Thread 214037338

pub garden edish

why are zoomers aging like utter dogshit?

>>214037382
that's the kid's mum.... right? haha

the only tangible difference between a normalfag sexhaver and an incel is that the normalfag isn’t dismayed by failure/the thought of it

He's got hair dye on the brain

>>214037382
why this bih got a goat

>>214037382
BBC overdose

Never had a wimpy in my life

>>214037426
To give to her 50 year fiancé Muhammad

I know a 26 year old that buys physical newspapers daily basically LARPing as his idea of an "adult" even though he's a trust fund babby that's never worked a day in his life

Oh no no no mathsbros...are we finally cooked?

really need to bang davina mccall

>>214037468
*Patrick voice* TWO PLUS TWO IS FOUR

my friend told me that when he lost his virginity his foreskin didn't go back to normal for a few days. i didn't really know what he meant.

>>214037468
Shut the fuck up Heathermong nobody cares

>>214037468
don’t know if people are generating tweets with gpt or theyre starting to talk like it and take on the same tone because they use it so much

>>214037465
That man's name? Albert Einstein.

>>214037468
lmao of course a stochastic parrot is going to spit out crud that fools imbeciles like you. bubeck is a total fraud by the way and an oai shill to boot.

Snogging a can of Red Bull

>>214037472
every
single
time

>>214037488
Davina McCall
Former heroin addict
Sucked Eric Clapton off in the booth while he was recording a take of Tears in Heaven, a song about his dead son

>>214037488
Absolute MILF

>>214037465
He sounds based, you sound like a whingeing virgi

>>214037468
>math
FOY and immediately ignored
It's mathematics/maths
NEXT!

im such a fucking freak it never even began for me

I wonder if any of the passengers on the planes on 9/11 made humourous Warner Brothers-style quips about their impending demise

>AI did thing!!!
yeah meanwhile Mousey created a new form of science involving a Pot Noodle soy sauce sachet and crocodile clips several months ago but everyone ignored him.

sucking a stochastic parrot

Funny what sets heathermong off

Sir Stochastic Parroter

miss turning 16 and watching the retards leave to learn "trades" only to crop up a few weeks later on the tills at morrisons

LAVELY FACKIN NOSH

ChatGPT makes incels seethe so hard for some reason

showing mummy the captain underpants section at the stochastic book fair

>>214037673
How many girls compete for that prize? Can't be many

>>214037676
corrr

>>214037538
yeah
do love me mature women

>>214037468
it's bullshit
the 1.5/L result was proved earlier this year so it doubtlessly just regurgitated the results of the paper from its training data

I hate lube it gets everywhere and smells afterward

>>214037680
Usually it’s computer science codemonkeys and furry hentai artists who are just mad their bullshit jobs are being automated and can’t handle it

>>214037673
Meanwhile they don't remember you at all
The kid with no mates who ended up growing pale and old, blogposting on 4chan
They'd knock you spark out and end your life without a second thought if you said a word to them

mmm very earthy post that one

eating disgusting expired pesto

>>214037538
Ah that’s why she’s some weird fitness freak
just trying to chase the high

>>214037622
some scientists are just so far ahead that they aren't appreciated until a century after their death

>>214037726
yeah but im middle class an have an inheritance so

>>214037722
yeah tastes crap too even the flavoured ones
love sucking bfberg off after he rams my arse but the lube just ruins the flavours of my own juice

>>214037726
angry trog

>>214037726
obliterated that stochastic parrot

>>214037538
corrrr and I mean CORRRRRR

There was a bloke who got gangraped by a group of lads at the school I went to and he ended up becoming a tranny. I honestly believe that experience destroyed his brain and made him gay which is really sad honestly, maybe it was his way of being okay with the trauma, he was "gay anyway" or something. Wonder if that happens a lot in these cases

>>214037761
I was just on about wanking.
You’re weird.

Not sure what to have for tea, lads.

