Thread 150449396

They got Bruce going up against the whole ass Ars Goetia. What in the hell is Joker supposed to be
https://x.com/Ssnyder1835/status/1969070541031018698

>>150449396 (OP)
This shit isn’t fair at all.

>>150449396 (OP)
WTF happened to the Joker? Did Bane punch him or something?

You can stop reading capeshit at any time. The power is in your hands.

Better than the old Joker. Again.

>>150449801
Kinda disappointed

>>150449396 (OP)
I bet it's just going to be a joker toxin thug, with the reveal that the venom project was a precursor to it's development.

>>150449396 (OP)
>they literally made Joker moloch
The youth adrenachrome harvesting from babies was a bit on the nose as it was but this takes the cake. Pretty based politically for the comics to go down this path.

>>150449396 (OP)
I wanna say this is just a metaphor for how evil Joker is supposed to be, but this book is goofy enough for him being a literal demonic monster not being too surprising

>>150449396 (OP)
>Black Mask is elevated from a minor crime boss and a retard into the owner of a massive PMC with direct ties to the Illuminati
>Mr. Freeze is a fucking Wendigo
>Bane is 20 feet tall
>Joker ate so many babies he turned into a dragon
What the fuck is Batman supposed to do to this

>>150450237
>What the fuck is Batman supposed to do to this
Learn magic by fucking Zatanna and then team up with JonCon and Dr. Fate to exorcise Gotham and the world.

>>150449396 (OP)
IIRC Absolute Batman was heavily influenced by stuff Snyder's kids were reading and playing that they got him into
I think Berserk was one of them

>>150450237
Lift more and get even bigger, brah

>>150449396 (OP)
This reminds me of what they did to Green Goblin in Ultimate

>>150450237
>What the fuck is Batman supposed to do to this
Learn some tricks from Absolute Tibetan monks

>>150450399
I guess they started reading Venom

>>150449396 (OP)
We live in an absolute society.

>>150450237
I'm convinced this version of Gothan takes place in literal Hell. Look what happened to Killer Croc, man.

>>150449396 (OP)
But does he live in a society

>>150450761
The universe was made by Darkseid, so...

>>150450777
Society made him this way

>>150449396 (OP)
They gave him the Ultimate Green Goblin treatment

>>150449396 (OP)
I fucking love this comic. It is a nice blend of Metal Gear and Resident Evil.

>>150449396 (OP)
This is what happens when you don’t rape your villains

>>150449396 (OP)
How the hell am I supposed to put bottom text on a creature like this?

>>150449396 (OP)
Now I want to see what Absolute Harley Quinn will look like.

My favorite Absolute redesign has been Wonder Woman. Her armor is actually pretty badass and cool

>>150450805
she's probably going to look like the fucking smile entity wearing a jester outfit.

>>150450805
I may guess she'll be some kind of hyena hellhound or something.

>>150450779
He's just returning the favour for making him endure this

>>150449396 (OP)
I don't like how pretty much all villains are connected in this and were created by the Joker

I mean, it's a Joker that lives in an universe influenced by Darkseid of all people, of course it's going to be something grotesque

Non zero chance Joker is just an actual demon this time around right? Would even have continuity with Diana

>>150450866
Yeah the way they're almost all being pumped out of Ark M like a monster factory feels like something out of a power rangers show

>>150450866
hey now, penguin was “created” by bane

>>150450805
>>150450839
>>150450850
All I know is that it is going to be messed up. I wouldn't be surprised if Harley was given something like the women seen with Joker. She might even be one of them.

>>150450904
Who was created by Joker in turn and works for him.

So Batman AF will permanently have venom-enhanced abilities too right

>>150450004
Nice

So does Bane completely fuck up Batman's life because he wants to make Batman like him so that he can retire with Batman as his successor working under the Joker?

>>150450936
Yeah it's part of his body now.

>>150449396 (OP)
If this what he looks like, then I can't wait to see how fucked up Clayface would look like, which he may looked something like pic related.

>>150450960
He wants to make Batman do the full procedure like him
I dunno why he particularly cares. Must be gay

>>150449396 (OP)
Does this mean Harley is a Sexy Clown Succubus? Please say yes

>>150449801
He's meant to be a gargoyle
However the path from literal immobile zombie to this still needs to be shown and explained
Also it's fitting considering Batman is Catholic that his villains should be demons

>>150450960
Not sure if he wants Batman to replace him, but yeah the plan was to make him go through the full Baneification process.

>>150450237
Beat their asses

>>150450972
He watched Austin Powers once and really wants his own Mini-Me

>>150450973
>Inb4 Harley is a child

>>150449396 (OP)
Surely Batman's no kill rule wouldn't apply here right

>>150451002
Lmao

>>150451015
If you kill Moloch Joker then you’d be just as bad as he is

>>150450970
Didn't we already see Clayface?

What did Bruce do to piss off Darkseid this badly

>>150451015
Batman would need to go for a kill to even have a chance

>>150450779
>>150450761
>>150450984
>Darkseid's gamble with Batman is seeing how much it takes he prays to God for guidance, knowing God will tell Bruce to kill

>>150451015
Bruce already killed Black Mask and maimed a bunch of his goons. He better kill off Joker.

>>150451067
This is survivable frankly

>>150451067
Joker came back from being a corpse, your point is kind of futile

>>150450401
he's a frauder with the venom stuff still in him

>>150451067
We can't be sure whether or not Batman stabbed Black Mask's eye sockets non-fatally here

>>150451037
>What did Bruce do to piss off Darkseid this badly

I haven't read batman in years but is this run really just "broke as fuck batman has to fight straight up analog horror silent hill tier versions of his villains"?

>>150451131
no

>>150451131
Yeh it’s based

WW is hot too

we need to blow up gotham

>>150451131
Yeah but the "Batman being broke" thing isn't being handled in a convincing way, it's fun in a dumb way though

>>150451131
Nah. The "working class version of Batman" conceit was abandoned pretty much straight away. Yeah his dad was a teacher instead of a billionaire but he still has all kinds of gadgets, batmobiles including one that's basically an entire driveable building, and high-tech hideouts all over the city.

>>150450824
She is pretty much the exact same character like regular Wonder Woman though. It's the least different absolute title.

>>150451152
>>150451180
Aw damn, well I guess it'd be too similar to punisher if they made him too believably broke.

How fucked up does it get?

>>150449396 (OP)
I am enjoying the absolute versions of Batman's rogues gallery. Professor Pyg and his dollotrons are going to be right at home in this universe.

>>150451148
They really got batman fighting endermen?

Just when you think Snyder's writing couldn't get any dumber, he somehow manages to "exceed" all expectations. I hate it.

>>150451191
Yeah but she's actually doing cool shit and fighting monsters instead of someone trying to flex their Gender Studies degree for the upteeth time or whatever the goddamn fuck Tom King is doing

>>150449396 (OP)
I don't like how much Batman jobs. He needs another win. He has done nothing but get his ass beat the last couple of issues. Give me Batgod.

