I'm a fat middleaged autistic woman. I don't have any friends and I'm estranged from family. My only social outlet is fucking men off of dating apps. Over the course of having sex with lots of men over the years, I ended up lusting for black men. Don't get me wrong, a lot of the sex I have had with black men has been boring or bad. It really matters whether the other person cares about your pleasure. It also matters whether you like the other person and care how they feel. There's no race or type of person that's gonna have a 100% success rate because people are people and they're not all the same. But when the sex is really really good, it's usually a black man. I like the way they look and how they smell (you can only really smell the difference when you're right in their balls or their armpits).

I know it's fucked up and racist to fetishize people based on race, but I keep opening up porn sites and typing in BBC anyway. How do I snap out of it? I don't want black men to feel gross or put down because of the way I look at them. I don't want them to feel fetishized. I've seen nonwhite people complain about this shit before. How do I stop feeling grossed out by white men and their weird pink dicks and feel more neutral about everything

>>33384961 (OP)
kill yourself

>>33385008
Why should I do that?

>>33384961 (OP)
Post tits or GTFO.

>>33384961 (OP)
No cap, your life sounds pointless and retarded already so why does it matter if you lust after black dick?

all i see is porn doing permanent brain damage to you

>>33385064
There's no such thing as a worthless person, and there's no person whose conduct doesn't matter

>>33384961 (OP)
Yes

>>33384961 (OP)
Ye

>>33384961 (OP)
>I'm a fat middleaged autistic woman.
No, you're a man.