Thread 42428998

Big mare edition

Previous Edition: >>42373375

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Fauster's Story Archive: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1XiJRe1NWl_kIoWsHssZ27BMV7bZAe1jgX59-dWggYkA/
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Thread question: What would you do if a mare actually raped you?

>>42428998 (OP)
That's not a little pony at all...

>>42428998 (OP)
That's a big mare

You macroshits make me sick.

>>42429036
>It's another "retard is too stupid to even know what he's angry at" episode

>>42429000
It's an ironic name, like some hulking thug called "Tiny".

>>42429002
UUUU

>>42428998 (OP)
Oh my celestia.... Thats a lot of mare

Colts can't even bump threads anymore.

>>42428998 (OP)
where is sunburst green???

>>42429567
I blame today's marenting.

>>42428998 (OP)
If a mare actually raped me I'd probably be shocked and turned on but mostly shocked.

>>42428998 (OP)
>What would you do if a mare actually raped you?
You can't rape the willing, and when it comes to big mares like Red, I'm MORE than willing to put out after a nice dinner date

Gloriosa Daisy has a sister?

>>42428998 (OP)
>What would you do if a mare actually raped you?
Tell the rest of the herd that she cut in line

>>42428998 (OP)
>yfw ywn a BIG mare

>>42430049
Local human stallion DESTROYS rapism with this one simple trick

Based, never stop.

>>42428998 (OP)
I dont frequent this thread. But ive come to say, this is the correct size for a mare Or stallion

>>42430745
>spoiler
It's not like any stallion would touch your pozzhole anyway, trooncel.

>>42430754
>projection
aww the little tranny got mad and is now projecting like the little fag he is. Kill yourself.

>>42430759
>the faggoid is crying as he strikes you
No stallion would ever touch you.

>>42430777
Tranny is seething as usual LOL

>>42430786
Yes, we all know that you are seething, lgbtoid.

>>42430808
>even more projection from the tranny
go dilate somewhere else.

>>42430811
Not from your mental illness club, take your monkeypozz meds.

>>42430818
>Tranny still can't stop projecting
Dilate.

Total Stallionfaggot Death.
Total LGBT+ Community Death.

Awfully fast janny response time.

>>42430841
These jeets have no idea how the board works and no chill.

>>42430841
Hotpockets are out in full force cause of some slideautist

>>42430856
Is it the guy who has a raging hatred for the kinderquestria thread again?

>>42430841
wew what'd I miss?

>>42430951
two stallions arguing about bein trans

>>42430965
Only expected that they'd envy sexis primae, but still best for them to respect the natural order of things

>>42431592
Chat is this the method?

Mares need to respect stallions rights!

>>42432354
Stallions are property.

>>42432360
Only in Saddle Arabia.

>>42432354
Yeah, stallions right in the kitchen!

>>42432372
Stallions aren't gonna make you a sandwich you sunhat tipper.

>>42432354
What rights?

>>42432443
>Stable 99 is probably the RGRE version of Handmaid's Tale or a more fucked up 50 Shades of Gray
>Me and Caramel have both cranked one out to it a bunch but can never admit without undoing stallion rights
>The book club is just a group goonsesh

>>42432443
>Why do stallions not like me?

>>42428998 (OP)
Is there much art of this Redwood mare? I've always thought this was a very attractive pic of her. Rear at the right height so that you could hide in her tail and eat her ponut all day long.

>>42428998 (OP)
>Fauster's Story Archive: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1XiJRe1NWl_kIoWsHssZ27BMV7bZAe1jgX59-dWggYkA/
#40 has no link :_(

>read https://poneb.in/Zq1hUHWc
>holy shit this is great
>eternal WIP
fuck
any greens about old fashioned Luna and Anon that tries to adjust her for modern society?

>>42432710
Caramel gets off on being murdered if he's the oldest stallion out of 20?

>>42433708
>if he's too old to buck
>off to the chopping block

>>42433708
It's the one thing we agree on

I love mares who's spaghetti spills out of their pockets.

>>42435498
>shacking up with a cop
there are only so many times the "fell on a doorknob" excuse is going to work

>>42435533
So long as I make sure she falls on my doorknob flank-first after a tough shift, I'll never have to worry about that

also, check'd

>>42435533
>t. Has to be told twice

>>42435533
My marefriend doesn't hit me I really am just that clumsy.

>>42432354
enough about stallions rights, let's talk about stallions wrongs.

>>42435533
She's a Manehattanite. It doesn't cancel out, but you'd be falling on a doorknob either way. It's not like Canterlot where the ponice chi-I mean, unknown assailant, just drags you into the alley and cuddles for an hour.

>>42435498
>>42435603
mares tying their tails up like that has to be like the rgre equivalent of wearing grey sweatpants and fluffing yourself up before going out
real sleazebag shit

You guys help I don't have a lot of time I fooled my saddle arabian wives by saying hide n seek is an olympic event and that none of them were mare enough to count in the dark, i'm using this time window to warn you not to fall for the 'harem' thing if you meet some rich princess or sultans daughter
you will be property MORESO than you already are in the west and you'll be subject to some of the most awful maresoginy and chauvinistic behaviors imaginable
>I'd pray in the direction of THAT spire..
>You make my loins hotter than the sands you western colt pig
you've been warned

>>42436539
Tell us more about your predicament.

>>42436539
Rip the Saddle Arabian green. So powerful it got the writefag rangebanned

>>42430465
That depends.
How big...?

>>42436907
Cheater she's peaking!

well it looks like sunburst and son is over for real
here's the replacement:
>(You) are anoncolt
>sunburst is your makeshift dad
>starlight >rapes sunburst and gives birth to a daughter
>she >rapes (You)
the end

>>42437377
This post is confusing. Who does the >rape? Daughter or glimmy? And if so, how much time passes? How old is Anon?

>>42437385
the daughter (luster dawn) rapes anon
the ages don't matter
starlight did teach her how to >rape though

>>42437377
>sunburst and son is over for real
Y-you don't know that...

>>42437444
I ate the writer sorry.

He was a good man what a rotten way to die.

>>42435498
>>42435603
She looks like she fucks human men.

>>42428998 (OP)
>>42429126
>>42430049

>>42437708
She looks like she arrests and takes advantage human men.

>>42437926
Is getting your pelvis shattered worth it, marebros?

>>42437407
unf

>>42437466
What a shame.

>>42438430
Unequivocally.
Indubitably.
Yes.

>>42437926
I want to bury my face in that mare's ponut.

>>42438798
oh yeah put me right in between those hooves

>>42437926
I wonder what she's trying to say? Could it be her tail needs brushing? Does she need help with a fancy stretch?

>>42437926
She will crush you with that thing.

