QOTT: Have you ever cosplayed?
last thread:
>>40158240
>>40184180 (OP)No
I don’t do anything self expressive and when I do I feel inadequate and fake doing it
Which means no display no crossdress no nothing
>>40184180 (OP)>QOTT...I suppose, when I was a lot younger, I helped my eldest sister with fancy dress and the like for Halloween and the occasional fancy dress party? I used to be somewhat more of a "maker" of things, so she tended to come to me for help with that kind of thing. Of course, when she was taken from us, that stopped.
I never really wore fancy-dress or anything of the sort, though - nor cosplay. The whole deal of going out at Halloween was never really in my wheelhouse, and I usually had a lot of elective homework to focus on during the holidays rather than doing stuff like parties or whatnot.
im want hot anime foid body no i wont troon out i cba become a hon
ez reason to rep desu youl never be a perfect hot anime girl why even bother
>>40184434Have you tried kigging yet? It seems to be what you want
>>40184707Disgusting mef agp shit and also fake
>>40184715kigurumi is based as fuck
>>40184756need... wish i lived alone
I think the part I hate the most is the emotional instability. Have been fine for a few weeks, woke up today extremely anxious and can't stop crying. brain plz stop
>>40184756that's crazy
latest
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my nonbinary ex convinced me to buy a shinji plug suit because they were going to a con as rei and they wanted a shinji. It was awful because my shinji was just some cheap lycra shit I bought online while they actually spent a lot of time and money on their rei. and I was a total brick in that shit, can't even cosplay as a male
I don't even like EVA!
>>40184180 (OP)take your HRT, retards
>>40185218become a repper, retard
>>40185244no way, fag, I repressed semi-actively from the ages of 6 to 30 and it sucked ass
just take HRT and permaboymode, retards. No one will care about your mantits.
>>40185312don't lie, some people will care, just gotta deal with it
>>40185249im not a fag im a man and you are too, repress, you cant be a woman so why even try
>>40185392"gender" (sex) dysphoria
>>40185249WE ARE NIT THE FUCKING SAME
I REPRESSED AFTER 17-18-19 yo for 10 years I AM NOT A TRSNNY SHUT UP
>>40185399so repress the dysphoria, youre the real fag by transitioning
>>40185534but I just said that I did, and it didn't work lol it fucking sucked and I was not able to live my own life over it
why are you being such a fag?
>>40185547and now youre happy as a fag? you dont even pass, how can you leave your house like that
>>40185525IM MOT TRANS
I TOOK HRT GOR FUN
I TOOK IT DYE TO SOCIAL CONTAGION
I ONLY STSTTED CAYSE ITHERS TOLD ME TO
IM FAJETRABS IBWILL NE ET BECTRUTRANS
EVERYTIME I TRY TI BE RESL GURL TRANS WOMAN IM MET WITHVRWALITY:
Sex: Male
Brain: male
>life: makeDysphoria: not real
I’m male
>>40185563I'm not sure what you're actually asking
yes I'm much happier as a person, with my body, and my sense of self since I started taking HRT and accepted I had some kind of gender thing going on
>>40185570ok tranny
>>40185573as
>>40185570 said my brain is male i have male thoughts im not a real tranny. i was never feminine as a child im just rogd agp man and i should be ashamed of it and never transition
youre hsts arent you
>>40185590ok tranny
>youre hsts arent youno, blanchard is a hack fraud to be disregarded, but stereotypically I'm more agp/agamp and also bi
I larped somewhat successfully as a cishet boy until my 20s when it really fell apart lol
>>40185619i cant even larp as a cishet boy because im not a human i should be killed in the camps
>>40185647lol this makes you more truetrans than me
take your HRT, retard
>>40185573prove it
Unless you prove it you are just insulting me
>>40185704nah, we've done that already, tranny
>>40184180 (OP)>qottive always wanted to, i used to just believe that with a little bit of work my body would be good enough for it but it really wouldn't
>>40185654im not trutrans, im a failed male that convinced himself because he has no friends and never talks to anyone past this board
>>40185716Nope not even once have you proven it
Just made up shit
LITERALLY EVERYONE BUT YOU calls me faketrans fake foid and hates me for being a male on hrt
>>40185777see you have nothing to say except try to convince me im a tranny when im just a failed male, im destined to be lonely and kill myself its okay
>>40185799>Nope not even once have you proven ityou mean you put your fingers in your ears and run away when we have drawn-out painful extractions of basic facts and checks against common definitions exposing that you are, in fact, a fucking tranny over and over again
>>40185817ok tranny
>>40185831No I just get exhausted and feel like I’m running in circles
>>40185831IM NOT A TRANNY IM A CIS MAN stop im not like you im normal
>>40185862because you are! lmao you are leaning on circular repper logic to defend your insecurity, fucking stop it tranny
>>40185865then what are you doing in this thread? tranny
>>40185872im a cis straight man with terrible dysphoria
>>40185867I’m not a repper I’m on hrt and should have been gatekept but I found people and ways to become trans cause it’s easy to lie
I’m not a woman
Idk if I even want this
I’m stuck due to shame and sunken cost
>>40185900that means you're a repressing tranny, tranny
>>40185912ok tranny
i have a meeting in like an hour and i need to get ready instead of having a meltdown over not being a chick
wtf is wrong with me
>>40185935WHO IS DOING CIRCULAR SHIT NOW??