>>214037771
didnt happen though did it

>>214037776
never found the need to wank with lube personally, my knob produces enough lovely squelchy precum of its own

>>214037805
Init

>>214037812
squelching

pulverise niggers with orbital bombardments

>>214037595
wonder what his chess rating is

>>214037792
Might have some mince boiled in Dolmio, feel like something authentically Italian you see

foraging for mushrooms in my incel cavern and drinking the drip water I've been collecting using tarps

>>214037817
Mine don’t

>>214037771
Nah that would have been national news mate, reel your larps in just a tad

>>214037817
You’re missing out lad. I’ve been getting some nice lubey handjobs from my gf and they’ve been mind blowing. Takes it to another level.

was like an excited labradoodle to start my new job at first, 3 months later and i'm thinking of ways to maim myself so that i don't have to do it anymore

>>214037805
did though, didn't it

>>214037812
scuba diving

>>214037812
wonder what his chess rating is

>>214037874
didnt happen though did it

>>214037771
That never uh happened did it Homer?

>>214037874
You’ve never had a girlfriend.

activate the rorke protocol

Jsut use coconout oil for wanks and sex desu

>>214037874
Rorke that's not your girlfriend, that's your nan!

>>214037934
HOOTING

>>214037812
flapping and craning my neck

>>214037897
>>214037912
Project on, incels

>>214037934
Cor and I mean cor

>>214037930
That’s how u get mold growing on your dick

Teenagers are out of control now. They walk around with impunity. A group cycled past me earlier and slapped an egg right across the back of my head and laughed. Is Reform planning on doing something about this?

What is it with southerners just losing all perception of others when they're in a northern town

been replacing 4chan posting with learning guitar and watching youtube videos

alri bunch of queers in /brit/ leaping out to defend a tranny now
mental how bad this general is

>>214038006
any pleasant little melodies?

>>214037990
he's fucking done you

being middle-upper class is the modern age white-mans-burden desu

>>214037970
Tell us some more imaginary sex stories mister shagger

>>214038006
i find youtube is just a mind numbing

alri bunch of queers in /brit/ leaping out to defend a tranny now
mental how bad this general is

still didn't happen though mate

silksong on 4 september ladas

ahah just pretend everything's alright until i shatter fully into unrepairable pieces x

>>214038041
yea it is less negativity though

>>214037978
It's antimicrobial though
Never had a problem

Poo shitey arse

>>214038042
>>214038057
my post number's 214038010

I've put the heating on. It's fucking August and I've got the heating on.

this is my gay nigger dance

>>214037990
yeah with their tamagotchis and their fidget spinners, its a jungle out there

>>214038115
screaming

>>214038113
No need

>>214038027
Yeah funny that mate go around slapping people with eggs and I think you'll find you'll do everyone.

en mi vida el oscuro me mantiene cuando yo te vi en la lluvia me prometistes tu sangre

rorke throwing some gay porn moves on the gay porn dancefloor

>>214038113
u live in shetties too?

>>214038126
No need for it to be this cold yeah

>>214038072
alright humpty dumpty

>>214038137
Can't make hide nor hair of this post

>>214038036
Thanks for making me feel better about myself lad, didn’t expect getting wanked off by my gf to be dismissed as a crazy shagger story x

How many times do you do other lads on average per day

deploying my incel siege engines

>>214037435
Black-Boy-Clitty overdose

>>214038161
Runtish worm

>>214038188
get the bloody mangonels set up

Not even 11am and I want a beer

Think I'm an alcoholic

don't see the point in getting wanked off, can do that myself

mumberg.. dadstein... im a yummy tummy funny lucky gummy bear.... oh yah

cleanerberg just left. house is lovely and sparkly. sofa cushions all plumped, floors mopped, surfaces gleaming. luvverly.

my post number's 214038010

any fellow doggers in? took mine out earlier to avoid the heat

>>214038230
Feels way better when someone else does it especially a woman and she can put her tits in your face and tell you you're a good boy while plating with your hair

When the blinds are shut and the door is locked, Rorke gets zesty
https://youtu.be/O6dNaLa_OwM

>>214038241
how much did that cost you lad?

>>214038248
My parents love dogging, they have a labrador

>>214038230
Getting a handjob is much better than wanking yourself. I’m the lad whose gf gives him lubey handjobs and I’m not exaggerating, it almost feels as good as a blowjob.

rorke shaking his raisin

>>214038271
>especially a woman and she can put her tits in your face and tell you you're a good boy while plating with your hair
How fucking tall is this woman? Or, how fucking short are you?

