Thread 212035356

legs of a fish edish

ahem

Jokes write themselves

birds of a feather

>>212035401
He's done you to be fair

merde
putain du merde

so glad im not toiling today

watching my video game streaming personalities like a zoomerfied runt (im 34)

>>212035429
c'est fini

off that evil nigga poindexter wack pack

>>212035401
>6 in The Revolt
Ah yes, the party lead by the private-educated investment banker who wants to give tax cuts to billionaires is certainly trying to topple the establishment.

guys i matched my bench press PR today. Was tempted to go for another rep but the fear got to me

>Eat breakfast
>Need something sweet after it
>Eat lunch
>Something sweet
>Dinner
>Dessert
Mindraped by big sugar.

Might wank over violence-against-women scenes in The Sopranos again

>>212035537
Wouldn't mind if it were native Danish or Norwegian immigrants

bizarre legs of a fish edition

mad that the only time im happy is when im drunk everything else is utterly miserable

>>212035537
yeah it is annoying though isn't it? why are they so loud?

>>212035677
looks like u need some cans

Would have solved a lot of problems at once if we just let the pensioners die of COVID. Lots of extra houses, less strain on the NHS, less tax payer money going towards winter fuel payments.

>>212035526
>ignoring the countless other things he/they have done against the establishment most noticably brexit

>>212035686
their genes make them loud

considering becoming based. any tips?

>>212035696
The measures didn't stop anyone getting covid

>>212035693
im in worktoil counting down the minutes to vodkatoil

>>212035706
Brexit was pushed so that farmers would no longer get subsidies and they'd be forced to sell their land to corporations instead of keeping it in the family.

booked the day off and done absolutely fuck all with it.
might go out for a wander.

>>212035724
move your ph

>>212035724
limit harm

>>212035731
fancy her so much it actually makes me feel a bit sad

>>212035742
Absolute retard
Vast majority farmers don't own the land they farm anyway, and they never have in this country

woman at my work has been doing those weight loss injections and she looks like a deflated balloon

>>212035836
Have you told her that

>>212035423
How’s he done me lol?

>lol?
Oh dear leftypol

>>212035875
you've been done, mate. we're all in agreement here.

>>212035849
no that wouldn't be very nice

>>212035785
That doesn't change the fact that Brexit made it harder for the few farmers that still owned a farm to keep hold of their land. And in general, leaving the single market made it much harder for smaller British businesses to operate, which ultimately benefits the larger corporations who can just buy out their resources. The idea that Brexit was anti-establishment is absurd and only idiots who lack critical thinking skills fell for it. Of course, most of them are too arrogant to admit it, so they just double down on their stupidity.

>>212035922
bendy bananas

Hey ofcom! I think you absolutely suck!

Think about it: do you think you've ever genuinely manages to change someones mind about something by arguing with them on 4chan? No? Then stop doing it you fucking stupid wanker.

>>212035922
>That doesn't change the fact that Brexit made it harder for the few farmers that still owned a farm to keep hold of their land
How so

>>212035938
yeah, i think i have, actually.
you're wrong.

still can't believe we called it "brexit" in the first place
fucking stupid name

>>212035938
im not doing it to win. Im doing it for the love of the game

thinking of reading Ulysses but worried i’d turn into a Hibernophile, thoughts?

>>212035956
easier to say than The Referendum on British EU membership

When has it ever been easy to be a "small business" in this country? Literally never

>>212035974
most of his characters aren't exactly flattering, wouldn't worry about that too much. should read Dubliners first if you haven't already

Today has been a triumphant return to form for SpainLord

>>212035952
Guarantee you didn't.

farmers are the most spoiled cunts in the country they got their land hundreds of years ago from some king or queen and now refuse to give up an inch of it. they also all abuse every grant system going and destroy the roads with their machinery which is far too big

>>212036027
did actually.

>Al-Qassam Brigades:
>After returning from the frontlines, Al-Qassam fighters confirmed that they killed three Zionist soldiers with light weapons at point-blank range east of Jabalia, north of the Gaza Strip.

>>212036020
... yeah?

Is a road rager always in the wrong no matter what?

>>212036033
Proof?

>>212036033
well, you've convinced me

>>212036054
haha proof, proof, got a source for that?
dear me, just pack it in, your concession has been humbly accepted, your mind? changed.

