Thread 216514306

baddiedem edish

nth for the gyaldem

penis wank on the cards

I really don't understand or like this -em meme.

>>216514409
the hedgehogdem

>>216514433
an aging british singer

total estonia love

tracy beaker femdom

ay tone

>>216514306 (OP)
Going to try and hike a 1,400m ascent whilst weighing 250lb and being unable to run more than a minute - wonder if I will die

>>216514445
I too love Estonia - I took this photo outside of the best cafe in Tallinn

>>216514481
i wish we had pink baroque buildings. canadian cities are so ugly i swear

>>216514481
going most places in europe outside of balkan shitholes reminds you of how ugly and depressing the uk is

If they can do it why can’t I

gave some mail addressed to "the occupier" to my Jewish flatmate and now he's upset

fags queue at pubs

Setting myself up for life by going to Durham university and doing accounting

>>216514536
scream

>>216514454
take a pic at the top for /brit/ x

>>216514545
they've been banned from pubs since 2008 mate

>>216514524
his instagram escort has got a rather lovely cartier

>>216514568
Are you a woman then

>>216514564
yeah youre a fag too

>>216514481
would absolutely hate to be part of a small country that constantly seethes about its bigger neighbours

Treating myself to an evening Costa, lads

>>216514509
>>216514511
Truth

>>216514524
this is a condensed form of the 50 shades of grey movie

what's he doing here then

>>216514576
no but i have slim wrists

>>216514562
Of course, I shall take many photos. The mountain is Guri I Kuq in the Accursed Mountains

>>216514601
posted it again award

>>216514612
this nigga lookin like he aint been unlocked yet

>>216514403
honestly bro maybe, i might be in the area soon

hi

will never understand these cunts working in service jobs who jokingly say no when I ask for something (coffee for example). how am I even meant to reply to that? it happens far too often and I usually just pretend to laugh.

>>216514622
hello deano

>>216514651
alri

>>216514657
walk out without paying for whatever you've already bought

>>216514622
me when i fly BA premium economy and they give me a glass of "sparkling wine" after i sit down

>>216514651
yuo are gril??

>>216514657
instead of 'can/could I have' use 'I'd like'. that'll fucking shut them up

>>216514607
really lovely. i don't know why i've neglected northern europe, i should visit someday

>>216514657
Should just get up and say you'll go somewhere else, then leave
Hopefully it will be awkward enough that they won't do it again

*enters*

>>216514659
If you’re happy with being broke all your life just say that

>>216514433
AOUGHHH!!!! *i shout in faux-disgust and I smirk to myself as everyone in /brit/ turns to face me* LOOKS LIKE, ALAN CARR FARTED ON IT!!1

>>216514657
just say "ok i will not be giving you my custom then" and walk out
thats what i do
i do NOT want to be privy to their STUPID jokes

>>216514675
>>216514687
>>216514689
I'm exaggerating a little bit but it's happened a few times now. genuinely this morning in Costa: "alright mate can I get a medium latte please"

"no" *he pauses* then laughs.

What am I doing wrong?

Why have today's men gotten soft

>>216514607
seriously how did this happen
why do irrelevant countries in continental europe have much prettier architecture than this one, it actually makes me jealous. we were the richest empire ffs could they really not use that money on doing places up a bit or hiring good architects (unless our good architects just had 0 sense of beauty)

>>216514696
You're living off microwave pizzas until your UC comes in next week lad get off your high horse

>>216514622
so cringe it's like a form of birth control

>>216514624
ktim

>>216514612
Who greets you when you arrive home?

>>216514717
they need veagra xD

In most ancient cultures, the sun was associated with masculine energy and the moon with feminine energy.
However, in the far north of the world, from Scandinavia to Russia and Siberia to Mongolia to the northern native Americans, we see precisely the opposite - the moon was associated with masculine energy and the sun was associated with feminine energy.

>>216514748
this post gives off incel energy

*enters /brit/*

>>216514719
To be fair this was in the old town which is the tourist centre of Tallinn - the outskirts of the city were depressing commie blocks

>>216514716
Just say "Medium Latte" and keep it moving. They don't need your life story. Jesus wept, the spergs that frequent this general.

