Thread 40687810

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is anyone else a bpdemon here
if so, how do u cope

>>40687815
cutting myself and masturbating

>>40687815
sorta. would t calm me down?

>>40687828
from what ive heard from bpd ftms, T either calms your bpd down or makes you even more insane and violent. its like flipping a coin

>>40687873
oof.. its kinda fucked up my life. idk if it's worth the risk but I've been considering hrt repping

forgot to add context as to why im asking: my FP just canceled plans on me after barely paying any attention to me and im tweaking hard about it.
>>40687823
okay yeah i already do this
>>40687828
like what >>40687873 said, it’s a 50/50.

>>40687882
I feel less anger overall but it does feel differently neurochemically when I do. I get how cis men punch drywall in a way I absolutely didn’t understand before. I usually just walk away and do push ups in those moments.

It would calm you down if you got pregnant.

>>40687810 (OP)
previous isnt at bump limit yet but i like this op pic more so whatever

>>40688166
prev is also hella fucking dead so i thought maybe a new one would stimulate posting

>>40688242
it tends to drop in activity for a few hours

>>40688264
this is true, however it’s been dead for like. The Entire Day while board’s moved at around the same pace as usual

if you started spreading you pussies and saying IMPREGNATE ME BOYS
I bet the posting speed would pick up a lot

college starts soon im so nervous i jsut. want to have a good life

>>40689863
wow I bet your pussy is fresh

>>40687960
I will just hug my gf really tight instead

is achieving a slightly deeper, huskier voice achievable without hrt? literally every ftm i see on hrt has that shitty alien smoker-like voice. been thinking if i just voice train to go deeper it would be better than hrt

>>40689863
good luck anon, wishing the best for you. are you going to be living on campus? try socializing in clubs, enjoy the friendships and college experience while you can

>>40690565
>without hrt
it sounds forced as fuck fyi. you can microdose t for some time and let your voice drop a little.

>>40690576
yeah i am! and okay okay i’ll try all of that stuff :)

buuuuump

>>40687810 (OP)
>been considering hrtrepping
>check prices for consults online
>only hrt "clinic" in my area for adult pts is owned by a quack who sells herbal supplements to hons
>check online
>individual consults for online hrt providers are around $150 plus lab fees, monthly membership fees, so on
>not a single online provider takes my insurance
>besides if they did i would need preauthorization for t coverage
>covered or not my family would find out that i would be on t through eob statements because i'm on their insurance (patient privacy? as an adult? lel)
>b-but don't do DIY!!! testosterone is le steroid and a scheduled DRUG!!
oddly enough there's more in person hrt clinics for children in my area than there are for adults. even planned parenthood around here has stopped making hrt appointments for some reason so the only viable options are diy or overpriced telehealth clinics that'll probably poondose their pts (the latter of which would also out me to my family that made me go though conversion therapy when i tried to come out as a child)

>>40692691
I’ve unironically never met anyone except nondysphoric cissoids who say shit like
>b-but don't do DIY!!! testosterone is le steroid and a scheduled DRUG!!
I think most people don’t care.

How to cope with period?
I actually can't do this anymore why the fuck we have to bleed every month???

>>40689863
Then be like me (19) and don't go to college just rot in your house!

>>40678900
Yes. Men want women to fail from the start.

>>40693014
usually misguided youngsters are like this if they’ve fallen for the “DONT GET ON HRT UNTIL YOURE 18” propaganda and fear mongering
>>40693219
noooo im sick of rotting… maybe if i can be worth something in life i can ignore the pooner thoughts instead of sitting alone with them.
>>40693209
alcohol is my solution

Dealing with gender dysphoria is easier if you realise that focusing on one's appearance is for shallow, materialistic, thoughtless people, and what really matters is what kind of person you are on the inside. Accepting that ideals of beauty are just that - ideals, and that you (and many other people) may not live up to them, and that's fine, will make you a happier person.

>>40693327
I meant to post it on the other /repgen/ thread, but whatever, this applies regardless of gender.

>>40693327
>>40693359
Clocked your post as amab before even reading it
It's over

>>40693209
just get off 8 times a day

>>40693384
With period?

>>40693327
im a woman of course im shallow

>>40687810 (OP)
take your HRT, retards

Threadly reminder that the following are the best ways to manage your dysphoria (the more you do at once the better!):
1) Butchmax
2) HRT-rep
3) Get a short, mtf femme gf
4) -optional- get bottom and/or top surgery

If anyone wants an emotional or physical punching bag. I'm here for you.

Uhh maybe a dumb question but if I go off t and start repping is my t dick gonna go back to normal?

>>40693696
Nope that growth is permanent

>>40693431
yes? why is that a problem?

>>40693721
T-dicks really are amazing and do not get anywhere near enough love.

I think repping has aged me prematurely, anyone else?
I'm only 25 but I have noticeable wrinkles around my mouth and between my eyebrows. My face looks really gaunt too even though I used to have fuller cheeks.

using this thread as a public diary feel free to overlook this brick shithouse of a post. ok i was going through my usual routine of rustlng through my memories and trying to figure out what went wrong with me and i think it boils down to me being an insane control freak. when i overheard my mother talking on the phone about how the way that i am makes her depressed i got extremely angry with her and broke some of her stuff, and at the time i justified it with saying that she made me feel like a burden but now im realizing that i was simply angry at her for having those emotions. in my head shes not allowed to be sad because my subconscious thinks that she deserves all of this, thats why i tarded out, its about control. she told me that i perceive her as quote "a vessel for food and money" and shes right, i do not see her in any other way, my ideal world would include her fucking off and taking the shape of the mold that i constructed for her inside of my head, shes not useful for anything esle. this desire for control started in early childhood, most of the time other kids did not play with me because i was a freak but when they did (my parents artificially made us interact) i was always orchestrating other childrens "characters" and like giving them out lines for our larp and id get angry if they did not follow through with my ideas, the larps were always weird and disturbing and wildly inappropriate for a child my age, like one of them involved me larping as a kidnapper who held other kids hostage in a basement. i was 10 at the time. this is what got me diagnosed because one of the parents found this to be disturbing and called the child protective services and i was made to go to a psych.

>>40693784
As a lurking cis man, yeah I agree. Tdick is maybe my favorite thing ever when it comes to sex

>>40693828
Extreme worry, distress and sadness over prolonged periods is linked to signs of premature aging.
Repping without taking steps to attempt to manage your dysphoria (see >>40693489 ) is obviously going to cause those feelings.
Get your dysphoria under control and I think you will both feel and visibly look better. To say nothing of having more positive energy.
>>40693900
I'm an mtf with 2 femrepper exs who used T.
T-dicks really are amazing and I think should be acknowledged as such.

>>40693828
Some people just get wrinkles earlier. I've known a girl with noticeable wrinkles at 21. Go to bed at 11 pm, sleep for 8 hours, and drink enough water every day, no breaks. This won't make you look younger but will make you age slower in the future.

everything about it is so useless. I'm not male, so what? I should just stop thinking about it. completely illogical. yet it keeps coming back. very stupid.

