throughout the day to now popping out for a day or 4 at a time is killing me. There is no stability any longer, at any point he can and will fully disconnect, there is no connection tether anymore. And it's driving me fucking crazy. I know it's not about me, it's about shit he has going on or things just naturally fading, I know I'm just desperate to be chosen because I feel like I'm not good enough, but knowing isn't helping the feeling. I can only sleep for like 5 hours a night because my system is so fucked up over him. Full on crashouts multiple times a week. I keep drinking to cope. Did I only feel okay last night because I got buzzed? I can't fucking keep that up. I felt way better before I ever met him, why can I recognize that and not just choose to move on then, I don't like who I've become in all of this, desperate and anxious and irrational. And that's on me, not him

I wanted to spend more time healing shit in therapy before I started talking to people and I really should have but we just met and clicked really fast and I got pulled into a dynamic I wasn't ready for
Worst part is I can't tell if I'm fully delusional because this thing between us hasn't been defined at all which makes me really afraid to try to clarify it because what if I'm a fucking fool. At this point it probably doesnt matter and is going to end soon anyway
God I'm fucking insane. Why would someone stick around for this. I try to keep the extent of it hidden but there's no way I'm not sending out horrible vibes

This is the golden age that you are living through right now. Humanity has never had it better. Haven't you heard? Jews are losing bigly and we are winning, in fact we have already won and everything is great now. Patriots are in control.

If you aren't living a joyous, prosperous and fulfilling life it's a YOU problem.

>>33352866
Sorry wrong pic

You drink water right as they pass your bedroom and you accidentally inhale it and you cough and now they assume anything and everything.

I still feel the urge throughout the day to tell her something or share a thing but she doesn't care anymore
How long does it take for that to go away

I'm sorry that I don't have the things that a person would need to be able to pull you away from your misery. I realized a long time ago that I didn't. I realized a long time ago that you weren't really mine, before everything. I should have told you to leave when it all happened. I was selfish and so were you, just guided by different reasonings to get to a similar goal. I get it. Your rage. I feel it too, I'm just more defeated by it and try to refuse its company. I'd rather allow despair instead, as I've got a far better handle on it. I want to support you and wait out what you're going through with you, but I think that it's gotten bad enough to where I just perceive resentment whether it's felt by you or not. I think that's probably just intuition telling me to leave you alone. It's sad to think things took the turns that they did. You're still my favorite person and I still love you. I wish that you would tell me the dirty truth about it all, every detail. That way I could at least hate you and feel something other than this gnawing void.

>>33352866
why even waste heavy ammo on an injured soldier like that?

>>33345462 (OP)
Theres this old bitch in Georgia that would send people to the house my parents and I lived in at the time and rape me. She did this repeatedly. My parents would be at work and it would be summer. And some group of adults would break in. They'd mouth rape me. So I'd bite the one guys penis. Their response was to bite mine back. They laughed at it and asked how it felt. I said you all deserved it though and they were pedophiles.

They always shined lights in my eyes.

This near 3 min 4chan wait to post is bullshit.

>>33352960
the longer you two go in no contact it goes away naturally

>>33353044
Only true for some

Just changed my valve cover gasket on my truck while covering at my job. Holy shit that was intense.

I'm a porn addict. I tried to stop countless times, but I always fail. I even tried going to a therapist/psychiatrist and had Revia prescribed (medication for alcoholics and opioid addicts, that supposedly reduces cravings) but couldn't last more than a few days.
I'm sorry for being alive.

>>33352991
The sound like a tragic misunderstanding by both parties

Well, you know what? I DO have anger issues. I do because I'M SICK AND TIRED OF PUTTING UP WITH EVERYONE'S BULLSHIT.

