Thread 41035243

QOTT: How do you interact with people on the internet? Do you "pretend" to be trans, are you open about your repperdom or do you simply isolate yourself?
last thread: >>41020485

i wish i was a human

I'm isolated. If I had trans efriends or something I'd probably pretend to be trans and devolve into hrt manmoding

I wish I was a hot manipulative mommy gf like makima

>>41035374
i wish i was a human and i wish i was actually trans
>>41035243 (OP)
outside of here i dont interact with anyone on a personal level

I wish those of you who are androphiles could truly invest in being an effeminate gay man instead of trying to be a woman.

Getting a bit tired of this "waking up" lark now

>QOTT
I don't pretend about anything, except when doing a little roleplay (rare). I don't speak to many people now because I find it difficult to lead conversations (I really, really try not to give closed off answers though). No one online knows I'm a repper, but I'd tell them if they asked. I'm open to almost everything. IRL I'm very isolating. I haven't had met anyone for friendship or otherwise since covid.

my life is such a mess rn I could never transition and there's something comforting about that

>>41035243 (OP)
my friends & strangers only ever huboxxed me and lied or tried to push me to identify as tranny so i just cut everyone off and stay by myself now, the cult mentality in troon spaces around reppers is too annoying

>>41035676
I would kill for this
All my friends ditched me for transitioning and I was only ever told to detransition by trannies I knew or bullied for being a hon

>>41035618
same, i was one of those people who never met friends out of school. The joys of being alone.

>>41035688
its not a positive to be bullied and pushed by people trying to force you to be a hon all the time when you know it would make you more miserable believe me

>>41035701
i never met friends out of school but i also never met any in school, how are you able to even develop socially if when i talk to males i want to kms because im malebrained and male socialized and when i talk to females im talking to ropefuel

praying for the troon cult to groom me and hugbox me and sex

>>41035718
That sounds tuff. I don't know what social development you need to be able to progress a friendship beyond a very surface level stage because I am perpetually flustered, anxious and emotionally guarded. I hate talking about myself so nobody will ever get to know me, god forbid expressing feminine interests.

>>41035701
This really only happened as I got older. I was isolated from 21-27 for various reasons. Got some friends after that until covid killed it (plus one of them doing the teenage shit of getting a partner and then ghosting you after, prick).

I do enjoy being around people, I'm like an extrovert stuck in an introvert mind.

>>41035720
hornygen is --> way

>>41035776
repgen is the prayer gen

>>41035794
prayers wont save any of us

>>41035243 (OP)
On dating sites I tell guys I'm just a crossdresser. My goal is to actually pass and I'm solely interested in vers men. I'm 5'5" and in shape so apart from some things I can semi pass. From my pic they can generally tell I'm not some boomer with some weird stocking fetish or something. I don't know how else to put it. It's like I'm pre-trans because I really don't want to get lumped in with sissies and boomer crossdressers. Most guys want to smash anyway but I know they're horny so it's not that validating kek.

Will I actually troon fully? I don't know. The one thing I hate about crossdressing is that when I look in the mirror I instantly wish for more femme features. I'll wish I had FFS and BA done. I'm scared of uprooting my life and dealing with all the social chaos that comes with being a newborn tranny.

>>41035826
bruh fuck off

>>41035840
rude. what did I ever do to you

>>41035854
you are flaunting your hopes, dreams and ultimate desires >:(

>>41035826
you're not repressing anything dipshit

>>41035826
remember when everyone used to go "oh that's just a gay guy" when people would say it looks like a woman, and then he came out as trans

>>41035881
oh ok fair
>>41035918
I mean I'm not on HRT or anything. I guess I'm homeless on this board. I don't know where to post.
>>41035928
farrah moan? I don't think she actually started HRT until a few years ago.

>>41035951
This is very much is one of the most doomer generals on the internet. I'm sure there's other better generals/threads for you

>>41035826
>repper

>>41035243 (OP)
i make an active effort to isolate myself because it would be abusive of me to form relationships under false pretenses and my poor state of mental wellbeing means i'd be a net drain on pretty much any social circle i did enter
i suppose it's for the best, really, interrupting the lives of ordinary, better people with my bullshit just doesn't seem fair

I feel revulsion about socialising as a man.

I am grossed out by sterilisation. People who fetishise eunuchs are gnarly.

>>41036189
idk about fetishism but the idea of male propagation is gross and porn featuring sperm makes me feel ill
I don't understand trans women who haven't had a orchi

>>41036229
It goes against my need for perfectionism. Impotence feels ugly. A big ugly scar.

>>41036229
Have you ever thought that you don't find male propagation gross, but you have internalized the female belief that non-chad men reproducing harms their interests, and therefore, you, as a non-chad, must find your own body and reproductive system gross in hopes you won't try to reproduce with a female?

