Thread 938476776

chicker and fries edition

So picture this, cocksucka — it’s 2AM, me and Troy’s sister stumble back to her place, gigglin’ like a couple’a high school dropouts, drunk off our fuckin’ asses. We bust through the door and there’s a smell like feet, shame, and expired deli meat.

We turn the corner into the kitchen, and there he is — Troy — standin’ there in the glow of the fridge light… naked. Gut hangin’ over his little Vienna sausage, and he’s rubbin’ himself down with a fuckin’ stick of butter like he’s bastin’ a turkey. And he’s baby talkin’ at us, sayin’ shit like, ‘Huffa huffa, I’m genius, I could write da books, I could dominate, I’m da smartest big baba boocha alive!’ — while lookin’ like the after photo in a cholesterol awareness pamphlet.

Then this motherfucker farts — pfft! — and a pickle falls out. A fuckin’ pickle, bro. I look at him and go, ‘Listen to me, ya lard-ass mayonnaise Gollum — you ain’t dominatin’ shit except the bathroom in ten minutes, you ain’t writin’ books unless it’s “How to Lose Friends and Smell Like Death,” and the only genius thing about you is how you’ve managed to survive this long without Darwin takin’ your fuckin’ ticket.’

That’s when he reaches into the fridge and pulls out… a fuckin’ handgun. He points it at us — click — but the gun is clogged with butter. Misfires. BOOM — blows three of his fat little fingers clean off. His sister starts laughin’ her fuckin’ ass off while he’s squealin’ like a slaughterhouse pig, fartin’ and bleedin’ all over the linoleum.

And while this greaseball’s screamin’, she drops to her knees right there and starts workin’ my Cuban egg roll like she’s tryin’ to win a ribbon at the county fair. I’m starin’ down at this insane scene — butter smoke in the air, Troy on the floor pissin’ himself, fridge door swingin’ open — and I just thought, this is a weird fuckin’ night, Joey.

what did she mean by this?

I had a dream that emma watson came to my house. then the very next day, I was in a completely different location, then I had a dream about emma watson again. this time we were having full on sex, missionary position. very weird dream.

at one point, she said "hurry up and cum", I was like "what is this? ... what are we doing here...? you want to stop like now? like right now? like, right fucking now?"

your thread sucks can you go away soon? lol i guessyour gonna stay until the thread runs out of404

>>938477029
damn, more !

>>938477098
Say pls

>>938477202
please

>>938477202
Here

>>938477215
>>938477202
SCHIZO'CLOCK

>>938477215
Good boy

>>938477257
Oh gross, it's you

I-I-I-I-I can't i-i-imagine... I-I k-know I-I shouldn't h-have her...

M-My m-m-m-mistress V-Victoria J-Justice i-i-is a-a-a-a very b-b-beautiful w-w-woman...

shit thread

>>938477295
:(
sry

Troy eates poop

"She has been vocal about wanting to be recognized as a serious athlete"

if you gotta beg to be recognized, stop

The queen

>>938477458
There he is, The Fister

>>938477437
>>938477257
she is so fucking hot

>>938477637
The motherfister

>>938477629
Queen of J-Tard's mother's sludge pot

>>938477807
Jtard the type of retard to go into ylyl threads posting unfunny tiktok vids thinking he's being a master troll

Troy's sisters oily clunge

Dog poop goes in Troy's stomach

Multiple Device Miggs

post feet

>>938478012
what's up with his little tiny midge sausage fingers?

WTF was Troy thinking?

>>938478119
Fartie Lange

>>938478140
not exactly what i had in mind

>>938478119
Chris Fartley

>>938478171
what did you have in mind? the same fucking pics of emilias feet you've been posting every day every thread for the past 2 years? you already got that covered

>>938478224
Legend says if you post her 3 times, Beady will fist your mother

>>938478242
I haven't posted these pics in awhile but alright brov

>>938478119
Honestly, him getting this fat doesn't phase anyone at all. No one cares about him. To make anyone even notice he'd have to post photos of himself wearing his sister's face or something.

