Thread 63973601

A portal has opened in your room.

You're compelled to go through it - in one hour. Nothing you can do will prevent you from going through it. You know somehow that beyond the portal, there will be a world of fantasy and magic, not unlike your typical Dungeons and Dragons setting. You will be expected to survive in this world, as an adventurer or otherwise.

You have one hour to prepare. You'll be able to bring anything you can carry on you through the portal. Of what you can reasonably get your hands on within an hour, what do you gather and bring?

>>63973601 (OP)
>beyond the portal, there will be a world of fantasy and magic, not unlike your typical Dungeons and Dragons setting.
Gay

>>63973637
no u

>>63973601 (OP)
Dildos. Rucksacks full of dildos and vibrators of various kinds.

>>63973727
How are you gonna swing that?

>>63973601 (OP)
fuck off

>>63973601 (OP)
1. Thyroid meds.
2. Whatever food I can fit in my pack.
3. Field knife.
4. Cooking tin, fork, spoon, cup.
5. Salt.
6. Water bottles.
7. Change of clothes.
8. Sleeping bag & mat.
9. Game bestiaries.
10. Various meds - aspirin, ivermectin, antibiotics.
11. Sewing kit.
12. Zip ties.
13. Multi tool.
14. Multivitamin.
15. 6 foot pole.

Also I would binge eat as much food as I could before I left.

Goal is to first find water & shelter. Food. A mage who can cure my thyroid, do quests for him. Take levels in whatever gets my eternal youth & immortality, and magic use.

Pic related: it's OP.

>>63973601 (OP)
I find an orc wife and colonize her

One AR15 with one magazine, no spare ammo, and a duffle bags full of thousands of condoms.

>>63973927
>this is my rifle, this is my gun
>this is for fighting this is for fun

>>63973601 (OP)
a half gal of makers mark

>>63973601 (OP)
Backpack
I can probably carry 4 500 round bricks of 22lr
Cheap chinese fuel filter
My Ruger 10/22 in a Magpul hunter stock with a cheap 1x reticle
100 pack container of water purification tabs
Gransfors Bruks American felling axe in a flimsy leather sheath
USN MK2 Ka-bar
A bunch of rolled up shirts and underwear
Several pairs of wool socks.
Leather work boots
Sewing kit with needles
Mess kit

>>63973834
This but skip the thyroid meds and include a takedown 10/22 with like 4 bricks of ammo.

>>63973601 (OP)
Besides a few guns, I'd bring a bunch fentanyl and a bunch of seasonings and sauces. When I got to a small kingdom, I'd wow the king with my guns and then kill him and all of his lords and advisors with the fent. Then I'd take over the kingdom for myself and build a proper army to conquer the world with like Alexander.

>>63973601 (OP)
10/22 with 50k rounds of ammo. I would be a wizard able to cast 50k death spells

>>63973601 (OP)
I don my suit of armor and strap my longsword and dagger on (and a knife). I'll throw a sling on my halberd and bring that as well. And my Timex Ironman watch.

After that it'll be a backpack with a first aid kit, my solar charger, and my laptop and phone with a full download of wikipedia + all my books. Also a flashlight. Then duct tape, zip ties, rubber bands, lighters, water filter, a backup watch. Also a thermometer and a jewelers loupe, the two digital calipers I have, a micrometer, a machinist's square, my pocket digital scale, carbide scribe, and a precision ruler (very important). And my yeti water bottle. Finally a small notebook and pen. Maybe some neodymium magnets if I can find where they are.
Any spare space in the bag will be filled with clothing. Like gaiters and long johns and other shit made out of synthetic materials you can't otherwise get. And a sleeping bag. Maybe a few sticks of gum for good measure.

As for firearms it will be your bog standard ar15 and glock 19, with as many mags as I can carry. And all the precious metal/jewelry I have.

Hopefully I can make it to town without being crushed under the weight of my gear. Or starving to death. I'm not packing any food lol.

>>63974179
Oh wait, I also have one of these collapsible carts. I'll carry that as well and I can set it up on the other side. This way I can carry as much shit as I can possibly lift while still being able to walk (just barely), then just wheel everything around on the other side.

>>63974191
Might as well get a wheelbarrow, because that thing's going to last about five minutes.