>>40185935im not a tranny tranny means on hrt im not im normal please stop no
>>40185975?
>>40185976nah, you're a repressing tranny, tranny
>>40185979All you know is “ ok tranny”
No actual proof
>>40185979im not im going to die as a man everyone in my life will remember me as a man and nothing else
>>40186004I've demonstrated your tranniness to you many times, tranny
>>40186007you can change that
>>40186016Literally have more proof I’m faketrans
>>40186016i can change that into dying as a disgusting tranny disowned by his parents. not better
>>40186221or you can stop being an idiot doomer given to black and white thinking
tranny
>>40186239its not black and white for everyone, just for my shitty neet life in a transphobic home, i must repress or die as a fag instantly
>>40184707Nice but not enough obviously
i dont think the waiting for technological advance cope is ever going to work out but like yeah i mean i wish i could get something stronger than cosplay + mask basically
Just tell me I’m a real trans woman who is a woman
I need to believe it in order to have a normal life but I can’t
All Evidence shows I’m fake.
If that’s true why can’t I just leave? Because it’s an obsession.
If only I was trutrans or trucis :)
I wish I had a fat jiggly butt but it's male and square.
>>40187088i mean you already proved you’re faketrans by provoking people into calling you a tranny for affirmation
>>40187515Correct!!! Thank you
Advice on ending my life? Ego death maybe? I need a restart
Something less narcissist and obsessive
When are they gonna invent the bone shrinking drugs already?
>>40188855More likely replace bones with smaller fake ones
>>40189092You need your bone marrow so that wouldn't really work.
Can we get a repper area on the /lgbt/ Minecraft server ?
>>40189193We'll call it the Misery Pit.
>>40189193theres a mc server? link
>too fembrained for men
>too malebrained for women
I am FUCKED
>>40189193reppers yearn for the cold lonely mines
I pushed things too hard this week and now my energy levels are low and I'm salty at anything and I'm especially bitter about not being a woman
I wonder if I would be happier if I achieved all of my goals even
Like make good money with a good career and get to travel and not stress so much
But I'd still be alone and stuck in this decaying meat suit and forced to see happy girls living their lives
>>40190052unfortunatelly real as fuckk
>>40190774Well you'd have ffs money at least?
>>40189193throwing gender change potions at reppers in minecraft
it hurts too bad
I want to kill myself
I’m like a repper, but for all of life instead of gender. I don’t want to be a girl, I want to be a person. I can’t be me. I can’t be human, I’m not human. I have no identity, no self. I can’t even kill myself because there is nothing to kill. I am nothing.
i have friends who transitioned at the same time as me, they had ffs and pass and are women now and i detransed and went right back to where i started
>>40192073yeah its this, its not even about being a woman or feminine, i used to want that i think? i cant even imagine what i was thinking, now all i want is to feel like im in the same category as other people, i want to feel human and like i exist, but i dont.
how does it feel to be ontologically MALE
>>40192629Could be worse :)
Anyway I’m dying slowly here
It’s coming
The end
I’m so happy
>>40192073Same
My death will be sinless
>>40192592I’m Detransing as well but I think I have a better shot because I’m not actually trans desu
I’m ghost all trans people I met so they can’t hurt me :)
>>40192899i cant ghost them because they are the only chance ill ever have to find people who emphathize for me even if i am lying to them because my dysphoria isnt real
>>40184180 (OP)my family doesn't love me anymore. I genuinely wish I didn't tell my mom Im trans. She outed me to everyone and now it's like I don't even exist anymore.