>work myself up
>ask girl out
>she says yes
>anxiety for like a week until the day
>she ghosts me
yeah not doing that again
ill just stay single and die alone

>>33352991
You had the things to help me, you just didn't want to believe that you did. I was fully yours, but you wouldn't let yourself have me. Our goals weren't aligned, I needed you to stay and you were always scrambling for ways to leave. I am not angry or resentful, I am miserable that you left for no reason because you couldn't stop seeing threats or harms everywhere that didn't exist. I never did anything wrong and always tried to support you, then one day you just stopped caring and tried to cut me off. Afterwards I fell into a pit of despair. In this despair I lashed out at the sheer unfairness of it all, because you know I had no one and I have been hurt so many times. I didn't want you to go, because I need you. I don't need you to stay away, I need you to come closer. The dirty truth is that you abandoned me over things I was never told, and that weren't real. You betrayed the promises you made to me. I didn't hate you, I am suffering from the choice you made to leave me here in hell. Not leaving me here is how you help my misery, pulling away is why I am miserable.

I guess this is it. Thats all there is to it.

>another episode of being painfully hot for a fictional character and obsessing nonstop over them

>>33353192
Say you want this

>>33353191
I think you have the wrong anon. He wouldn't ever say those things, and especially not right now while he's mad at me.
I'm a fuck up, anon. Good luck on getting closure with your loved one.

>>33353207
Maybe I am and you don't know it. They constantly assumed bad things about how I felt when they weren't true. They also absolutely use this site.

>>33353106
Most males are, anon. That doesn't make it okay but you don't need to be taking any drugs for it.

I have really severe brainfog. Also a lot of decision paralysis
never really know who I wanted to be. Never knew who my "tribe" were. Can't relate to leftish people or emo subcultures. can't relate to incel chuds that typically roam sites like these. Constantly worried that I might do the wrong thing. Just about getting by. Not doing bad enough to warrant mental health support of any kind but not good enough to thrive.

I just need a purpose, a goal. I just can't convince myself to subscribe to a religion. How the hell do atheists have the drive to do anything if there is nothing in the afterlife?

failed so many life stuff not because of other people or being x/10 or any incel bullshit. I know that I just need to pull the right strings. What strings though?

Am I even using the proper reaction image for this post? Will anyone even care to read this aimless rant?

>>33353238
Practice Socratic dialogues

>>33353240
Would it be a good idea to engage in socratic dialogue with a chatbot? I've heard that some people became really unhealthy parasocail when trying. But I find that people in real life may not have the patience to engage in socratic dialogue

>>33353270
You can do it yourself with a pen and paper. That’s what I did.
As for using AI, depends on your personality

Being such a cerebral, calculating person has gotten me exactly what I wanted in life but also keeps me from experiencing true spontaneity in relationships because I'm never sure if the other person is "best" for me in the long run. I'm 35 and don't have much time left to start a family.

>>33353287
>depends on your personality
In what sense? Do certain models work for certain people?

>>33353297
I meant in terms of forming an unhealthy attachment or bond
Find a space that works for you

I just binged 7 hours of classic Takeshi's Castle out of nowhere and found that more enjoyable than anything the internet's done for me this year. Legitimate laughter came out of me on multiple occasions, the sort that leaves a smile on your face after it's done. I tend to avoid being a pessimistic doomer faggot in the whole old VS new discussion but in this case it's true, they just don't make 'em like they used to.

>>33353313
Trial and error, I guess
I dont wanna do pen in paper yet, and there is a lil autism in me which really doesn't trust doing it with AI
My indecision is a cuase for alot of mess on my desk and in my living area.
People can often be emotionally unavailable, don't really want to find online bros to do it with because anyone can record shit that is sent over text dms

>>33345462 (OP)
Next time I see avoidant signs I'm dipping without a second thought. This shit is not worth it. I am not built for this kind of relationship.

>>33353217
I can't live like this anymore. I would rather die or chemically castrate myself at this point.

>>33353196
I mever did. Maybe once upon a time i deluded myself into thinking i did.

I didnt. Im sorry jesse.

Ive gone so far. What my parents harped about, i did far surpassed in 8 months. Its just... still nothing feels real. The only thing i want isnt even realistic apparently.

Im an idiot. I need to be dead.

>>33353339
> My indecision is a cuase for alot of mess
Yeah in your life. Just fucking do it on paper and pen you lazy cretin, stop trying to think your way to living

>>33353356
Alright I get the memo.. thanks anons

>>33352730
I wish that were true, unfortunately it is not.