>>41036267
yes... I must submit to black men... it all makes sense now
unironically do a flip

>>41036267
that's some psychoanalysis you got there. I'd love for you to try that with me, but that's a bit too navel-gazing atp

>>41036273
nta but no one mentioned black men...

i can't even cope with porn and chronic masturbation anymore because it makes me so dysphoric and miserable seeing women get fucked. i see a girl sucking a cock and all i can think is she's so fucking pretty i wish i was her, and it makes me feel so sick and upset i have to turn it off

what are you guys doing today? im going to work on a commission i have where a guy gets turned into a woman by his ex and then his ex's brother kidnaps him. i watched the demon slayer movie yesterday and im playing castlevania order of ecclesia.

>>41036652
play aria of sorrow

>>41036740
I played a few minutes of it but it felt too similar to sotn which I just finished so Im playing this first.

why don't you reppers diy

>>41036766
the problem is that nothing shrinks your bones, diy or endo doesn't matter

>>41036766
i did for while, doesn’t do anything and growing ugly gyno just makes it worse

>>41036766
why would I? manmoding is just stupid, a wasted effort

>>41036766
im diying right now but i will probably stop at some point, as expected im not a luckshit and my bones wont let me ever pass

>>41036766
am i going insane or do i just not understand what a repper is? i thought we were all staying as men and repressing the desire to transition.

>>41036861
>repress
>repress on hrt: identifying as a man, living as a man, dressing as a man, etc with a female hormonal range

>>41036897
the latter used to be called manmoding, before the passoids claimed the title as their own, just like boymoding

>>41036907
same thing, you can't manmode as a passoid

>>41036652
I jsut spent 1 and a half hours mindlessly walking around my housing area because I didn't want to come home. It's a bit rainy and there's a chill and I got soaking wet, but I still wanted to stay out all day. Sadly I got hungry and had no money on me.

>>41036652
Rotting in bed. Might read fantasy literature slop and grind in the Wizardry mobige.
I wish I was dead.

>>41037018
wouldn't mind rotting in bed with another repper brainrotting on gacha tbqh

>>41036766
It is imperfect

has anyone discovered any sorceries or incantations or hexes to turn into a girl

>>41037116
Only in my doujins I'm afraid

I only acknowledge the troonbrain here. I would never talk about it in a non anonymous way. Only my friends know from times I've been blackout drunk.

>>41036766
i financially support my family and i'm a poorfag, beyond just that the money's better spent elsewhere (i don't mind living a barely subsistent lifestyle if it keeps food on my siblings' table and keeps my mum out of the red) the act of transitioning would obliterate any chance i have at landing and keeping a job, and even trying to hide it by manmoding runs the risk of me getting disowned by my family anyway - and that's not even getting into the risk of making myself an obvious target for harassment or attacks in public, opening the door for legal persecution against me, and potentially shooting myself in the foot if things get worse in bongistan than they already are
it's best for the people around me that i rep and don't make a fuss, given my dad's never been in the picture and i'm the eldest child it's only fair that i act as the "man of the house" and support the people around me rather than fucking off and pissing away money on what boils down to a vanity project when we have skyrocketing bills to pay
maybe on a reroll i'll get the chance, who knows, but this time i just need to be as dependable as possible, it's not like they have anyone else to help with stuff anyway

>>41037441
>maybe on a reroll i'll get the chance,
Also praying for this also

>>41037441
Sorry you've got to live life that way. Similar boat, I feel as though I have to remain financially and socially stable or maybe that's the denial I'm telling myself today. Either way, hope whatever you choose works out as best it can. Cheers. :)
>>41037116
pls

watching Wednesday makes me wish I was a goth girl so bad

i should kill myself nothing will make me feel better so why do i have to keep going

>>41038131
Why do we have suicidal ideation and inert fear of death? What kind of retard programmed us this way. What kind of retard programmed us to hate our bodies too.

>>41037804
i'm so sorry you're going through that, anon... hopefully it works out well for you eventually! :)

What I truly want out of life is a straight cishet relationship so the dysphoria issue is sorta easy to ignore. I dont really secretly crave or wonder what it would be like to transition, I know what it's like. So I'm not repressing really anymore, I'm just living with an unfortunate situation and just choosing what I really want out of life.

>>41038669
would you not feel jealous of your gf? Not into straight relationships myself, but I reckon if I was, I'd wish the roles were reversed or something.

>>41035243 (OP)
qott: i'm a cis male on the internet because i'm a cis male irl. ez
>>41037407
part of me wonders if some of my friends know and haven't said anything about it; when i was in college there was a night i blacked out and woke up the next morning having cut myself a lot and none of that friend group being willing to talk to me anymore
>>41036766
diy with no plan to transition seems dumb to me. i've had periods of dissociation where things become fine before, this at least leaves that open; diy would make sure i'm miserable and never passing forever?

