How are you holding up Anon? Anything to drink?

>wake up on a beautiful Sunday
>miserable because I have to live let another day, will do nothing anyway
It’s going well

Boohoo for all of you

Orthobro here, I don't know if you remember me from early March, i was ranting about how i met this 30 year old woman at the Church and we dated for a while. Well, we broke up 2 months ago and went no contact since and even though i was busy with work and some other stuff i managed to control it well. What i didn't do is go to the Church i met her in the last two months and i finally went there today for Sunday liturgy, when i got in I got that crazy nostalgia and everything reminded me of her. Meeting her there, going there to receive communion, her holding my hand you name it. The affection she gave was out of this world and she was always near me while being obedient and never letting me go, I was tough until now but today that I was also off from work it really hit like a brick, even the church feeling didn't feel the same. Even the priest asked me how me and her are doing. When i told him we broke up he told me, 'We move on'.

Being alone in the summer is crazy, we were planning on getting married but God had other plans. The next guy is cucking me hard btw because i literally teached her how to be a woman. It's over

>>76317738 (OP)
Nah. Been drinking and smoking hard these past 2 weeks. Looking for a job and kinda hit burn out so I decided to go full NEET-mode and it has been fun.

>>76317738 (OP)
I’m a wreck
Good things: my 160k€ portfolio yielded me 10k since this year
I’m escorting in a 5 star hotel in corfu
I’m looking good maintaining elite strength
Passed a test and got enrolled in uni
Finished a breakcore song

Bad
Jobless
Depressed
Lonely
Miss so fucking much the goth receptionist of the gym i’ve worked in as a pt
Got her number but she already has a boyfriend but still i wanna be part of her world
I’ve sacrificed my youth for money and now my mind has regressed into that of a 14 year old boy who want to dress as a metalhead and go moshing for days finding a girlfriend in the scene.

I miss her so much i’m just happy being her friend

>>76317858
Lucky her i wouldve loved to take your bwc too

i hate summer with every fibre of my being

currently cutting and had to turn down 4 days to 3 days lifting
less sets and less weight

fuck summer
fuck that shit so hard

>>76317858
>I’ve sacrificed my youth for money and now my mind has regressed into that of a 14 year old boy who want to dress as a metalhead and go moshing for days finding a girlfriend in the scene.
Jesus fuck, that hits me so hard right now.

>>76317889
Even if she was a 10/10 for me it was never about sex. I finally found a girl with style who we could share passions. I miss the talking we did during break.
Even without sex i would like to still be her friend. She found 3 golden circle tickets for me and my friends for a bring me the horizon concert 2 days prior without price increases. She helped and cared about me during my usual 16hours shifts.
I miss her so much it’s driving me insane. I’m in a literal 5 star hotel paradise right now but i can only think about her.
Please tell me it will pass

Any 30s ITT?

>>76317997
>I miss her so much it’s driving me insane
Seems like my bpd ex, no matter what I do I can't get past her because of how high energy she was, she made me feel alive every moment, I only cared about her and deep inside after 3 years of breaking up... I still do.

>>76318014
NTA but bpd girls really do spin your head round eh

>>76318009
Yes. I hope I die every day

>>76318047
That bad

Back to the gym for a month now and for some reason i'm grumpy a lot. Like i don't have my anger under full control. i havn't lashed out to anyone yet, but a feeling of unease is always there.

>>76317858
>>76317913
I want an alt gf so fucking bad bros. Got rejected by one, got over it nbd but everytime I hear her voice and how soft spoken and cute she looks the feelings come back.
>>76318009
Turned 30 last month

>Lost job
>Lost GF
>No Money
>A tick gave me hyperflu 3000
>I love the summer

>>76318014
Damn. She wasn’t even my gf and i miss her so much.
Why are we attracted to what will inevitably hurt us? Is that just human condition or a sense of sentimental masochism?
If just her absence (we are still friends) hurts me so much I don’t know what you are even felling. But if i may ask is the pain worth it? To have at least lived a life full of those emotions, even the negative ones

My view right now

I hung out with my friends who I don't get to see often last night. I had a lot of fun. I'm already a bit nostalgic about returning back to town and having to work tomorrow. I don't want a lazy life but I wish I had more time to spend with my friends.

>>76318112
>Damn. She wasn’t even my gf and i miss her so much.
>Why are we attracted to what will inevitably hurt us?
It's dopamine, you have that nice view but it doesn't match the energy that she gave you, she was your drug, she made your days, you were complete with her, her validation, her caring about your shifts, her being there, her smilling at you, her telling you her problems and relying on you, that view can't give you those feels, the view would be an addition if she was there with you right now.

>But if i may ask is the pain worth it?
It's not worth it, my life is a living her right now, the low is as bad on how good the high was. I had 2 gf's after her and she would send me messages that I told her we are getting married and that I should I drop the other girl. She also found me two weeks ago on my nightwalk with her friend and she wanted me to get in the car for a ride (her friend was riding) she called me the next day and I didn't answer, i pussied out because i'm scared of her, i can't describe you my pain.

>>76318034
BPDs will take your greatest insecurities and fears and use them against you. My BPD ex made me think about shit I hadn't thought of/thought I was over for years because they could tell a tiny bit of it still existed in me.

>>76318166
>BPDs will take your greatest insecurities and fears and use them against you.

True af, i took the leanpill in 2020 and her friend said that i'm a dyel and she snitched just to make me insecure, she was also telling that her brothers friends have better physique than me (despite me mogging them). On other occasions she would make fun of my sex drive and after 2 months I started bulking and broke up with her, when we got back together in the summer (4 months later or so) my sex drive was out of this world (because of the bulk) and I fucked the living shit out her and she still thinks about me, I mindfucked her so much out of revenge, i made her fly out of sweden to come and find me for my birthday and a week later when she got back I blocked her everywhere and she was sending me emails for 3 months straight. On other occasions she would break into my house (happened 6 times). I changed locks then years passed (this was in 2022) now we are on good terms, but a few days ago she asked me if i still lift lmao. I was getting mad (you's) in 2022 when this was happening, now i'm just volceling until a good girl appears, don't mess with BPD

>>76318166
yeah i know, i had my own encounter with a bpd girl, it even went so far that i was mimicing her i.e. i felt untouchable like the king of the world
the sex was out of this world
but oh boy was she either super happy or deeply depressed and started talking to me about how she almost cut herself after years again
then the "i dont like this and that about you" started and i broke down crying in bed before work
literally took a year of researching bpd to get my head straight and tell myself it's not me it's her

Afternoon, barman. Glenlivet 12 year, double, neat, pl0x.
>met an adorable sweet kind goth gf on Duo and been talking with her every day
>studying hard for med school, vyvanse has helped a lot
>lifts going up, arms getting bigger, generally feeling less fat and gay and bloated, currently 14% bf
>uninstalled all my addictive toxic vidya and replaced them with hobbying and reading
Overall feeling very zen and in control going into the new school year.
>>76318100
I was at the low point of my life about 6 months ago. This too shall pass. Take heart, anon.