>>150451262
>How fucked up does it get?
We haven't seen the full extent of how bad things can get, but Bane (who is a 20 foot mountain of muscle in this universe) literally punched Bruce's friends into the shape of his classic villains. No, that doesn't make sense. But it's what happened. Bane also cut off Bruce's arms and legs and smashed his skull with the bat symbol, but that was more like a dream sequence.

>>150450976
>it's fitting considering Batman is Catholic
he is?
That doesn't really work. Bruce Wayne is an Old Money WASP.
He could be High Church Episcopal, but that is just Catholicism with the serial number filed off

>>150451277
Professor pyg is already scary. Is his absolute variation going to looks like a fucking pig themed cenobite?

>>150449396 (OP)
Absolutely fucking dumb

>>150450960
No. He does want Batman to become like him, but not so he can retire. He wants Batman to join Joker's gang like he did, so they can "transform" Gotham the way they transformed Santa Prisca.

>>150451325
It's his legs being fused at the knees tht gets me the worst

>>150449396 (OP)
>Big Batman's enemy is Big Joker
It makes sense but it's still hilarious.

>>150449396 (OP)
>>150450004
I see Scott Snyder has been doing his homework on Satanic conspiracy theories with the rich. Now I want to see how the Court of Owls will be like in this universe.

>>150451325
Bro...

>>150451457
Given current trend they will be a cult of moloch worshiping were-owls

>>150451325
What did he do to make bane that mad?

>>150451457
>>150451471
>Batman infiltrates Bohemian Grove run by the Court of Owls
I would read that.

>>150451502
He put lifts in his shoes to appear taller.

>>150451191
Darkseid hates her the least out of the trio plus she is also divine so she gets god points that means she's having a pretty good time all things considered. Meanwhile Bruce and Clark are getting bullied more and more every month

>>150450237
Cut their hands off.

>>150451545
If batman's this fucked what the hell is superman going through?

>>150450805
She's gonna be Bruce's mom, and it's gonna be brutal.

>>150450805
I want to see Absolute Gagsworth.

>>150449396 (OP)
I think this is just artist interpretation because he’s framed as a joker card

>>150450237
Beat the shit outta them

>>150451130
Making it canon that Darkseid’s doing this for killing him with the Radion bullet would make up for all the stupid bullshit retcons Snyder has done throughout his career.

>>150451502
Bane wanted Bruce to become just like him, which means Bruce needs to voluntarily submit to the Joker because Bane himself voluntarily submitted to the Joker as well. Since he couldn't "break" Bruce directly, he decided to fuck with him by going after his friends.

And yes, as >>150451531 says Bane mutilated Penguin in order to mock him for wanting to be "big." He also burned exactly 50% of Two-Face's body because he felt like Harvey was trying to live two lives, i.e. be a respectable lawyer while also being friends with low-lives and criminals, and he punched Riddler in the brain until he developed autism.

>>150451569
Last I recall he was strapped into a chair while Brainiac beamed nonstop murder scenarios involving all his family, friends, and enemies into his brain. All this to rewire Superman into a compliant murder machine for Ra's al Ghul who is some immortal ultra elite controlling the world from behind the scenes.

I guess it makes sense why Bruce wouldnt kill his friends as villains but if black mask was supposed to be a "non lethal eye stabbing" I dont see how Bruce would justify to himself not murdering bane after this.

>>150451325
Wtf

>>150451569
>>150451704
It's kinda crazy that Wonder Woman seems happier in the absolute universe than a lot of her more traditional versions. It seems like nothing phases her.

>>150451675
True

>>150451740
That's because you can't mistreat a woman these days, even in a fictional story.

>>150451740
She has a big advantage in that she grew up in hell. Even taking into account that Circe was somehow a better mother than her actual mother in many continuities, everything is going to look lik an improvement if you spent your formative years in the literal worst place imaginable.

>>150451279
>Goes immediately to Minecraft
It's clearly referencing a Wendigo

Absolute Godzilla. Remember guys, this is technically Elseworlds.

>>150451833
>Absolute Godzilla

>>150451842
Thanks I hate it.

This isn’t the first time Snyder’s done something like this

>>150449396 (OP)
>snyder
>not being a hack 0% speedrun

>>150450805
like this and Joker will birth her in his image

>>150449396 (OP)
Joker culo

>>150450237
Absolute Venom gives him total control over his muscle cells and the ability to retain infinite information

>>150451325
What the fuck did Bane do to him

>>150452022
He beat him so hard it rearranged his skeleton without damaging any of his internal organs.

>>150451602
>Gaggy around Absolute Joker like it is Fantasy Island
Yes

>>150451716
>I dont see how Bruce would justify to himself not murdering bane after this
He just probably can't do it, lol.

>>150449396 (OP)
Violator...this book really is just Batman as a early 90's Image comic.

>>150449790
Isn't that the entire point of the Absolute universe? Hope being the underdog and yadda yadda yadda?

>>150451740
The Amazons are worse off in this universe, since they're literally all dead barring like maybe a handful you can count on your fingers like the ones in the labyrinth, but just like Superman being the Last Son of Krypton doesn't stop him from being a happy and well adjusted adult thanks to the Kents, Diana being the Last Amazon doesn't make her an edgelord because Circe worked overtime to be mother of the century raising Diana with love and care despite living in literal Hell.

>>150451277
>I am enjoying the absolute versions of Batman's rogues gallery.

I think they need to have Bane keep smacking the goofy into them. That's the funniest way they could've done it.

>>150451886
Cool

>>150452065
Kek

>>150452910
That's not even a joke. That is almost literally the exact words the comic says.

>>150449396 (OP)
Guessing Snyder's being quite literal with the Joker Pale Man thing from his Batman Endgame this time around.

>>150450237
Learn the art of double jumping from his half Brazilian ex girlfriend

>>150451325
>>150451682
I fucking hate this tryhard bullshit.

>>150449396 (OP)
I want to like this, I really do.
But even if the design is cool, the joker paint over makes him look really fucking silly, like those cheap plastic toys I would find around shaddy markets.

>>150453150
paint.
it's not paint
that;s skin

>>150453179
It's a drawing, it's painted.

If we put it in a black and white filter, it looks almost intimidating, but with the joker colors on, it just looks stupid.

>>150450779
Is this actually a thing? I've only kept up with Absolute Batman and Manhunter.

>>150450237
Don't worry, he'll have prep time to deal with them

>>150453243
Yeah

>>150453243
Darkseid showed up for a panel in MM

>>150453235
yeah, but then how will people recognize it as Joker still?

>>150451262
He’s not exactly “Broke.” He’s specifically working class, in the sense that he actually works for his money. While his job is high end construction/engineering, it’s still paycheck to paycheck.
I think he also builds a lot of his stuff out of melted scrap metal.
Not only that but he actually recycles a lot of his resources because it takes him too long to reliably forge or build new equipment.
I also think it’s heavily implied he flat out stole the Batmobile. Logically? I think he took a decommissioned dump truck and rebuilt it
He also probably steals a lot of shit like gas.

