Thread 40990477

old
>>40988161

qott: Are you poor?

again
what are the key differences between reddit gays and 4chan gays

Who is the vocaroo anon and why is he so autistic and mean?

>>40990486
reddit gays think that women can be heckin valid men and we HAVE to fuck their little slimy poons or else we're literally hitler

>>40990508
he just hasnt tried the right phallo yet

>>40990486
one uses reddit and one uses 4chan

>>40990486
Reddit gays
>abs
>distinct toes
>listens to Sabrina Carpenter
>vapes

4chan gay
>monotoe
>median voter
>tonsil stones
>fat!

im effeminate

>are you poor
i thought i was, and act like i am poor but i guess i'm not

>>40990567
I'm not monotone
I don't vote
I don't have tonsil stones
I'm not fat
ur bad at this

>>40990586
same, I'm glad I am bc I like how it contrasts with and accentuates the masculinity of men I'm with both physically and behaviorally

>>40990631
I said monotoe... But you're really showing your median voter intelligence.

>tfw my body type only attracts small femboys
yuck

>>40990637
kms I wasn't wearing glasses :(

>>40990642
post sexy dad bod pls

>>40990668
I would but i keep getting called a obese spic

>>40990672
>spic
ok nvm have a nice day

>>40990694
ok :3

lol

Why do you think you need to have sex? Couldn't you just choose not to? Do you seriously lack the willpower to keep it in your pants?

>>40990725
It's such an odd mission to post where young horny people post, and then chastise them for having a sex life.

>>40990784
>>40990785
You can just masturbate, it's faster, easier, and healthier, so why do you need to have sex to relieve your sexual want?

>>40990798
When people masturbate they're thinking about sex with a partner they wish they could be having sex with. I'm against being a slut and racking up your STD score card, but 2 lovers in a committed healthy relationship should enjoy each other's bodies and their own while they can.

>>40990815
You could masturbate while thinking of just a body that you are attracted to, or even while thinking of nothing at all. If millions of people alive and dead go without sex their entire lives, many having chose so, why can't you?

>>40990668
>not denying his monotoe

>>40990815
I think about being a prince in a fantasy kingdom, whose family is overgrown by a hostile faction and most are killed, but the prince is branded a slave and forced to be the new King's concubine, chained to his throne and made to wear revealing clothing and get fucked whenever the king wanted, or to be used by the King's men etc

>>40990725
is it weird that i'm 21 and completely over the novelty of having sex? like i honestly feel like theres nothing left to achieve in my sex life aside from the really crazy stuff that i'm not interested in. i've fucked ugly people, hot people, had a threesome, slept with someone from class, work, acquaintances, family members and strangers. there's nothing left for me to do, may as well turn straight, settle down and have kids now

My sweet honey beeza
You don't like romance
You only want grooming of children
While you rub in your pants

>>40990857
what is a monotoe and do I have it
I can't deny something I don't even know

>>40990863
You could have also not done any of that. What's the point, when it's all done for the exact same brain chemicals you'd get from masturbation?

>>40990863
Squeak

>>40990874
>>40990857
fucking forgot pic

>>40990861
Very detailed fantasy. Interesting.

>>40990863
family members???
>>40990889
holy monotoe

Bruh got tricked into foot pics

>>40990889
Oof these look stinky. I bet you fart too.

slayer has never farted on vocaroo

>>40990889
page has ugly feet!?!? this cannot be

>>40990907
>>40990936
don't act like you haven't or never fantasised about it. nothing wrong with keeping it in the family

>>40990980
I hope for you that this is a larp. Being a burn out at 21 isn't a good look, and the way you become burnt out is by having sex with family members and having too many partners and diseases for sex to ever be something good again.

>>40990980
once i let my dad lick my ear but then i realised it was weird and stopped, that's the extent of it

>>40990798
because of basic biological drives why do you people insist on being retards

>>40990477 (OP)
white men owe me sex
its reparayshuns an shieeet

>>40990863
you are just more spiritually atuned than others

>>40991021
Are you so weak willed that you’re incapable of controlling your urges healthily?

