>>76539329
my guess is you have many activities that offer mainly one of
a. fun
b. productive
c. self-improving
but only recently have realized that you have all three in this set of activities. If so, the risk is burning yourself out one way or another, and you could pull back a bit by accepting that not everything you do has to accomplish multiple purposes. You don't need to have fun even while taking a shit.
OTOH, maybe you're just hitting a groove. I've "worked out for a long time" but mostly sucked at doing different activities in a haphazard manner, and recently I started a new program which I like enough that I'm going to have come up with new restrictions, like "don't get some sets in 5min before bed you retard". But mainly this is good for me, nothing to see existential angst in.