Thread 215937127

Hitwoman Edition

Previous:>>215922954

So many old people in my city. Why won’t they fucking die

>>215937265
>Average age is like ~80 in civilized countries now
>that means all those drunk young people dying in car crashes are offset by legions of geezers living into their 90s
Boomers are gonna be with us for decades more

Got diarrhea so bad it feels like I'm pissin out my asshole (mobile posting from the toilet rn)

>>215937343
stinky

Zoomers seem to be unironically claiming anyone who isn't a mutt is inbred.

>>215937162
That was my first reply to you thoughbeit, and I work weekends and people say this to me all the time

sorry tim, but we cannot go back. we stay here now.

>>215937127 (OP)
abnormally amusing for female humor

Your country of origin is a shithole not because of the first world, but because of you

It’s okay to sexually abuse women if they look at you

>>215937465
Indeed. My wife scrolls insta in bed and I swear, nobody knows how to kill a joke more than women on instagram. Like 90% of the stuff is an attempt at humor that should have had the latter 3/4 of the video trimmed

>>215937496
women dont look at me

>>215937496
Is it not already abuse being seen in public, forcing people to regard your corpulent body

>>215937507
Only old women are funny

>>215937465
She’s black and fat so she’s bound to be more funny

I am him

>>215937564
idk maybe this is just mommy issues but specifically lower middle class 50+ year old women with smoker voices usually are very funny and comforting to be around (in a non sexual way before the sick gooners try to say something) like they know they're past their prime and they're very non judgemental and easier to talk to than old men

>>215937579
He never said that

I completed my Holy build at level 75 in Elden Ring.
Holy is the worst damage type but I thought the OP early tutorial I watched was legit so I tried to Big Dick godrick with Rings of Light, got completely mulched and lost 100k runes

I like sex hubba hubba

They should start a 6 piece Indian Death Metal Band called Six Sick Sikhs

women will not kiss you on the bus

I've never left my island

>>215937778
I think loo-pooers with shirts stylized to make it one word and pronounced loopers could be a really big cult indie ban if they had a good enough manager ala arctic monkeys

>>215937790
Is that some Law of Thermodynamics

An endangered whale shark swam near the Gaza coast yesterday and Palishits killed it

>>215937790
well how about a kiss on the lips instead?

>>215937403
its ironic too because menas are the most inbred ethnicity in the world
mules arent viable offspring, idk why we act like race mixing is normal

lol you mfs always mad at something

I wish just one white woman would have sex with me just once

i have ptosis
thom york has ptosis
i am thom york

I hate Arabs

>>215938203
Pay for it. Maybe she’ll fall in love with you

ive never owned a car

>>215938345
Me too

Listened to the part of the audiobook where Lion El'Johnson defeats Angron, pretty epic

>>215938257
We are only known for our bad smell :(

i bought my car for 3300 dollars off facebook marketplace

im going craaaaazy

>>215938403
**kisses your cheek**

>>215938482
i dont look like that but i talk like that

>>215938508
What do you look like then

Blood stains, speed kills
Fast cars, cheap thrills
Rich girls, fine wine
I've lost my sense, I've lost control, I've lost my mind
Oh, my God
Blood stains, speed kills
Fast cars, cheap thrills
Rich girls, fine wine
I've lost my sense, I've lost control, I've lost my mind

>>215938482
if he is gay he is probably annoying if he is just someone's chill dad showing support he's probably a cool guy

I look like this

>>215938534
He's obviously a faggot though ever

>>215938526
i look like this

>>215938482
I would like to hate crime this faggot

>>215938534
if thats someones dad he probably sucks his sons cock

>>215938557
Oh hey spinny

>>215938571
*laughs fatly*

Been writhing in pain every night for the last week
feet and hands tingling, pain in chest alternating left and right
Went to a hospital earlier thought about going in but then realized i'm going to die anyway so it doesn't matter

>>215938590
im not spinny

it is friday and I don't have to work so I woke up late and now I will have some weed and play battlefield like its 2013 again

Thinking about avin a nap.

*dancing*

i figured it out

I'm going to die alone
i'm only 25 years old I can't believe it

>>215938862
What was the original of?

>>215938936
nude hooker

>>215938936
A green toad wearing a blue shirt

>>215938936
Jason stripping

>>215938957
Actually or just a guess? That was my guess as well but given context it could eaually likely be a chopped out harley

>>215939087
actual

>>215938529
hey, I posted that last time! How about this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HC6AJnTI-FQ

>>215939130
what are you on?

