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Thread 76709176

154 posts 94 images /fit/
Anonymous No.76709176 >>76709178 >>76709316 >>76709375 >>76709604 >>76709749 >>76709803 >>76710109 >>76710794 >>76711308 >>76711340 >>76712690 >>76714208 >>76714237 >>76714789 >>76718107
/fit/ humor thread
Anonymous No.76709178 >>76711219 >>76719435
>>76709176 (OP)
Anonymous No.76709185 >>76710445 >>76711308 >>76712575 >>76713657 >>76714205 >>76714257
Anonymous No.76709191 >>76710763
>>>/wsg/5991365
Anonymous No.76709199
Anonymous No.76709202
Anonymous No.76709206
Anonymous No.76709207
Anonymous No.76709209
Anonymous No.76709212
Anonymous No.76709213
Anonymous No.76709217 >>76719552
Anonymous No.76709304
Anonymous No.76709316 >>76709666 >>76710505 >>76710724 >>76713251 >>76714819
>>76709176 (OP)
Anonymous No.76709375 >>76709626 >>76709803
>>76709176 (OP)
When i was a teen i went for two years to a taekwondo gym. I quitted it because the gym was full of old and fat women and weak skinnyfat nerds. Everyone hated me because when we trained kicking the pads i went full retard on it and every time i kicked the pads they flew across the whole tatami because of their fucking weak butter hands. I hate normies so much, they ruin everything
Anonymous No.76709604
>>76709176 (OP)
Quits two minutes into bjj warmup
Anonymous No.76709626 >>76709685
>>76709375
>quitted
Anonymous No.76709666
>>76709316
based russoids, for once
Anonymous No.76709685 >>76709703
>>76709626
No one cares about you're shit language
Anonymous No.76709703 >>76710233
>>76709685
Then why are you speaking it?
Anonymous No.76709749 >>76709887 >>76710235 >>76710697 >>76712238 >>76712238 >>76712251 >>76714238 >>76717488 >>76719433 >>76719510
>>76709176 (OP)
almost thought that was mighty mouse she was demolishing
Anonymous No.76709803
>>76709176 (OP)
>>76709375
This is the shit they teach in self-defense classes and Krav Maga. Their demonstrations almost always have the attacker standing still with no resistance.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wV9-1l5zTEs
Anonymous No.76709887 >>76711570
>>76709749
What the fuck is the context here, is that little asian a chick or just a small dude? She needs a hug
Anonymous No.76710109 >>76710167 >>76711042 >>76713223 >>76714264
>>76709176 (OP)
Is this the female fighter Anon's been asking about in a different thread? I beat her without getting up.
Anonymous No.76710167 >>76710425 >>76710454 >>76710461 >>76710535 >>76711042 >>76711211 >>76714196 >>76718089
>>76710109
This shit is what he Internet looks like now, when you can no longer call people retarded faggots.

These moves are just the irl equivalent of "well I guess you couldn't debunk my theory on the flat earth after all, looks like I just won another debate".

Someone running in and dropkicking this fat fuck in the face, killing him instantly is the irl version of when we could still say "you're a retarded fucking faggot nigger, kill yourself you fucking cretin".
Anonymous No.76710233
>>76709703
To make fun of anglo whitoids. They are peak involuntary comedy.
Anonymous No.76710235
>>76709749
hot
Anonymous No.76710425
>>76710167
I'm sorry if I did something to offend you anon
Anonymous No.76710445 >>76710513
>>76709185
Ignorant of their own comedic toothlessness.
Anonymous No.76710454 >>76710510
>>76710167
>Someone running in and dropkicking this fat fuck in the face, killing him instantly is the irl version of when we could still say "you're a retarded fucking faggot nigger, kill yourself you fucking cretin".