>>150449801
Snyder has implied that Absolute Joker is an immortal half human/half demon abomination that requires constant blood transfusions to keep a human form and is based on what Snyder desperately wanted to do in his New 52 run via Endgame but was barred from doing, which was to wholesale retcon Joker as an immortal demon.

>>150453600
So he basically wanted to turn the Joker into the Violater from the Spawn comics???

>>150451037
Darkseid is the one person Bruce will break his "no kill" rule for and Darkseid only just recently recovered from Bruce shooting him, since he shattered Darkseid into multiple variants of himself in the multiverse

I would’ve preferred this over the dump truck. Seems a bit more believable for him to steal and modify it

>>150450779
Why is Darkseid an edgelord weeb, why does he want the DCU to be a mix of shitty grunge art and Dragon Ball Z, why the fuck would Darkseid think this is a good idea

>>150453726
Darkseid has literally always been a petty asshole with a flair for the dramatic. Darkseid reading Berserk and going "oh man, I'm gonna make Batman WISH he only had to deal with Griffith" isn't any sillier than the last 55 years of his comics history. This is the dude who put his rival's hostage exchange son through a sadistic death trap obstacle course orphanage run by a woman named Granny Goodness. This is the dude who breaks into people's houses with intergalactic Mother Box boom tube teleportation just to lounge in their favorite armchair reading Mein Kamph. Darkseid is a lot of things but he has never been stoic, pragmatic, or emotionless. He is literally a moustache twirling villain and proud of it

>>150450004
A true Molech statue for sacrifice has outstretched hands to place the child to burn.

>>150453150
Whatever happened to that Greg Smallwood Batman the Barberian comic they announced last year?

>>150453726
>why does he want the DCU to be a mix of shitty grunge art and Dragon Ball Z, why the fuck would Darkseid think this is a good idea
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EYWbatgKN4g

>>150453726
Darkseid is an edgelord shitposter, always has been

>>150453723
>Bat-Killdozer
LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>>150449396 (OP)
Welcome back Ultimate Green Goblin.

>>150450761
>>150450779
>>150453243
Yes read this.
https://batcave.biz/reader/33045/233578

>>150453726
Midlife Crisis

The current DC storyline that birthed the Absolute Universe line, is Darkseid realizing he is forever destined to lose against Earth's heroes and so he tricked Superman to "kill" him, so he could turn into energy and fuck off to a new parallel Earth that he can corrupt and he's basically treating Earth's heroes the way America Fererra treated her kid's Barbie dolls, to cope with the fact that he's a loser and will always be a loser

>>150454751
>Darkseid going to a /co/ Bad-Anon. trying to cope with the fact that he'll always lose to the heroes.

>>150453600
>>150453639
Man really wants to prove himself as the Absolute Snyder

>>150454891
>>150454751
Darkseid is a metaphor to Snyder and his need to make dark Berserk shit to prove himself that he still got it.

>>150449396 (OP)
>>150451886
I used to have a profile on Twitter way back when Snyder was writing Zero Year I think, I used to be a huge fan since Court of Owls and I found this leaked cover where the Zero Year suit was revealed, he kindly asked me delete the tweet because spoilers, so I did and he followed me back and sent me some unreleased preview as a "reward" which was pretty neat.

One day I retweeted this fanart and it was the first and only time he QRT'd me, saying he enjoyed the hell out of this take on Batman and Joker.

Now, I don't know if this art was solely responsible for all the imagery he's provided for these characters over the years, but if so I kinda feel like 0,5% responsible for that and it makes me giggle sometimes.

I love the idea that Darkseid made Absolute Batman's life a living hell specifically as payback from Batman shooting him with the Radon bullet in Final Crisis..

>>150454751
>>150454934
We discussed this whole Darkseid situation in previous Absolute DC thread and here's the thing, all Absolute characters are far better than their regular versions. Bruce is so OP he got more than regular Batman had from nothing, also his mom is alive. Now he finally started the whole via crucis but still we know Batman will win so what's the point? "oh he lost his friends" oh fuck those freaks everybody knew they would turn like that.

>>150452155
>Joker cums from the sheer silliness of this man.

>>150454972
Kek, I bet this was just another one in his "the Joker is the Devil" folder, but you never know with those guys. An old friend of mine is a bonafide sperg and he had such encounters, he once said he wanted Dan Slott dead in a forum and Slott posted there too, he got really mad, asked to have him removed, found his twitter and sent a lot of messages saying he was going to tell his parents. The admins got a hold of the situation and told Slott to fuck off, they had a good laugh but told my friend to pipe down.

Still, my sperg of a friend didn't learned his lesson and started shit talking another writer, I can't remember who but it was a DC guy. He said something that hit a nerve and this guy sent messages to him for FOUR YEARS, it went like
>year 1: what did you said to me you little shit?
>year 2: what, no answer you little shit?
>year 3: hey, still mute? Not so tough hmmm?
>year 4: still nothing?

He would show us the messages and we could not stop laughing while he went "shit shit shit what if this guy sues me? But still I'm on the right he should die or at least stop writting, everything he does is shit I would tell the judge that". Guy was such a figure, but it's really dumb how comic writers in general have huge, touchy egos.

>>150455334
>Kek, I bet this was just another one in his "the Joker is the Devil" folder
Yeah, could totally be the case, I just find it funny when I think about it in retrospect.

Dan Slott had a lot of my friends blocked back in the day and we weren't even making fun of him, just pointing out why his main book at the time didn't really work because X and Y. I don't know how people like this stay in the industry for so long, can't take any criticism at all after decades writing the most popular characters in the world.

>>150454379
Like, I can imagine him giving it an extended cockpit, making it faster, and so on

how strong would absolute batkek be

>>150450237
Aura farm his way into success

>>150451842
>Implying it wouldn't be the Stan Winston design

>>150449396 (OP)
I think we're past the point of rape working now

>>150457086
I think Absolute Joker is the one who is going to rape Gordon. That's a fucking demon right there.

Im surprised no one has mentioned BANE BRUTALISING ALL OF BATMAN'S FRIENDS INTO MONSTROSITIES

>>150453578
There is a flashback sequence to when he was with Selina, before Batman, and they are having sex on a bed full of cash. I bet next issue we are going to find out that they were both cat thieves together for a while but then Bruce had a Simba from the Lion King moment where he remembered who he is and decided to ditch the bitch and fight crime or something

Wait
How old is Bruce in this universe?

>>150457426
24, literally guts

>>150457462
>Robin will be this universe's Griffith

>>150449396 (OP)
Maybe he can just outsource him to Clark?

