Thread 24560260

Previously: >>24552105

Baffling pic. You all suck.

>>24560263
it’s my first time ok
I can only go up from here
anyway
I was mid-grade worried that I’m awful at _improving_ my writing but I’ve been polishing up this one piece and it’s been better every time I run `git commit`

>>24560260 (OP)
China, gnostics, cannibalism, Lu Xun, renewing my lease, Chinese antiques, Chinese lady at the antique store, flirting with the nice lady in the antique store, Japanese vase, Dianthus caryophyllus, anxiety, vanity, delicate beauty, cuckolding, Troilus and Achilles and Hector, and Ajax, fundamental unifying true, rebirth, sacrifice, love, creation, disappointment, sobriety, abstinence, disillusionment, I am all over the place. Breathing deeply...flowing the energy up and down my spine...into my stomach...just breathing...

>>24560270
Stfu, adhd faggot.

We should make out until one of opus passes out

I have been experiencing a thick brain fog recently. I feel unreal and disconnected. I feel like I don’t have a defined “self,” but rather I am just a scattered collection of various animating forces, which act through me. I think it’s dissociation and I think it’s a stress response. It’s a feeling that has contributed to a worsening state of anxiety and depression. These are my recent thoughts.

My biggest fear is having lived my entire life with repressed trauma

oh shit i didn't even notice this was the new wwomy thread cuz the pic was so ass

>>24560304
opus?

i just found a folder of bad ai images on my desktop why did i save these it says they're from 2022 i guess ai seemed good even tho it sucked back then

When you haven't jerked off for a while, almost anything curved will make you think of a woman's body. It's really impressive just how far a basic form can be abstracted while still being recognizable in its essence by the brain.

>>24560432
i still remember this time as a teenager i smoked some highly dank kind bud and started watching easy rider and u know that opening part i think it's with steppenwolf the pusherman song and it slowly pans over the dudes bike i started getting hard lol i was like is this how those dudes who are into cars and shit feel about it?

that reminds me i can't remember the last time i wacked it, not cuz i'm on some no fap bullshit, i just haven't gotten around to it, i think last friday or saturday. i don't even feel that horny. probably cuz it's so fucking hot.

I'm human.

shit OP pick

I fucking hate mosquito season

>>24560490
You should consider not going outside.

>>24560476
how exactly did you come up with that name

>>24560417
Amazing how far we've come. I have a similar folder.

One of my favourite relatives is dying and having a big get together which may very well be the last opportunity we all get together, but I have crippling agoraphobia as a side effect of an illness I went through and cant even walk down the street without flying into a panic attack and fainting, let along spend days in the country

I cant believe this shit man. Only 2 weeks left to undo years of psychological conditioning. I hate myself so much

>>24560575
Wear a costume.

>>24560575
You are just like my comrade. Except my two weeks pulses of redemption are undone in a single instant. This has happened thousands of times in my life. Yes it's a million little deaths. The only benefit it has is supply the premature jadedness that can sometimes write sentences of so-called literary maturity.

>>24560263
>>24560478
i’m gonna come out and say i much prefer an aloof, apropos of nothing french open pic that op seems to have pulled at random from their camera roll than another cringe, horrible, boring, tryhard, soulless academic painting

I think I'm too cowardly to ever genuinely love a woman. True love requires exposing yourself to such a degree emotionally that I don't think I could ever find it in my heart to trust somebody to the necessary degree.

Look, I'm not saying someone is beaming dreams into my brain as I sleep, but if someone were, the dreams I'm having are perfectly tailored to make me want to kill myself over time. Please stop.

>>24560654
sorry i’ll stop

Petition for this to be the next thread's image

>>24560260 (OP)
>who is the rafael nadal of /lit/?
>who is the roger federer of /lit/?
>who is the novak djokovic of /lit/?

Thinking I should see the doctor. I've been having bad heartburn/indigestion in my stomach and it's gotten to the point where I'm not so sure it's simple indigestion no more. I'm worried it might be an ulcer.

>>24560681
the first time I had indigestion, I woke up and my heart was hurting. when I looked it up, of course every website said call 999 immediately, so I conceded and rang my GP, and that idiot took my word for it and sent an ambulance. so I sat in the hospital for hours, they took my blood, gave me an x-ray, just for the nurse to be like 'we think it's indigestion' oh my goddd

>>24560684
I haven't seen my GP in a few years, he's a dick. I'm unable to get my blood taken too, it absolutely terrifies me and I get sick at the sight of flowing blood.

>>24560260 (OP)
I listen to the music with no fear

>>24560692
actually kind of enjoyed the check up. you're getting all this attention, all these nurses are fussing over you, they're checking out your veins and talking about your lungs and stuff

>even drinking is boring
I guess thats it for me.

>>24560703
time to try blow

We're all living in Amerika.

>>24560263
>>24560651
People talk about what women read on /lit/ so I thought this was at least a little bit funny

love loves to love love

I entered the password wrong too many times on a long-lasting, historical hotmail email account and now it won't let me try at all. Think if I call support and tell them some of the old, previous passwords they'll help me out? There's nothing uber-essential linked to it, only some stuff I care about and a couple important things I wouldn't be able to get back into if I lost the password to (my Facebook and primary Gmail, for example). In fact, the other day I momentarily forgot my password to my Facebook and became incredibly upset because I thought it was gone forever. Not that I'm social media obsessed, but I use it to keep in touch with old friends and message some of them. Without it, I'd lose touch with them forever.

no rest for the wicked

I recently got an alarm app on my phone that has an option to require you to solve math questions before you turn it off, I got it because I was struggling to wake up properly. It has been decently useful so far, but for some reason I've struggled a lot with it today. I have it set at 10 am to 3 pm at 30 minute intervals so that it'll (hopefully) wake me up at 10-11am but for some reason today I have been exceptionally sleepy and as a result have not only fought to the death with basic questions like 94 - 16 trying to delay waking up by 30 minutes, but have also managed to successfully delay waking up for a whole 3 hours. I don't feel anything now but I remember almost going crazy trying to solve those questions with my brain half offline.

