Thread 60726395

Anons it is time for me to stop fucking around and just become a permanent wagie.

But how the fuck do I explain the 4 years I spent tugging on my penis and pretending to myself that I was some kind of day trader on my resume?
The truth is that I just got lucky with crypto and was able to live off those funds duing that time while my actual attempts to actively manage my funds were essentially fruitless.
I am also retarded and all the info I consumed in that time on different investment strategies would leave my brain forever within a few weeks of losing interest in that strategy, so I don't know how well I can even sell the idea that I was into personal financial management in an interview.

Should I try and paint a picture to a prospective employer that I successfully managed my own funds for 4 years with a high enough return to fund my lifestyle over that time?
Should I not mention investing at all and come up with a different lie to explain that time?
Or should I just be honest and say that I got lucky with crypto and decided to just fuck around for a decent chunk of my 20s until my funds started to run low?

I am currently employed in a minimum wage position but I want to apply for apprenticeship roles in some larger companies that are currently doing their 2026 intake process. These roles do not require any qualification or experience but they are with larger companies with actual HR hiring processes that I will need to navigate.

just get friends and relatives to lie about work they gave you

>>60726395 (OP)
Us Chatgpt or Grok

>>60726395 (OP)
Just apply to a job that doesnt give a fuck about your resume. It really is that simple.

>>60726395 (OP)
say you were in school

>>60726412
I'm already filling a 2 year gap in my CV with this.
I don't know if my friend can sell a lie about a 6 year period of time that brings us almost up to the present, and I don't have anyone else in my life that is willing or able to sell a lie like that.
Is there some kind of self employment I could put down instead that is not gonna be a massive red flag?
I was thinking I could say that I did private tutoring for high school kids in math since the jobs I am applying for have some level of mathimatical requirement (not much), and I did attend uni majoring in finance before I dropped out.

>>60726422
Yeah plenty of $8/h jobs that fit this criteria, lmao.

>>60726422
I have a job currently that I didn't even need to make a resume for.
But I want to actually move up in the world a little bit. It is possible that with the connections I have made since I started working that I could get a better position without needing to create a resume or explain my past, but I would just be in the same postion a year from now when applying to larger companies anyway.

>>60726441
Random idea, if you've got friends/relatives with property then you can claim you were a property manager for them or managed a spare room on their behalf over the years, better yet if you've got anyone who rents out property or rooms rn then offer to help them in some administrative capacity and say you've currently been doing that

Say you had a 2 year gap year. It's not hard and an acceptable answer. Now youre bored of travelling and want to learn more about industries and building a life

>>60726395 (OP)
I have no clue about economy and stuff, but I was a NEET for years and now I work in tech

>how the fuck do I explain the 4 years I spent tugging on my penis and pretending to myself that I was some kind of day trader on my resume?
"I did freelance and min wage jobs while taking care of/helping a relative that had $ILLNESS/had $PERSONAL_ISSUE"
just say you signed NDAs when asked for proof, but make up some shit about day trading.

>I don't know how well I can even sell the idea that I was into personal financial management in an interview
oh yeah, that won't be of help

>should I just be honest and say that I got lucky with crypto and decided to just fuck around for a decent chunk of my 20s until my funds started to run low?
maybe try that and see their reaction?

Similar situation OP except I never ran out of funds. How do I tell an employer I got lucky gambling became a millionaire and decided to fuck off for 5 years.

>>60726395 (OP)
Just lie, and say you drove Uber. Seriously. You are done and want regular employment with benefits again after your stint of successful self employment.

Are you familiar with the tv series Kung Fu starring David Carradine (before his self-asphyxiation incident)

>>60726395 (OP)
lie and stretch timeframes so theres no gaps.
get a vpn and 7 different gmail accounts
do your own reference reviews, all they check is IP, browser cookie and email.
only a fucking retard is a good goy for HR bullshit.

>>60726521
>>60726503
>>60726727
>>60726500
>>60726441
retards
if they background check you say it was a position through a contractor
fake/shoop a paystub
if you're gonna be a NEET at least do it correctly jfc

>>60726395 (OP)
>Should I try and paint a picture to a prospective employer that I successfully managed my own funds for 4 years with a high enough return to fund my lifestyle over that time?
If thus was true, you would still be doing it. Nobody is gonna buy that. You're unironically better off lying on your resume.

>>60726500
I did exactly that. I said I was a houseman for my gf for ten years and got a job immediately.

>>60726395 (OP)
Why would you come to this conclusion now after everything pumped massively? I don’t trust your post at all. You’re either a bobo who got what he deserved or a seething wagie using your designated weekend personal time to try to drag /biz/ down to your wagelevel like a crab in a bucket

>>60726395 (OP)
Obviously, you neets are delusional

>>60726442
Just move to California. Isn't the minimum wage like $50 an hour over there or summat?

>>60726395 (OP)
"freelance" worked for me, 11 year gap, although it wasn't entirely untrue. I freelanced for like half of that.

My gap was only 2 years but I just extended my previous job to cover the gap

>>60726395 (OP)
I have a similar problem.