>>150449396 (OP)
If this is what the joker looks like in the absolute universe then I am frightened by what could be the appearance of professor pyg and scarecrow

>>150453600
Tynion did a better job of that via his Endgame backup stories where a handful of low-level lunatics from Arkham each had a separate origin story that included some messed-up version of the Joker visiting them at their lowest and giving them that final push towards madness

>>150457462
>24 years old and dealing with eldritch abominations

>>150457489
Clark is busy with Brainiac and Ra's al Ghul. The title of the next issue he is going to be fighting in Smallville.

>>150451457
Reminder Elon Musk is a LARPing fruit and only does this evil satanic aesthetic to pretend HE'S the Paypal mafia-borne antichrist when in reality it's his gay pal Peter Thiel (who is doing a lecture run trying to convince people he totally isn't).

>>150451131
Yes and the normies love it. Multiple videos have already been made talking about how Scott Snyder clearly doesn't get the Batman mythos or intentionally discards it but I think people don't realize in a sense that's what people want, a new beginning with major differences and hard action and edge to sell.

>>150455072
>write yourself out of creation
>break the infinite loop of defeat
>become sole master of an entire universe
>carefully manipulate events so that this one guy, on a specific planet, during a specific timespan has the worst life possible
>make a silent cameo on a different comic book
>refuse to elaborate
>disappear forever

>>150451592
This

>>150453038
>This whomps!

>>150453578
It's a fucking BelAZ
You don't just steal one

>>150458647
Batman does.

>>150450905
I saw someone suggest that it could be a brainwashed version of Martha Wayne.

>>150451592
Holy fuck that's horrific. I love it

It's incredible how much Scott Snyder made me 180 on Absolute Bats
>He's working class but can still take on a paramilitary organization who destabilizes nations? God he's too overpowered
>6 or so issues later
>I stand corrected. Fucking hell Bruce, you need all the help you can get with this shit

>>150457413
Bruce probably made a lot of his money from more illicit means like theft.
Also he canonically used the stock market

>>150451067
He didn't kill him

>>150449396 (OP)
>>150454399
What if they kissed...?

Absolute Robin will be Mary Grayson

nigga wanted to write spawn but didn't have the rights

>>150450805
Unchanged in contrast to what passes as a male clown in this universe.

>>150450237
Don't forget Poison Ivy is this.

>>150459682
That's not her, anon

>>150457582
Why the fuck does he look melted?

>>150451842
So fallout chameleon

Absolute Gordon's 10 ft wide junk should tame it.

>>150460079
>Absolute Joker is a 10ft tall gargoyle monster with a micropenis
>Absolute Gordon is a guy with dwarfism that drags along a 10ft cock
Absolute pottery

>>150451339
He might reshape his own face to look exactly like a pig or maybe graph an actual pig to his face

>>150451339
He'll be a completely normal veterinarian who ends up saving Bruce's life after he crashes into his office

>>150449396 (OP)
Jesus christ, Absolute Scarecrow and Absolute Solomon Grundy are going end up being ultra crazy and fucked up.

>>150449396 (OP)
so absolute batman version of everything is just big dumb monster
>absolute bane is bane... IF HE WAS BIGGERER
>absolute croc is.... A BIGERER CROC MONSTER
>absolute joker is.... A BIG MONSTER

Imagine Absolute professor pyg

>>150460784
"Apokalyptic abominations beyond Bruce's comprehension" is a better description.

>>150460890
yea its kinda cool just not for me. but maybe a breath of fresh air for some.

>>150449396 (OP)
Is Joker's Killer Croc in Absolute Universe?

>>150460901
yeah also don't let visuals sway you. absolute bane isn't just a bigger bastard now.

>>150460784
Black Mask is just some dude with high tech helmets. Riddler, Two Face, and Penguin are just disfigured. Catwoman looks normal.

>>150449396 (OP)
Darkseid was still pretty mad about getting shot by Batman, wasn't he?

>>150461092
Darkseid is just a bully who is mad that people keep stopping him from bullying everyone.

>>150451148
If Gotham is this bad what the fuck goes on in Absolute Hub City you think

>>150461333
Either a completely flipped version if it, a utopia that has zero tolerance for any wrongdoing, or a pure hellhole where every form of every crime imaginable is committed daily.

>>150460890
>big monster
>"apocalyptic abomination beyond comprehension"
Are all ABatmanfags literally 12 Y/O browns with rotten minds?

>>150461361
Beyond BRUCE’s comprehension

>>150449396 (OP)
Hope they give Absolute Batman a legit superpower.

>>150449396 (OP)
Just more of Joker for Batman to rape. Go make Gotham around Batman

>>150461446
He has venom in his body like Bane. Maybe he will hulk out and beat the shit out of Joker.

>>150450237
If this was the 90s
>call Jason Blood
>Etrigan absolutely kills the eldritch abomination with hell fire
>Bruce looks on with a "the fuck was i gonna do look"
>Jason and Bruce laugh about it later

Is Batman fighting literal white nationalists here or was that just an article headline? I was about to start collecting these and saw this going around. It would be so gay to have art that good and it's just fag shit.

>>150450237
Apparently Absolute Deathstroke and KGBeast went through the same procedure as Bane.

>>150461483
They are clearly based on the KKK.

>>150461484
God this shit is freakish

>>150454742
thanks bro

>>150451682
>>150451325
I love this tryhard bullshit.

>>150459848
Too many adrenachrome infusions.

But yeah Peter Thiel is genuinely scary. People rage every day about guys like Trump and Musk because they're always doing their dumb nonsense in public, but they're too stupid and too horny for publicity to do the genuinely scary stuff. It's guys like Thiel and Srinivasan who are setting up experimental libertarian cities (both actual cities like the Prospera Economic Zone in Honduras and virtual "cities" like Afropolitan) in preparation for their master plan of breaking up the USA into independent "Freedom Cities" which are essentially company towns on a massive scale. JD Vance is also one of Thiel's creatures which is why it would be terrible if something happened to Trump and Vance took over.

>>150461526
He would just get Ted Korded if he actually does that.

>>150461411
Again, dipshit, they're just big mutated monsters. In what way is this "beyond Bruce's comprehension"? Doesn't he live in the same world as Wonder Woman?
>oh no, this shady bunch that does experiments made this guy... BIGGER AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH I'M GOING INSAAAAAAAAAAAAANEEEEEE SAVE ME CROCMAN
Dial down the shilling.

>>150461526
>Thiel and Srinivasan
Don't forget Bryan Johnson who's trying to look young again by harvesting his own son's blood.

>>150461483
It's from SDCC and yes, Batman AF is tackling the biggest problem in the world right now; white heckin nationalists!
>entire series is literally Antifa Batman Vs. Slenderman FanArt
>browns lap it up and it sells like hotcakes
The Big 2 should just die.

>>150455334
Wouldn't even say comic writers but writers in general.
>years back Stephen King was first shitposting on Twitter about Trump winning back in 2016
>respond back maybe he should stop bitching, get back on the cocaine train and give us Maximum Overdrive 2
>man locked his replies and blocked me

>>150451067
You can live without eyes

>>150461561
Bryan's fine. If rich people want to inject themselves with weird shit and aren't injecting others with weird shit that's honestly the best outlet for whatever wealth induced-mental illness they get.