>>42437926
I would fuck any mare with freckles on her ass on the first date

>>42437926
A great positioned disadvantaged by the way it enables stallions to think they should have a choice

Have you drawn your wife yet on wplace

>>42437926
>>42428998 (OP)
Blackjack at that size would break me like glass

>>42437926
I would let her pulversize my pelvis all day every day

>>42440124
>Anon says this while hanging out with his stal-pals, to much groaning from the group
>mares nearby hear this
>almost overnight, a cottage industry for selling packets of stick-on temporary freckles arises

>>42439004
>>42439630
>>42439644
>>42440124
>>42440553
>>42440726
>>42440755

>>42441339
>cowgirl with a mare
FUCKING UNF

>>42441339
I want to be a mare’s favourite stick too, nice

>>42440726
Insufferable.

>>42438430
No.

>>42440726
Kill yourself FOEtranny.

>>42440726
Whoa based FOEchad

Children!
Play nice.

>>42441342
>>42441384
>I missed the fun again
link to pic?

>>42442296
Sure, here you go
>>42441339

>>42441260
kek

>>42442296
https://files.catbox.moe/2z4nax.jpg

>>42442458
based

>>42442445
somehow, also based

>>42441339
holy unf

>>42441260
>Plap a mare with fake ass freckles
>Wake up the next morning with fake freckles all over your crotch
>Freak the fuck out thinking you caught pony aids
>Rush over to the hospital
>Get a checkup
>The doctors figure out what happened and you all laugh
>Nurse Redheart insists on peeling the stickers off herself
>With her teeth

>>42442907
unf

>>42441339
Is he going to be okay?

>>42436502
It's a duty bun. If anything it should be seen like a crew cut or a high and tight.

>>42442907
redheart malpractice is always unreasonably steamy

>>42430117
>>42428998 (OP)
Requesting Glori getting intimidated by the Red Woods who's a head taller impersonating the little mare with a crown of daisies and a paper with crudely drawn gloriosa flowers taped over her cutie mark.

>>42437926
Baring the above I'll take this edited to look like the camp mare.

whimsical thread about to wander off on its own

>>42440757
I would let Soiree beat me

>>42445086
I'd totally fuck a zigger

>>42444760
I want soiree to spit on me

>>42445160
Anyone who wouldn't bang Zecora is not to be trusted

>>42442907
wouldn't that feel like her scraping her teeth on your dick?

>>42444158
There is already this...

>>42445244
>>42445272
this mare makes me feel things.. except below the belt, she already did her part

>>42440726
Insightful

>>42445086
I'mma need a marefriend to keep griffons safe from me going feral on them
fuckin catbirds are built for human hands

We totes need to see more of Red Woods for sure, my dudes.

>>42446040
Do you think she kicks if a Stallion tries to groom her and brush her mane, tail and fur? or Anon?

>>42446040
She's ugly desu
Like the Shrek of mare phenotypes

>>42446119
I dunno, she hasn't had a lot of character development yet.
YO! Batfang! Ruling?

>>42446132
You're trying to get her to sit on you, aren't you, Anon...

>>42446132
>mare
>ugly
Anon?

>>42446132
I think she's cute. I'd eat her out.

>>42446132
Isn't Shrek the ideal of strongfat fetishists?

>>42446153
No I just like a different big mare
That yellow and pink one I think she's cute
I could fix her
Maybe

>>42446189
Did I stutter, faggot?

>>42446260
Kill yourself FOEtranny.

>>42446260
Whoa based FOEchad...

>>42446260
Based, Blackjack is better than a B*tsy oc anyday

>>42446260
I am indifferent to you, FOEguy

>>42446260
Oh, you're that Fallout Equestria autist.
Go sodomize a blender.

>>42446286
Cope. FoE has good characters loved by the fandom, you have coomer slop nobody but one narcissist faggot draws.

>>42446260
average big mare enjoyer witnessing the majesty of probably the only daisyfag to ever exist

>>42446296
>FoE has good characters

>>42446260
I really just can't get into FOE. It insists upon itself.

>>42446296
It's crossover garbage.
With a fucking video game.

>>42446306
Good enough to kickstart a subfandom

FOEtrannies need to fuck off and stop trying to shove their garbage onto other threads.

It has no more reason to be respected than shitty Disney fanfics with Dragonball Z characters in them.

>>42446311
>people like it so that must mean it's good

>>42446315
FoE is canonically RGRE with mares in charge. You getting your panties in a twist is your own problem.

Don't you FOE clowns have your own thread?
If not, go make one and keep your crap to yourself.
Stop proselytizing.

>>42446304
I've always been entertained by how dashfags and twifags are a dime a dozen and change waifus like socks but then you have eldritch nightmare level autists with a waifu no one has ever heard of

I'm fine with FOE, it's fandom enough. While I'd definitely say FOE/BJposting can hit an upper limit of incessantness, but we're not there yet so no reason to complain.

>>42446337
I just wanna get raped by a mare, BJ is confirmed to be capable of it, I can put 2 and 2 together

>>42446342
Exactly, that's content to me

When I get to Equestria, I will fight every single mare that is not capable of raping me

>>42446319
>I dislike so it must mean it's bad.

>>42446375
Yes. Objectively speaking, I am right.

>>42446379
Your opinion has been taken, and put in the objective shredder

>>42446383
>opinion
Nah, I'm stating facts. FoE is shit.

>>42446388
The facts are your tastes belong in the garbage.

>>42446398
>belong in the garbage
But enough about foe

If a hundred thousand people like a stupid thing, it's still a stupid thing.
EXAMPLE: skibidi toilet

>>42446406
>NO U
Antifoefags aren't sending their best...

>>42446410
Sorry you can't handle the truth.
Foe is shit.
>b-but I-
It's objectively shit. And no, I never read it.

>>42446415
>Potent MARE sends autistic man into screeching frenzy
Typical...

All of FOE is pretty bad but I'd still rather reread the unoriginal original than Project ACKrizons.

>>42446415
>He's an illiterate who can only get dopamine activation from pictures
Common macroshitter L.

>>42446418
>Potent mare
yeah, potently stinky! Take a bath, STINKY!

>>42446420
I remember an already story start started with the courier being hung up in a changling hive and eventually escaping with another pony. It has been over a decade though and I don't think it had an ending, or at least I never saw the ending.

>>42446418
We get it dude you have shit taste
>>42446424
Common zoomer mental retardation

>>42446436
Coming from someone whos hot for ponyshrek that doesn't mean much.

>>42446439
>>42446132
SAMEFAG

It seems to me it's the /rgre/ part of foe that warrants remark in this thread, one way or another. There's no sense relitigating the quality of foe itself.

>>42446440
Nerve, struck.

>>42446429
She rewore her uniforms multiple times
Imagine the maresmell...

>Bratty colts
>Arguing about stupid stallion nonsense again
>They all need...correction...

>>42446407
>EXAMPLE: Mares
You sound insane

>>42446457
I will no longer engage with you as you have resorted to name-calling over rational argument.
Thank you for conceding my point.

>>42446471
I accept your concession
Thank you for being reasonable

>colt court is Celestia's favorite part of the day
>where stallions get to argue about dumb shit
>the average human male is even dumber than a stallion and argues about even dumber things
>Celestia still laughs when she remembers the all-day "concession accepting" shouting match

>>42446436
Where did this idea come from that FoE is for zoomers? It's been around longer than you.

