Thread 40993161

As a trans woman who is dating an overweight cis woman, how do I make her lose weight in a way that doesn't make me appear malebrained and toxic?

>>40993161 (OP)
Inject her with ozempic while she’s asleep

>>40993161 (OP)
Honestly get her to excersise with you and not eat giant portions

>>40993186
>get her to excersise with you
That's doable
>not eat giant portions
How is one is supposed to do that and not have their partner notice?

>>40993161 (OP)
No idea. I hate fat women too.

>>40993161 (OP)
let me date the fat girl i can handle her 'w'

>>40993161 (OP)
>lose weight
just date a man

>>40993278
>>lose weight
>just date a man
fat women should be gassed

>>40993298
>brAAAAAAAAPPP
oh sorry girl... ur too chubby and sexy so im gassing u
>prrfffffAAARRRPPP

>>40993161 (OP)
That’s her afab body doing what’s natural for it unfortunately. You are amab with no reproductive ability so your body doesnt hold onto fat the same way. Its harder for women to lose and easier to gain. Just leave her alone is probably the answer and if u cant handle it idk break up

>>40993350
That's what female hormones do, and trans women also have female hormones, many times higher than cis women

>>40993161 (OP)
What do your lifestyles look like? Does she just not exercise, does she eat too much? Probably the biggest thing is portion control but I feel like that's always a touchy subject with people. If you're ordering out too much cooking at home can help with this, or saying that you'll save however much of the meal for tomorrow's lunch. Cutting out sugary beverages when possible helps (I try to keep it down to one a day) but the bigger one is definitely cutting down carbonated drinks since they're bad for your tummy and can cause bloating

>>40993298
uh….

>>40993350
>That’s her afab body doing what’s natural for it unfortunately.
No that's just generations of women constantly reassuring themselves that it's okay to sit on the couch, eat your twinkies and never exercise.

>>40993440
this is retarded moidbrain slop. are u male by any chance? or maybe an anafag?

>>40993524
>this is retarded moidbrain slop. are u male by any chance? or maybe an anafag?


>REEEEEEEEEE LET ME BE FAT

fat fuck

>>40993338
ts artist is so kino

>>40993161 (OP)
This is a drowning man asking for water

>>40993524
calories in
calories out
there is no genetics that force you to stuff yourself with twice the caloric intake you need on the daily

>>40993557
i like being chubby desu. its qt and filters tards like u anon
>>40993618
best trip
>>40993707
im sorry ur transbian ass cant handle chunky butt. she just isnt for u

>>40993750
>i like being chubby desu. its qt
>chubby
you are not chubby, you are obese.
disgusting fat pig

>>40993161 (OP)
you don't, the fatter the better

>>40993750
nta but but the question of women being naturally magically unable to lose weight (they are not) is not answered by how hot chubby women are (very)

>>40993782
bro im 5'6 and 150 pounds. i WISH i was a pig but all i have are these mid titties and squishy butt. ya dumb moid
>>40993788
jesus hated them bc he spoke the truth

>>40993798
>bro im 5'6 and 150 pounds.
yeah you are fat fuck

>>40993809
im doing this for my tits you fucking pedo. good luck building that discord harem.

>>40993817
>im doing this for my tits you fucking pedo
fat fuck doesn't know what to say so he calls me a pedo

>>40993832
anon i think being fat is hot

>>40993817
honestly, i admit, i’m a fatfag myself but stop forcing the meme of “attraction to skinny adult women is pedophilia”. that anon is a dick tho

>>40993887
its ok nona he was too stupid to even percieve it.

>>40993161 (OP)
The fact you want her to lose weight is already malebrained and toxic.
She accepted the you're transgender, why not accept that she's fat.

>>40994317
>She accepted the you're transgender, why not accept that she's fat.
typical fat fuck response

>>40994317
>She accepted the you're transgender, why not accept that she's fat.
Seconded.

>>40993161 (OP)
"Oi, lard ass! Get on a damn treadmill!"

>>40993161 (OP)
if you're that unattracted to her and she's already fine with her weight, you're better off just breaking up with her and letting someone who appreciates her body pick up your slack. Even then, criticizing her body when she's painfully insecure already is extremely toxic and ngmi level malebrained and she should break up with you

>>40993161 (OP)
Start cooking for you both. Lots of rice, no potatoes, only a little bit of meat. She'll be down 10 pounds in a month like nothing.

>>40994426
she'll just start binge eating and possibly hate op more than she probably already does
>t. knower

>>40994438
if she's a straight cis women, then she'll follow OP's lead.

idk im in the same position and i think ima just break up. its too much for me and i dont wanna life coach someone thru it. i think its a matter of portion control like ppl have said here. i also got her to start biking and going to gym but she doesn’t have that i need to eat less to get skinnier mindset that id want and im not about to tell her to eat less all the time. i think its back to being alone 4 me.

OP, I've gone through the same thing and I did get her to lose weight because I cared for her well being. But I didn't actually love her, so it still ended badly.

>>40994490
How did you do it?
Like this?
>>40994410

>>40994503
Diet change, but you need to do it in a way that they don't feel hungry but are still calorie restricting. So either low carb/high fat high protein or high carb low fat low protein.

You can't. It's your own fault for getting with a roastie and a fat one at that.

>>40994466
Based. Get a twinkhon and you'll get someone who's super careful about how she looks.
I literally never find cis women attractive it's wild they're all disgusting to me. Except some butch dykes ig but shit I don't want the drama.

