I have a Sperger's syndrome and normie behaviors always seemed extremly hostile and alien to me. I always felt like I was succesfully avoiding being interrogated and manipulated by others by being repulsive and passive-aggressive. This gave me a great sense of pride but also of hopelessness as I believed people decided their attitude towards me within seconds based on my immutable traits.

I don't think I was ever significantly bullied. Nevertheless I managed to convince myself I was, because my spergy internet acquaintances reported not being able to recognize bullying while it happened. This led to extreme suicidal and homicidal ideations during my time in high school that absorbed most of my day.

But nowadays I see that more of us spergs that we'd like admit have an inflated sense of self-importance and recognize intricate plots against them where there are just immediate reactions to our odd or hostile behavior. I am increasingly convinced that normal people just want their feelings reciprocated and even seemed to care about mine even if they couldn't understand them due to my chronically flat affect and mood swings. At the same time, I suspect it could all be a cope that my brain made up to deal with insufferable despair brought by the convinction that I am doomed to be lonely for the rest of my life, which is immeasurably worse than any sense of regret for my past behavior.

So, tell me, is it true that social skills mostly amount to the ability to make other people feel heard and understood? Was the alienation that I experienced throughout my life just in my head? Is there hope for me and others like me?

>>33380243 (OP)
>So, tell me, is it true that social skills mostly amount to the ability to make other people feel heard and understood?
I don't know about "mostly", but it's a big chunk of it, certainly.
>Was the alienation that I experienced throughout my life just in my head?
Very possibly.
>Is there hope for me and others like me?
Absolutely.

>>33380243 (OP)
I won't read all that. Get to the point next time and ask for advice about a specific problem.

>>33380243 (OP)
>I have a Sperger's syndrome
hasn't been a diagnosis in over 12 years.

>>33380243 (OP)
I think the real trouble stems from bullying and weird targeting behavior when we're young and in our formative years. I felt similar to you as a kid and we really did have bullies constantly setting traps and giving you snide, mocking attention that you had to watch out for. But that stops happening as an adult and you need to drop that feeling of being unfairly targeted. You will probably turn out happier. People are too burnt out and focused on their own lives to harass you and upset yours.

>>33381529
The DSM-IV is still used throughout Europe so fuck off with your pedantism.
>>33381809
I was never bullied or even rejected in childhood. My circle was full of social outcasts. I luckily avoided your fate. I know many people who were subject to it and it's not fun.

I was rejected during my teenage years from 14 years of age onwards. It took me very long to realise that as my drive to socialize is very limited. I had no idea about the frequency with which most young people party/go out and meet in casual settings. It felt quite natural to me that I am never invited. I never even had the desire to until I realised that not being considered is essentially a social attack. I only remember very minor cases of bullying and my memory tends to be accurate for these kinds of things.

It is likely that my self-centered behavior was a good self-defence against bullying. But I doubt it was a trauma response. I must have cognitively figured out that people are hostile to me. But I also think I might have went too far. My perception nowadays is that people are just driven by simple motivations and easily malleable, not evil.

>>33380243 (OP)
Nice