>>40688242
That's because I started posting sorry
Everything I touch dies

>>40693881
my mom and stepdad were abusive as shit and my stepdad basically told me that exact same thing, it's not your fault that you were a troubled kid, your parents are supposed to help you with that not guilt you for expecting the basic necessities from the people who literally chose to make you exist.

>>40693489
No one wants your moid shit hole gtfo

It's been over 15 hours, still no reply but they've changed their profile picture so they're online, just don't want to text me. What is the most normal way to handle it? (they sent me 10 texts max before ghosting me and I didn't even have time to say anything wrong)
t. bpdemon

>>40694219
theyve clearly seen your messages, best to give them space for a day or two. thats ideal and i know thats a long time as a bpdemon, so try to fill the rest of today up with drugs or vidya, then sleep, then message her again
t. fellow bpdemon

>>40694066
>your parents are supposed to help you with that
unfortunately theyre extremely retarded. like i couldnt be farther from them morally and emotionally and intellectually. even when theyre nice to me i always feel an urge to insult them and bring them down because theres legitimely nothing to them as individuals, like ive tried to get to know them better but i cant because theres nothing. they dont have any hobbies or interests or any thoughts that are worth to be said outloud. i cant stand people like them, just braindead vessels walking around, watching instagram reels on their phones, never doing any kind of introspection or putting effort into anything non work related. it makes me sick.

>>40694233
From my experience, if they act like this on the first day, they're not interested and it's not going to change later. But sure I can spend a couple more days in waiting mode just to make sure, thank you for replying

>>40694248
i feel the same abt my parents, i gave them a lot of chances to not be narcissists, selfish assholes, or shallow. they took none of them and purposely created problems and blamed me for them. you are justified in not liking them and only tolerating being around them when you have to, they brought it upon themselves. a ton of ppl are like that unfortunately.

>>40693881
>diagnosed
What with?

>>40694377
i wouldnt call my parents narcissists i feel like that would be giving them too much credit. theyre just not smart. they wanted a normal child but had no idea how to raise one
>>40694407
conduct disorder

>>40693828
i think the opposite. staying inside has reduced sun damage and i'm a neet no so work related stress

>>40694463
>conduct disorder
I’m going to ask some other invasive questions, no worries if you don’t want to answer them.
Do you feel your parents treated you differently after your diagnosis?
Did you view yourself differently after your diagnosis? (If you were aware of it)

>>40694532
>Do you feel your parents treated you differently after your diagnosis?
they did i was treated more harshly than other children because my every action was pathologized. whnever i did something bad accidentally (like breaking something or spilling something) i was accused of doing it on purpose. i was accused of lying or being deceitful even when i was telling the truth. i think that being treated this way made it worse because i started breaking stuff just to make them mad and learnt to be more careful and articulate with lying/began twisting the truth more often to make it more "belivable". it was kind of a self fulfilling prophecy
>Did you view yourself differently after your diagnosis?
i dont know how i viewed myself i feel like i wasnt a fully conscious being until my late teenagehood, i just kind of did things on autopilot.

>>40694219
If people want to talk to you they respond. The answer is always do nothing.

>>40694219
theyre ghosting u nona
just move on
t. bpdemon 3

Sometimes it’s tempting to post myself to a /passgen/ and LARP as MtF to see what people think of me….

>>40695066
They would probably just notice

>>40693209
Some forms of birth control will stop your period. I haven't taken it though so I don't know about other side effects. I do know that some types of bc are contain estrogen so probably not a good option if you already have gender dysphoria

>>40687828
>would t calm me down?
lol no

There's been experiments on this. Testosterone treatment only encourages more of every behaviour you already have. The perceived phenomenon of men being more logical is because we have far more social inventive since childhood for being so. Hormones are proven to not be the difference

>>40694636
>pathologized
I’m really sorry this happened. I think 10 is fine for the type of scenarios you described, especially if you grew up when everyone was telling you that you’d get kidnapped or whatever. Play is how kids understand things.
I also had friends who’d get aggressive if scenarios didn’t go their way, so I hope you don’t feel like you were a complete freak for that.
Conduct disorder is weird because it can range from like a kid who is kind of mean sometimes, and maybe hit a kid or broke something a few times; to a kid who kills a bunch of animals and sets fires and shit on purpose. Obviously, I don’t know where you fit into that.
I don’t think you should’ve broken your mom’s things, you should probably continue to work on not doing that. I also think it was fucked for your mom to have said what she did, somewhere where you could potentially hear it.

>>40696019
>I hope you don’t feel like you were a complete freak for that.
i am a freak but thats fine by me
>Conduct disorder is weird because it can range from like a kid who is kind of mean sometimes, and maybe hit a kid or broke something a few times; to a kid who kills a bunch of animals and sets fires and shit on purpose
i was both of those like i did a lot of concerning things as a child but being prodded by psychiatrists just made it worse, like if you continuously tell your child that theyre fucked up theyre gonna become fucked up. my first psychiatrist was also really weird like she said to my parents that they should let me hurt animals if it makes me happy but also told them that me crying and being sad was a manipulation attempt. i have no idea what the fuck was her deal

Considering going on T until I get consistently gendered as male in public and then going off of it. Most of the effects that I would want out of T (deeper voice, facial hair, bottom growth) are permanent anyways. Half of my hesitation to transition is the fact that I don't want to be injecting myself for the rest of my life

Valid reasons to rep that I respect:
>realized long after puberty when the damage can't be undone
>lives in conservative country
>can't afford gender transition care
>objectively bad starting point (shorter than most females, comically tiny skeleton)
Retarded reasons that I don't respect:
>"everyone is so mean to trannies I'd rather rep forever than struggle for a couple of years before I can pass and assimilate and live a normal fucking life"
Westerners have to shut the fuck up unless they're from a muslim family who married them away at 10 yo and they have 5 kids by now and their family will hunt them down if they try to escape

>born to be a st4t ftm
>forced to be a lesbian femrepper

why am i like this

>>40697832
You can be socially straight if you date an mtf repper

>>40697832
You know that you can just butchmax, hrt-rep and date a mtf as a lesbian femrepper right?
Plenty of us are into that.

>>40697857
>>40697850
Why would they date a troon if they like women though

>>40697924
they said they wanted to be st4t

ill never be a man

Looks like they did ghost me hahaha back to not talking to people for months and going insane in my room I guess

If I could get pregnant I would just pop out babies and I wouldn't be a loner anymore. I physically cannot imagine HAVING THAT OPPORTUNITY at my fingertips and not taking it. Men will totally pay for all of your shit, the rest of your life, if you just pop out babies for them.

>>40687815
I think that is like almost all women, like 90%

should i start huffing gasoline

>>40689863
speaking as a recent college grad
please pick something relevant that isn't completely bursting with applicants, like I probably wouldn't do compsci. honestly if you want a decent life and can tolerate kids or even adults with autism, look into becoming a BCBA. It is an incredibly fast growing field with demand that cannot even be met because there just isn't enough. it is also a job that can be done remotely mostly depending in you do in home.

you also will make six figs in most states.

>>40698406
well I mean you also gotta take care of the babies and that kinda sucks, like 6-7 years of constant shit cleaning, at least 18 years of making food for them, etc. it's a lot of work.