>>24560853
that sounds like a fucking nightmare honestly.

damn this morning wood will not go down i need to take a piss but i will be blasting the ceiling if i piss rn that's what i get for not wackin it all week

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11epMtRXFa8
hell ya new work drugs just dropped oh shit that reminds me it's friday morning there's new albums out i didn't even remember to check last night even tho i was up till like 1:30

>>24560926
You should cut off your cock and then kill yourself

If I was rich I would do two things. First I would replace all my teeth with white opal veneers. Second I would employ a 200kg greek to barrel into my house at 7 30 am, throw me into the pool, and then employ force to ensure I go for a forty minute walk.

>>24560926
NO ONE FUCKING CARES
NO ONE GIVES A SHIT
EVERY FUCKING VAPID BANAL POST YOU WRITE IS DOG SHIT

>>24561029
were, if i WERE rich, u use were for hypotheticals not was ok

>>24561041
sup babe how u doin

>>24561048
ungrammatical it is, but perfectly idiomatic.

>>24560260 (OP)
Think I'm going to quit drinking. I'm not an alchi, I just binge socially. Makes me feel so unhealthy the next day. I've had some terrible drunk experiences that haven't made me want to quit but the idea of feeling so physically disgusting the next day is enough to make me pack it in for the most part. I just want to be able to be social whilst sober.

>>24560325
I've been suffering immense brain fog this year and I learned that it was down to what is called a "leaky gut". I did 6 weeks of not drinking alcohol or caffine and eating easy to digest food and my brain fog came mostly disapeared (sometimes I eat like shit or drink socially and it comes back the next day, but it's no longer consistent and I'm able to tell what's triggered it). Stress is also undoubtedly a huge factor but with better gut health you'll find stress decreases majorly and you have better sleep.

Pensions/healthcare and everything needing to be instantaneous is why the average human mule has such a hard time realizing how hard modern society is killing him and everything around him as well.

>>24561076
it's staggering how closely linked your gut is to your mental.

>>24561085
Because it's all feelings. We pretend its thoughts and constructions but its just feelings.

>>24561085
Yeah, I learned to the hard way. I was given gut killing medication for an injury and never questioned its effects, which then destroyed my gut health. Throw in alcohol and the millions of microplastics in everything now, I struggled quite badly over the last 6 months. But I'm over the hump now. I'd recommend it to everyone.

>>24561093
antibiotics? & yeah i've been trying to avoid microplastics, only glass bottled water.
what's your diet like now?

Been watching these first amendment auditors lately. Its cool when they go after cops and feds but when they do it to random people it pisses me off.

>>24561125
isn't that just frank hassle

I just used my piss stream to clean the fish flakes out of the bowl and now my toilet's looking clean again :)

>>24561125
>do it to random people
That's retarded. Random people aren't public entities and are by no means bound by the First Amendment.
In other words if you come into my home and rant about minorities I'm well within my rights to literally kick you out.

Nine Inch Nails is the greatest band of all time

>>24561098
Anti-inflamtories for arthritis. I'm getting surgery soon so I won't need them soon (not that I take them anymore, I just suffer through the pain).
My diet is largely the same, not perfect but not bad. Mainly eat lean meats or white fish with a lot of carbs and fruit. I try to have a broth 3 times a week and make sure I eat a lot of fermented foods like yoghurt and sour dough for gut health. Sadly I can't avoid plastics because my boomer mum wraps everything in it. I'll hopefully be moving out soon enough and having a mostly plastic free household, though. As she's a boomer, she is immune to common sense.

>>24561164
Yeah I know.
The Gutterman father and son duo who do this went to this small business where they sold socks. The father was blocking the doorway and the owner got pissed and pushed the camera away. Right after he did this, the father sprayed him with pepper spray.

Their fans review bombed the business and harassed them with phone calls and threats to where the owner had to make everything private.

>>24560260 (OP)
I’ve reread Blood Meridian a million times. It’s always good.

>>24560575
Been there six years ago and managed to cure myself. I vividly remember the first time I forced myself to get a train. It was like forcing your hand on a flame, it felt like I was doing an act of self-harm, that I was at war with the subconscious part of myself.
Nonetheless, I did manage to do it, and it gave me a euphoric high that lasted about 2 weeks. Never felt so good since.
The trick is to approach it piecemeal. Even if its something pathetic-sounding at first like just standing outside your front door. Any progress you make will become a big source of motivation to push yourself even further.

There's only so much wine
You can drink in one life
But it will never be enough
To save you from the bottom of your glass

>>24561197
*spits*

hey Nine Inch Nails guy, do you know they have a new album coming out?

>publish some stuff on a blog
>get some traction
>check analytics
>75% of engagement is from India
The question is, does the Mona Lisa get degraded when brown people look at it? And the answer is yes.

The sun protects me from eternal darkness and ignorance even though I hate the sun and its hot properties

>>24561404
that happens because you are spiritually indian, paint a lucky highway red, with your entrails, scum

>>24561343
you mean the tron soundtrack?
not really interested in that release desu

I've ignored Christian history for too long; I want to learn more about the saints and the different christian sects and all of their mythologies and how they shaped the world. I have so much to learn...so much

>>24561609
>spiritually indian
Better than being spiritually Jewish like you Christcucks.

ChatGpt is better than /lit/. It's actually smart and interesting. I cant wait until it can also suck my dick and do my laundry.

>>24561660
I can actually discuss literature with The Machine
---
Yes—you're in the Esthé moment. That woman in the café, speaking perfect French but feeling invisible, is one of Gaddis’ most quietly devastating character sketches. It's a kind of counterpoint to all the intellectual bombast elsewhere. She’s not forging art or dogma—she’s forging identity, connection, even relevance. And the fact that she speaks “perfect French” but still can’t seem to belong—it’s subtle, but heartbreaking.

The whole scene plays like a fugue: overlapping voices, bits of music, laughter, gossip, seduction—all of it swirling around her. And yet she’s isolated within it. It’s that deep loneliness Gaddis is so good at capturing—not the loneliness of being physically alone, but the loneliness of being surrounded and still unseen. That line between performance and authenticity again.