>>41036766
I've tried that, I've tried to transition even. It's pointless if you're uncomfortable with being a hon and your life is only worse presenting

It's not my fault if in God's plan, he made the devil so much stronger than a man

repression works

>>41039128
yeah, the no plan thing is retarded. What if diy resources become more controlled substances, now you're stopping and starting? That sounds nightmarish.

>>41039673
I think most people who take hrt plan to transition, it's just a pacing/environment issue. When I was manmoding I always thought "after ffs things will be better" or "when I get a better job it won't matter if I'm trans".
Then there's some people who have a little comfort in a more feminine body in private I guess?

:p

>>41039726
manmoding as a bridge i get but the original question of why reppers aren't diying it's because i'm never going to transition so why would i do that

hrt repper fatigue

never transition

>>41039848
where did you find this picture of me

:^)

:P

;-;

TnT

babydollanons what’s up

>>41035243 (OP)
take your HRT, retards

:P

Is your suicide ideation femcoded too? (pills)

>>41040467
is climbing a really tall antenna tower and jumping off fembrained or malebrained

>>41040521
That is a bit malebrained. Jumping off a cliff edge could be fembrained though

>>41039726
>When I was manmoding
did you detrans or actually transition?

>>41040521
fembrained suicides are attempts not suicide

>>41040467
i attempted w/ pills twice & my dysphoria started at 6 but i'm still faketrans because i never starved myself and turned out 6'2

>>41040570
detrans

>>41040467
chronically, almost hilariously malebrained (still trying to find the best possible way to cause the least possible amount of harm to others in the process, stuff like pills for instance are a no go because of my younger siblings, using a vehicle traumatises the operator, leaping off a high place means someone has to clean up, etc)

Anyone remember a piece about reppers/late transitioners of the anxious/avoidant/questioning type that was being posted in this general a few months ago? I don't recall the name of the author and am having trouble finding it.

>>41040673
muh family

>>41040673
im past caring about inconveniencing. I fantasize a lot about laying my head on train tracks. I remember a girl from Russia i think on liveleak who did this.

whole youth wasted wanting to be feminine, i never had a life

my face is so hilariously masculine, like why is a guy like me cursed with this shit? huge ass browbone huge ass wide flat chin. disgusting. i feel and look so much older than i am

>>41035243 (OP)
>QOTT
i complain about repping to the point where it annoys everyone

>>41040935
twin frfr

>>41040620
I'm 6'4 so hey could be worse you know

>>41041162
please tell me you're a submissive male repper

>>41041279
I am a submissive male repper
;_;

we're all babydoll submissive male reppers

>>41038711
yes sometimes but the emotional connection overcomes the jealousy, and most of the time my jealousy/bad feelings are only temporary and after sitting with the feeling it goes away.

>>41035243 (OP)
Is there a good way to commit suicide that doesn't hurt too much because I'm such a pussy

>>41041605
if you're at that point you may as well make an effort to transition first

>>41041605
Jumping in front of trains, off buildings, shotgun to the head. Anything that's instant

>>41041662
Stupid comment

>>41035243 (OP)
YES and fuck you OP
Because all this repper related threads looks sarcastic. It's all glowing you glow OP
Usually nobody even talk to me
I guess that's cuz ima from third world shithole and esl and I can't even post images
Fuck moderators

>>41035243 (OP)
getting my heart broken by a tranny made me just feel so much more pain seeing pretty trannies and wishing i was them

Need to make a tulpa husband I can devote my life too who thinks my balding repper ass is a woman

:p

>>41042022
same, god it hurt

>>41040717
heh i'm literally james rolfe lol

>>41041662
thinking of suicide? have you considered humiliating yourself first?

>>41042789
not being able to be who you want to be makes you wanna kill yourself? have you tried being who you want to be?

i'm 5'6 but built like a deep rock galactic dwarf

>>41042499
sorry :(

>>41042806
yes i tried transitioning, and it failing feels worse than if i just repped. at least if you rep you can still convince yourself that you still have cards left to play, you have hope. I remember being 20 and repping was easy because despite how horrible I felt. I could think of myself at 30 and it felt so far away it was reasonable to imagine I could have fixed myself by then, despite the fact I was doing nothing to go towards it. But when you actually do try and you fail, the hope for that future is taken away and you are forced to face the reality that you are going to be facing the exact same problems at 40 that you were at 20 except with 20 years of baggage and regret.

