Thread 215795551

gator edition

oh
fucking hell
i only have one life don't i
what the fuck have i been doing all this time

Can't stop farting and they absolutely fucking stink

>>215795569
making memories x

finna kill myself

Monday is here again. Go and make yourselves proud this week fellas, there’s a whole lot to do in this world

>>215795569
your new life starts..... NOW

>>215795582
ktim last night
went for a wee and to get a glass of water and the smell when I walked back into my grotty unventilated chambers was nothing short of rancid

>>215795551 (OP)
Swamp n bog linked up

>>215795608
very good post

>>215795595
Such as?

yeah?

>>215795589
Want some help?

>>215795602
Mine smells like a skunk has died and been left to fester for a few weeks

that time of the year when they keep forcing darts down our throats, no one cares deano you only started watching last year anyway

>>215795653
yeh we know you prefer nobs forced down your throat

>>215795653
Sounds painful

wish someone would literally force a dart down your throat

>>215795665
oh very mature, confirmed darts watcher here

lads my wanking is getting out of control

raping my own arse with a dart

should have got up at 6am instead of rolling around in bed for 3 hours trying to get back to sleep

>>215795582
Alri Emma

nintendo DS stylus down the ol 'rethra

>>215795653
love the darts me, always stand up when they sing that song. shame it's only on for like a few weeks every year tho

>>215795679
get a hold of your willard

Need her to poo in my mouth.

still thinking about jerk potato

Went to a Georgian restaurant yesterday

>>215795734
go on
tell us about it then

bossberg on his usual shite. it's 9am on a Monday lad chill out

>>215795734
Was it in Bath?

can't log into my amazon account and the indian agent's advice was just to delete my 10 year old account and make a new one. nice one

>>215795679
what're you wanking to?

reckon i've wanked to literally every race of woman except indian

remember those days when you missed school and you’d check the time and think, “they’re eating right now”

>>215795803
my first ever wank was to an indian

>>215795747
Had chicken in garlic cream sauce
Was nice
Byob too so brought a few jars of Stella

>>215795751
No

>>215795809
this but for break time
wondering if they missed my presence

>>215795789
no comment

Farts smelling like an old London open air sewer belching out into the streets

two weeks until the cocks go back

much to think about

>>215795820
>Byob too so brought a few jars of Stella
Oh lovely.
What vintage?
Was their a corkage fee?

When I flash people they move out of my lane because they know the king is coming through

>>215795858
carafed that oaf

>>215795858
Was a fiver to bring your own stuff but they didn't charge me
Believe it was a 2025 brew

glod

DANCING WITH ZUTTS IN MY BUTT
WEEPING FOR A MEMORY OF VIRGINITY GONE BY
DANCING WITH ZUTTS IN MY BUTT
LIVING OUT A MEMORY OF A HOLE THAT DIED
IT'S NIGHT AND I'M DRIVING TO MECCA AGAIN
IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE THAT IT'S MY FIRST TIME
THE ZUTT IN MY BUTTHOLE CUMS AGAIN
IT'S OVER IT'S OVER

>>215795929
Hope an elderly woman panics, brakes abruptly, and you quantum phase into her in the collision and become a screaming mess of limbs and organs like in a cronenberg fillum

When I flash people they ring the police because I'm near a school

>>215795966
i second this

mumberg's discovered facebook reels and has been utterly mindraped by AI slop

Man how l cant just wank to tits and bums and fanny it has to be a multi layered mental fantasy supported by a variety of sound and images and videos.

>>215795994
boomers have now transitioned to knowing videos are AI but still engaging with them anyway

>>215795966
I have reactions of an F1 driver and new brakes. In this scenario I would simply brake and avoid the collision, this is what kings do

having a crazy wank, hanging out the window like spiderman

>>215795994
Mad how dataleaks + ai voice n video is going to make it a scammers dream. Hope you got power if attorney over your parents

bf keeps leaving skidders in the toilet

>>215796040
sorry x

>>215795994
It's terminal I'm afraid, you'll have to put her down

>>215796023
*indian lorry driver on his phone ploughs into the back of you *

>>215796040
i've got permaskids in mine
bleach and a bog brush doesn't touch them, probably need to drain it and get the sandpaper out

are you allowed to wank in prison?

has a woman ever hit on you?