Turned 34 this year, lifting has been a lot better

But man when everyone around you is getting kids, married etc and you're the only one still single for years it takes a mental toll on you

>>76318198
>when your bpd ex had cut marks, gets so inside your head, and then breaks up with you that you say, "let's try this cutting thing. maybe there's something to it."
There was not. People who have a history of it other than a 1 time thing are seriously fucked in the head.

Well I turned my life around, 32, sober, dropped 180lbs but now I am a KHV with loose skin so It all feels a bit fucking over! Going to move to the midwest or Alaska one day and just fuck off I guess. NA beer for me please bartender

>>76318198
>literally took a year of researching bpd to get my head straight and tell myself it's not me it's her
What did you learn that helped?

>>76318221
>KHV
>32
How does this happen, did you stay in the house?

>>76318219
yeah figures
>>76318222
the signs to lookout for
the way why they do what they do
how bpd people express themselves
it all fit like a glove when i read the reactions honestly

>>76318229
unending depression + booze is a fun combo anon

>>76317753

Trust in God. All will be right in the end. Continue progress on yourself. Do silent prayer. Try to sit still, do not think even one word or image for 15 minutes each day. Drive in silence, no radio. Use the Jesus prayer.

>>76317858
call her up and warn her that if she doesn't break up with her bf then you will just kill him and take her anyway.

>>76317858
how do i filter this guys posts?

I'm a wreck.

My whole life got flipped upside down two weeks ago. Quit my job to work on a project, worked on it for 3 months, whole thing exploded. Good friend I worked on the project with was being dishonest with me, not maliciously I don't think, but I can't trust him anymore. Now I'm literally at square one. No job, no pursuit, no responsibility, literally nothing going on. Was living with the friend I was working on project with, now just living back in my parents house.

Doing a water fast today and did an 11 mile bikeride. I got fat so I have to lose like 50 pounds. don't even know what to do with my life except get /fit/. I miss my friend and I'm totally lost,

>>76318273
I will stop don’t worry.
I can give you training advices if you wanna.

>>76318240
>Trust in God
Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."

Τhanks anon

Bartender, can i get a warm diet coke please?
34 yo, i'm turning my life around, lost my 20's to depression and neetdom, still a virgin, but i don't give up. One day i just woke up screaming "i can't live like that anymore". Joined a boxing gym, lost a shitload of weight, got in shape (the cons are that i get hit in the head repeatedly twice a week). I looked in the mirror today and didn't recognise the man looking back at me. Feels like in my 20's which i never had. NO ONE knows that i'm an old fuck unless i say i am so i just don't say my age, i think God just gave me another chance and i'm sure as shit not going to waste it.
I still i still can't come out of my shell, talking to random people (especially young and attractive women) is still a challenge i can't deal with. I just go to concerts and festivals and walk around feeling like i'm a starving beggar looking through the window at people inside a restaraunt enjoying their meal and having fun. People keep telling me to accept myself but it's fucking hard. Gonna go to a goth rave next week and try my hardest to have fun regardless if i talk to anyone or not, i'm going to kill the dancefloor.

>>76317738 (OP)
I’m really fucking pissed off and at my wits end
>4 months ago move into apartment
It’s owned by MIL, sister and her husband have lived there for like 8 years they married and bought their first place so I was next in line to move in. I got a deal on rent. Since I’m family as written in the contracts I didn’t need to submit an application.
>yesterday hear all kinds of banging assume it’s neighbors all pissy at someone for making noise think nothing of it continue playing vidya because it’s my day off
>go to start cleaning bathroom is flooded and it goes all the way to kitchen
>panic call landlord (MIL) clean everything up disinfect my floors it immediately floods again
It’s coming from the sink.
>meet up with MIL (she has experience with this stuff) and we try to figure it out, talk to my friend who has plumbing experience we’re very sure it’s the main and not my unit
>shut off valve to sink, call it a night, pick her up early AM to go to Home Depot and get a new P trap and some other supplies
>meet with HOA manager/president
This is why I’m pissed. First thing he says is that my BIL hasn’t been paying the association fee. The set up is he will inherit this condo so I’m paying him rent he’s paying the association fee with my payment and handling everything for his mom. Either I stay in it and get a good deal for life or if I move he will rent it to someone else for passive income. He 100% has been paying the fee. He tried to make my MIL sweet old lady pay a second fee. We caught him in his BS and he took it back.
1/2

>>76318348
We tell him it’s the main. THEN he says all in the same breath he doesn’t know jackshit nothin about plumbing but we’re wrong it’s our fault, it’s just my unit, and my MIL is responsible for all repairs and costs. Then he claims a P trap is a major fix and he doesn’t want us changing it because we will break other shit. Then later on the phone he says he’s scheduling a plumber to fix it, that my MIL has to pay for it all, and that he will come in a week. A FUCKING WEEK WITH A FLOODING APARTMENT ANY TIME ANOTHER UNIT USES WATER. He also said any water damage to my unit or other units has to be paid for by my MIL.
The issue is with the main. It has nothing to do with my unit. This fuckhead piece of maggot shit prick tried to say the sink and my toilet are interconnected, not at the main he tried to say they have pipes running back and forth to each other. The fuck does he think, I take a piss then wash my hands with my own piss?
We were able to witness multiple times how we would hear another unit use water and then it would back up through my sink. I’ve had this happen in old houses, I had and ex plumber friend say 99% chance it’s the main and has nothing to do with anything I did, my father who has experienced this multiple times says it’s the main, I even had the few actually competent Home Depot employees say it’s probably the main.
Every time another unit flushes, showers, etc I get flooded and this faggot wants me to wait a week. I can’t get a plumber out to fix it because this fucking greedy coward has to give him access to the main, and that would prove it’s a building issue which means it has to come out of the association. Wtf is the point of an HOA if it’s not doing its job?