>>214038063
ok i will buy it

>>214038248
Yeah went for 5k with my two they loved it

>>214038302
no one told me rorke got moves??

>>214038286
>it almost feels as good as a blowjob.
Just get her to suck you off then? Don't see the point in having someting "almost" as good

Good luck cumming if someone else is giving you a handjob. I always have to end up doing it myself just to finish because she can't get the grip right. She always pulls back my foreskin too even though I tell her not too. Stupid bint.

>>214038063
yesss yess fuck yes

Rorke, who has been telling his son all his life to do well in school so he doesn't end up like him, now telling his son that GCSEs aren't everything in life after Rorke Jr got 0 A*-Cs

>>214038302
wonder what his chess rating is

There isn't a single man who drives a tesla that I couldn't kick the fuck out of

>>214038364
thank you for supporting the australian computer game industry

Just heard an orchestra hit sound effect outside

>>214038344
Sounds like a problem with your knob

it is over

>>214038279
i get them to do 3 hours a week, think they're £17 an hour.

>>214038375
*Puts my hand on your forehead while I chuckle softly as you try to punch me*

>>214038401
Ever shag them?

>>214038431
no that just covers the cleaning

>kick the fuck out of
Hate this saying. Always the simpleton jocks who say it. Should've just cut them loose when we had the chance. Useless cunts.

Isn't this like really bad
the girl in the pic is ukranian or police or something

>>214038451
not really a saying
more a phrase

>meant to be working
>but the great british menu is on
WHY ARE COOKING SHOWS SO ADDICTIVE I DONT EVNE LIKE COOKING

>>214038401
Damn maybe I should hire cleaners

Must be embarrassing as fuck having cleaners round while you just sit there on your fat arse as they clean around you. Do people have no shame anymore?

>>214038467
White working class bros, the zoomers have failed us

>>214037468
does not matter

>>214038487
i do find it very awkward lol

>>214038451
weird little english mong

>>214038411
I'm 6'3 and 17 stone lad, good luck

Triforce achieved

>>214038519
what about when they need to clean the area you're sitting in? do you just get up and move for a bit?

>>214038540
leave the room innit
to go neet in the sitting room

When im gaming i slide around on the chair so the cleaner can clean around me

Anyone who can't clean up after themselves should not be allowed access to the NHS.

I got the key to the city
Twitter at me, it's @Bladeecity

only weird terminally online freaks care about any divide between scotland and england
except of course glaswegians who frankly should just get over it

>>214038241
does your mum ask you to watch them and make sure they're not nicking?

Doing that thing where you catch one of every Pokemon and keep them all in the PC as a collection
It's pretty fun, gives me an excuse to go back and play all the games I had as a kid. Been doing it about a year and I'm almost done with the 4th generation games.

Hope you don't mind my blogging, it's just I've not really got any mates x

>>214038573
Ok

>>214038484
it's money well spent if you ask me, i fucking hate cleaning. feels like i basically buy a bunch of free time at the weekend cos everything's already done. highly recommend it.

The sushi missus moments before getting BBC bred

>>214038487
I usually hide under the covers from the window cleaner but once I forgot the curtains and window were opened. He asked me calmly if I could come over and close the window so he could clean it. Mortified

Diego's going to be amazing this week
Just a feeling I have (he was fucking dogshit last week)!!

>>214038573
ok

really fancy a full english for dinner

right well that’s the lustful libertines wanked to isn’t it

>>214038576
i don’t care about english people and find the weird victim complex so many online scots to have about them baffling

i hate westminster and the tories and labour but so do most of the country. I will however always laugh when the English football team lose because a I’m not English and it’s a friendly sports rivalry, and B because the media complex surrounding them and all the pundits and such are wankers and it’s funny watching their little hearts break every tournament

>>214038573
So decrees King Runt

>>214038626
how was he dogshit last week?

