Thread 214497262

and in a little while the servant came back, white and trembling, and said, Master, just now when I was in the marketplace I was jostled by a woman in the crowd and when I turned I saw it was Death that had jostled me. She looked at me and made a threatening gesture; now, lend me your horse, and I will ride away from this city and avoid my fate. I will go to Samarra and there Death will not find me. The merchant lent him his horse, and the servant mounted it, and he dug his spurs in its flanks and as fast as the horse could gallop he went.

Later the merchant went down to the marketplace and he saw Death standing in the crowd and he went to her and said, Why did you make a threatening gesture to my servant
and scare him so? That was not a threatening gesture, she said, it was only a start of surprise. I was astonished to see him in Baghdad, for I have an appointment with him tonight in Samarra.

There once was a man from Nantucket, with a dick so long he could suck it. He said, with a grin, as he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it."

A 16-year-old boy worked on his grandfather's horse farm. One morning he drove a pickup truck into town on an errand. While he was walking along the main street, he saw Death. Death beckoned to him.

The boy drove back to the farm as fast as he could and told his grandfather what had happened. "Give me the truck," he begged. "I'll go to the city. He'll never find me there."

His grand father gave him the truck, and the boy sped away. After he left, his grandfather went into town looking for Death. When he found him, he asked, "Why did you frighten my grandson that way? He is only 16. He is too young to die."

"I am sorry about that," said Death. "I did not mean to beckon to him. But I was surprised to see him here. You see, I have an appointment with him this afternoon - in the city."

Cowboy Billy had a ten foot willy,
And he showed it to the girl next door
She thought it was a snake
So she hit it with a rake
And now it's only five-foot-four

>>214497262 (OP)
THE STUDENT AND THE TEACHER

AS the new semester began, and students filled into the lecture hall, a very haughty and arrogant professor strolled up to the lectern and delivered a bold challenge: "If God exists," he blared, "Then may this supposed 'God' strike me down within five minutes!"

The professor smirked and chuckled arrogantly as the minutes ticked away. Then, just as time was about to expire, a student sprang from his seat and ran up to the professor, giving him and mighty shove and sending him crashing to the ground.

"You stupid fool!" cried the professor. "Why did you do that!"

"God is busy protecting our troops overseas," calmly explained the student, "So He Sent ME."

You could have heard a pin drop.

The professor sobbed bitterly as he ran from the lecture hall in great shame. A thunderous chorus of applause greeted the student, who took the place of his professor on stage and gave a moving lecture about his faith in God to the rapt audience.

The professor? The professor was Death, the personification of mortality whose mere presence causes fear and anguish in all mankind.

And the student? The student, dear reader... was West German pop star and music legend Klaus Nomi.

>>214497262 (OP)
A servant sees Death in the marketplace and, terrified, borrows his master’s horse to flee to Samarra, thinking he can escape his fate. Later, Death tells the master she wasn’t threatening the servant—she was just surprised, because she already had an appointment to meet him that night in Samarra.

Moral: You can’t escape your fate; trying to avoid it may even lead you to it.

>>214497409
if i was in a myth i would be like gilgamesh except instead of the bull of heaven i would enrage the gods by killing one of the fates

>>214497262 (OP)
Vgh.. ancient arabian wisdom