>>215795994
mumberg just asked me if l know how to turn photos of her dead parents into AI videos

>>215796069
you can even have sex.

The unknown future rolls toward us. I face it for the first time with a sense of hope, because if a machine, a Terminator, can learn the value of human life, maybe we can too.

>>215796072
Best Kimiko cud do

Oh rorke mate… not again

>>215796072
yes
there was this fat bird in Oceana who pulled me into a toilet stall and wanted me to piss in front of her but I just left

>>215796069
if your cell daddy allows it x

>>215796105
woke nonsense

imagine having adverts like this in england. it's like a different world over there.

so on one hand ai is going to put millions out of work and create a strange new world where everything is made by ai and nobody can tell whats real anymore and on the other hand ai has no use which could justify or make sufficient profis out of the massive amounts of capital invested into it and has just created a bubble which will crash shortly and put the markets back to where they were during covid

>>215796109
>. If you don't want your library turned into a mosque, go there and read.
Thought it were empty for a decade??

>>215796112
mad how the % of /brit/ lads who have been to Oceana is so much higher than the general population

>>215796109
he shouldnt be so casual about accommodating people who share none of his values

imagine if everyone ended their posts with an x regardless of what the post was haha x

>>215796141
Because no one goes there idiot

accommodate my cock in your arse

>>215796112
was about to ask why the fuck you didn't do it but then i saw "fat"

>>215796109
>british people believe *general sweeping statement presented as fact *
Not to mention a lot of these places are intentionally kept empty. Theres a pub by me thats been closed for 3 years now after the owner increased rents too much on the landlord. Theyre obviously holding it until they can get a change of use and make it into houses

>>215796159
Probably cos of cuts

>>215796149
Sorry to be the one to tell you this but we all have different values. Everyone in here is English Scottish or Welsh and yet we can’t agree on everything because we all have different values

get the planks done

>>215796176
stfu spaki

*overtakes you on the motorway then moves into the left lane and goes slower than you*

>>215796217
try harder with this one adam

My values are punting my enemies off a bridge

>>215796224
*goes to overtake you then goes the same speed as you in the inside lane*

>>215796224
*sticky bombs your whip*

>>215796217
very true for instance everyone else here thinks you're a cunt and should kill yourself
but you would disagree
different values innit

some plonker overtook me in a 20 zone only to immediately get stuck in a traffic light queue so I just put my high beams on and left them on whilst he was directly in front for the next 5 minutes aha he was pure ragin

clamping a nintendo DS around my cock

>>215796217
Actually were basically culturally synonymous and its ridiculous to argue otherwise. Scots/welsh/english/Irish are different of course and rightly so but they have a lot more in common with each other than a frenchman or danish person or a paki

Beelieve in yourself

>>215796248
is this what they're calling frosted turds these days

please don't argue with spaki

If you lads want a good laugh you should google the Irish famine.

>>215796303
bro was on here earlier in a completely dead thread spamming cp

>>215796292
dunno why but i just wanked and cunmed to this

>>215796327
No fish please, we're Irish!

I think it’s high time I refreshed my wardrobe

>to the tune of the country hit Just Got Back
just got blacked,
yeah l just got blacked,
and all these crazy rednecks are singing we got ya back

ah yes "spaki". Tell me. Is he here in the room with us right now?

sir kevin macleod

>>215796276
But we have different values. If we all had the same values there wouldn’t be different political parties there would just be one because all of us have the same values

>>215796333
he needs locking up

swear people stopped saying “in the room with us right now” about 6 months ago dead meme omdz

>>215796352
yes

the girls of outer /int/ are making fun of us again

>to the tune of the Christian rap song He's Coming Back
he's getting blacked
he's getting blacked
he's getting blacked
yeah
he's getting blacked

Shouted at some teens speeding in a car, reminding them that it's a 20 here but they shouted the only 20 I've ever seen is on my scales then they drove off laughing

dem a wake up

>>215796352
yes

morning chaps, morning nathan

>>215796159
More likely because the council cut their budget
Library in my village got plenty of use but still shut down

Right well Uber Eats is done. They're cracking down hard on alcohol orders now

>>215796448
Have to be over 18 now yeah?