>>76318348
>>76318359
3/3
BIL is pissed, I’m pissed, MIL is concerned (she’s a sweet old lady).
At one point this fuckface says I have to submit an application to continue living here because he decided in laws don’t count. He wants his $50 fee. But I’m also worried he’s just gonna use that to have me kicked out. I’m heated. I’ve been repairing the shit I know how to fix for the last 4 months, I make no noise I don’t bother anyone my rent is always paid on time meanwhile there’s multiple people smoking pot in their units, blasting music, someone broke the communal laundry and left it a fucking mess.
We changed the P trap anyways because fuck this corrupt shmuck and so far no issues, but I can tell there’s water in the P trap and I may wake up to a small flood again.


I’m worried and pissed off. I got the next week off paid from work and this is the bullshit I have to deal with. This evil cuckatron720 should have on the spot had a plumber come out, paid for it out of the association (you know because that’s his fucking job and that’s why an HOA exists) and had this fixed hours ago. He’s turning a small but extremely impactful issue into a much bigger deal, trying to fuck my MIL over, and making me be the one to suffer for it.

>>76318229
im a 33 year old khv
i know its unbelievable for normal people to comprehend how its possible but its actually not that crazy to happen. since guys pretty much always have to initiate everything with women and its very rare for a woman to actually pursue the guy, if youre a guy and dont really initiate or engage with women, its very easy to end up as a virgin late in life. and also
>did you just stay in the house
yeah, thats another way to end up like this. if you spend a lot of your free time in your house or alone, its not difficult at all to end up like this

those two things are the exact reason why this happened to me. being socially avoidant/autistic/shy/whatever you want to call it, i havent had many friends or social experiences in my life, and without those, you dont meet women. and since ive never really had many friends or any self-estem ever, ive never asked a girl out, or been on a date, or felt that i should even try flirting with or showing interest in girls.

yes, its a sad, pathetic, miserable existence

>>76318089
I made a dark techno/witch house album during my insomniac nights full of moonlight called ACLI
i got to know lots of alt girls playing guitar and going to concerts, also aving a goth friend helps.
Like anything being social and proactive helps. Try get i to tattooing, music or even fashion. Alt girls are rare but if you search in underground venues you can find them. Godspeed anon, i’m searching for an alt gf too

>start music production as a hobby 4ish years ago
>still haven't released a track on streamables besides soundcloud

ugh

>>76317858
>>76317997
>she has a boyfriend
>still got her number
>has a body like that
Lad I'd say you're in. You should go hang out with her more, best case scenario she breaks up with him for you and worst case scenario your morals about cucking a man are tested.

>>76317738 (OP)
Vodka Martini please, half a liter of olive juice in it

>new job working on cars so big ass forearms coming plus a good check
>college starts back up soon
>finally getting skinny enough to be okay with my body
>getting slightly better at talking to people/going out

My only issue is my girlfriend. She’s disrespectful and honestly just stupid. I love her a lot but I don’t think I can spend any more than a week longer with her without snapping. I think I’m at least averagely attractive, I’m definitely a good boyfriend, and I have the chance to meet plenty of women even though I can’t talk to them for shit. But all my friends and almost my entire social life is a result of her. It’ll already hurt me to leave her even with how bad she is, but then I won’t have anyone else left either. I used to just work and sit alone in my house all day everyday, and I don’t want to go back to that cause I know I’ll just kms. What do?

Also how do I fill my life? Until college starts I feel like I have nothing to do

well lets see. yesterday was a beautiful saturday and of course i had nothing to do. so in the middle of the day i biked to the regional park in my town with a lake, biked around the loop, and all i saw were all the happy people out with their friends and families. people barbecuing, people fishing, people hiking, all enjoying the day with their friends and loved ones. so instead of being happy i was out in the sunshine and fresh air exercising, i just felt lonely and miserable anyway being reminded of how happy and normal and not-alone everyone else is

so today is sunday, another beautful day, another day with no plans. i probably dont want to subject myself to that again. so ill probably just sit in the house alone and miserable here too. the fact that i continue to live and dont get a heart attack, brain aneursym, the courage to kill myself, get a terminal illness, or any other multitude of ways there are to die that good people suffer every day is proof there is no god.

>>76317738 (OP)
This week is my last chance to fix my life on my own. If I don't make it, I'm going to a shrink and getting fucking meds prescribed. Wish me luck.

>>76318404
Hei! I produce music too!
Gimme your soundcloud. Mine is mco945(if you can hear past pony stuff) i can help you

>>76317738 (OP)
I saw how fucking weak and sniveling you were under that posture and as time always proves, i'm vindicated in my belief. And just like that i've already cut you off. Fuck if i'll ever even fake being convivial with you again, let alone help. No more wasting energy and life and time on dead weight.

>>76318438
women are really good at building social networks. social capital is fickle thing though. one day you are king of the world and leader of your pack, the next 'nobody knows you when you're down and out.' to women, this social capital is the most valuable and important thing to them. then they hit the wall all their social capital disappears like a fart in the wind and they spend the rest of their lives fuming about it and trying to get it back.

social capital is expensive to build, expensive to maintain, and if you don't actually use it then it's pretty much worthless anyway.

>>76317738 (OP)
I'm a wreck, but I'm also in a sort of good place.

Quit my job to work on a project with a buddy, moved in with him across the world digital nomading. Worked on it for 3 months. Got fat. The whole thing exploded a couple weeks ago, had to move back home. Now I have no prospects, no job, no responsibilities, no women, I'm fatter than I've ever been, and I miss my friend.

But, also it's a sort of turning point. My whole life I've had some responsibility, some plan. Was school -> college -> job -> this, and now I'm totally free. I've got literally zero going on. Nothing good, nothing really bad.

I'm completely alone. It feels like it's just me and God out here. I have no idea what to do with my life. The only guiding principle is I'm fat now, so I'll lose weight and get /fit/.