>>215939130
i didnt see your post about it

you're just too good to be true
can't take my eyes off of you

>>215939166
the two substances mentioned in the song, and weed

nigga im nuts

I cannot have sex even if you held a gun to my head and said "Have sex incel"

going to rewatch american psycho

>>215939197
post some more 70s west coast garage punk then
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qbNrzHCMnM

>>215939248
I could not have sex even if a hot big titted woman was guiding my penis into her vaginal orifice i would kick and scream and say no get away from me this is a trick

>>215939220
I can only identify wine but i've had a few as well

>>215939268
I dl'd the sequel with the Jewish chick from that 70s show but maybe I'm just not cool enough to enjoy bad movies ironically. But I'm not sure, because I liked Dracula 3000, Troll 2 and Jason X.

at the rate i’m reaching developmental milestones, i expect to live to be 230 years old

I wish I had a Mordred gf who was dominant but in a loving way where she basically treated me like the woman of the reationship

>>215939302
no I meant in the Gang Green song I posted
>you got the beer, we got the time
>you got the coke, gimme a line

I wish I could sing

>>215939376
interesting. tell me more

>>215939379
you live in eastern europe so give me some gypsy kino
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJ1jz3Vf1sc

All fart no shart

>>215939116
Well was she at least hot

>>215939376
have you considered artoria gf that treats you like a man and acts cutely and happy when you cook for her

>>215939277
no

>>215939505
I live in Slovenia, there is no gypsy or turbofolk music here, only polka. But I guess the closest equivalent would be this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VkZ_1qmV75k

Back from the gym and I feel like vomiting

>>215939541
ok, then I'll do it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=530gC6BztnA

>>215939563
the people who had to see your stinky ass at the gym feel the same way

>>215939465
My relationship with my mom's fine I just like dominant and tomboyish women
>>215939539
1. She's too subby for my tastes
2. I like her with Shirou

todays spa day so i put a nice moisturizing mask on my face and my skin feels so shiny and soft now. gonna hat my hair done in an hour and really excited cause its a little out of control from pulling some off in jiu jitsu

>>215939554
lol. that's one crowd where i'd fit in

Loud nigger that stunk of weed sat near me on the bus

>>215939624
They're mostly Indian I'm sure they've smelled worse

>>215939713
god bless him and fuck you

>>215939723
guys that work out smell good because they are high t and shower a lot. the best smelling indians are the muscular ones that go to the gym.
sweat purifies endemic stink

>>215939696
the video was shot 25 years ago, but the crowd is mostly hunters, who wear dark green and widebrim hats unlike American hunters

I am afraid of getting fat

IT'S FUNNY YOU'RE OUT DRINKIN
FUNNY I'M AT HOME
FUNNY EVERYBODY KNOWS SOMETHING THAT I DON'T
FUNNY HOW I DO THIS EVERY SINGLE TIME
SO FUNNY THAT I HAVE TO LAUGH SO I DON'T CRY

>>215939810
work out every day, don't drink any liquid calories, don't eat breakfast, and don't get sick or injured

>>215939844
I drink everyday that's why I'm afraid

>>215939764
their phenotypes belong to my kind

I was born into such unfortunate circumstances that I never stood a chance.

Sometimes I refer to the American continents as "The New World"
Anyone else?

>>215939897
that's southeast Slovenia, so balkanic

cummypies, im drinking covfefe

>>215939962
sometimes, but more often we refer to America as 'čez lužo', across the pond

thinking about the butterfly effect that this one post caused

>>215939861
its an important choice to make. i think when you realzie theres a massive underground of people in AA that can't stop drinking it should help you think twice about the benefit of it all.
do you want to quit? if you do, can you? if you can't, do you need help?

>>215940003
Being of European descent and living here is so insane
British serfs in the 17th century came here on wooden ships to cross an ocean that even today took me 8 hours to cross by plane, and Los Angeles, one of our biggest cities was a backwater somewhat recently

And we just act like it's no big deal and that these people weren't trailblazers

>>215940003
that usage is reserved for british people. please refrain

>>215940161
I find San Francisco even more interesting cause clearly it's a big hub for commerce and the US navy, but the weather's so bad that everyone chose to settle in Silicon Valley instead.

I love beautiful women but I would never ever want to be one

This life playthrough is cooked

>>215940311
White women live in just an exist mode. Being born a white woman=winning the life lottery.