>>150457740
It's oddly funny just how many characters have usurped the DC universe over the years to make reality bend to their will
>Darkseid
>Joker
>Dr Manhattan
>Brainiac
>Batman who giggles
And thats just off the top of my head.
>that feel when no universe controlled by Lobo
it'd be essentially Heavy Metal + looney toons

>>150461333
>Absolute Hub City

Is a smoking crater because they assholed way too hard.

>>150449396 (OP)
wow the clown prince of crime!

>>150459735
>Isley Ecosystem

>>150449396 (OP)
I don't care about Snyder's writing, I am just in for Dragotta.

>>150461526
The fact that they're being so brazen and public about it (same goes for the Palantir guys actually) makes me think they're aware that something big might be happening soon and that there's no point hiding it anymore

>>150453994
This. Also he goes commando everyday, the man has no concept of mercy.

>>150455115
>We discussed this whole Darkseid situation in previous Absolute DC thread and here's the thing, all Absolute characters are far better than their regular versions.
Its so so. OA is now a weord cosmic cult that converted John and Guy so hard they are fine with Hal being glued to a amoral cosmic force that already murdered people. And that amoral force is stated to same thing as the green lantern.
Martian Manhunter is incorporal and John's son got corrupted by the White Martian.
Batman's support network just got brutalized, just after he lost his best friend.
Superman got the worst of it, but I dropped his book because I didn't like it.
Every adult around Wally either wants to kill him or imprison him.
Diana got the better end of the stick I guess.

>>150451336
He always has been but over time it's gotten mentioned less and less to falsely present the narrative of the no-kill rule being due to "hecking wholesome Atheist ethics" when it's always been based on his religious values

>>150462370
The revisionism is not new, either
Writers have been trying to retcon Bruce as an Atheist liberal since the 1970s

>>150449396 (OP)
Ayo he kinda freaky

>>150449396 (OP)
LET'S GET READYYYY TOOOOO TANGOOOOOOOO

>>150449396 (OP)
>the whole ass Ars Goetia
That's what i been thinking
Solomon Keys meets SCP or something

>>150450805
Vagina dentata or something

>>150453726
>and Dragon Ball Z
never actually read Dragon Ball award

>>150461484
>another in the middle east
You don’t think…?

>>150458880
If anything that means he has connections to the Russian mafia and Russian government
>Inb4 they reveal the Waynes are descendants of the escaped Romanovs

>>150450237
Hes gonna affix crosses to his fists and punch him back to hell

>>150460680
Absolute Scarecrow is going to be a Kruger reference. They already danced with that idea with Injustice. Grundy is something I want to see

>>150449396 (OP)
so they just using the angels from end of eva?

>>150463000
Grundy is gonna be a cementary
Bane will go after batman and ground pound cementary on Grundy Street
He will be like that pile of corpses from bloodborne

>>150462382
>>150462370
>>150451336
>>150450976
>>150449801
Is he Catholic? I've never seen him be depicted as Catholic.

>>150450804
Carefully

I feel like this series is too edgy, unless you look at it like Batman is in Hell. I feel like you really need the context of this being Darkseids edge world, where characters are made to suffer. I don't know how Bruce will ever survive or beat these villains unless he has something like the Presence at his side.

It’s not fully 1:1 but it does feel like Snyder took some cues from Berserk

>>150451833
It's not Elseworlds

>>150463075
Oh no
Joker is gonna rape selina into harley quinn

>"This whomps you Bruce"
CHILLZ

>>150463064
All of the Absolute titles feel "bad" in their own way. I don't mean bad writing in this context, just that the world is worse off and more geared against the main characters than usual. Which makes sense in the context of this being an entire universe influenced by Darkseid's will which was never supposed to have heroes in the first place, but without that context it feels pointless and exhausting.

ABM does feel more negative because it's been leaning more into the body horror aspect, but it's not the exception. It's not like the other heroes are that much better off. AMM is up against some abstract psychic entity that can control minds on a massive scale and who is now hiding inside the animated corpse of his host's young son. AFlash is a runaway child being hunted by a clandestine government superscience squad lead by a genderswapped Reverse-Flash. ASM only recently arrived on Earth, has gotten fucked over at pretty much every turn, and has been partially brainwashed by an extra psychotic, extra sadistic version of Brainiac. I'm not even sure what's going on in AGL but OA sounds more like some vaguely spiritual brainwashing factory than the guardians of galactic law and order.

AWW is the real exception here, as others have already pointed out. Even though her backstory is a lot more negative and less hopeful than what it usually is, and almost all of the other Amazons are dead apart from a handful who were already in deep enough shit to be overlooked, her adventures are still mostly the same. Yeah she's up against giant monsters and literal gods, but that's not new territory for her. And now they've even been building up her supporting cast so she's not just one hero against the world. I'm not sure if this is just the writer doing his own thing, some editorial mandate because DC doesn't want to see WW broken, or if they're building something up just to bring it down around her later on (like they did with Batman's friends), but it is noticeable.

I'm not really sure how Batman doesn't believe in God, considering he's met the Spectre on several occasions.

>>150462723
Yeah

>>150461526
Yeesh

>>150463075
>>150463135
Unironically, if they have Selina be mind broken into Harley by the Joker, I'm going to buy the whole series in a heartbeat

>>150463278
I feel like they were building up the cast for Batman, only to cuck them into caricatures.

>>150460243
>Absolute Gordon is a guy with dwarfism that drags along a 10ft cock
We've seen Gordon though, he's a pretty swole former Marine

>>150461483
>>150461564
>Thread is good
>That means fags have to come in and smear shit on the walls
Every fucking time like clockwork

>>150461705
It doesn't matter what it is, their logic is dying together on a hill is better than dying alone on one, they've already mentally checked out of every solution that doesn't involve dying on a hill

>>150459682
Bane will eventually end up becoming Swamp Thing
Change my mind

>>150463075
You joke but Absolute Wonder Woman is closer to Berserk that Batman is

It'd be pretty boring if Batman's friends became villains just because they got brain damage.

>>150451339
There was a straight-up pigman in Ark M, but I don't know if that was THE Pyg.

>>150457310
I think Gordon will have his work cut out for hin this time

>>150455334
Hold on, Dan Slott threatened to kill some random troll's parents?

>>150463962
Explain. I feel like Bat and Guts obv. Alfred as Skullknight. Bane as Zodd as they are the ones to introduce the hero to the real stakes and of course, the majestic but terrifying Joker as Griffith. The person I got this image from put Selena as Casca but idk, we haven’t seen that yet. I will say there is a higher chance Martha is Casca in that she is used as a way to break something inside of him and his goal would be to take care of her

>>150449396 (OP)
As goofy as AbBats gets at least it’s about a hero going on adventures and fighting villains
Superman /GL/ Flash is just endless set up

I binge-read Absolute Batman last night and really liked it. I didn't know it was some weird Darkseid Multi-verse thing, I just took it as an Elseworlds without context and thought it was pretty good. In that same vein, I tried Absolute Wonder Woman and I really did not care for the first issue. Felt boring and lame, as opposed to ABM which pulled me in immediately.