I like penises but I want to marry a woman and have kids. I want to be normal but I'm afraid that I'm gay

>>76318507
Care to elaborate

>>76318582
Take this time serious to figure out what you want to do if you can afford to. I went down a spiral of binge drinking periods (like 3-7 days of vodka drinking) and feel that just now I'm getting an idea.

>>76318216
look on the bright side, at least you have people around you

Has anyone here quit smoking or vaping in any kind of form? It's been two months since I've stopped vaping dry herb and I still have excess mucus that I'm coughing up. Less than week one or two but still I feel like I'm recovering. It's not a deep color at least. How long did it take you to feel close to fully healed?

Kill myself before the work wanna kill me at first

trying to get a job is a depressive affair. I actually got a rejection email saying
>Hello, thank you for applying for our position as [job title] at [company name]. We're sorry but bla bla bla...
did any of you ever get that? A message where the recruiter person just copy pasted some message and didn't care to fill out the square bracket text?

i cant even put into words how insecure i am and it cripples every aspect of my life. everything i do, every thought i have, it all comes back to my insecurity. i dont think people would even be able to comprehend it

dont try to make friends because im insecure about not having friends
dont try to meet women because im insecure about being a pathetic virgin in my 30s
dont try to improve my pathetic job situation because im insecure about my terrible job history
dont really go to crowded gyms to work out because im insecure about how weak and emaciated i am
even things as basic as leaving the house, all i do is look around and see how everyone has friends or family theyre with and get insecure just existing around people

literally everything in my life, just insecure, insecure, insecure

>>76318229
imagine being a normie

Yep, 2 times this week.
Went berserk on them by the phone, had to send them application with all the bells and stuff and they are too lazy to even fill out prewriten email

>>76318588
Why don't you just not be gay? Like, I see hot girls that I would smash but it's a bad idea for myriad reasons, so I don't (try). You can feel an attraction to dicks and just fuck your wife and be happy. No one's gonna force you to take a cock up the ass if you don't want to... Besides rape. You get the idea.

>>76318785
You have to realize having friends, fucking girls, etc. etc. is not any deeper than the actual interaction you have with them. You don't have to be a super hero. You just have to go through the motions of a friend or a lover, and you can learn and practice these motions. It doesn't matter how depraved or horrible you are (or think you are) outside of those motions. Think of a cashier or a waitress. To do that job you just have to go through the motions, who or what you are when you go home is pretty much irrelevant.

You say hello, you say good morning. You ask how the day went. You come up with a joke and you say it. You make eye contact. You share a fact about yourself. You ask them to share a fact about themself. You listen nicely and are "supportive", ie, just nice and empathetic and caring when they tell you something sensitive. You eat ice cream together. Etc. Etc.

Just try and go through those motions. I guarantee you there are people as sad and depressed and depraved as you are with whom you will find camaraderie.

>>76317738 (OP)
I've had a great week, and I feel great. Hope this holds up.

>>76318588
Are actually gay, aka you see men on the street and you're sexually attracted to them, or have you fried your brain with drugs/4chan/roids and wank to trannies?

>>76317738 (OP)
Went to a strip club last week because I have never seen a naked woman at age 34. I went by myself because I have no friends and all of them were really nice to me, complimenting me, etc. I know they just wanted my money in the end, but it was so nice to feel wanted by women like somewhere there is a girl who would want to be with me.
I bought a gym membership yesterday and could only squat and ohp the bar. I felt like a loser, but I will keep going because I want to be strong and not have a double chin.
I am drinking a bud light atm with my steak dinner.

Moving out of the USA on Wednesday, leading company got told to fuck themselves and I will just take photos. Thankfully I don't have too much shit to Hussle but making sure everything works so I can access all my bank stuff overseas has been annoying. Going to enjoy a coconut in one hand, beer in the other, and my dick in someone

I hate myself. I don’t like anything about myself. My mistakes are destroying me and I can’t stop thinking about it. All the stuff I did wrong is eating me worst part is I’m responsible for it all. I ask god for forgiveness. Doing my best to repent and stay on the right path but sooner or later I’m knee deep back in sins. It’s an endless cycle. I barely talk with people anymore. My friends I only see once a month. I got introduced to a girl by my sister. Lovely beautiful woman on path to marriage. We were still in talking stage while I went on a trip and I had one night stand with a stranger. I haven’t told anyone but I broke up with her weeks later making up an excuse. I’m back on my drug binges. Wake up, go to work, come back and then do drugs in my room going crazy waking up next morning to go to work again. It bothers me so much to why I’m like this. Months of being sober,working hard living healthy doing my best to pursue my goals and dreams all in the drain so I can isolate myself in my room doing hard drugs that I don’t even enjoy or make me happy. The thrill I get when my mind is completely fucked, my heart giving me a funky feeling making me think I’m about to die. I like it. My mind is occupied with trying not to die in my room so I forget all my worries. Now sober since last binge was too extreme. Haha death is so scary

>>76318903
>I bought a gym membership yesterday and could only squat and ohp the bar. I felt like a loser, but I will keep going because I want to be strong and not have a double chin.
keep going and you'll be impressing everyone before you know it

I accidentally killed a fish today

>>76318903
youre just like me but a year older. i dont even have the desire to go to a strip club or escort or massage parlor or anything...

Long winded low quality story but hey gotta air this out.

> cutie ultra orthodox girl at work
> see her mirin'
> talk to her, see her visibly blush
> she's engaged
> ff 3 months later forget about her
> see her one day at office
> workstation few feet away
> coworker says she's really into me
> he (coworker) calls me over
> cutie added him on IG
> he shows me pics of their southern euro honeymoon
> he's a degenerate and can read women extremely well (he plays tennis with said girl sometimes)
> shows me picture of the "post sex selfie" of them
> he tells me "that's a woman who has never been fucked right"
> evenicantell.jpeg
> notice she doesn't stare at me like she used to
> ignore her
> ff a month
> she glances shyly, her feet point at me all the time, I even heard her sniff when I passed by (I wear Dior homme btw)

Fuck this girl playing childish games.
Honestly at a loss.
I have a gf of 6 months too but this girl is something else ..

Also her boyfriend is an ultra manlet (no offense), mid face and shit job. Jfc he lucked out being HS sweethearts.

