Thread 213997160

BBC Enjoyer edish

poo smells lmao

Expensive watch but use my phone's clock anyway

I received 30 (you)s last thread (out of 300 posts)
That's 10% by my measure.
Safe to say I was the main character.

she wants a man with a fitbit

got to buy some coffee somewhere

for me, it's the incel freak cheap chinky smartwatch

Got into /brit/tubers Ekkomori and Roko recently.

>>213999607
is there any watches that emulate the experience of a really chinky RGB gaming keyboard?

>>213999607
Grand seiko is probably the biggest incel freak brand desu
Nobody will ever care about spring drive, to everyone except other neeks it's exactly the same as a £100 seiko 5 from tk maxx

X is so weird, why are they pretending to be real people?

fuck up you dog cunt before i bash your fuckjing head in. you think im scared of going back to prison? fuck no, send me back, right after i cave your shit cunt skull in you munter

>>213999647
there's hundreds of different themes you can put on mine, one of them is probably rgb

>>213999692
Catch your reflection looking at you again?

also that reminds me i need a new keyboard, i've not got a new one in ages, starting to dislike mechanical

>>213999688
some poor millennial intern forced to appeal to zoomers

>>213999672
spring drive is based but I wouldn't buy one

>>213999719
nah yeah and what?

>>213999737
virgin drive

Why are you people overcomplicating this

JBAR (just buy a Rolex)

>>213999743
Gorgeous picture, have had it open in a separate tab for more than a week.

LET'S HEAR IT LADS, ANY NEWS ON THE VERY REAL PAKISTANI GROOMING GANGS?

nah nah yeah nah yeah mate

>>213999737
It's the watch equivalent of a gr yaris
Yes it's an interesting piece of engineering but if you pull up to a girl's house in it and tell her it was nearly £50k she'll just ask why you spent that on a yaris

>>213999763
Your PC has a nonce drive

you don't hear about toshiba much these days

>>213999791
pinkpantheress sexo

I have a nice seiko 5 but my wrists are too skinny for it to look good

*pushes you over*

Your watch okay mate? Don't want you to break something worth a couple of grand

>>213999797
From Ip Man to Slip Man

>>213999808
GR Yaris is also very based but I wouldn't buy one. Toys for rich autists who appreciate those things.

>>213999833
her arse is lovely

I have one of these. dont give a fuck about what people think about me, I just want the time on my wrist.

>>213999862
*smashes it with a crowbar*
nuthin personnel kiddo

>>213999830
bought one of their hard drives last year

>>213999876
Does it tell you how long you've been a virgin for

>>213999892
'

>>213999901
screm

>>213999901
Funnily enough my ex brought it for me

>>213999923
timmy luvs his women masculine

>>213999908
they look like they fuck black men

>>213999923
hnnnng

>>213999876
same
$20 from the warewhare

>>213999791
mental how fit she is

>>213999936
Watch lasted longer than they did

gonna wake up one of these cold mornings and hang myself after my coffee.

big fan of slightly chubby women me

nth for the holodem

>>213999996
just make a better coffee then aha x

>>213999996
You live in the Shire, bro. Just pop outside your hobbit hole

>>214000026
disgusting manly woman, perfect for timmy x

>>213999797
fucking hell

>>214000026
find gym birds extremely grim personally and most of them only go to make their arses big and take selfies

>>214000024
heh x

Lil ziedy begging for attention this morning LOL

>>214000026
>all that to deadlift 3pl8 and bench 70kg

kal-el, no

citing cyber bullying in my suicide note to get some laws changed so no more beautiful young minds full of potential fall victim to cyber attacks and grooming like myself

Why yes, I do lift heavy things.

Impressive, isn't it?

>>214000140
How is cyber bullying real bru just close your eyes bru

New gf is 19, I'm 28. Feels naughty ngl.

>>214000190
bit grim for the both of you. If my son did that I would give him a kick up the arse

I deserve sex

>>214000224
no you don't

>>214000219
Are you a woman?

>>214000190
What's she like

Lidl hat genuine British bacon the other day and I tried it, because Daniel Lord / Hidinginmyroom was complaining how they didn't have this in Japan.

Not bad, but not super great either. I think I prefer the thin slices of Black Forest smoked ham.

>>214000250
she has a big willy

>>214000190
I’m 32 and gf is 21. I’m surprised at how MASSIVE the age gap feels, I do feel like a nonce sometimes.

>>214000190
corr legal noncery

Couch locked except to my computer
Can someone alt-f4 for me

>>214000250
she's actually 14

>>214000250
Doomer recluse. Slavic/Middle Eastern. Very pleasant personality.