>>938478317
you made that didn't you

>>938478317
Genius character you've got here

>>938478344
i did not but i fapped to it

>>938478265
what? since the last thread? thats not a while

>>938478399
I posted one image in the last thread lmao

>>938478393
if I saw that that, its getting punted across the horizon, what an ugly little fuck, put it out its fucking misery

>>938478422
go to bed choli

>>938478458
WHY I'M DONE WITH FARMING FOR TWO WEEKS

>>938478489
after one day?

>>938478489
I doubt you can wipe your own ass

>>938478489
Aren't you just a shitty persona some cretin thought up?

>>938478526
YEAH SURE

lotta silly anons around this morning

>>938478569
faggot ass brocky shut the fuck up

>>938478581
anon if you want me to suck your dick all you need to do is ask

I need to make love to lily. so badly.

I'm going to fill a folder with thousands of images of Cate Blanchett, post them all day, call myself Tinky, and claim to own and run a bookstore.

okok gngn everyone
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OzdJFXyO8ts
rose poster listen to this
<33

>>938478597
please? It ain't the biggest but you can work with it

>>938478606
this joke while appreciated for trying fell flat like 3 days ago, it isnt any better now

Slimy little pedophile shut-in slithering around the threads pretending it isn't here

I'm going to fill a folder with thousands of images of Cate Blanchett, post them all day, call myself Tinky, and claim to own and run a bookstore

>>938478616
gngn mr. choli

Herman Miller and Herman Munster

I feel like lily can give me the love that I need. I want to make love to her, have sex with her, passionately tongue kiss her.

serious diarrhea, I mean water, thanks troy

>>938478703
Guess that's what J-Tard's nephew gets for struggling

Bro, one time I’m on Craigslist—yeah, back when Craigslist was still the Wild West—and I see this ad from some horny old broad who says she wants a night of passion. I’m thinking, ‘Alright, Uncle Joey will bring the magic wand, a little blow, and we’ll make a night out of it.’

So I get there—bro—it’s J-Tard’s mother. I almost turned around, but I’m already in too deep, I got two grams in my pocket and a half bottle of Tito’s. I figure, fuck it, Joey’s not a quitter.

She’s on the bed, legs open… bro… it’s the biggest monkey I’ve ever seen in my life. It looked like somebody dropped a fire hydrant in a barbershop. The smell? It was death, pure death. My Cuban egg roll took one whiff and said, ‘Not today, cocksucker.’ So I go, you know what, we’re going in fist first like I’m punching out a prizefighter. I’m telling you, I barely touched the sides, it was like throwing a hotdog down the Lincoln Tunnel.

And then—then—this fucking maniac J-Tard comes rolling in on his Herman Miller chair like a NASCAR pit stop, asking where his shota dolls are. Next thing I know, he’s having some autism fit, spinning around like a fucking dreidel on crack. The phimosis goop starts flying like we’re at a Gallagher show. His butt plug shoots out like a mortar, smashes the window. Now there’s glass everywhere, the smell of death, and I’m fist deep in the mother of the year.

I just walked out, bro. Didn’t even zip up. Left the blow on the dresser. I knew that house was cursed.

>>938478815
based coco

I feel like lily has the power to give me the love that I want. I want to make love to her so badly.

Someone said coco and it reminded me of coco Quinn and now I have to jerk off her her

Couple months back, I’m stuck in traffic on the 101, right? I’m high, I’m blasting some old-school Sabbath, just minding my own business. Next thing I hear—woo woo woo—sirens everywhere, like a fucking Michael Bay movie.

I look up, and I see this mess on the highway—it’s J-Tard. This pedophile cocksucker’s in his Herman Miller chair, on the freeway, wheels smoking, leaking all over the asphalt like a wounded sea creature. And he’s not alone, bro—he’s got a kid on his lap. I’m talking about his own nephew. The poor bastard’s just clinging to life, eyes wide like a deer in headlights, trying not to breathe in that phimosis fog.

J-Tard’s screaming about how the kid’s gonna be his ‘shota tag team partner’ and how they’re gonna ‘dominate the wrestling circuit.’ Meanwhile, there’s cops swarming from every angle, one of them almost pukes from the smell when they get close.

Then—no bullshit—his butt plug shoots out mid-chase, ricochets off a Prius, and sends three cars spinning out. The whole highway smells like a moldy lobster tail.