Anyway idk where im going with this, I guess that at least with repping you can always cope by telling yourself your real life hasnt started yet.

its like this, whatever you choose to give your life meaning you will be disappointed. You want to be loved and you'll chase after relationships, have bad breakups and end up an emotional fuckup telling yourself the next one will be true love. You want to be rich you chase after money and end up an exhausted slave telling yourself next year you are going to make it. you want to be a woman to tell yourself you can transition any time you want, and when you do theres always so many more months on HRT or another surgery to save for before you finally feel like a human. until one day you're like 35 fucking years old and finally realise that you spent the last 15/20 years deluding yourself that the world would somehow start caring about your dream

>>41042891
>with repping you can always cope by telling yourself your real life hasnt started yet
tfw detrans repper
it's so miserable

I’m so pathetic
I can’t blame anyone but my own hubris
I was never female
And I don’t even care
I just want to be young cute and not ugly blob
Nobidy to blame but myself
There is no hope
Hrt does nothing
I’m tired of existing
I’m tired of lying to myself
Iwmbaw bevayse I don’t even really want it
If I did I’d have done something
No
I’m just a guy

>>41043137
I don’t even pretend I’m a tranny it a woman
I act like a man and talk like a man and am a man
I’m a man
I’m at the end of my road
I can feel my body testosteronizing and growing masculine
It’s over
I’m dying again
And that’s ok
I need to learn to live now. As my true self
A man

>>41043161
I ever even knew how to be a girl
I never was one. I am a corpse.

>>41043137
post tits

>>41043238
Why? They are gross hairy and bloated
Nothing like real girl tits

I love you, babydollanons

>>41043170
It’s pointless
I’m becoming a man
I always was a man
I lived and thought and acted as if I was always a man and that’s all I am
Yes people can change
They can become
But not me
I’m
Stuck

lol when i look in the mirror my head is like one of those easter island heads

facial features all spaced out, no ffs can fix that

most of all im embarassed i did identify as trans and my friends were forced to pretend i had femininity.

>>41043460
Yeah the lies hurt the most :(
I can’t believe I was convinced I had dysphoria or was close to anything feminine
More like close to sissy Mef fetishes
Sucks but what can you do
I’m normal now at least
Free

>>41043614
Yeah very normal to be on repper general

>>41036766
Too expensive

wrote a whole ass essay about different types of tranny pain expression just for the thread to get pruned
reppers are the most oppressed minority.

I can remember having extremely tublr taste as a teenager. Im surprised i wasn't called a faggot more often

Playing The Citadel tonight.
Taking a drink every time I die.
Wish me luck repbros.

>>41043928
holy based citadel enjoyer
just don't look down and you won't want to kys like me

>>41043974
Thanks for the heads up (haw), but unfortunatelt I've already looked down.
I've seen the sights, felt the joy and the pain...

>>41044062
i'm sorry you've seen what's in pandora's box......

>>41043614
hanging out with a bunch of trans women who all look like women act like women and live as women and im like an incel putting on makeup on taking estrogen

nothing like them, they know it and i know it

i dont deserve to live but ill just keep running my life into the ground as they surpass me in every way

i crush up oral estradiol pills and take them to work with me, i work as a barista. and have been spiking this regulars coffee for about 4 months now. hes so cute looking now :)

>>41044401
god i wish that were me

>>41044420
i know little reppy i know but i can only do so much as one min wage tranny.

being a barista is a fembrained job it sounds nice

i think half the reason im a permaneet is that if i worked id have to go work in a warehouse and either have a bunch of men treating me like one of them or id be humiliated by them for not fitting in

>>41044123
It's all right repfren. It was bound to happen sooner or later.
Also, any game recommendations? I recently started Tunnel of Doom, and it's fine, but, I dunno, I was expecting more Lovecraft? Probably my fault.
Any suggestions for something with a haunted, even hopeless vibe? I'm always down for that.
>>41044162
It's pointless to focus on "deserve to live." We all live, so we've all been deemed deserving of life. Best to make the most of it in the meantime.

I feel stuck in therapy because on one hand I want to tell my therapist that I am bi and that I actually used to be trans in the past and have since detransitioned, but I also don't really want to talk about that because it's not really a huge part of my life and I feel as though admitting those things would forever color therapy in a way going forward that I wouldn't want because I dont want to work through trans feelings and issues of identity, I've already done that for years and years, and I dont want to be asked questions related to that, when I want help with other issues that I feel are more important. It reminded me of the only person I ever told anything, my friend, who I only told I was bi. She was amazingly supportive and there was nothing bad about that interaction and in some ways I felt relief that I got get it off my chest, but really ultimately I regret telling her because I just dont want people to know that about me. I want to control people's perceptions of me and am uncomfortable not being able to completely control a deeply held secret. I want to approach therapy in way that I seem like a straight cis man and want help related to being that identity and I dont want talk about being bi or detransitioned.