>>40698436
bpdemons should never become parents

i love huffing my own musk i smell like sweat and beef stew

>>40698436
that seems like a small price to pay for being able to participate in society + everyone is SO MUCH NICER to you when you have a child around you

another day, another realization that i am without a penis, and will die without a penis.

>>40698907
In my experience, femreppers on T have an amazing smell. Especially just after working out.

is there any way i can cause severe and permament damage to my uterus without stabbing myself or anything. i know that smoking and drinking affects it and i do both of those daily, what else can i do to kill that thing

>>40699309
travel to the nearest nuclear test site, the radiation will make you infertile

>>40699331
its not about fertility i want to cause actual damage

>>40699309
>>40699341
>damage
>not about fertility
What do you mean by damage then, biologically speaking?

>>40699555
i wana make it fail or at least cease most of its functions

>>40699597
So it is about fertility.

>>40699597
>>40699677
+ I don't think you understand what a failing organ means. Do you have a death wish? Do you want to experience cancer? Rotting from the inside?
Drinking and smoking is a sure way to nuke your brain, lungs, liver, cardiovascular system, and digestive tract though.

>tfw need to maintain a 24/7 internal larp as a guy to remain a functional member of society
you know how some people imagine they are their fav character when it's time to do chores. kinda same.

>>40699823
me too, it's cringe but i imagine myself as some stoic macho stereotype soldiering through his daily responsibilities

>>40693747
Yes it is? How can I get off when it's bloody?

>>40700297
lmao just wash your hands afterwards, or use a wet wipe if you can't get up

>>40693828
Nope, I'm 20. Everyone thinks I'm 15.
Staying at home, neeting, avoiding sun damage, not smoking and taking care of my skin for ages did the opposite. Maybe it's just genetics.

>>40694219
Tell them they should rope
T. Bpdemon 4

>>40695391
It's hilarious to me how birth control has more risk than T.

>>40697816
Those are all my reasons desu

Why do repgens exist when you could just go hang out in cisles

>>40698406
Pregnancy is a humiliation ritual. I can't go through pain of childbirth, possible complications and I don't want to take care of kid for god knows how many years. Most women aren't even financially stable or man refuse to give enough money. Sounds like hell. It's not worth it at all.

god i want to fucking die

>>40698907
>beef stew
I'm confused, why does it smell like beef stew sometimes?

>>40700319
It's so disgusting to me, too much blood.

>>40700349
>Why do repgens exist when you could just go hang out in cisles
Because majority of women in cislesgen aren't reppers. And not all femreppers are lesbians majority of us are bi/straight.
Are you seriously this much fucking retarded.

>>40700349
Will it help me find a hot butch repper bf though?

>>40700391
skill issue. (you) problem. also if you have cramps, jorking it really helps.

How can you seriously jerk off if you have period wtf

>>40700436
I used to do it all the time before t, having blood on my hands was a bonus

>>40693433
>woman
>shallow
that's right, especially those who prefer to fuck men
>>40700349
many cisles are too butchphobic to let the reppers into their bars, only bi and bi-curious women will voluntarily hang out with the reppers.

>>40698917
True, it means you have biologically fulfilled your purpose, you’ve won. People love winners!

>>40700491
where the hell do i go to look for a gf who doesn't mind that i have gender issues (and autism) then

>>40700547
>gender issue
>autism
that's anime/western cartoon/video game conventions

>>40699677
no because uterus does other shit to your organism its not about whteher im able to conceive a child or not
>>40699702
>I don't think you understand what a failing organ means
i do youre just being a condescending cunt
>Dinking and smoking is a sure way to nuke your brain, lungs, liver, cardiovascular system, and digestive tract though
this faggot thinks shes my mom kek

>>40700648
>no because uterus does other shit to your organism
Okay. What does it do?
>this faggot thinks shes my mom kek
Your mom was right about drinking.

>>40700655
>Okay. What does it do?
it pumps my body full of estrogen thats why i hate it and wish to cast harm upon it

>>40700666
Your ovaries are responsible for that. If the ovaries are removed, you will still need to take female hormones or your body will collapse on itself. So it's either E or T but never zero hormones.
As for
>youre just being a condescending cunt
it's easy to be condescending when speaking to a retard. You sound both uneducated and retarded.

>>40700666
I'm not a biologist but isn't it ovaries that produce most estrogen?

>>40700349
because i have an unquenchable, violent, carnal lust for men and cant stop thinking about licking their cute hairy tits and giving them anal fissures with my imaginary cock

>>40700699
>Your ovaries are responsible for that
im using "uterus" as a shorthand for both the womb and the ovaries dont anatomyfag over this idgaf
>your body will collapse on itself
isnt it clear from my post that i like the idea of destroying my organism
>it's easy to be condescending when speaking to a retard
you started being a bitch off the bat i dont think its that

>>40700436
put a tampon in and just do clitoral stimulation

>>40698425
ahh im doing journalism as a major
im going to one of the best schools for it (apparently), so i think i’ll have some security in it cuz ur near-guaranteed a job at graduation.
>>40700349
im not lesbian
>>40700491
exactly and im one of those women LOL

But seriously how can I cope with loneliness? I suck at meeting new people, I can't talk to people irl because I'm always in my head thinking that I look female and whoever I'm talking to is seeing me as a talking vagina and nothing more. And I suck at meeting people online because I get ignored or ghosted 99% of time and when someone finally notices me and gives me time of the day it never lasts and I feel even shittier afterwards. Is there a cheat code to be ok on your own? I feel like I'm going insane when I don't talk for days (I have roommates who I'm indifferent to but I can at least talk to them about some unimportant shit sometimes) or don't text anyone for months. I think I got so used to writing stuff into the void on the internet that I don't know how to hold a conversation anymore. It has been like this since I discovered the internet: I whine about my feelings, people ignore me or come after me, I become even more disappointed in myself and everyone else, and whine even more. I was banned from forums I was at in 2010s, I was bullied out and banned from twitter, I was banned from reddit. I sucked at being on every dating app I tried, and quit every single one of them. I should probably give up on trying to communicate with people, there's something about me that makes me inherently unlikeable. Would tulpamaxxing work? I don't like myself but if I pretend hard enough could I convince myself that the part of brain isn't actually mine so I don't feel alone anymore? I seriously at my limit, I'm so tired of being isolated I NEED SOMEONE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE

>>40701851
do not start tulpamaxxing it will make you worse. i dont know what advice to give but you are not alone in this, i lost all my friends of 5+ years recently and i've been alone since then. all i have is my girlfriend and one other person i talk to online, but it does get better.

do you have any hobbies? i always suggest to try drawing. its a good way to make friends and express yourself.

>>40701851
>banned
What for?

>>40701973
Hate speech

>>40701953
>has a partner
Stopped listening. It was rude to bring it up while trying to give advice to a khhv incel

>>40701851
how the fuck do you get bullied on twitter? just tell them to fuck off

>>40702088
You clearly have never been swarmed by kpop fans who post hundreds of videos of chinks under your every tweet

>>40702126
i haven't but i also wouldn't feel bullied by that. turn off notification and go touch grass. god damn

>>40702202
You are missing the part where I said the internet is all I have and touching grass is not an option. Congrats on being ok with being a foid ig good for you

>>40701851
mental self insertion into fictional stories, constant daydreaming, and a good pair of headphones.