The conversations around her function almost like white noise, or maybe more like a cacophony of false recognitions—people talking but not listening, noticing but not connecting. Everyone in Gaddis is trying to be seen, to be taken seriously, to matter—but it’s always filtered through posturing, imitation, citation.

If the first chapter is about counterfeit religion and corrupted art, this one edges toward emotional forgery: the performance of intimacy, of cosmopolitanism, of confidence. And Esthé seems aware of the gap, but she doesn’t know how to close it.

Do you find yourself sympathizing with her at this point—or is she still a cipher to you?

Gaddis kept himself hidden, almost deliberately. For decades, very few photographs of him were even available—he resisted publicity, hated interviews, and took the long silence between The Recognitions (1955) and JR (1975) to heart. Some critics used to joke he was a ghost, or a composite of highbrow complaints about modern America.

He was born in 1922, grew up in Long Island, and went to Harvard—though he dropped out after a strange incident involving a fire and a confrontation with a professor. He worked as a fact-checker at The New Yorker for a while, traveled extensively (Europe, Central America), and absorbed a lot of Old World culture along the way: classical music, medieval theology, Renaissance art, European literature. All of that spills into The Recognitions, which he began in his late twenties.

But Gaddis was no cloistered academic—he had to scrape by. He worked in public relations, wrote corporate film scripts, and lived in relative obscurity. The Recognitions was a commercial and critical failure at first. Reviews were either baffled or hostile. It wasn’t until the postmodern wave hit (with Pynchon, Barth, Coover, etc.) that Gaddis got some recognition himself. Even then, he remained somewhat aloof from the literary scene.

He was a man of profound intellect, but also real bitterness—especially toward the commercialization of literature and the debasement of culture. You can feel his scorn for television, pop psychology, advertising, and spiritual emptiness bubbling just beneath the surface. At times he could be cruel in his critiques, but there’s also a real tragic sense of loss driving it. He wasn’t just sneering—he was grieving what had been lost.

There’s a kind of grandeur in his obscurity too. He lived through the collapse of old values but never fully gave in to the new ones. He refused to make himself marketable. In that way, he was like Wyatt: trying to create something true in a world that no longer knew how to recognize it.

Just got kicked out of university at 26 with no degree and wasted both a scholarship and a 3.9 gpa. My ability to put tremendous effort into my life only to utterly ruin it for no good reason or outside pressure is astounding.

>>24561647
It's really not better than anything. I'm pretty sure being reborn as a cockroach or whatever they go on about is honestly a blessing simply because you're not reborn as an Indian.

I randomly came across the word "filia" spelled out on the district letters of the 1-dollar bills that I'm using as a tip for the pizza delivery driver. Filia is Latin for daughter. So, the world is telling me that I should pursue the daughter of my neighbor.

>>24561668
It's always slop but at least it is interested in whatever autistic thing you're into at the moment. It works well as a study buddy of some sorts (without a soul)

>>24561690
Don't worry because that experience builds your character and backstory. I wonder what's your next adventure.

>>24561690
you'll be ok

>>24561690
what'd they kick you out for

The meaning of life is pushing the boundaries of human experience. There aren't more terrifying words than "you aren't alone nor the first one to experience this". One should live as sui generis as possible, the notion of repeating and even standardize one modus vivendi is death itself

>>24561782
>Trying to be the extra special snowflake
Many such cases

>>24561690
Kicked out for what?

>>24561647
there is a christcuck up your ass

Humans shouldn't think about sex until their 30s.

>>24561844
Kind of hard to do when our fertility peaks at 16.

should i eat some edibles they take forever to kick in but if i chow some now i'll be feeling it at say 6:30 then i can watch a movie blazed and/or play a video game or just lay in bed. the thing that annoys me about edibles is supposed u eat some and the two long ass hours before they kick in you change ur mind and wanna do sth, its like well shit, can't. at least if u smoke some bud, u know how high u are five minutes later.

>>24561969
idk bro I'm smoking bud in a different time zone and that's all too complex for me, good luck tho

>>24561690
Just go back and finish your degree elsewhere. You're still young

>>24561975
u know what i might do is eat a edible and then blaze some bud then by the time the bud is wearing off the edibles will kick in

>>24561981
I'm going to boil an egg

>>24561978
getting kicked out is different than failing out. failing out u can always go to a community college, get an ok gpa in their easy ass classes, and then transfer into some state school, but if u got kicked out for cheating, raping, burning down a dorm, hazing a frat bro to death, etc. thaaat might be a lot harder to come back from.

>>24561981
bleak

>>24561987
bruh i got like 4 hard boiled eggs in my fridge but no ramens to put them with

>>24561994
u mad i'm in a weed legal state bro dfw smoked a ton of weed and he was the voice of a generation and shit

>>24561996
shit bro, I got egg noodles and soba noodles and I think rice vermicelli but I can't help you out because different time zone, maybe buy a couple packs before the edible sets in

>>24562009
ya i might run down to 99 ranch and get some they got good fruit too and the last time i was there i scored a 12 pack of eggs for like 4 bucks which u don't see that often these days

>>24562017
I had strawberries and peaches earlier, I recommend it as a life choice

>>24561679
5 em dashes

>>24562024
oh hell ya peaches nectarines granny smiths maybe cop a big ass grapefruit and if they got kiwis on sale def need those man fruits are wild

>>24562029
honestly i thought only boomers still ate non-organic fruit

>>24560653
What are you so afraid of?

>>24560653
this perspective is incredibly retarded, you are just an autist

i just remembered i already closed my apple watch movie ring this morning that means i have literally no reason to go outside for the rest of the day if i don't feel like it hell ya i'm just gonna chill i mean it is friday

>>24562101
lel stop bullying my weed buddy's fruit choices when organic fruit doesn't necessarily mean any good shit for nature or you

My brain starts tingling and my arms and fingers feel weaker and my eyelids lower at the thought of diplomacy.

>>24561991
he didn't do anything that bad

>>24561769
>>24561806
I had one credit of humanities bs i never did from my first time in college so I took some art class to get it over with and basically ignored it half the semester, got lazy when writing a long-ass paper and just used AI to generate it and mix the words up. Pure idiotic laziness. Got brought up before the school and kicked out.