>>214000285
>couch
FOY

>>214000288
CORRR

I could destroy any man on /brit/, it would be less combat than dominant sweaty gay anal prison rape

>>214000294
>Slavic/Middle Eastern
She told you if she wants kids yet?

When i see grown men with gfs in their late teens I just think the guy is mentally immature. Young people are retarded and I can barely last 10 mins talking with them

>>214000241
um yes I do as it happens

PHWOAR

>>214000352
>I can barely last 10 mins talking with them
Now imagine how they feel

>>214000352
teens are well fit thoughbeit

>>214000269
I get you lad. Lifes too short to live based on others moral qualms or judgements. I've dated women my age and been ghosted, cheated on, etc. Cant deny I have more fun with younger women due to my own immaturity and underdeveloped life

>>214000334
haha alri mr president

>>214000362
the boring autist starter pack

Rugby season nearly over lads
Don't know whether to go back to poonion over winter as I feel in great shape at the minute but I'm too used to league now, probably get sent off inside 5 mins for a late swinging arm

current gf is 2 years older than me lol
it's actually alright because i prefer millenial culture

>>214000362
rorke's go to meal deal

>>214000362
For me it's the Tuna Crunch Sub, Boiled Eggs with Mayo, and a San Pellegrino Limonata

>>214000352
Yes I am mentally immature, I havent surrendered my sense of wonder and innocence to the humdrum of early middle age life yet. Perhaps I never will.

how do so many daytime /brit/ posters have gfs
thought we were all neet incels with suicidal tendencies
made this place feel like a community before the normoids came in with their bradleyposting at 5pm

>>214000406
Retard there's no generational difference with a 2 year age gap fucking idiot mong twat

who was the lad who said he went to waitrose twice a day for free coffee

>>214000451
yeah there is because i'm zillenial
literally, anyone a little bit older is more millenial and anyone a little bit younger is more zoomer
it's just how it is as a zillenial

>>214000376
I need you to understand that you are one of the many modern zombies, barely human, a slave to sinful feelings. I am a real man, I care more about what is appropriate and moral than what feel le good ugh im gonna le bust a fat nut american pornstar style xD.

its sad a great man like me shares this beautiful green earth with modern zombies like you who destroy everything sacred and worth loving. Young women, and women in general, have become so overly sexualised it disgusts me. this whole world disgusts me

>>214000352
Please be honest - are you a woman?

>>214000440
wonder and innocence is not immature, its eternal. Being able to regulate emotions and live by moral codes and know your values is mature

I want to cum on Emma Watson’s poo.

Any cerebral man in? Any towering intellects about?

>>214000480
>I am a real man, I care more about what is appropriate and moral
So countless man before 1990 were not real men? Mad that desu.

chatgpt is such a redditor

>>214000521
i only read the bible

>>214000447
>>>/r9k/

>are you a woman be honest
>young women ugh sexy
>women women women
>women.webm
>emma watson poo fart
>lol ur a virgin xD
>just had a wank
>porn porn porn!

>>214000521
Have seen her lick toilets.

my second poo of the day is nearly always the biggest. i feel a stone lighter

>>214000480
You're a fat gay incel acne and a patchy pube beard

>>214000513
Whats immoral about dating a young woman and treating her with dignity and respect? Guiding her when necessary and enabling her growing independence?

>>214000562
you just got unpacked bruh

>>214000571
me in the photo

>>214000577
We must imagine Sasha Grey happy

imagine spending money on any other watch than this one

Obelisk of the mind,
Swept er' the carpeted sands of Alexander
Mourning tomb of the sun,
Shed thine sandstone light upon this dull age
Craft of wonder and age -
Before I too disappear into your dark womb
Of black night

>>214000570
fomyeg

>>214000447
i'm wfh and shitposting. not all of us are neckbeard incel shut-in dole scum like you laddy.

>>214000562
Because it's a probability model designed and built by redditors. It picks words using probability weighted by values set by reddit mongs

>>214000629
omega spergmaster

>>214000545
contrary to pedo revisionist history, most men DID date/marry women of similar age to themselves.

>>214000610
it was supposed to give me a screencap for a funny bait thread

>>214000635
>neckbeard incel shut-in dole scum
ktim

once shagged a girl that looked like a white pinkpantheress
one of the top 3 hottest girls I've shagged but I did a bad job so never shagged her again

>>214000664
who asked?