>>216514717
they can't get their poos sorted apparently. once they've got that done things will improve

>>216514740
do you think i'm ziedbelg
it's just a funny video

>>216514721
Never claimed anything in my entire life and never will I have pride unlike you

>>216514719
think we preferred making little englands on massive continents all over the world than painting our little town centres

>>216514762
wahey

>>216514785
Mum does it for you does she?

>>216514657
clock them in the mouth

>>216514791
and those little englands never looked good either

things are happening in china lads

>>216514716
you look soft sorry lad get a fade, hit the gym and look mean

*walks into /brit/*
>"Hiya mate, one poo post please"

need a hobby
any suggestions?

i want to make friends too, but i think i need some hobbies first. willing to spend some gbp if needed (equipment, etc.)

What a bizarre response to my question

>>216514821
scenes in cheadle

>>216514771
This is your go to is it?
Is that because you're too autistic to greet strangers?

zesty zesty

>>216514762
*exits earth*

>"alright mate can I get a medium latte please"
This may surprise some of you lads but this is actually how you behave in public. It doesn't make you a sperg.

>>216514818
creating countries out of nothing in all corners of the globe is a bit more complex and impressive than a splash of blue paint on the town hall

Got my new Barbour lads

fuck off asking for hobby suggestions just do something you want to do or don't do anything. do you think some incel on /brit/ does a secret hobby you've never heard of

>>216514798
Mum does what for me? I just said I’ve never claimed in my life how would she claim for me??

>>216514833
acting like gay in a woman's knitting club
acting like a gay in a hiking or camping club
acting like a gay in a boxing club
acting like a gay in a play
acting like a gay in a nightclub
alcoholics anonymous but you're not really an alcoholic like in fight club

>>216514869
>latte
alri homosexual

>>216514873
not to me when that era has passed and im the one living in an ugly shithole while mario and pierre get to open their windows each day and live in a fairytale

rorke doing a zesty gay porn dance

>>216514877
Would knock you spark out

why do they keep 'accidentally' releasing migrant rapists from prison? are they purposely provoking the nation to see how far they can go or what

>>216514896
and then acting gay at alcoholics anonymous i forgot to mention silly me

>>216514831
No#
*smiles smugly to self*

>walk into Tesco garage and up to the till
>have to keep it moving so I'm swift and prompt with what I want
>"fags"
>the two wogs behind the til jump the counter and kick the shit out of me
Yeah thanks mate very smooth

>>216514924
Why is that then mate

>>216514927
to make mistakes is human, rorke.

>>216514719
wanting to build fast and cheap on one hand, and an insidious ideology that equates beauty with conformity and oppression on the other

have you ever had the displeasure of reading an academic essay about how beautifying architecture is anti-working class?

>>216514716
for me the solution is to do a retaliatory laugh far too loud, to scare them

>>216514818
usa, carribean, canada, australia and new zealand mog us

>>216514892
just assumed parents can claim for their disabled children that aren't functioning enough to claim for themselves

>>216514481
Love hearing how much Baltic peoples hate Russia kek

accidentally releasing a horny gay brown rapist channel migrant into keir starmers bedroom at night for the 9th time, quite the butterfingers me

>>216514845
I don't drink Lattes but yeah, I only say what needs to be said, nothing more, and keep it pushing when talking to service workers.

Let me guess, you torture every unfortunate soul you come across with mindless chit-chat?

actually im not even wearing a g string
actually its just a regular underwear
and im wearing short shorts on top of the underwear
and im wearing tight tights on top of the short shorts!

>walk into the pub for a pint
>barman: "what ye 'aving lad?"
>"alcohol"
>don't break eye contact until he moves onto the next punter
Why didn't you lads tell me socialising was this easy?