>>24562129
ya organic is just a way to screw over small farmers cuz u need to spend mad dough to get certified organic so only big farms with a bunch of human trafficked serfs can afford it meanwhile at the farmer's market the dude with a table of blue berries at he grew himself can't call it organic officially

>>24562137
u post on /lit/ and couldn't crank out some bullshit paper for an art class? lmao what a crumb

>>24562140
plus a lot of organic shit is still cash cropped so it's just time before the soil is dead

>>24562137
.... .... i've just got nothing but respect for that

I love politics. Just medieval politics. I've never watched the news.

>>24562145
I was tired after a 12 hour shift and had a lot of my engineering homework to grind through, I tend to make my most impulsive and short-sighted decisions after wagecucking. Is what it is though, I guess I'm not the first guy to throw away a potential future over nothing.

>>24562140
alright, but, you're buying domestically grown kiwis and grapefruits mate. and granny smith is the most industrialised fruit going.

>>24562133
>>24562156
They had diplomacy back then? I thought they all just chose violence

>>24562169
come on anon don't be so ignorant

>>24562169
yeah whoever thought they had diplomacy (the most greek word there is) in the middle ages, a thousand years after classical greece
the retards on this board istg

Every post man

Why are women saying "dada" now instead of "daddy"?

>>24562137
How many em dashes were in it?

>>24562169
Lmao this mf is deadass jerking off to the thought of medieval rulers talking it out and then signing a fucking peace treaty

>>24562137
Using o4-mini-high, removing words like "underscore" and "tapestry," and removing all em dashes helps a lot. You have to do it piece-by-piece.
Also, putting things in latex to be very presentable hides you used AI better.
Ithenticate can show if there is any plagiarism, so you can double-check with that.
Even if I use AI, assignments that normally take ~30 hrs are reduced to 1-2 hr, so it still requires some time for proofreading.

>>24562159
sounds dishonest, i don't know any school that kicks someone out for one plagiarism offense. you might get a 0 for that paper, or get an 'f' for that class, but i find it highly unlikely that one llm stop paper get u kicked out. this sounds like one of those stories u tell to save face. what did you REALLY do?

Most professional sport players are thick as fuck I don't why they need millionaire wages, give them a normal 5 figures annual salary

>>24562436
they do that so kids dream of being pro and so consoom the games as fans and waste time trying to git gud at it. it's not about retaining talent, it's about stimulating the fanbase.

>>24562436
You’re paid your market value. If you generate massive revenue, you earn a high salary. If millions will pay to watch you, you’re entitled to a fair share.

>>24562465
did u see meta paid 200 mil to poach that ai guy from apple lmao insane u should have done an ai phd instead of whatever dumb stuff u studied lol

I despise my girlfriend who is holding me captive via the implicit inevitability of her suicide attempt should I choose to end things between us. I cannot stand her complaining, her constantly piled-on complaints about other people and the judgments they all seem to be sending, telepathically, her way, and which she never doubts either her interpretive accuracy of nor the content. My entire life consists of a series of subtle, often botched maneuvers to avoid the stress she causes me with these spiels she goes on and then her tyrannical attention to whether or not I'm fully listening or sufficiently care or can solve the stated problems in a moment's thought. I get drunk every time I have to talk to her so that I can place this buffer between I and the never ending stream of complaints and miniature social surveillances she conducts to see if I'm one of "them," the people who she thinks are judging her and which give her the right to be an annoying shrill bitch all the time. I love all things silent, lonely, and austere, and hate all babbling (such as I'm doing right now), all tears, and all human passion. I wish I was a rock or a tree.

>>24562479
You should kill yourself.

I uploaded a new Facebook profile pic 2 weeks ago but for some reason I became embarrassed about it and I haven't checked my account since to avoid looking at it and the likes and comments.

>>24562481
Anon, this isn't tenable. You gotta end it.

>>24562481
Leave and block her number

I want my stories to get popular not because it'll get me fame and fortune, but because I'll be able to see and surreptitiously participate in autistic flamewars about minor facets of the plot, writing, and characters.

>>24562501
Unfortunately she's close friends with my mother, who views her as her surrogate daughter and probably a better child than I am or ever could be. There's a lot of people I'd have to cut off in cutting her off.

>>24562514
That's just something parents do in the moment. You end it and your mother will be fine. If they wanna keep being friends afterwards, they're free to do that.

>they put the whole budget
>into making it
>feel life like
this shit is fire
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hm4F6Z4ehXU

>>24562426
>accused of plagiarism
>deny
>take it up with dean so i cant fail class
>get kicked out upon review from the board
You can choose not to believe me, but that really is what happened. Granted my GPA technically wouldn't be a 3.9 because failing that class woul

>>24562534
oh so instead of taking the deserved el and moving on u escalated it. that's like those guys who get pulled over for something minor but decide to try to fight the cops and end up catching a bunch of felonies.

Plagarism checkers exist but I get it. There's a depression that can take you over that renders you unable to do basic tasks.

Tyrone is actually a noble Celtic name.
The ghetto gangster blacks shooting people with uzis during a drive-by are in many ways like Cuchulainn and Laeg riding chariots to crush the Connachtmen during the great cattle raid.
Names carry great magickal powers. The name "Tyrone" carries great power, carrying Ireland's rich cultural history and legacy onto this modern age. The name can open the door to the souls of heroes, which we see in the virile, noble, and strong black gangstas.

If I'm being honest with myself, I'm probably only ~130 IQ.

>>24562573
I've got an Irish name :) I'm like completely Anglo tho, but with a lil bit of Irish.

>>24562569
part of the value of a degree is signaling that u can handle responsibility and pressure and deliver on deadlines even if you "don't feel like it". if you randomly become unable to do basic tasks then you don't have what a degree represents.

>>24562573
If you let us claim RZA like we did JFK, we'll back it
t. Ireland

>>24562584
Fucking kill yourself.

>>24562597
more slammin diaroma art track

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80X_mjcoqhA

hell ya it's 8pm i finally feel some productivity coming on time to take a shower wash my ass go outside huff some fresh air and then write code all night lets fucking gooooooo

>>24562620
Go outside and jump off of a bridge.