>>42446510
>Where did this idea come from that FoE is for zoomers?
For somebody defending a (shitty) long fanfic, one would think you would be able to read properly.
Not once did I imply FoE was for zoomers.
>It's been around longer than you
I've been watching this show longer than 90% of Anons here. Try again retard.

>>42446502
>Listening to stallions argue is the best part of Celestia's day
I knew the Princess was a masochist

>>42446523
I'm the kinda newfag that's been here 11 years, saw the tail end of the scruffening and has been watching since season 2. Time sure does fly, huh?

>>42446528
I used my psychic powers to view Lauren Faust's ideas for the show before they were even put to paper
Get bent newfag

>>42446534
In a previous life I was a caveman drawing clop on the wall of a cave
You've probably seen my art btw

>>42446534
I incepted the idea of rebooting MLP into the Hasbro CEO's head. Respect your elders.

>>42446534
I am the atoms that made up faust when she was born and helped influence her creation of the show.

Kneel faggots and stand down.

>>42446540
Your art sucks faggot

>leaves for an hour and a half
>chaos
you do you, 4chan

>autistic argumentation detected
ABANDON THREAD

Well to be fair this is the most action i've seen in this thread in awhile.

Does hentai in RGREquestria feature squash soup chugging as a fetish? Because I want to feature in such hentai.

And now I wish to vomit.

>>42446639
Fuck it, I'm down for that too

as quickly as the autism started it ended.

>>42446978
I can always start up another retarded argument if you want

>>42446639
>>42446705
Imagine those hentai pics of women chugging big tankers of semen and then having a cum bubble blowing out of their nose, except instead it's a stallion/human man, and they chug a tanker full of squash soup and have a squash soup bubble coming out of their nose. I wanna be that guy.

>>42447014
Anon stop being a slut

>>42446450
God I love this pic. I'm usually a Lunafag but there's something about a deranged Celestia that gets me going like no other mare can

>>42446988
Yeah, it's super easy.
Observe.

>>42447125
I need one for luna

>>42447031
Please make me drink your squash soup out of a doggy bowl while you call me a good boy

>>42446639
>cum guzzling -> ???
It's not the same kind of stuff. Splash some stallion cum on a mare's junk and you get a foal. Splash some mare cum on a stallion's junk and you get a boner.
It needs to be the stuff of life. The RGRE version would be drowning the stallion in mare milk.

>>42447200
That's retarded, you're retarded, and it's about oral sex.

there is no such thing as a female orgasm

>>42447204
The clit doesn't exist either

>>42437926
not rgre enough, in fact not ngre at all

>>42447204
What about the femare orgasm?

>>42446525
You'd rather listen to squabbling nobles?

>>42447450
Celestia's better then me i'd have blow up both annoying stallions and nobles.

>>42447578
>annoying stallions
Buddy, you can just say stallions.
>laughingtrack.ogg

>>42446441
>/rgre/ part of foe
What rgre part? There's no rgre in foe. Pip remarks once that mares should rule the world. Meanwhile, stallions are ruling everything and raping mares left and right. Pip almost gets raped herself, and only doesn't because the guy thinks he'll get fleas in his sheath or whatever.
Wow mucho rgre, it's so reversed I can't even tell.

>Wow all your general's lore and setting would go GREAT in our shitbox universe!
Why're foeshits like this?

>>42448076
>Meanwhile, stallions are ruling everything and raping mares left and right.
S-shut up! T-that doesn't count!

>>42448076
>the only way they can defend their dogshit setting is if no one actually knows anything about it

>>42448076
>>42448090
>>42448125
>stallions are ruling everything
Yeah and look how that's turning out *badum tss*

>>42448169
...
...
...You mean rebuilding after the literal apocalypse that mares caused?

>>42447232
It's a trap.
Once she has you inside her and her steaming, muscular pussy clamps down on you with a python-like grip, she takes complete control.

>>42448207
most peaceful stallionist society - fillydelphia

>Anon is asked about dresses that he constantly wears
>all day, every day
>stallions can be very rather sensitive with how they look but this is just absurd
>not to mention that he's a janefilly in all other aspects of life
>he says something about "shame" and "the original sin"
>just what the hay is wrong with that alien colt?

>>42448227
Still better than dirty ass Baltimare

>>42448227
>>42448348
Oh look, the rats are fighting in the gutter.
t. Manehattan

>>42448366
Got nothin on Detrot

Pegasi only want one thing

>>42448860
Anon, wtb, this is a blue board

>>42448930
So?

>>42449359
MODS

>>42449381
They are powerless here

>>42448860
>ywn be preened by your mare

>>42450246
I'd love if she'd preen me, but every single time, without fail, every one of her "preening" sessions turns into a "grope and kiss" session.

>>42448207
It was the zebras and goddamn Goldenblood that stupid fucking colt

>>42447014

Phenomenally based.

FoE a shit.

Best mare, right here.

>>42450373
She smells bad

>>42450375

>mare smells like cheesecake and wet twat

Nigger, what?

>>42450380
She doesn't bathe. Colts shouldn't be interested in mares like that.

>>42450462
>Grrr, stupid colts!
>They should be interested in ME, not HER!

>>42450373
Things Anons say when attempting to provoke a MARE

>>42450635
Why be provoked by the trvth, when you could be better or at least not here?

>>42450635
Oh no, she's HOT

>>42450635
>this is the face of a qt patootie who would NOT have stopped the rape

>>42450635
"Those damn mares! I hate them!"
>Anon grumbles angrily, talking about how he'd totally stop a little mare from pinning him down and plapping him
>Unfortunately, this was said within earshot of a MARE who then set her sights on him

>>42450635
>FoE
Shit.

>>42450875
>>42450728
>>42450653
Samefag.

I never understood the desire to be raped by a mare.

Wouldn't you lads wanna hold your mare close after a hard day and tell her how much you love her and have nice calm consensual coitus?

I'd be sad if I got raped.

>>42450996
It's not that I don't want that stuff too.
The rape fantasy has a power because it's a signal of desire, which implies some value. Being so coveted that it puts the fundamental rules of civilization in question..it just feels good to imagine.

>>42451008
While that does make sense does it not also fall into a trap of while you are desired is the reason for your desire the person that you are or because of the appendage you hold?

>>42450967
bet you feel dumb now,

>>42451020
These fantasies of mine usually end in romance, to be honest. I like stuff where she feels bad to hurt me but the incentives are too profound not to take advantage. Stuff where I can also indulge in the degeneracy of being pitied and cherished.
That said you are on to a clear tension with the rapists-to-lovers fantasy, which is that getting from a to b is definitely not an easy trajectory to justify with any grace.

>>42451037
P...pretty...

>muh FoE
Enough.
Picrel (and the other female Pillars probably too) is likely HIGHLY pent up and thus would fuck a submissive and weak male (like 99.9% of nor/mlp/eople) about it, given the chance. Also pony Egypt (especially ancient pony Egypt) is conservative about the stallion rights.

I need a mare to give me rape correction for being such a bratty, catty, argumentative colt and being a little bitch online

>>42450996
I'd rather get MARED, which is a little different. It's like rape but with more snowpity involved.