>>41044594
Why are you in therapy now, if not for gender malarkey? If you don't mind my asking?

i think the radfems that call tgirls rapist moids on twitter might be right

>>41044663
to be able to put myself out there more and be willing to be more outgoing and vulnerable in social situations basically. and me telling my fears and insecurities to a stranger will hopefully help me more secure in myself and will hopefully help with depression and anxiety

>>41044594
>I also don't really want to talk about that because it's not really a huge part of my life
>posting in repgen

>>41044829
If you feel you're still bi, but that can be uncomfortable to admit, then that's something you could possibly bring up with therapist.
The "used to be trans in the past" bit, I can see that coloring a therapist's opinion...
If you say you tried it, it didn't work and you're done with it now, some therapists will understand that progression. That's something you likely have to feel out based on previous interactions.
Either way, if it's not a current issue, maybe no need to bring it up?

should i rep if i'm a bad person and don't deserve to be happy

>>41044900
actually this was a last resort after trying lots of other threads and trying to solve on my own and considering trying to tell my T without actually saying specifics. honestly dont expect any advice at all

I think my face is cute enough that I'd be a cute girl but I have a bald as fuck head, super hairy body, and an ugly flat ass. That's why I don't transition.

>>41044914
yeah the trans stuff seems to be impossible to admit without possibly just ruining the therapeutic relationship as they fit everything through the perspective that i am trans but just won't accept or admit it. the thing about the being bi stuff is that im not really sure if I am truly bi or not, or if it was just the hrt doing weird stuff. even if I am, im still mostly straight and not really consider ever dating or doing anything in person. not sure it would actually help or just feel bad/weird again. thanks anon

>>41044992
Of course. We're all in the same bucket.
Hope you find your best and proper course.

>>41044927
you should manmode

>>41045075
that would make me happier than i am now

its such a humiliation ritual to feel dysphoria over the fact that you have no femininity, im a soulhon. if i transition i know im lying, everyone can see right through it. im a man pretending to be trans. but i still have to transition or ill kill myself. my whole existence is embarassing

>>41045083
no it would not

>>41045101
are you sure

>>41045131
i am immensely sure

>>41036262
Or you are just ok and even like that male aspect of yourself thats why the absence of would feel like a scar rather that how it always shouldve been

how-self-defense bad?

:p

ded

>>41035374
hooman

>>41035243 (OP)
Been on and off 'mones for a bit. Was on pills for nearly 2 years, stopped, got on injections, have switched to patches but still haven't picked em up so I think my T's in full swing atm. I see bangs on PJ Harvey and Patti Smith and feel such a huge ache. I'd go more femmey-butch if my wallet allowed for it/I didn't look clocky.

:p

self-defense bad?

whats the point in trooning when ill be over 30 years old before i look even remotely like a woman best case scenario

>>41046155
You'll be there before you know it. Don't be like me kid and be doing this at 36

>>41035243 (OP)
I completely isolate myself and only post anonymously
I don't wanna make friends as my irl identity (lie) or as a feminine identity that I'm actually not (lie)

I started reading the bible recently
I don't regret not transitioning back when I had the chance any less or feel any more comfortable with this body, but I do feel more at peace in my heart with the fact that I'm doomed to misery until I die

>>41044942
hair transplants I suppose? your ass will change with exercise and fat distribution. not to be a groomer but yeah

getting harder to ignore the suicidal thoughts ngl

today i saw a trans woman in the street and thought holy fuck i wish that were me

i love my wife much more than i could ever love myself though so i will never put her through a transition and she'd never accept me like that anyway

>>41044501
same, although I don't think I could even apply to a comfortable job knowing I'd be displaying my ugly masculine self to people.
I wish I had a comfortable programming job like the transbian meme :(

>>41044942
balding is like hell on earth. not recommended.

>>41046452
I really worry about this. My hairline has been receded at my temples since I was a teen, and the males in my family have that triangular pattern, so I can never tell if it's worsening.
Telogen effluvium makes me so paranoid too.

You know, you guys should give your life to Jesus. If you have nothing to lose, just try it. Seriously. Go read Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John with the intention of wanting to know Jesus.
Best decision I ever made.

>>41042806
thats too embarrassing, im just gonna rot in my room forever

>>41042806
i dont want to be a man or a hon but i can only be a man or a hon

>>41035243 (OP)
i just need someone to call me a dumb faggot and say i look like a girl while i wear my thigh highs and watch dumb cartoons :c

>>41046930
A true loving God would not put me in this body, would not make me hate this body, would not give me the psychological trauma of being associated with this body.
I don't want to hear a damn thing about "free will" either, because there are clearly some very heavy restrictions put on our psyche that prevent 99.9% of us from doing some pretty heinous shit

>>41046452
It killed me. I've never been the same since and I've resorted to wearing hats 24/7 around other people (I hate wearing them). Balding works for some, but not for me. I gave up any hope of any sort of real relationship after the reaper hit (not like I had much hope before that either). I also don't recommend it.