>>216514306 (OP)
>>216514345

can these fucking niggers stop launching fireworks already
you've been doing it for FIVE HOURS
it's not THAT interesting
even the intended audience (5 year old children or the severely autistic) would have gotten bored by now

I have several secret hobbies you have never heard of. Paragliding. Totemcraft. Blood calligraphy. Nasal tobacco. Urethral sounding. Frisbee golf.

one alcohol please bar keep, post haste!

>>216514913
*opens my windows*

>>216514995
baltic is butthurt belt core, the bitch of civilizations with the exceptions of lithuania

>>216515026
this
I want to go to bed ffs there should be a law against fireworks after half 8

>>216515026
Let's face it: you'll do fuck all about it.

>>216515034
Fuck off with that mindless chitchat

>>216514927
feel like its probably always been the case except now it's getting reported more

>>216515026
Go tell them yourself


You won't


We both know why

one lager

>>216515026
i hope they ping one through your window you pompous little toad

>>216515065
Hello DTFIC

mam's served up a right bonfire night treat

>Cider. Pint of.
Then you keep it moving.

>>216514970
no our cities are quite ugly too. at least you're never that long of a train ride away from something stunningly beautiful, no matter where you are

>>216515091
why the fuck would you say it like that

>ill
>go to gp
>time is of the essence so avoiding pointless chit-chat
>what seems to be the problem anon?
>"runny poo!"

Laughed at a few of these text posts

lace acorns and nuts with tranquilisers then collect the grey squirrels to strap them to fireworks

>>216514306 (OP)
>baddiedem
>>216514345
>gyaldem
Mad how negrified brits are

>>216515120
DO NOT DO THIS

why are you all ordering drinks like the bartender has shagged your wife

The name's cider. Pint of cider.

>can I get a medium latte please mate
>no
what do you do lads?

>>216515120
Very canadian post

>>216515065
he doesn't want solutions he just wants to vent he's a fellow girlie! *nailpaint emogi*

>be me
>have phimosis
>order an escort
>she starts with the mindless chitchat
>tell her sex
>bewilderment flashes across her face
>"SEX"
>she takes two steps back
>"SEX" I repeat, louder
>she's visibly shaken despite me trying to keep it moving
>pleading at this point
>"SEX! SEX... SEX"
>she grabs her shit and leaves
>also I have phimosis and I'm on the nofap noporn

Heathermong is 43 btw

>>216515143
would spark him/her straight out if someone tried this with me. but I look like a hard cunt so they never would

I entered a garage once for a new tyre and the man behind the counter shouted "NO WALK INS!". I turned around without saying anything and left. Could hear people laughing in the reception area as I went through the door. :(

>>216515143
who does that literally no one

>>216515076
Good evening

when i check into a hotel i just say my name
it catches them a little off guard to begin with but thats all the information they need

>>216515155
screaming

>>216514840
Cheadle mentioned

jeet me jeet me

>>216515094
>at least you're never that long of a train ride away from something stunningly beautiful
youse mog us hard, we have some hills and green. you've got mountains, prairies, massive lakes, snow and fauna. the average road in a uk town is bumpy and uneven winding around some uproot soil with the grimmest grey sky imaginable

>walk into the pub
>"oh hello anon, I haven't seen you in a while. what are you having?"
>"beer"
>place 3 pound coins on the bar
>keep it moving and walk out

hi how's it evening can i have a pint of clarling

>>216515143
i'd be fuming, utter fuming.

One young kiddie on Cake cried all the water out of his body. Just imagine how his mother felt. It's a fucking disgrace.

This has been the most depressing year in recent British history, in my opinion.

>asked gpberg to heal my sore knee
>he said no
What do I do now?

>>216515189
drugmongs on /brit/ cheering on this crusader of libertarianism

lol, calling the baddies "fit" gotta be my favorite brit slang

>>216515257
keep it moving

>youse
Trying too hard typing like that. Same energy as those Scottish freaks who type in their “accent”

going bed, hopefully no more zombie dreams

>>216514612
looks like the start of every single one of heathermong's dreams

what is 190 trying to spam into a gimmick now then?

>>216515189
A woman I know was taking it so often that she lost the ability to walk for about a year.