>>40702292
Yeah solid advice, I guess I need to go back to daydreaming instead of scrolling

>I am not dysphoric enough to consider myself trans
>Started T anyways because I couldn't keep ignoring said dysphoria
The thing that drives me insane is the idea of having to inject every week for the rest of life. Just seems soul-sucking, a permanent negative reminder. It also seems selfish in a sense that I'm voluntarily medicalizing myself. But my dysphoria getting to an unignorable state.
I feel too wishy washy and sometimes I think I'm going to be unhappy no matter what I do. I don't even know what I want anymore, sometimes I wish I didn't have a physical body at all so I didn't have to worry about any of this.

another promotion at last. need moar money. i intend to marry a gay bottom (lavender marriage is still common enough here) and have kids through surrogacy (expensive) and also an unrequited crush on my own husband (painful but maybe worth it).

he's kicking
mom put your hands on your belly
there's a new life within you - waiting for his turn in the world

another day of arguing with moids online and telling them to kill themselves. god, i love my life.

>>40703808
someone's going to attempt a diy hysterectomy because of these posts

>>40703884
You really talk to moids? I despise them so much I wouldn't give them any attention

>>40703928
they’re good punching bags imho
i only have one that i can tolerate in my life

Update: tried daydreaming, it was boring as fuck. It was fun back then because I could daydream about someone I had a crush on, now it's boring even if I imagine the characters I'm mildly attracted to. Life isn't fun when I don't have crushes that make me physically unwell
t. bpdemon

>>40703961
Maybe, I just picture a masochistic moid with unwashed ass on the other side of the screen who gets off to you being mean to him and it turns me off immediately

>>40704016
NOOOO why did you have to put that image in my head. i feel nauseous now

>>40704134
Because making others feel bad makes me feel a little better desu

I just have had to use all my willpower not go kick my roommate's cat because the little fucker is annoying but doesn't deserve to be kicked by something 100 times larger than itself, I'm losing my shit more and more every day
Maybe moids were right and I should get pregnant and give birth so that when I lose it completely and kill myself, I can take the baby with me

The last thread was shit. The thread before that was shit. This thread is shit.

I need an older women that makes all of my life decisions for me

>>40704879
we never have qotts anymore...

Just remembered this thread exists. I wonder what's going to happen if I post the same thing here I usually do at clg.

ANAL SEX

>>40705110
>ANAL SEX
YES

what music do u guys listen to

>>40705543
Can't remember when was the last time I listened to music tbdesu

>>40705212
W-wait... really?

>>40705543
https://youtu.be/ccztRby3FAk?si=iSFqaaXc-dZFipbz
listened to car seat headrest today, made me sad.

>>40705599
If I bottom, yes. It's the only type of sex that I can imagine to be somewhat satisfying considering dysphoria and stuff

>>40705691
I'm a bottom too........
Awkward.

The only way I could see myself being happy being a woman is if the whole world was female. In a world with men in it, I want to be male

>>40705071
>older women that makes all of my life decisions for me
You called?

>>40705929
I honestly thought there would be more tops here, especially those okay with a cis lesbian who just happens to enjoy anal sex (receiving) too much. I guess I was wrong.

>>40706356
Please be close to 40.
>>40706392
The androphiles and bis are mostly bottoms and they make up the vast majority of femreppers in these threads these days.
Back when gynephiles were the majority, we had far more tops (most of them being stones). I miss those days...

>>40706392
I can't call myself a top because I don't get laid

>>40701851
anon dont listen to that shallow retarded bitch. do asbolutely start tulpamaxxing. real people will always disappoint you, fantasies wont.
>>40703997
make ocs and get obsessed with them and writting their backstories. thats what i did now theyre all i think about

>>40706392
Nah I can't even consider topping without feeling absolutely miserable because it reminds me that I don't have a dick. I'm a virgin anyway, and maybe I could theoretically switch if I had a partner and feel comfortable but there's no point thinking about this

>>40706619
Thank you anon, I was a fool who kept hoping that maybe I could find a real person who I can trust. I don't believe in perfect relationships and my standards are extremely low, yet real people can't meet them anyway. If there are no people out there who will like me and be there for me, there's really no other way

>>40706438
>The androphiles and bis are mostly bottoms and they make up the vast majority of femreppers in these threads these days.
I mean it makes perfect sense, being a gynephile and a top is as manly as it gets, you can cope by being a stone hrt butch and be relatively accepted in lgbt circles at least, but there are no viable options for androphilic bottoms who can't pass as men and are too dysphoric to larp as straight women

>>40707254
Oh, I agree that it makes perfect sense. Androphile femreppers have things especially hard and I do feel sorry for them. You can kinda understand why so many of them do end up pooning.
It is just that I do remember a time when we had more gynephiles in these threads. As the certified #1 fan of hrt butches, it just kinda bums me out that we have so few these days.

On the top/bottom thing.
Before brainworms, every time I felt attraction, I imagined myself topping that person, fucking their brains out and all that. Never liked the mere idea of submitting to someone, ever. And then I learnt that it's a typical fujo style attraction and iwnbam and no moid will ever treat a dickless creature like an equal and they don't want a top who is inexperienced and mentally ill and they will troon out eventually. It was over before it even started.

>>40706438
Sorry in my 30s

>>40707495
this is so real

>>40707203
>I was a fool who kept hoping that maybe I could find a real person who I can trust
doesnt work that way when youre a mentally ill tranny/repper. evryone is SOOOOOOOOOO supportive towards you until you do something they dont like and then they start subtly they/them-ing you and treating you like a freak. never trust other human beings it will always end badly

>>40707555
Well so am I. But in my early 30s.
I just like older partners.
>>40707614
I feel so sorry for fujos desu.

my sexuality doesnt make any sense as a top biastophilliac physically feeble androphile. i wish i was into women or at least twinks but no im the straightest person alive whos into men like picrel. my fantasies dont maky any sense how am i supposed to rape and overpower someone whos 3 times my size. what a retarded brain

>>40693489
>get a short, mtf femme gf
Literally the dream. I dream of her every night. My ideal of is kind of ugly in the face which I find deeply endearing. Crooked teeth and a lazy eye level ugly. I want the girl who thinks nobody else wants her. In return shell love my eventual patchy beard and awkward body and froggy voice. We'd look like the average nerd couple, just shorter than usual. We talk about history together. We play music and video games together. I could be the bf that makes her laugh and feel beautiful because i really believe its true. God my life is so sad. That's how I know im really male

the issue with real people is that they simply expect something from me that I cannot live up to. people expect you to not only stay alive/function but to genuinely enjoy things and form bonds and gain worthwhile experiences and in general to actually live, and I'm fighting with myself to stay capable of doing the first thing. I will do enough to not actively be a burden and to avoid conflict but I'm hardly a human being and I'm not there for anything else. everything around me feels like a dream and other people are incomprehensible at best and frightening most of the time. every day is spent consuming media that allows me to obsess over and fantasize about an idealized romance or friend group that I simply could not have in real life because I act like a scared prey animal when people come near me and spend 70% of every day zoned out or asleep. i live solely for whatever drawing I've decided to obsess over and shitty music. none of this is helped by the fact my body is currently doing whatever it can to make existing inside of it the most uncomfortable experience that it possibly could be. my brain is fucked and my body hurts.

