Thread 40802090

how do you cope with everyone leaving you, having no one and, everything falling apart? how do you learn to live life when poor with no prospects

>>40802090 (OP)
you dont thats why everyone is always running around panicking unless they have rich parents
the shit you see on the internet is what people want you to see and/or very very rich and powerful people flexing while pretending theyre just like you

>>40802135
yeah i’m so angry at everyone and the world and i don’t want to be but you have to be

im genuinel yterrified about how i have no skills and am too mentally fucked to even get the most basic jobs. im screaming internally. im going to be homeless

>>40802284
same

>>40802284
this is how i am i wagie rn but am basically on the cusp of being to socially inept or fucked up mentally do the job it’s embarrassing and if i fall it’s over and even if i don’t it’s over either way

>>40802090 (OP)
i want to talk about suicidal ideation but i keep getting warning to not pls somone help idk what to do it so over lmao

nothing will ever be corrected

>>40802090 (OP)
stop spamming these threads

>>40802090 (OP)
post more nudes

>>40803288
>ywn cuddle her and tell her that everyone else has left but i never will

its over chaser sisters

>>40803359
you type like someone who has left me but we were just friends i hate myself

>>40802090 (OP)
I feel like this too but I have money and good job so I guess it's not so bad. Definitely very bitter and often very lonely though

Sorry about everything nona, hope things get easier for you soon

>>40803435
i hate mysekf

>>40803435
but also sorry you know the feeling anon do you think it’ll get better or something if so how?

>>40803277
do you need money

>>40802090 (OP)
why did you make another thread? go clean your fuckin room

>>40803481
i want my family idk i scrape by but it does put a strain on everything i want old friends back and ability to maintain them what’s in it for you if you give me money?

>>40803554
also ffs that fell though but 3 years ago so i have time back

>>40803481
and ability to take friendships/ppl i pushed away and to not have moved

>>40803647
take back what ended them*

>>40802090 (OP)
kys

i don’t wanna see tomorrow

>>40803992
Stop teasing us

>>40803992
I wanna see you naked

>>40804046
how should i do it then cant find a seller that sells full nitrogen tanks online

>>40804088
40266681 in archive im heinous

>>40804101
what?

>>40804101
I mean stop teasing us with these cute ass pics. We want you to live and be cute

>>40804119
Just post it here you lazy attention whore

>>40804156
https://youtu.be/3VivPgfY-7Q?si=5pseMRwRaQqC585u
>>40804163
they’re for accountability

>>40802090 (OP)
i don't know what you women do but i'm just slowly drinking myself to death, cheers!

>>40804336
idk i drank till black out almost everyday from tenth grade till turning 20 maybe so i dont rly drink too much bc its a problem but i should prolly start again

>>40804119
can u casual spread ur ass with one hand

>>40802090 (OP)
too much drama and craziness i would never talk to you again

idek how it ever got this bad i used to just keep to myself and now ive broken everything

>>40805094
:(

>>40802090 (OP)
go to therapy

>>40804119
i'll pay you to send me videos of you farting

>>40806148
:(

>>40806156
how much you want? you can save up for the nitrogen or whatever using the money :-)

>>40806179
make an exit bag from fart money like getting choked till i fainted during the muppets movie as a kid would be fitting for my life
>>40805857
i was doing therapy and got really bad emotional dysregulation mostly what made a friend leave me and it makes life more impossible also i’m just finally getting over the rashes it cause also they wanted me to emdr and i think they would cause more stress

>>40806179
it wasn’t actually my dad who choked me it was my brother bc after my mom died my brother went to college and he would come home sometimes during the weekends and a lot of the time he would breakdown and would cry a lot and one time was during the muppet movie and i think i said something like i don’t think it’ll ever get better and he started to choke me till i got limp i wish he jkiiled me

>>40804476
pick it up again, best way to not make it into your 40s

>>40806179
my brother and sister i don’t think are as to blame as my dad but they wouldn’t do anything when i’d call them and my dad was beating me and you could hear him like banging on the door and screaming and they got their whole life with a mom i didn’t bc they were much older they were supportive when i came out instead of treating to kill me but they still barely talk to me and are clearly very ashamed and embarrassed of me even before i came out as a tranny

>>40806445
what do you drink?

