I have a coding interview in 2h. I literally can't code and just lied in the resume. My plan was to learn the most I possibly could before my resumes turned into a real interview, but that failed because I procrastinated it all.
I'm showing up anyway. I'll take that one for the team and tell you how it went after it's finished.
The interviewer will have a funny story for the rest of his life about the idiot who thought he could fake his way into the company.
Wish me luck!

>>105986457 (OP)
good luck bro

>>105986457 (OP)
After reading (fake) posts like these I always ask myself why I don't do more

Well op? Gonna deliver or be a faggola

Just pretend your mother is dying in the hospital and you have to check your phone frequently then ask chatgpt

godspeed anon

>>105986457 (OP)
just download that cheating tool

I'm back. Interviewer left me waiting for more than one hour. He apologized profusely to me. There was another guy waiting to be interviewed as well.
He had an Armenian sort of accent but his name was just Samuel, so I'm assuming he was an Israeli jew. He felt very very guilty for leaving me waiting. So much so that he didn't humiliate me when I couldn't create code to print the last half of a vector without using LAN. Probably reasoned I was nervous due to the time wasted or whatever. After my cringefest of blaming "the compiler" and whichever other tech words I knew for my incompetence, he asked me to design a database for a fictional hospital.
Unfortunately, this story isn't very funny. I've worked as a data entry monkey before, so I know roughly how a database is organized. He probably saw me as an amateur agrandizing the resume instead of a total liar, which I am. Most of the interview was just personality questions.
He was clearly uncomfortable, but was trying to interact with and laugh at everything I said — probably because of his feeling of guilt. I've never seen someone try so hard to make me not dislike them.
Sorry for not meeting your expectations, frens. I would have loved to share a story with more embarrassment envolved, though. If any of my fake CVs get me another interview, I'll make a point to fuck it up in the most awkward way possible for you.
Now back to rewatching K-On!

>>105988466
I regret to inform you that I have chosen a different thread to shitpost in. We wish you the best of luck in your future story thread endeavors.

Warm Regards,

Anon

>>105988466
Tell us what your faked cv was like

>>105988466
damn nigga thats some insane luck
i hope you get the job

>>105986457 (OP)
>The interviewer will have a funny story for the rest of his life about the idiot who thought he could fake his way into the company.
I did interviews once and it really isn't that unusual or funny. There's a surprising amount of candidates who show up and just cannot fucking code for shit. You just shrug and write off another applicant into the trash pile, it's not even memorable.
To really make it interesting you'd have to find some clever way to fuck it up. Maybe learn just enough programming to try to come up with an insane schizo overcomplicated solution and lead the interviewer through it while they're staring dumbfounded. Most interviewers will try to stop you if you're going too far off-track, both for your own good and to also not waste their own time, but if you just nod and agree and go "I see of course, thanks for pointing out!" or whatever and proceed to just plough ahead anyway, there's a good chance they'll just give up and let you dig yourself in.
But you have to know enough programming to be able to come up with something like that in the first place. If you simply can't write code then you'll just be a boring routine rejection, sorry to say.

>>105986457 (OP)
>>105988466
>I literally can't code
i hope you get hired, companies that hire people like you deserve bad workers because they prefer exaggerated appearances over geniune but modest skill

>>105986457 (OP)
Good morning saar

>>105986457 (OP)

good luck anonfrog remember anything is fake exept merch leave company before hot drinks turn out stale