If I didn't like Issue 1, should I keep bothering with AWW? Does it pick up and get better? Or is it more of the same?

>>150464540
Abs WW moreorless stays the same throughout, pretty much just feels like a chick discovering DND for the first time. If you didn't like #1 it's maybe not for you. It is by far the least edgy of the Absolute line up so far for what it's worth.

Regarding the Darkseid thing, all you need to know is that Darkseid got fed up of always being the big bad guy destined to lose every time so he tricked the heroes into "killing" him and in a convoluted way it allowed him to escape and create his own separate universe shaped by his own ideals, and apparently his idea of a hero is an underdog who rises up against all odds to succeed

>>150464540
AbWW is generally pretty solid but I think they spent too much time on the first story where she fights a giant sea monster

>>150464793
>and apparently his idea of a hero is an underdog who rises up against all odds to succeed

Ah, and that's what I like from ABM, along with the body horror and cool monsters. It feels like Bruce doesn't have "as much" plot armor as usual, which makes the story a bit more interesting. To be fair, ABM doesn't really get going until midway through the Zoo Animals story, but as I said I was pulled in pretty quick.

The Diana origin was boring (and I didn't care for the style of dialogue), the first fight was boring (I'm not sure about how Diana usually fights, I'm not a WW fan), and I wasn't convinced with the generic big red monsters. Pegasus being made of bones was kinda cool but I wasn't super excited to get the next issue, which is why I'm wondering if all of the Absolute line, if following the same idea of "heroes being proper underdogs" is as good, if not better, than ABM.

When I saw someone describe AWW being "Diana vs Eldritch horrors" I was interested, because I love me some bleak abyssal terrors, but these little red sperm things with wings don't exactly open up my wallet (or download folder). Again, if AWW get's better I'll give it another shot, or maybe someone could recommend other Absolutes. I think Superman is just getting started and I was never a big Flash guy, so if those are good, let me know.

>>150464540
I like AWW the most but if you don't like the tone of it then it probably won't grab you much.

>>150464390
Dark fantasy aesthetics, Wondy's giant ass sword and black armor. She actually has one arm, the one with the tats is a magic prosthetic. Granted it's not like both books can't be inspired by Berserk in different ways. Hell one could argue Bane fucking up his friends was Bruce's Eclipse moment

>>150464793
>his idea of a hero is an underdog who rises up against all odds to succeed
I mean is he wrong

>>150461526
Thiel is retarded, just search up his Vc firm's little get together called Apocalypse Ball and see just how far they've deluded themselves with their whole larp

>>150461934
Diana lost her entire people and support network
She doesn't have one arm was raised by a witch, monsters, and Hades denizens
Diana who defined herself princess of the amazons born leader ambassador to men's world doesn't know what a amazon is and solitary warrior.

What truly what sets her apart is that it makes her core traits shine brighter in a universe that's darker, Diana truly fights for truth and equality even more than Batman and Superman and isn't afraid of anything

>>150464793
I wonder why Darkseid went so light

>>150458924
>Joker literally fucks Bruce's mother
Given how young Bruce is, would Martha be roughly the same age as Joker?

>>150450976
>Also it's fitting considering Batman is Catholic that his villains should be demons
Ah, So Absolute Scarecrow is just going to be one of the Deadly Sins. Or Chthulu

>>150451325
Shouldn't have said the n word

>>150465595
mommy

>>150465595
I just want to give the writer credit for not going the cheap gender issues route instead opting to just make shit cool it's really refreshing to read a comic about a woman character just doing cool shit

>>150463037
I think he's usually an atheist raised Catholic. It's not a big part of his character though.

>>150465891
I feel like it's kinda the opposite. The book is laser focused on the bond Diana has with her mother, which is still a gender issue, but it's just not a "men are bad" thing so it feels totally fresh and new.

>>150465633
Joker is like 150+ years old in this continuity.

absolute harley quinn

>>150450905
>things moving in their bellies
Uh oh

>>150449396 (OP)
Real talk; I'm not the only one who finds this Absolute Bruce kind of a boring protagonist and is more invested in this Joker, right? Bruce and his posse are very generic, and the majority of the villains aren't anything spectacular either. But Joker and Bane are the two characters I've found the most well written and interesting. I'm actually excited to see what Joker's whole deal is. Although I fully expect him to be written like Discount Wesker and be some Pennywise demon. Which makes me wonder if the book will keep going down the horror angle and bring in Zatanna.

>>150466010
>it's just not a "men are bad" thing
Pretty much yeah and I'm all for it. It really is nice to read a piece of pop culture media written by a woman about a woman character that didn't go the easy route or is at least giving us the sugar before the medicine or whatever

>>150466121
>Which makes me wonder if the book will keep going down the horror angle and bring in Zatanna.
>Mfw she is the half naked witch to Bruce's barbarian with a big axe.
GOGOGOGOFOGOFO

>>150466189
Batman should always be a Knight desu, Barbarians suck dick. Maybe Alfred will mold him into his proper form. Or Deathstroke, when he appears fully.

>>150466121
I won’t say he is the most interesting. Maybe with Selena on board and anything happening it can spice things up. But he’s a good vehicle to explore the world. I want to see him be pushed to his limits. Since he does have stakes as we’ve seen.

>>150466121
Zatanna, Scarecrow, Tim, and Stephanie have all been confirmed iirc. Dick and Jason have already appeared. The upcoming one-shot will introduce Sandman, Wildcat, Hawkman, Iron Munro, and Green Arrow.

>>150466062
absolute Mr Bloom is just basically making him even more like Slenderman
absolute Hugo Strange is Kulan Gath wanting to be the Absolute Batman
absolute Mad Hatter is The Hatman creepypasta
absolute Victor Zsasz is Pinhead

>>150466121
>I'm not the only one who finds this Absolute Bruce kind of a boring protagonist
I feel like the interest in AB is more in the sheer indescribable horrors beyond human comprehension that is his developing rogues gallery than bruce himself

>>150461484
Wont the Venom inside of them eventually get depleted thus returning them back to a normal non-enhanced human?

>>150463037
Wayne family always struck me as being pretty WASPy. They were in America during the colonial days

>>150458647
Why not? He probably stole one that was being used to build ark-m

>>150463037
He's Jewish. His mom is Jewish so he's Jewish

>>150466459
Depends on exactly what modifications were made to him in order to facilitate this I guess
In the spirit of this book being absolutely retarded, I'm betting on Batman being able to turn into Man Bat following the experiments on him. Waylon will also be able to revert back from Killer Croc to human form but will still feels cannibalistic hunger

>>150466847
>absolutely retarded
>Absolute Retard

>>150466847
>I'm betting on Batman being able to turn into Man Bat
Hey, why not.