>>215796448
Those who use it support rape gangs

>>215795569
>>215795589
>>215795846
ktim

wonder how much Jude Law got paid for his shitty Uber Eats ad

they won't like me telling you this but the original jews were chinese

Actual nazis in Wales

tipping over biomass dinghys in the English channel

Adrian Hilton utterly bollocked that 'Basil the Great' freak back there

thinking of becoming a deliveroo driver to force myself to get some exercise in

might wank my arse

>>215796494
did this nibba literally do a reddit repost here

>>215796459
I don't have any ID on me so as far as I'm concerned it's OVER between me and Uber Eats, will have to find a new alcohol delivery service now

the read

bought a packet of those Fox's chunky cookies then opened them only to learn that they've done away with the old chunky cookies. The ones you get are similar in size to what you get in a packet of Maryland cookies. Normal sized.

my own fault really, should have known

>>215796531
would they actually deliver without proof of ID? or was it just because the delivery guys were boriswavers

>>215796531
or just walk to a shop?

Genuinely not showered in 10 days bet l'm not even top 5 stinkest lads on here

might have one of them wanks i've heard so much about

I'm loud and I'm zipping around; jet ski
Your dick is lil' like Wayne; Gretzky
But Gretsky's got a big dick; clarification
Everyone was rude to me; Paris vacation

>>215796579
vile, if i miss one shower i feel disgusting the next morning

they got dropped off by the cronem

>>215796636
whats on the agenda today zied, apart from cronemposting?

Wish l believed in God or heaven

*yawn*
get some new material

>>215796622
very bad lyricism

>>215796636
they in the showers slapping their batons together

really enjoying my new suede coat. i can see why people wore leather a lot in the old days.

>>215796579
i can't shower at the moment as the boiler's on the blink so it's been kettle baths for me and I reek

Mental how there are lads posting here with thick, juicy autismarses that remain unsniffed and unfucked

*staples new material to my knob*

Great day out with my gf and our friends yesterday team. Fantastic really, you can’t put a price on Sundays spent out and about

>>215796648
im not zied
>>215796672
no, stop posting homosexual content

>>215796685
why are our arses so plump and fuckable, has this ever been explained

>>215796672
hot

Life is a box of chocolates and my name is Forrest Gump
Though I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed, I give Jenny all my love
Okay, then I'm a legal aide, Erin Brockovich is my name
Then you can call me Scarface, snortin' mountains of cocaine

he says stop posting gay stuff but his 10cm and thin pecker just twitched
we all saw it!

i remember when i was poor i used to do the kettle bath as well, because i'd have £5 left on the meter for the whole month and the electric shower would run it down too quickly

DL cronem looking for white chocolate tops on grindr

Danny McBride is the funniest actor alive or dead and it’s not even debatable

>>215796707
it is indeed strange how this is the average /brit/ arse

>>215796732
Is this an anecdote from Kes or something. Surely people dont live like this anymore

>>215796768
fuck off stop reposting me you freak

>>215796768
how could a man possibly see this and be straight. being straight is gay in 2025

I’d make my own twerk video for you lads but it would break the internet and I want to keep using the internet

>>215796772
this was about 15 years ago, i was 18 and was looking for a job, living off my savings which were almost nothing

what does huw edwards do all day now?

>>215796825
walk around with his trousers and pants off

absolutely mental how many lads woke up with a peng lass in their bed this morning, everyone’s having sex

>>215796825
has a wank

>>215796846
it sucks because girls get horny at night when you're tired and are absolutely frigid in the morning when you've got the morning wood and need to start the day off with a spaff

had phone sex with an american (female) yesterday

>>215796405
No way teens still use stone

>>215796825
posts here

>>215796825
Isnt he in prison?