>>76317858
Height and weight now.

watching east asian men fuck white girls in porn is a good feeling.

>>76319083
Thank you. I will keep going.

>>76319108
Don't dwell on it too much.

>>76319113
I would say just go. They don't know you are a virgin. Its nice to see a woman smile at you, feel how soft they are, how their hair smells and how much bigger you are compared to them. Its an easy way to get natural dopamine and serotonin, but expensive.

>>76319108
If it makes you feel better I’ve killed hundreds of fish. Some for food, some as wasted bait, some were pets I didn’t care for properly a few were me being young and stupid doing what I thought was funny like tying one to a ladies car. Fish are super easy to kill. You can kill a fish by its temperature being off by a few degrees. The fact you feel bad reflects far more on your character than the action you feel bad about. And I’m as unbiased as one could be so I’m right, I don’t care if a fish dies unless it’s some seasonal or protected sports fish, and I think being sad over a fish while sweet is pretty fuckin gay. So I have no reason to lie to you. You have a good heart.

>>76317738 (OP)
Feeling good today, been going in the floatation tank
I'll have a cider to cool off, please

>>76318307
canarias?

>>76318903
I'm hoping you aren't Indian but there is hope regardless. It's called the Philippines.

>>76319384
I briefly had an LTR with a sea monkey a long time ago. Never again.

Visited my friend and got to see his baby for the first time. Wish I had a wife but don't know where to start. Tried getting back on dating apps but those are just aids. Haven't met a girl that's interested be in a minute.

I'm almost 30 in a wagie job (security guard in a warehouse; upskilling to get into a new career) and suspect I have a bad reputation at my workplace, how would I go about changing it? Assume I'm a typical KHV with no charisma who everyone thinks is creepy for speaking low and mumbling, and gets cussed at for screening people as they leave the building. Most women in the building ignore me when I try to talk or say hello, or give me attitude when I ask to check their stuff at the x-ray machine. People get annoyed that I check them, but not the person behind them (it's a lot of people during breaks) or that I'm a hypocrite. Please help

>>76320118
Obviously people are not gonna like it when someone effectively accuses them of theft, but that's part of your shitty job.

Socialize outside of work, and stop caring about your "reputation" at work. Your job is to be annoying and intrusive.

>>76319538
I'm in a similar boat.
I've optimized my diet and exercise so my libido is healthy.
Problem is, I don't wanna jerk off and at present, I don't have a female.

24 and just graduated uni. I feel like I've never really been respected by my peers, either in highschool or college because of my energetic personality. I remember the way that people I thought were my friends talked to me and how they never seemed to be that interested in anything I had to say. Maybe this is just random melancholy from looking back on my life after a big milestone, but I find myself more desprate to be proficient in some skill to earn the respect I think I lacked.

>>76319163
176-179cm. Depend on the time of day
78-80kg
>>76319379
Corfù greece. I’m accompanying in a 5 star resort

In the club got them bottles on replay. Tryna break a record like a DJ. That's 150 bottles in one night. I gave that bitch some act right.

>>76318888
Holy quads, you gonna have a great year anon.

>>76320204
>Corfù greece
done anything cool? other than post in the /bar/?
I always daydreams of traveling but then I realize I would probably stay in my hotel room

>>76319163
“this girl is something else” pls explain? what is it about her

>>76321226
Her face and demeanor are extremely appealing to me.
All I've known is easy, bimbo-maxxed, gym-addicted girls. Even in my workplace they all dress the same, pound of makeup on, tight clothes, etc.
This girl looks like (kid you not) a not-so-full-lipped Bellucci. Like picked straight out of the Italian countryside. So healthy looking - the skin, the refined roman nose, the mass of pitch dark hair, the defined back (she's a swimmer like I am).
She dresses so unassumingly as well.. even in a loose shirt one can discern the full small breasts, the line of her muscular thighs in those wide jeans..

She's being wasted in a man that cannot provide for her as she deserves and for the first time in my life im envious of another man.

might have to kill myself

Words can’t express how much I hate being alive

>>76317738 (OP)
i'm making a married 8.5/10 with bpd drive 10 hours to me to fuck. ive never had sex or kissed. she's obsessed with me. any tips for my first time gents other than wrapping it

>>76321875
This will end well.
Keep us posted srs.

>>76322232
yeah its a pretty bad idea but i rly don't want to be a kv when i'm 30

>>76317738 (OP)
I was walking the dog the other day and a jewish girl was walking her two. She was around 22 and our dogs started playing and we talked a little bit and i got her instagram. This happened 5 days ago. Today she text me on IG asking me if i wanna join for the walk. I rejected her because i'm christian and she doesn't believe in God. I told her let's arrange another time. Based or cringe?

>>76322261
does she have big milkers

>>76322261
>i'm christian and she doesn't believe in God
I thought Jewish people didn't believe in Jesus the Messiah, but still believe in God?

>>76322278
She seems ran through from her instagram posts, her body is VERY hot but mid face, she gives bpd vibes aswell

>>76322361
She told me she wasn’t baptized

>>76322371
22 yr old fuck toy jew sounds pretty good idk u might be gay

>>76322391
Nah i'm not gay, i just want a faithful wife

>>76322391
She is actually 25 btw

>>76322443
She wasn't going to be your wife anon, she might have been your tonight. But either way you should see interactions with all women as practice for when you meet the right women.

>>76323434
>she might have been your tonight
Do you think I still have a chance if i call her in a few days?

>>76317738 (OP)
Im unattractive Im tired im thinking of roiding and injecting my junk with hgh to make it grow huge

>>76320840
No, just luxury daycare.
Talked about training programs to some of the animation staff and being told multiple times that i look like an actor.
It’s just glorified boredom and I can’t chose what to do
At least the food is top tier

>>76317738 (OP)
>have girl that I really wanna see and who really wants to see me, she said she would buy a plane ticket and fly to me
>no time because of job
>get a paid week off
>would rather spend it laying around and catching up on chores and errands
Literally pussy on a silver platter. I may get on trt, I’m approaching that age anyway

Just had a major surgery. Life is looking like it will turn around. Too many wasted years. How do I pick up the pieces when I'm about to turn 32?

>>76325309
Start building slowly anon, good luck. What surgery?