>>214000664
what she looked peter sellers? i don't understand

>>214000629
Wrong speedmaster

>>214000562
you are so dumb

>>214000664
Pinkpantheress isn't very good looking thoughbeit

"We both spend all day indoors, but I get to work all day instead of playing video games"

>>214000697
you’re a fat poor loser

>>214000671
>>214000695
>>214000698
three (You)s in a minute cheers lads

wish i was born back when you could legally duel. I would have slain many a man by now

>>214000629
pitched a project for these chaps the other day. hope we get it, lots of dosh in it. watches are for twats though.

>>214000730
you wouldn’t have done shit pussy

subordinate at work keeps forgetting to do shit and his forgetfulness has now impacted me completing a project so ive grassed on him to his line manager. he needs to get his shit together

>>214000696
>not a moon watch
>VPN
>phone screenshot
respectfully kill yourself

>>214000722
telling on yourself with that projection aren't you
poor thing

>>214000763
Canspaedo!

>>214000760
Maybe his mum's ill mate, ever consider that?

rorkemaster

>>214000730
I reckon I’d put you down clean

>>214000760
>grassed on him to his line manager
Bad form and makes you look like a conniving little toad. Should have given him a call and made him start getting it done ir sorted a day in the office with him

>>214000760
You spoken to him about it?

fizzy cherry raspberry orange lemon limeade

Might open a pub called the Cock and Bull

mental how a man can say what he wants to you and you legally cant smack him in the back of the head as he walks away. Used to be able t kill your husband/wife if you caught them cheating, shit used to make sense

>>214000829
I'll be the cock
*unzips*

Almost completely certain that a lad at my old work invented an entirely fictitious pregnancy within his girlfriend (who was herself real) purely so he could later say his gf miscarried and get time off on compassionate leave, having already used up all his annual leave and taken the piss with his sick leave to the extent he would be fired if he pushed it any further.

99% certain.

might open a pub called the boring bastard

this is my watch
when I make 200k a year I'll get a rolex

>>214000562
he's done you

>>214000848
I'll be the bull
*bends you over*

>>214000768
cope

Might open a pub called the Cock and Balls with a hanging sign featuring the Tottenham Hotspur rooster standing on two balls.

We should all chip in and buy a pub together :)

>>214000817
this had better not be a man

>>214000562
Irish have white (or even ginger, the whitest among the white races) skin, but they are functionally Googles.

>>214000447
half of /brit/ is also on 6 figure salaries too if you believe what is posted here

>>214000890
gay pub

The shaggers' fit

>>214000820
>>214000826
ive obviously reminded him about it. multiple times in fact. so now it needs escalating. which is entirely appropriate
i wouldnt just go straight to his manager. this is also one instance of many.

reverse the roles

>>214000856
Insensitive prick, he's lost his child and there you are accusing him of being a liar

/brit/ocracy

I’d name my pub Dave’s Folly, both because it’d be a bad financial decision, and after the architectural feature. Love a good pun, me :)

on 7 figures me

learned to make yummy prawn toast
it's good because prawn toast is expensive from the chinese
it's bad because now I have to fight the urge to live on it

>>214000872
*teleports behind you*
*bends you over instead*
pshhhh... nothin personell.... kid

>>214000890
The Laughing Gameshow Host

>>214000856
girl who used to work for me had two miscarriages in the space of 3 or 4 months which is obviously rather suspicious. not even sure it's biologically possible but i wasn't going to go accusing so just gave her the time off she asked for.

>>214000933
Of what, your weight?

>>214000904
Free drinks for lads in skirts or dresses

>>214000695
yeah a little chinese fella burst in while they were shagging and tried to karate chop him

niggers swinging their bbcs around like helicopters and achieving liftoff

REALLY want to quit my job but then i'd have to get another one and it'd just be a whole ordeal
wish i were schizophrenic so i could just get on bennies

on 10 figures

fartign

lab ache lore
or
bachelor ale
or
holy carol
or
cry halloo

>>214000760
bet he was born after 2000
zoomers are utterly useless at toil regardless of job

>>214000998
my nine figures

>>214000983
for seconds without a shag

Filling the loft with foam spray in anticipation for winter

I am on 10 figures but I will die soon and it troubles me that I can't control that no matter how much money I have

>>214000817
don't like how many birds I've matched with on hinge get posted here now

https://desuarchive.org/int/thread/194766576/#194767450

>>214001005
corpsing to this

>>214001013
Do you have kids who will inherit the fortune? If not: Shame.

>>214000921
Nah it was definitely made up. He also appeared as a witness in a murder trial for one of his mates and though I'd like to think he was honest there, I don't know. When we moved to WFH during covid he got the sack after 6 months for being drunk and on gear all day.