>>215796881
when you nut but she keep suckin

>>215796881
rape scream

>>215796531
They never let you order booze without id

They call me Poop Dick Johnson because my johnson is a poop dick.

This is the tale of Tony Montana
Cubano flame with Miamian guns
Got a basehead wife her womb is polluted
This whole town's a pussy just waiting to get fucked

'uv this /brit/ish horrow clown, simple as.
https://www.twitch.tv/videos/2589865181?t=0h5m50s

What are you doing this fine monday morning, lads?

James O'Brien's having a right go

>>215796938
sex cat unicorn thing

sometimes l think the singular Bradley poster is being disingenuous

Christ almighty, hundred quid for a new passport
Bit steep isn't it
How about instead of digital ID starmer just makes passports free

>>215796945
why has this image been posted hundreds of times
get a fucking job

>>215796952
>FREE PALESTINE
>NO NOT LIKE THAT

>>215796952
Who

here lies rorke
killed by woke

>>215796995
angry leftypol gammon

>>215796995
Teleporter chief in Star Trek

>>215797011
fucking hell janny quick with this one

>>215796976
Is it mandatory to get one in Britain, even if you don't travel?

It is in Germany (and getting steadily more expensive due to stupid chips, stupid fingerprints and such).

Ship Rorke off to North Sentinel Island

growing a coke nail purely for boogers

>>215797025
No, lots of people dont have their passport.

/brit/ is the last white thread on this entire website

>>215797029
imagine shagging their arse

they allowed those Palestine rats to return to their nests and somehow this isn’t good enough

>>215797029
i can see their willys O.o

>>215797029
The North Sentinel Island people NEED to drop their back day routine

>>215797053
>somehow this isn’t good enough
for whom?

>>215797056
mental how even on tv they show boobs when it's native tribes but they will censor out the boobs of the white presenter

>>215797029
mate those lads are 14 in that image

janny you beautiful angel

>>215797079
>>215797080

Britain would be the best country if real estate were for living, not for Boomer investment.

spaino posting cp again

>>215797065
James O'Brieieien

>>215797087
janny you beautiful angel

>>215737113
just browse simpchat

for fuck sake

Give it a rest you wrong un

>>215797019
>destroys all your atoms and then recreates an exact copy elsewhere
Wouldnt catch me using these evil murder machines

>>215797065
bored leftists who need something to moan about

growing a poop nail

>>215797107
whats that and how is it different to simpcity or coomer.st?

pre-drinking before the England game

nathan feeling zesty this morning is he

>>215737113
clarabelles

She's a big girl

What's the weather like where you lads are then?

>>215797126
I think they were somehow under the impression that Hamas would gain real international support to push back and defeat Israel hence all of that "globalise the intifada" shite

>>215797183
cold and overcast

brother why

>>215797181
The old ai cp is it? Pretty grim lad

I'll be layin' in the cot waitin' for your mom
Clutchin' on this lube and roses
I got my digital camera
I'ma make your momma do a million poses
They will be so surprised
We are so cool and thoughtful
Can't wait to pork your mom
I'ma be the syrup, she can be my waffle
Sho' Nuff
My momma loves bubble bath with chamomile
Straight up
Give it to my mom d-d-d-d-d-d-doggy style (Yeah)
This is the perfect plan
For a perfect Mother's Day
They'll have to rename this one
All up under the covers day

>>215797180
*

>>215797192
Enough about your mum, mate.

>>215797183
Cold and undercast

I'll be layin' in the cot waitin' for your mom
Clutchin' on this lube and roses
I got my digital camera
I'ma make your momma do a million poses
They will be so surprised
We are so cool and thoughtful
Can't wait to pork your mom
I'ma be the syrup, she can be my waffle
Sho' Nuff
My momma loves bubble bath with chamomile
Straight up
Give it to my mom d-d-d-d-d-d-doggy style (Yeah)
This is the perfect plan
For a perfect Mother's Day
They'll have to rename this one
All up under the covers day

Diego: Ramones
Mousey: The Clash
Spaino: Busted

>>215797183
getting nice mid 20s now

>>215797183
Relativelh mild and overcast

Lads, I accidentally opened it. Didn't save it, I'm not into that. Will I be in trouble?