>>214038610
>>214038627
>>214038645
Fat cunts

>>214038487
i'm working, they just clean everywhere else then i leave my desk and go sit in the lounge while they do this bit.

>>214038648
Dog ate him the week before

I heard middle class cunts clean the house before their maids come so they don't seem as runtish as they really are

>>214038648
alri deegz

oh look we're on to the daily fat hate portion /brit/ today. Just let it go you lanky cunts the future is catered to us. i WILL be taking up a NHS bed when I am entitled to and you WILL be forced to wait until I am discharged.

>>214038665
Ok

>>214038680
psc

>>214038573
he says from his smeggy sheets in his smelly bedroom

>>214038680
poosc

Got places on my Uber Eats that are an hour drive away

>>214038693
My mum makes me pre tidy before the big tidy we do every Sunday morning. Bizarre behaviour of you ask me. Why not do it all in one go?

why is this the only general that doesn't post anime girls

>>214038693
middle class people don’t have maids

*pushes the auto-wank button on my bariatric gaming chair*

>Bournemouth: The seaside town 'changed' by immigration - where non- British-born population rose nearly 50%
https://news.sky.com/story/bournemouth-the-seaside-town-changed-by-immigration-where-non-british-born-population-rose-nearly-50-13414657

Mad didn't know there were so many bames in Bournemouth, but why Bournemouth? Is there a university nearby?

I hate Rogue One so much but I'm banned from /tv/ for another two days.

>>214038703
not the only thing being catered to you is it, tubster?

>>214038693
i do tidy up for them tbf but that's cos putting stuff away is easy, i want their time to be spent on the annoying stuff that takes me ages and i don't want to do

>>214038751
What are you watching

>>214038736
can't imagine needing a "big tidy" every week, surely once it's under control you can just do that every few months

>>214038736
>big tidy every sunday morning
hate mumberg for this. often im lying in bed near death after a night out and she’s hoovering and shouting and calling me lazy and useless

No one will believe me however, this today I have eaten:
>one bowl of frostys
>5 asda jam donuts
>2 white chocolate and strawberry muffins
>1 14" cheese pizza
>2 cans of pepsi
Still hungry

>>214038771
you know what fancy a bit of mia melano

>>214038790
You should make one of those ragebait tiktoks

>>214038762
That's him rolled down a hill

Getting wanked off is always shit. I've never finished from it and just get bored while her hand gets sore/tired.

>>214038790
only ate a bowl of porridge me

>>214038805
she looks like a tranny desu

They are too mean to Scully in the x files

imagine wasting your one life being fat
what a retarded decision

>>214038831
She really doesn't

desu

Remember a little lad in our year getting pinned down at school once (all boys school) and the horse play got a little over exuberant and what went from a bit of a struggle very quickly ended up his trousers and boxers off his rear and the tip of a lucozade sport bottle penetratively inserted into his rectum for a fleeting moment.

>>214038858
she has a man face and is like 6'2

>>214038805
Based

bender nonce fantasy hour is it

Going out for a walk. Big step for me as I have mental health

>>214038917
Why, you got something to share?

>>214038884
so glad i’m not an english middle class weirdo like this who goes to an all boys
i was the smallest lad in my year up until 16 and the worst thing that happened to me was standard teasing and getting the shit kicked out me in PE. none of this gay arse rape stuff. even by 16 I had mostly hit a growth spurt and the other kids had grown out of bullying (all the chavs/neds had left)

>>214038895
Bizarre timmy cope

>>214038943
Crumpled that nonce up like paper and threw him into the bin

your social hierarchy in school was mostly decided by when you hit puberty
if you’re physiologically 15 when everyone else is 13 that’s a big advantage. or if everyone else is 17/18 and you’re still roughly at the development of a 15 year old it has a massive impact

>>214038947
i grre up in glasgiw and there was lits of gay stuff at school

>>214038947
All boys was class mate, there was an all girls school down the road anyway so it just meant you'd get to spend all day fucking around with the lads and then go to their parties at the weekends

smallest in our year was a genuine dwarf named Bruno
biggest was some girl we called green giant (our school blazers were green)
she was like 6ft in year 7

>>214039032
>drunk already
yeah we can tell you're from glasgow

>>214038815
It’s very comforting while cuddling
If she’s any good, not common, then it’s a pretty nice time

>>214039050
and they ended up getting married and living happily ever after :)

>>214038884
>>214039038
JH?