>>42451191
She was already a bit hooves-y in her own time. I can only imagine how... forward she is in the modern era.
https://twibooru.org/posts/1606889

>>42451037
>bet you feel dumb now,
How much? I like free money.

>>42450890
Don't feel bad, harsh future breeds far more powerful and potent mares than you'll find in modern times. Even the most powerful Anons of this era can't hold their own against one of those high-level future mares.

>>42450996
Well I wouldn't actually want to be raped, because rape is intrinsically tied to non-consent, but being roughly dominated by a mare is nice.

MARED hentai often features faceless protagonists.

You used to be cool, you wanted to mare-carousel ALL over Equestria in the beginning, and now look at you; sweatpants, screen t's and you got foals to pick up from school
What happened to you, man.

>filter at work is gone for some reason
>can shitpost on the clock again
>mfw
my god i love the moonhoers

>>42451191
Now this I could get behind

Welp, that sure was a nice thread we had there until the FOE faggots invaded and started shitting it up with their crappy video game crossover.

>42452384
>I-it's not me. It's them. Them!
Why are you such a nigger Anon?

>>42428998 (OP)
She's not taking "no" for an answer.

>>42451037
Oh my goodness...

>>42452419
>t. nigger

>>42451037
I had a dream last night my stepmom tried to set me up with one of her coworkers, this would be the third time she's tried. It was Gin Rummy and she greeted me by just straight up magic-grabbing my crotch which scared me awake.

>>42452649
>this would be the third time she's tried
i-in the dream, right?

>>42452968
No, my mom has tried to set me up with her coworkers twice before.

>>42452649
>>42452968
>>42452976
Lonely samefag

>>42453018
>"Well, he was keeping the thread bumped so I wouldn't rape (You) again today."
>"But i came along and found the thread on Page 5 anyhow."
>So... drop your pants."

>>42453018
... But enough about you

>>42453252
>N-no you

>>42451811
I grew up.

>>42451811
Life.

>>42453997
That caulk gun wouldn't work. What would work is some sort of two part system that lets the mare depress a pedal with one hoof and apply the caulk with the other hoof. The two components would likely be connected via some sort of hydraulic.

>You hadn't expected that wish to actually come true
>Nor did you expect it to backfire like it did
>Driving home from a late night at work you saw a shooting star and asked for mares to be real
>Because it would be so awesome
>The next morning you were greeted by some older mare making herself at home in your living room and telling you to make some coffee
>The police, who were mares now, didn't do anything when you asked them to remove the intruder and instead laughed and told the older mare you needed discipline
>The news anchor was a mare, the construction crew working on the house down the street had been replaced by mares, even the horrible front page of youtube featured a couple familytuber vlogs where it was mares and their meek husbands
>Gin Rummy stared at you as you tried to process the world you just woke up to
>"Oh don't worry, I can show you how this world works." she says as her magic grasped you by the wrists and drug you to the ground, the older mare climbing on top of you

>>42446502
given that luna was talking in her royal canterlot voice at nightmare night, thinking it was traditionally normal, celestia must see this whole situation like the good old days

>>42446600
that they will

>>42451811
happiness

The only thing about sneedout feedquestria that interests me is a prompt about being kidnapped and snuggle-raped by a raider mare gang leader, only to get revenge by ruining her cred amongst her gang by forcefully bathing her in front of all of them.

>>42454530
>cut to black right before the bratty anon correction

>>42454907
the only good thing about poopout shitquestria is knowing there's a chance you can tame and fix a drugged out raider mare who would love to be your wife and bear your foals

/RGRE/ Campfire story
>Go to RGRE
>Finally, you get to live out your femdom fantasies
>All the mares are whiny maledom fetishists

I actually don't like femdom that much. I just like alternative social dynamics.

>>42455347
This, especially considering there's more mares and the two "god among men" also being mares, I like thinking on those kinda histories going around instead of just stallions being weaklings to be dominated

>>42455324
I like it because it's like 2010 all over again
>I post a cute mare
>A low-functioning autistic man online has a meltdown

>>42455513
Now I'm among those who are fine with a bit of FoE posting in /rgre/, but I'd like to remind you that when posting guest-content here you do have some obligation to stay in line with the thread and be respectful. I know angry faggot anon is an unserious guy, but there is also a point with foreign-content saturation and trolling for its own sake where /RGRE/ becomes /FoE/RGRE/ and I'd appreciate you not going out looking for where that boundary is. Angry faggot anon is for ignoring, and this thread should stay mostly canon oriented.

>>42455547
Thanks.
I'm sure that will help.

>>42455634
I'd like that MARE to push me to the ground and pin me

>>42455634
That's a TINY horn...
Do you guys think her attitude is compensating for something?

>>42455830
be nice its a cute horn and it's not that intimidating.

>>42455830
same can be said for FOEtrannies

>>42455324
I am repeatedly falling to my knees like the iconic gif of the angry video game nerd atm.
Truly we have become rgr
>"I can fix her" says the foolish wasteland human stallion

>>42455830
The robot legs are the pony equivalent of a dude driving a massive lifted pickup truck.

>>42455920
I realized this long ago, laughing at the women who think they can fix a serial killer but then I look at Blackjack and think that same shit

>>42455830
>tiny horn
>gets framemogged by wampage
>gets hornmogged by lacunae
What's it called when she's trying to have a turbo alpha mare personality?

>>42455925
To be fair, the robot legs were sort of necessary, considering the whole "magic cancer" deal...

(You) are now Prince of Equestria
Can you handle the constant influx of wedding proposals, 'fan mail', slutty looks from the guardsmares and general nationwide emasculation & condescension for your royal self?

>>42454530
>unicorn mare can just yank you to the ground

>>42456066
Yeah, most unicorns can do that.
A really good party trick is that the mare in >>42428998 (OP) can lift you off the ground by your dick using only her pussy.
She does her kegel excercises.

>>42455920
>>42455925
>>42455999
I would fix her, but honestly whatever's wrong with her is way hotter.

>>42456046
all I need is to know the art of not giving a fuck
should be easy

>>42456020
As a male it is my divine right to believe the most superficial explanation for a mare's every life choice and circumstance.

>>42455830
That actually looks pretty average sized, maybe a little on the bigger side, I dunno what you're on about teebeeaytch

>>42456142
>t. Mare pulling out an annotated and extremely in depth diagram of average horn lengths by country of origin

>>42456142
Cope and seethe, hornlet. No one's going to be impressed by your three inches.

>>42456154
Buck you, bitch, I'm at least 3.6 inches, everypony knows 3.5 is the hornlet cutoff

>>42456142
Why would you want to make a mare feel sad about her horn? Mares are so nice, we're not invisible to them, why would you want to hurt their feelings?

>>42456046
Can I date a guardsmare?

>>42456151
>https://calcsd.info/ but it's cornsd.info

SHES THE BIGGEST MARE
SHES THE BIGGEST MARE
SHES THE BIGGEST MARE

>>42456284
Luna and her lifesize

>>42456098
Holy shit bro, need big pony wife

>>42456046
I'm taking a small handful of personal guards and safaring to a distant land to make my own equestria with blackjack and hookers.