He was an intelligent and not unpleasant guy, he just didn't take anything seriously. To him, anything that could be got away with should be attempted. I wouldn't be surprised to learn he's in prison or dead.

turt here
how's it foing boys

niggers using their bbcs to pole vault and soaring through the sky

>>214000190
saw a teen at a counter that looked like a vtuber(pic related), gen alphas are so lucky. they'll be surrounded by 2.5D peng tings soon enough

lass was pale, blue eyes, black hair with a dyed blue stripe. she had a cute smile too

>>214001032
No I dedicated my life to making money instead

>>214000934
do you just cook prawns and then mash them into some hovis

>>214001054
try making some good posts haha x

>>214001034
Has he also been the lead suspect in a detective novel, christ alive

>>214001049
kill yourself

>>214000949
that's why it's such a good play

to even begin to question such a thing and ask for evidence is so insensitive that saying you had a miscarriage is always going to be accepted

reckon girls are posting my hinge profile on the girl version of 4chan

that's rorke done

do michelin still award stars to non-vegan restaurants?

>>214001054
To what end, then. What is even the point with no one to care about your little high score.

>>214001070
ah my apologies I will get on to that right away. poo smells how it foing bradley walsh

>>214001082
>Baby girl
Give it a few years mate

>>214001084
why do you care not like you could ever afford to visit one

>>214001082
blud looks like he's about to direct The Shining

>>214001099
Great stuff

>>214001082
LOL how about mum

>>214001082
wasians can never be english

we need to establish a wasian ethnostate

>>214001082
I look like Big Steve yet oddly I do not shag

>>214001082
>I'm british because I'm white
seems rorke would agree with this one mate

>>214001082
just an absolutely horrific post all around, every word makes it even worse. what is wrong with women

>>214001084
will be asking gary eats about this

>>214001084
there's only one 3 michelin star vegan 'aurant and they recently announced they're serving meet again lel

Called Eleven Madison Park in NYC

i'd shag a fit tranny

>>214001081
you mean the site that's practically dead in the water and gets like 1 post a week

Rorke we will import more brown people into our country whether you like it or not so shut up

>>214001121
i look like smoll henry cavill

keanu reeves is english

>>214001145
crumblign

>>214000894
no worries x

>>214001017
HUH? she lives in japan. she streams from time to time

https://twitch.tv/rinuyii/

>>214001119
they already have central asia

>>214001150
you look like reynhard sinaga nigga

>>214001172
dunelm

>>214001127
go ask your mother

>>214000920
Canspaedo!!

>>214001144
haven't an idea what site you are referring to cuzzie

watching a woman on Twitch and you'd never guess what my left hand is doing right now

>>214001143
it's the voice that kills it for me
even the ones that 100% pass as a fit girl still sound like a raspy voiced poof

>>214001170
and Turkey
and Vancouver

>>214001185
IT'S OVER

>>214001207
wtf

>>214001207
DESGOSTANN

>>214001082
this is why it's wrong for minorities to try to appeal to or appease the right
the right will never accept us

took all my strength not to tell a lady she was dressed like shrek today as she was dressed in green with a brown cardigan. Working on not saying the things that get me in trouble

i think that if you differ in any way from cisgendered heterosexuality then you should be institutionalised and experimented on with electricity

>>214001143
in theory i’d find it hot to fuck an attractive tranny with a really small cock. just the ultimate form of domination isn’t it

>>214001207
delete this shit

>>214001224
IT WUS WANAYOOS

>>214001165
Someone using fake pics on a dating app and then anon is amazed he matched them

>>214001165
she used to be "homeless" and travel around europe just staying in airbnbs or something, it was strange

her mum is Romanian, she only moved to Japan earlier this year. that was before she started twitch, like if you look at that archived thread it was hard to find her pics last year

>>214001240
i love playing with their balls

top 10 philosophers

1) Ludwig Wittgenstein
2) Friedrich Hayek
3) Larry Wright
4) Charles Darwin
5) Thomas Kuhn
6) David Hull
7) Walter Weimer
8) W. W. Bartley
9) Gerald Edelman
10) Knud Haakonssen

>>214001071
He was a weird combination of charming, intelligent and yet also obviously from a low-class background. He wasn't even trying to 'make it', like he wasn't working that job with the rest of us because he wanted to do something with his life, it was more like it was just easy for him because he could survive on his wits and it paid reasonably well, then he could pour all that money into drugs and alcohol.