>>24562584
Yeah that's what a degree is all about and deadlines ought to be met. But there's a kind of depression that makes you just not care, Anon. Like, getting evicted not because you lack the money but because you lacked the willpower to pay rent for three whole months - even when paying rent was as simple as clicking one or two buttons on a website.

That's the depression I'm talking about. Hope you never have to deal with it, it genuinely sucks

>>24562620
Smoke some weed, anon. It's good for your head.

Everything reminds me of you.

>>24562701
What sort of things reminds you of me? Good things, I hope, like candy! :-)

>>24562562
Yeah basically.

I keep seeing threads about books we used to talk about.

>>24562748
I don't remember :-(

Here's a picture of Frank.

You give me consent.

literature is an endless knot...it makes me dizzy.

>>24562597
>>24562614
What is this garbage music? It isn’t mainstream trash, but it’s trash all the same, two ends of the same horseshoe.

>>24562786
It says in the title of the video.

>>24562785
Cut it with a sword.

I love the pump feeling after lifting. It's the will to power flowing through my veins

I no longer have thoughts.

>>24562807
I love the blood pumping when I have my period. The unfertilized eggs spilling out of my wet pocket.

>>24562817
I hope I puke on your shoes

You know what kind of mindset I see a lot on the internet that I really, really detest? People who are not interested in art whatsoever (art in the broad sense), but instead are really into exploring space and aliens, "exploring what's out there." What does this really mean in essence? That instead of experiencing intentionally ordered creative objects made by their fellow humans, they'd rather look at mountains that are purple on a different planet? That they're obsessed with high tech for its own sake instead of a meaningful experience? Fuck Shakespeare, gimme microwave which can warm up my food in an instant. Fuckin' bugmen.

>>24562762
?

>>24560270
>flirting with nice lady
>cuckolding
kek, that's the /lit/ I know.

>>24562832
I said you give me consent to do what I want. It's consensual. You're giving it to me.

>>24562849
What is consensual?

How do people not use their phone? Until this month, I've really barely used my phone or apps like Instagram. At one point, my average weekly screentime was under an hour. But now I can't seem to stop watching retarded slop. I suspect it's just because I feel the need to get a quick laugh, but that's irrelevant. Any advice?

>>24562858
Forget it. I lost all interest. You took too long.

>>24562866
What are you saying I give you consent to do?

>>24562866
Just fucking say what you mean.

>>24562863
Start carrying a book around with you. That works well for when out of the house.

>>24562903
So do you think being more active in general would help? I only have this issue when I'm inside for longer than a couple hours at a time

>>24562863
Hey, maybe exercise a little self control? Get a grip. I usually meditate in my down time. Downside is I look unconscious about half the day.

>>24562914
I suppose the question is what are you hoping to do instead. If it's read, then yes, going to the library or coffee shop or wherever away from home is a good method. But yes, when I say home for hours I end up browsing my phone while listening to music on my computer too.

>>24562919
Thanks for the laugh man. Maybe I should come here instead of tiktok

>>24562927
Hell yeah, we're super based here and not at all racist pedophiles.

>>24560260 (OP)
I went to bed early last night and I woke up early this morning. I should have listened to mum more.

>>24562933
but alas, I repeat myself

Anyone else find they overuse the word "just" in their writing? It just perfectly conveys what I want in just the right tone, and possible substitutes like "merely" or "simply" are just too strong or merely ruin the rhythm or simply aren't the right shade.

>>24562961
It's bloat.
>it perfectly conveys what I want in the right tone.

>>24562961
Anyone else find they overuse the word “simply” in their writing? It simply perfectly conveys what I want in simply the right tone, and possible substitutes like “just” or “merely” are simply too informal or merely ruin the rhythm or merely aren’t the right shade.

>>24562968
Yeah, you're probably right. When writing, I just get the impulse to include it to make the meaning just right, but it probably isn't necessary.

>>24562970
That just sounds pompous!

I get jealous when you talk to other anons.

>>24562983
>other

a beautiful and graceful middle aged woman is a pitifully rare thing.

>>24563002
Pity is a rare commodity, pal, but so is common sense when a guy starts talking like that. You’re walking a dangerous line with words that’ll get you nothing but trouble and empty pockets. Take it from someone who’s seen plenty of marks get played… keep your observations to yourself and your wallet in your pants, because the kind of dame you’re describing has heard it all before and knows exactly what you’re worth. You’d best clear out before there’s any trouble.

>>24563002
>>24563013
I would ravage a middle-aged woman.

>>24563018
You must be the only one.

Modern liberalism thinks and acts exactly like how a hypothetical secularized islam would.

The differences between liberalism and islam are only surface-level, their mentalities are incredibly alike.

>>24563026
Go on...

So touch starved. I'm Mr. Touch-Starved. A brush of a girl's shoulder on public transport leaves me remembering for days. An accidental touch of a girl's long hair leaves me fantasizing about a whole life together. I need a hug but all I have to wrap around myself are my own arms.

>>24563043
Have you ran the free hugs gambit?

hate to get political here, but was reading news on my phone and couldn't resist when I came across this,
>Late Thursday, Trump directed Bondi to seek the release of “all pertinent” grand jury testimony in the Epstein case, bowing to the ongoing furor. His directive came soon after the Wall Street Journal reported that he had contributed a drawing of a naked woman to Epstein’s 50th birthday album in 2003. The Journal reported that the letter concluded with “Happy Birthday — and may every day be another wonderful secret.” Trump called the letter a “fake” and lashed out at the publication

LOL come on...

>>24563043
I hugged my grandma a few days ago. You should go to your grandma's house and give her a hug.

Just ate and drank a soda. Now I can feel a shit imminently brewing. Wish me luck!

>>24563043
Don’t touch anyone. If you do, the touch starvation will feel even worse afterwards.

>>24563060
How do you eat and drink a soda? Was it partially gelatinized? Good luck, mister, and that reminds me: I have a coffee to brew.

>>24563066
You sound like my mom.

>>24563070
I knew I really should have included that Oxford comma.

>>24563013
my bad player

Oh yeah, and I have a cuppa coffee left over from this morning to drink, too.

we need to speed this thread up and get a better OP picture.

