>>76717695 (OP)
I had a psychotic break one time that was super bad, almost killed someone, was restrained and committed.
after that experience, I was gifted(?) divine willpower or something. if I want to do anything, I just do it. similarly, if I dont want to react to something, I also wont. someone could be screaming in my face and I wont feel anything.
it's pretty nice. I can still understand "feelings" at an intellectual level but can freeze them out at an emotional level. the negative is that my behavior is hard on others if I dont think about my actions.
so I applied this to getting fit. I was always rather athletic but not super build and had a bit higher bf%. also im on no meds btw, just coffee.
my takeaway is that you have to remember addiction and cravings and all that are just fake chemical signals. you dont have to pay them any heed. just ignore them, done.