I should've kept this shit to myself.
>>40192950It's not your fault your mom's a bad person.
If the rule you followed... brought you to this
Of what use was the rule?
>>40184180 (OP)>>40192950I wish you all cared but you don't. That's the Internet for you I guess. You're all just strangers.
>>40192957no, she's a wonderful person. she didn't know outting was bad, I'm not too angry. It's just I wish the people she told didn't hate me afterwards.
Especially my dad. She doesn't even get a long with him but told him anyways. Now in his words, he sees me as a "sissified loser".
why is this thread 99% fakereppers arguing with each other?
please stop invading repper spaces
>>40192998are you calling me a fake repper? because I'm not. my mom wasn't supposed to tell anyone.
>>40184707>>40184756I need one of these so badly
>>40193013tell anyone what exactly?
i am afraid that i am an ontological loser, the cloud of being a loser seems to follow me everywhere i go, ive internalised this to the point where i feel no matter what i do i will fail, and not only fail but embarass myself. it doesnt matter what it is but being a tranny feels like the ultimate humiliation, its humiliating even for a normal perosn, so for someone who everyone can see is a loser its absurd. but i cant live like this, its like being dirty and i can never be clean
>>40193040that I'm trans.
my eyes have been dry as fuck for the past couple weeks and I haven't been able to comfortably disassociate on my computer nearly as much, it sucks
i deserve to be a girl on the basis that i deserve it
>>40193062as in you're transitioning or just as in you have GD and wish that you were the opposite sex?
>>40192907It’s quite easy if you believe your existence near them is damaging like I do.
And mine isn’t even needed because I’m kot even real with them. So anything I could receive is fake anyway. Might as well stop bothering them.
>>40193104i know for the rest of my life ill never be able to stop thinking about them, they are the bravest people in the world and i want to be like them but im just not. theres no poiint in ghosting to me, thats just running away
>>40193117Then I’m running away
I hope they get to have the good life like I know they will
>>40193077well I'm on hrt, but make sure NO ONE knows about it. and if/when I see my extended family again, I'm going to tell them I'm not trans, and say my mom misheard me or something.
As far as people I don't know, I'll lie and say I'm a straight guy.
>>40193135Then yes you were one of the posters I was calling a fakerepper, please respectfully leave this place and go back to manmodergen. Good luck with your family and your transition btw
>>40193166im not a manmoder, I swear. I'm doing everything in my power to appear masculine and I'm never going to girlmode.
This is what makes me a repper and NOT a manmoder. I'm just a guy on hrt, that's it. I'm not a girl, I'm not trans. That's it, I'm trying to Repress it.
>>40193288>I'm not a manmoder I'm just manmodingle sigh
using that flag is stolen valor btw
>>40193315I'm not a fucking manmoder retard. I'm a GUY ON HRT. A guy that will NEVER be openly trans and I will NEVER girlmode.
It's really not that hard to understand. I am a repper, end of story.
>>40193373>>40193464https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sOj07ClhEi8
>>40193673I don't care, I'm still a repper.
someone post the repper OC character, I haven't seen him in a while
>>40193873I am a repper. I fucking hate you. genuinely shut the fuck up dude.
>>40193898you literally are not though, lucky you.
I don't hate you, I just want you to stop posting in this miserable thread that's made for people with dysphoria who repress rather than transitioning (taking hrt)
why do you ever want to larp as us? we suck
a
md5: d60390d3be759e2c5b27eebe7ea560e7
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I haven't eaten in 5 days. Unfortunately it doesn't feel as bad as I thought it would so I need another form of self harm.
>>40194016god i wish i was able to do that
>>40194030Your body kind of gets used to it after a while. Usually I only eat one meal a day, I've been doing that for years. After like the first week your body just stops sending you hunger signals until it's close to your daily meal.
>>40194016existing in this body is self-harm enough by itself, I've never felt the need to make it marginally worse by adding extra discomfort on top of that.
yes I know I'm malebrained
>>40194079Self harm doesn't make it worse though it makes things slightly bearable.
>>40188855That wouldn't even fully work as your big fat male brain won't even fit inside a female skull.
