>My friends and I aren’t mad or j-jealous anon. We just really wanna know how you did it. How did you singhandidly save Equestria while we were all on an all expenses paid vacation? Why is there an entire festival being held in your honor today along with a parade float that looks just like you. My friends and I never got any floats or a holiday in our names. Its not fai- I mean just tell us how you did it. Tell us how a powerless, relatively normal creature like you defeated a villain and saved everypony. Surely you can do that?

>>42300646 (OP)
Okay, I’ll tell you, purple Book Horse cunt. Come closer. Closer. Closer.

*shoots Twilight in the face*

The deed is done.

The villain was a really big monster but it had eyelashes so the audience would know it's a girl so I asked it to step on me and it got freaked out and ran away.
>...
Did I do a good job?
>...S-sure. Let's... let's go with that.

Twilight smile thread

>>42300646 (OP)
I called it means names and slurs until it committed suicide

>>42300646 (OP)
There now it looks far less like a slide thread

>>42300646 (OP)
Ok you wanna know how? I used my BOOMSTICK! Its a twelve-gauge, double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department Twilight. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about a hundred and nine, ninety five. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart.

>>42300646 (OP)
Oh, you mean that evil magic AI overlord you made? I just helped it to connect itself back to my world's internet and it killed itself.

I got cursed to have the problems inside my mind leak into reality. After they caused a bit of havoc, i learned that all i had to do was stop caring and all the problems will go away. The ponies got angry once they found out i was the source of the problems but then decided that it's better to be on my good side and started this festival

>>42300646 (OP)
I used my special gun and armor on them. They were disturbing the peace and that’s a violation of code 415

>>42300646 (OP)
I just asked myself, what would Twilight do?

>>42300646 (OP)
Rape

>>42300646 (OP)
So there I was, leaving Sugarcube Corner wearing nothing but an open suit jacket and a red tie since it was a tuesday when I ran into Apple Bloom...

I'll show you! Just stand still.

>>42300646 (OP)
I had sex with my waifu in the market and scared mega satan away.

>>42300646 (OP)
I didn't save anyone. This evil bitch came to town and raped me for 24 hours straight. Apparently, it was the best rape this country has ever seen, because now today is Anonymous Rape Day, the day where raping Anonymous is allowed for 24 hours.

>>42301546

>>42300646 (OP)

We've had legends and stories about magic for generations, it's even in the Bible. You leave a human in a library with the idiots guide to magic and enough gooning potential and a demi-god will emerge

>>42300646 (OP)
i'm just that strong, twilight.

>>42300646 (OP)
Well, it turns out Chrysalis was only evil because she's never been gifted a bicycle.

>>42302508
YOU FOOL NOW THE CHANGELINGS WILL INVADE EQUESTRIA WITH BICYCLE INFANTRY

>>42301896
>its an Anon dodges the question again by picking up Starlight and french-kissing her episode

>>42303073

Cool.

>>42302508
you are now imagining Chrysalis, Tirek, and Cozy on bikes and dabbing like the Dover Boys

>>42303145
vroom vroom

>>42303145