Good morning!!!!
>>40990798
>>40991037
It's not about needing to cum tho it's about being close to someone, their smell, their heat, their weight etc

>>40991042
Good moaning Kate, i need u

>>40991047
good mooning

>>40991052
You gave the best answer and it made me want to smother you with my weight while i dick you down. But in a platonic way.

>>40990477 (OP)
I need a husband to love and a boyfriend to keep my satisfied <3

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_suedIaYGY
when's the last time you felt like you were in love?

>>40991056
>platonic way
how would that work
>>40991065
>boyfriend to keep my satisfied <3
Keep him as a pet

>>40991092
fwb or if you don't want to be friends, ewb

>>40991097
e as in enemies? hot

>>40991037
you’re fat and ugly please don’t talk to me anymore

>>40991092
It's so hard though because most tops are broke losers if they're hung. It's weird, the successful tops tend to be small dicked guys

but seriously why does this tranny who constantly posts Kate bush and Winona Ryder even post here? go to mtfg

i may be physically bi, but spiritually i am a bottom. can i get a gay bf?
or am i going to rot forever alone?

>>40991101
Yeah we'll diss each other with diss tracks but the homies won't know we get together afterwards for smooches

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YcRzVdt2mmw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RI9N60XxVbM

I doubt any of you even know what love is. You all sound like retarded incels.

>>40991108
same reason shiza, marina, paige, rexie post here, and whatever reason that is it escapes the rest of us

>>40991042
Those reasons sound like cope to me. Plenty of people live just fine without sex or relationships, why can’t you?

>>40991107
Unless its micro I don't really mind it small. Would rather have small dick successful top
>>40991108
maybe cuz I'm not a tranny

Men to Lovers no Speedrun Any Precinct!

>>40991108
I like her and her vibe is cozy.

>>40991131
>maybe cuz I'm not a tranny

you present yourself as a tranny in the way you look and dress

>>40991142
$100 says you're trans too lol

Hellooo ^-^
How are you?

>>40991142
no use in arguing that point with these troons they delude themselves into whatever justification they use to invade other peoples spaces

>>40991130
Because it hurts my soul
>>40991136
thank you
>>40991142
I just dress a little fem sometimes maybe and have long hair but thats it
>>40991151
hello!!

>>40991151
Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii
Marina I have lemon poppy seed muffins. Are you excited for me?

>>40991131
I want to have an ass so fat and muscular that small dicked men don't even try

>>40991184
Having a long term plan is always good I guess lul

>>40991184
you looked hottest when you were just skinny

>>40991184
You wouldn't wipe it properly and would end up with Kardashian fish food butt.

used to be a gay could appreciate a diva and not get tranny accusations baka what has happened to the world

I wonder if having a big dick makes guys more retarded than usual since they get less oxygen to their brain cuz all the blood goes to their dick instead
>>40991210
its cuz of woke

it's the lack of male images on a gay imageboard that bothers me
78 posts in and i'm the only one to post an attractive guy wtf

>>40991247
green eyes = late transtioners

>>40991248
green eyes = masc men 100% of the time
green eyed trannies don't exist

>>40991158
Hurts your soul, or are you just too stupid to control base animal instincts? People like you blow up into obese whales when the metabolism slows down.

>>40991247
posts like this just scream insecurity like do you need to be seeing hot guys all the time to remind you that you're gay... sus...

I saw this guy on Reddit who is a private chef and he is the epitome of what every man should inspire to be by the time they're 30, straight, bi, or gay. He's the perfect example of what a man should look like.

https://files.catbox.moe/ujj4d8.jpeg

>>40991255
Fat person cope I bet your "hazel" eyes.