>>63974203
Just has to get me to town, then I can buy a donkey or some shit
but I also have a wheelbarrow

I'm bringing my dirt bike and a katana

>>63974230
Jaghatai is pleased

>>63973601 (OP)
a colt detective special
a half pack of cigarettes
matchbook from a seedy hotel
private investigator cards
flask of whatever
$1.35 in change
a lot of regrets
a weakness for long eared dames.

>>63973601 (OP)
Guns aren't that great in DnD unless you homebrew it, I'd be better off finding a way to access magic. Wizarding is hard and boring and sucks so I'll find some horny demon and become a trust fund kid (sorceror)

>>63973601 (OP)
SOMEONE TALK TO ME ABOUT SHOES.

IN THE ENTIRE GENRE OF FANTASY IS IT ALL DARK MUDDY UK ENGLISH "ROADS" WITH MUD PUDDLES 6 INCHES DEEP?

>>63974142
Medieval plate armor can stop .22lr pretty easily. Your 10/22 would be good protection against shit-tier fantasy creatures like goblins, but you're not gonna be a famous wizard with such a weak weapons.

I would bring the wand of magic missile.

>>63973601 (OP)
Run to all three gas stations and the grocery store within 10 minutes of my house and buy all the lighters.. probably enough hard candy to fill a backpack, and if it’s during normal hours try and hit the library to see if they have a good chemistry textbook…. Bring a large water bottle…. Can trade lighters and candy for gold or local currency probably just about anywhere…. Sadly I don’t have a crossbow, but I can bring probably my 10mm m&p along with a couple hundred rounds…. Throw a poncho in on top…. As good a start as I’m likely to get I think.

>>63975309
Your fucking up if you aren’t already wearing boots…. Or you don’t work in a real job.. or your just soft.

after you run out of ammo for the gun you brought, what would be the simplest gun to construct? a matchlock rifle?
assuming you can find a blacksmith to make a barrel and can afford lead ingots, how do you make blackpowder?

>>63975570
A crossbow… or don’t be a pussy and learn archery

>>63973601 (OP)
Two ARs (one to sell), a. handgun, all the spare mags and ammo I can carry, a spare optic battery or two, gold and silver, water, water purification, flashlight and batteries, boots, socks, clothes, dehydrated food, portable solar panel, cord, sleeping bag and a tent. I'd also load up an e-reader and my phone with language, chemistry and engineering books; I have a /k/ archive that should be of use. Having read it, I'd also steal that other Anon's idea and get a bunch of lighters to barter, should be worth a few meals at least.

If I had more time to prep or, better, scout I'd want to grab a mountain bike with panniers or a sturdy cart to help carry that weight. Some modern armor would also be nice. Also, I really hope Common is just English.

>>63975570
Guns are probably already a thing in the setting, yours will just be way better. Reloaders should make sure to grab primers, someone will be able to make use of them.

>boomstick
>chainsaw
Primitive screw heads better listen up.

>>63973601 (OP)
MREs, as many lifestraws as I can buy, a first aid kit, a rifle and sidearm and ammo, as much gold as I can trade for at the pawn shop to impress a dragoness and become her human sex slave...

>>63973601 (OP)
> your typical Dungeons and Dragons setting.


Lost me on plebbitors and normies

>>63973601 (OP)
I've got 20+ pounds of exotic spices in my pantry, and a chest full of seeds for various heirloom tomatoes and chili peppers.

I bring that shit back to a medieval European setting and I could sell the spices for enough to buy a farm, and then grow crops that would make me a fortune. I guess I'd bring a gun too, but fuck being a mercenary. I'll get rich selling spicy food to elves.

>>63976010
>as much gold as I can trade for at the pawn shop to impress a dragoness and become her human sex slave
Now this man is forward thinking

>>63973601 (OP)
I fucked her.
I fucked her sweetly. Discretely.
I fucked her hard, and fast. I fucked her like an animal. I fucked her like a lover.
I fucked her like a whore.
I looked deep in her eyes as I fucked her in rythym to her body's need. I fucked her as I touched her pristine neck, her breasts, her curves, held her hips. I fucked her as I finished deep inside.

What say you now, weapon man?

>>63976070
Nice. I didn’t think about spices…. And yeah we garden so I’ve got a ton of seeds that are probably a good bit more productive and pest resistant than what they may have… and it adds very little weight for the volume….