>>42456528
>Prince Anon's first royal act is to conquer new lands in the name of Equestria
He's got my vote

>>42456528
Where have I seen this before?

This is all human men are good for

>>42456528
>Foreign prince arrives on zebralands and flaunts off his wealth and foreign "guards"
>Female zebras too busy talking about his exotic body to tell him off
>Male zebras keep sending local cuisine that the prince keeps dumping out
>Somehow all of his acts of debauchery and rudeness are explained by him being foreign
>His mere presence somehow improves the overall quality of life for the region

>>42457062
>Anon lasts less than a week before being STRIPED by a tribe of zebra mares and taken as a breeding slave

Since we were talking about RGRE+other MLP fanfiction, might as well bring up baps.
What's their place in RGRE, what they're doing (besides eating mangoes)?

>>42457423
Canonically, batponyism is a disease. Do you have some other sort of batpony in mind? From where would they originate?

>>42457062
>Zebra mares last less than a week before prince Anon cock whips them into turning their tribal culture into an actual society

>>42457449
I like the headcanon that batponyism is a magic "disease", NMM was turning pegasi into bat ponies during her chimpout, which is how a new pony race was born.

>>42457423
I imagine they went into hiding for 1000 years, especially if you go the road of "batponyism disease"
at the time of the main show, slow reintegreation, and Equestria gets reminded of exactly HOW sexist they were a thousand years ago
all those posts about hyper-sexist, a millenia out of touch Luna? yeah, that, but every batpony, there are no male batpony guards because that's a mare's job, they're not even around as eye-candy like the modern guard

>>42457423
I just had them as a normal type of ponies in my story. Just slightly insular due to bad blood after siding with NMM. I was also gonna have moth ponies for another nocturnal pony type, but I ended up leaving that on the cutting room floor since I felt like it didnt really add anything

>>42446450
Molestia returns

>>42457423
My stories have them as an elite group of bodyguards Nightmare Moon made with magic and alchemy during her rebellion, a la Project Tamriel's Direnni canon. I didn't think about them beyond that so Luna just brought them back for whatever reason, tradition probably.

>>42457423
Their fangs make other ponies feel intimidated because they instinctually remind them of a predator. So bats are naturally good at security professions or being mob enforcers. Though it might seem strange at first thought, being nocturnal makes them ideal for the weather industry as well.

>>42428998 (OP)
any updates on The Long And Short Of It or are we going have to wait for another year and so on for a new chapter

>>42458691
Somehow, Molestia returned...

>>42458741
It's 95% done I just need to figure out a way to end this last scene. Since I skipped work today imma try to have it done by tonight.

>>42458741
Jk baby it's done NOW

>”You’ve got to hold him!”
>”I’m trying!”
>You, Anonymous, struggled in your living binds.
>How could this be happening to you!?
“Please don’t do this!”
>You begged, no, PLEADED with your captors.
>But it did you no good.
>The first pony who spoke, Nocturnal Pike, spoke once more, “Anon, this is for your own good.”
>You whipped your head around, trying to get a good look at the mare holding you from behind.
“Cut... please...”
>She turned away, unable to look you in the eyes.
>”I-I’m sorry, Anon. She’s right.”
>She was having doubts; that much was obvious.
>But you didn’t need doubts, you needed action!
>And if she wasn’t going to take action, you would!
>You thrashed in the earth mare’s grip...
>...but it wasn’t thrashing, was it? Not really.
>You were too weak. Too lethargic. Too nauseous.
>Not to mention the headache like you’d torn a muscle in your brain.
>Cut didn’t even have to wrestle you, frankly, she hardly had to /hold/ you!
>If she weren’t sitting behind you, with her underside pressed against your back, you probably wouldn’t even be able to keep yourself upright.
“Please...” you tried one last time. “Just one vegetable... A carrot, some broccoli, anything!”
>But your pleading fell on deaf ears.
>For Pike stood before you on the couch, balancing a slice of homemade triple chocolate cake on her wing.
>Your /third/ slice.
>Which was a whole two more than you think you can handle.
>”Anon, you NEED to get your sugar levels back up!” Pike pleaded with you. “That was a /massive/ magic surge! I promise you’ll feel better if you just eat this.”
>The comedown from your magic surge had been /hard/, harder than Pike and Cut had warned you it might be.
>In 30 minutes, you went from feeling like a magical god to the worst hangover of your life. Tequila Tuesdays back on Earth had nothing on this.
>Heck, by the time you’d stumbled home, you mares practically had to carry you back up to the apartment!
>And what, according to them, was the cure?
>Not a good night’s rest, no. It was force-feeding you cake.
“Come ooooooon,” you were whining like a child, but it was pretty much all you had the strength to do. “If this keeps up, I’m seriously gonna hurl!”
>You felt Cut’s hooves tighten around you.
>It probably wasn’t even intentional, just a flinch at the sound of hearing her stallion so upset.
>Unfortunately for you, it made escape from this decadent and delicious slice of hell much farther away.
>Pike rolled her eyes. ”No, you aren’t. Nopony in the history of equine-kind has ever thrown up from eating too much cake!”
“Bullshit.”
>It certainly /felt/ like bullshit.
>You don’t know where in God’s name Pike got her hooves on it, but it is RICH.
>Not the kind of thing you’d be eating ONE slice of after a hangover, much less three.

>>42459105
“Goddamn it!” You put every ounce of your strength into one last struggle. “I know you’re actually enjoying this! Let me go, you female Pierce Brosnans!”
>”He’s going delirious again! Cut, hold him steady!’
“I was a jo—”
>Your protest is cut off by Pike shoving a forkful into your mouth.
>Musting up even the energy to spit it out seems beyond you, so you relent.
>At least you’ll get the satisfaction of being right when you throw up all over them.
>Settling into your (admittedly comfortable) captivity, you grudgingly allow Pike to feed you forkful by forkful.
>With every bite, you tense in anticipation of your stomach turning on you.
>It's great, it really is, but it's SO much sugar.
>As a human, you always struggled with rich desserts, and you never really pressed it as a pony either.
>Most days, you’d only get halfway through /one/ slice of something like this before feeling like you needed to tap out.
>But you’ve already had /two/ and... you don’t feel any worse than when you started.
>No, no! This is NOT going to be another weird pony thing!
>You KNOW you ARE going to feel sick, any moment now.
>Just the idea of eating this much rich dessert brings back vivid memories of violent illness.
>Of being a kid and learning the hard way about why you can’t eat candy for every meal.
>Yet, they’re only memories. And despite everything you knew about yourself, they’re /staying/ memories.
>Because your body? All that’s telling you is...
>ITS DEEEEE~LISHIOUSSSS!
>GODDAMN YOU COULD EAT AN ENTIRE CHOCOLATE CAKE RIGHT NOW!
>THAT’S FUCKED!
>With a knowing smile, Pike holds the plate out for you, and you proceed to bury your face in it like a goddamn animal.
>In seconds, the plate is clean. Sparkling even.
>The change is almost immediate.
>The ache in your mind subsides, and your stomach even starts to /settle/.
>Surprisingly, Pike doesn’t take the chance to gloat, instead coming in close and looking right into your eyes.
>”Alright, phew, color’s coming back into his irises. I think we’re good, Cut.”
>Cut releases you with a similar sigh of relief.
>As she takes her weight off your back, you realize just how much you were relying on her to stay upright.
>Because while the other symptoms have faded, being dead tired has not.
>If anything, you might be MORE tired now, like a cartoon character coming off a sugar rush.
>Poor Cut thought you’d be able to stay up on your own, and pays the price for it.
>The world blurs as your weight drags you right back into her.
>Although, seeing as she was unprepared, it's more like right back ON to her.
>She barely gets a squeak out before being sandwiched between you and the couch.
>A fitting punishment for her part in all this.
“It's what you get. Feel the weight of your sins!”
>Your voice comes out drowsy and slurred. Jesus, what did you do to yourself?