>>40991255
I have green eyes and I approve of this message
>>40991259
>People like you blow up into obese whales when the metabolism slows down
yeah probably haha still dreading that day

>>40991273
why would i aspire to be circumcised

>>40991259
we're men, we have dicks, get over it

>>40991264
yeah I need to see naked men all day long everyday
its all I live for

>>40991284
So instead of developing your willpower by making tiny steps like choosing lifelong celibacy, you’ve resigned to your fate?

>>40991292
An important aspect of being a man is self-control.

>>40991295
omg why would I. Seems awfully depressing. What's life if I can't hug and cuddle and kiss a man plus getting railed occasionally. You make it sound like something bad

>>40991281
i've tried to ignore this news article but seeing the images and the video just pisses me off
black people are such pieces of shit and i will never be friends with any of them
unless they have been white washed from a young age and got adopted by white parents they never turn out well
they should be evicted from every country back to Africa

>>40991308
If that’s all life is for you, temporary and fleeting things, you’re living a much worse existence.

>>40991329
lol

>>40991321
zamn who is this qt anon

>>40991341
Shiza before estrogen.

>>40991344
pffft

>>40991344
Shiza looked the exact same before estrogen, just a little happier and hopeful imo. These cheeks were gettin clapped daily by her uncle.

>>40991341
some /r/twinks poster he has no other images

>>40991331
Not a “lol” matter. If all you’re living for is brain chemicals, and it’s the type of lifestyle that leads to you becoming unhealthy, why live it?

sheeza looked like THAT?? 8)
>>40991362
How is physical intimacy with someone unhealthy lol. I'd ask you what you live for but I just know it would be the most pseud incel shit ever

would a degree in entomology (bug-ology) be a waste of money?

>STOP HAVING SEX..... I DIDN'T GIVE YOU PERMISSION
Fuck off

>>40991373
>advocating for voluntary celibacy
>”u incel, lol”

>>40991374
Get fafsa and make it a waste of the government's money. Do you like bugs or something?

>>40991366
she's our rosa parks

>>40991374
So you want to be a bugchaser?

>>40991386
What was it? I didn't click

>>40991374
yes, at this point in your like as a 30yo you should know your strengths, weaknesses, and have a inner knowledge of what you excel at...

>>40991385
yeha bugs are really cool i love all bugs except mosquitoes and roaches.

>>40991393
>>40991281

>>40991393
>>>/pol/515267882
black crime that goes unpunished

>>40991397
Based. I love killing mosquitoes and roaches. I really loved ladybugs as a kid.

Did you say potato bug or roly-poly as a kid growing up in tx?

>>40991407
we said rolypoly. never heard of potato bug, but i did hear of pillbug and pillbug sounds so adorable i wish we said that instead.

>>40991377
Stop having sex, because it doesn’t benefit you at all beyond the brain chemicals that you can get far easier by just masturbating. In fact, having sex is detrimental in the long term.

>>40991420
Basically she gets stabbed in the neck and bleed out while other blacks walk off the train. One latino man and white woman tries to help her.

>>40991427
might have been blatino, or basian but definitely wasn't fully black, he was dressed too nice to be black

I Though you were the One. HAHA.... The One who got Awauy.

less text more hotties

>>40991454
4chan has porn boards you should probably go there instead of the sfw blue board you fucking retard.

>>40991464
does that look like porn faggot? maybe to a sexless mind like yours who can't even manage his life properly

Naked mens make me Scared dude to my traumas and neurotics.

>>40991474
A sexless mind is a healthier mind than the mind of a gay man whose had more partners than fingers and toes.

when does a woman cease to be human

>>40991474
it's porn to cumbrained faggots like you, find some self restraint you godless fucking heathen you are posting in a general for gay men not faggots frothing at the mouth for penis.

my life would be perfect if i had cat ears

>>40991481
>>40991483
you're on a gay general for gay men
why can't you trannies find something better to do with your time instead of trying to interact with us males all the time? you should be glad you're even getting a response

>>40991464
this is the /lgbt/ board not the asexual board, don't get your gonads in a twist ma'am

>>40991492
You can be a gay man and die never having had sex, and frankly, you’d be better for it.