>>212036031
yea fuck the people who make food
pave over their land to house the drug dealers and uber eats delivery slaves

crazy how im better than all of you

>>212036044
yeah

>>212035401
baffled at people who cannot spell in the year of allah 2025
BAFFLED

sadly I don't think Deegs will go to heaven
he's taken the lord's name in vain, see

if you absolutely had to choose, would you rather have a knob up your arse or in your mouth?

>>212036120
mouth

>>212036085
proofs??

>>212036120
arse

>>212036134
bit bent that mate. far better to take it up the arse, who knows you might enjoy it lol

>>212036105
fuq u talm bout nuthin boi

Proper laugh at you saddos who cannot drive

Whoever decided that brioche rolls should be used as burger buns should be shot

>>212036168
i be sucking tranny cock and loving it

>>212035742
lmao
this is what delusional labourites believe

>>212036073
fuck em greedy cunts they should be nationalised

knobber

(8) do you like jazz (8)
>>212036105
where?

>>212035742
>Brexit was pushed so that farmers would no longer get subsidies
oh right you mean the subsidies that were replaced with domestic equivalents post-Brexit? Them ones?

I will not eat a single morsel of food until BlackRock owns every single asset in this entire country.

We at /brit/ do not recognise the right for Iran to exist

>>212036236
anon i have some news...

General waste, hard plastics, soft plastics paper, garden waste. Spend my half life sorting rubbish into 100 different bins, enough is enough!

Russia just blamed us for any future attacks on the US

>>212036292
yeah?

>>212036292
lol

>>212036277
Hardly like you have anything else to do is it? Lazy scrote

>>212036292
me? i was asleep

oh fuck off

enjoying an all-paid-for poo at toilberg’s expense

Toilet bogfart having a chernobyl tier meltdown atm

diego would only go to heaven if heaven was the name of a trendy popup small plates "spot" in Shoreditch.

he would be accompanied by a beautiful St Martins student he met on Hinge. she would mock him with her friends in the group chat. "I'm with that old man again LOL". "omdsss what are you like at least get rent out of him LOL". "LOL".

>>212036322
rorke and the sizzling summer of '25

>>212036449
this hits too close to home
(all the pretty young things are on feeld now tho)

>>212036337
hard for me to imagine a swede at toil
in my head you're all just larking about like this all day

Rorke doing a madness

>>212036515
Not illegal is it

Rorke just ReTruthed my post on Truth Social

>>212035356 (OP)
Sam Sparro mentioned

https://youtu.be/C8Z-qKqeWWs?si=2RQH6PQMxN04f5tR

Brown fanny lips. Pink interior. Divine

alrite la were the oasis brothers heres our new song about being poor northern and stupid

>>212036596
Can the reverse occur

>>212036574
Saw this on Reddit as well today

>>212036574
Epstein confirmed this

Oasises' new tour starts next week

>>212036599
Noel might not have been educated, but most educated types can't pull sweet pop songs out of their asses like he could. He had the gift

don't care about death stranding 2
first one wasn't that great desu

3 words I despise
>Bum
>Butt
>Bottom

just say arse you INFANTILE cretin
drives me up the wall desu

>>212036574
I must be skint! aha

maybe l just wanna die
l've got something in my eye
lm just too afraid to die
might just have to eat a pie
YOU AND I GONNA LIVE FOREVER

>>212035356 (OP)
Love anything fish related.
Ihttps://youtu.be/U-76MmeWiRs

>>212036574
why did they update it 3 years later?

>>212036670
Relax mate you’re in your 40s you can’t be having melties like this still at your age

>>212036691
Rorke’s nan onamadone

At the airport getting breakfast

Hideously depressed today

>>212036691
How does this keep happening ffs

some of my earliest wanks were pretending to be a teenage girl and having dirty cybersex in yahoo chatrooms
wonder how many nonces i made spaff over those formative cooming years

me at toil showing everyone my /brit/ friends

>>212036751
haha come on mr grumpy pants. cheer up!