Bro, I just rolled my window up, lit a joint, and prayed the cops put two in his head before he made it past the exit ramp.

>>938478618
IS THAT HERSH/HERMAN

>>938478997
Jtard flyin down the freeway on his office chair with his screaming nephew in his lap while 'breakin' the law' plays

>>938479060
Herman Miller?

>>938479104
kek

Threesome with Taytay and Karlie

Threesome with J-Tard's mother and Beady

>>938478616
he is using you

I wanna use choli too if you know what I mean

>>938479371
ready to finger her bf

>>938479658
I do too but I don’t know what >>938479629
this anon even means

>>938476776 (OP)
Emilia op image ^_^

>>938479957
Hi j-tard

sex with choli

anons, I need to watch Travis breed Taylor

i need to suck off Travis so he's too tired to breed Taylor and she goes and fucks a black guy instead

>>938480839
No, Anon, no.

>>938479220
sounds good.

we got any kylie this morn?

>>938480899
Mmmmm who

>>938481048
filipinos are NOT Asian.
They're a brown pig/monkey hybrid subrace of genetic trash

pinay girls are the most beautiful girls on earth

also cummed twice already this morning cheers, TGIF

>>938481227
based, happy for you. Prob gonna cum to Kat’s tummy later

>>938481273
thats not approved

>>938479957
you are such an annoying goddamn cunt, PLEASE die

>>938481366
I want to lick her eyebrows

I feel like lily can give me the love that I want and need.

>>938481546
not a celeb dumbass

i'm gonna freak out

>>938481640
not a celeb dumbass

>>938481640
Chill dood chill.

>>938481711
AAAAAAAHHHHHHH

>>938481829
>*Hold you back.*
IT AIN'T WORTH IT DAWG, IT AIN'T WORTH IT

what got you actin all crazy this morn??!

>>938481868
just those 2 new mishka pics but thats over now, good bye

>>938481905
yoinked em both tbh #blessed
come back soon

>>938481308
Unapproved but very required

Does BD know what an annoying nutcase he is?

Will I ever be content?
Will I ever feel like something is so great that I
would like to make it permanent?

>>938482251
UGLY

I'm tired of these bitches chooses poodles over my ass.

>>938482305
KNOTTED

>>938482305
I want to torture that poodle with a blow torch, real slow... like a chinaman! (bad joke)

>>938482305
>but if you truly loved her, ... then you would accept the poodle as part of her life...!

>>938481905
Niiiice

>>938481976
Pure sex

>>938482274
No, I don't think so

>>938482379
FUCK THAT! why does that ugly ass poodle get to tongue kiss her, and I don't? I derserve it more! I deserve lily's love much more than that ugly ass dog!

>>938482448
>ana
that's more like it, that's my size style

choli getting beat up by Mexicans on the farm for playing Kpop

>>938482305
if you weren't a stupid piece of shit you wouldn't have to worry about that, but here you are, day after day, crying that she has a dog and doesnt know your fat greasy ass exists and never will

>>938482546
SHE'S HERE

>>938482474
her eyes are insane

>>938482546
I still love Vj but I have not jerked off to her in years

>>938482549
no. she loves me but she doesn't love you. you're just jealous.

>>938482251
Hi j-tard

>>938482567
So fucking sexy

please stop giving your love to that dog. give your love to me. I need it. please.

>>938482567
she’s always here

>>938482585
I will always love her, and same I jerked to her leaks a lot when the dropped but I’ve slowed down a lot since. Now if I’m jerking to her, it’s to tummy pics almost exclusively

>>938482786
Stroke me

>>938482802
Wow

>>938482802
no. filipinos are NOT Asian...

>>938482797
I would but you’re anonymous

>>938482802
best zoomer and 2nd best hapa

>>938482878
ooooh mamaaaa

here's ur 10/10 bro

>>938482878
and who is first best hapa?

>>938482878
>>938482998
Olivia Munn
Olivia Rodrigo

Best hapas

>>938482910
oooooooh biggy for viggy

>>938482998
It will always be Olivia Munn, anon

>>938483091
>he's bringing out the kini viki
this anon's playin for KEEPS

>>938482786
>it’s to tummy pics almost exclusively
Pretty based

>"best hapa" is a busted old roastie
uh

>>938483174
be nice!

oooooooooh!