>>40991492
i am a gay man, i just see more to life than sex.
>>40991497
go to mtfg or something.

>>40991492
idk why you think gaygen means the entire topic of the thread is obligated to be
>ug post sexy cock hunk i jack off cum to this pic cock penis
youd fare better on hm with the boomers

>>40991497
Asexy boys like mwah run Gaygi.

>>40991509
hey! we also talk about hating niggers and kikes

>>40991454
you first cos that ape aint it

There's more to life than sex, but sex is good too

>>40991507
only in a few photos do you even pass as a guy
i don't buy that you were born a male and have refused for 8 years now to show any evidence of being a guy (your balls, a cock, or even a nipple)

>>40991520
Drop a like, queen
https://x.com/CaudilloXIV/status/1965483007609110939

>>40991158
Omg hiiii

>>40991160
Yes!! I had those once before in cannabis edible form and they were very good!

>>40991540
I am too poor to afford Nipples please Be exusing me.

>>40991509
i just saw a lack of male images in the thread and the constant posting off deadbeat female actresses and made a post and now you guys are all getting your panties in a bunch because I want to see more MALE CONTENT
the entire topic of gaygen shouldn't circle about female interests, female-derived music, and other things only females care about

>>40991530
retweeted

>>40991540
she's lifting her breasts up with her shirt

>>40991529
lol what the photo you posted with the title "without faceapp" is clearly a guy, so what is even the issue. look at that massive head and forehead and chin? the original argument is about salivating over porn in a sfw board for gay men which is supposed to be a place for fags to mingle with each other without that nasty naked-geriatric dog-mask pride-parade bullshit haunting our conversations.

>>40991525
It’s indistinguishable from masturbation, poses a risk to your health, and leads to emotional and psychological harm. You would do well to choose celibacy.

need this

>>40991541
I would have covered her in kisses, but unfortunately Juan and DeMarcus got there before me, and now she hates sex 'for some reason' lmao
>>40991546
ya it's a standard tranny move
>>40991551
I'm not really having sex. I'm a sad guy irl. This is just fantasy talking.

>>40991556
No, you don’t.

>>40991542
the internet has been around for like 30 years old timer you can just search hot cock if you wanna see it so bad

>>40991542
oh no my general thread didn't have a naked man in it :((((
abloobloo i can NEVER have a conversation without MAN TITS and VISIBLE PENIS BULGES accompanying a post about RACIAL SLURS.

>>40991557
You’d be happier if you chose to be a lifelong celibate.

>>40991547
funny how not even one AI detector sees you as a male, faceapp doesn't see you as a male, and yet you want to tell me that you look like a guy... wtf? you've been trying to pull wool over everyone's eyes for years.. you are a woman just accept it

theres like 20 interest boards where you can talk about whatever the fuck you want and you will most likely talk to another faggot in them

>>40991574
king

>>40991579
so why don't you go to the other 50 threads in lgbt about tranniesand post in them.

>don't post male imagery on a gay MALE general

what in the clown?

>>40991598
cottage cheese.

>>40991598
its a female butt, i've seen skinny girls with butts like that

>>40991602
I bet that's the texture of your poopies based on that image.

>>40991599
me personally i got no issue with it it's the bitching that not everyone else is that's annoying

>>40991585
cause im interested in men, why don't you go to r9gay its full of sex-aversed tenderqueers

>>40991598
you have a butt like selena

>>40991602
You have beautiful skin Tex. Men don't care about a little cellulite

>>40991610
trannies like men too like half the catalog is performative tranny threads about men. r9gay is full of racist fatoids like apostle.

my feet are sweaty as hell and im just sitting around

>>40991619
they like men performatively, you wouldn't get it, the point is i have more topics in common with the usual posters here than you do

>>40990477 (OP)
what's the point if it doesn't cover medicine

Gay men who have sex aren’t happy or healthy individuals as they age. Choose celibacy, if not for today, for tomorrow.

im gay!

trannies arguing with other trannies about what gaygen should be WTF

>>40991631
the only thing you have in common with people here is posting polbait for (you)s. you are not a gay man.