>>40806179
i really like elliot smith and alex g unreleased like bootleg music they feel very similar though one was after death releases and the other was like before his life really started idk
https://youtu.be/IvLRiTcoZ_I?si=YtwOuKxLrR4xMxcN
https://youtu.be/-4j5fetvbyw?si=RO8hmhpmzJP1oMMI

>>40806565
>>40806485
>>40806436
>>40806343
so is that a yes or a no on the fart videos? i'll pay even more for poop but we dont gotta go that far if you dont want to

>>40806509
right now some cheap 40% liquor and chasing it down with 8% beers, fucking hate being a slav i have so much alcohol tolerance it still does nothing better pick up absinthe next

>>40806730
i can still drink a lot when i do unfortunately i think from drinking so much back then idk i used to be able to shotgun steel reserves which is rly nasty to think about the only liquor i can drink anymore is vodka bc ive been so sick on everything else id just rather have vodka idk its like the least nasty after all become rly nasty also i dont drink as much bc i get anxious having to show id and interact with shop person idj

>>40806679
i was supposed to have ffs like 3 years ago now bc my insurance was going to cover it fully but on surgery bed i tested positive for covid and i had to wait 2 weeks bc hospital rules and in that time my work infamously changed how their insurance works for trans surgeries and i didn’t get it and i went into debt for a free surgery and it fucked my coverage up for the next year and i have been to scared to figure things out/hate what happened too much to do anyhing

>>40806679
when i was 8 years old and my mom was in the hospital with cancer my uncle raped me he also raped my cousin who was his kid and when my cousin spoke out about this my uncle killed himself and my whole family hates this cousin bc of this and i’ve never bothered telling them about mine bc they already hate me for being a tranny

>>40806679
one time a kid threw a big piece of wood at me for being a faggot when i was middle school and it busted my head open and my dad would answer any of my friends phone calls so my friends dad took me to the hospital and i got two staples and my dad was so mad at me for this happening he abused me when i had staples in my head from a kid who assaulted me or whatever this same kid would feel me up under the desk in high school

>>40806783
guess it helps being very clearly old, nobody ever asks me for id since am tall and hairy

>>40802090 (OP)
Jesus Christ honestly

what's your discord though I feel the same and could use a friend

disc: deepfriedandcrisp

>>40806879
woildnt*…..

i told my mom before she died i was gay multiple time and multiple times i was supposed to be a girl and she would just read bible verses with me and my brother sister would bully me for being so effeminate i would sob everytime we passed girl sections in store idk my would let me pretend to do her hair and play with me that i ran my own salon idk i hope she would have been supportive but i doubt it one time i convinced my grandma to paint my toenails and my mom said to just hide from my dad but my dad did take all my stuffed animals and made me stop playing dress up and stuff and would take vhs tapes i liked that were too girly my mom would hate me and if she is seeing this she does and should i hope it’s over soon

>>40806924
i just deleted discord idk but i screenshotted your name thing idk if i make it though whatever i will prolly redownload i really like the bible verse you posted sorry im acting like this

>>40806826
>>40806845
>>40806879
>>40806928
damn that's tough... do you still fart from your butt though

>>40806957
just make a new one with a proton email or something I'll be up all night come talk

>>40806924
if you are my friend from hs whinused to harass me for nudes after transition i really never wanna talk again

>>40807000
how much would you hypothetically pay me?

