Thread 49234046

Futo

Futo

Futo

>>49234046 (OP)
marry

fuck

kill

>>49234154
Thee can't killeth an imm'rtal!

>>49234267
>Thee
That's the objective case.
>killeth
Third person suffix.
>imm'rtal
Contractions of this sort usually occur between identical sounds, for example in the word "ever".

What you most likely meant to write was: Thou canst not kill an immortal!

>>49234307
Thanks for the corrections, Futo!

>>49234307
>canst not
English had double negation in the past?

>>49234307
Smart and clever Futo-chan!

>>49234307
Futo chan!!! I'm a big fan!!

>>49234154
Can I also fuck the one I kill?

>>49237746
Not only did it have double negatives, it had triple and quadruple. Theoretically you could extend this indefinitely based on how much you wanted to emphasise the no, but more than three definitely makes you sound silly (perfect for Futo)

Futa

>>49234046 (OP)
Futa Futo

>>49239914
Futonari

I find Futo ultraerotic, and yet when time comes to slop up some filthy smut of her, I can never come up with anything concrete.

>>49240201
What do you think stops you?

>>49240201
She stands out as one that could easily be easily tricked, yet she is so endearing that I wouldn't have it in me to make manipulative art of her.
Yet that same quirkiness of hers makes it hard to create more conventional pieces. It feels like it undermines her charms.
I'm rarely in the camp of "You can't lewd this girl" and I do think Futo is very pretty, but I can agree that its a bit of a delicate affair if I wanted to be truly satisfied with it.

>>49240733
try this: make faceless guy try to trick her, midway he kind of regret being mean, and in the end she says she was just pretending to be retarded.

>>49240201
Lolimate cracked the code, that's why nobody has attempted a Futo doujin since.

Futo couldn't save /jp/ from being erased during the first of April! Futo is a fraud!

>>49234307
Futospeak is hard...

>>49240201
She has no tits or ass and speaks weird

>>49240201
For the hu's I like i find a fetish and explore it with them, try to get something you want to explore using Futo's lewd plate!

>>49241824
>She has no tits
You need to stop believing baseless rumors, dude.

>>49243183
Doctored image.

>>49240256
If I had to put a finger on it... She's a complex character in my headcanon; long story short: torn between her blank-slate "second youth" in reincarnation and a lingering, indelible attraction to the distasteful, unbecoming sort of political intrigue she'd engaged in at Shotoku Taishi's side. Also, Tojiko's mum, as her historical namesake/inspiration was.
Integrating all this into smut is, let's say, a task. Whereas not integrating it feels like resorting to threadbare templates. Which, loving her as I do, feels like a disservice in turn. "I like her too much" would be my pretentious way to put it.

>>49240586
Undeniable proof that Buddhism is evil and twisted.

>>49240586
Futo promises retribution!

>>49249112
Is Futo a member of the Caesar's Legion?

>>49249140
>"We will see how pure you are when you are nailed to the wall of the Human village, your body facing west so you can watch your temple burn."
Maybe.

>>49249140
Ave, true to Miko!

futo is a 5th stage boss. that means shes a candidate to being a protagonist / playable character

>>49252205
Dumb Futo dropping a vital piece of evidence, they're going to fingerprint that torch

I want to steal her hat!

>>49252849
The joke is on them. Futo has no fingerprints!

>>49249378
Lets say i actually become a playable character, i'll come to you and ask for your help if anything happens.

>>49249378
She's playable in the fighting games just like Orin is available in Th19
Shou's still waiting, though...

The end of Futo.

Futo!

Die Futo!

>>49265137
Yes, the Futo!

>>49234046 (OP)
God I want to bully her. Bully her for the stupid way she talks. Bully her for her stupid hat. Bully her for being so stupid. Bully her until she cries.

>>49266594
This anon will become a human candle

>>49266594
Anon wants to get set on fire! How fun!

>>49266624
>>49266634
now kiss

Futo

>>49266624
>>49266634
Futo would be to paralyzed from the shock of my bullying to do shit. I WILL break her.

Punching Futo in the face and knocking off her ugly hat!
Pulling back Futo's fingers until she cries and begs you to stop!
Kicking Futo in the stomach until she pisses herself!

We don't bully Futo around these parts!!!

I’d rather hide her panties and watch her confused reaction!