>>212036779
used to do the same on habbo hotel

>>212035356 (OP)
fishino garterino

Should i get a coffee I already had two

Maybe I should just stick with the orange juice

forgot to eat again

fuq u talm bout wack ass nigga

>>212036823
Me getting into the assisted suicide pod

Just gonna stick with the juice and some water

Might get a coffee later on the plane if they don't have free booze

>>212036948
>>212036808
>>212036747
Oh where you going mate oh that's exciting how long for oh right yeah with family is it oh that's lovely have fun pal

wanted to talk to dad about a problem but he started the conversation moaning about me leaving washing up so l didnt bother

doubt dementia nan will last the week lads

>Scottish wingsuit flyer Liam Byrne dies during Swiss Alps jump
lot of people die doing this "sport" don't they? maybe it should be banned

excuse me why are you putting explosive weapons on people
do not do that

>>212037008
bit grim

>>212036996
He succeeded. Was telling you to be a man and bury your problems inside.

>>212037008
Now that you've said that she'l probably live for another 5 years causing your family untold stress, misery and expense

will they let me do wingsuit jumping if I'm suicidal?

>>212037020
kek libtards seething

>>212036996
I honestly don't get why people leave their washing up? Why not just take it down once dry? It's so stupid lol

>>212037014
>"sport"
Well it is so

>>212037044
she's already done that for six years

would be nice if she lasted until October 2 since she'll turn 100 then

>>212037068
Oh right yeah I'll just monitor it every 15 minutes until its dry

>>212037068
l got drunk last night and made some food and didnt put everything away
>>212037027
indeed

>>212036995
Thanks mate

>>212036823
the cuckpit as it were

>>212037068
Clearly meant dishes you mong

Leftypol unmasked

>>212036596
Gross
Are you Irish diaspora?

what 40k army does /brit/ recommend?

>>212037153
The so-called land of the free

you can really tell a lot about a person when you see how they use the internet like what they use the internet to look at

>>212036596
cor

would (You) be strong enough to say Yes?

>>212037166
>Let me break this down.
>Says it all really.
god i fucking hate nerds so much why do they all talk like this

I will not die for Israel I will break my own legs before I die for zionists

>>212037183
For me it's porn and youtube

nigga eating cheese on toast

>>212037205
would be great if you showed the same resolve to oppose pakis

>>212037202
only if its natural insemination

went to the cinema, the British army, air force and navy all had ads before the film.

>>212037202
Right well that's made up isn't it

>>212037202
I was going to ask my mate Leo to be a sperm donor for my kids but he killed himself. True story.

raping my own arse at 999999999991mph

*karate chops the back of your neck*

>>212037209
>youtube
there is a huge vast variety of things to watch and listen to on youtube
just saying "youtube" is not very descriptive or telling in my opinion

>>212037202
fake ragebait but i would kill everyone in the house then myself if this was brought up

>>212037204
They spend their whole lives consuming content about other people living their lives instead of having one themselves so they think people actually talk like that

Some of them even do overtly cartoonish gestures while talking

>>212037256
Okay well just crap on youtube

>>212037253
ow! pack it in

>>212037204
No clue what you're on about, those are all perfectly unobjectionable expressions.

>>212037256
yeah mate. i watch yourube

>>212037240
no actually everything on reddit is true

>>212037240
no
everything on reddit is true

Just resigned from my current job. Still employed but i've told my boss i've given up on their expectation of me and I will instead do something else.

>>212037202
fucking brutal
I see uggos with decent looking kids and good looking parents with ugly kids all the time
his wife needs to chill out

>>212037236
I do though I oppose them all i want them all out

>>212037291
>>212037292
hmm...

>>212036823
betabux provider python developers will spend £1m+ on a house for his gf with a past (it was university, what does it matter? she didn't even know you back then) and only be allowed to enjoy a single cubic metre of it

feeling a bit pugilistic today

>>212037272
so you just click on whatever the suggested or most popular videos are?
tragic

>>212037299
How are you going to do that with broken legs

>>212037317
omds

>>212037240
no they had me impregnate her

she did compromise with her husband in the end though, he was allowed to watch

>>212037303
:)
we are getting married now

>>212037327
easier isn't it

>>212036574
what about flat chest cuties

You couldn't bring yourself to raise someone else's seed? Like your best mate's son even?

doin a survey about wanking

>>212037340
crawl round their houses and drag them out one by one

its that time of day again

:)

>>212037387
Only my brother's

>>212036574
is this why billionaires are all nonces?