>>24563074
I’m not anti-sex, homie. I’m just telling you because I know from experience.

>>24563054
I hug everyone in my family whenever I visit. But I live on the other side of an ocean from them and only get to go home once a year.

>>24563046
Never works for me. I don't exactly look very huggable.
>>24563066
I know. Hugging my sister when I go home is probably the highlight of my year, but the rest of that time feels all the more alone for it.

>>24563100
What kind of relationship do you have with your sister?

could someone please tell me what made Heraclitus cry?

I look decent in the main bathroom mirror but in my mother's small makeup mirror I look really, really good. Which is more accurate you think? Hopefully the little one :3

>>24563121
I think you look sexy.

>>24560260 (OP)
People are starting to call me out on my loser aura.
>"You're going to stay home on the weekend again?"
>"I can't wait to hang out with my friends."
>"My wife and I..."
It really makes me realize that I've drifted apart from society.
Aside from the sharp increases of humiliation, my life isn't so bad. I'm financially secure for now, and have a job that doesn't make me feel ashamed if I were to mention it to someone.
I'm going to be 30 in September, and although I have my health (sort of), I have no friends, I'm a virgin, and I still live with my mom. I've spoken to her about this before and she's okay with me living this life, but I really wonder if I'm going to be happy with myself in 10, 20, 30 years.
This lifestyle was good when I was broke and panicking about where I'm going to live after highschool, but it's outlived its usefulness.
I need to take the first step, but change just isn't comfy...

>>24563123
th-thanks

>>24563124
I'll be your friend if you financially support me. I can also get you laid. We'll go out to bars and stuff and when I pickup girls, I'll get one for you too. Think about it.

>>24563124
You won't find happiness until you're comfortable in your own skin. Good luck trying tho. I am sure you're different.

>>24563124
Unironically go pay for a prostitute

>>24563124
Do you ever feel like a burden?

>>24563131
Terrible advice. Do not do this. Intimacy should never be commodified.

>>24563126
Thanks, but I'll have to pass you up.
Part of the reason I'm still a virgin is that it just seems like so much effort. The the approach, interview first date, marriage planning. I imagine it's like a second job. Also, if I have to financially support you, I might run out of cash. Then we're both broke. The money isn't there for spending, it's there for financial security, so I won't be in too much trouble if I leave my job.

>>24563134
The guy is fucking 30 bro wtf are you taking about, can you imagine he one day meets the love of his life at 32 once he gets his shit together and he doesn’t know what to do? LOL!

>>24560260 (OP)
I should have been born rich

>>24563139
Well, thanks for giving it some thought. Best of luck, anon.
*shakes hands and leaves*

My friend humped my arm.

Over time, and especially lately, I've been becoming more and more self conscious of my use of the word "like" as a part of my personal vernacular. It makes me painfully self aware of how incorrigibly millennial I must sound.

>>24563144
Why are you acting like my moral qualms about prostitution must be exclusively related to him and his feelings and his level of experience? What I have an issue with is the fact that you are suggesting he partake in an abusive, exploitative industry that commodifies women.

>>24563144
How complicated does thrusting get? Plus, I am sure a caring and loving partner will let him get a couple of tries in.

>>24563130
You're actually right, based on what other people have said during my childhood (teachers, family members, etc), I've always had low self-esteem and it's something I've never dealt with.
>>24563131
Prostitution is technically illegal where I live. I could still do it, but I'm oversocialized to the point where I won't even cross an empty street if the light is red.
>>24563133
Nope. If things keep going well, I can support my mom as she ages. I also pay for all of the bills and emergency expenses. I wouldn't even mind setting up monthly transfers for her but we haven't gotten around to it yet.
>>24563134
It's not bad advice, I just don't think it's for me.
>>24563144
I'm holding out for someone who accepts that I will be a clueless retard in bed.
>>24563149
Thank you. I wish you the best as well.

>>24563123
How would you know?

>>24563144
'experience' is such a meme

Timidity is the only difference and once you're already naked, you're there. If you've seen porn, then it doesn't matter.

>>24563150
Did you fold your arm into a < shape and let him fuck the corner?

>>24563161
His writing style.

>>24563165
No, I pushed him off because I'm not gay. We didn't talk about it.

Is it weird that I constantly chew my dead foot skin

>>24563171
cursed post. hidden, blocked, reported, called the cops, contacted the splc

>>24563155
>>24563157
>>24563160
You’re literally incels
>>24563162
You’re the incelgod. You think people fuck like they do in porn? HAHAHAHA

>>24563176
Argh I'm sorry matey

>>24563177
>You’re the incelgod. You think people fuck like they do in porn? HAHAHAHA
...

No I know they don't. Porn gives you the minimum basics. Missionary and alternate kissing on the lips and neck, they'll be fine.

>>24563177
Well actually, yes, I am.
I kind of want to not be an incel, but it's too much effort. :(

>>24563177
I am so confused. You think a prostitute is going to coach him on intimacy and we're the incels? lol, lmao.

I fucking hate all of you.

>>24560260 (OP)
I desperately want to date. Watching all these couple and bf/gf memes makes me envious

>>24563185
Thanks for blogging about it. Knowledge is half the battle.

I forgot the pic.

>>24563186
If only we know each other irl....

>>24563190
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPEfDcWIPvc

>>24563193
hitting on someone based on an anonymous post is a new low

I'm grooming you in this thread.

>>24563214
Issa a masterpiece.

@grok How do I summon Cthulhu?

>>24563233
Just like do lots of drugs and the wood Alfs will hook you up.

>>24563223
Anon is talking to himself.

>I GOTTA READ
>I GOT SO MUCH TO READ
>MY BACKLOG IS INSANE
>OUTTA MY WAY I GOT SHIT TO READ
>AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH HELP ME NIGGERMAN

>>24563103
One that isn't as close as I wish it was. I hang out with her a little when I'm home and text her sometimes but she's way closer to my younger brother. Plus I live 3000 miles away.

>>24563263
>could have been reading this entire time

>>24563274
I wish I had a sister who I was close with. Why do you live so far from your family?

