Thread 936175289

Seriously how the fuck do I become a "Man". I'm so sick of feeling like I'm perpetually stuck at 16 years old. And yeah, I didn't have a father growing up. It fucking sucks I hate it. It was over from the start.

>>936175289 (OP)
Begone, you Lying Faggot!

>>936175289 (OP)
It's okay brother! It's not as hard as you think. You just need a push in the right directoin.

How old are you now? You can get started by doing this:

> Start taking care of yourself?

Do you lift? Get on a good program if not. It's not expensive or hard to do. Do you drink? Take a few months off. Do you smoke? Quit that shite!

2. Do you have a job? If not, it's time to get one. If so, does it pay well? If not, it's time to level up! Get a career. Make plans.

3. Do you have any responsibilities you're neglecting? Get to them!


We're here for you /b/rother! We're all gonna make it

Suck down loads until you level up. Why don’t you know this?

Don’t overthink it.

Start taking care of your health and appearance—work out, use products that make you feel good, and invest in yourself. Get a job and your own place, but more importantly, fill your life with activities that feed your soul. Be involved in your community—do good.

Everything else will follow.

>>936175432
>>936175640
my problems aren't physical ones. they are mental ones. I already have a well paying job. I FEEL like a baby. Like I look at all of the other men around me and I just feel like a fucking worm compared to them. its like they just have something that I don't.

>>936175704

The cartesian dualism of mind and body has been rejected since the 1960s brother! By lifting heavy weights and cleaning up your diet, you're going to notice tremendous mental gains as well! I'm not saying you're out of shape, but unless you're actively weightlifting on a good program and intentionally eating a good diet, you're probably experiencing a lot more problems than you realize. I'm saying if you get on a good program and eat clean for 3 months, you're going to realize you were operating on autopilot for the last several years.

For example, there's very good empirical evidence that improving diet and exercise has a 80% greater effectiveness than psychiatric medication except in cases of the most serious disorders (schizophrenia, etc).

>I FEEL like a baby. Like I look at all of the other men around me and I just feel like a fucking worm compared to them.

Fitness helps, but let's unpack that. What do you think makes you feel that way?

how old are you?

one thing that helps people along is "responsibilities"

you are forced to grow up when you are stuck having to pay shit ha

>>936175959
They just seem to have confidence or something. A solid identity, whereas I don't.
>>936175961
26

>>936175704
As someone with the ’tism, I get it.

Honestly? You’re getting some solid advice in this thread, but I’d also recommend checking if your job offers counseling—it can really help to get an outside perspective.

A lot of the time, that sense of lacking comes from within. It’s worth exploring where those beliefs come from and learning to challenge them.

Trust me, I grew up feeling like I was always on a different wavelength than everyone else, like my brain was somehow inferior. Having someone to talk to made a huge difference.

>>936176227
what's weird is that I felt more mature in high school than I do now. like I felt that I was on my way towards being a mature adult. its like something happened to my fucking brain.

>>936176332
I think its the internet tbh. I didnt have the internet until I was 17 in 2016. my mom wouldn't let me have a computer. I think it fucked up my brain.

>>936176217
Okay 26. Not a bad year to start turning your life around.

What is your job?
do you still live with your parents?
what is your health?

>>936176632
not telling you my job gangstalker but I don't work at retail or a warehouse or trades
I haven't lived with my mom for 6 years
my health is peak

>>936176217
Brother! It's totally normal to not have it all figured out by the time you're 26. Here's something that helped me when I was your age and was in the same situation.

1. Go somewhere quiet (no music)
2. Open a text document
3. Write down (realistically) what you think your perfect day would be

For example, "I had a half day where I was teaching programming to my class. I rode my bike back to my house and prepared for a date with my girlfriend. She was also a teacher but we both appreciated space, so I only saw here once a week. We were going to get together and make a healthy meal since we both were super into fitness. Then we were going to spend hte evening drawing and having sex until we fall asleep together"


Something like that. The point of the exercise is it helps you isolate whatever your values are.

4. Then what you can do is work backwards. Think about what steps you'd need to take to make your perfect day a reality.

Even if you don't have that perfect day, you can start to chronicle the progress towards something. From what I'm hearing from you, you don't really have things to work toward and don't have your values totally hammered out yet. That's fine! But you'll probably start to experience that confidence.

>>936176632
Agreed! This was the age when I really pulled everything together and started seriously lifting.

>>936176668
>my health is peak

It's okay brother! It's not that we don't believe you, it's just a lot of men grossly overestimate their physical abilities until they get on a real workout program.

>>936176706
I don't think you understand that my problem isn't a physical one. It's a complete loss of identity. Like I was someone before but they disappeared. I'm empty.

>>936176668
Okay, so I see your problem.

You are retarded.

You can tell people what your job is without being specific.

Let me give you an example.
I work in customer service. You have no idea where, or what company.

So your defensive.

Okay, now tell us your insecurities. You wanted to come on here and cry about being a little bitch. We trying to help you. No ones gonna baby you now if your gonna be rude.

>>936176806
I work in education.

>>936176753
You are emotional, and can't control your emotions.

Why? A girl reject you?

>>936176826
could have fooled me fuckkkkk

>>936176829
No.

I think I just need to stop using the internet honestly. that would help a lot. and do things I used to enjoy. I just don't know how.
>>936176806
I don't want you to baby me I want you to tell me to stop being a nigger.

>>936176753
You're not listening to what I'm saying to you.

I am not saying you have to lift because you are weak.

I am saying that by lifting weights, getting on a serious exercise program, and cleaning your diet -- you will enjoy tertiary benefits that will greatly improve your mood and self confidence.

But even if you don't take the fitness route, that's okay brother! I suggested some other things that worked for me. Maybe if I share a little bit of my story it'll help:

>be me
>24
>living with mom in trailer
>didn't live up to any of my expectatoins
>depressed
>self destructive behavior
>overweight (but still pretty great cardio/strength due to the army)
> Start journaling about what I want in life and trying to identify my values
>realize it's my fault that I'm out of shape
>realize it's not capitalism, the education system, or greater sociological forces that I didn't achieve
>Start working out seriously
>Get a job at a hotel
>Lift seriously
> Get on Scooby's workout program
> diet correctly
>Cut from 225 to 168
> Save up money working shite job
>use that money to go to school for SWE

by 27, I was living with a 8.5/10 QT pie who loved me more htan anything, I was in awesome shape at a strong 189 lbs, and was making $100k a year in my own place.

>>936176829
>>936176806

I can see you're frustrated but let's give our /b/rother a break! he's probably not feeling great right now.

>>936176753
Do you have any thoughts about the writing exercise I mentioned? If you work in education than there's no doubt you see the benefits to getting your ideas on paper!

>>936176912
A nigger acts manlier than you.

Well start listing things that are currently making you sad. That's how any therapist would start this

>>936176999
lol savage trips checked!

So that's it OP? Just abandon the thread?

>>936176806
>>936176829
Sounds like this dude was right