>>40991643
Right? They should both be taking turns swirling their tongues up and down my cock shaft instead. Tex and shiza shemale gang bang.

>>40991649
Shiza poops Tex SHITS There's just no contest

>>40991651
Er um that's not sexy anon. We were talking about shemale tranny sexy sex

Shiza and tex tongue kissing ooh lala

>>40991647
total cope, regardless, softcore pornography will keep on being posted, cry about it

>>40991655
Okay well it's how you tell them apart...

Chicks with sticks ;o

I feel like tex has porn folders with tons of hairy guys in it...

well?

Can you really argue with this?

>>40991665
>softcore pornography will keep on being posted, cry about it
and i'm allowed to clown on the cumbrained crybabies who whine about no naked men being pposted on their blue board.

>>40991686
Yes, he should be nude

anyway back to playing hollow knight

anyway back to my thing i was doing before i decided to hop in to voice my unasked-for-opinion.

>>40991689
kek

I wish she had married a white American guy and had kids

>>40991688
someone linked to a video of a literal murder on a blue board why arent you bitching about that

>>40991705
oh? back to destroying your liver then?

>>40991705
Can I see another lewd please. You are so perfect at that time. Sorry if that's cringe

>>40991688
i never said anything about wanting naked men to be posted, just men in general

>>40991707
its an educational video, i would show it to white children even

>>40991717
that's not my point

>>40991721
Get out foid

>>40991707
why are you clicking links on 4chan with no previous context.
>>40991710
were my liver be destroyed i would surely be dead or dying by now...

>>40991688
why are you so annoyed by images of men?

>>40991727
if that's your takeaway then you are retarded lol.

>>40991726
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Present_continuous

>>40991726
i didn't click it i saw replies saying what it is
>>40991723
lol

>>40991726
that's not how it works, alcoholics get fatty liver disease that eventually becomes cirrhosis and they will either need a transplant or die
if you constantly get pain under your ribcage you probabaly are having liver issues

>>40991735
What's your problem - you wish the nigger killed you instead? Women are the bane of my existence vro

>>40991736
It killed my great uncle at 74. Tex only has 44 more years to live!

>>40991734
i be continuously present.
>>40991735
okay? then what is the issue lol retards will be retards and post edgy shit.
>>40991736
well i don't have pain under my ribs or jaundice so i think my liver is okay.

If autistic people can live their entire lives without having sex, why can’t you?

>>40991741
>severe fatty liver disease can cause a bloated or puffy face, as fluid builds up in facial tissues when the liver is unable to regulate fluid balance

texanon has many pics where their face is clearly puffed up and bloated

>>40991744
exactly so why are you getting mad abt gay pics

>>40991746
She's a foid she lies about how much she drinks. U think she's really doing Bam Margera levels of partying?

>>40991748
How can i look like that baka

>>40991745
you should be glad men are having sex with other men consensually, if we couldn't do that we'd probably go after children or animals like they do in Muslim countries

>>40991752
i'm not lol i'm mad that anon is whining about not enough goon material on a blue board.

>>40991760
Give me pics of y to goon to.pls

Tranny gangbang with tex, cheeza, and Winona

gay if you wouldn't

>>>/s4s/12517570
Mr krabs = me
Plankton = shiza

>>40991762
I'll create them and sexualize texanon.

>>40991783
Lmao can you make her a femboy with feminine body though?

>>40991774
Yeah I wou crawl through broken glass for Olivia bro bro

>>40991774
>ankle straps
Ick + red flag + gross mid woman + ugly + L

>>40991823
who still has the pic of her in the confederate flag leotard

>>40991823
Make Tex look like this please

I'm posting whatever i want.