>Venom Batman vs Joker
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jz0JfrMNfZg

>>150450237
Are there plans for WW+Supes to team up with him?
Most of the villains here seem way out of his league

>>150449396 (OP)
>>150450237
Since Batman has venom in him I hope he hulks out like Spear on the ape men in Primal. He at least needs to beat the shit out of Bane.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EwHPKBJf2o

Darkseid is an asshole.

>>150467082
He won't.
He's not going to play Bane's game

>>150466847
>Batman being able to turn into Man Bat
Nah we already saw Man Bat.

>>150467082
Funny,he looks smaller here than he actually is

>>150463383
He does belive in God but since he met one of his aspects bound to a detective he just does his usual stuff cause he cant really affect God or spectre
Its same logic as "oh cool aliens are real now leave me alone I need to file my taxes"

>>150467609
Fair

>>150449396 (OP)
So is it true the Scott Snyder is personally slipping into the DMs of everyone that says "this looks retarded" and whining at them?

>>150450761
Literally is a hell universe.

>>150467098
God I love bruces face in the middle panel. That is the face of someone who knows he is about to get his ass beat

>>150466107
>Joker is actually Thomas Wayne

>>150450501
Ugh, don't remind me

>>150467758
>It was at this moment that Bruce knew... he fucked up.

>>150467098
for some reason I love that Bane calls him "friend" lol
>check THIS out buddy boy!
>how about this one, chum?

>>150467983
I once did a Marvel reimagining.
I decided to lean more into the "Folklore" vibe with GG

>>150468411
do you think I care about your fucking fanfiction? Do you think this is your fucking personal blog or something?

Alright, it is:
tell me everything about your Marvel reimagining and make it snappy

>>150468389
>hey there buddy chum pal friend buddy pal chum bud friend fella bruther amigo pal buddy friend chummy chum chum pal i don't mean to be rude my friend pal home slice bread slice dawg but i gotta warn ya if u take one more diddly darn step right there im going to have to diddly darn break ur back and wowza wouldn't that be a crummy juncture, huh? do you want that? do you wish upon yourself to come into physical experience with a crummy juncture? because friend buddy chum friend chum pally pal chum friend if you keep this up well then gosh diddly darn i just might have to get not so friendly with u my friendly friend friend pal friend buddy chum pally friend chum buddy

>>150468443
No words needed

It's been a year and, honestly, I still think
>BIGGER BATMAN
is absolutely retarded. He still looks clunky and like a moron. He still makes 0 sense. The new cowl/cape armour is actually really cool, but the retarded bulkiness just ruins it. Batman works best when he's sly and able to move. Making him a giant and then making everyone else an even bigger giant is retarded. And honestly it just clashes with the genre too much. Horror's all about tight spaces and scary monsters, when the MC is a monstrosity, then it all looks ridiculous. The same costume on a better frame looks vastly better.

I hope he does upgrade his look though, at some point. It's become a boring look now as it looks incomplete.

>>150468696
He'll probably get a full mask/helmet thing to match what the Absolute versions of WW and Supes have

What are the chance that Hal become obsidian, since he is Tomar Qward?

I feel like the novelty on this book is about to wear off. It's not really a "Batman" comic, it's some guy with a hammer fighting monsters.

All this talk has kinda convinced me to read Absolute Batman, the description of all of it reminds me a bit of Batman Holy Terror or a Hunter the Vigil tabletop campaign where shit is just insanely out of the average person's league and you're still expected to beat it.
Are the other Absolute runs good? I've not touched anything but mainline and the occasional one shot for fucking years

>>150469265
Absolute Wonder Woman is entertaining.

>>150468411
I discussed my own reimagining/reboot of ASM called Spider-Man: Minus One in the past
It's meant to be like an anti-One-More-Day where Aunt May is dead before Peter ever puts on the mask, instead he fathers Mayday earlier in life
GG in mine leans into the "angel of death" angle, believing his targets and victims are delinquents and sinners who need to be cleansed from existence

>>150468660
Is your version of Black Panther set in Apartheid-era South Africa?

>>150468660
OK the Deadpool and Blade i can get behind

>>150464314
Nope, he threated to report my friend's actions to his parents as if he was a small child afraid to be grounded. Jokes on him, my friend was 20 at the time, still living with his parents and being grounded every other day.

>>150461622
It was created by her. She's one of the scientists working at Ark M, like Strange, Helfern, and Langstrom.

>>150469265
Absolute DC is a very rare golden nugget when it comes to DC comics. Yes.

>>150469073
Strange, I feel the opposite. When it started it was just
>Batman... but he's bigger and heckin relatable now
But the more it goes on the more it leans to horror and espionage stuff, so it's developing a specific identity. It's not classic Batman, but it's got character enough to be able to tell a story and justify its existence. People are only getting more hyped to see whatever new bullshit monster they'll turn the next Batman villain into. I don't see it winding down, I feel that it's only getting started. I'll grant you that Snyder is a retard and this could end up with another Death Metal and BatKek type of awfulness, but I wouldn't say that the novelty's wearing off just now.

Honestly, if the book had a little different political angle, this could've easily been 00s Ultimate Batman.
>emphasis on super soldiers and global conspiracies
>horror angle
>edgy gore
It's like they mashed up Resident Evil, Metal Gear, Spawn and the Darkness all in one book. It's attracting both newcomers and is also nostalgic to the older crowd.
>>150469265
Like I said above, if you like games like RE or MGS, and vibe with maximalist 90s characters such as Spawn and Darkness, you'll like ABatman. From the others, AbsMM is the best written and imaginative book. AWW is entertaining and doesn't really have any issues; if you like the vibes of dark fantasy and mythology you'll enjoy it. AbSuperman is utterly dreadful though. It's extremely slow and it's yet another Aaron story consisting of
>MY DAD AND GOD AND REPUBLICANS SUCK
and nothing else. It's the most milquetoast and utterly unimaginative thing you could possible imagine. Leave the politics and subtlety aside, it's just devoid of any interest as a piece of entertainment. The other two are utterly forgettable.

>>150469725
I love metal gear and resident evil so you sold me for sure. Hope Catwoman is fun in the run too.
Damn shame to hear Superman sucks though, guy seems to never catch a break in Elseworld stories

>>150469265
It's genuinely one of the dumbest fucking shit I've ever read in my life and I've read some retarded shit. It's also retarded in a way that's fascinating because there are these moments of genuine goodness like the Mr Freeze short arc with Marcos Martin on art. Also the book is hard carried by Dragotta dude seems to understand how dumb Snyder's writing is leans hard into it. This page is pretty much the page that everyone realized what it is.

absolute wonder woman is cool hot and straight and I'm aroused by her nose but im miffed that it doesnt reach the levels of despair like bats and supes. plays too much like a normal comic book, sure she doesnt have the amazons but she has a loving mom, gods looking over her, friends. she loses her arm but gets a new one, she even replaces her one in the fight with the giant monster BEFORE the fight ends, like what was the point? Underdog my ass. its got the dark fantasy aesthetic but not the dark fantasy storytelling. DC get better writers, I said my piece.

