I have been fucking myself up with alcohol since I was 15, I even remember stealing my dads prescription painkillers to take while drinking just to feel okay. Now I am 25 fucked and can't kick alcohol everytime I try and stop I end up a shaking mess. Only time I could kick it for a few years was replacing it with weed and I ended up smoking 3+ gs a day at minimum now I just mix it. Don't have my dads prescription pills anymore but I sometimes mix it with anxiety medication or a few extra ibuprofen. I am a lost cause aren't I?