Where's the canadian who was complaining about expensive mexican food last night?

>>215940378
We executed him

Is Julia Holter the best pop singer of our generation?

>>215940419
Julia Holter is not a pop singer

>>215940378
why do you ask?

>>215940432
Then what is she?

hate this guy so much
https://desuarchive.org/int/search/text/im%20drinking%20covfefe/

Listening to the new Tame Impala album. Not every impressed but still enjoying it.

>>215940469
why?

>>215940465
she's an art singer, like a modern day Laurie Anderson, or Bjork

>>215940495
>new Tame Impala album
today's listening of Marquee Moon is now cancelled

>>215940530
Bjork is a pop star

>>215940469
he is literally just being a dude why the hate?

>>215940469
I always hated the megafart poster

>>215940559
and Julia Holter is my age, and I have experienced ageism on here frequently. Also, almost no one can hum a Bjork tune if you asked them to

There's a hoe singer every week now
How can zoomers keep up with that?

>>215940601
Everyone knows It's So Quiet

>>215940601
If someone asked you to hum a Bjork tune, what's the first thing that would come to your mind? For me it would be Pagan Poetry.

dialed in the air fryer cookies settings
these things really are just better ovens

i have rubber bands on my braces and i hope they stretch my canines out and make them cool vampire fangs.

>>215940469
>it started in march 2024
Feels longer than that

The Tame Impala guy New Ordered himself over 3 albums until there were no more pop tunes on his record. But New Order had Peter Hook who insisted that their EDM songs have to have melodies and acoustic instruments, which is why they never New Ordered themselves quite to the degree Kevin did.

>>215940717
I had braces for 5 years and I still cut food up in pieces never bite in whole

>>215940702
I keep trying to make frozen pizza in the air fryer but I think it's a fool's errand

>>215940695
Joga, because that's the only Bjork song on my drunk playlist

>>215940769
I fucking love frozen pizza in the air fryer
cutting it while it's frozen is a pain but I usually put 2 slices in at 160°C for 12-14 minutes

>>215940872
>°C

Another artist I admire who New Ordered himself was the guy behind Bark Psychosis. He went into puro DnB soon after Hex and though he released an album 10 years later that undid much of the New Ordering, I never liked Codename Dustsucker much, but Hex is one of my fav albums and the stuff prior to that is also pretty stellar.

>>215940907
I liked New Order better than Joy Division idc

>>215940907
what music have you created yourself?

>>215940895
every time I translate something into kg or c for a euro or otherwise metric user they do something like this
fuck you guys I'm done doing it

I didn't go to music school, I went to music.

Pooping right fucking now mother fuckers

>>215941009
my cock is going to come up your toilet

>>215940971
LOL

>>215940964
I didn't, I'm just big into pop music culture, and pop criticism. I grew up in an era when torrenting suddenly made a lot of obscure old music available to everyone, and there was pitchfork and critics like Mark Prindle and George Starostin and Christgau and that just sort of became my hobby, finding obscure old music and forming an opinion on it. Also, when I was 14 my dad played me Sonic Youth's Rain on Tin. I thought they were the worst band in the world, but I love them now.

>>215941059
ok you are valid

And while reading music reviews and listening to old record may seem like a shitty hobby, the thing is that for me as an ESL these critics with their florid and jokey styles meant strengthening my connection to the English language as well as pop culture, which means a lot to me. I had read some gonzo journalism and beat poetry before and this was right up that alley.

MEEE I LOVE THE OH SEES

forgot I put cookies in the air fryer and the beep scared me

>>215941256
nice I fucking LOVE blogposts that exist for validation-starved perma-online losers!

Im canadian

>>215941256
I'm a loser but I'm just not that into music

Nose game

>>215941295
Me too

>>215941256
I used to know the lyrics to Trout Mask Replica by heart when I was a senior in high school, so yeah

>>215941256
Only ones I've listened to are aphex twin and talking heads

>>215941295
that's not a blogpost you dumbass nigga

>>215941261
How can one mf be this jumpy

>>215941384
yes it is faggot, nobody gives a shit what music you listen to and nobody ever will
those gay ass charts are just for faggots that want brownies points with strangers online

>>215941256
I listened to a lot of Oh Sees live sets during Covid on yt, they went on for like 4 hours and had this motorik beat. Hate most of those bands though.

