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Thread 939077961

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owner of my backyard No.939077961 >>939080436 >>939083468 >>939083560
Juvenile pest control: how to get rid of children in my backyard?
Children keep coming to my backyard. They broke down the fence somehow. I‘ll have it repaired at some point in the future. For now, what are some creative ways of combatting them? Telling them to gtfo doesn’t work.

Things I’ve already considered doing:
> planting thorny bushes
> bringing out the dog
> their parents

Please keep in mind they are still children, so using my axe or introducing them to uncle Rick aren’t feasible options.
Anonymous No.939078125 >>939078634
take their shoes and socks off and take pictures of their feet and post them
this is now a kid feet thread
also recite kid feet limerick
>kid feet, kid feet
>how smelly, how divine
>let me get some toast
>and smear kid toe jam
>on it for a delicious treat
Anonymous No.939078285
Death robot is the only way to be sure
Anonymous No.939078377
Burry a lot of meat 2-3 feet deep all around the fence.
Blast CCP speeches on repeat all day every day.
Place 4-5 barrels in which you ferment salted fish for fish sauce.
Place a huge pile of burnt cow bones in sight of fence entrance.
Make sure every time they see you you're crying uncontrollably.
Anonymous No.939078634
>>939078125
Sit in your kitchen, with the door closed, and call their spirits out
Anonymous No.939079363 >>939079620
Using high pitch noise could help, I would say with a frequency over 16 or 17 kHz would annoy them, and adults nowadays cannot hear very high frequencies but children can. Be careful if you have any pet It could hurt its ears.
owner of my backyard No.939079620
>>939079363
Thanks! I'll have to find a way to keep my pets away from it, but I'll definitely try it out.
Anonymous No.939080369 >>939080431
Spray em with the hose. Kept us out of peoples yards. An depending where you are. A rope fence with *will be shot on sight* and a paint ball gun will do a wounderful job.
owner of my backyard No.939080431
>>939080369
I think they're too young to blast them away. A hose might work though. Thanks!
Anonymous No.939080436 >>939081264 >>939081894
>>939077961 (OP)
tell the parents you're a registered chomo; never see a kid in your yard again
owner of my backyard No.939081264 >>939083290
>>939080436
and never see home again
Anonymous No.939081894 >>939083079
>>939080436
Lamb and chickens are good for it
owner of my backyard No.939083079
>>939081894
How so?
Anonymous No.939083290
>>939081264
>puting 12 eggs in your backyard to protect it
I'm not trying to sound like a dick but you should at least make sure those eggs aren't fertilized
Anonymous No.939083468 >>939086041
>>939077961 (OP)
You could follow all the homemade flea & tick treatment recipes in this thread, or actually take charge, and tell their shitty fucking parents that you're going to "disassemble" the next kid you find breaking into/trespassing on your property. Either with a shotgun or a hatchet.
You'll probably get the police called on you, as I once did, but the most it'll amount to is a lecture from the investigating officer which you can shoot down at any time by pointing out you have the right to protect your property.
Also, most small claims court filings are like $200, and with kids that undisciplined there's a 50/50 chance the trash ass parents want absolutely nothing to do with a courtroom. You don't even need to talk to the parents directly to take them to civil court.
But yeah, telling my neighbor I was going to kill his delinquent little shitbag son who vandalized one of my cars that I was going to flat out kill him on sight if he ever came onto my property again cured the problem instantly. Police were called, I was given the stern questioning.
>"Did you threaten to kill his son?"
>Yes, to protect my property, and I will absolutely kill that brat if he comes near my shit ever again.
>"W-well, you do have a right to protect your property, but you have to get along with yo-"
>Then you go tell him to keep his fucking son away from my shit.
That was the total exchange, and the officer went back and told the white trash shithead father what I had said. The kid was promptly sent back to his mother in a different state the next week and I never saw him again, which was a good thing for him.
Either take care of this shit directly or stop killing porn threads by crying about it when you don't have the will.
Anonymous No.939083560 >>939083933 >>939086066
>>939077961 (OP)
>planting thorny bushes
> bringing out the dog
Good ideas. Or there's "the mosquito". Children can hear higher frequencies than adults - set up a very loud, very high frequency noise source and they won't be able to stand the high pitched whine that you won't be able to hear it.
Even better, nor will their parents if the kids complain, so they'll side with you that you're not doing anything.
>https://mosquitoloiteringsolutions.com/
Anonymous No.939083933
>>939083560
use a bow
owner of my backyard No.939086041
>>939083468
Those are some good points. Many thanks
owner of my backyard No.939086066
>>939083560
Thanks for the idea