>>42458844
>deleted
What happened, are you alright?

>>42458741
Sorry now it's actually done. Jumped the gun a little and forgot some minor errors I ironed out in the last pass.
>”You’ve got to hold him!”
>”I’m trying!”
>You, Anonymous, struggled in your living binds.
>How could this be happening to you!?
“Please don’t do this!”
>You begged, no, PLEADED with your captors.
>But it did you no good.
>The first pony who spoke, Nocturnal Pike, spoke once more, “Anon, this is for your own good.”
>You whipped your head around, trying to get a good look at the mare holding you from behind.
“Cut... please...”
>She turned away, unable to look you in the eyes.
>”I-I’m sorry, Anon. She’s right.”
>She was having doubts; that much was obvious.
>But you didn’t need doubts, you needed action!
>And if she wasn’t going to take action, you would!
>You thrashed in the earth mare’s grip...
>...but it wasn’t thrashing, was it? Not really.
>You were too weak. Too lethargic. Too nauseous.
>Not to mention the headache like you’d torn a muscle in your brain.
>Cut didn’t even have to wrestle you, frankly, she hardly had to /hold/ you!
>If she weren’t sitting behind you, with her underside pressed against your back, you probably wouldn’t even be able to keep yourself upright.
“Please...” you tried one last time. “Just one vegetable... A carrot, some broccoli, anything!”
>But your pleading fell on deaf ears.
>For Pike stood before you on the couch, balancing a slice of triple chocolate cake on her wing.
>Your /third/ slice.
>Which was a whole two more than you think you can handle.
>”Anon, you NEED to get your sugar levels back up!” Pike pleaded with you. “That was a /massive/ magic surge! I promise you’ll feel better if you just eat this.”
>The comedown from your magic surge had been /hard/, harder than Pike and Cut had warned you it might be.
>In 30 minutes, you went from feeling like a magical god to the worst hangover of your life. Tequila Tuesdays back on Earth had nothing on this.
>Heck, by the time you’d stumbled home, you mares practically had to carry you back up to the apartment!
>And what, according to them, was the cure?
>Not a good night’s rest, no. It was force-feeding you cake.
“Come ooooooon,” you were whining like a child, but it was pretty much all you had the strength to do. “If this keeps up, I’m seriously gonna hurl!”
>You felt Cut’s hooves tighten around you.
>It probably wasn’t even intentional, just a flinch at the sound of hearing her stallion so upset.

>>42459133
>Unfortunately for you, it made escape from this decadent and delicious slice of hell much farther away.
>Pike rolled her eyes. ”No, you aren’t. Nopony in the history of equine-kind has ever thrown up from eating too much cake!”
“Bullshit.”
>It certainly /felt/ like bullshit.
>You don’t know where in God’s name Pike got her hooves on it, but it is RICH.
>Not the kind of thing you’d be eating ONE slice of after a hangover, much less three.
“Goddamn it!” You put every ounce of your strength into one last struggle. “I know you’re actually enjoying this! Let me go, you female Pierce Brosnans!”
>”He’s going delirious again! Cut, hold him steady!’
“I was a jo—”
>Your protest is cut off by Pike shoving a forkful into your mouth.
>Musting up even the energy to spit it out seems beyond you, so you relent.
>At least you’ll get the satisfaction of being right when you throw up all over them.
>Settling into your (admittedly comfortable) captivity, you grudgingly allow Pike to feed you forkful by forkful.
>With every bite, you tense in anticipation of your stomach turning on you.
>It's great, it really is, but it's SO much sugar.
>As a human, you always struggled with rich desserts, and you never really pressed it as a pony either.
>Most days, you’d only get halfway through /one/ slice of something like this before feeling like you needed to tap out.
>But you’ve already had /two/ and... you don’t feel any worse than when you started.
>No, no! This is NOT going to be another weird pony thing!
>You KNOW you ARE going to feel sick, any moment now.
>Just the idea of eating this much rich dessert brings back vivid memories of violent illness.
>Of being a kid and learning the hard way about why you can’t eat candy for every meal.
>Yet, they’re only memories. And despite everything you knew about yourself, they’re /staying/ memories.
>Because your body? All that’s telling you is...
>ITS DEEEEE~LISHIOUSSSS!
>GODDAMN YOU COULD EAT AN ENTIRE CHOCOLATE CAKE RIGHT NOW!
>THAT’S FUCKED!
>With a knowing smile, Pike holds the plate out for you, and you proceed to bury your face in it like a goddamn animal.
>In seconds, the plate is clean. Sparkling even.
>The change is almost immediate.
>The ache in your mind subsides, and your stomach even starts to /settle/.
>Surprisingly, Pike doesn’t take the chance to gloat, instead coming in close and looking right into your eyes.
>”Alright, phew, color’s coming back into his irises. I think we’re good, Cut.”
>Cut releases you with a similar sigh of relief.
>As she takes her weight off your back, you realize just how much you were relying on her to stay upright.
>Because while the other symptoms have faded, being dead tired has not.
>If anything, you might be MORE tired now, like a cartoon character coming off a sugar rush.