>>40707854
I pass and while I'm ugly, I do not think I'm that ugly.
Still, having a partner that could make me feel loved and I could talk about nerdy shit with is the dream.

>>40707973
i understand you nona. especially the part about friendgroups except for me its that ive realized that i dont actually want to have any friends its more interesting for me to observe the interactions imaginary people in my head have, real friends are tiresome and annoying. i dont particularly enjoy being a person i wish i could be some kind of incromprehensible 4th dimension observer of the world

>>40708052
Thats a good attitude to have. I dont think im ugly but I'm not beautiful or handsome either. i definitely have an autistic face. what kind of nerdy shit do you like? I like bloodborne and ancient rome and classical music

forced pregnancy
breeding
plapping the woman back into you with my cock (spiritually)

>>40708122
I like weird arty stuff. It is something that is ever present in all of my likes from music, to movies and even just aesthetics. I suck badly at souls-like games. Autism bait like factorio or narrative games are more my jam these days. I have an interest in Hellenistic philosophy and religion, so I know some roman history. But I'm far from an expert.
I also really like baking and would like to get more into cooking in general.

>>40693327
Kinda, it's more like acknowledging your body is a shell and feelings are essentially meaningless because most things are does feel better once you accept it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Feelings are mostly just temporary sensations that trick you into thinking things that don't matter do. Once you realize that you appreciate them for what they are, interesting sensations, and they don't linger as much.

Being shallow is whatever, a normal thing, and not entirely bad keeps people from letting themselves go in some cases even... even aside from that appearances affect how we experience the world and are treated and can be an asset etc. and so on. Strategically even, I mean. Awareness of this is good, getting upset over it is needless.

>>40693828
People have always thought I'm younger. I've had a stressful life and shit, it's more just like a portrait of me is somewhere looking like my life for me or something. What people think when they see me and what's there are very different.

I don't really go out in the sun and shit either though, I go out just more at hours where it's not really sunny out.

>>40693881
Bet you're kinky.

>>40694219
You know I'm not saying this is the case but this morning I sent my brother a screenshot of a text I typed and never sent yesterday morning because I realized he was quiet after a while.

Seeing messages doesn't always mean shit, sometimes people forget to reply or whatever. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I do all the time and disappear for days sometimes longer sometimes unless we're romantically involved and it's like mutually established in a big way I just... don't want to deal with anyone that much, and even if we are I still am probably gonna do things like forget to respond after reading texts and days could go by before I notice.

So maybe they're like that and you'll just grow to resent them over the longterm instead of caring if they like you... if you needed a bright side ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I think both the women I dated may have been BPD, the guys are always calmer, no more women.

>>40696019
I used to love setting shit on fire as a kid, made napalm etc. even...Not them, but I was always getting into shit as a kid.

>>40696516
>hurt animals if it made me happy
Lol that's fucked.

>>40698419
Why when there's better drugs?

>>40699702
Eh you won't necessarily experience any of that and you can do everything "right" and die of cancer. Life is crazy. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

>>40700349
I'm bi and prefer men and lesbians actually hate me.

>>40700382
One day...

I promise if you let me fuck you, you'll be cured of all this trans shit

>>40701851
Banned for what?

>>40705543
The Smiths, Joy Division, Absurd, Burzum, She Past Away, Human Tetris, New Order, Alice In Chains etc. etc. etc.

>>40707555
In your 30's can be close to 40, I am ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

>>40707973
Why do you care about pleasing people?

This thread has helped remind me why I don’t just hate transbians but also hate afabs. You lot are dulls. Listening to you drag on just makes me hate being a women more.

>>40705071
>qotts
No one was fucking answering them anyway

>>40708732
>comes to the sad woman complaining thread
>annoyed to see sad women complaining
ok

>>40707811
Become a femdom and hate yourself/body but get to overpower and top men.

>>40708732
whats dull abt us tho

>>40708742
This is the femrepper thread. Why is no one talking about their male brained hobbies, getting ripped, or has some autistic rant.

>>40708762
you are waiting for impregnation, women are stupid and can't do anything else
you sit there, holes wide open, waiting for your purpose to be fulfilled

>>40707811
Transgenderism isnt real, you don't want to be a man, you don't feel like a man. You're a woman, stop obsessing over being "trans" and you'll stop getting transgender feelings. Just stop thinking about it

>>40708762
femrepper doesnt mean malebrained.

Stop reading yaoi and BL, it's turning you into a tranny

>>40708784
i didnt even mention being trans in my post are you having an episode

>>40708784
>stop obsessing over being "trans" and you'll stop getting transgender feelings
if only.

>>40708830
yeah my dick is hard and it won't get soft until my seed is buried in one of you sick sluts

>>40708762
>why is no one having autistic rants
you must be new here

>>40708830
Why else would you be posting here?

This >>40708833 is not me btw

>>40708832
God i wish it worked that way

>>40708847
because i experience dysphoria and do not think that transitioning will turn me into a man. having an abnormal sexuality is just a bonus, people frequently drop offtopic rants in here

>>40708803
Only speak for yourself not for me faggot

>>40708846
Ok there was some cartoon sperging… Can we like bring that back instead of whatever the fuck this turned into.

>>40708872
stop being retarded

>>40708881
> whatever the fuck this turned into
i like it better this way. no yaoi or retarded cartoon bullshit, just pure unadultereted mental illness

>>40708868
Yeah and your dysphoria isnt real, you only feel it because you're familiar with the concept and manifest those feelings within yourself. It's all in your head. It's not some sort of inherent, inescapable feeling.

>>40708906
you've found the cure to all mental issues. no one has ever tried to "just stop thinking about it" before. everyone itt is fixed now. we're free.

You know what, I kinda want to be impregnated and give birth. It must be so satisfying to slam the baby into the wall over and over again until its frail bones are crushed and its body turns into a bloody mush. After that, I can finally throw myself out of the window and be happy for a couple of seconds as I'm falling to my death.

>>40708906
>It's all in your head
yes because its a fucking mental ilness. i dont want to have this argument for the 900th time. i know that im not a man, i still want to be one because of psychological reasons that i dont want to repeat all over again

>>40708762
We had much more of that back at the start of the year. I think since we had more stone butches and they all have male brains.
Androphile femreppers just don't seem to have male brains the same way gynephile femreppers do.

A shame really. I liked reading about femreppers getting ripped.

>>40708924
>>40708936
If you'd never been exposed to the concept of transgenderism you probably wouldn't be trans and you wouldnt feel dysphoria.