I fucking like black sabbath, guns n' roses, orianthi, iron maiden, carlos santana, cream 1968, pink floyd, slipknot

>>215941256
Idgi many of these bands are classic

high and watching pawn stars rn

>>215941472
you don't understand what a blogpost is. lurk more before you start trying to use terms you don't understand you piece of trash

>>215941492
can I interest you in Wishbone Ash? my fav band of all time
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPsEeY2JbpM

I wish I lived in Wichita

>>215941539
THIS IS WITCH SEX, MOTHERFUCKER!

>>215941516
no (You) don't understand you retarded faggot and it's lurk MOAR
go to /mu/ if you want someone to suck your dick for sharing a taste in coworker music

I am a cocksman

come and try my
dixie biscuit :3

>>215941558
I am not the OP
You are a faggot
stop being so insecure

>>215941564
post your codpiece

>>215941593
Hi guys it's Jason, I suck dick

>>215941256
Almost

>>215941605
No it isn’t.

>>215941593
>stop being so insecure
ooh let me guess, you're one of these:
>>215941336
>>215941464
and eagerly awaiting a
>dude nice taste haha

>>215941598
It's 4o'clock thank you

>>215941511
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hpigjnKl7nI&pp=ygUSd2F0Y2ggeW8gcHJvZmFuaXR5

dad said the word tranny today (referring to a car he was fixing) and it was kind of weird to here outside the internet

>>215941626
you're not as smart as you think you are`

this latest Tame Impala album sure ain't no Currents. That album is so good, it's got all the tunes.

>>215941626
you okay?

The two guys replying to each other are actually Jason just replying to himself

>>215941647
He's saying the car has an axe wound inside it that's oozing? or what did he mean

>>215941647
My tranny needs a fluid swap and maybe a new set. Am I talking about a car part or a person? You decide

This mf mad because he doesn't know what a blogpost is

is aphex twin good or do people just say they like him because he was a pioneer

>>215941648
wow dude there's no possible way it could be you now

>>215941256
I am a normalfag thoughbeit

>>215941637
it's 5 o' clock somewhere

>>215941699
THEN SINCE YOU'RE FUCKING EINSTEIN, THEN EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THE FUCK A BLOGPOST IS MOTHERFUCKER

>>215941699
he's a fag too

>>215941731
It's 4o'clock in madison wisconsin

>>215941722
It’s obvious unless you’re delusional. Just kill yourself now. It’s the only way to salvage some dignity

>it's not a blogpost!
they say, as multiple people fill out a chart and then post it to no replies (because nobody actually gives a shit and everybody just wants to share their taste and feel special)

>>215941700
i listen to downtempo mixes of AT to go to sleep, they're deffo more civilized than most EDM

Saw an Indian guy squat in the middle of the sidewalk and take a selfie. Wish I wasn't driving so I could take a pic. Surreal.

>>215941770
meow

>>215941768
>>215941742
>>215941732
>>215941722
>>215941699
>>215941776
>>215941787
Now watch this

Dadberg wants me to go with him to a protest tomorrow

>>215941732
See above

>>215941784
He was taking a shit

>>215941776
They have no friends.
For most incel this is literally the ONLY place they get human interaction

got the military suit might try impossible mode or move on to dead space 2

>>215941793
you failed at life

Incels anonymous

>>215941793
lmfao

"blogposting is the lowest form of imageboard discussion" - tony soprano

>>215941801
Tell dad he's a stupid libshit and that you're reporting him to ICE

>>215941801
im going to watch the no kings protest tomorrow

>samefagging
you lost bro

>>215941700
he made some of the best ambient music ever made but its ambient music, its not something you actively listen to

>>215941776
It's a bingo bro. Nobody's reading them unless you get a bingo (and even then they won't) that's not the point. He's also correct, it's not a blogpost. A blogpost is when someone makes a long post about some meaningless or uninteresting thing about their life (like the brapzilian used to do/still does)

At work (an inn/B&B). There's a wedding party and it's a lot of rich people getting drunk

>>215941637
I come from the future, do not be afraid.

Lindyblogging

>>215941823
Just move on. 2 is alao pretty fun

is it one of those threads?

I’m not.

Thankfully!!

>>215941906
23B

>>215941902
BUHSUHKAH!