>>214038947
Nowt wrong with a cheeky fondle is there?

>>214039024
If you weren't a big chad you had to be funny

>>214038738
sorry, only whites allowed

>>214039080
i'd rather a slow tease and just played with for a bit than having her do the mashed potato on me.

>england invades scotland
>scots start insisting it was always called glasgiw

Once had a lad who was known for having a big willy sat next to me, think he was high and kept saying he was horny and I assume rubbing his cock through his trousers. At one point he went to stand up and another lad told him to rub his willy in my face. He never did it but didn't know what to make of it and never told anyone

I'm at the pube

>>214038815
all about the psychology for me. the moment i get the sense she's just doing it for my benefit and is getting tired i'm out. a slow one that feels like it could go on forever will do a much better job for me.

>>214039178
*glesgae
or glesca

>>214039196
When was this, last week?

>>214039196
That's lad's name? Albert Bigwilly.

funny how i can go to the gym and fool myself into thinking im being productive when im being lazy the rest of the day

why is Charli XCX such a dirty fucking whore lads? im in the middle of a goon sesh

how are you lads booking escorts now that adultwork requires age verification?

>>214039242
No at school a decade ago

What's gonna happen in September lads? There's a big right wing rally in London.

how fucking peng is garlic bread lads

>>214039283
imagine if she pooed on the windscreen

>>214039239
Yeah I think you're right, the passion or desire and/or if it was a paid professional then it would probably be great. Like that Lilu girl. But fat chance most people are getting one that good.
Might as well just shag if you're with a gf or someone like that.

>>214039301
it's gonna be biblical

>>214039301
It's organised by Tommy Rubeinstein and will be horrifically cringeworthy, chaotic, stupid things will be said and there will be violence. Anything that man touches takes serious discussion back. Avoid it.

>>214039317
cor

please let me look at the video game boobies sir keir

Really really grim how the people that once conquered the world are now reduced raising their own flag in their ancestral home as an act of civil disobedience

No empire is eternal. Although we did seed two continents so our legacy will live on.

dont like the ideas of lads having a wank while posting here. Don't need to knwo you've got your willy in your hand

>>214037382
>GCSE age
Paper round on the north sentinel island was it?

>>214039323
imagined

>>214039337
mad how im scranning some right this instant and you're not

>>214039381
puttering

seeding a continent

>>214039393
*rapes you to shreds and steals your garlic bread*
yeah?

>>214039391
feel a bit horny now haha

Any lads supping right now

>>214039415
well that wasnt very nice was it

might watch a film
maybe gran torino

Hollow Knight is very overrated tbhonest

>>214039423
supping a bosom

>>214039437
ziedy ahhh post

the weight of my katana

>>214039470
Where is lil ziedy, hardly see him nowadays

>>214039378
gor my willy in my hand rn ama

>>214039351
It's painful. Do we even still have a chance?

Looking at images of pre-WW2 London makes me want to cry. Almost entirely White, a true imperial capital.

We've lost so much already. Why didn't people fight back when mass immigration began? I hate that I was born in the 1990s. Genuinely feels apocalyptic.

I want to go outside and see beautiful blondes everywhere. This country is physically painful to live in. If nothing changes then by the time I'm old this country will be minority non-White.

Also the White race everywhere is in peril. Don't think you can escape.

just going to take some rubbish out to the bin. dont have too much fun without me ahah x

Fighting the urge to post high quality webm of Mia Melano getting stretched while bouncing on BBC

>>214039500
When even Ziedbelg barely comes here anymore and you’re still here every day you know you’re so fucked

>>214039522
why do you keep posting the same thing you boring wanker

>>214039351
australia is and always has been an irish colony

>>214039552
It's 2016mong

>>214039500
got bullied out of the thread

you lot leave the teabag in/
i do coz i like my tea a bit stronger x

>>214039500
he came out to us all and went outside to find some big black willies to nosh

My parents are still so bluepilled on race it's unreal. I make mildly pro-White statements and they say "don't say that". How can anyone look at the shithole that is Britain and not think non-whites are a biological infestation? I swear boomers are fucking HOPELESS. Completely hopeless cunts raised on WW2 myths.

