>>214113643 (OP)
I learned Japanese culture specifically to make them as uncomfortable as possible whenever I visit.
Playing Ludwig Van Beethoven's 5th symphony at full blast, C minor ear raping tired Japanese salarymen while I spread my thighs taking at least 4 seats. I take turns staring for a few minutes at everyone in my periphery, mouth full of pistachios which I spit on the train floor. I jump the train barriers instead of taking a queue, I climb the stairs to the right, intentionally bumping into as much people as possible, I take the right line, because I know it's where people who are not in a hurry take, I have done my research.
When I reached the Tokyo crossing, I saw a black guy walking opposite to me on the sea of short black haired craniums, a fellow African on his own conquest of sorts, I raise my hand instinctively, he eyes me, sniggers and waves back. Two giants saluting in a sea of a collective Asian hivemind.
I, of course, litter everywhere, I pick the same girl I know from my first internship in Tokyo U everyday to be my tour guide, she speaks in broken english. I parade her around town or is it the other way around? Other vulgar Gaijin give me a knowing look, I nod back.
I deliberately eat in the most rude odious manner possible, I open the chopsticks with my elbows at sharp angles, making horrible moaning sounds the moment the two wooden stick separate. My slurping noise dwarfs the sound of cicadas, I call and point random women in the street, I ask them to take my picture, or give me their number, sometimes I just stare blankly at their planar visage until they feel sufficiently unnerved and hurriedly scurry about whatever way they were headed, sometimes I follow them just to put God's fear in them.
Even Japan's most remote locations have not been spared my gaijin wrath, the monkeys in Yakushima teach their young about my annual pilgrimage. I smirk surreptitiously whenever I'm accused of being an uncivilized American.
Japan is my playground.