>>40195090Troons would gladly lobotomize themselves to fit into a dainty femoid skull.
i want somebody to give me flowers and grab my ass.
why am i like this? that's gross
All I really want is a hug and for someone to tell me I'm worth something.
all I want is to have a big pair of anime breasts
Why are pinkpillers always hons? If a gigapassoid analyzed me and told me to troon out, I would in a heartbeat.
But nope, all pinkpillers from what I've seen are not exactly good looking and are living proof that transitioning isn't a very good idea for most.
Why is that? Do they just want to spread their misery?
>bought a grill last month to help me rep
>still havent used it
>too pussy to return it
i should rope
How are we all doing today fellow reppers?
>>40196026Honestly most of them were probably groomed so that's just what being trans is like to them
They probably believe nobody would be trans if they weren't badgered into transitioning and they view every moment with someone questioning their gender as an opportunity to break their egg
>>40196026They are lonely being hons so they want to seek validation by you joining them. Just my theory anywH
>>40196437Having an anxiety episode of course.
>>40196654Oh, how long has that been going on for?
>>40196713Oh about 12 hours, but that's cheating since it's counting sleep. More like 4 not counting that. Though, I've been having a ton of anxiety issues every other day over minor things lately, I think the stress of repping is getting to me lately. As for this one, well it's a gross story but:
>Dog is sick, gets diarrhea>Clean it up, scrub the floor with a rag, scalding hot water, and soap>Wash my hand a dozen times (not exaggerating) with scalding water and more soap>Fast forward about 3 hours or so>Find myself absentmindedly putting the nail on my right thumb in my mouth >Freak out immediately, rush to the sink and spit for like twenty minutes, brush my teeth again>Scared to death I got infected with one of those brain eating tapeworms or somethingI've basically been obsessively going over a logic loop in my head about how unlikely such an event is for various reasons since then, because it calms the anxiety a little. This'll probably be a reoccurring issue all day.
>>40196783To be far that's a very legitimate concern.
>>40196783Even 4 hours can feel really hard. Do you reckon the anxiety from small little things may well be caused by dysphoria?
>>40196783Do you have ocd?
>>40196811I mean, it's a pet dog, that kind of tapeworm isn't endemic to where I live, and that much handwashing and soap should have removed anything. It's like worrying you'll get ebola because you sat in a chair at a hospital. Sure it's technically possible, but unless you actively saw someone with ebola around it's not something that you should have a big worry about.
>>40196813Maybe not directly, but if your dysphoria is causing a lot of stress, that stress can in turn exacerbate other mental issues like anxiety. I think that's what's going on here at least.
>>40196819Never been diagnosed, but it feels like it sometimes. I used to not get this anxious but it's been bad all year.
>>40196845> Maybe not directly, but if your dysphoria is causing a lot of stress, that stress can in turn exacerbate other mental issues like anxiety. I think that's what's going on here at least.Okay. Me personally, I just fight the dysphoria as much as I can and I try to deliberately not let things get to me by just acting completely different to how I would without a filter. But I wouldn’t recommend doing this, because it is slowly killing me over time. I am literally reminded at least every 10 minutes that I will never have what every other woman can have and do.
However, I feel like a lot of the stress I get from is from the fact that I am hiding it rather than the actual dysphoria itself. I know I’m giving out advice I wouldn’t even use for myself which seems a bit off, but letting someone know irl is very important. I’m not sure if this is something you have done yet, if so then great, but if not then I do believe it would really help you and help managing your anxiety. As long as you let the right people know first those who you trust the most, I do genuinely believe it will go well.
>>40196946There's no one around me I could trust to tell, they're all very conservative.
>>40196991That isn’t to say that they will or will not support you. I’ve always considered my mum to be fairly liberal, but then I think her views lean more towards gender critical (e.g. supporting sex based spaces). Meanwhile my dad who I’d align his political views with being pro trump, it was actually from him that I learnt about why people are transgender and he explained it in a way which sounded very progressive, rather than the ‘they have been groomed’ narrative. I think the most important thing is trust.
>>40197028Anon my father has literally called me up just to talk about how he saw a tranny at work and how much he wanted to bully and harass them, or about how he thinks fags should be killed.
>>40197120No shit. I’m sorry about that.
>>40197120Do you ever challenge him?
>>40197192Nope, I don't see a point.