>>63973601 (OP)
Paracord, water filter, multitool, sewing kit, flint, and a pistol with as much ammo as I can reasonably carry. Maybe a laser pointer if there are sexy catgirls.

>>63975570
Something like a single action army. You could do something simpler but it wouldn't be worth it. All the necessary chemicals were known in the middle ages/early modern period, and the required metallurgy is not too advanced for low production runs.

Or you could, you know, bring a black powder gun with you? Then you'd just have to reload it.

>how do you make blackpowder?
Nice try, officer.
It's fairly simple though. Just 3 ingredients. The difficulty is in making primers, smokeless powder, and other high explosives. For black powder, mercury fulminate should be doable.

Though you'd want to conserve your shots no matter what. And ideally, you'd make everything yourself as to not allow others to steal your tech.

>>63976957
Also, modern guns can run black powder cartridges in a pinch. You just have to do a lot of cleaning.

>muh AR
You are dealing with dragons and monsters and shit. Things with a lot of mass and potentially armor. And you are dealing with them in confined spaces - dungeons and shit. And you have to worry about ammo.

The logical answer is a shotgun.

>>63976957
>nice try, officer
there's no way it's illegal to make blackpowder since you're allowed to purchase it.

>>63973601 (OP)
Do ask the wizard who created the portal why can't he just purchase books and advanced tech from our world, why does he need cannon fodder?

>>63973601 (OP)
Nothing's stopping me from just going back through the portal after an hour. I'll just take whatever I want between as I please.
If not, then assuming the exit is within a day's travel to a reasonably safe town survival is still trivially easy. It's not like you have to be a suicidal dragon slaying adventurer, and a rifle and handgun is more than adequate for human bandits and fantasy trash mobs you might run into. Aside from food and all of the ammo in my house:
>watch
>cart, duffel bag, and USGI surp rucksack with my bugout bag contents transferred to it
>several changes of clothes
>loads of books
>tomato and other vegetable seeds like >>63976070 mentioned
>computer and electronics if I can buy a solar charger from the closest store within an hour
>tools and a stove, pot, and pan
>stove
>water filters and purification tablets

>>63976975
Shotguns aren't the answer precisely because you have to worry about ammo. You might want Real Fuckin' NATO for some enemies, but 5.56 can't be beat for effect:weight on many of the things you'll encounter. As for dragons, if you don't have anti-aircraft or anti-tank weapons your response should be to hoof it because you still aren't doing anything with a 12 gauge. Maybe a punt gun if you can get one within an hour.

>>63978322
>Shotguns aren't the answer precisely because you have to worry about ammo
Wrong. You're going to have a much better tine trying to reload and maintain a shotgun in a medieval/renaissance society vs. an AR.

>>63978403
Maintain? Sure, if we're talking about a manual action or a blowback that can run in BP. Reloading? Not really since primers are the sticking point either way and you can carry less to start with a shotty. And that's ignoring the fact that shotguns are the opposite of what you want when dealing with anything armored in the first place so the premise is flawed from the start.

>>63978403
How much ammo can you carry for a shotgun realistically? 200 rounds in a duffel bag? For the same weight you can carry 2000 rounds of 22lr and a Ruger 10/22.
You don't have to worry about maintenance, you're going to run out of ammo long before you need maintenance.

>Run to the store and buy all the soap and cleaning, and washing products
>Also grab all the spices they have
>Sell on to nobles for a huge amount of gold
>Hire protection

>>63978504
We're not talking about modern plates here, we're talking fantasy armor. And again, it's enclosed dungeons and you're effectively dealing with big game. I would rather have buckshot than a regular AR for big, meaty targets.

>primers are the sticking point either way
You aren't going to go through as many shells as you would 556, and they all use 1 primer each.

>>63978537
There's no world in which .22 is a good choice here.

>>63978580
Use your knowledge to create a musket, sell musket and powder, tools, lead balls to a professional military, ask for a harem in return
>Help I am drowning in pussy

you can bring an AR and a shotgun, you know

>>63978580
>We're not talking about modern plates here, we're talking fantasy armor.
Yeah, that's why intermediate rifle calibers stand a chance. Shot is absolutely not going to perform better against anything hard or even generically "tough" enough to serve as armor, and if it could penetrate a rifle round would penetrate better, what you're saying doesn't make any sense. For any animal protected by more than sheer mass you'd still want slugs over buckshot, too.