Screw you gay gen

Stop posting this tranny creature

lol

I love feminine boys and you can't stop me

I love the smell of uncut cock

>>40991897
you'll run out of pics eventually

>dicks are worse than cigarettes cigs take 15 min of you life dicks 15 years
Gowrl thats so deep

>>40991940
finally an accurate ai image.

>>40991931
kissing is worst than sex
i got mono from kissing
never got anything from sex yet

>>40991896
Would lift his skirt and have a go

>>40991910
You don't know me bruh I'm sick ina head

>>40991926
This is so good, the best one yet scenester tex would have been my perfect bf

neo teenies

>>40991712
cute eighteenie

>>40992006
i'm gonna kill my self because of how much i want to fuck this person right now holy shit this is unbearable

>>40992032
iktf bro. life is suffering with no neo teenies

Reminder that femboy was coined by pedophiles to refer to underaged boys.

>>40990725
>>40990798
>>40990842
this is such an utterly bizarre thing to say. yes, i COULD simply never have sex again and only masturbate. just like i COULD live the rest of my life only eating the most tasteless, unenjoyable food possible and drink only water. but why the fuck WOULD i, or anyone else? what do i win by making my life less fulfilling? giving up sex would also mean big difficulties in romance because most of your partners are gonna want to have it, and romance, just like sex, is one of the best things in life. why don't you, anon, live the rest of your life avoiding any possible form of fulfillment you could have?

would you pick up this slut?

masturbation is worst than having sex... there's no exchange of energy, its very selfish

>>40992068
lol
yea

>>40992053
how did he fall off so bad

>>40992097
if he's fat and cracked idwtk. life happens sis

I liked it better when they just acknowledged that gooners were mental degenerates and locked them in asylums to keep them from annoying civilization.

If youre spending every night tugging your dick staring at a phone or monitor and dont think you need medical isolation, I got some bad news.

>>40992164
I've never gooned over anything posted on 4chan

do you guys really think slayer walks around at night stroking his dick in public over femboys posted on here?

>>40992200
I hope so

>>40992200
I think there are other issues on his mind like finding a shelter or finding food or not getting chased out by other homeless people or not getting assaulter by teens with molotovs

>>40992200
people do be having butt sex in those homeless tents
when i use to walk through the woods to school i would see some of them and they always smelled like fecal matter the closer i got to them

Gays will wonder why men prefer fucking women.

Because its literally no shit.

>>40992261
that's a lie, many women poop during sex if they really get into it and submit

>>40992261
The vagina is literally 2 cm from the butthole its always full of shit and they dont even have the option to sword fight or for shot free oral or shit free anything if you touch a vagina youre touching shit :]

what bizarre copes

ikr?

Straight guys agree with me

Female anus too close to vagina

Hi,

I've been with a few women in my life and one thing I've noticed is that the female anus is incredibly close to the vagina, in fact they're barely an inch apart.

I'm not sure about other guys - but doesn't this disturb you? It feel like a design flaw in women actually -- like they're supposed to be so feminine and beautiful yet this ghastly little oversight is ruining everything.

Somehow it feels to me that women should be more aware of this flaw and it should affect their confidence. Whenever I see a so-called beautiful woman walking down the street so care-free thinking she's all that I just remember her anus is only 1 inch away from her pussy and laugh her into oblivion.

Women: Please accept that they're too close together, let it negatively affect your confidence and so make yourselves more readily available sexually as a result. Afterall, we're having to sleep with a creature whos ANUS is only 1 inch away from the vagina --- you should not make this difficult. It's unappetizing enough as it is. We're doing you a favour.

Men: Do not let women forget this flaw, and do not forgive them for it. Remind them of it constantly less they get inflated egos and think they're all that

They're just too close together, sorry, but its true.

Selling my ahh at the bodega

yay lets talk about vaginas

>>40991774
she just looks annoying. like a dead fish.

>>40992390
Honestly, women have a wholllllllle list of problems before you get to butt hole positioning.