>can i have a pint of lager please?
>i don't know, can you?

we're aw fae somewhere x

>>216515257
stalk him

>whip the car into the mechanics
>throw the keys in his direction
>"tyres"
>get in
>drive off
no time for mindless chit chat, we keep it moving

>>216515279
Remember, remember

>>216515223
makes you wonder why our ancestors stayed here
who sees a grim cold rainy island where we gradually stripped away most of the cool wildlife like bears/wolves anyway and thinks hmm if im going to be a peasant why stay here when i might as well be one in france where i can see the alps or get some sun

yes I am here

what is a DTFIC?

>>216515299
hi

>>216515290
Realistically lads how do I reply to this without sounding like a complete tit?

>>216514869
Usually if they say no, I either look at them with half a grin and say "why not/how" or "what" depends what mood I'm in.
Also if done with a straight face, it alerts them to my power level, at which point they usually go "haha just joking, one whatever coming right up" (they assume I'm autistic and can't understand jokes/sarcasm)

>>216515065
because they're braindead retards who resort to violence nearly instantly, as the only language they can speak or understand?

>>216515318
ssh
sssssh. got to roll a cig to go play horse game

>>216515308
chatgpt down?

>>216515323
yeah i can

there isn’t enough hours in the fucking night.
I want to be up at 5 am but I don’t want to be going bed at 9 pm

>being able to afford going to the pub in 2025
Hello millionaires

>>216515308
Dunfermline Town Football international Club.
/brit/ adopted a football team while you were gone

>>216515291
yay!

sick of learning history, it's well time to start on herstory.

>>216515065
good post CAnada this one did numbers!
Canadians would go tell them in Canada

>>216515323
Lean over the bar and put the tap in your mouth and start sucking

>>216515351
>up at 5am
Why do you do that to yourself?

>>216515329
>alright mate can I get a medium latte please
>No
>why not?
Might as well tell everyone in the shop you're a virgin

bought some muffins

going on a quiz show but refusing to answer personal question, as it bares no weight on the scoring of the quiz, and quite frankly, seems out of place in a quiz show

>>216515296
remeber what

I just think that if there was an auto-uma carrot button to do runs on 10x speed on a bell curve it would make lots of money for them, and do a timeout thing so you cant go sleep with it on because that would be a crime (or enabling people to gatcha in their sleep should be illegal)

>>216515360
I was watching New Zealand TV the other day and all the adverts were in a foreign language.

Curious really.

*looks at you expectantly*

>>216515391
Early bird gets the worm n all that

>>216515380
imagine dick riding a country

>>216515360
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRQOtfLOyEU

baddie demmies AND gyally demmies mentioned

>>216515436
spiritually I am Canadian
Canadians are cuter automatically too (+ cuteness if they are). lots of people dickride their own countries. imagine only fucking black guys - like someone going around saying "yeah im Korean dick only". imagine dragons. suck my dick "imagine"

>>216515433
that's just their accent

>quiz show
>old contestants
>win 50,000
>'me and my wife and finally go on that cruise ship'
it not bloody right, there should be an background check on what these runts are gonna spend the pounds on

only 2 good posters itt right now
they know who they are

>>216515380
Thank you four is indeed a number

I went in a pub in a quiet village in Devon once, and the barman (he was probably the landlord too) was sat on a sofa asleep, so I poured me and my gf a drink and slapped a fiver on the bar, went outside cos it was the summer, he was still inside when I went back in so I did the same, another fiver, finished the second drink and then buggered off ha

>>216515189
i dont understand how people even start doing hard drugs like that, what did they expect to happen?

it me

>>216515491
...im tachyon?

>>216515491
um hi x

got shagged up the arse so hard i can barely walk

>>216515433
were you watching the maori tv channel

>>216515500
It's a nice story, but I don't believe you.