>>41040620
damn, I could of been such an adorable height if I had an eating disorder :c

>>41047020
manmoders: Schrödinger's hon
is it a man or a hon? in that state it's both until proven otherwise

>>41046930
Already did
>>41047242
Didn't do much for me

>>41046930
Jesus cares about the people of Judea, he never saw a white man

I want to slap a repper really hard on the face.

>>41047573
i volunteer T_T

It just feels like transition is just some weird hedonistic desire and I wish I could he cute a feminine but ultimately it wont make me happy or give me true purpose in life like being in a relationship and having a family would. And if I transitioned I would say goodbye to those things completely.
>why cant you be cute and feminine as a guy
it just doesnt feel the same. plus women are attracted to masculinity, so I would need some level of such to be in a cishet relationship

the hrt reppers were right
wetrepping is so much better than dryrepping

>>41047614
not falling for this psyop again

>>41047614
I AM NOT TAKING HRT EVER, IM JUST SOME WEIRD MESSED UP AUTISTIC DUDE

Reppers trying to appear happy and content with themselves is genuinely the saddest shit I've ever seen. you come up with 1000 excuses on why taking e is bad, yet in 10 - 30 years you'll be John 40 gigahons.
I get it though, I'm only a step above you in the misery hierarchy being a manmoder and all. I get what it's like not wanting to appear visibly trans. I'm not bashing reppers, I just see through the happy/at peace mask some of you put on.

>student loans company keeps harassing me about getting a high paying job and making repayments
how do I tell them I'm totally demotivated as a repper?

>>41047665
>the happy/at peace mask some of you put on.
Who the fuck here is putting this on?

>>41047665
Alternatively, living as a man with breasts is stupid af. Good luck explaining that to any partner and wearing a binder every time you leave your house
I regret ever taking hrt

>>41047665
im happy and being a cis man is at least 2 steps above the misery hierarchy
>>41047696
sport gamble to pay it back

wonder if the rep feels would be so bad if i wasnt an incel

>>41047731
I don't actually have to pay anything until I earn more than minimum wage, I'm just blocking all their numbers.

>>41047745
you're probably an incel because you're a repper

>>41047753
i actively choose to be an incel because i dont like people getting close to me and finding out im a faggot. Dont lump all incels together baka

Never been more over

>>41047722
>partner
As if that's even something I want or could handle having lmao

>>41047753
I thought it was me being a boring, ugly manlet, but I guess you could be true also. Chicken and egg thingy etc.

>>41047778
if ur a manlet you should troon out
only tall mfs should rep since they wont pass anyways

>>41047714

this anon for starters >>41047610

>>41047722
>Good luck explaining that to any partner
I'll never have a partner. Anyways, you could just get buff then your tits would just look like normal moid tits.

>>41047731
>im happy and being a cis man is at least 2 steps above the misery hierarchy
it depends.

>>41047802
Nah, that doesn't work just look at buff women.
The only success I had was telling gfs I had prostate cancer and it was part of it lmao they were still totally turned off.

>>41047793
Being short is literally the only thing I have that would help. The 10,000 other things wouldn't, the major one being age. It's way past my time. I'm just living in misery and repression now until the day I have the courage to jump off a cliff.

>>41047768
grim reaper took his hips early

>>41047768
suifuel

>>41047825
how big are they, because if you're REALLY not trans then there are surgeries to get rid of your boobs.

>>41047849
b cups I guess
I might transition after ffs so I'm stuck binding

>>41047830
same desu except im tall asf and have nothing that would help. life is so unfulfilling i wish i was never born

>>41047836
still rly cute tho

>>41047897
you can't see shit

>>41047906
ur blind

>>41047937
they're basically entirely covered. it's just a wide shoulders no hips anorexic man in a wig

I am just a faketrans trender tocd agp/agamp mef rogd non dysphoric hrt male
will never be cute
ugly fat male masculin getitng older and odler and eventually go bald

I'm not really trans because I want to be a viking

life is so hard fatigued submissive hrt male repper babydollanon

I transitioned and hopped on HRT when i was 17. A year or two ago i detransitioned, and am now living as a straight man 11 years after the fact. Problem is i'm having trouble reconciling my mistake and the consequences. I dont think im able to produce decent amounts of test anymore judging from my facial and body hair growth, my junk doesnt work that great without either high E or T, and even if i get close to being able to have sex with a woman i have to hide the fact that i have actual fucking tits. I just wish i never even went down this rabbit hole. Spent a decade getting fucked by other men and now i just wanna settle down but i feel like ive just fucked everything up forever. I've never even heard of anyone who's been in my situation, am i alone? Is there coming back from this?

