Thread 76586340

>calf raises
>have a cow now

>bench press
>don't even read the news

>jumping jacks
>my name is john

>decline bench
>do it anyway

>curls
>my hair is straight

>farmers walks
>I'm a city slicker

>>76586361
Well, pardon us, Mr. Gucci loafers.

>bulgarian split squats
>no bulgarians to split them with

>ez bar curl
>not easy

>leg extensions
>not getting taller

>clean and jerk
>now I have to shower again

>concentration curls
>i'm not in auschwitz

>>76586340 (OP)
>chest press
>friend asked me to stop

>ab crunches
>have to go to the ER

>squat
>they can't evict me without a court ruling

>French Press
>Poor coffee into my mug

>>76586754
>french press
>actually only have a moka pot

>stomach crunch
>it's actually quite soft and quiet

>>76586340 (OP)
don't have a cow man!

>good mornings
>in the evening

>Preacher curls
>Am an atheist

>Romanian Deadlift
>Can't find a dead Romanian

>Smith squat
>don't even own a forge

>barbell row
>worse at rowing than an oar

>running
>nobody pursuing me

>cycle
>male

>pull-ups
>none left for the todlers

the world would be a better place if masons never existed

>hip thrust
>look like a total square

>resistance bands
>thousands of retarded hippies pull up

>>76586960
>Romanian deadlifts
>end up robbing graves with these two scary looking guys named Constantin and Alexandru

>gym
>wears clothes

>>76587415
>sumo deadlift
>loses tournament and commits sudoku

>seated rear delt fly
>missed my connection
>have to wait at ORD for 6 hours

>rows
>dont live close to a body of water

>planks
>not made of wood

>burpees
>I dont apologize

>>76587502
>planks
>scared of pirates

>mountain climbers
>scared of heights

>body building
>investigated for unethical experimentation

>>76586340 (OP)
i work in the meat department and that shit's hilarious

>rock climbing
>it’s still on the ground

>facepull
>yeah, I'll give my dick a rest

>freestyle swim
>flail randomly and drown to death

>box jumping
>get punched in the balls

>skull crushers
>best I can do is beer cans

>suicides
>die

>french twists
>le petit dejeuner

woops, they're Russian

>cable crossover
>it never gets aired

>>76586340 (OP)
>weighted dips
>*tips fedora*

>skull crushers
>my head remains intact

>power cleans
>everything is as dirty as before

>hammer curl
>it's a dumbbell, not a hammer

>Leg press
>Fake news

>Smith machine
>My name is Jonathan

>Hip thrusts
>I am a 34yo virgin

>>76586340 (OP)
Boneless pork rectums are served in restaurants as calimari.

>>76586340 (OP)
>reverse fly
>I'm not a hummingbird

>hammer curls?
>I barely know her!

>Sissy Squat
>Regular Squats to me

>>76586340 (OP)
>have a cow
^--- Don't do this!

>>76586344
news? yeah i frequent pol and x

>kroc rows
>I'm wearing sneakers

>chin up
>have positive outlook

>dips
>no chips

>Guillotine press
>Lose head

>>76588159
kek
must be a real heavyweight

>>76586340 (OP)
>Hindu squat
>Shit on the street

>Deadlift
>Still alive

>Chest press
>She slaps me

>Nordic curl
>Im mediterranean

>>76586340 (OP)
>Cable flies
>Can't catch it

>>76590401
>Bicep curls
>Auch

>Farmer's carry
>doesn't have a farm

>>76590401
best one so far

>>76590392
Ha

>fireman carry
>burn lungs
>injured person retrieved
>no regrets

>>76586340 (OP)
>suitcase carries
>nowhere to go :(

>ruck
>ruh-roh, Raggy

>Leg extensions
>Legs don't actually get longer

>clappers
>lights sut off

>kickbox
>it breaks
>regret

>rowing machine
>"that's racist"

>chin up
>been staring at the ceiling ever since

>lunges
>made you flinch

>>76587511
A burper is the one who burps and is obliged to apologise for burping. A burpee is the burp receiver, the one who gets burped on, and not apologising is their default state.

>>76586340 (OP)
>Boneless pork rectum
Nah, I want bone-in pork rectum