>>42459139
>Poor Cut thought you’d be able to stay up on your own, and pays the price for it.
>The world blurs as your weight drags you right back into her.
>Although, seeing as she was unprepared, it's more like right back ON to her.
>She barely gets a squeak out before being sandwiched between you and the couch.
>A fitting punishment for her part in all this.
“It's what you get. Feel the weight of your sins!”
>Your voice comes out drowsy and slurred. Jesus, what did you do to yourself?
>Pike takes the opportunity to climb on top of your now exposed belly, lying down on you like some living pillow.
>”You had us worried there for a minute,” she said morosely.
>Limply, you throw one of your hooves over top of her, like a wacky waving inflatable arm-flailing tube man trying to give out a hug.
“Yeah, right, I saw how you were running that show.”
>Maybe it was the legitimate fear they’d died, or maybe it's the delirium, but you’re feeling sappier than usual.
“My fearless little guardsmare...”
>She blushes and looks away from you.
>Awwww, she’s so cute when she’s bashful.
>You could just pick her up and take her home!
>Oh wait, you did!
“Sorry, sorry, I meant compact!”
>You realize that throughout this brief interaction, Cut has been struggling and grunting beneath you.
>So you roll, just enough to expose her head back to the open air.
“And of course I can’t forget about my favorite comforter. Enjoying yourself down there?”
>She loudly gasps, and you’re sure that was 100% necessary, and NOT for comedic effect.
>”Anon... this isn’t what mares mean when they ask for a stallion to sit on them,” she says with a smile.
>You chuckle back, but yours is far more sinister.
>You’d been waiting for this moment.
“You mean like when /you/ asked me?”
>Her face turns bright red.
>”T-That didn’t happen!”
>Pike’s eyes light up as the memory comes back to her.
>”Oh yeeeeeeeah! I’m surprised you remembered. We were all pretty drunk...”
>”Uh, haha, I think I’d remember if I said something like that,” Cut said, growing less confident with every word.
>Adjusting yourself slightly, you realize that this position is genuinely comfortable.
>Sorry, Cut, but you can feel your eyelids getting heavy...
>Pike looks like she wants to say something, but that earlier bashfulness is keeping her lips shut.
>Or is it?
>”So... how was my baking?”
>Your eyes shoot back open.
>SHE baked that!? How? When?
>The shock staves off passing out for a moment longer.
“When did you manage that!?”
>She smiled triumphantly at you, ”Let’s just say a lot of those shopkeeps hawking their kitchen gizmos were VERY grateful that a certain guardsmare saved their wares from being trampled.”

>>42459144
>Then, far more bashfully, she added, “It’s my Dad’s old pick-me-up recipe. He slipped it into my bag when I went off to basic. He probably thought I’d get my coltfriend to make it for me someday, not the other way around...”
>You wouldn’t say she sounded sad, maybe just wistful?
“Well, your Dad’s got good taste. If I end up gaining fifty pounds, blame him.”
>She laughed, saying something about “colts and their weight,” under her breath.
>”I-I wouldn’t worry about that after today,” Cut said. “You’ll be lucky not to lose weight considering how much lifting you were doing.” Then quietly, almost inaudibly, she added, “That was so cool.”
>The small boost you'd gotten is fading just as quickly, and once again, your eyelids start growing heavy.
“I doubt the ponies of Canterlot would see it that way.”
>With that last thought, you drift away.


>You awoke to a bed with one less pony than normal in it.
>It was immediately obvious who, seeing as he was the largest of the three of you.
>Stretching your wings, you allowed yourself a little grumble.
>You and Cut had worked your flanks off dragging him into bed last night, the /least/ he could have done was stay in and cuddle.
>/Tack tack, tack tack, tack tack/
>Your ears clue you in to what’s got Anon up so early, and you roll yourself out of bed to take a gander.
>As expected, he’s set up in the living room at his typewriter, clacking away.
>He’s sitting upright on the couch as he types, a weird habit he said he kept from being a human.
>He’s so focused, he doesn’t even notice you walk in!
>...you could do something really funny here.
>Launching yourself forward, you slam a landing on the back of the couch, right next to his shoulder.
“Whatcha writin’?”
>He nearly jumps out of his skin.
>”AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH JESUS Pike! Don’t sneak up on me like that!”
>An equally loud cry followed from the other room soon after, but this was a very different kind of cry.
>This was a war cry.
>”False alarm, babe, go back to bed.” Then, addressing you as much as Cut, he added, “Pike just wanted to jumpscare me.”
>The shout quickly faded back into soft snoring, and you beamed internally at how far your herdmate had come.
>That was truly dauntless! A warcry worthy of a warrior!
>”If you must know,” Anon said, doing his best Blueblood impression.”I had a bit of a revelation last night: my reputation in this town is probably /fucked/.”
>You, like any mare would, quickly move to soothe your stallion's fears— but honestly? He’s probably right.
“Is this about yesterday?”
>”A little. And the nightmare I had last night, where the ponies of Canterlot decided they finally had enough of me and ran me out of town with torches and pitchforks.”
“Pffft, they wouldn’t do that!”
>He gave you a look as if to say, “Wouldn’t they?”
>And when you thought about it, yeah, they probably would.
“So how’s this meant to help then?”
>”Check it out!” he says, moving to the side to give you a viewing window.

>>42459149
>The headline on the page sticks out to you immediately, “HERO STALLION HELPS SUPPRESS RIOT!”
>Although “HERO” has been crossed out with a pen, words like altruistic, mysterious, and helpful have been written around it.
>”I figured 'hero' was a little too self-indulgent.”
>You nod sagely and continue reading.
>The rest more or less follows what you’d expect from the title: Anon trying to put a spin on what happened in the market.
>It's not like it's a /bad/ spin, his surge DID end up contributing quite a bit to the efforts to quell the riot.
>It’s just...
“I don’t know about this one, Anon.”
>”Whaaaaat? Noooo. I’m just doing what journalists do best! Besides, is anything in there a lie?”
>You suppose not. But nonetheless...
“Doesn’t this still seem kind of unethical?”
>Posture sagging and sighing, he says, “Yeah, it does. Look, I just need a win here, especially with Jargon going on about how I ‘haven't written in a year’. Ridiculous.”
“Why not just write about the stampede then? I mean, you were /there/.”
>He laughed; it was a hollow imitation of the sound you loved.
>You hated that.
>”She’d never print it. The honor of covering a story like that will get passed up to a more 'experienced reporter',” the derision he put into that was palpable. “I’ll be lucky to consult, maybe put in a quote or two.”
>That was... /shockingly/ resigned of him.
>Not once in the time that you’ve known him has he been willing to take something like that lying down.
“Why not just write it anyway? Stick it to her?”
>He shrugs.
>”To what end? I’ve pushed enough boundaries by now to know when I can’t. It’d just end up in her trash, a total waste of time.”
>”I don’t think it’d be a waste.”
>You’re surprised to hear Cut chiming in from behind you; you’d figured she’d be out like a light!
>”I... I could publish it,” she continues, blushing slightly, like she couldn’t believe she had said that.
>”What like— IN the Canterlot Canterer? How would you get it past Jargon?”
>”Auntie Jargon leaves pretty much all the actual editing to me. It’d be easy to slip it into the final print copy; she wouldn’t even notice until it was on the shelf.”
>The more she spoke, the more the bashfulness disappeared.
>It was like she was talking herself into it. Like the more she said aloud, the more feasible it became.
>”But Jargon wouldn’t just let that /slide/!” said Anon. “You’d get fired or... /something/! Either way, I can’t ask you to do that.”
>”Yeah, you can,” now she spoke boldly. “Jargon can’t fire me, she NEEDS me. And Dad would never talk to her again.”
>She pointed a decisive hoof at his typewriter.
>”Now YOU get writing and I’ll make sure it gets in.”
>You and Anon had to pick your jaws off the floor.
>The Cut of days of old would NEVER have suggested that.
>Look how far she’s come, your marely protege!
>Almost brings a tear to your eye.
>”Well, yes ma’am!” Anon says with a renewed vigor.