>>215797151
If it's not World Cup I don't give a toss

pissing up into my face and all over my chest

>>215797250
no

>>215797250
@GCHQ

>>215797250
yes that action has been logged I believe

>>215797250
Youll probably only get 5years instead of 10. Out in 2 with good behavior

this dude finna be eating chicken

>>215797253
@ASIO

>>215797250
Constabulary Patel will be at your domicile momentarily!

>>215797275
braphogess in the background

brapley walsh

>>215797275
pilates kinda kinky with all that hardware...

Whys he having a cp melty?

breakfast vittles have been consumed

>>215797349
>cp melty
what's that a chicken parm from subway

got the John Michael Godier on
funny man, he sounds droll but then 5 minutes in he's talking about completely random shite and then sometimes he can be quite funny too

>>215797349
something must have triggered spaki. doesnt take much these days considering how mindraped he's become

>>215797294
i can't even look at a picture like that without wanting to have a wank oh lord braphogs make me so fucking hard

>>215797349
was it actual fucking cp? i closed the tab as soon as i saw the thumbnails

Mumberg finally told him to stop reseting the router

ran out of milk. that's me done and dusted

wish you lot would fuck off a little bit

>>215797389
wouldn't know mate

>>215797405
you sure about that matey?

>>215797430
Based

>>215797430
>raids on the local LGBT community.
erm how does he know where they are

moaning.. x

spinning around in circles on the floor whilst sucking my own cock

might convert to muslimism

>>215797469
they make them fleshlight sized now?

feeling ill
anyone want to look after me x

>>215797485
speaking of how come
judaism = jew
christianity = christian
islam = muslim??

>>215797509
Islam means "submission to the will of God" and is the name of the religion, while a Muslim is a follower of Islam, meaning "one who submits to God"

eating nigger shit

>>215797528
What a fucking slag.

...wait..... did you say JVPVN??? Thvt's sovl actuvlly!!!

just witnessed this

>>215797534
don’t care, brown

>>215797534
>submission
ooh ello

>>215797430
Based

Thank you President Trump for releasing the hostages!

>>215797528
orientals seem so alien with those eastern mannerisms

>>215797580
no worries pal x

>>215797582
eastern men are profoundly pedophilic so the women have to act like children to attract them

just witnessed this on outer /int/

>>215797528
That initial reaction is good if it's acting, but as it's on the Internet I'm assuming it's real

>>215797557
based
I will be gentle when I deport him back to gookistan

>>215797381
Grace mogs her

>>215797623
anyone whos watched this stream for even 1 milisecond should be obliterated to be honest

imagine finding girls under 15 stones attractive
all skin and bones
i like a woman you can hold onto something

>>215797557
well that's islam been done

i like a woman you can grab onto something

>>215797623
Why is one arm bigger than the other?

banana

imagine finding girls under 15 unattractive

>>215797557
leftypol in denial about islam award

>>215797641
ur welcome to all the fat girls you want lads, they’re for low status males. I assume you can get them

gm

>>215797654
well

Called in sick today but still sitting in the teams chat ready to send zingers

It is the same guy who does it to britpol, same guy from runcorn?
He's a fucking cretin, and I'll be contacting the NCA shortly

sweets for tea again last night now i dont feel so great

>>215797722
grow up

>>215797639
Blud hates leng kiwi tings SAD

>>215797648
Angle and she likes working out while looking at her tats(hypothesis)

>>215797746
ever tried not being a pitiful incel sadcase?

girls called grace are always slags aren't they

>>215797762
Yh I'm succeeding x

>>215797804
She moved to Bangkok I don't think she's doing much shagging