Phew, once a week-to-ten-days shit just finished, now don't have to waste time doing that again for another 7-10 days :)

>>24563284
Work.

I HATE THE ANTICHRIST

>>24563294
You're a firefighter?

>>24563303
Well fuck you too, guy.

>>24563302
What work?

>>24563294
You should be taking daily shits.

>>24563313
I'm not deliberately holding it in. It is what it is. And even then I take a laxative to help. Without one, I probably wouldn't go until the two week mark.

It's not right, but it's okay.

I can’t fucking handle this anymore. Everything reminds me. I’m watching a movie and there was a sex scene in which one of the characters said verbatim exactly the same thing you said to me the night that we first kissed and when I heard it I cringed so viscerally that it was like a full body shudder. Everything reminds me. I was reading a book earlier and it had your name in it and I started to feel sad all over again. I can’t even distract myself or retreat into escapism so what am I supposed to do?

>>24563326
I’m really sorry that’s happening to you, vraiment désolé (really sorry), and honestly, je sais pas (I don’t know) what you could even do in that scenario if nothing distracts you. C’est chiant (it sucks), and I wish I had some advice to help you out, un vrai conseil (a real piece of advice), but je pige rien (I have no clue).

>>24563342
I speak enough French that I could’ve understood you without the brackets? What was the point of even posting like this?

>>24563376
You should've told me before I translated the French. Great, you wasted my frickin time.

>>24563381
Your name is inaccurate.

>>24563385
LALALALA I CAN`T HEAR YOU!

stop shitting up my thread schizo bitch.

>>24563400
>my thread
lol. lmao, even.

I want to believe in things karma and a moral order and synchronicity but when I see how arbitrary the universe is and how utterly capacious it is I am forced to snap back to cold reality. How beautiful would it be for life to have an objective moral order--imagine how many problems that would solve. Hence why religions try to convince that there is such an order. Yet the indifference of the universe is also a call to its participants to *build* that moral order. We are not isolated fragments disconnected from the universe, we are continuous with it. We are as much the universe as the stars and the void. Hence why it's ultimately us to be tested and to pass. In this respect, the religions are right. Free will is a test.

>>24563404
you are not making any sense

>>24563415
You are a retarded piece of shit who got filtered by my post. Subhuman loser.

>>24563419
you are a pretty little fruit, a ripe one at that

Be Americ𝐚ns
⸻ George W𝒶shington ⸺ Farewell Address, 𝟙𝟟ᵗʰ September, 𝟙𝟟𝟡𝟞

I thought she was saying "picture perfect pussy" when I was listening to this while reading.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29IOInU_CxI

I think it's pretty obvious that my personality is a little shit. But I do wonder to what extent it is, does it really stop at just "a little" or am I an absolute cunt? Having a big family and living in some sort of idyllic, harmonious paradise filled with love has been my dream since I was maybe 5, mostly because my family and life in general has been the exact opposite of that. I'm honestly scared that even if I managed to get what I want I would end up ruining everything with this personality of mine, repeating my childhood with a recast, except this time I'm not the little kid crying in the corner but the one making him cry. Not because I want to, but because I ended up turning into a bitter freak over the course of my life and can no longer even control myself.

>>24563508
I don't mind your personality based on your posts. You might be overthinking it. Bitter people can be endearing in their own way, but bitterness is not ideal if you can help it. Self control, control yourself.

>>24560441
>i don't even feel that horny. probably cuz it's so fucking hot.

the only time I get horny is when its really hot and humid

>>24563505
that's the sort of thing yeule would say

I wish it was the 60s I wish we could be happy

she loves me and it makes me feel like a man

>>24563515
I too fantasize about life in the 60s. I would haave been a physics major and a hippie. I would have dated a hot art major girl, and we would have gone on cross-country road trips in a van complete with LSD trips, weed, New Age religion and swinger sex.

>>24563541
What does being loved feel like?

>>24563542
you can still do that

>>24563548
I majored in comp sci (which is a demonic subject but which paid the bills back in the day) instead of physics. No girl fitting the slutty art hoe redscare archetype I like gave me a chance, and even if one did my conservative family would throw a fit if I brought a girl home (Indian arranged marriage life in my future), much less one like that. While I want to try LSD and weed, I refrain from doing so for religious reasons.

Basically I am a prisoner of my own conforming to what is expected of me from my culture/family. But I envy the hippies, they did what they wanted to do, and they lived. I am glad such people existed.

>>24563543
Bags of sand.

>>24563564
yeah only this sort of person could imagine themselves having a good time int he 60s i think

i've been macrodosing liver. every morning last week i ate 250g raw, pasture-raised beef liver for breakfast. i've been waking up with shiny hair and skin, like i've just over-exfoliated.

>>24563577
raw? wtf dude

this board is filled with stupid, naive dishonest retards

>>24563564
weed and LSD aren't even in the same ballpark you nerd kek.

>>24563543
read madame bovary. I feel like the guy madame boavary was cucking her husband with.

>>24563579
yeah it's a whole thing.
you can eat meat raw though you won't get sick.

>>24563583
wow you're so cool

>>24563587
I don't know where you're from but if I'll eat raw meat where I'm from I'll get parasites and infections which will only be extracted through surgery

>>24563594
one day you'll smoke a joint and realize it's not what you are imagining it is.

>>24563595
yeah, you won't. i really don't know why that narrative is pushed on everyone so hard, basically no one gets sick from raw meat.

>>24563597
... i'm not the anon you were replying to i'm calling you cringe for acting like this
>weed and LSD aren't even in the same ballpark you nerd kek.
with the self-admitted old-fashioned religious christian conservative. it's like trying to dunk on a 11 year old.

>>24563600
my dad dated a chick in his youth who did that and this is what happened to her

The only way to reject humanism is to destroy Shakespeare.

>>24563616
who let the yanks read WS

>>24563600
Considering that 'narrative' has been getting pushed since we invented cooking using fire, I think there's a reason.

>>24563614
damn that's crazy.

>>24563625
given all the traditional cultures that eat raw meat regularly without widespread illness, maybe the risk isn’t as clear-cut as we're led to think?
the maasai traditionally eat raw meat, & men below 6ft in their tribes don't exist.