>>40708937
no one cares this thread isnt created for your enjoyement

>>40708966
your holes exist for my enjoyment

>>40708965
>you probably wouldn't be trans
im arleady not trans
>you wouldnt feel dysphoria
i would. and even if i wouldnt who cares? we do not live in that imaginary reality where ive never heard of trannys, we live in the one where i have dysphoria

>>40708965
im not trans because being trans is an identity that requires you to be taking a specific action aka transitioning which im not doing. even if what youre saying is true, i cant go back in time and unlearn about dysphoria but i can tell you that just ignoring it and completely disagreeing with trans ideology hasnt made it disappear

>>40709007
transitioning is not a real action

>>40708973
My holes exist to farm money from subhumans like you who are desperate for pussy

>>40709025
you get no money until the baby is born

>>40709030
That's not how it works buddy, money forward or no pussy

>>40708937
>Where did all the hot dykes go?
Take as old as time… Dear god I hope they didn’t poon out.

I will regret what I do no matter what, the imagined version of my life will always be better than the one I am living

>>40709094
>Take as old as time
I swear being a lesbian is just endless suffering and learning to accept utter disappointment in everything.
>Dear god I hope they didn’t poon out
As someone basically only into hrt butches, I will light a candle for them. We have lost to many already.

Until next time dyels. I’ll keep checking in to see if there is any actual male brained post in the next thread. So far the only interesting person here is the guy with a breeding kink.

>>40708991
Based this world is the only one we have knower

>>40709117
I 100% agree with everything you’ve said. I’m trying to not let the lesbian loneliness get to me and stay positive, but it’s hard.

>>40709120
if mindless one digit iq bait is interesting to you youre unironically a subhuman

>>40708589
>Bet you're kinky.
i have like 6 different paraphillias

>>40708762
I haven't had a chance to autistic rant yet I only just got back a little while ago I left the threads for a while. Idk how long though because I've just been high a lot. I need a tolerance break, but I wish I had a drug to swap to at least to break up the monotony here and there.

>>40708821
The only book I have near me is a compilation book of military strategy books (Book of 5 rings, The Prince, On War etc.) I read stuff like this and religious texts etc. mostly. Though the last book I read was Valis, liked that, I put off Philip K. Dick for a while but was curious because of his visions and such. I need to read the other 2 parts of the trilogy at some point. I appreciated the blend of fiction, reality, and commentary on religion and so on.

Pretty sure what I read didn't do anything.

>>40709104
Instead of regret try shooting for apathy or strength in suffering, regret is useless.

>>40709165
Share.

>>40709165
I think all of us should list what we are into.
Could make for some fun conversation and friend making.

>>40709236
Better, post 10 things youtube recs you:
https://youtu.be/GHHuvUevaq8?si=C0qrKyAlG9HQwG2k
https://youtu.be/wanJjyzM7RI?si=kfgKMrmnj9lwY540
https://youtu.be/AFLb-bfvqXU?si=ScmL5sCZP9tQ2kaw
https://youtu.be/Pd4KxuavBuM?si=h-gY_TTo5YpVmxWD
https://youtu.be/_fxCKCcBVQs?si=BNlPxKmIldxCCL8d
https://youtu.be/7IzXPi4ogQI?si=OLlj_KVGxZL3VCWa
https://youtu.be/awT0VsELDvk?si=54QCUQl3_NP4oJ93
https://youtu.be/oOsjdlWRqIA?si=H2Zg5vvVwhveh1dF
https://youtu.be/iaeBnYLNXgQ?si=4bX41sNMV9QbKIyT
https://youtu.be/AMnSDQzYemI?si=T521JaZU17IPZE4b

I'll play along too though, mostly BDSM, I'm a masochist but sometimes mixing it up is nice. Messing around in public too, mixing drugs and sex etc.

>>40709225
>Share
im an extreme sadist thats all im gonna say. you gotta deduce the rest based on my posts

my cock cures dykes

>>40709717
I'm not that observant of a person.

>>40709704
>Better, post 10 things youtube recs you
My youtube recs have been borked for the last month or so. Basically just a collection of news reports, music and clickbait. Nothing I would want to bore people with.
>I'll play along too though
Mixing drugs and sex is something I'm into also, but it is not something I have actually done much.
I think technically I could be called a masochist. But pain itself does nothing for me. What I really like is being able is being able to make my partner feel good and powerful, with a sadist partner that just happens to involve pain being inflicted on me. I guess that my dpd has just kinda bled into my sexuality at this point and I have some weird submission/service thing going on.
For more minor kinks, I really like eating ass, smell/musk, exotic dildos, fake cum and I'm also kinda into pee.

>>40709736
Not going to watch them, just want to see what it's showing you. It doesn't necessarily show what you actually watch, I know that, it's rec'd me a horse insemination video before.

99.9% of the sex I've had I've been really high for. Pain can feel good for me, I've dropped something on my foot before and felt aroused instead of hurt. It amplifies pleasure during sex too

i need another drink or i will kill myself

>>40709751
>just want to see what it's showing you
nice data collection faggot

killing myself on this date (lie)

pregnancy is the way out of your problems

god just had to put a mind of a genius into a brain of a retard. i need stimulants

>>40705667
ive been listening to csh a lot lately too. my favourite song of theirs is kimochi warui

Femreppers! I wish I were a woman! Living as a male is extremely pointless. Why didn't I get lucky enough to be female like you

You can tell this board is going downhill cause instead of guys just trying to fuck femreppers now it's like debatebros in every thread but also with the guys still trying to fuck ftms and femreppers are still here

>>40693014
You have a point. Seems like it's the same thing with prescription skincare medications. Normies preach going to a derm and it costs hundreds of bucks but people can DIY for a fraction of the cost. I guess gender medicine is cash cow around here. What a surprise.
>>40695391
Any combination birth control pill should stop your period as long as you take it continuously (ie without the placebo/period pills). The "period" that people experience on the combination pill isn't caused by ovulation but rather a withdrawal bleed because no hormones are present in the placebo pills. My understanding is that the creators of the birth control pill wanted to include that because it would make women feel more feminine or something stupid like that.
I have heard of people stopping their periods successfully with the depo shot (just progesterone) however that is not as popular nowadays.
>>40693489
Butchmaxxing and binding definitely helps me with dysphoria however I haven't tried the other options. I'm skeptical about whether or not hrt repping would work. I would really like to get top surgery before going on any sort of hrt. Bottom surgery I am not interested in however I have had a hyster so I guess that counts as a form of bottom surgery.
>>40697816
>realized long after puberty when the damage can't be undone
>can't afford gender transition care
>objectively bad starting point (shorter than most females, comically tiny skeleton)
Sadly all of these apply in my case. Not from a Muslim family but I have tried coming out only to be subject to conversion therapy as a child and my family threatened to kill me over it. So attempting to come out again as an adult would likely put me in a dangerous situation.
>>40699309
New Hampshire recently made sterilization a right. So patients can request to be sterilized and they cannot be refused on the basis of children, age, etc. You might be able to get an elective hyster by traveling there.