Personally I think someone dropkicking or just punching him with good technique would be the equivalent of a well-founded argument.
Something we need more of in this godforsaken reality.
Anonymous No.76710461
>>76710167
>now
Systema larpers have been the lolcows of the martial arts community since the 00's.
Anonymous No.76710505
>>76709316
If you get out of cities I bet Canada is 0%
The colder your country is, the less livable it becomes as a vegetarian
Anonymous No.76710510 >>76710517
>>76710454
Yeah, but you can bring back objects from under the horizon with a powerful enough zoom lens. Because water always finds its level, which is impossible on a spinning ball.
Anonymous No.76710513
>>76710445
This is funny all the way around lmaooooo
Anonymous No.76710517
>>76710510
Lmao dont pull me into some dumb ass argument you fucking retard I was contributing to discussion about the state of the internet.
Anonymous No.76710535 >>76713663
>>76710167
The desperation in how you try to tie these two totally different things together is very strange.
Anonymous No.76710697 >>76711570
>>76709749
is he teaching a class on how to beat your wife?
Anonymous No.76710724
>>76709316
Does eating cow shit count as a vegetarian meal?
Anonymous No.76710763
>>76709191
i don't get it
Anonymous No.76710794
>>76709176 (OP)
Anonymous No.76711042
>>76710109
>>76710167
>These moves are just the irl equivalent of "well I guess you couldn't debunk my theory on the flat earth after all, looks like I just won another debate
I accept your concession. Nothing personnell kiddo. Those moves are just a little too advanced for you.
Anonymous No.76711211
>>76710167
So you willingly fold whenever you're debating a flat earther?
Anonymous No.76711219 >>76711242 >>76712624 >>76716529
>>76709178
Anonymous No.76711242 >>76711361 >>76712707 >>76717320
>>76711219
Juden Peterstein deserves to be hated for being a zionist wef stooge peddling self-help schlock, but his place was a mess that day because he was moving.
Anonymous No.76711308
>>76709176 (OP)
>>76709185
Lmao
Anonymous No.76711340
>>76709176 (OP)
I'm not a karatefag but isnt this how learn to do shit? Start slowly doing the moves then go faster as you get learn the right form?
Anonymous No.76711361
>>76711242
I'll hate him for being a pill-addicted retard, I don't really give a shit about all the rest
Anonymous No.76711556 >>76717671 >>76719495
Anonymous No.76711570 >>76719510
>>76709887
>>76710697
Jean Carrillo, he's a french dude who teaches how to defend yourself. Basically he preaches all self-defense courses are useless bullshit and that you have to punch the guy first. Last I've heard of him he was training MMA in L-A.
Anonymous No.76712035 >>76714087
Anonymous No.76712039 >>76716539 >>76718935
Anonymous No.76712238 >>76714238
>>76709749
>>76709749
that bitch is extremely wet i just know
Anonymous No.76712251 >>76716545
>>76709749
Anonymous No.76712256
Anonymous No.76712264 >>76714508
Anonymous No.76712469 >>76712538 >>76712692 >>76712850 >>76717661
Anonymous No.76712538
>>76712469
This hurts to watch
This is the person who'll talk to you and unironically say shit like "ye I used to dl 4pl8 but somehow I got injured bro my best days are gone bro"
Anonymous No.76712575
>>76709185
>i went to the doctor
>i went to the mountain
Anonymous No.76712624
>>76711219
>JUST GET THE BLOODY JAB BUVKO!
>ANYBODY WHO QUESTIONS JEWISH SUPREMACY IS A PSYCHOPATH!
I hope he kills himself soon now that he is fading into irrelevance.
Anonymous No.76712690
>>76709176 (OP)
Damn did Seagal lose weight?
Anonymous No.76712692 >>76712699 >>76712726
>>76712469
how does someone get to this weight with such shit form without injuring themselves?
Anonymous No.76712699 >>76712923
>>76712692
there's not a whole lot of weight on the bar, just really weird plate selection
Anonymous No.76712707 >>76712741
>>76711242
This doesn't even make sense. When you're moving, things are in boxes, not strewn out over the floor and counters.
Anonymous No.76712726
>>76712692
I'm sure he's injured
Anonymous No.76712731 >>76712867 >>76713233 >>76714556
Anonymous No.76712741
>>76712707
I see an unplugged ac unit, two boxes, a picture unhung, a basket of wires, something wrapped in bubble wrap, and a power drill case. Looks like someone in the process of moving.
Anonymous No.76712850 >>76712923 >>76714218
>>76712469
thats not even 3pl8 by my estimation how the fuck
Anonymous No.76712867
>>76712731
>those tabs
lel bretty gud. brings me back to the old days
Anonymous No.76712923
>>76712699
>>76712850
It's 180kg or almost 400lbs if you go by Olympic color schemes. Still not worth destroying your back over
Anonymous No.76712942
Anonymous No.76713223 >>76716476
>>76710109
lol systema sucks so much. Even the krav retards at least workout a little bit. I collect pirated martial arts videos because I'm dumb and have tons of systema instructionals and they're all shit. The real gold would be telling you how this guy convinces a room of able bodied Russian men to listen to his every word with reverence but nobody will ever make that video. That is the one impressive part of every "bullshido" type of teacher. They're all master manipulators which would actually be useful to learn
Anonymous No.76713233 >>76714887
>>76712731
what's the humor? he's too skinny for it to be a relevant concern?
Anonymous No.76713251 >>76714151 >>76714262
>>76709316
wtf is going on in mexico? can't be true
Anonymous No.76713657
>>76709185
how do you guys not maul them on the spot?
Anonymous No.76713663
>>76710535
found the well poison specialist
Anonymous No.76713781 >>76716440
Anonymous No.76714087
>>76712035
brvtal mog
how will HOMOs ever recover
Anonymous No.76714151 >>76714262
>>76713251
Rice, beans, veggies, cheese, tortillas can be fire by itself. You can throw in some meat, but it’s not needed.
Anonymous No.76714196
>>76710167
This sissy is out there defending round earth theory for free lmao
Anonymous No.76714205
>>76709185
Grim
Anonymous No.76714208 >>76717661
>>76709176 (OP)
Me in the back.
Anonymous No.76714218 >>76716568
>>76712850
Are you clinically retarded?
Anonymous No.76714237 >>76714322 >>76717451 >>76717650
>>76709176 (OP)
>KungPo Fighter II
Anonymous No.76714238
>>76709749
>>76712238
0:14 her honest smile before she remembers she's on camera and supposed to look sad.
Anonymous No.76714257 >>76716512 >>76719557
>>76709185
Real talk, what could they possibly say? It's legal to film cops, and nothing is being interfered with.
Anonymous No.76714262 >>76716498
>>76713251
>>76714151
Vegetarians and vegans ruined their image when they focused on tofu and imitation meat when they could have pushed fish, legumes, grains, and normal food.
Anonymous No.76714264 >>76716519
>>76710109
It's all fun and games until you realize this is essentially how many martial arts, especially bjj, work. You essentially have to agree to be bound by the conventions of the sport you're participating in.