I find it truly depressing that wanting to find your partner attractive is somehow toxic. Women not wanting to date short guys, not to mention someone shorter then them is acceptable, but wanting your woman partner to not be overweight on account of it not being attractive to you is le bad? This is some reddit tier bs. Obviously you should be gentle about it and do your best not to hurt her, but ignoring it isn't going to make it go away. Long term relationships aren't sustainable without healthy sexual attraction.

>>40993161 (OP)
Put the fries in the bag retard I love fat chicks

>>40994458
>straight cis woman
>dating mtf presumably on e
lol

>>40995457
i think dating someone you find unattractive then bitching that they're unattractive is the toxic part. people are allowed to have preferences, for example i am in no way into anyone that has visible muscles, with a needle-in-a-haystack exception to the rule. i wouldn't date someone with that even if i liked them as a person because it'd be cruel to expect someone to change a core aspect of themselves to suit my tastes. with things like height, it's worse if someone dates against said preference because that can't be changed.
that said op is going to break up sooner than later if this is such a big deal to her. something tells me her relationship problems are much deeper than she realizes at present moment. she's allowed to have a preference, though.

>>40995648
If you can have an otherwise great relationship with someone, it will be a shame to let it go to waste only due to something to can be changed. It seems reasonable to put some effort into something like weight loss to preserve a good relationship, whereas it's not really feasible to change sexual preferences, nor is it possible to sustain a relationship without sexual passion. Is it valid to not want to make these changes even for the sake of the relationship? Absolutely. I just don't think something like weight is a core element of a person and I believe that mindset, just like thinking every body type is equally attractive to anyone (or should be) is harmful. It not being a core element is why I don't think you should completely reject someone who might be happy with you and may even consider making a change. There are more substantial characteristics that a partner could have which on their on own aren't enough to reject them, but are possible to work on. People get into such relationships all the time. Weight having this unique status as something you shouldn't bring up and therefore deny someone the chance to potentially have a connection which both parties will benefit from is, again, an harmful notion imo. And of course, you could be dating someone you find attractive who then gains or loses weight in a way that makes them unattractive to you. This should be something that can be tactfully be discussed.

>>40996103
*a harmful
*tactfully discussed

should have proofread more

>>40996103
you do have some good points, however op made it sound like she has zero interest in losing weight. i'd be much softer on op if she gained the weight during the relationship (on average, 15lbs is gained during a happy one, some lose while some gain more), but that wasn't mentioned so i assumed (kinda stupidly) that she willingly dated a fat chick then got mad she was fat.
i'm also speaking for myself when i say this, and take this with a grain of salt since i'm NOT normal in this scenario, but if anyone wanted me to lose weight in a relationship, i'd break up on the spot because we are not sexually compatible by that alone. so i'm aware that i'm coming from an odd perspective and trying to understand from a vanilla point of view.
i think if its otherwise a happy relationship, op can try to mention it from the perspective of her wanting a gym membership (or something) and trying to bring the gf along, if the gf denies then it's clear that she doesn't want to lose the weight and op would be doomed to either not be attracted to her partner or end the relationship. she can also try to bring it up bluntly, but knowing cis women they REALLY don't take that well (if the gf is autistic that may be different)

>>40996103
I think at the point where you say to your partner "you need to lose weight or I can't stay with you" the relationship ends
so it should be either not even asking them that but ending the relationship in the first place, or you say nothing and endure it, and if you can't then again end the relationship
asking someone to lose weight when they're comfortable as they are is never how you end up in a successful relationship

>>40993338
based

>>40993161 (OP)
Gain a bunch of weight yourself. You'll either convince her it's not attractive, or you'll make her look skinny by comparison.

>>40993809
>thinks that's fat
lol
lmao even. thats literally 4lbs above a healthy weight iirc, its chubby at worst, you're anorexic and i wish i scrolled up earlier to make fun of you instead of giving genuine advice. honestly that's rail thin compared to me, too

>>40997242
It doesn't have to be an ultimatum. It's about trying to come to an understanding that otherwise, intimate relations will suffer (not as punishment, but as a consequence of decreased attraction). The relationship as a whole can go on, but a major component will be compromised, and that can lead to its end. I'd like to think that at least some people would like the option to make a choice rather than not being given one at all. Sure, it can hurt, but there are many other things that can sour a relationship which discussing fixing may hurt. Weight shouldn't be off-limits, and keeping it so only serves to hurt relationships. Also, I think that sometimes people aren't actually comfortable with being overweight, they just find it too difficult to change that they incorporate it into their identity. It also doesn't help if they were bullied for it in a way that made them even more sensitive about it, which can also make them feel like they should never change for anyone.

>>40993161 (OP)
Unironically the best thing you can do is break up. If you say something about the weight you're instantly made to be in the wrong. If you say nothing, she keeps getting fatter. It's sick that wanting to have physical attraction to your romantic and sexual partner is somehow super taboo, even though it's literally a basic necessity for a relationship to even function, but it is what it is.

>>41000015
Very true, but I think we need to talk about it openly if we hope to make a change. It's not anyone's business to criticize others' appearance (and boy does this board love to do that when it comes to certain people), but a romantic partner is the one person who should be able to discuss factors of attraction in their partner with them, at least as long as it's not requiring something extreme or unnatural like plastic surgery, and definitely not when it's unhealthy. I remember seeing a reddit post where a girl who was sympathetic to her partner wishing she had lost some weight getting responses saying he's an asshole. I don't think these people realize how terrible it is to not feel attracted to your girlfriend, despite loving her, and then on top of that being seen as the villain for daring to suggest a realistic solution. A relationship without sufficient attraction is just going to be miserable.