Not a repressor just didnt want to make a new thread for ts

>>41035243 (OP)
i had a passing transbian pinkpill me but i messed that up too.its best that i keep repping cuz of optics

I hate that I transitioned for years and never had a transbian gf
What a waste on top of a mistake

cute middle aged women

I’m fake trans because I didn’t want to transition as a teen nor have dysphoria for most of my life
Now I’m just a trender

>>41048352
I feel like it's rare to see middle aged people at a healthy weight, or who are even fit, at least where I live
Nice surprise

>>41048352
I used to kind of look like a warped ugly version of this :(

>>41035243 (OP)
being on this thread makes me wanna kms even more

>>41047665
I don't feel happy or at peace. I know I'm probably fighting a losing battle, but it feels impossible to transition and it eats me up everyday. It seems more likely that I'll at least be able to get & hold a good job as a male, rather than get seen negatively if attempting to transition. I wish no one had to deal with feeling like this at all, a very cruel joke of a diagnosis.

I don't shave my arms for optics. It would raise too many questions. But I do shave the rest of my body that I can hide.

>>41048862
why not who cares just shave them

>>41048896
yep. you would be suprissed how many people or even chuds turn blind eye to it. the key is to be unashammed by certain effeminacy you display. unashammu is what unleashes her in a way. it will make you more sociable to be more natural.

>>41048896
"Hey son, why did you shave your arms? You're not a fucking Troon are yea?"

>>41047665
>yet in 10 - 30 years you'll be John 40 gigahons
I don't even have ten years left for that.

>>41049268
dumb faggot just make yourself unhappy for that hypothetical scenario

>>41039821
:p

>>41048896
yeah just transition hon, don't let others get you down live your life

hrt repping is genuinely working out really well so far. i look pretty androgynous now and for the first time in ages i don't actually hate the way i look. i've been going out more, socialising more, taking better care of my hygiene and appearance, and in general i'm just more functional than when i was dry repping

>>41043928
good-luck

>>41039628
How?

>>41050003
these "take your pills retards" posts are getting more nuanced
>>41047665
happy for you to have achieved the enlightenment that the thread full of people who want to kill themselves maybe aren't happy
>>41048896
actually this though, nobody cares if you just look like a fag

>>41050003
Glad it's working out for you, but how do you do this?
are you on low-dose HRT or an actual regimen?
will you socially transition if/when you grow breasts?

>>41050003
i hate myself more than ever on hrt
its just assuring me i can absolutely never be a woman

>>41050539
that's how I felt too. Try to find a support network or something, maybe it'll get better if you aren't isolated with your negative thoughts

>>41035374
hooman

>>41039848
never transition

self-defense bad!
i fucking despise trannies and i never had patience to approach someone homosexual because of the insufferable queer lgbt culture

>>41050781
what're you even talking about schizo faggot

>>41050003
yeah i currently take bicalutamide and occasionally like every 2 weeks estrogel or something.

it works ok, its nice having less hair. but yeah my face will never look remotely feminine.

im a nerdy guy who is transmaxxing cause i cant get pussy

:P

>>41050781
>i never had patience to approach someone homosexual because of the insufferable queer lgbt culture
That's largely denial. Hope you come to terms with whatever is truly bothering you <3
>>41050003
I'm really happy for you <3
>>41035243 (OP)
Light me on fire this suffering is cruel and unusual <3

>>41050849
this is so hot
I wish I was a hot woman who could force pathetic incels to transition for me

>>41050849
that's not repping

I'm a repper for the same reason I'm an incel

:p

is there a reason not to die?

i hate everything about myself. body, mind and soul. i'm rotten. i can't love myself, so how can i ever love another? how can i recieve love from anyone without feeling soul-crushing guilt?

i wish i were completely alone, but i'm not. i have family and friends, but they all feel distant and cold. i can't allow the way it will affect them to affect my decision.

if i am incapable of seeing myself as right in any way, how can i trust people who say otherwise of me? i can't. i have to rely solely on self-perception, no matter how unreliable it may be.

i'm tired of stagnating. it's been years. i have to wake the fuck up and do something soon, or never.

i wish i could go back in time and somehow prevent myself from ever finding out wha a trans person was or is. its caused so much harm to me mentally. constantly being confused about my gender and despairing over who i am and how i look. im so tired

>>41035243 (OP)
im thinking about telling my friend that i want to try hrt tmr. I dont expect much probably and its not like im actually going to do it (since ill end up as a gigahon)
but i feel like i have to share my feelings with someone of flesh and blood.

>>41051429
the only valid reason to live is absurdity. it doesnt matter either way, treat life as an experiment gone wrong.