>>216515500
landlord gatchaing chachig moneyyyy in his slep!!! boomer lyfestyle
>>216515505
ohh OK tachyon
o.o

>>216515434
Early wageslave is getting fucked in the arse regularly more like. I work too, but I don't get out of bed until at least 7am.

black pinkie in your area

if you dont have a massive cock then you cant sexually please a woman
they will just pretend

>>216515223
we do have natural beauty but far less history and man-made beauty. everything is generic with no old ancient pockets like little roman or medieval bits, and no great museums. coming back here even from the uk is depressing, although i guess visitors tend to have rose coloured glasses and the grass is always greener and all that

>>216515542
What's that

>>216515483
Michael McIntyre's The Wheel had a contestant pop up a few weeks ago and steal the final question to win £68k after someone else had cleared the entire thing. He said he was spending it all on a lads holiday for him and his mates while the one who cleared the wheel was planning on donating a chunk of it to a cancer charity after his daughter died lmao

>>216515534
Not my problem.

man got gyalie on me
op block, bally on me

>>216515549
nice if they pretend though it means they care about you

>>216515542
you only made that post because I thought about her (white woman)

>>216515549
Not true actually

man tryna call me a backup dancer

When I was 16 I lied about my age and signed up to adultfriendfinder.com looking for someone to let me suck their knob. Got loads of replies and when I was close to meeting someone he sent a message asking if I was sure this is what I wanted. I panicked and never returned to the site

>people go walking around in "op" (enemy gang) blocks
>none of them dead before like 20. barely even any
but seriously what is their excuse for this

>>216515563
Why didn't you attempt to wake him? Cough or move a chair?

dont get donating to cancer charity. what, we just gonna stop cancer dead in it's tracks if we offer it money?

new gimmick, become a weeb but for india

>>216515536
Good for you I guess I just have bigger dreams than you.

>>216515549
The same way you pretend to be a good poster?

>>216515399
Checked.
Unfortunately I just broke up with the gf of 5 years a few months ago so have actually had sex more times than I cared to count.

sir king kong

>>216515549
I have an average sized willy and I've had several women say I'm the best they've ever had in bed. Don't need a horse cock to please them, it's about technique and understanding how their bodies work.

>>216515542
sounds quite repellent tbqh

never been in a pub in my life

anyone tried any irl gimmicks?

I've been poo-posting, shit-posting and fart-posting on /brit/ for 11 years now

arsewank on the cards?

wonder what happened to gfof4yearsmong

>>216515482
>>216515532
It was the accent. This was the advert I thought was foreign but it's actually all in English.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y74_JQBy2wQ

>>216515607
Cos he looked like he would be a grumpy old sod if someone woke him up.

>>216515656
he licked an escorts pussy recently

>>216515549
no, most women aren't like your mom

>>216515245
Every city centre across the country is flooded with them

Anyone remember the asexual gf gimmick?

>>216515616
Your dream is an ugly Porsche? Deary me.

First time I went clubbing all my friends kept saying I looked very nervous

>>216515687
Yes I remember when you used to spam this

>>216515121
>pot calling the kettle black
emmy(gyaldem) used roadman slang on twitter last night, deleted tweet tho

>>216515297
they didn't know, if they knew they boats would've been chockered full

>>216515553
as a history enjoyer I'd drop the local bits of history for pic related in a second

>>216515684
Not just that, it's everything.

>>216515662
why were you watching this, why am I watching it, why am i dancing and jumping on the couch listening to it

>he's 40
what was it like hunting stegosauruses with julius ceasar? lmao

oh this isn't ok

>walk into the dentist
>Burst into the surgery room
>Exclaim "teeth" at the dentist
>Walk out and slap 50 quid on the reception desk
Don't care, we keep it moving

>>216515726
We won the Euros though.

>>216515722
I don't get it

>>216515684
They just stand around on their phones

>>216515737
good post kid

>not even summer yet
>already dying from the heat
It's over

>>216515751
says you've got a face like a bucket of smashed crabs

>>216515747
mental how chopped she is

>>216515735
Is this a popular advert in your country?

your all retarded

>>216515751
Crabs in a bucket. You see someone wanting more out of life and your first reaction is to mock him

haha

tfw no Porsche

can't even remember the last time i didn't sit down to do a wee. might as well have a fanny

i wish i was a pretty girl

>>216515802
yeah, fag

>>216515750
My gf calls it "ponytail bollocks football".

