as much as im getting fitter, stronger, and more capable, im still scared of violence. i flinch at small things and would probably lock up and freeze if someone actually hit me. i react to pain easily. i dont even know if i can actually take a punch.

how do i become someone who is mentally prepared and ready, or even enjoys, violence and fighting? I'm short but relatively muscular, and i want to become aggressive and ready to throw down. im sick of disrespect and jealous of how men who are capable of violence are treated with respect and attraction.

can you even change shit like this in your mid 20s? or am i going a be a pussy forever no matter how physically strong or athletic i am.

>>33369616 (OP)
Just do martial arts. And don't start fights, you can easily get fucked up.

>>33369616 (OP)
By your mid twenties you should already know that any kind of violence has the potential of you getting jumped, stabbed, or shot along with medical fees + court fees + jail time. Grow the fuck up nigga.

>>33369640
He didn't said he wanted to engage on violence, only that he could use it if the situation calls for it

>>33369652
Ok but still even if prepared for violence he should be instead thinking how to avoid it in the first place. Life isn't a movie where every fight you feel justified in ends up in a win.

>>33369673
>he should be instead thinking how to avoid it in the first place.
True, it's wise to know not every conflict is worth engaging nor that you will be able to come victorious of every single one

>>33369689
I do martial arts and 99% of the people who come in think they're good and then you spar and beat their ass and they can't believe what happened.

>>33369640
>>33369673
i do avoid it in the first place. thats not my concern. the problem is that when push comes to shove and an unavoidable conflict comes my way, or god forbid societal collapse, any prepared-for-violence person can kill me, rape my asshole, and rape my wife and kids.
i am a conflict avoidant person, but i dont want to be avoidant out of fear. im not going to walk around looking to hurt someone, i just dont want to have to back down from every situation because im a bitch who doesn't want to get hurt.
like the type of person who has his friends "hold him back" knowing damn well he'd get fucked up if he actually fought.

>>33369621
That's fair, but is hard sparring that replicates real fighting common in most gyms now?
I know light sparring is necessary and most conducive to actual learning, but i need to learn what its like to have an actual gorilla nigger throwing bombs at me.

>>33369726
>I know light sparring is necessary and most conducive to actual learning, but i need to learn what its like to have an actual gorilla nigger throwing bombs at me.
It's not good for your brain, that's why most people don't do it. But if you want it then you can find it.

Find a MMA gym in your area with a reputation for "going too hard." Ideally, you want one that has at least one hard sparring day per week and make sure to go to those. If it's real-world violence you're worried about, MMA hard sparring is as close as you can get without having to dedicate yourself to fighting as a lifestyle. The headspace and physical feeling of hard sparring is completely different from the tippity-tap 50% strength stuff that sport-focused gyms do, and will get you used to the feeling that you may genuinely get fucked up if you don't attack and defend properly. That said, if you're brand new you WILL be getting fucked up. Probably not hospitalized, as even the meathead gyms and teams won't actively try to injure you, but you will receive bruises, very likely some mild concussions, and you will be sore in a way much worse than lifting or rooning.
>become someone [who enjoys fighting]
Revel in the soreness and exhaustion you feel after sparring day. Once you get your first "win" in sparring, you'll start to love it. My first "win" was pairing up with one of our competitors and locking him into a clinch the whole round, after which he told me my clinch work was "fucking nasty."
>sick of disrespect
Disrespect over what? If its about your height, that's just not gonna change. It might be less direct with time, but it won't stop. My apologies.
If it's because you're not already violent, you probably don't want to socialize with people who respect that shit. It's usually felons, addicts, and retards who respect guys just for fighting all the time, and you will probably just get disrespected by those guys because the martial arts crowd doesn't usually fight guys like that.
>can you even change
Yeah, but start now. Go do your research and find that meathead gym

picrel

punch yourself in the face a lot and also relax bc it's not like being seen as violent is a good thing. I could be wrong but maybe I do get a little more initial respect but what if I want to work in an office?