It was like if you plucked someone from a council estate and dumped them in a Wall Street job except he had no ambition of climbing the ladder. He was content to turn up as little as possible, do as little work as possible while remaining unsacked, alongside white collar dweebs then go home and destroy his brain with alcohol.

anti semites are ruining america

stirring my dinner around with my fork without eating it like tony soprano always did

>>214001274
Kant mogs them. End of

>>214001270
i don’t think i could ever bring myself to actually do it though, too afraid of the post nut clarity

>>214001274
kant man through and through me

You’re all great people and I’m glad I post here

>>214001263
she literally still follows on me the ol 'stagram, but cope on lad x

>>214001294
all actors do this during scenes with food for continuity reasons x

>>214001299
>>214001309
kantmongs love their kant

>>214001294
you are literally him

>>214001229
What minority are you?

>>214001294
think they do that because they have to do multiple takes and if you take real bites you'd be eating 2-3 meals' worth per scene

>>214001056
na you blitz em with different seasonings into a paste and then stick it on hovis raw
they cook while you're deep frying it

Please consider supporting the Australian Peter Singer industry

>>214001334
i still have all my hair though
>>214001326
>>214001341
in the case of tony i think it was actually supposed to be part of his character

Adolf "1488" Hitler
Adolf "Based" Hitler
Adolf "Esoteric" Hitler
Adolf "National" Hitler
Adolf "Faustian" Hitler
Adolf "Nietzschean" Hitler
Adolf "Exterminationist" Hitler

>>214001275
The miscarriage must have hit him hard then

>>214001336
my parents are moroccan but i am not muslim in case you're wondering

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

>>214000571
genuinely what I look like when im fucking... WANNNNNNNKINNNNNNG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ofcom worker just clocked in I see

>>214001207
soooooooooooooo fit xx

>>214001354
might try this but then realistically I likely never will

>>214001165
>check out my wishlist to support me
hmmmmmm fuck off grifter slag

>>214001358
Ironic considering the actor did a Mr Creosote

Would like to say what I really think about Kant and what I think he is but this is a blue board

am partial to a spot of Kierkegaard

>M&S sending my order of 2 small items across 2 parcels sent by 2 different courier companies

mate it's the big 25 of course I want all the items in one fucking parcel I don't want 2 separate parcels fucks sake no wonder they got hacked

>>214001361
nietzsche was an incel who died of syphilis from shagging male prostitutes

How many would you actually fuck sacked tranny given the chance?

>>214001378
>AHHHHHHHH THIS FUCKING CIVVIE JUST ORDERED SOME FOOD AND NOW I HAVE TO MAKE IT AHHHHHHHHHHHH HELP ME

>>214001378
me trying to do 1 portion of scrambled eggs

>>214001397
good choice

>>214001374
you can probably blend in with whites if you change your name to Carlos or Giuseppe

whiteness/europeanness is defined by christianity/not being muslim

>>214001418
would rather savagely beat him with a metal pipe tbqh

>>214001418
If I didn't have to meet him again then probably once just to put my willer inside something

>>214001418
honestly probably a nonzero number

mental

>>214001397
gaards you from getting any fanny as well

>>214001433
He understood me. I am very similar to him

>>214001397
>>214001433
not a good philosopher, you only like him because he’s the only notable existentialist christcuck

>>214001455
um

hegel is the best

>>214001268
>>214001324
did you ever meet then?

reminder to report BE flags posts

click
click
haha
funny
click
click

>>214001465
kek tim

>>214001484
>hegel
incomprehensible garbage

>>214001418
he's never posted a timestamped image so none of us know what he looks like. If you ask him to he dodges the question. Make of that what you will.

there's no evidence whatsoever that the above tank top picture is him, neither the oft-posted blurry image of a random ALDI worker

>>214001509
>>214001509
>>214001509

>>214001502
me browsing /brit/

>>214001397
same but his books are hard reads

>>214001481
he's the father of the genre

squeeze, click, release squeeze click, release

>>214001484
The man who invented the Rorke vs Leftypol gimmick

>>214001481
go on then. refute him

>>214001465
What a runt

>>214001481
Americans cannot understand poetic philosophy. Stick to Ayn Rand

>>214001465
*hops up and down screaming KTIM KTIM KTIM*

>>214001488
nah she was moving around too much and by then I had already moved on, just remember her because it was weird that she looked very instagram like but could not find fuck all about her at the time kek

weirdly I remember my opener was "do you have a leash to go with that collar?" or something and she matched and replied something kinky but can't remember what

>>214001637
fuarks sake lad, I would've went cross country

>>214001783
not a big fan of the Japanese girl style desu

Koreans and Chinese are much more fit to me x

>>214002100
should've copped the jp ting still bruv