/brit/-quality posting atm

>>215941906
2FA

>>215941256
Only group here I see myself crossing off is the beatles and it's just barely. I'm a hip hop head. Couldve added mf doom, Eminem and wiz khalifa

>>215941906
This is a '''''blog''''post apparently
also 24 and I don't drink coffee

>>215941852
what is going on????????????????

>>215941904
gonna download this mod that replaces ds2 isaac with ds1

>>215941927
Without the proper upkeep (Jason and FK posts) all generals tend towards disorder

I'm going to write a book about how shitty illiterate people are, they will never know.

>>215941948
a desperate attempt to win an argument by editing the page

>>215941814
>For most incel this is literally the ONLY place they get human interaction
I talk to my mum sometimes though usually these days its more just her staring with a look of disappointment
oh well what can you do

>>215941937
>This is a '''''blog''''post apparently
yes it is, glad you're finally putting your few remaining brain cells to the test and learning

>>215941906
23A but with sugar in A

Eating a turkey leg right now

Bratwursts consumed

>>215941906
34a

>>215942046
What's that your bra size?

stop blogposting guys

please do the needful

Watching YouTube while I eat

pawn stars is so good

Flirting with girls over text is hard
as soon as the convo gets even slightly dry yjk she's dropping you and moving over to the other thousand dudes she has in her inbox

Please blogpost I want to hear about the things you do and the things going on in your life

family guy gag idea: Peter goes outside and everyone is a version of Gary Oldman's character from Slow Horses

>>215942184
How many people would laugh?

>>215937291
Go white boy

>>215942203
I would, for one

>>215942203
1

>>215942184
That's funny. I have an idea: they should do a George Floyd styled gag where Joe is trying to kneel but he can't manage to because he's crippled.

>>215942183
I was riding back from my buddy's place wednesday night and about halfway through my hour long ride, all the electronics on my bike turned off (headlights too). Bike was running just fine, but I couldn't see and had nothing else. Luckily there were still enough people on the road that I could use their headlights to get home. Thanks for reading my blog

>>215942183
Read something with a damn instead

>>215942183
Momberg making something gross. I will post the end results for dinner

>>215942183
Today I jerked off, ate fast food and posted on 4chan
Are you satisfied

>>215942183
>>215942275
*worth
Forgot picrel

>>215942184
Give me the shtones

>>215942226
Joe falling and rolling all over Floyd while trying to kill him incongruously would be bold and great

family guy idea:
peter becomes a cop and kneels in solidarity with black people
but, every time he kneels, he accidentally lands on the neck of a black protestor doing a lie-in
IM GIVING YOU GOLD, SETH

>>215942183
catberg on my lap atm

>>215942301
This might be the most boring ass cover for a book ever.

>>215942340
>family guy idea:
Stopped there

>>215942369
I wish I was that cat

>>215942340
now that is funny

>>215942183
I woke up had a pot of coffee, drove around aimlessly in the shitbox, returned home shat my guts out, cried over my worthless loser life, shat and pissed some more, and then went back to the Chan browsing

>>215942340
yeah, that'd be dynamite

Type "W King" in the chat

video games

>>215942373
>boring
You need something that grabs your attention due to the fact you have a short attention span. Reading is a memory exercise and would help with that. Here's another

>>215942424
rip hero

>>215942473
Jewish Nigga Westwood

>>215942449
ganja be an indian borrowing into jamaican patois, ya kna'

>>215942449
Guyanese and Trini jeets absolutely HATE the newjeets Canada has now.

>>215942424
H-town mentioned

>>215942473
My dad really liked this book

I woke up to a robin's nest outside of my window and I guess state birds can handle the winter...

>>215942529
Saved. Looks neat

>>215942529
FEGELEIN FEGELEIN FEGELEIN!

>>215942529
But you're Brazilian, your dad is brown

Janny couldn't get me because I brushed that nigga off like I'm John Cena

>>215942529
Your dad is a hoe

Reading a book about whitey bulger

>>215942567
>>215942576
>But you're Brazilian, your dad is brown
My dad is white german

>>215942577
the movie was OK, but I can't remember a single scene

>>215942574
Jannies still think it's 2009 and that banned anons can't just easily come back.

>>215942473
>You are this this and that...
Sure.

Now that's better.

>>215942590
He’s a faggot and he gave birth to a tranny

>>215942634
Make the new

>>215942664
It’s been made stupid

>>215941906
3
4
A

>>215942664

>>215942621

>>215942891
>>215942891
>>215942891
real new

>>215937966
Whale sharks aren't endangered and they are edible