>>49268165
Like she'd even notice!

>>49268172
Did you mean that she was preparing disposable panties just in case? Futo is so smart!

Futo is a classy lady and as such does not wear panties

これから毎日家を焼こうぜ?

Futo wears a fundoshi and she loves to show her cheeks.

Now look at THIS

Futo deserves to be body shamed until she becomes anorexic.

>>49272519
Holy shit...

futo a bunbun

>>49276332
Someone as small as her shouldn't be this smug!

>>49276437
The smaller they are, the harder they smug.

>>49276300
And they say Taoists are too "old fashioned"...

>>49276332
Source?

>>49276332
I want to bite this troublemaker's cheeks...

>>49283795
here you pyon
fair warning, it's pyorn
https://files.catbox.moe/g4zmdj.jpg

>>49283899
Thanks!

>>49283824
pedophile!

Cuto

>>49286934
But futo is an old man larping as a teen...

Midget

the new face of RADICAL taoism

>>49297305
HEEEEEELP ME BYAKUREN.

Sluto

Puto

Pluto

mononobe yes futo

>>49314749
moyesyesbe yes futo!

what's with futo and plates? do i need to beat ten desires to unlock the lore?

Here comes the train...

>>49316794
You have to read her entry in Symposium of Post-Mysticism.

Futo molested me when the site was down...

>>49318644
What the fuck? Why you? Why not me?

>>49318644
You covered yourself in peanut butter, didn't you.

>>49318644
Lucky you.

Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo
Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo
Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo
Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo
Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo Futo

I missed you all
I missed Futo
;_;

>>49331581
gay

>>49331581
>you all
Looking at this thread... who?

>>49337475
All the Futo believers!

>>49337475
Me! I like her hat!

triple futo

>>49340109
no, just double

>>49340925
I wish Futo wasn't so difficult to lewd. I'd be making more slop of her.

>>49337475
ME! ME! ME!

>>49341027
You don't need to make leader for good sloppa, OP's pic is good sloppa for example

>>49344164
but I wanna be the leader.....

>>49344164
Lewds*, I love phoneposting.

I hope we get a cute Futo on the bottom of the thread this year

>>49344164
nah, non lewd slop has no intrinsic value

Stop trying to lewd Futo

>>49344837
Futo is a rapist.

>>49344837
Futo is naturally obscene. Look at those sleeves!

>>49344965
Very flexible, she would be a great arcobat

I can't believe Futo is going to die!

baketh to page 1!

>>49347888
Futo never dies! She just reincarnates!

>>49347930
Poor thing..

Make a post entirely and only in Futospeak

>>49352279
STORM!

EARTH!

HAVING LEFT THE LAND NIGIHAYAHI LOVED, THE HOLY MAIDEN GUARDING THE CROWN PRINCE ON HIS WAY TO TAO'S ENLIGHTENMENT, I, MONONOBE NO FUTO, HAVE NOW APPEARED!

Futo.

>>49354433
She looks like she cried a lot recently.

>>49355998
The ice cream...

>>49359248
TAISHI
MY ICE CREAM

>>49359248
She's crying over ice cream? What a baby.

>>49359429
She is pure of heart anon.

>>49234046 (OP)
BURN IT

>>49344389
I don't wanna blow your mind bro, but nothing has intrinsic value.

>>49355998
oh yeah haha that's my fault. i've been making her cum so hard she's gets tears in her eyes haha soz

>>49234046 (OP)
Futo's fortune slip is the coolest besides Koishi's (UNKNOWN) and Cirno's (horrible luck but you're the strongest so you can get over it same way Reimu does. Reimu's is just boring law of attraction). Stays at 69 and fortune is "whatever you make it to be"

>>49366250
Coolto!

futo

Pyon

>>49378712
This is the second time we've put bunny ears on Futo this thread. We've grown very adept at it.

>>49378777
>second
Which one is the first?

futo futo

no more futo...

I found more Futo!

>>49387648
Crown prince x futo!?

>>49389251
No way, I ship Futo with faceless bald men and the Crown Prince with myself.

>>49389590
>myself
gay

lick the plate

don't lick it

I love them big.

he he he porque vos la ves, gay

no one likes futo...

the end of futo!

Oyasumi futo

>>49366250
Futo makes her own destiny!