>>76325383
Two-level lumbar fusion. I have an autoimmune condition as well that's been brought under control to a degree with medication.

I used to work out, cook, take college classes after work. For years now I've just barely made it through work before lying in bed the rest of the day doomscrolling. I stopped my education, lost my girlfriend, my physique atrophied and the years of pain and stress have dug circles under my eyes. I still need two more surgeries on my elbows and one wrist because of nerve compression. It's a tragedy.

>>76325519
I believe in you. Keep going.
Also consider picking up swimming - low impact and wholesome.

>>76317738 (OP)
I’m thinking about getting on TRT. I’m 30 now. I had the realization yesterday I’m not the same as I was 10 years ago, when I could drink get very little sleep go hit a PR in the gym the next morning so long as my diet was moderately in order.
Now I can prioritize sleep, have my diet perfect, not touch any sort of drugs or alcohol and I’m lucky to wake up with morning wood I’m always tired and I just seem to burn my wheels with fitness. A friend recommended a newer place nearby that’s owned and run by an ex Mr O competitor, so it wouldn’t be any of that “oh you’re 30 with 250 total and near 0 free test well that means you’re in range so you’re fine haha.” shit that happens. He said they start you on a low dose and work your way up until they get you dialed in and find your optimal range/dosage. He was telling me this morning that it changed his entire life.

>>76324253
all your morals go right out the window when you realize you coulda gotten easy pussy hahaha

>>76322371
nigga you asked for her instagram what are you whining for like a victim

my casual fwb asked me for money again, no girl has done this to me before. sure what to think. shes 21 im 35 btw. being fit and having a big dick made sex and fwb so easy. is it because I'm getting old?

>>76326008
21 year old whore putting you through a mid life crisis. just pick up a younger one

>>76326025
kek. thats actually a good idea.

>>76325787
The thing with TRT is that you have to think of it as a second chance at youth. Take care of your body, get your sleep, eat healthy, stretch on your days off, etc. In maybe 3 years you can have those days in your 20s where no sleep doesn't bother your energy levels. This will also affect you mentally as well in a similar fashion

>>76325984
Yeah it's called temptation

I think i'm going insane. Like literally coo coo crazy with delusions, scenarios made up in my mind and shit. I'm angry all the time, horny and lonely. Travis Bickle tier.
>living in a shitty apartment
>some faggot and his girl are really really loud until like 1 am lately
>sunday night, i want to go to sleep early, these absolute NIGGERS are having a house party until 1 am, i her a women giggle, i get so angry i can't sleep so i just do pushups until i'm exhausted, pass out at 4 am
>i wake up at 5 am
>think it's an old fat guy next door (i had some beef with him but we usually don't interact at all) and his wife
>it keeps happening
>i'm completely fucked out of my mind with sleep deprivation, massive doses of caffeine, 1k calorie deficit and daily exhausting exercise
>mad as fuck, thinking how i will just beat him up next time i see him
>i'm running on hate like it's gasoline
>actually see him on a street
>he walks towards me
>only violence on my mind
>don't just push him with my shoulder, fucking crash into him
>turn around to punch him
>he INSTANTLY punches me in a jaw
>i cross him right in the face
>we're both still standing
>yell FUCKING FAGGOT WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU SO LOUD AT 1 FUCKING AM I'M GOING INSANE I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU
>...dude, are you joking? I go to sleep at 8 PM
>no fucking way dude you're and your wife are laughing until 1 AM I CAN FUCKING HEAR YOU
>dude my wife has left me 3 months ago
>oh shit.jpg
>you're shitting me, your apartment is right next to my living room, i can hear you talk all the time
>well it wasn't me, i mean you could just talk to me instead of trying to start a fight like a fucking retard.
>oh shit yeah you're right sorry i didn't think about it haha
>we shake hands and leave

>>76326153
The phrase "Deliver us from evil" is the final petition in the Lord's Prayer, found in Matthew 6:13. It expresses a plea for protection from temptation and the forces of evil. It is often understood as a request for God's help in resisting sin and overcoming the influence of the "evil one" or a Jewish woman

>>76326084
>>76326084
That’s what I’m hoping for. I need to think about it. It’s not something where I’d hope to just pin and then put no effort into the rest of my life like the rest is gonna do all the work. If I can hit 35 and be like 210 lean (6’2”) and feel as close as possible to how I did at 18-21 I would be pretty happy. It’s not that I plan to lose sleep, it’s that I want to feel as good as I should by doing all the right things. Not just less shitty than if I was slamming pizzas jerking off 10x a day never sleeping and not exercising.
>>76326159
I’m having similar issues but I’m not quite there where you are. One of my neighbors called me a retard, not to my face because he’s half my size and I could split him open with my dick if I really wanted to and all he’d be able to do is beg for help, but he said it outside my window “everyone quiet we gotta pass the retard!”
I’m just gonna continue my pursuits to be my best self, maybe fuck his gf (they’re both in their early 20s spoiled rotten by rich parents who finance his entire life type of sheltered prick who’s never been hit). All it takes is me looking my best, being kind in passing, and then her and him having a bad fight. She’s just some whore anyways. They’ve clearly talked about me at some point. But I digress, these are the writings of a crazy man at his wits end thinking this far in advance.

>>76326187
>The phrase "Deliver us from evil"
I say that prayer at least 3 times a day and even then i'm still tempted. It's really hard, also the devil plays crazy tricks. I woke up from a nap dreaming about my orthodox ex i was about to marry a few months ago and i got angry and said to God 'I'll let you send my future wife and I'll leave all my confidence to you' (proverbs 3:5 'Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.”) then a few hours later that jewish woman sends me a message. But i'm tempted everyday

>>76326239
i declined fornicating with a woman that lived with her boyfriend although tempting and soon after was sent a lovely marriage seeking woman. do not fail for you are being tested for something greater

>>76326281
Based!

I find it entertaining that the most damaging thing a woman can do to a man is reject them. It costs absolutely nothing but it's basically the equivalent of a coronary scar, it never heals or anything. Women should normalize torturing men until they get fed up and start making war.

