>>150921110
Real talk anon. First, you should talk to a therapist, I'm just some guy on the internet who isn't educated on human brain stuff and is not completely over their own self loathing, let along knowledgeable about yours. But I understand a general principle is that literally all of us have reasons to hate ourselves, but healthy minded people don't give that focus, they give what they want or need to do focus.
That's not always great, because often you want ice cream and do not do what you needed to do, wash the dishes, but the important thing is just go "oh, I still need to do dishes" not "you stupid motherfucker the dishes are still dirty, I'm a dumb fuck that can't do basic shit." Just get on with life, even if you still don't do the dishes, you move on to whatever else without the self loathing. And it's just like building or tearing down any other habit, every time you acknowledge a thing without specifically hating yourself for it is a victory, and it lessens in frequency and impact over time.
Relationship stuff is broadly the same but you have other peoples headspaces to worry about there, and it's more about understanding that they just aren't thinking about you nearly as much or as in depth as you are. And even when they do, and lie to say that they weren't bothered that you were late or whatever, they're telling that lie because that's what they want reality to be, and you just gotta let it be real.
And, of course, it really fucking helps if you can identify something worthy that you're doing, in the same way money helps you not be depressed that you can't make rent, and that's another habit too. Both identify worth in your day to day and do something worthy, no matter the degree of worth. Even the dumb things that you do to avoid doing something can still be meaningful. Give likes to videos despite the algorithm watching, whatever. Or do the fucking dishes. I'm bad at dishes.
