Thread 40737970

Should I tell my trans gf I am gay? I've been hiding it for 25 years, but maybe she will accept me? I really love her, but I don't love her as a woman.

>>40737970 (OP)
i mean, she probably knows, deep down
but yeah you will shatter her dreams of "wow i pass so well i bagged myself a genuine 100% cis straight man hehehe i am so lucky :D"
the truth hurts sometimes tho idk

>>40738093
I'm not sure it matter if she knows. Sometimes I catch myself talking in what I perceived as a fagcent when I get really excited and I think to myself - how would someone not notice this - but damn she always seems overjoyed to see me and I am scared of hurting her.

We just don't really talk about *my* sexuality - she told me she was straight when we first met and it hasn't been a topic of discussion since.

Well you dont see her as a woman so I don't see how this isnt something you say which also means the relationship is over.

>>40738113
Obviously I tell her I see her as a woman. I'm not even sure what that MEANS. Like trannies view womanhood as a value judgment as much as a specific group.

>>40738260
It means you see her the same as a woman. Its not complicated. You already said your attraction is because of their perceived masculinity. I don't know, you do seem like a flaming faggot so maybe the tranny already knows? Anyway, saying it would end the relationship (which is built on false pretenses anyway) if the tranny has self respect. But self respect and trannies...

>>40738295
>It means you see her the same as a woman.
but woman here seems to be this like status word woman sort of is like a virtue class it's not a specific definable trait is just means you are part of the noble ones

> I don't know, you do seem like a flaming faggot so maybe the tranny already knows?
I mean if she knows but doesn't say anything, and I know but I don't say anything, isn't this how it's supposed to work? Do you actually believe hrt gets rid of every single trace of maleness in you?

>>40738309
nta but no, but id never date a guy who liked me because i used to be male or still have male traits. that would be so degrading

>>40738318
>that would be so degrading
why?
it's just who you are
everyone is a combination of masculine and feminine traits - even cis women

>>40738309
What does hrt have to do with your motivations for attraction or how you see them? Hrt doesnt have to work at all for some reddit faggot to see a man in a dress as a woman. If you don't see them as a woman you dont. Trying to be cute with justifications is pointless. Just end the relationship if you dont like them for who they are. Even if its stupid and ridiculous it's not a game. You are wasting your own time. Go get a man who is comfortable being a man you opportunistic faggot scavenger.

>>40738335
cuz you see hrt as this magical elixir that removes all traces of maleness and thus anyone noticing your male traits becomes evil because you believe hrt gets rid of them all

>>40738322
because i hate being seen as a man and it would be humiliating to be condescendingly seen as a man "but it doesn't matter" by the person who im supposed to be the most connected and vulnerable with

>>40738703
why can't being masculine be a positive trait?

>>40738717
these are severely insecure and mentally ill people that have only ever been encouraged to run away from their problems rather than confront them, anon
you arent going to get through to them, dont bother

>>40738717
because i only have that masculinity due to the worst thing that ever happened to me. how are you dating a tranny and don't understand dysphoria? the whole reason i transitioned is because my maleness made me want to die

>>40738787
>due to the worst thing that ever happened to me
you know that like before puberty boys and girls don't look identical right?

>>40738818
being born with a male body was the worst thing that ever happened to me

>>40737970 (OP)
Unless she's a hon, you would be lying to her and yourself. It's never gay to love passing trans women. You're straight, or bisexual at worst

>>40738831
this seems like catastrophic black and white thinking

>>40738840
in real life a lot of trans women fall in between "obvious hon" and "stealth passing"

>>40738853
>catastrophic black and white thinking
it's emotional honesty. nothing i've been through has hurt me more. why else would i troon out? what did your gf do it for?

no, keep it a secret

>>40738103
In that case, is it really worth mentioning, if you have a healthy relationship and you both have a mutual understanding that you love eachother. Does it really matter for you you to specify specifically? I really don’t think it does.

>>40739793
it feels weird to never mention it, knowing she would use it against me, but only because of the status of the label in her mind, not because it changes who I am

there is a brand of faggot that has no empathy, reading this thread and finding out its the same kind that'll lie to trans girls about being straight has me thoroughly whelmed.

>>40737970 (OP)
there's no way this ends well

>>40739990
Meryl Streep once said: Let things fall apart—stop exhausting yourself trying to hold them together. Not everything is meant to last forever, and forcing what is already breaking will only drain you. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is let go.

>>40739996
she's fucking based