>>40802090 (OP)
>>40802090 (OP)
i struggled and still do. but i have a fuckton of supports @ this point in my life.
and saving horses for free and giving them to people for free, and being trans really opened up alot for me as far as the system starting to pay attention, im also autistic diagnosed for real, no larp. and i could NEVER get help in regard to that.
but my state loves trans things, so they hook me up, and i just use this route to get the help i need.


the state trys hard to take care of me and keep me safe.
people are different, i live the night life. and im a tranny, so.. it can get pretty intense at times. and dangerous too.

but alot of people also watch out for me and the state is on my side. so i feel like im in a better place than i was some years ago.
i have 2 case managers, my own nurse, and a social worker right now.
and i live a very wild lifestyle that is very dangerous no matter if its helping dying/injured large animals or the night life.
thats like my duality. ying/yang

idk what your situation is, but it does take years of trying to get help to get there.
all i can recommend and getting health insurance and keep chipping at the state for help if you're really fucked up.


saving the horses helped me get help, and during that, they were my love and world. and i did something unique and beautiful.
and i was helping law enforcement by doing that, cause cool, you seized a dying horse... but whos going to save it?
me.

>>40807005
im not

>>40807015
it all depends on the quality of the videos but starting would probably be 40 for a couple farts and we go from there if you're good. there's another tgirl i met here i pay up to 120$ or more for some videos i will say

>>40807022
i have diagnosed ptsd idk
how did you start saving horses? that’s really sweet lol and not an answer i was expecting in this thread

so in turn, the state knows i saved a fuckton of horses. and now i think theyre trying to save me.
ive had a fucked up summer.

im like 1/2 way homeless. and run into danger almost nightly.
some people will protect me, some people want to hurt me or worse.

>>40807041
i’m not farting for you no matter the money fart anon

>>40807069
damn shame. well hope that other stuff works out for ya then

>>40807082
ty gl

>>40807047
thats a start.
having ptsd. im sure you probably have other things going on.

if you persue getting all that documented and have people test you, the state will determined you're mentally messed up and will have to help you. and they'll give you supports.

then there is the federal level which is harder to get help with. but they'll come around.
(takes over a year+)

i'd start with health insurance, and getting the state involved if you live in a good state.

i live in a very pro trans state and they help me alot.

i dont even have to do paperwork or anything my case managers handle all that bullshit because it freaks me out and i just cant fucking do it. but they knock it out as soon as it comes in.


alot of really bad things happen to me pretty frquently.

i end up in bad situations.
including people attacking me, or me getting raped, or drugged or kidnapped or jump etc.

all sorts of weird shit happens to me.

but its a mix.. sometimes its good, sometimes its pretty fucking scary and i literally dont know if i'll survive the night.

people really dangerous.

>>40807112
i’m really sorry friend ty for all the help you typed up and i’ll look into getting state help where i am. is there anything i can do for you? i really hope you stay safe

>>40807174
yeah you can send me videos of you farting

>>40807181
damn are you really fart anon

>>40807181
i was genuinely thinking of asking fart anon if i sent them vids could the money be sent to you weird world

that's someone else, anon.
i dont ask anyone here about perverted things.
i just try to give some advice from my own life experience.
i'll never ask any of you about weird things.
cause i live it and i get it.

>>40807221
oh ig it’s fart anon larping as you

>>40807221
please stay safe

>>40807216
>>40807192
yeah i was larping lol sorry sista

>>40807216
but i will send the money to that other person if you send me farts to be clear i'll do that

>>40802090 (OP)
you either get revenge on the people who abandoned you or you kill yourself
or both

install arch linux

>>40807724
>>40808200
lost my trust… but also i don’t think there’s a world where i take fart video of myself and send them to anyone

>>40808437
you can trust me i have bought from several tgirls on this website and never leaked a single video. it'd be just between you n me. i'm not sharing my fart hoard with anyone

>>40802090 (OP)
>>40803277
>>40803288
>>40803992
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

As for the rest of you pathetic fucks, just go get on testosterone and forget about your retarded woman LARPing if you want to function in society again.
Testosterone gives you confidence and mental strength.