>>40197205I’d probably try to challenge, but don’t bring the conversation up because then that would be a bit of a giveaway, or being too knowledgeable on the topic might also be a giveaway, but saying stuff like, ‘they should just be free to live their best life’, if he says something about it’s dangerous for children, then say guns kill more children, while drag queens don’t.
>>40197280* even if you don’t transition, conversations like those do shape people’s opinions like your dads, so that hopefully society will be just a bit more accepting
>>40196026i've seen at least one cis woman who was a massive pinkpiller
>>40197305its one thing to be critical of trannies, its another to say shit like "all fags should be killed". people like that will never be convinced of anything, their motivation is emotional and deranged. its more about their personal hangups than anything else.
>>40197393It's kind of a problem in our culture where we inherently associate gayness or effeminacy with being a bad person.
How joyous are you at the fact that you're a manly man forever?
>>40197393Sorry I think that I can make things better. I don’t know why I’m here
No I don’t feel good. No I don’t feel good on the inside of my body. Hello, what do I do? What is my image? I can’t see it. It’s shattered and I am nothing.
>>40197675you ok im getting the vibe that something might be up with you
>>40197701im an empath i can feel it
>>40197733Bless you friend
>>40197644It's good to try to help people, never feel sorry for having empathy.
>>40198080You type like such a dirty
>>40198034Thank you, I needed to hear that
>>40199133I do appreciate you trying to help, for a lot of people it's really good advice. I can't make my parents accept me, considering who they are, but I've been planning to make LGBT acquaintances for a while and build a separate support network that I can lean on when I do troon.
>>40193961IM NOT LARPING. OMG YOU'RE FUCKING ANNOYING. SHUT THE FUCK UPPPPP
>>40199394Taking hrt is a repfail. You're giving into the urges.
Failing at repping is a good thing actually.
>>40199443No it isn't. Do you wanna trannify and become a gigahon?
>>40199186Obviously it depends on where you are, but yeah lgbt support groups I think we would be very helpful for just meeting people you can relate to. I’m hoping to do the same when I start uni in September as my uni has lots of support and stuff which is good.
>>40200722I had to try really hard to stop myself from having an emotional breakdown yesterday in public, I feel for you anon.
* Virtual Hugs *
i just want flowers.
good night people
I want this so bad but I can never have it. Why even live?
can't wait to install a million mods on vidya and self insert as anime women
make me a girl make me a girl make me a girl make me a girl make me a girl make me a girl make me a girl make me a girl make me a girl
>>40187403cis girls have male butts too, go do squats
if i get dubs I will troon
I want to be a mother. I want to care for a child, to nurture them until they're big and strong, I want to shower them with a fire-hose of affection. To show them what it feels like to be unconditionally loved, that no matter what they do, or what happens to them, I will always be there to support them. To cherish them. To give them the love I never had.
I will never have this.
>went to a concert
>saw multiple trannies on the way home
WHY CANT THESE FUCKS LEAVE ME ALONE IWNBAW IWNBAW IWNBAW
>>40205226Same. I always told my mother that I wanted five kids growing up.
>>40203327I'm playing Daggerfall with 250 mods atm it's good shit.
https://files.catbox.moe/igqbh5.mp4
he's just like me frfr
these days theres just a aching empty hole inside, i always feel like im about to panic but im numb at the same time. i look in the mirror and i cant believe how old and how stressed i look, im only 28. it all happened so fast.
>>40205971Can't relate. I look in the mirror wearing a dress and I want to kill myself.
>>40206452i've tried crossdressing in the past and it always makes me feel like a gross loser. i dont bother. it's like trying to be feminine makes you feel more masculine somehow
>>40208162>somehowmakes perfect sense to me; you live your life only seeing feminine things like dresses and makeup on actual women, so when you try putting them on a man, things suddenly start looking less familiar, more uncanny. a dress serves to accentuate the female body, and once you stick it on a man, it now accentuates the lack thereof, in addition to male features that don't belong
>>40208916This is exactly what it feels like. That shit doesn’t belong on me. Which hurts so much because I so so badly wish I could have it
But alas, I am not allowed to be a woman :(
>>40209297It's even worse when you *almost* look good. My body is fairly lanky and adrogynous, except my ribcage and shoulders are absolutely massive and ruin everything.
I was so close :/
>>40209418I think the cruelest form of this is bodypassing but not facepassing.