>>63973601 (OP)
>Shotgun+Buck00+Slug(Easy to reload will last years)
>Big book on meds so i become the royal psysichian
>Big book on strategy/Metalurgy/Alchemical concotion(Read chemical reaction)/Guns/weapons
If you can last enough you become the right hand man of a king
>Jist industrialise the kingdom and have your forces have musket, and the close guard repeating muskets and cool cannon siege engines

Most dnd and dnd-like settings already have renaissance level firearms.

>>63978669
>Show them the power of Steam engines and spit out chemical weapons, artillery and ww1 tier weapons
Ez

>>63978678
the wizard illuminati will have you killed for that

>>63978686
Probably, but they wont know how to read my books so theyll have to necromancy back to the living.
Than ill get a huge trainstation, the coal dewatering macchine and get cool 1850 tech rolling in.
Simply the logistics that afford me+ Haber bosch agriculture(More non malnurished rifle holders)+Haber Gas in artillery would make my nation worse than any wizard ever.
And wed have cool dreadnoughts and Uboats and WW1 style planes and early computers

>>63978686
They can ponder these orbs

>>63978710
And imagine the level of power the radio+One battleship would give you.
Scarry thoughts you could literaly explode mages far away before they can even see you

High quality duct tape, dollar store pregnancy tests and 10,000 hits of proper 90’s-ass ecstasy.

>>63978860
>Raping my way through another world blitzed off my ass on the good molly

>>63978860
You and >>63976228 need to meet up and go slay. At least make sure to get him some catnip though.

That's like literally the plot of Ultima, asshole.

>>63973601 (OP)
My S&W Model 27
All of the .357 and .38 ammo I have
Reloading tools
Fuckload of primers
Solar panel
Phone
A bunch of charging cables
Download a bunch of books on practical sciences and reloading manuals onto my phone
All of the dried food I can reasonably carry
7 gallons of water
Lifestraw
Mess kit
Bedroll
Firestarting kit
Camp axe
Bowie knife
Game Boy Advance with flashcart

I am ready to thrive in the D&D world.

>>63975987
>Shop smart, shop S-mart.
Was thinking the exact same thing.

>>63973601 (OP)
2 ar’s, 1911, g22, g30, shield, rm1c, 7000rounds, wagon, backpacking gear, box of knives, xes and tomahawks, cleaning supplies, sharpening supplies.

>>63973601 (OP)
I'd bring my Police magnum 870 and as many shells as I can carry. I either die quickly or live long enough to get a tsundere elf waifu.

>>63973601 (OP)
BTW, that cover related for the OP is for a book called The Time of the Dark, the first in the Darwath Trilogy by Barbara Hambly. Pretty solid fantasy read.

If that was the world I was going into, I would pack a LOT of shit that makes very hot, very bright fire. VERY fast. Also, I have a few Big Ass Knives. Guns would be highly ineffective in that world. (well, against the main monsters in the trilogy ... a reliable 9 mm with a maintenance kit and one or two thousand rounds would be handy and overkill for everything else other than wizards)

>>63978710
>>63978723
Mages would do more sabotage work behind the scenes with their hirelings (adventurers) against you while you set up shop.

Actually, there was a story/self-fiction called Titans on Literotica where a scifi mech pilot and his mech dimension dropped into a fantasy world and the results (aside from the cuckquean orgies and sex scenes) are hilarious.

The series devolves into vampiric simping for one of the cast though, so I started skipping whole paragraphs. Fucking porn, amirite?

>>63982794
Spray some napalm on those sons of bitches

>>63974203
No they're fine, plus prestige item.
Alternator from car and battery, emergency power bricks and 1tb HDD of survival manuals and shit, AK, all 1300+ rounds, Mosin, all 5k rounds, netbook in Toughcase, to run HDD, 2 months MRES, some clothes, a sword, home made record player and records. Solar cell. That's the wagon.

>>63975279
He's a hard man. He's gonna make it through. Bring nothing but a wagon of whiskey. aside from that.

>spices
There’s no guarantee that those will be valuable or wanted. Especially if they don’t even exist in that world. At best you could get someone to try it out on a whim but they’re not gonna pay a lot.
Seeds, well that’s another story. I would bring some seeds.