>>33369720
Here's the secret anon, no one likes violence. Violence is inherently chaotic that it's only used as a last measure when your life is at stake. Even guys in the military know this and they have a rule where if you are forced to fight hand to hand, you already fucked up.

The reality is that there are no true Rambos in this world (aside from a very few select people) and the guys who constantly pick fights in public live very short lives. Even if you do manage to win the fight, you run risk of the other person seeking revenge on you (even if you were justfied) and its a never ending cycle. You will never be at peace thinking about getting ambushed by your "opps". You might call yourself a "bitch" but really it's only you calling yourself that. Defending thy masculine honor is a fool's game that has existed for eons (duels) and many men have died defending something abstract that doesn't exist, only because they convinced themselves it's real anyways.

Nobody really cares if you're the dude that his friends need to hold back because there's always a bigger fish like someone who knows mercenaries or somone who really has nothing to lose and is willing to lose their lives over petty shit like name calling. Losing your life over trivial shit like that is pathetic.

I think what you really need is to start forgiving yourself and stop viewing scenarios as a "all or nothing". Even if you have muscle, fighting skills, and a gun, the logistics of it will never make sense. It's literally just best to let it go.

>>33369733
>If its about your height
not necessarily. that certainly has something to do with the overall image of being weak though. i think that perception makes the height a lot worse. i've seen plenty of short dudes who are clearly strong and dangerous and people treat them with respect, aside from jokes and shit which i dont mind.
>you probably don't want to socialize with people who respect that shit
i disagree, think everyone respects it to a degree. when i say "violent and aggressive" i dont mean being an 80iq caveman retard who spergs out about everything. its pretty obvious that people who are physically capable and stand their ground get a lot more respect.
now sure, you dont need to be a good fighter to do that, but i feel that all interactions and disagreements between men have an underlying threat of violence. why would anyone respect me if they could just kill me if they wanted?
i see the ways people, my friends even, treat me vs other people. it know this wouldnt be the case if they physically respected me provided i wasn't tyrannical and aggressive towards them.
women also clearly find it attractive, again, if you aren't a aquaholic problem person.
>>33369745
i dont work in an office and couldnt be forced to do so even with a gun. either way though, like i said, im not talking about being disruptively aggressive and domineering. just someone who is clearly worthy of respect and could back it up with violence theoretically.

>>33369735
i absolutely could roll with prison including solitary confinement

>>33369780
I'm aware of all of that. I'm not trying to pick fights or become a disruptive problem to others. I don't care if I get called names in the sense that I'm not going to hurt someone over it, i just want to be someone that doesn't get called names in the first place because people respect them and their capacity to defend themselves.

Also, this may seem juvenile, but there are some situations where I think fighting is necessary. I almost never care about "muh honor" but lets say someone touched my wife in public? or my children? I can't justify lethal force, but whether you want to admit it or not, "letting it go" and calling the police DOES make you look weak. I wouldn't care if my wife and children's respect for me wasn't on the line. They need to know i can physically protect them. For the wife, her attraction to me might be contingent on that. It could make or break our relationship.

This situation is make believe and highly unlikely, as is any justifiable situation to fight. I just can't go through life knowing I'm dependent on others (the state) to defend myself non-lethally. Knowing that I can't do anything but run away until lethal force is justified.

>>33369735
Also, eventually things will get to a point where you won't be able to get away from the (insert minority) unless you live in bumfuck Appalachia or something. The chaos is coming.

>>33369810
You could ONLY handle solitary. Assuming you're not trolling or posturing, read Violence of Mind. You have not been exposed to incarcerated felons if you think a 4chan user can handle genpop.

>>33369812
>i just want to be someone that doesn't get called names in the first place because people respect them and their capacity to defend themselves

Anon even the strongest motherfuckers get heckled and challenged. You can't avoid this because there's always going to be people that will fuck with you to get a reaction.

>but lets say someone touched my wife in public? or my children? I can't justify lethal force, but whether you want to admit it or not, "letting it go" and calling the police DOES make you look weak.