How can I unfuck my life?
>almost 30
>took more time to complete my bachelor's because of acting like a whiny alcoholic
>fucked u a few corporate roles out of college
>work odd jobs, now a security guard where people ignore me or out disrespect and get attitude with me
>signed up for an electrical trade program, 3 months long and free, could also sign up for the electrical union
>have a fleeting interest in sports analytics
>Dad asks what I want to do in life and what my plans are
>instead of talking about what interests me or setting goals, I just ruminate about how I've failed so much already
>Instead of getting angry like he used to, he just gets quiet, says "okay", and turns back to his computer
>pic actually somewhat related

>>76317997
>I’m in a literal 5 star hotel paradise right now but i can only think about her.
literally just message her this and she will fall in love with you

>>76326504
Your parents aren’t perfect. You’ve got plenty of time to figure things out. Ultimately whatever your mistakes in the past, it’s done. Let it go, you can still make it.

Boys my cat died at 17. I knew she was in pain, I just thought it was her arthritis and we got her a shot that takes a month to kick in.

So I'd hold her and tell her it's just another few weeks, she'll be back running around again. Kidney failure. Gone. I wrote her a poem in the hospital, but reading it back now is hard.

It's just a desperate little note from a scared kid who's psychologically still begging his dad not to leave.

Lifting for you tonight, puss. Thank you for being with me my whole adult life.

picrel, 2 days before the end I was visiting her in the hospital trying to feed her with a syringe to give her some chance of recovery. It didn't work but I don't regret trying. She loved the sun.

Crank out a few chest flys for me bros, my heart has doms

>>76326893
Just get another one. They hand them out for free.

>>76326897
This one was free, too. how they get you is that about 6 years in you realise youve gotten kind of fond of them. It's a trap, just keep walking.

>>76326903
>just keep walking
No, you just get another one. Cats only live a decade or two at the most, so that's about 3-5ish cats throughout a human lifespan.

>>76326912
Nah, not for me, I'm done caring about things

>>76326893
Sorry to hear that friend…it‘s an off day for me but I‘ll plank a bit and give my kitty lots of love for you and yours. You‘ll see her again.

>>76326932
Thanks bro. She scratched the vet on the way in, so I'll catch up with her in Valhalla

my grandmother is probably on her last legs and just got put in an assisted living facility.
I'm really scared of death so this is a really morbid reminder of the inevitability of everything
had a weird depressing dream about her being in the facility too. fuck man. I don't know if I'll be able to bear this shit when it happens to my parents. my parents are already almost 60 because they had me late.

>>76326239
>>76326281
I’ve rejected women and nothings come of it. I’ve slept with women and had great nights. I’ve slept with women and then gone through hell.
I’m lonely right now. I haven’t Thad sex in 3 years. I have a girl who wants to see me and idk if I want to. It seems chore like because I have to
>clean apartment more than usual
>buy some shit I recently tossed like new bathroom rug, some new clothes other than my usual sweats and undershirt, new shoes
>cialis because I refuse to ever fuck without it
>food to cook for two / be prepared to spend $150 for ubereats
And then I would have to pick her up from the airport and drop her off there the next day. I do care about her, but idk that it would ever work with her. I don’t fully trust her. In some regards I’m overthinking this but the core point I’m trying to make is idk if I’m rejecting her because I don’t think she’s the one, because I’m scared, or because I’m lazy and tired and not prepared. Maybe right now just isn’t the time to see her, maybe when things are more in order and I need to try not to force it. I shouldn’t feel like I have to run 1000 errands and get shit in order because I sat on doing them.

>>76321326
but isn’t she fucking your coworker

>>76326959
>I haven’t Thad sex in 3 years. I have a girl who wants to see me and idk if I want to. It seems chore like because I have to
3 years? I'm 6 months dry spell and I feel like my life is over and i'm an incel, i can't cope. I'm also in the same situation and i can assure you the inaction of fucking really crippled us, at least it did for me, the loss of connection with a woman is a very bad thing to happen to a man, and i'm thinking about the footwork aswell in order to fuck a that woman who wants me but i think our issues lie deeper, I think... we are depressed.

>>76326947
>my parents are already almost 60 because they had me late.
My best friend's mother had him when she was 50 and now he is 30 and she 90 and his life is a living hell because of her health issues but imagine that his situation is x10 worse than yours, although i feel you man my parents are around age 60 aswell and it's scary but it's the cycle of life and we need to cope, I love them so much and my life will change a lot without them because they are my only true friends but fuck man, most days i lift to forget

>>76327127
Literally me but 23

>>76327135
what you mean bro you sexless for how long

she’s autistic, latina, has self proclaimed daddy issues, history of toxic relationships, bisexual, a very high sex drive and she’s always been drawn to men with mental issues

yet we have chemistry. she has been very open about all of this and i’m no exception when it comes to mental issues. i’ve met her family and they love me (she never introduced other dudes) and she is head over heels for me. i notice i can’t give it my all because i feel like it will all fall apart anyway. i want to give this a chance even though it might be retarded

>>76327166
in the words of a retarded zoomer white girl: do it for the plot

would it be gay to have a threesome with a FtM couple? i mean, they both still have vaginas and look womanly except for having mustaches

>>76317738 (OP)
Diet coke please.

I'm close to get my degree on an IT career.

what is the best way to make money with IT?

I already had a job as a Game developer, but that shit usually pays less and the work is less secure, so I should start elsewhere.

Money, fitness and bitches. Sadly it seems to be the smartest way to live on these hedonistic times.

>>76318216
Nothing makes me happier to be single than all the guys I know who are dating. Constantly venting about how much their wives/gf's are driving them crazy, nagging them, wasting money money, just generally fucking everything up and making their lives miserable. Even the ones that put on the front that they are in a happy relationship, eventually the mask comes off because I am the friend who doesn't date at all, so they think of me as the guy to vent to, I guess.

>>76317858
What does escorting in a 5 star hotel mean

>>76327166
you've struck gold, moron
and you're thinking of throwing it back in the river because you're too afraid to man up or whatever

>>76321326
Listen to yourself, worshipping this woman who is out riding some guy you know's cock. Pull your head out of your ass and stop acting like this man, it's pathetic.