>>212037387
dont have any mates

>>212037388
what constitutes a binge?

>>212037387
i could do that

>>212037455
2 hours +

>>212037388
multiple times per day

>>212037387
Yeah sure but I wouldn't let him impregnate my wife or anything like that

>>212037468
2 hours on the wank is mad. Get the 20 minute wanks done and move on

Might try to streamline my wank routine

Takes me about thirty seconds to bust a nut when I need to

>>212037508
2 mins for me
in and out for the pleasure
dont have time for this nonsense

Ive done 13 hours before

thinking about the time me and another lad posted about the same niche topic at the same time with no prior prompt to talk about it. Freaky.

>>212037388
my goon sessions are over 12 hours so it's mathematically impossible for me to have more than one per day

have a SEVERE weed addiction me

>>212037633
bossman giving you that loud or mid?

Tried a career as a philanthropist but didn't really get anywhere

wanking out a poo

>>212037633
dude :(

>>212037632
Me on the right wishing I was on the left

>>212037633
growing some in my greenhouse me. legal here now innit

>>212037714
this but for philanderer

>>212037757
weed :(

Used to be able to land a front flip on my mates trampoline. Wonder if I still can

pooing out a wank

had a right bloody gutful of black "people" being allowed to breathe, enough is enough!

>>212037833
Give it a go mate, definitely won't lead to life-limiting "age related" injury

quit wanking to gay stuff

>>212037694
he gives me mid 'dog, I can get loud off of my London friend but I have to travel for that

>>212037925
why is gay stuff so bloody peng

Less than a quarter of London school kids view themselves as British.

>>212037895
>>212037833
even as a kid i was too anxious to do backflips or land a summersault
grim
i sometimes trick myself into thinking my inhibitions was something environmentally forced onto me but the truth is i was always the odd one out always the coward

>>212037950
No-one asked

I see a bad moon rising
I see trouble on the way

>>212037949
Get the biomass converted into fuel NOW

>>212037865
So shove your big fucking cock up my throat and suffocate me. Otherwise quit your yapping.

>>212037633
>makes gooning feel nicer
>makes vidya fun again
>makes food taste amazing
>makes music sound great
>dulls boredom
if you are a NEET incel tell me why you aren't smoking daily

what if genetic determinism is real

>>212037991
I value having an alert state of mind.

>>212037991
l dont know any dealers

>>212037991
cos it doesnt do any of those things, weed is just fucking boring
it stimulates appetite which arguably i dont want anyway
the single real positive is it ushers away dreams

>>212037991
makes me have panic attacks and i don't find that it dulls boredom at all, it doesn't switch my brain off the way alcohol does, i just kinda sit around being stoned

>>212037976
kek your post reminded me of this

Leftypol swapping his Spotify rotation out for AI-generated music

>>212037998
It is but not everyone gets outed or rewarded for bad or good behavior equally

>>212038046
>panic attacks
Man up

Raw coca leaves are honestly the best
All the benefits of caffeine but more strong, with none of the negatives

>>212035401
I do think a basic competency test should be passed in order to vote. The idea that a senile 90 year old can vote Tory despite not knowing what year it is, or that N'gubuntu and his fourteen cousins (none of whom can speak English) get a say in the running of our country is - frankly - ridiculous.

Would u buy a Mercedes A class? All my mates at work call it a poverty spec mercedes

dad's fully hooked on the GBnews

POV: you're posting on /brit/ from your Australian living room

had a dream last night that hurt my feelings
mad what the self-loathing brain is capable of

>>212038064
i don't mean "ooh i feel a bit anxious and stressed" i mean it makes my heart rate go through the roof and have palpitations and i get fixated on trying not to swallow my tongue and i feel like my throat is closing up and i start breathing manually
probably more of a me problem than a weed problem but it isn't an experience i want to seek out

someone give me a trap beat...

>>212035497
I've seen this image before but have just now realised the humour behind it
A child grappling with their own conscience after they've shot and killed someone

>>212038156
Everyone else experiences this, they just get on with it

>>212038157
bmm chika wa wa bmm CKK wap wap

>>212035516
>>212035537
mad how there are still people who are pro-immigration after the utter catastrophe which the last 3 decades has been. like finding a japanese soldier on a tropical island still fighting ww2 years after the war ended.

got stung saturday night but i'm already pozzed so i dont care

Did someone mention trap???