Out in the wild though, I'm grabbing the closest large object and swinging for the fences.
Anonymous No.76714322 >>76714475 >>76714843
>>76714237
that sad creature used to be a female
Anonymous No.76714475
>>76714322
still is
Anonymous No.76714508 >>76714519
>>76712264
This just made me real sad. Hope he finds someone to train him one day
Anonymous No.76714519
>>76714508
video looks to be 5 years old. Maybe his hard lifting has kicked in!
Anonymous No.76714556 >>76714588 >>76716336
>>76712731
So, do bees get depressed or not? We need to know.
Anonymous No.76714588 >>76716336
>>76714556
Beekeeper here. Worker bees are insects. Literally. Of course they get depressed. Imagine you're just going along, sniffing flowers and stuff, and then you realize you're just a bug. Depressing as fuark.
Anonymous No.76714789
>>76709176 (OP)
You know this is an art, right? You have to learn and remember these moves. She is WAY better than you, I can promise you, jack.
Anonymous No.76714819 >>76716481 >>76719443
>>76709316
Ummmmmmmmmmmm
Wouldnt India have the most everything, I dont get it.
Anonymous No.76714843
>>76714322
>used to
Anonymous No.76714887
>>76713233
There is no difference I think is the humor. He probably sees it, though.
Anonymous No.76716336 >>76716488
>>76714556
>>76714588
They don’t live long enough to be depressed, about 1/3 of bees toil their lives away and never taste the honey they create.
one of the few creatures like this. Worth noting the social order of the honeybee has a female at its epicenter. This is what will happen unless we overthrow women. Women must be enslaved again. Or else we shall be bred by them into bees who unquestioningly labor our lives away for rewards we shall never taste.
Anonymous No.76716440 >>76716462 >>76716490 >>76716571
>>76713781
Why the fuck are they always posing in public bathrooms? Women do this shit too. On every dating app there's so many pictures of them posing in front of mirrors in public bathrooms, do they not have their own house? What the FUCK?
Anonymous No.76716462
>>76716440
Even in a bathroom at home comes off trashy.
Anonymous No.76716476 >>76719823
>>76713223
>They're all master manipulators
Are they or so they just attract idiots? If you formed a class teaching this type of shit you'd get some takers, the smarter ones would realise you were full of shit and leave, and you'd be left with absolute morons that think it's real. There's no magical manipulation skill, just being shameless enough to keep trying the same bullshit until you find a taker.
Anonymous No.76716481
>>76714819
>Percentages herp derp
Anonymous No.76716488 >>76716492
>>76716336
Worker bees are female anon. The queen produces males only to get fucked by those males who then die. So with women in charge we will briefly live just to fuck our own mothers.
Anonymous No.76716490
>>76716440
Pump doesn't last long enough is my guess. My pumps only last about 20 min, not enough time to get home and undressed.
Anonymous No.76716492 >>76717630
>>76716488
Wait, I got it wrong, they don't fuck their own queen, they leave the hive to find virgin queens from other hives. Up to you whether this is better or worse.
Anonymous No.76716498 >>76717611
>>76714262
>fish
>vegetarian
yeah surely vegetarians just need high quality advice from people like you
Anonymous No.76716512
>>76714257
If you film then and then accidently drop the phone and it just happens to shatter, what would you do? Call the cops?
Anonymous No.76716519 >>76717634
>>76714264
Huh? Sparring (aka rolling) is essential to bjj. You cannot advance or even improve if you're not putting your skills to the test against resisting opponents.
No one's saying you will dodge a bullet by pulling guard. It's a system to win in grappling.
Anonymous No.76716529
>>76711219
Classic example of that you can have good and bad points/characteristics. In the social media age, people tend to gravitate to black or white positions, but that's rarely how life works. Hope this taught som early buyers a valuable lesson. Like that you can give some good advice and still be a flawed person.
Or like my previous colleague who was likely borderline retarded and undoubtedly double digit IQ, but still a pretty good dude and a loyal person. He had your back no matter what and always friendly, but he also thought that playing basketball made you taller. He was a teacher.

