Thread 41588889

How do I get some reprieve in a world where I'm too cowardly to do anything about my depression? I can't even kill myself. I've never felt anything remotely worth living for outside a couple dreams and a few fleeting moments in my waking life where the feeling fades as soon as it ends.

do u want anything that you don't have?

>>41588902
i want to feel safe, i want to feel loved, i want to feel love, i want my emotions to be anything other than shallow and fake (except sadness, guilt, etc, those all work fine.)

I don't know I'm in the exact situation but I think I'm getting closer to suicide well see in 24 hours

>>41588913
do you deserve to be loved?

>>41588926
yes. everyone does.

thoughts on sodium nitrite? or should i xan + everclear? i think i'm too fembrained at this point to use a real method like shotgun or car crash

A life of suffering, no reprieve.
My thoughts of ending it are just a fantasy.
Every day I wake and try,
but not hard enough.
Too cowardly to move out, too lazy to hold a job.
Too detached from reality to make new friends.
A glass of liquor to warm me up;
An hour in the cold to numb me.
I’ve got at least half a century more at this rate.

>>41588902
this

wjere did my life go.
i want to die. i want to go back. i wish i had parents who loved me. i hate being me. im too much for anyone. why why whh why why