>>150469725
What about Absolute Flash and Green Lantern?

>>150469908
>plays too much like a normal comic book
I think that's it's strength same with Ult Black Panther. Both book's mainline counterparts have been so bad for so long just having a solid version even if it's an alt universe version is refreshing. I too am into Diana's strong Hellenic features

>>150469943
NTA but both are very slow burn
Flash is your standard teen hero story, almost everyone around the protagonist wants him dead or captured so he's mainly just been on the run and having teenage panic attacks. There is a lot of setup for future stuff going on with not much main plot happening each chapter so far, I think when all those gears actually start moving it'll be good but at the moment it's pretty dull imo.
Green Lantern is a bit more high concept, sci-fi with a slight horror edge in tone, the story is being told very slowly with a big exposition dump happening last issue. Again the concepts being thrown around are interesting but it's taking ages to get places.

>>150470073
I guess I feel misdirected and spoiled a bit, because I enjoy seeing heroes pushed to the brink like in the other absolute runs. When things are too convenient, when victory is always expected, the virtuous aspect is diminished. Anyone can play a hero when they have incredible power and sacrifices are immediately made redundant. Wonder Woman is a warrior but when does she ever lose anything? How can she be brave if she hasn't tasted loss?

>>150469041
Hal isn't Tomar, Jo is. Tomar is when you can access a part of the spectrum without the required emotional state. The Black Hand shit is apparently just a normal part of being a Black Lantern that you can eventually control.

>>150465595
The setup was interesting until she started figthing, then she became such a Mary Sue. Everybody loves her, she can fix all her problems with her magic bag and willpower, etc. Every issue is a bad script wrapped in nice art and a cool concept, but you can feel the smell of shit coming from the inside.

>>150449790
>>150450004
I'm dying from laughter at the idea Bruce is getting it as bad as hell is specifically because Darkseid is still salty about Bruce killing him

>>150470164
Man I like Al Ewing and I like the idea but goddamn I can't give a shit about Jo Mullen. Hell I can barely give a damn about any human GL beyond Hal, John, Guy and maybe Kyle

>>150470472
Darkseid being a salty little bitch is the most Darkseid thing in years, he isn't some stoic ruler, he always been an asshole with a toddler's sense of humour, just look at his entourage.

>>150450531
>>150450237
The Monks are waiting for him, also he's supposed to meet Diana in November maybe she gives him something

>>150468696
I disagreed with you until I got to the issue where his stats are revealed: 6'9 and 421 lbs. Like, that's stupid. On top of that, he's the same size as Croc, who was no match for a boxing match with BibibibiBobbidiBoop.

Look, there's no Heavyweight division where people are clocking in at over 400lbs.

>>150470496
>I can't give a shit about Jo Mullen
For me it's using the classic characters to make her appear bigger and better. That's a cardinal sin of any woke media, but even with that aside her character suck ass. People can complain all they want but when writting old white dudes they can represent all they want, but suddenly the character has black tits and a one-sided buzzcut and the whole energy is sucked out of the room.

absolute deadshot

>>150450399
Berserk and Metal Gear

>>150451592
I’m your father, Batman!

Mary sue stories are perverse because they miss one of storytelling's most valuable functions, which is providing a way to vicariously go through challenge and loss, guided by a mentor (the hero). Everyone will face loss and failure in their life, so when you see a hero make it through a harrowing journey and survive with a smile, you imagine that maybe you can too. It's a meaningfully beneficial thing to consume. On the other hand, a story that paints a world where all loss and tragedy can be wiped away with godlike power isn't inspiring or relatable, because how can anyone actually achieve this except with numbing substances or abandonment? I want to see batman see all his friends turn into freakish monsters and yet still somehow remain optimistic about a better future. I don't want to see them all get magically undone by magic. I want to see the ugliness reckoned with, not shoved under the rug.

>>150449396 (OP)
Always remember that Alfred is Ra’s al Ghul. So this is fair.

>>150470587
kek
>>150451592
>She's gonna be Bruce's mom, and it's gonna be brutal.
Spot on. It's gonna be picrel all over again. Snyder will double down every edgy shit he's ever done.

>>150451191
>>150451302
Darkseid was nice to hear because he understood there's nothing he could come up with for her worse than her existence in the main books

>>150470619
>Alfred is Ra’s al Ghul
Ra's is over in Absolute Superman

>>150451682
>and he punched Riddler in the brain until he developed autism
is this real

>>150452155
>wait a second... it's coming...
By Jove, what has Joker eaten this time?

>>150453038
>>150452065
>>150451325
>joker (through bane) is the reason for three of batman's classic villains in absolute batman
this shit sucks

>>150470639
>The Kryptonian
>I shall make your life miserable, you will remember everything you've lost and it will haunt you
>The Amazon
>I need not interfere, you're already suffering under Tom King. You have my sympathy
>The Bat,
>That motherfucker
>I will absolutely RUIN you

more joker wank, might as well bring in batkek

>>150470684
Rubber chicken.
Roasted in squirting flower water

>>150470712
>The fast one….
>Run, run, run, close to the edge of reality without escape
>The Lantern
>Be overwhelmed by your worst enemies. Have no allies
>The Martian
>Witness me

>>150450531
>Joker got to them first and killed them after learning their secrets

>>150468660
>Black Widow acting like a Kojima character
let him cook

>>150469265
>Are the other Absolute runs good?
In my opinion:
Martian Manhunter > Wonder Woman >>> Batman >>>>> Green Lantern > Superman > Flash

Flash has the potential to get better but it's mostly just a lot of introducing characters so far without a lot actually happening.

>>150470665
More or less.

>>150470842
That's so fucking stupid. He could've just gone crazy from watching the others get attacked.

>>150470712
>The Amazon
>I need not interfere, you're already suffering under Tom King. You have my sympathy

>>150470851
What is impressive is that after losing his eyes and getting a lobotomy he needs to remake his brain. It's like cutting both arms and legs of a man and you find him one week later wearing wooden prosthetics he made in his shed.

>>150470839
Except she is afro-brazilian now, presumably to size her ass up for Absolute Bruce's frame.

>>150459374
My only contact with Spawn is that one movie with Michael Jai White.
If I'm enjoying Absolute Batman do you have any Spawn comic to recommend that I can go in blind?

>>150470839
Kinda herd to tell at this point. We know she's got some kind of prehensile cyborg tail, so that's something new at least. Whether she has any other enhancements, and what her personality and motives are, we know next to nothing about so far.

>>150471027
Just start reading Spawn from the very beginning and stop reading when it stops being fun. It's very 90s but not in a bad way (IMO), and the early arcs are a lot of fun, but it kinda crawls up its own ass after a while.