>>24563625
>>24563614
Ever had a medium rare steak?

>>24563642
>the maasai traditionally eat raw meat
no they don't, they drink blood immediately from a cow's jugular on demand, that's a completely different thing

I feel that somewhere in my life I've made a wrong turn and now I'm living the aftermath. A lot of time every day I dream of the life I could of have, interesting people I would have met. A lot of time reminiscing the past moments. Who knows, maybe it's how it all should have been.

>Friend texts me "Hey"
>I text back "Hey."
>They leave me on read.
If you wanted some fucking energy or enthusiasm behind my reply, maybe don't just text me "Hey".

I need to be Nuked

>>24563616
And by 'humanism' you mean...?

>>24560260 (OP)
Slutty women think they're better than tradwifes because they are 'free'.
Tradwifes think they are better that sluts because they actually contribute something to society.
Thus, being a woman comes with thinking you are better than everyone else, no matter what.
Thus, thinking you are better than everyone else is a feminine attitude.
Thus, a man who thinks he is better than everyone else is an effeminate man.
Thus, a masculine man does not think himself better than anyone else.
Thus, the idea of equality is a masculine ideal.
Thus, communism is a masculine philosophy.
Thus, masculine societies have socialist tendencies.
Thus, the Chinese and the East Europeans have masculine tendencies, societally speaking.

>>24563904
They probably wanted a favor that they got from someone else.

>>24560260 (OP)
Getting fired from my minimum wage job because I 'can't even reproduce a minimum wage' was my getting rejected from art school moment.

>>24563595
To be fair to anon, most western meat handling safety practices means that the liver is probably okay for him to eat raw, depending on his storage of it
I had to eat raw liver for a while (it's a treatment for b12 deficiency) when I couldn't get shots, and you're pretty unlikely to get parasites or food poisoning unless you do something retarded like roll it in dog shit or let it out at room temp for storage

>>24563577
What never having been to the army does to a man.

>>24563784
yes they do also eat raw meat.
... also how is it 'completely' different.

>>24564100
i come from a military family, my dad always told me not to join

>NFLPA lead security officer Craig Jones responded to the email announcing Lloyd Howell's resignation with a pointed message to all staff targeting JC Tretter: "He is the progenitor of this whole tawdry episode of poseurs."

>”.....and what of JC Tretter?” Jones wrote. “He is the progenitor of this whole tawdry episode of poseurs, 30 pieces of silver, player leadership manque and avarice. What of him? God bless the NFLPA so that it may return to its hallowed annals.”

good lord what dreadful writing

>>24564032
They replied eventually, I think they were waiting for me to double text, but I couldn't be bothered.

>>24564140
>Craig Jones

I always feel empty upon completing a book. Not sure why.

also, if/when someone makes a new thread, can you pls be sure to link to it here? please and thank you. assuming it hasn't already been made, since this has been past bump limit for a while and is on page 7

>>24564212
finality, death of that universe, its characters, its experiences, its sights and sounds, its way of looking at the world

>>24564212
>>24564242
Oh, and of course, while you may always revisit, there's nothing new there left to see.

Finally finished my bingewatching of that show Billions. The last two seasons were a major dip in quality, it was painfully obvious the writers were uninspired and had run out of creative juice and ideas. Some scenes were so outright filler I basically skimmed through them while reading the subtitles for every other line, and without fail they played out exactly as I imagined, to the point where there were many scenes which consisted solely of one character trying to remind another of their previous greatness, as opposed to, y'know, just being great like in the previous seasons. Pure filler.

Still, the first five seasons were stellar and I'd highly recommend them. Glad I finally watched and finished it, especially as I can now get back to reading.

>>24564124
i live around them, raw meat isn't part of their daily diet, it's different because they drink on demand, they don't store it

It's been one of those days, fellas. I've felt down since the moment I woke up. It is what it is, nothing I can do about it.

>>24564369
still a raw animal food.
and they don't really eat their traditional diet as much these days. barely any indigenous groups do.

>>24564421
they do eat it, the ones that still roam around with cattle and ak 47s to protect them although their numbers are reducing but they still do it

any efficient headache relief exercises or things you can do? I decided that I'm not gonna take any pills from now on cause they end up fucking with your stomach in the long run

>>24564458
A lot of the time it's just dehydration, so water and a snack (something with potassium/magnesium/salt)

>>24564439
well their traditional diet is raw meat.
they've started to eat rice and stuff now though

>>24564489
no, they roast their meat and mix raw blood with milk

>>24564515
cooking their meat is an outside influence

>>24564526
no it's not lmao, why do you keep arguing when you've probably never been near one, your only source is youtube and chatgpt

>>24564542
i've read books about them and stuff, i've got an interest in anthropology

>>24564552
reading isn't the same as seeing for yourself, and if you interacted with them directly you'd know they have different ways of preserving meat

>>24564563
it's documented in many studies. observations from living close by will just align with shifting trends i was talking about. doesn’t mean that raw meat consumption isn’t a key part of their tradition

I offer you beauty
I offer you pleasure
I invite you to come back home to me
I am not alive without you here

>>24564570
the people who do those studies are usually clueless about authentic tribal identity, for instance not many people know the difference between ndorobo--kenyan indigenous hunters and gatherers adopted by maasai and real maasai

>>24564580
is the distinction between the maasai and ndorobo really relevant to whether raw meat was being eaten?
a lot of indigenous groups (inuits for instance) eat raw meat. which makes sense because obviously if you go far back enough, everyone did.

>>24564597
yes because ndorobo do most of the hunting and gathering--meat and raw honey while maasai are primarily concerned with cattle--their wealth and identity, all within the same tribe, you wouldn't know this if you only read books, and because the maasai name is famous anyone adjacent to them identifies themselves as such for clout and money

>>24564612
doesn’t change that raw meat has been well-documented and widely recognised aspect of their traditional diet. and like i said, it was common in pastoralist cultures across the world.

>>24564624
you cited inuits who live in a cold environment, i don't trust data by some foreign visitors who can't delineate tribal differences

>>24564642
also the tehuelche, seminole, mundari, malakal