>autism
>adhd
>left handed
>a bunch of random physical anomalies, all minor though
>dysphoria as the proverbial cherry on top
destined to be a special snowflake

this is so tiresome. straight women are the most annoying creatures on the planet. how am i supposed to be around them all the time. i need some therapy in the form of a cs2 lobby because a cs2 lobby makes sense to me. if i hear one more conversation about makeup or husbands or clothes, i'm going to fucking flip.

>>40713101
never mind. one of them has just complimented me and i love straight women now.

would you date a gay moidrepper who has no interest in you sexually?
the purpose being to larp as a normal hetero couple for appearances sake

>>40713519
yes, as long as we're compatible as friends. could be kino.

>>40693209
Its pretty gross, but I just bleed out bro. Don't even look at it. Just throw on some black boxers, sweats, cross my heart and hope to die bro. It's what you do with all this bullcrap. Shower with the lights off. Masturbate with everything on. Makes it easier to deal with by simply not dealing with it.
Oh and advil sometimes if that's the problem.
>>40693327
Its more what my appearance does than what it is. Or rather, its the functions that disturb me.

>>40703912
>diy hysterectomy
Is this possible without retardedly bleeding out to death? Has it been done? Any documentation like the diy orchi video? I've asked before and gotten a bunch of bullshit answers but its gotta be a thing

>>40715160
>Is this possible without retardedly bleeding out to death?
No.

>>40713519
Sure.

>>40715246
Okay. Then is there a hysterectomy alternative that has a 100% success rate? I understand the standard hysto has something like 99% or something close, but yes, that 1% bothers me that much.

>>40715160
>Is this possible without retardedly bleeding out to death?
No.
It is not an overly complicated procedure, but it is not something you can do yourself. Even an orchi is not something that can be done safely without another person and that is an massively less complex surgery.
Just get it done professionally.

>>40715292
The 1% are freak accidents and anomalies. You have nothing to worry about.

I'm so tired of being a woman when I feel nothing like it but I can't larp as a deformed looking man like 99% of ftms so I'm just miserable all the time.

solutions?????

>>40715859
See: >>40693489
Unless you are cursed with being an androphile, you have no excuse to not start improving your life today.

>>40713667
>>40715274
wow i was expecting that idea to get shot down hard. i wonder where i could find a femrepper beard irl

i fucking hate evryone

>>40716384
I want to help everyone and make them happy :3

>>40716388
they dont deserve that, humanity is a shitstain on the face of the earth

>>40716402
There are some bad people for sure.
But that is why I think life is about cultivating a group of good people in your life that you can help and do your best to ensure their happiness.

Making others happy is its own reward! :3

>>40712204
literally are you me, i have all of these

>>40716465
its not about them being bad, in fact i like it when people are bad because it makes them interesting, but most of the humanity isnt bad, or good, or anything really. most of the humanity are just meat, lounging around, wasting space, not evil but not good either, not conscious enough to be anything remarkable but not mindless enough to not be annoying. theyre not radical about anything, they dont have any outlining thoughts, theyre what i like to call half measure people, most of our society are half measure people, they call themselves misanthropes but they never truly hate humans, they call themselves animal lovers but they never become vegan or participate in animal rights type movements, they may call themselves leftists or conservatives or libertarians but theyre never commited to any of that ideas, its just labels, meaningless, retarded labels, for meaningless retarded half measure people.

>>40716743
u can blame billionaires desu because the education system sucks because they lobby against it being good and also trump literally destroying the doe, it's not a person to person issue it's an intentional system to produce consumers who are controlled by the "comfortable" lives they get scrolling tik tok and buying overpriced mass manufactured plastic shit, i agree it's a frustrating reality but there are much stronger forces that control all of the power engineering things to be this way so it's not rlly something u can blame the normies for.

>>40716777
>it's not rlly something u can blame the normies for
no it is something that im gonna blame them for because why did that education based programming to be an unremarkable slave did not work on me? this is a skill issue, its impossible for me not to disrespect brainless unthinking cattle

>>40716850
some people are lucky enough to be above it, but you realldy do have to be very lucky, you have to have a high natural iq, you have to be open minded, you have to have a lot of self control, and you have to have been raised in a way that didn't disable you mentally, a lot of ppls parents just make them retarted and dependent on comforts and dont encourage them to question about social norms and stuff. if you're vegan you shouldn't blame the cows that a species that is naturally much smarter than them put them in cages and harvests their milk and meat, some cows are smart enough to run out, that's us, but we can't blame the other cows for their circumstances.

>>40716895
>if you're vegan
im not vegan, i dont care for animals, ive mentioned veganism in my og post as an example of typical half measure person thought process. they claim to be one thing but they never get radical or interesting with it, they never fully commit, theyre afraid of being seen as "crazy" or overly hostile for their beliefs, because youre not allowed to be crazy or hostile, you have to be easy to understand and you HAVE TO verbally jerk off other half measure retards like you and tell them that theyre valid and you respect their opinion no matter how unfounded and intellectually lacking it is
>you shouldn't blame the cows that a species that is naturally much smarter than them put them in cages and harvests their milk and meat, some cows are smart enough to run out, that's us, but we can't blame the other cows for their circumstances
i get what you mean, unfortunately it is hard for me to suppress my intrinsic "survival of the fittest" mindset and kneejerk disgust that i feel when i encounter another waste of air who speaks via recycled takes from youtube videos and whos most "profound" thoughts are something that ive conceived of when i was stil in kindergarten

>>40712204
Same on lefthanded and people have asked me my whole life if I'm autistic and ADHD I just don't want to get a diagnosis because I din't like phone calls or making appointments or talking to people I don't know about personal things while they look at me, it's weird. I know I'm abnormal everyone else does too. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ No need to deal with someone else saying it with different words. I could get meth easier than adderall too probably of I wanted stims, but they'd only be good for shit like driving they aren't fun. I don't need to drive because I've arranged my life so I don't have to go to stores and things and when I go out it's only places there's no one anyway unless someone drags me and then they take care of that.

I have hypermobile joints and shit too I guess that counts as a physical thing.

>>40715414
1% is a high number, people forget that.

>>40716384
I hate 99.9% of everyone, some people are ok. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

>>40717072
don't* if* + whatever else I might've missed, I'm high.

>>40717048
i understand, i used to get rlly upset abt it too, well i still do just a little bit less. i just try to be objective and responsible abt it but it definitely gets on my nerves too.

I don't get why you guys rep.
"Oh but I'd look like a deformed male, I'd never look like a cis man."
Okay but isn't that better than looking like a woman?

>>40717153
okay but im gynephilic and find myself hot

>>40717153
this question gets asked every thread cant you just lurk the previous one to see our answers

>>40717433
Alright, my bad, I didn't realize people asked it every thread

Does misandry exist?

I had sex and actually feel better now

>>40717153
Looking like a woman is preferable to looking like a sideshow, I'm bi and prefer men and my life is easier because people think I'm cute. I'm high IQ but may as well be retarded, so I'm better off playing this hand than that one at the end of the day.

Also it occurred to me if I had been born make I'd probably be marginally more comfortable but have some brain worms in the opposite direction because I'm mostly uncomfortable with gender as a whole to some degree.

Also dysphoria mainly affects feelings and those are usually stupid and meaningless so changing my entire life trajectory over them seems like a bad idea.