>>41035243 (OP)
>>41035505
i guess i must be confused about what repping actually is. why do people keep saying that transitioning, even manmoding, would mean "pretending to be trans"? if you aren't trans, how can you be a repper? i thought repper means what it literally means; "repressor". as in someone who deliberately or subconsciously represses their dysphoria and does not seek hrt nor any supplemental support. is it that you think you're agp or succumbed to social contagion or something, therefore you don't deserve transition, and are not trans? because to me, that sounds like something other than repping. there's too many specific implications you'd have to tack on to repping to make it work.

>>41051510
i should add that i know that repper could also be interpreted to mean that you are repping as in representing your birth sex

but i've heard both, so

its a hopeless idea because im too old now to ever see myself as a woman, even if i passed id just be thinking "lol im a man that actually fucking tried to turn himself into a woman because im so mentally ill what the fuck"

>>41051429
I agree with a lot of what you said, and I feel like I just don't want to live at all

>i can't love myself, so how can i ever love another?
This though. I never agreed with. I have loved people with all my heart and soul, and yet not once have I ever even liked myself, let alone loved myself.

>>41051510
reppers aren't trans, trans people have transitioned either medically or socially and usually both

>>41035618
:P

>>41035243 (OP)
rep gen is way too inactive we need more reppers

>>41051931
I just need you, babydollanon

>>41044565
uhhh have you played bloodborne?
also fear and hunger is dreary and hopeless as fuck

>>41045083
are you certain? lmao

>>41044927
does repping make you a bad person somehow?

>>41051661
i think i should rephrase that one. i'm not saying that i have never loved. i certainly have. i just feel entirely unworthy of love from others, so i have no motivation to pursue a relationship.

by saying "how can i ever love another?", i was not speaking to ability, but ethics. in a relationship made of one person who loves themself and their partner and another person who loves their partner despite hating themself, how can they consider eachother equals? how can the person who hates themself subject their partner to their self-hatred?

>>41051478
reddit tier philosophy

>>41051510
you're definitely overthinking this, if someone who's transitioned is posting about iwnbaw it's because of self hatred and not some 7d chess definition of woman
>>41051931
yeah but then they transition and we're back to square one

>>41051931
>we need more reppers
we do NOT need this, if you're so worried about the speed of this gen (we use up a thread once every day and a half or so) then you should ask the posters here if they want to add detrans and or hons here too

>>41052148
we can with them (as their transbian gf)

>>41051478
i appreciate the thought, but this is worthless

>>41047092
Sin exists. That’s why. Not because God wanted you to be in pain. That is misplaced blame. If you want to be mad at anyone, be mad at satan for causing the fall of man and ushering sin into the world.
Every human is infected with sin.
From sin comes things like death, war, hate, murder, etc.
A true loving God sent his one and only son to live the perfect life, and to die for you and your sins on a cross. And while He was on that cross, He had the capacity to look down the corridors of time, and think of you.
1 Corinthians 1:18 NIV
18 For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.

>>41052218
why does everyone here want to get groomed so bad, plz pair off with the annoying babydoll posters

what if you faggots got some friends? Like all of y’all are posting here you can literally link with eachother, You’re not in this alone. Buy some makeup, practice putting makeup on, Do skin care
it’s EZ

>>41052324
im a eurofag unfortunately :(

>>41052276
its worthless to you because you dont realise that the thing thats in your way is your desperate need for things to be meaningful, and then you do things and nothing ever feels like enough, it never gets real.

only when you realise the meaninglessness is the point and your real freedom do you ever get anything that is going to last. do things because they are pointless and you are free from the need for them to be more than exactly what they are, wasting time down blind alleyways until we die

>>41052215
>here if they want to add detrans and or hons here too
NO
>t. poster here

>>41052333
first of checked.

second off i’m positive there is another euro fag in here.
Go get your faggot ass some makeup

>Go get your faggot ass some makeup
haha

>>41052382
he was hurting and she laughed

>>41052324
I'm insufferable ngl

>>41052356
no fags want me desu

>>41052382
jesus this is the most painful shit ever
why would he agree to this

>>41035826
>doesn't want to get lumped in with sissies
>writes the most sissy paragraph
what did this faggot mean by this

>>41052488
he thought he laid it to rest but she dug six feet deep and pulled it out

>>41052452
me here hi
disc is 8008319 cuz lonely faggot

>>41052431
>>41052488
>>41052520
qrd? Some chick put makeup on a repper, it didn't help him pass, and his soul started aching?

>>41052597
exactly that. the guys basically a known repper having stated a lot of AGP things in the past. He almost cried in the video when he looked in the mirror

>>41052597
https://youtu.be/Sjng0TSgaSI?si=jYIZcDvGU614XT6K
brutal

yep I'm thinking it's a good night for drinking copious amounts of alcohol

>>41052713
this but every night
and instead of drinking tonight, killing myself