The job market went to shit right as my job got tremendously worse. My old boss quit and my new boss is a yes man that keeps doling out empty promises that he can never back up, just yanking me by the fucking chain.
I've been doing 60 hour weeks for 5 months now, haven't gotten one ounce of recognition, raise or anything. Only more work. And I'm applying for probably a hundred jobs by this point which is insane given my experience.
I'm starting to wonder if I've been socially shadowbanned or something.

>>76327772
gay 4 pay

>>76327757
start applying for jobs now
the best way to make money is to get a job
invest your money, improve your skillset, work towards promotions instead of being content with your entry level position

>>76327772
it means he dicks down rich middle aged women and/or does gay for pay

>>76326504
sounds like my parents. but im a bigger loser than you and ever older. never really showed any concern about ruining and wasting my life. but its not their fault at all, its 100% mine.

>>76327777

>>76317738 (OP)
Landed into an argument about gay molestation with a girl I met off an app (I know) and she reported and got my hinge banned. This was the main way I was able to meet girls with the amount of working I'm doing.
I know of a way to get around it but right now I just feel sick bros.
I wish the world wasn't like this, raise one for me and pray I can find an incredible wife somehow.

>>76327850
>but im a bigger loser than you and ever older
What's your story? You doing anything to change it?
>>76326764
>Your parents aren’t perfect
Not blaming them - they have every right to be upset
>You’ve got plenty of time to figure things out.
Not really. Clock is ticking, and I'm way behind in terms of developmental and social milestones. Everyone is on their "own path", but at a certain point there's just shit you miss.

>>76328352
The fuck would you even talk about that on a dating app, you absolute sperg

>>76328470
My first message mentioned she look so good I’d suck on her daddy’s dick and then it spiraled out of control

Moscow Mule, if you would be so kind, Barkeep.

For the first time in my life I'm actually trying to be consistent with going to the gym. I had brief periods of time when I used the on-campus gym when I was in college but I always made the excuse of "being too busy" to keep it up. I'm still an underweight DYEL twink and have no idea what I'm doing but I'm trying my best.
I'm worried though. I recently turned 29 and have had the same body type my whole life so I'm not sure if I can do much in terms of building muscle. I'm not looking to be gigantic but at the very least I need some actual muscle on my bones and I worry that it will be harder with my age. Maybe I'm over thinking it too much.
I also worry I may be screwing myself by mainly focusing on arms/shoulders starting out, but those are the parts of me I hate the most so I'm trying to give them extra attention.

>>76326711
I don’t want her to love me romantically because that will incredibly complicate my life and like i told you she already has a bf and i respect boundaries.
I just miss talking to her everyday and now i need a reason to still do that. I can call her and ask her help into getting into the scene but i don’t know how to do it without sounding like i’m trying to get her into her pants. I got the same feeling when i’m with her that i have with my male friends and it’s awesome

>>76318317
Atta boy

>>76328645
you’re a gigolo you should be happy anyone gives a fuck about you

About to smoke the last faggot before getting on my one way flight to Asia. Ive got the yellow fever and ready to be amazed by a functioning society without the melanin rich

>>76328694
my black friend said he smashed more than 100 women in high school. he’s lying, right? no way you can trust a nigger

>>76321326
Get a grip, and a life

>>76328701
I’ve death gripped my dick so much it no longer has life

>>76327166
You're going to need to put your foot down and establish boundaries or she will look for another dude to put her on a leash

>>76326411
It works on women too.

>>76328699
The fact that you're asking me this means your dad must have been a nigger off to get milk and black and wilds because why are you such a pussy

>>76328714
i called my dad black and he got so offended

Trying to lose weight to score a qt.
The weight loss is at least going well. On track to hit 100kg goals by Christmas.

>>76328699
You know it’s bullshit when not even the anons on /fit/ brag about that many lol

>>76328757
I'm getting up there. I'm somewhere between 75-100. I'm of the mindset to give every girl a try and my best prospect is literally in a cult and a bigger whore than me on average. (though I am better at being one then her, but I'm constrained by my work).

>>76327127
Longest I’ve gone since losing my virginity is 6 years. And that was after I went from virgin never even kissed a girl to having a BPD nympho gf who would suck me dry and force me to creampie her multiple times a day while also having multiple other girls suck me off to suddenly nothing.
This is easier because now I genuinely like being alone most of the time, but yeah at the same time I recognize the need of closeness more than anything. I think it’s barely about busting a nut and more so just having a bond and being close. The way I imagine meeting up with her entails a ton of cuddling and spooning.
>depressed
Yeah. But why? Tfw will never be a primitive human who hunts and fishes all day to provide for his wife, comes home fucks her to sleep, kills any man who gets near my shelter, raises sons and knows nothing of civilized life.
Inb4 no you would die living like that. At least I would be living.

>fit
>healthy
>parents still alive
>good hairline
>friends
>well-paying job
>share a house with my mate
And yet I'm still miserable and despondent every day because I walk through my hometown and see endless immigrants, foreigners and pajeets.

>>76327810
elaborate. my friends tell me it’s a bunch of red flags and it’s making me hesitant because i can see why they say that. it

>>76328708
yeah no clue if that’s something i can do. she can be quite intense which i guess is something that comes with a latina

>>76328997
Unless you’re that escort faggot i don’t want to hear about your gay larps

>>76328680
It’s not my job m8. I don’t live off this.
Probably that’s why the distance hurts.
She cared about me more than my mother and i care about her. Despite her black and harsh exterior she was the most solar girl i’ve ever met.
I can make tons of male friends easily and got 5 close friends but with females i always perform. With her I could just be me

>>76329115
Just pick something that matters to you and fight her to the death on it. Even if you lose because you're a beta she will respect that you arent just a face sitting mat.

>>76329242
If you're gonna fuck a lot of girls in a short period of time make sure they are petite or your pelvis gonna be bruised after three days of morning and evening dick carousel.

>>76329471
>give every girl a try
Please don’t tell us you were just banging anything

>>76329480
Requires getting my dick up still so gotta have something exciting going for them still

>>76317738 (OP)
I'm hungover as shit but Luke with the Outdoor Boys YouTube channel is the comfiest goddamn mother fucker /out/ there.

>do nothing all day
>tired as fuck
>feels like the day is dragging on forever
>still 5pm
>won't be able to sleep before midnight
>shitposting stopped working as a way to kill time

wtf do I do now, I'm tired AND aware of how shit my life is.