>doctor ordered me to get jacked
ooh i'm killing myself
>>40209433This is me except for my ginormous fucking shoulders that look twice the size of my hips. But even if I had good shoulders, my face wouldn’t work. At all. It’s so male-coded that I honestly don’t think ffs can even help much. I hate it so much because I’ll look at myself in the mirror and think that my body might just be okay, but then I’ll make the mistake of looking up and seeing my face and realize I never had a chance.
anyone else literally can't imagine how your own body looks like? like every time i try, i feel like i get uncanny valley close and then when i see my own body again, i realize that i was wayy off
>>40209839I used to not be able to, but I've been inspecting it a lot lately since I've been losing weight so I can tell a little better now. Still feels like a bodysuit though, and whatever is wrong with my brain tells me that I'm short and weak around other people for some reason.
>>40207251I find it funny how many gay and effeminate characters in anime are villains or die in humiliating ways, and then you have even the LGBT community itself espousing these ideas implying bad people must be submissive bottoms and submissive bottoms must be bad people. Always that implied idea of punishment for some wrongdoing.
Looking in the mirror and seeing my long moid midface, gonna kms i hate my face so much
Fapping to sissy porn again. Sigh
Being AGAMP is so cringe
I want to be a normal woman but then my gross brain wants a futa cock?
>>40211040Notice how whenever woke libtards are arguing with a right wing person they immediately try to find reasons to call them gay.
>>40211411Because you are not allowed to criticize members of a group you belong to. Just how it works in retard normalfag land.
https://unsee cc/album#1PZWJynemX7n
how over is it should i just kill myself male repper 18
>>40211625your face is fine. how tall are you tho
>inb4 less than 6 footstop being retarded and troon out, lest you become one of us forever
>>40211720im 166 cm thats like 5"6'
>>40211625nigga you pass
get on hrt NOW
>>40211411Unfortunately true. Hardly ever insulted on the basis of being a straight rapist.
>>40211779i'm starting to doubt you're actually 18. do you have klinefelter or something?
>>40211846no but i was born with 7 months so like the doctor did say my puberty would be slower
>>40211798>nigga you passi dont malefail
>>40184180 (OP)I had Imperial Insignia on the Helmet but IT Dell off
And yeah i know am autistic af
>>40211886>i dont malefailsure, but you have good potential to pass, like crazy good potential
i'm not gonna tell you to troon out instantly or you'll literally explode like the pinkpiller hons, but if that's something you truly want, you probably should look into it, as you got like a 99% pass rate if you actually try.
>>40211974my nose is big and pointed down and my brow ridge is kinda fucked, not to talk about the midface
>>40212038sorry that didnt make sense on its own im drunk but like i still would need to spend thousands on surgery and end up with an uncanny face
>>40212063come back when you're sober. you wont change your mind totally hammered
>>40185312how is that supposed to fix my (faketrans) dysphoria. Is being an ugly man with tits somehow make everyone see you as a woman?
Am I just fucked, I'm so square. It's not like I'm going to try anyway, my family would kill me.
>>40212038You fucking mid-size pretty nosed retards always think you have big noses. Fuck you. It doesn’t even curve downwards ffs.
You will never know the struggle of having a nose so big that it’s all people see. Literally a fucking minecraft villager nose and I’m not even kidding. Sybau and get on hrt
I’m STRAIGHT MAN and never will be gay but… I had an orgy with 5 guys… Am I still straight?
i'm having the biggest mood swings i've ever had
i was playing vidya a couple of hours ago, having fun and now been crying for almost an hour for no reason
>>40212361Still straight if you topped!!
daily reminder to take your pills
>>40214982>>40213672you have to forcefemme yourself anon, im sorry its something everyone has to do themselves. i can be here to support you along the way
>>40215020>you have to forcefemme yourself:(
>>40215092don't listen to her, we could forcefem each other.
t. repper
>>40215092iktf. its an unpleasant truth. for a long time i wished that there would be someone to make that choice for me but thats not life.
>>40213637never
>>40212727yea same it's crazy, this shit really ruins my day for no reason. was just sorta crying into a pillow about how alone I am all afternoon
>>40167300ch@tpt: "A desire to embody femininity, or a “beautiful version” of oneself — often catalyzed by fabric, light, motion., (Autogynephilic or Transformational Fantasies)...how to manage this?
oh boy, I can't wait to wake up and have to exist again tomorrow
(18, 181cm, 140lbs)
I feel dysphoric and discontent. im going to see a psychologist eventually probably within 6 months from now so i hope they can tell me what's wrong but it's likely gonna be just telling me to troon so we'll see haha.