The one thing I agree with women on is that everything is mens fault, including them. Men are responsible because only men can be. Women are closer to children or animals, blacks and dont have the same capacity for reason.

So shitty men make shitty fathers who make shitty women, and more shitty men. If shes a shit woman, its her fathers fault. If shes a shit mother, its the fathers fault.

This is why I have grown to respect muslims. Call them primitives, but at least they know that a female is more a 'type' of human than an actual human. If you think its stupid to give a little boy the responsibility of an adult man, then treating a woman as such should seem equally stupid.

I skp my usual rant on the scientific rationale for reclassifying human females as a mammal product rather than a species member, but there it is.

odds: go put gas in the car, buy smokes, come home and swipe on lauma
evens: save, car needs oil change

>>40992422
cigs are more important than a car

>>40992418
LMFAO

>>40992426
i scheduled the oil change. need to get back and forth to work to buy more cigs.

really wanted to blow a hundo on centaur girl.

Looks like the femboy tranny didnt make it too bad so sad you didnt even last a day

thoughts on dolphins?

>>40992520
i’m not sure if dolphins are large enough but a sperm whale could rupture your prostate with echolocation

>>40992520
i remember watching a vid of a guy jerking a dolphin off and that story of a guy regularly hooking up with a wild female dolphin and going into great detail about how great dolphin pussy is cuz its so muscular and milks your dick crazy style or whatever

>>40992520
https://youtu.be/p7ruBotHWUs

>>40992540
john c lilly had a dolphin lab and one of the experiments was trying to teach dolphins to speak and the lady responsible developed a sexual relationship with the dolphin who was named peter peter and he committed suicide by drowning after the facility shut down due to lack of funding

When a male dolphin is interested in you, about the only thing you can do, if you are male, is to masturbate him. (Unfortunately, I cannot speak for the female of the human species... it seems women just don't like dolphins enough... so I cannot say for sure if it is safe to mate with them. I would suspect not, due to a dolphins size, but then again, I cannot say for a woman.)

WARNING! In the considerations of safety, you should NEVER let a male dolphin attempt anal sex with you. The Bottle-nose dolphin member is around 12 inches, very muscular, and the thrusting and the force of ejaculation (A male can come as far as 14 feet) would cause serious internal injuries, resulting in peritonitus and possible death. Unless you are the masochistic type, you will have a hard time explaining your predicament to the doctors in the emergency ward....

A male dolphin's member is roughly S-shaped, tapered at the end. If you are in the water with them, it is best to support the dolphin on his side, just under the water, with one hand, and handle him with the other. Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gently massaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it's length. It feels very much like the rest of the dolphin (ie. smooth and rubbery to the touch, but firmer). It doesn't take long for the male to ejaculate, around 40 seconds to a minute, and this is usually accompanied by either shuddering just prior to ejaculating, and thrusting and tail-arching during ejaculation. The force of ejaculation can be powerful at times, so it is best to keep your face out of the line of fire, or keep his member underwater. You can attempt to lick and suck on the end of it while masturbating as well, but be warned, do not try to give full throat, and get the hell out of the way before he ejaculates! A male dolphin could snap your neck in a accidental thrust, and that would be the end of that relationship.

I've made a decision based on this thread.

If I ever talk to a homosexual in real life due to whatever unfortunate situation led to that scenario, and somehow we end up talking about marine life and he turns the subject to dolphin sex, I do not care what fines I have to pay or jail time I get. I am going to punch that motherfucker in the jaw and not stop until he is on the ground.

People will call you homophobic as if you have no reason. Because they never read these threads and see how gays think when they are anonymous and don't think normal people are watching. Right in the jaw.

Not the teeth. I don't want to get its blood on me.