>>212038086
Yeah but it’s funny hearing a reform
Member saying it because they’d lose half their voters if a IQ test was introduced

I LOVE DRUGS I LOVE GETTING HIGH I LOVE NOT HAVING TO FACE REALITY

>>212038234
So would every party

>>212038201
yes, im the trap god
call me the gardener
cause i move sod
bury opps up to the neck
broken with my black rod

rorke's sensei

>>212038253
ktim

exploring powerful young jewish voices in my evil incel smelly childhood bedroom

>>212038254
Not at all

>>212037979
you want to slobber and nibble on this BWC?

>"This is a perilous moment in the Middle East for which the United Kingdom must understand its share of the blame"
>Foreign Secretary David Lammy gives a statement on the situation in the region following US strikes against Iran
Why is everyone blaming us for this

Dreaming of the total destruction of my enemies

>>212038253
this. one more week then I crack on with life.

>>212038268
Very much so, especially the one you vote for

if you were in a video game, what weapon would you use?

*whacks you in the face with my willard*

>>212038268
really? labour might have more 105 iqers than say reform but if there was an iq cut off of say <120 then i suspect reform would have the most elligible voters lol

THE GOVERNMENT IS BANNING PROTESTS AGAINST GENOCIDE, TAKING ANY ACTION TO RESIST GENOCIDE
AND NOBODY CARES

>>212038294
Sykes-Picot agreement, an agreement between the UK and France on how to carve up the Middle East once the Ottoman Empire is defeated

>>212038323
wish I had a big willy too

>>212038294
honestly, the 5200 suicide bombings they've got planned for us, justified, really, aren't they
we've really done a number on iran by letting the us drop bombs and that

>>212038323
Not quite sure what orientation this knob is in

Drinking myself into a fat arse wank bollock stupor

>>212038306
I don’t vote so done you there

daddy longlegs in the gaff
caught it with some toilet paper and through it down the toilet
the last moment of that bugs life was spent drowning in my stale wee from this morning which I didn't flush
makes you think...

>>212038337
So why isn't this the Ottoman empires fault for conquering these regions in the first place

>>212038323
why is it bent like that?

>>212038337 here, just realised I'm mistaken, I'm drunk and didn't realise Iran wasn't affected by the Sykes Picot agreement

>>212038337
Literally fuck all to do with the conflict

Could really do with being tied down and railed up the bum by a very sexually attractive man

>>212038317
i'd be one of these fellas

>>212038396
you've really embarassed yourself with that one, haven't you?

>>212038375
It would probably be much better if Turkey owned all of the Middle East again. Leave it to them instead of western nations getting involved and having to apologise every other day

>>212038258
reckon all men do shit like this when we're home alone and think no-one is looking to be fair
if a camera was set up in the corner of the living room and only filmed when my parents and sister were out I'd probably get sectioned within a fortnight

>>212038396
Fucking mong

>>212038396
erm its 3 in the afternoon

>>212038411
do you homosexuals think about men the same way we think about women?

>>212038396
>I'm drunk
fair effort for 4pm on a monday, get in

>>212038402
>>212038421
Really fucked this one up aha

>>212038439
I talk to myself a lot

>>212038445
Yeah pretty much

been a fat shit today, so I reckon a self-flagellation gymsesh should be on the cards

>>212038442
>>212038443
Bollock poo gay wank etc

>>212038449
Always 5pm somewhere aha x

>>212038486
wild

>>212038411
This but with a very sexually attractive woman, since I'm not gay

It's 5 o'clock somewhere!

>>212037950
Know someone who needed eye socket surgery after doing this

>>212038502
What are your thoughts on women? Do you believe that you think like a woman?

>>212038510
no it isn't
time zones aren't real

>>212038508
You want to be tied up and railed up the bum by a woman?
Women don't have penises lad...

>>212038489
ill be on the cans later aha x

>>212038416
what were these lads even doing? they just wander around and sometimes try to run away if they see you

>>212038530
think women are incredibly attractive even the unattractive ones are often very attractive in the body
i dont think i think like a woman
if woman thought about men like we think about them the world would be derranged

>>212038551
they're off for a picnic and a few cans

New
>>212038591
>>212038591

NEW
>>212038613

>>212038613