Two things can be true.
Anonymous No.76716539
>>76712039
To be fair, not everyone develops normally. I just found an old pic of mine when I was like 14-15 and I was shocked at how underdeveloped my jaw looked.
Anonymous No.76716545
>>76712251
It sucks cuz I trained at a martial arts club as a teen and we drilled exclusively on the "reality" side. As in, we did knife training with marked knives after extensive defense training, and told to go ham on each other. Obviously everyone got shanked and a "good" result was to be stabbed less than 3 times, with the point being that you don't wanna get in a knife fight because you'll go to the hospital if you're lucky or die if you're not.
Also all our trainers were active or formers combantants in kickboxing or MMA and our grappling was just no-gi submission wrestling, but with fewer rules than IFBJJ. In fact, when I eventually transitioned into no-gi bjj comps, I was confused because so many techniques are illegal that I was used to implementing.
Anonymous No.76716568 >>76717333
>>76714218
i read lbs and not kg so maybe
still not anywhere near enough to justify that shit
Anonymous No.76716571
>>76716440
To take pics right after your workout while pumped. It's not rocket science. It's obnoxious (if others are around), but it's easy to understand, brainlet.
Anonymous No.76716677 >>76716681 >>76717621
post humor retards
Anonymous No.76716681 >>76717150 >>76717621
>>76716677
broke that poor... uh... girl's? heart
Anonymous No.76717126 >>76717177 >>76718905
Anonymous No.76717129 >>76717212
Anonymous No.76717150 >>76717621
>>76716681
It's a man
>inb4 rent free
He's stated in multiple videos that he's a tranny. I think some videos even feature clips pre-transition. He was a zesty fat boy.
Anonymous No.76717177 >>76717451
>>76717126
i loved darren ratcliffe in harry potter, can't believe he got fat
Anonymous No.76717212 >>76717869
>>76717129
Why do people have to make such a big deal out of this stuff? Can't you just not have kids and that's it? Do you have to throw a party because you ain't having kidds? What kind of milestone worth celebrating is tgat?
Anonymous No.76717225
Anonymous No.76717320 >>76717451
>>76711242
Peterstein ? I thought he was christian ?
Anonymous No.76717333
>>76716568
You do even lift? Or are you just colorblind?
Anonymous No.76717451
>>76714237
>mfw i have those pants
>>76717177
can't tell if bait but that's not his name
>>76717320
a Christian would support retaking the holy land, not fellating jew penis
Anonymous No.76717488
>>76709749
You can see her smile. What a slut.
Anonymous No.76717611
>>76716498
I bet you think shellfish are bad.
Anonymous No.76717621 >>76717662
>>76716677
>>76716681
>>76717150
Same person?
Anonymous No.76717630 >>76717707
>>76716492
Bee sex for the male:
>you're born for one purpose, and one purpose only, to fuck a queen. If you're lucky you're first in line, but at least she's guaranteed to be just a few days old. No old lady sex. If you succeed, your erection literally tears your body apart and you die. If you fail, you're eventually turned out by the workers to die in the cold as winter approaches.
For the queen:
>You get one fantastic flight out as a virgin wherein you ride every cock you can find and then you're chained to the hive, forever pumping out babies until you die.
Workers:
>Yeah, you're female all right, but your parts aren't developed, they never will develop, and no male will ever touch you. At most, if your queen dies unexpectedly you might freak out and start laying unfertilized eggs.
Anonymous No.76717634 >>76718236
>>76716519
Ever seen videos of bjj where one guy refuses to go to ground?
Anonymous No.76717650
>>76714237
Once you were a vegahn, now you will be gone
Anonymous No.76717661
>>76714208
Lost hard lmaoooo