>QOTT
I haven't yet but i ordered a wig and a bit of makeup shiet ill report back on how it looks when it arrives if i remember :)
are you thin or workout? how do you dress?
>>40212361wait this is important! Awsner me this; did the ballz touch?
Aight. As a "repressor", I've come to the conclusion that my so called "dysphoria" has been the inability to fit into traditional masculine roles. However that in and of itself doesn't make me trans.
The solutions is clear. I need to find a woman who's into role-reversal.
I need to find a woman who:
- is strong and muscular so she could lift me up, carry me in her arms and make me feel loved and protected
- wants to be childfree because I HATE the idea of being a father
- probably needs to be bisexual because I feel shit when trying to be traditionally "sexy" in a masculine way (ewww)
- be okay with me crossdressing every once in a while
Frankly I'd want her to refer to me as her wife.
Any tips for finding a woman lile this? My plan is to hit queer/LGBT spaces and talk to Bi women.
Having these preferences as a cis male is genuine hell though. I don't feel like my body is wrong and I don't have an innate *need* to take hormones and feminize my body so I'm pretty sure I'm not a trans woman. Though I do admit, that having a more feminine body would make it easier for my girlfriend to think of me as a woman, which would be nice in a relationship.
>>40217245your looking for a femrepressor . I used to date a detrans ftm . She was nuts (dissociated personality disorder) After a while I couldn't handle her crazy. She went back to being a dude years after the breakup .
>>40217245this will end with you as the trans wife to a trans man in about a month
>>40217245Whichever path you take, anon; I truly hope it helps. I'm glad to at least know you're willing to consider entering a romantic relationship without feeling like it'd be a betrayal of the other person's feelings. Best of luck and godspeed. :)
>>40217341Tbf I assume I'd disclose my thoughts and feelings around gender to my partner.
There's no way I'm risking being a John 30/40/50.
>>40206452Same. I feel pathetic wearing women's clothes. And think it's dumb
I can get rid of the dysphoria, but I can’t get rid of the years of suffering. Every time I’ve felt hurt because of my gender, it still brings me down. Even though I don’t feel it as much now as I used to. I’m completely disconnected from society and concepts like man and woman. I’ve lost the ability to love and care for people, and consequently this has reduced my AGP. But inside me, a voice still bothers me. A voice that tells me that my life is a lie and that I’ve run away from my true desire. I would like to silence this voice, or at least be able to disagree with it.
AGP means wanting to look like the object of your desire, taking hrt isn't natural and I shouldn't do it. Maybe it's a desire to look more pretty
I don't want to transition and be an ugly 36 year old transwoman. I want to take a magic pill that lets me be reborn as an anime girl. Does this mean I'm trans or is it just AGP porn brain combined with trauma leading me to believe someone will only love me if I'm cute.
cute
md5: 943ee46b983a0a01ef998e6c11163b37
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Being trans is caused by evil spirits. Just like alcoholism
>>40218131any tips on exorcism (ideally cheap)
>>40218138Technically, it's not demonic possession, it's demonic oppression, Which is not treatable with exorcism.
>>40218151okay so what do i do then. i live fairly close to a church could i just like keep bringing bottles of water in there to make it holy water then fill my bathtub with them and bathe in it or something
>>40218223why do you think i have the answer bro?
>>40218237i sort of just assumed you would based on the way your first message was worded, very sorry for making that mistake anon
>>40217917> I don't want to transition and be an ugly 36 year old transwomanno sane person wants to transition, everybody dysphoric person would prefer to just magically rewrite history so that they were born cis
>A voice that tells me that my life is a liewell, yeah, your entire identity is built around being a tranny in denial. I remember feeling like this, like i'm at a party and meeting people, and then I have to introduce myself and tell stuff about what I do and shit like that, and i feel like I'm lying. What's interesting is that I don't feel like this when I'm meeting people now, after trooning, even though I'm "technically" lying my ass out by never mentioning that I'm a tranny
>>40218749whoops, the second quote about "life is a lie" was meant for
>>40217917
>>40217792> AGP means wanting to look like the object of your desire>object of your desirehave you ever had sex with a woman?