>>33353572
I mean being one who suffers in silence. many people live like this. seems almost random who gets to escape it and who dies like this.

>>33353352
I'm sorry, anon. It's good that you're against it, but since you hate it so much you shouldn't let it win. Remember the brain's neuroplasticity? Your brain didn't used the be the way it is now, and it can be changed again in the same way. It's little steps and new habits formed over years that turn into decades. The path you took in is the same path out. You just have to walk each step back to undo it.

It's obviously easier said than done. And you need to not only undo the porn, but also add a good thing in the same way. But of course, good things aren't nearly as alluring or addictive, which is why we fail.

You can read your own words to see that you obviously hate your life with porn. It's up to you to try to live life again without it by making the smallest steps each day. You will have regressions, but what's important is that you always keep pushing for that next step. And we'll all suffer along the way. That's for certain.

And if you ever got to the point where you thought dying or castrating yourself was the next option, why not try something else extreme that you would otherwise never do? If you're going to throw your life away anyway, why not roll the dice and see if it fixes anything or makes you happy before your death? Things like wiping your devices and starting, cutting off your internet, doing social things that you'd otherwise never do, saying what you really think, whatever. And if it doesn't work you'd be past the point of caring anyway and can continue with whatever you were going to do.

>>33353207
>I'm a fuck up, anon
How are you a fuck up? You should talk to them instead of assuming their feelings. You want to hate them to make it easy, but they probably don't hate you and got mad for a reason. If it's been a few days they likely have calmed down by now.

>>33353355
And what is that only thing you want?

>>33353605
Thank you, anon. Your words inspire me. It's really difficult to stop it, and at this point it is being used for mood regulation and nothing more. It's not about fetishes or lust: it's about not feeling bad. It works for a bit, but the recoil is really severe.

You are right about trying something new, it's just that I'm too tired of failing so much, but I guess there's no easy way out of this. It's not worth it, and I need to stop it by blocking the main sources of addiction while trying something new, at least once.

Thanks again.

https://youtu.be/ORCIvLwk0ng?si=XFSJ8vMVRi5N37PL

>>33352996
Because all wars are contrived in order to sacrifice the males and redistribute the females and children to their remaining assets (CHATTEL) to keep them happy and pacified. Most ukrainian women are now filling the european escort sites, mating with immigrants and other new arrivals.

I need to escape from this as soon as possible...

I'll see how she turns out next week
I'm almost always ready for disappointment

>>33353680
Happy to help, friend. It might be the most difficult challenge that almost all modern men have to deal with in some way. So difficult that many will just give in to it completely and tell themselves that it's okay to avoid the mental pain. But they're just accepting slavery at that point. And yes, I know how you feel about it being more of a pick-me-up activity to regulate your mood. But look at how short that good feeling lasts and compare it to the longer-lasting, horrible feeling you had while making your posts.

You can probably remember a better time when this didn't have a hold on you, which makes it hard for you to just accept the way things are now. Never let go of that part of you that resists it and tells you that it's wrong. It hurts, but that's the old you that's been with you since childhood trying to come back to life. If you let that go then you have officially been defeated.

Lastly, remember that most men struggle with this. No generation of men has ever been challenged with this level of temptation before and we don't have it all figured out yet. And it's something men struggle with in silence and isolation, so just remember that you're not alone. I'm with you.

>>33345462 (OP)
Wondering if I'm going to send myself into psychosis, seem to have short lived but severe mental breaks. They're not regular, but regular enough to raise some concerns.

You talk about work way too much

>>33354072
The sad reality is that work makes up the biggest portion of a lot of people's lives. If you don't have anything else going on, then work becomes your whole world in your mind. And even when you do have other things going on, you're still spending more time on work during weekdays/workdays.

>>33353823
Exactly. It feels good for a bit, but way worse after the dopamine is gone. It's simply not worth it, and like you said it, not only people give up, some (like my therapist once) tried to convince me that it was OK to continue like that and I should do it more.
>Never let go of that part of you that resists it and tells you that it's wrong.
Indeed. There was a time when this wasn't a need, it just rarely happened. I know it is possible because I went months without it once, but it was mostly because I was sick.
>I'm with you.
Thank you fren. I feel like an alcoholic living inside a tavern. The vice is just a few button presses away, but I still wanna be free from it.