>>49413533
I just wish her destiny didn't involve many flames.

>>49413533
Her only destiny is to spend eternity in hell for illegally extending her own life.

>>49420205
Not if she become a celestial first, you can't call out someone's cheating if they have already won.

>>49420205
Futo has not done a single illegal thing in her naturally long life!

>>49423757
This. There is no way a hermit like her would cheat at gambling.

>>49426510
TECHNICALLY, Futo wasn't participating in the actual game, that one time. TECHNICALLY, she was just doing some feng shui exercises near the bar. TECHNICALLY she may not even have known that a game of any sort was underway nearby.

>>49426517
Futo, we know that your hypocrisy knows no bounds.

>>49426554
The only thing of Futo's that know no bounds are the length of her sleeves.

Futo could just convert to Buddhism and live an easy life.

>>49427790
delving into futo's sleeves to find her little handsies... haaahhhh haaaah.....

>>49432530
yeah, futo is dumb like that

Hail Futo!

>>49435259
PREPARE for the consequences of your words!

>>49432614
All you'll find is a zippo lighter and a half eaten bagel.

>>49446184
What about the plate? Didn't she hide it there, too?

>>49446184
>half eaten bagel
Everyone knows Futo keeps her emergency bread under her hat. That's why its shaped like that.

summer futo

>>49461865
Futo has become more daring with her choice of swimwear.

>>49464017
And that's a good thing!

Until next year, Futo.

Back to page 1!

Every time I set out to do anything with Futo, I end up putting her in a bikini or a bathrobe. What's a possible cute and lewd outfit that would mesh with Futo's futoness well?

>>49479001
Fie fie, Anonymous. Prithee, convey unto me: hadst thou in thine earnest—by thy most severe judgement, ay, by thy soberest and soundest reckoning—estimated that Futo might so soon have shuffled off this forth chan? Tush... what a grand and intoxicating innocence.

>>49432614
Thy words conjure many a honeyed reverie before the minde's eye, aye, t'is a pleasure for the wit to dream upon. A rosen flush of blood hath found it's way to my very own cheeks. Futo a cute.

>>49317006
The natural consequence of romancing any Touhou in existence is developing a case of liver failure no more then 2 years later...

Live!

>>49481075
You forgot about Sanae. Although being with her probably would force you to drink with Kanako, so your liver will die anyway.

>>49481075
But what if i'm a non-drinker.

>>49486676
Too bad. There is NO ONE and I mean NO ONE in Gensokyo for you. Even the only non alcoholic, Sanae, lives with two competitive alcoholics who will tease you and bully you until you give in and start drinking, too, just like the other anon said.
Better start getting used to the taste of sake, because everyone will force you to drink alcohol.

>>49486717
Wait! There is the head-boddhist who is nondrinker and promotes abstinence.

>>49486811
True, but I'm gonna guess her followers will make you drink to exhaustion if you ever stumble upon them during their "Buddhist duty break".

>>49486831
Anon could gauge his own eyes to prevent that, "see no evil" and such, you know? Being blind is unpleasant, sure, but won't kill him as fast as liver failure.
Or he could start drinking...

>>49486811
She may not drink, but all her followers have been stated to drink like crazy when she's not around. If you're with her, you're living with her followers, and you're going to get dragged along with them.

>>49486870
Her followers are also yokais, you will be surrounded by yokais who have been abstaining their desires unattended.

>>49486900
>desires
Of what kind?

>>49486951
Snacks, headpats, hugs, etc
Shou wants sex but no one cares about Shou

>>49486868
Futo's panties...... such modern undergarments........

>>49366020
Thy mind hath omitted, with either an ignorance most brazen or a slip, as on dark ice, the intrinsic value of our Futers!

>>49486957
>headpats, hugs
I would give those to youkai! If Buddhists can grant such opportunities, how can Taoists even compete?
>Shou wants sex
Eww...

Futo is not real.

>>49486717
But what are they gonna do when i'll say "sorry I do not drink alchohol" ?

>>49493983
They will declare their intent and then their spellcard. You better be skillful enough to keep your convictions and not be obliged to drink.

>>49493999
Damn people really take drinking alchohol seriously in Gensokyo, I guess I should lie low then.

Futoball

>>49496366
futaballs

>>49496386
I know she also appeared in TD (and they also share appearances in fightans, huh...), but this is not Mamizou's thread.