I find it hot to be feminized but I am attracted to men exclusively (I can masturbate to just a man's body or cock)
always found it odd that blanchard pretends people like me don't exist
>>40218857>the definition of hsts>blanchard pretends this doesn't exist
>>40218867HSTS don't find it hot to be feminized. I have AGP but I am attracted to men
>Ywn be kidnapped and placed into the government feminization program
maybe life is just not meant for reppers, truly nobody will miss me when im gone so why do i have wait?
i could just go back to injecting hrt
why am i so scared
It just doesnt make sense to transition if you are more into women and see yourself settling down with one. Women are into men and masculinity. Even if you feel bad and have dysphoria, it's still better to remain a man. Relationships are more important than feeling content in your body
>>40221124do you need someone to do it for you pussy
>>40221197Do you perform masculinity to attract women? How does that make you feel?
>>40221228No I feel anxious when I try to talk to people so I usually don't end up talking but when I do I just be normal
Is this general the closest thing to a repressor support group?
>>40221207>do you need someone to do it for you pussyi'm a stupid incompetent retard that needs the planets to align in order to do anything
i'm too stupid to live on my own
too afraid to go to a doctor, too afraid of injecting and ordering diy
>>40221411yea same, I mostly just hope nobody notices me
>>40221549from what I've found? I've seen r/askagp but they seem weirder than here, somehow
>>40221197I don't know. I don't think I'd like to be in a relationship as a man rven though I've had girlfriends before. I think I'm going to stay single for the rest of my life.
Holy shit I fucking hate my face.
>>40184180 (OP)>QOTTNo. I always wanted to, but I didn't build up the confidence before twink death. Now my body is not suited for any character I'd want to cosplay.
I'm not HSTS because I'm straight and I'm not AGP because all the sissy fetish shit makes me feel physically ill and repulsed. And yet I yearn to have been a girl. Is autistic a secret third category in the typology or what am I?
>>40222504Blanchardism is retarded, anon.
>>40222552that doesn't help me rep anon
one must imagine sissyhypnus happy
>>40220062>ywn get experimented on by MTFUltra
jorynnnn
md5: 2b55e7d61c3e15fca049ff5c1581897e
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>iwn look like a female jojo character
why live?
>>40224449What? It's not exactly hard to be a hon.
jolyne
md5: 95ea576f585258cf744e0d23bebdf780
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>>40224624you don't get it...
Ever go out as non binary? Does it help? How do you dress?
>>40221197>Relationships are more important than feeling content in your bodyBS
I will die a khhv and that's the least of my problems. Being alone in a body I could feel comfy in sounds like heaven compared to what I have now. I have no desire for sex/relationships as a man anyways. I am more into men than women but I don't think my feelings on this would change if I preferred women.
>>40221549yeah
probably because we prefer anonymity for obvious reasons
>>40192958hair transplant, under eye fillers, forehead botox, laser hair removal, maybe chin / jaw surgery. brow shave depending on what the profile looks like, maybe lip lift since the philtrum is longish. otherwise the proportions aren't terrible, nose isn't huge, and the eyelashes are good
>>40217245date a yaoi-moder fujo
transitioning at 30 sounds gross as fuck
t. 30 years old and want to transition
>>40217245Women like that are dykes. Just embrace both masuline and feminine sides to yourself and just be yourself and someone will like you
>>40225266our Existance is cringe
>>40225266transitioning at 19 sounds gross as fuck
t. 19 years old and want to transition
>>40225300if i were to troon out at this age it might be even more cringe
thinking about my friend my age who transitioned and became a midshit years ago, thinking about how gross she would find me if i trooned
>>40225322only gets grosser with age
>>40225266all that matters is passing. no one can see into your brain and access your pre-transition memories to deem you cringe, it's all about appearances and behavior. lots of early transitioners don't pass well and don't have natural feminine mannerisms. if you're not in the 1% genetically gifted then some amount of work is necessary regardless of age
Just repress. It aint that hard
>>40225504But I don't have the 100k necessary for the work.
>>40225504>all that matters is passing. no one can see into your brain and access your pre-transition memories to deem you cringe,if i'm a nonpassing manmoder on hrt and using the excuse i don't have dysphoria i just want to not masculinize to hide the same of being a lateshit to them
>>40225567neither do i. but for me repping with some sort of plan is better than repping in the hopes of an early death