>>76712469
I audibly groaned in pain watching this
Anonymous No.76717662
>>76717621
yes

On the plus side, it seems to at least be a good sport about people on the internet making fun of it.
Anonymous No.76717671
>>76711556
Again, this is just a calorie thing
Eat more then cut
Anonymous No.76717707
>>76717630
>bee women are all virgin femcels
That's kinda hot
Anonymous No.76717869
>>76717212
no because they envy the milestones and the attention. there is a hole there and shit like this helps them pretend that there isnt
Anonymous No.76718089
>>76710167
Couldn't agree more
Anonymous No.76718107
>>76709176 (OP)
She has to hold back her punches because a punch from her would obliterate them since force = mass x acceleration
Anonymous No.76718236 >>76718419
>>76717634
Guard pulling is just an edge case created by poorly thought out competition rules, that many comps still roll with because "that's how it always worked"
More and more comps now fully prohibit pulling guard unless you have a solid connection with your opponent
Anonymous No.76718340
Anonymous No.76718342 >>76718345
Anonymous No.76718345
>>76718342
Oh no! Hope that never happens to me.
Anonymous No.76718419
>>76718236
Reminds me of when I was explaining to my kids how Daniel got his ass kicked in Karate Kid 2 trying to use the swan kick that worked so well in 1 against a tournament oriented teenager that had only ever seen karate.

Tournament tournament tournament. If you're training for tournaments you better just not even bother.

Was 3 days ago watching my kids' TKD instructor talk about catching a kick and to do with it, and he's going through all this shit, and I'm just thinking, walk forward and knock his ass down! But no, can't do that.
Anonymous No.76718662
Anonymous No.76718905
>>76717126
that's Darnell Ratcliffe
Anonymous No.76718935
>>76712039
That beard was 13 pounds
Anonymous No.76719433
>>76709749
There's one of her getting choked its even hotter
Anonymous No.76719435
>>76709178
Haha that guys in drug addict ward now, fuck him
Anonymous No.76719443
>>76714819
Holy fuck you're dumb
Anonymous No.76719495
>>76711556
holy cope
Anonymous No.76719510
>>76711570
>>76709749
have you got a source or name to that video
Anonymous No.76719552
>>76709217
who are these perfectly moral people fighting the homosexuals? MAGA? Actaully I don't care this perspective is so fucking stupid.
Anonymous No.76719557 >>76719916
>>76714257
Depends on jurisdiction. It's illegal to record police in Russia and Ukraine, you will be flagged as shpion
Anonymous No.76719823
>>76716476
For some yes but there is more to it. Look at Steven Seagal. He had one of the most powerful agents in Hollywood as a student and convinced that guy to make him a movie star. Two years later this bald dork with no physique who never acted before is on par with Arnold and Van Damme.

Being a "martial arts master" carries some perceived influence to people who are interested in that area but some of these guys take it to the extreme with highly skilled suggestion that I think is pretty interesting. Obviously a lot of people will reject it but the ones that don't aren't necessarily idiots
Anonymous No.76719916
>>76719557
>Russia and Ukraine
Those are quite literally slave race colonies. Irrelevant because it doesn't happen in real countries.