>>49490091
If Futo isn't real, then how am I married to her? Checkmate, Buddhists.

>>49496453
You can't marry a plate, dude.

>>49446184
I know she's got a piece of pizza in there somewhere.

>>49383642
futo futo
oh mononobe
you are my candy girl
and you got me wanting you

>>49496366
What's her position?

>>49505456
sluto

>>49505456
>The dialogue

>>49509239
Are you making fun of how Futo talks, nerd?

>>49505456
tfw it's bud inspection day

>>49509239
This umbrella has now been added to the long list of Futo's enemies.

>>49509286
>>49510105
Who do you thinks puts fire off at the Myouren temple? Know your mismatches, miss Funny-words

>>49513075
Hey fuck you, umbrella bitch.

>>49513075
DORK FIGHT

>>49510077
tags: birth

>>49514095
Youmu is a bigger dork though.

micro taoist

We love Taoism here.

>>49523849
Very lappable.

>>49523849
one swing of those udders and futo would suffer a concussion

>>49527742
Indeed. The Dao De Jing isn't a very long read, and available to everyone through the internet. Why not give it at least a cursory glance, or better yet, a read?

>>49533579
I'd rather read Futo doujins.

Futo always pays her taxes like a dork.

>>49538189
Death is not certain for her, she can go easier on taxes then. Escaping both would be too much power for single individual.

>>49534453
I'd rather read Futo fanfics (there are none)

I have replaced Youmu with Futo as my #3 best 2hu.

>>49538314
You can write one!

>>49538963
Congrats! Now read the Dao De Jing!

futo

futofuto

>>49509239
I kinda like how poetic she spoke ngl

>>49549699
>poetic
That's Funglish

RAAAAUUUUGHHHH

>>49556033
Excellent cosplay, Yoshika.

>>49556033
Reimu??????

>>49556033
Mum?!?!?!

>>49560175
Futo with makeup

>>49556033
Futo without makeup

>>49549699
desu I would listen to her taoist lectures both for the way she talks, and for me believing that she has a great adorable voice

>>49560270
Futo is NOT a zombie!

>>49561303
All shikaisen is an undead creature that isn't really different from a zombie.

futo

hey guys what's going on in this thre--

>>49571893
s-source?

>>49575615
1s and 0s

>>49575615
https://files.catbox.moe/suodnv.jpg

>>49570725
futo futo

Futo is a naughty old woman.

>>49589421
Futo is my sugar granny. As in I give her sugar (candy) and she talks like a granny in my vicinity.

Mononobe no fucking Futo!!!

Mononononononono futofutofutofutofuto

I want to Futo.

You can't handle the Futo.

>>49577598
W-what happens next?

>>49599395
Marriage.

>>49602104
You can't marry a deader.

>While there are many ways to become a shikaisen, it seems that the method she used was to "completely abandon the body, transfer the soul into a particular object and, when the time comes, the object will take their form while their corpse becomes the object." The object she used is said to have been a plate.(*3)
If I broke her plate, would she die?
Is this a familiar concept in Chinese myth or something (immortality attached to a physical object)? Pardon my projection but ZUN didn't see D&D liches and go "wow Mr. Gygax, your phylactery is such a nice size" did he?

>>49605209
>If I broke her plate, would she die?
It sounds like you could find it in the first place.

futofeet

>>49605209
>If I broke her plate, would she die?
No. The "trick" in shikai is that inanimate objects have no prescribed lifespan. So, by removing your soul from your human body (which has an expiration date) and placing it in an inanimate object, you dodge the issue of dying of old age. Then, because souls in Touhou are what determines your physical form (as we know from Mokou's condition), the inanimate object over time takes on the "shape" of your soul, while your abandoned body takes on the shape of the object with which you swapped souls. In Futo's case, the plate she inhabited turned into her, while her dead body turned into the plate. It is no more nor less than that now - her former body.

Incidentally, it is likely that the sword that Miko carries around is the same sword she swapped souls with during her shikai. Which makes this LE page extra lewd.

>>49608715
I wanted to bring Miko up too - putting your soul into something meant to hit things doesn't seem too smart, but that sounds irrelevant for shikai. Hitting people with your transfigured corpse is funny though.

hatless futo

>>49615433
hatless futo looks extremely defenseless

>>49615433
Huh. I swear the artist already uploaded this picture years ago and it was tagged as being a cosplayer/trap.