>>938483379
Now that's a shotabro right there

>>938483174
This and her newest Grammys dress her most mind breaking outfits imo

>>938483144
>>938483156
I do have a few clothed pics saved on my phone, but cmon it’s all about the tum

>>938483174
Olivia Rodrigo is cute, but if you didn’t experience G4 Munn, you just don’t get it. She was an unashamed slut queen bullying the nerds who were her fanbase, it was glorious

>>938483439
Is everyone here mentally ill, or just plain stupid?

>>938483486
yes and yes

>>938483486
Yes

>>938483485
Suck on my bone

here come the bots

>>938483326
So sexy as always

kinda tired of posting celebs in a thread where 90% of the replies you get are spam

>>938483739
stop posting here entirely

this is the fastest spamming he can afford

J-Tard loves his wrestling, his vroom vroom, his little boys, and his 4chan pass

>>938483739
you don't post celebs, goddamn why do I even bother

>>938483979
>>938483960

beady is so fucking pathetic he uses the same broke script from 11 years ago to spam the exact same set of images 30 times a day, why?

>>938483855
What movie?

PARKERS GOOD AND PISSED

>>938484025
It seems to he annoying you quite a bit

stroking to bbc with the bros

>>938484110
after like 15 years yea its kind of annoying

TGIF cheers

FUCK BEADY

shit talkers, bots, and mmmspammers. welcome to /cel/. why are we treating spammers better than people who contribute?

>>938485137
>>938485294
what a woman

>>938482523
Keele Chelaa or what her name is?

>>938482802
>>938481905
>>938481048
>>938482998
>>938483107
>>938483174
>>938483763

CCCP plants are not celebs.

>>938485494
Fucking love her

>>938485639
>CCCP
the Soviet Union was broken before she was born, wtf are you talking about

>>938485639
It's CCP, you fucking retard.

BACK IN THE CCCP
DON'T KNOW HOW LUCKY YOU BE, BOY

>>938485639
It's CP, you fucking retard.
J-Tard told me he has terabytes of it.

>>938485698
mishka or liv? (both correct answers)

>>938486253
Liv got some tittymeat

>>938486253
Liv of course

>>938486312
her bosom is ample
>>938486346

>>938486363
Her bosom needs to be exposed

>>938486393
open bob pls darling

>>938486363
>>938486411
zoomer tits rock tbh

>>938486437
>>938486411
Big zoomer tits on a petite body too

>>938486437
why did her boobs big?

>>938486363
filipinos are NOT Asian.

fap number 3

>>938486740
based

>>938486501
>>938486504
I used to think she got lil implants, since they look a bit big for her petite frame, but idk for sure

>>938486698
Wait till tonight to ask choli, he would know

>>938486823
they move too good

We RESPECT Men of His stature and status.

>>938486896
Homeless and insane?

>>938486823
This is her best look I think

>>938486740
Good choice

>>938486876
>>938486823
Don’t even care if they’re implants, they look amazing

>>938486876
that’s what makes me have doubts, I think they’re just perky because she’s in her early 20s tbh

>>938486930
agreed

>>938486950
I don’t care either way, it’s just something I’m curious about

>>938487162
Smell my shitty unwashed ass

>>938485233
no one has an answer for you, like no one will ever have an answer for explaining why you are so mentally unstable

>>938487286
Suck the nutty shit outta my unwashed ass

>>938487162
Don’t get me wrong, she has loads of great looks. But that’s my personal fav. She’s amazing tbh

>>938487437
Slurp the wet shit off my legs as it trickles down before it hits the floor

>>938487472
Ask your faggot father to do it, kike

>>938487649
would

3 cums before noon, this does not bode well

>>938487649
Whomst?

>>938487694
Your dick doesn't work

>>938487704
Newfag BITCH

>>938487694
u need to learn to edge newtanon

>>938487804
>>938487804
>>938487804

>>938487694
Who got them?

>>938487345
why? I wasn't talking to you. Not like I'd want beady's stupid dumbshit excuse dahhh mmmm posters reason anyway