>>40717469
Yes, but it's mostly women who can't express their opinions in constructive ways who spew it so I think the rest of the population is largely unaffected.

my taek is that misandry exists but its only able to cause real harm when applied to a minority. like with black and brown men being assumed to be agressive and hypermasculine in the worst way possible or like when a man is a faggot so people think that he must molest little boys bc not only is he a man but hes also a minority and its like him being a minority makes people overlook the good qualities that are stereotypically attached to the masculine, only the vile remains. do you get it

>>40717153
i dont just repress for one reason, its a combination of reasons. some more logical or important than others, that make me decide not pooning out is the better option. its annoying to answer this question every thread because its not really that clear cut to answer.

i think having a domineering but loving girlfriend would cure me of my dysphoria, but it's a completely pointless endeavour because even when i picture myself in that scenario, i can only see myself as a male. besides that, paradoxically, you could probably only have a relationship like that as a straight male since domineering lesbians are nothing but mere fantasy.

yall should thank god everyday that he didnt make me a moid

>>40716313
>wow
because our goals align. it would be nice to have a "boyfriend" for appearances sake, get to avoid sex, and hang out with someone who gets it, all at the same time. win-win.
>irl
i have no idea anon. it's not like reppers use dating apps much. you could post location.

>>40718677
What difference would this make to someone who doesn't know you irl and never will?

>>40720278
you wouldnt get it.

the girl i've been talking to just told me "btw i wouldn't be interested in you anymore if you become a pooner."
i'm actually gonna fucking do it.

>>40687823
this. i just came on here immediately after cutting myself, it's still bleeding lol

>>40718677
i may be a woman but at least i'm not circumcised

>>40720700
why are you telling me this

>>40720735
my bad, i misread as "y'all should thank god he didn't make YOU a moid." i've been thinking about how my parents would've had me circumcised me as cope to make me glad i'm afab. i'll thank god he didn't make you one either.

>>40720786
imo its better to have a circumcised dick than no dick at all. female genitals are so cucked

>>40720967
>female genitals are so cucked
Nta. I agree. It makes one perfectly expendable, and the moment a woman has a kid, her life is fucking over. I hate the whole reproduction cycle, it feels evil.

>>40721351
i hate my whole body being wired around repeoduction. i have an interesting mind with all of these complex thoughts and so much to say but its imprisone din a sex doll. an incubator that was made to be raped. how am i supposed not to hate being a woman

To all repressors here:

I could have done this ten years ago. I was already crossdressing, I was public, I was surrounded by trans people who accepted me, I recognised I had dysphoria. I even passed, at least as much as everyone around me did. But I couldn't do it. No one was on hrt, I barely understood what it did, social transition was what I assumed it was When covid hit, I should've seen it as a chance, but I didn't. I was in a different place, and I still didn't understand what I was missing.

That dysphoria never went away, but it's stepped up now. I slept away all that time, thinking there'd be another moment. Then I realised it's been a decade, and that moment isn't coming. Then I properly researched into hrt, and saw that age was a factor. I'm 29 now, and I don't pass to even that level anymore. It's like a phantom in my memory. But I'm starting it now, before I lose another second.

And once you start, it's so much EASIER. It's not "easy" by any means, but easier than the mountain in your brain. That thing telling you it's impossible. It's a fucking lie, hrt will help you with time. Finding community will come with time. You can either make time work for you, or it can let it pass you by.

It's not about losing the physical effects, although that hurts, but about missing a whole decade you can't get back. Everything gets harder with time, and that's why I'm doing it now, before it gets even worse.

You know you're trans. You know what hrt does. You know it gets harder. You know age matters. And you know eventually, you're gonna crack.

Just fucking do it already, it's not that difficult to hide, it's not that difficult to get. You can work all that out later, just do something about it before it gets harder.

>>40687810 (OP)
i cant tell if this is some fucked up obsessive thinking or not but i think i am a rapist. im pretty sure its the obsessive thinking because i was straight up told i didnt do anything by the person i keep thinking i raped but im still convinced i did. idk how to stop constantly thinking about it ive been thinking about this on loop for months and idk anyone i can talk about this without immediately getting shunned. kill me now

>>40721921
>i was straight up told i didnt do anything
Rape is non-consensual sex. The person contend therefore no rape. You're weird. OCD?

>>40721777
>And you know eventually, you're gonna crack.
i like it, i'm not gonna crack

>>40721976
You’re not that guy yes you’re gonna crack you’re already on 4chan you probably already have and haven’t even processed it because your brain is too stuck on protecting your image of being undefeated and able to overcome all

>>40719666
>you could post location
regrettably i am from the uk

>>40721921
what happened nona

>>40722356
F
let me guess, can't move to the EU?

>>40721777
Leave me alone leave me alone leave me alone leave me alone

>>40721777
get outta my face nigga

>>40721921
rape is malebrained. round of applause for our brother here.

>>40721777
nope, i'm a woman, and women are supposed to suffer. it rrally hurts to say but it's the truth.

>>40721938
not really ocd, i just have a lot of obsessive thoughts mostly about my morality but no compulsions. i spend an absurd amount of time each day worrying if i am a moral person or not and it drives me insane
>>40722377
my memory's a bit fuzzy about this but a few months ago, i was with my (now ex) boyfriend who was a sex addict and the kind of person who would fuck everything that could and couldn't move. i was extremely horny and i couldn't read his mood, he seemed tired and unenthusiastic but was also playing with my boobs and i couldn't tell what exactly he wanted and knowing him i assumed he always wanted to fuck. i kept telling him that i was horny and wanted to fuck and i feel like i was pressuring him. i asked him if we could and he said yes but i'm not sure if he really wanted to then. afterwards he said he wasn't really planning on having sex that day, and i also started questioning what i did. i asked him if i assaulted him and he said no. desu now that i've properly typed it out i can't really tell what happened

Hey if anyone wants a hrtrepper bpdemon girlboythingfriend it's your first and last chance to hmu before I kill myself (I know there are no gynephiles here left but if I wanted a moid I would've got back on tinder or something)

>>40724975
if you kill yourself, you will get no candy

>>40725190
Stop suffering > candy

>>40725212
candy > death

>>40725220
Speak for yourself faggot

>>40725254
Are you candyphobic?

>>40722405
i'd love to leave the uk but it would be difficult to find work elsewhere

women never actually kill themselves

>>40725448
i saw a video of a woman hanging herself in front of a crying child who hugged her and screamed as she died
i saw a video of women holding hands and jumping out of a window

>>40726138
>>40726138
>>40726138

>>40726144
TH thread, don't even bother clicking the link

>>40726098
>woman hanging herself in front of a crying child who hugged her and screamed as she died
Me if I get pregnant

>>40721777
it doesnt matter, i can get on hrt but i will never be a real man. you wont get it because youre a retard

>>40724861
>i just have a lot of obsessive thoughts mostly about my morality but no compulsions
anon google pure O ocd, youre not a rapist youre just obsessing and ruminating over dumb shit

>>40726258
stop being weird towards TH. get pregnant instead

why are you retards bumping that rape babies bait thread i hate you all