>>49615433
WHO UNDRESSED HER?

>>49605209
There is a Chinese mythological basis.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xian_(Taoism)
>The 4th century CE Baopuzi [..] gives some highly detailed descriptions of xian
>Shījiě xiān
>This is considered the lowest form of immortality since a person must first "fake" their own death by substituting a bewitched object like a bamboo pole, talisman, or a shoe for their corpse.

Would you consider this small woman inherently erotic?

>>49625859
Only a pedophile would think like that.

>>49630918
I doubt she's that young, dude.

futorare

>>49635892
Rare Futos? Where?

>>49615433
>hatless
you disgusting fuck

>>49638263
Here!

>>49234046 (OP)
Futo love Jackalman

Futo love Jackalman

Futo love Jackaman

Futo has been defeated. Her thread ends here!

Futo bump!

Futa Futo.

Fucock

Futo?

I just like saying Futo.
Futo.
Futo.

Triple Futo

>>49670701
The more you say futo, the closer she's to becoming celestial.

>>49680408
Iä! Iä! Futo ftaghn!

>>49680483
>>49680483
What language is this?

>>49682647
Magic voodoo incah incantations to make you quote a post 2 times.

>>49682658
Damn, is this some kind of curse? Can Futo Futo cure it?

>>49682680
VE'LN WEN'FI FUTO VE'KH Ö'KHA, VE'Ö VE'SHO FL'KHUN EI; VE'Ö VE'SHO FL'KHA. ÄÖ KHA... FUTOISUM. FLÄSHYN!

First post was R'lyehian, this is Trashtalk. Only blessings here!

>>49682855
Uhhh namu?

>>49234307
>thou canst not kill an immortal
FOOLHARDY, THOU ART!

no, no, and no. i can't not kill an immortal? as in, i not only can kill one, but i'm always killing them or am obliged to kill at least one one by virtue of being me?

"not" is wrong, it is a double negative. you meant "thou canst killeth an immortal". if you're doing the silly shakespearean bit then at least do it properly. futo is supposed to be from the 7th century though so she'd be indecipherable, something like "gē ealle ne magon slēan unġedȳdelīċne"

>>49686324
Boddhist hands typed this post.

>>49686324
>"gē ealle ne magon slēan unġedȳdelīċne"
Old English is just Old Saxon/Frisian on steroids.

The greater Futo is approaching. I can feel it.

taoism is dead, bye

>>49695225
wow, rude

>>49690504
The Daifuto?!

>>49690504
>>49701267
She is approaching... at LUDICROUS SPEED! *gorogorogorogoro*

>>49703097
SOMEONE STOP HER

I like Taoism. It's very Japanese.

>>49703097
She's going to puke!

>>49715157
Then get your Boddhist ass out of her sight!

>>49715203
what the fuck rude!

Futon

>>49719338
evil

>>49721122
doing evil things with futo in a futon!

>>49721148
No... leave the futon alone...

>>49719338
Wrong, thats a California roll and it is your duty to BITE

Futofeet

>>49719338
What is she scheming!

It's Futover...

>>49730250
Here's where you're wrong. It has never been more FutON!

>>49728715
Marriage!

kuwaeruing futo's futomaki

>>49234046 (OP)
Jackalman no futo

Sex with Futo in a futon!

Sex with futonari Futo futon!

>>49730282
It's Futon like Donkey Futong

The more you say futon, the closer she's to having a good sleep.

>>49738136
Too bad she won't get any sleep since I'll be fucking her all night long, hah!

More Futo
Even More Futo

I need pictures of Futo in pervy costumes. No, her regular clothes don't count.

I can't believe Futo is going to die!

The Great One returns to her eternal slumber... oyasumi!

Oyasumi Futo obaa-san.

This thread's Futo score: 232

>>49753567
How is Futo score calculated?

>>49753610
CTRL+F "Futo" then I add one more because "This thread's Futo score" contains one Futo in it.
I recognize it's a flawed method but its both the fastest and most consistent way.

Sayonara Futo!

Futo you.

Last Futo for Futo.

ctrl + f
Futo
244 matches

EVERYONE LOVES FUTO!

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