>gf is trans, me straight male
>She asks to open, I say I'll try it
>She keeps talking to me on Grindr n talking bout fetish clubs
>I say no cos they're all MEN and fetish clubs will be full of gays
>I Suggest our first time is a threesome, maybe with someone we know like our trans friend
>On a night out I get blackout drunk, she drags me into a spare room and leaves me passed out on my back in a beanbag
>Goes and bangs the trans girl thinking I'd be cool or into it
I woke up mortified that she had done this without me, and left me blackout drunk slouched on my back when I have nursed her, kept her on her side and stayed with her when she's been drunk.
I want to forgive her, and we said we're no longer open and she's VERY regretful and admits she fucked up and acted on horny impulse with the mindset 'we both fucked her' instead of releasing it was only her engaging with this other trans girl.

Any advice from queer people in open relationships and managing these things?

>>40181768 (OP)
Talking to men on Grindr* ffs
And she suggested being open, we've been together 1.5 years and she wants to explore and have abit more fun, and see me fuck and get fucked etc.

>40181768
>chatgpt image
>a bunch of other larp
fake and gay

>>40181780
That's actually an adapted gpt image, but who the fuck cares?
Why does my post seem like a larp though, millions of people around the world are in relationships, and with the rise of open relationships and queer relationships being accepted, is it really so strange for someone to have a question about it, or have you never been in a relationship before?
I'm honestly just after normal advice and I would take it to leddit but she (gf) frequents the open relationship pages there.

>>40181768 (OP)
i think if you agreed to be open before she did this then she didnt really cheat unless youd talked through more details than that
but leaving you alone to have sex was a bad and dangerous thing to do
and yeah being open seems like a bad or at least premature decision

>>40182579
Thanks for the reply. I say cheat because I was spoken to about it first, I was completely unawares. I said several times I'm not ready for sex clubs and I'm not into dudes on Grindr, we should have a threesome with someone we know and trust first. Well, she did it on her own, no threesome there.

>>40183746
I wasn't spoken to about it first*

>>40181768 (OP)
That's gross to be honest, she cheated on you and showed her horny goes above your care and health, deal breaker for me imo

>>40181768 (OP)
you are a gay man dating another man and you let that man cuck you

>>40183762
That's the issue though, I'm not fully gay, otherwise I'd be sexually promiscuous and meet guys off Grindr for threesomes, like she wants. I've been with 11 cis women before her and a couple long term relationships, she's just banged dudes of Grindr.
>>40183754
I'm scared to let go though, we've built a real life together over a year and a half ago.

>>40181768 (OP)
this was wrong. you and your troonie gf decided to have a threesome and then she let you out of the deal and then fucked the other trannie alone. thats cheating because she broke the deal. if i were you i would cut the relationship forever but i understeand if this was a long standing relationship then at least give the relationship some space and cut her off your life for a while

>>40181768 (OP)
>>She asks to open
should've broken up with there since shes already thinking of it

>>40183960
We are adults and live together, I can't just cut her out. I don't see her for 10 hours a day because of work and I'm going to hang with a cousin this weekend, but I'm scared she might think I'm too possessive or dramatic, or that actually she doesn't want to be with me and will leave me, making me think I need to keep up with being the best bf ever.
>>40184128
All her mates do it, it's the in thing for gays n such these days. My cousin always has em since he's a fag.

>>40184643
i understeand that living together can be an issue but what she did was wrong. i couldnt forgive her but thats me. i dont think you should try to be the best boyfriend either after she cheated on you in such a fucking awful way

>>40184742
But it is true we said we wanted to try being open, does that not count for something?

>>40184742
I don't know what I'd do without her, honestly I'd be suicidal. I have it 'together' as in I have a house, good job (altho company is closing in coming months so new job time) and I keep in shape. Problem is, I have always battled severe depression and anxiety, and isolated myself from friends and don't make new ones easily, as is common in straight men.
I've done counselling and cbt, but all the socialising and fun in my life is through her. Infact, the trans girl she fucked rents a room off me, and another friend of hers. We moved to a small flat for my job and rented to her friends who needed somewhere post uni.

>>40184643
"everyone is doing it" is not the correct response to cheating

>>40181768 (OP)
Ok as someone who is also in an open relationship you need to chill. Like yes you have every right to be upset but you're upset for the wrong reasons. Be. Mad that you missed out on the threesome. If you're open it wasn't cheating. If you required pre approval of partners you should have mentioned that boundary when you decided to open things. But also you DID know she was going to fuck her. YOU passed out on them. In what universe does she not fuck the trans girl you brought home? She didn't cheat. She just didn't wake you up. Honestly why would you pass out when you were on your way to having a threesome with two hot trans girls? You just fucked up bro. Don't blame her though. Don't drink so much next time.

Like seriously imagine it from their point of view. They were gonna rock your world but you couldn't hold your liquor. Just apologize to each other and move on. This is not grounds to end a relationship or stay mad over. Ignore the incels posting here, they're just mad they aren't getting opportunities like this.

>>40181768 (OP)
>open relationship
you fell for it