>>33351005
Thanks anon I'm replying SUPER late but I'm gonna keep trying. I want to find love someday. I hope I can find them despite my scars

>>33354321
My pleasure, anon. I hope you find it too. Remember that everyone loves a good comeback story. To be a part of one is even better.

>>33349141
>Should break up - not because your partner is selfish, and childish, but because you both are. Neither of you should be in a relationship if you don't try to understand your partner's feeling and concerns. I get tired of people pretending that there is only one side to their situation and their partner is the only one to blame. I've lived enough years to know that it's hardly ever true. Psychopathic behavior is blaming other people for everything, while pretending you're innocent. That is weakness.

>The way that you word it "I've put a lot of time and energy into this person" isn't something a well-adjusted person would write. Love is not transactional.
bravo, anon

I cheated on my girlfriend who loved me very much. I loved her too but like a sister not really romantically. I didn’t mean to hurt her she found out by accident but it’s for the best she did. I never would’ve told her. I just wanted to set her free and for her to never know. I’m sorry I wish I was better. I told her it wasn’t her fault and that she didn’t deserve it.

>be me
>show someone they are irrefutably wrong
>also make a silly joke to lighten the mood
>they ignore the irrefutable statement and challenge the joke as if it is my argument
every time

How the fuck did we go from posting about yearning for each other's touch in bed at night to fall asleep easier and sending hand bra and bulge pics and talking about wanting to explore and find all the freckles on her body to it taking several days to get a reply and zero return on flirting attempts
I'm fucking confused man

>>33353051
how long have you been nc?

>>33354561
Were you fucking someone you saw like your sis?

I am still unfulfilled. I am in pain every day, whether emotional, physical, or mentally. I haven’t been blessed or have received something that puts me on track to realizing my dreams, but I have been rejected many times. I have a fucking anxiety fear fucking thing that springs up whenever something happens where I NEED to take a small risk such as talking to strangers or going outside of my norm. I still am couch surfing and was THIS close to reporting a person because they constantly push boundaries every fucking day, and if not them then my parent. I am so fucking upset every fucking day I cry and do all that I can to not fucking break. My mind almost broke today from the rage and frustration of not having shit and seeing others happy; this is not me. I hate my fucking body and I’m going to starve it until something good happens. I fucking hate living in this stupid cycle of mediocrity and fucking stress. I fucking hate everything, I feel like giving up and just smoking and drinking, leaving my town and just survive like a fucking animal. I hate it. I hate that I pray every day like a fucking jew boy and nothing. I hate that I have all this pressure and the moment I want to take a break I have to fight my own self and even those around me because I’m apparently not allowed to relax. Fucking hell dude suicidal thoughts are a bitch to wrestle and fuck my body being annoyed and triggered by menial fucking shit. I am going to starve this fucking body until it learns. Fucking 0 happy years these past 30+ years. 0 years where I can say these were good years.

Theres something so bad I wont even mention it here for some irrational fear of someone tracking my internet activity.
But I can't even tell my therapist about it. It would alter my friendships and my life.
I need help for it an don't know who to go to. My therapist already knows too much about me ,I can't dump this on her too.
It's not something I did, it's just something about me, my thoughts.

>>33355520
>some irrational fear of someone tracking my internet activity
>It's not something I did
might as well just get it off your chest, it's not like you're gonna get arrested for thought crimes

>>33354970
9 months. If she came back I’d love her to bits again.

Why can't you just try
Really try
Put your soul into it
Your back into it
Find purpose and meaning in it
Feel empowered by it

>>33355857
Fail and die?

>>33355968
The one you can't fail at
The one where failure is giving up

>>33355993
What if I am the illusion?

>>33356001
Then become truth instead

>>33356034
Take you with me?

>>33356046
I can only go where there is truth
Not incomplete truth
Total truth

>>33356098
This is your station, baby
I won’t let you down