>>216515779
no idea, most people under 50 don't really get exposed to advertising anymore. Ive never seen that ad

Foden just did quite possibly the zestiest celebration of all time

Tis the birth of a new gimmick lads, beautiful

>>216515802
better safe than sorry. never know when a little poo is going to slip out

>>216515793
if that's your ambition in life i find it a bit sad

>>216515773
I'm actually quite handsome, I've been told.

>>216515835
“You sensed that you should be following a different path, a more ambitious one, you felt that you were destined for other things but you had no idea how to achieve them and in your misery you began to hate everything around you.”

>>216515835
Didn’t say that though did you

Hey niggers, why are you black? (no reply last thread so reposting)

>>216515849
UMMY x

return to aristocracy

>>216515854
what's ambitious about wanting an ugly car
i've got one already

viagra man did you have to tell your gp that you started using it? Should I start with Sildenafil

>>216515824
Is it true that him, Jude and Trent are into a bit of bumming?

>>216515830
I just see the same old shite I always see here

>>216515706
Did he score?

>>216515867
its OK all the pol/r9k posters must post all of their shit twice

>>216515480
chimpanzee that monkey news

>>216515809
u can do it hun x

tobes >.< xx

>>216515873
Why are you acting obtuse

>walk into bathroom
>Shout "poo" at the toilet
>Turn around and shit myself as I walk out
Don't care, we keep it moving

>>216515912
do you think "ambition" is defined by the amount of cars and watches you have

calling crab in a bucket when someone laughs at your shitty little boy vroom vroom car

>>216515779
The only tv anyone watches here is the chase and the 6pm news
And that's mostly boomers

damn dude your days is just sitting here saying things hopig your friendship circle jois in
but the only rplies you get is "kys" and those at the dogshit persona #2371401323. thats sad!

sir poo

>>216515824
dortmund pretty much gave foden the red carpet, easy chance of his life

>>216515947
giggletv

you really think that I would join in on your things when you post that garbage (and never get replies also)

RORKE

>>216515824
He loves sticking that tongue out haha x

>>216515937
No and I never said that. So I’ll ask again why are you acting obtuse

>>216515976
get stuck in laaaa
poo! willy! bum!

would be so cool in kim just allowed access to the internet and 4chan in north korea, their general would be the best one for months

reminder to report the uma posters

>>216515966
that's my wife

>>216515976
shut up toby

The Witcher just had to go woke didn't it.
This 4th season is not quite hitting the spot. Too much drama and not enough action.
When the game comes out I'm not really looking forward to whoring it up and boozing gambling and fighting as much as before, alas, I digress

nah!!

>>216516001
Imagine how they'd react to women with willys

2 thousand BBC's killed in Sudan from the RSF. When will the world wake up?

>>216516004
reminder that you are not welcome here (because youre black)

>>216516040
transgenderism is world ide, because its natural. they always would have them

we need another truly great high fantasy RPG

Movie

tobuscus

>>216516013
your unarchived karaoke??

fearful that i may be demonically possessed

Fuck I thought Traitors was on tonight

"YJK" is ESP which is real

>>216516063
agree, all this technology and nothing as cosy as dragon quest 8

>>216516018
digress on digresslord

>>216516040
i heard in russia some of the north korean soldiers sent there were gooning, porn is banned in north korea though

Friendly reminder that anime is for nonces.

>>216515976
>garbage
FOY

I am anime.

"YJK" is ESP, which is real

>>216516072
fucking hell, it's like those times were from another universe when I think about it, so many can change in over a decade

>>216516018
henry cavill left because it was going to shit so it was never going to be good. in the new game you're ciri so you'll be scissoring the whores

>>216516103
I will not take this transgression lightly, transgresslord

>>216516149
>>216516149

horse sound effect (YKTO) .mp3
horse sound effect (YKTO) .mp3
horse sound effect (YKTO) .mp3
horse sound effect (YKTO) .mp3
or ot too many

Poo award