>>40808509
:3

>>40808459
to a future employer reading this bc my face is in the thread let the record show i really didn’t want to live and i hopefully got better but i will always hate fart anon

>>40808649
:(

>>40802090 (OP)
become delusional that it will work out and then when it becomes apparent it wont guilt trip yourself out of kys because those around you would be sad.

>>40808789
ok sorry i don’t hate you but we aren’t friends but stop asking me for vids and don’t call it your fart hoard

im hiding tonight.
my whole body is sore.
my tit was even bleeding.

i went out last night and found out bad people are looking for me and want to do bad things to me.

and getitng jumped or hatecrimed is literally not even the worst of my problems.
they want to do worse to me.

so im hiding and healing.

my case manager is calling me monday.
so i figure just rest, and heal and eat healthy food and tlc myself until then.

i had a crazy month.

i got raped about a month ago.
and i guess you could qualify what happened to me last weekend as getting kidnapped and raped too but i put in in my grey box.
but im scared and hiding now.

and just want to heal.

>>40808864
can i ask where you live friend?

>>40808901
usually in massachusetts.
i jump around. sometimes im on the streets, sometimes i chill here.
i really dont have a stable living situation.
i could end up anywhere on any given day.
within like a 150 miles radius np.

>>40808929
can i ask who is looking for you? and if there is anything i can do for you?

>>40808938
probably not,
they want to keep in a trap environment and sell me and fuck me,drug meetc.
thats the ones i'm afraid of running into. cause theyre fucked up enough to take me.
theres other groups too, but they're not so bad, they might like yell shit at me or try to jump me, but that's really nothing in comparison to what the other people are up to.
i cant even chill @ my normal spot anymore cause they always drive by or come around.
and word gets around fast out here.eyes and ears everywhere.

there is also alot of people that will protect me and fight for me or give me a headsup but idk.
im hiding.

ive been ran through for like an entire week and im fucked up and need to heal.

>>40808979
do you have a discord?

also im like 50% sure i probably caught an std this week. i get tested in 1st week of september.
and im detoxing from some seriously hard substances right now.

>>40809017
:( im very very sorry

>>40809017
hey if you need some cash i got something you can do

>>40809036
lol.
i am a /biz/raeli veteran too you know.
i dont give a fuck about money anymore.
im numb to it.

>>40808811
i don’t believe anyone could actually be sad if i killed myself people really do just disappear and moments and misery everyone so overstimulated by constant interaction now it’s like the void is always overfilled anyway whether i’m there or not means nothing to no one so why should i endure the knowledge in my head

>>40808817
aight how about 150$

>>40809010
im sticking with my case managers.
i realy dont trust anyone right now.
i'm too raw and vulnerable and i can tell both sides of the law are keeping an eye on me lately.
and i just want to stay with the people helping me.

i don’t want to wake up and see the world tomorrow

>>40809112
would you be sad if i killed myself

i hate myself
https://youtu.be/jrx1rohM3Ow?si=WdsaBDDSx2mnHL__

>>40809181
well yeah of course i would. but i also dont know what kind of pain you're going through so i'm not going to tell you how to feel about things or what to do and not do

>>40802090 (OP)
Cleaning your room for one. It's hard to be happy in a messy place

i need to be backed into a corner i can’t escape from

i wish you never shared your music with me i feel aching in my lungs

>>40802090 (OP)
Tbh Ive found it to be more fuel for life than anything else. I have little other driving me other than not wanting others to get the last word on what my life was, but its also that very admission thats let me live so well with what little I have.
It does turn into a rather self destructive thing though as once I start getting successful, I start to miss the fight and start self sabatoging really fuckin hard. I think that fighting for existence is exactly what makes life worth living, after all whats the point of cruising? Why would you want to cruise instead of interact with your own life even if that interaction is fucking awful.
The worst thing you could possibly do to me is make me a suburban dad with a solid 401k, two kids, an SUV, and a house that works at a stay at home job. Id actually fuckin lose my mind from the complete lack of friction in life.
So idk, my coping mechanism has its ups and downs.

>>40809181
fart videos today kitten?