Maybe it's because I work in an area with lots of non-Whites that I see how bad it has gotten. It's ridiculous that these blobs of meat exist in this country. The elites are absolutely DEAD SET on wiping out the White race.

>>214039615
I do because I'm lazy

>>214039615
dont drink tea as i'm not a homosexualist

>>214039647
Imagine not having racially aware parents haha state of you

>>214039552
Because I don't really have anyone to talk to IRL about this stuff.

attracted to blood, call me a haemosexual
this a banger or no, lads? What's the feeling?

>>214039615
I'll leave it in unless I'm adding milk and sugar.
It just feels wrong to add them with the bag floating about. Feel like it's going to suck it all up.

>>214039647
mumberg is becoming more and more redpilled but dadmong is a bluepilled spastic still

>>214039522
>. Why didn't people fight back when mass immigration began? I
They did

worship the balls call me sacrilegious
this a banger or no, lads? What's the feeling?

>>214039678
Yeah I know, it's grim.
I want to get involved in politics and I know they'll freak out.

>>214039688
funny in the right situation. which will never come up naturally

>>214039500
Mindraped so bad he can't even keep up his schtick anymore

only drink coffeebergs me x

>>214039678
my dads a chud and my mums a libtard so theyre often at odds with each other its like im in a sitcom lol

At a loss. 28, working admin at a recruiting company. Are there any careers with progression that arent about to get AI raped? I want to study but nothing stands out to me

>>214039756
Just give up mate you'll be dead before you know it either way

>>214039756
prozzie

*in bernie mac voice*
these fools are havin sex with themself

>>214039756
hit the oil rig nigga

GET
THAT
NEW
MADE

>>214039764
No. I have reasons to strive, just clueless.
>>214039766
I am a man
>>214039774
North sea? Do they take no experience?

My dad used to be really redpilled on race but isn't so vocal about it anymore

Occasionally drops a tactical truke about IQ but then says other things that make no sense

>>214039736
Nice one DTFIC, all your effort paid off. I doubted you but you got the job done in the end x

>>214039793
>I have reasons to strive
Such as?

>>214039793
idgaf just get after it

>>214039793
male prozzie for wealthy gay men

>>214039818
Loved ones. Supporting my mother. Gf wants babies one day

>>214039816
Wasn't me who did it thoughever

>>214039811
What would he think of the Cronemverse?

i reckon coming to brit to give life advice is like being a big fat mong giving weight loss tips

>>214039858
Fuck em

ate too much spaghetti and my little tummy hurts >.<

>>214039710
Not hard enough, did they? Aside from Notting Hill in the 1950s, they did FUCKING NOTHING

Most didn't vote for Mosley, or Powell, or the NF, or Tyndall. Fucking useless bastards.

We are paying the karmic debt for declaring war on NS Germany. I firmly believe that. Not even 100 years since 1945 and we are facing obliteration.

The upper class are all useless parasites too. Aside from a few real men like Mosley they let jews kick them out of power.

>>214039876
It's boring, gay, and low effort so probably confusion and despair

>>214039902
scodfling

>>214039918
why does my misfortune amuse you so

>>214039907
What do you do to fight back?

>>214039931
I get fuckin angry.

>>214039902
fucking italians

>>214039954
Where do you direct your anger?

three hundred and thirty seven posts, is it?

>>214039873
Come on don’t be humble, your VPN imposter strategy was masterful

>>214039954
LMAO fuck off back to /britfeel/ you stupid cunt

>>214039984
Wasn't me but believe whatever you want I guess

>>214039992
this 'mick is awful lad

>>214039966
White people

>>214040025
That’s our humble king x

having a chinese tonight my loves

the UK needs more latinos

>>214039982
it is yeah

da new
>>214040047

>>214040047

>>214040047

>>214040043
We have several Venezuelans and Colombians in London and I am not a fan.
They've adopted hoodrat culture instantaneously.