>>40992582
classic

>>40992586
So female dolphins have vaginal secretions that make a male dolphin just cum over and over and over. From this point on, I will call these secretions “Dolphin Pussy Jelly.” Scientists were like “holy shit, dude we gotta test this. You know, for science.” So the scientists collected a sample of said Dolphin Pussy Jelly, and had a test primate. They swabbed it on the male primate’s dick, sat back and watched the show. Now you see, it worked. But it worked a little too well. The monkey straight up had a heart attack because it used all of its energy into fucking cumming. I want to like in a world where this is a commercial product. I want I to say “you know what, I want to die and I know what to do about it.” I want to live in a world where I can go into my local grocery store, pick up a bottle of “Smucker’s Dolphin Pussy Jelly,” and just fucking cum myself to death.

>>40992586
i mean.
you can try, but if they take out a gun a and shoot you then it's your own fault.
that's kinda the point. you don't go around picking fights with people because you might pick a fight with the wrong side of crazy.

>>40992596
there is literally zero evidence that a homosexual has ever fired a gun

>>40992586
Would you mate with a dolphin giga pussy dick milking monster?

Mating: This is harder. Obviously, being human, it is awkward, but not impossible to mate in open water. It is easier to have the dolphin in a shallow area (like the shallows just off the beach) around 1 1/2 to 2 feet deep. This is usually comfortable enough for both the dolphin and you. Gently, you should roll the dolphin on her side, so she is lying belly-towards you. You can prop yourself up on an elbow, and lie belly to belly against her. You may want to use the other arm to gently hold her close, and place the tip of your member against her genital slit. She will, if interested, arch her body up against you, taking you inside her body. There is usually a fair bit of wriggling and shifting, usually to get comfortable, both outside and inside. Once comfortable, though, females initiate a series of muscular vaginal contractions that rub the entire length of your member. They may also thrust rhythmically against you, so enjoy the experience while you can, since you will rarely last longer that a minute or two. Just prior to her climaxing, she will up the speed of her contractions and thrusts. It is interesting to note that the times I have mated with females, they have timed their orgasm to mine. Whether they do this consciously or not, I do not know, but it is a great feeling to have two bodies shuddering against each other at the one time.

>>40992602
Its the tiny wrists, they cant keep it level to aim. Plus they are easily startled by loud noises and confused by technology that doesnt have a screen. Its not their fault, their parents failed to make a man from a boy, so...

>>40992602
*ahem!*

>>40992602
Theres literally video evidence of robbie (blaire) white shooting his guns

a golden bird that flies away a candle's fickle flame

Rate this arse

>>40992637
luv cake imma actually listen to them right meow

>>40992643
11/10 gyatt why is it not smothering my face im cryeing

>>40992643
I'm a bottom but I want to powerfuck men like this until they piss themselves

>>40992637
>their golden baby bird

All jokes aside, idk if you guiz know it or not but there is a gay gun club, called the Pink Pistols or some such. Their motto is armed gays dont get bashed or something.

Yeah here it is
https://www.pinkpistols.org

Im all for it. Idt being gay matters to the subject, but if thats what it takes to get more guns into the population, I'll take it. An armed society is a polite one. Everyone, even females, should be proficient in gun use by age 14.

It used to be a class available in American public schools. Some countries require some skill.

i feel like crap

>>40992681
i've said it before and i'll say it again. humans are no better than primitive monkeys. they don't understand words. they understand pain.

>>40992685
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/06/110602162820.htm

>>40990510
Doesn't r/askgaybros tell pooners to fuck off?

I don’t want to think gay thoughts anymore. I wanna scoop out my brains until they stop

>>40992688
They can understand them, its a matter of how much they care.

I need a bf who lets me call him daddy and who calls me his little boy, but not in any creepy way

i hate being ugly, what is the solution

>>40992699
pretty much yes

>>40992722
Make a big wet mudpie in your pants

>>40992722
for you, suicide

>>40992735
I WILL EAT A BIG SANDWICH

New
>>40992749

listen:
it's not
>we need to ban looney-troons from owning guns
it's
>if we continue to fail at addressing the inequities of impoverished, minority, and working class citizens, we will perpetuate a history of violence

you can't treat the working class like shit or you breed luigi's.