Anon once again Reddit is not real life. If your wife thinks you are weak for avoiding a life threatening scenario then she is a shit wife or your marriage was on the brink of collapse prior to the incident. The realistic outcome of these scenarios is always: permanant injuries, jail time, or end up possibly dead. It's hilarious how guys will make up these scenarios that only happen only because the would be victims had bad situational awareness in the first place. If you're willing to have your life on the line because you want to look "cool" in front of your wife and kids then go ahead and arm yourself with a knife or a gun, but you're not getting a victory chant, you're only digging yourself in a hole that could've easily been avoided in the first place.

>I just can't go through life knowing I'm dependent on others (the state)

If it bothers you so much, listen to the other anons who suggested MMA but you'll quickly realize it's not enough and you'll be always be vulnerable to some sort of attack or ambush.

You really need to let go of these masculinity games. Only middle schoolers and deadbeats think it's cool to turn everything into a fight.

>>33370049
>Anon even the strongest motherfuckers get heckled and challenged
I guess I'm not being very specific in what I mean. I don't care about being heckled and challenged, I care about being entirely dismissed as "not a threat". It's one thing for people to challenge you, its another to be seen as impotent and "not even in the running".
Its like the difference between being in the friendzone vs fuckzone, its whether or not you're seen as a sexual "threat".
I wish people would genuinely challenge me, but they don't. I just get a sort of indirect disrespect and indifference that's baked into people's subconscious from the moment they see me. It's not even a deliberate action on their part.
>If your wife thinks you are weak for avoiding a life threatening scenario then she is a shit wife or your marriage was on the brink of collapse prior to the incident.
There's really no way to know this until the situation happens, and I that point I'd rather not toss a marriage because I wasn't aware she wanted a protector. I also disagree that there are ANY women that don't want to be physically protected by their man. I think being physically assaulted by another man, and then watching your husband avert his eyes and back down "lets go call the cops honey" would dry up any pussy on the face of this earth.
And you continually say "bad situational awareness" as if problems can't happen even when you do everything to avoid them. Also the US is becoming more like Brazil every day. It's going to unavoidable at some point.
Also I don't want to look "cool" I want to look like a capable man. Don't infantilize it.
>Only middle schoolers and deadbeats think it's cool to turn everything into a fight.
I completely agree, that why I'm not asking how to become a fight seeking retard.

>>33370049
>You really need to let go of these masculinity games.
I actually would really like to. I tried very hard for a long time. What it has done to me and my other "non masculine" male friends is make them highly passive and easily controllable pushovers that others don't respect and women aren't attracted to. You are rewarded for being masculine and capable of violence. Not necessarily violent, but capable of it. Forgoing your masculinity might work for people who are inherently masculine in their physicality and character, but non masculine men are penalized in just about every area of society, if they are straight anyways.

Regardless, don't take all this as being argumentative. I'm just trying to explain where I am coming from.

>>33369616 (OP)
chad mendez is JOOOCED out of the UFC

>>33369616 (OP)
Listen to stories of old school pro wrestlers when they're out in public for guidance, like Haku biting someone's nose off. Emulate low inhibition people in general: football fans, biker gangs. Somali pirates. You may have to take steroids, drink a lot, smoke meth, chew khat.

>>33374370
Look up Mad Dog Fist as well.

>>33369616 (OP)
>>33369726
just pay 1 on one with a trainer and get your questions answered
> i react to pain easily.
maybe try challenging yourself with something tough like jocko runnGet Captcha
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ing 10 miles barefoot on sand

>>33369616 (OP)
its called alcohol

>>33369694
>Be one of those guys who've been preparing for "the moment" their entire life
>So caugnt up in the aggro heat that they can't think well
>Get Kwab'ed

>>33369616 (OP)
pick up boxing (or any combat sport)
hang out around drunk people
you'll get some practice in no time

>>33369616 (OP)
Load up on steroids

>>33369616 (OP)
>im still scared of violence. i flinch at small things and would probably lock up and freeze if someone actually hit me
Hunt animals, it helps.

>>33369640
>any kind of violence has the potential of you getting jumped, stabbed, or shot along with medical fees + court fees + jail time.
Maybe he lives in a country where it's normal. Still won't escape medical fees though.