>>42459156
>Without a moment’s hesitation, he shreds the draft he had, casting those words into the ether.
>Only to immediately begin again on this new draft.
>Such is the way of writing, she supposed.
>Surely, she thought, this couldn’t go wrong.


>”Behind MY back? Really? Of all the clit brained schemes!”
>The voice makes you wince, like you’re a little filly again.
“B-But Auntie Jargon,” you try to say. “Anon was a primary source! It made the most sense for him to cover the stam—”
>In hindsight, you really should have seen this coming.
>Her booming voice fills the office, smothering any excuses you could muster.
>”And I gave him a very important /piece/ of the story to cover. Didn’t I, Anonymous?”
>Anon, standing beside you as always, looks legitimately stupefied.
>”You call tracking the resulting popularity of self-cleaning pans IMPORTANT?”
>”Yes,” Jargon replied without missing a beat. “Our readers need to know what got their stallions so riled up in the first place. /And/ if the threat is still out there!”
>Anon’s reply is little more than a series of angry and confused noises, but Jargon doesn’t even give him the chance to collect those thoughts.
>”But what do I see on the front page of my own paper? An article whose publishing I did NOT authorize!”
>You’re floundering here.
>”Really, Cut, aren’t you too old to be pulling stunts like this for some dick? I’d have thought Barely raised you better.”
“I-It wasn’t...” you stammer, unable to finish the thought. “You didn’t have a problem with the draft when you thought Yellow Journalism wrote it!”
>”That’s not the point! We have seniority here, a hierarchy. A hierarchy /you’re/ expected to follow, even if you’re banging our stallions’ news correspondent.”
>It was an obvious dodge, but even then, you couldn’t think of a counterargument.
>She was right.
>But before you could express as much, a strange sound came from your side.
>A violently strangled expression of anger.
>”Stop talking to her like she’s FIVE. And I’m right here too, I wrote the damn thing! Don’t you have anything to say to me!?”
>Much to your shock and horror, Jargon sighs.
>”No, Anonymous, I don’t. Because, frankly, I blame myself for this.”
>All your coat stands on end.
>Years of working with your Aunt warns you exactly where this is going.
>This is gonna be /bad/.
>”Giving you all those special projects clearly put some ideas in your head, set some unrealistic expectations. I should have known it’d be too much for your whimsical temperament.”
>Oh Celestia Anon might actually have an aneurysm.
>”Don’t worry, from here on out I’ll be setting some serious ground rules.”
>”You’ll WHAT—”
>”And /you/ missy,” Jargon doesn’t even acknowledge Anon spoke. Her attention is solely on you. “I think a more serious punishment is in order. Perhaps some time back as a junior editor, will remind you how things work around here.”
>J-Junior editor?

>>42459161
>Working /under/ Printed Press and Guten Berg?
>They HATE you, especially since you “stole” the office eye candy from them!
>She can’t be serious, can she? She /knows/ how this will go!
>But all too suddenly, that’s not your biggest problem.
>You know Anon’s opinion of your aunt has never really been that high, but he’s always kept it to himself.
>This seems to be the final straw.
>That mask is slipping.
>”HEY! You can’t do that to her! All the goddamn work she does for y—”
>You need to stop him, NOW.
>Before he makes this any worse for himself or you.
>Thankfully, he hesitates when you wrap your foreleg around his.
“It's alright A-Anon,” you quickly stammer out. “I-I deserve this.”
>”Like hell you do!” he says, flabbergasted. “You think I’m just gonna stand here and /Jargon/ do this to you without giving her a piece of my mind?”
>Jargon smirks, and your heart sinks.
>”The only piece of your mind I’m interested in, /colt/, is your thoughts on this year’s winter collection. And since you seem so gung-ho to write, I think I want that piece on my desk by the end of this week.”
>That was it, the straw that broke the camel’s back.
>It's easy to forget, but as a truly inequine snarl parts his lips, you remember that deep down Anon still isn’t really a pony.
>”/You/—”
>But by the grace of Celestia, his expression changes.
>Just before he could say anything he’d regret, it softens.
>”Actually, you’re right, Cut. This isn’t worth it.”
>Without another word, he leaves, dropping the two of you into silence.
>You assumed that for your aunt, it would be a triumphant silence.
>A moment for her to bask in the petty office victories she so loved.
>But that triumph, that confidence in her authority, feels a little hollower than it normally would.
>You can see something reflected in her eyes.
>An uncertainty.
>Like she saw something she truly didn’t expect, and it shook her ever so slightly.
>Then the feeling passes, and something new takes its place: the realization she’d just been yelling at you and your coltfriend for fifteen minutes.
>”Tell your dad about this and you’re fired,” she says.
>Deciding that’s fine with you, you leave to follow Anon.
>By the time you catch up with him, he’s already back at his desk.
>He’s started typing away at something, but you doubt it's a review of this year’s winter fashion catalogue.
>He’s muttering to himself too, things like, “GAVE me? I clawed those stories out of the dumb bullshit you put me on.”
>You’re starting to get very worried now.
“Anon?”
>He doesn’t notice you; he’s still talking to himself.
>”You think I’m gonna stick to your stupid fluff pieces? Don’t make me laugh…”
>You try again.
“Anon, what are you doing?”
>He stops, turning to you with an evil look in his eye.
>”Why, I’m giving /Jargon/ the story of the century: I’m gonna clear Wind Rider’s name.”

>>42459173
And that's all for today! I wanted this out sooner, but this one took a little iterating. If I've managed to trap anyone new in my spider's web, you can start reading from here https://ponepaste.org/158

>>42459184
Thanks SQA-anon, it's glad to see you're back in action in writing!

>>42459192
You're very welcome! And it's good to be back

>writefag post
what a great day!

>>42459526
Every day is a gift when there's green to read

>>42459184
Didn't read.

>42460097
Go back to red-dit.

>>42460097
Your loss, nigger.

Careful now, don't make Cut do something she'd regret. Such as portraying you as the sóyjill and herself as the giga-trixie...

Stallions should wear nothing at all

>>42460612
Anon, we're ponies. We all wear nothing at all.

>>42460624

>Ponies usually don't wear nothing except the ocasional bow or ribbon for cosmetic purposes.
>Suits, dresses and saddles are usually reserved for important and luxurious events, some more private and lewd acts or both.
>This is the reason behind the "socks=lewd" and the reason why they play "reverse strip poker"

>Tfw because of Anon always wearing his characteristic suit the ponies either asume he is a Sloot, a stuck up member of his world's nobility, or a Stuck up sloot member of his world's nobility.

>Mare either try to hit on him because they asume he is too easy or shy away because they asume he is way too out of their league, no in between.

>>42460624
>https://youtu.be/EvHgaV5GFBM

>>42459184
It's shit.

>all this hostility
>>42459184
well I can't say I'm surprised that our writefags disappear, but I hope you don't and that you know the bulk of us appreciate your work

>>42461244
The hostility is from offboarder trolls, anyone should ignore them.

>>42461255
It's probably the same loser who shilled cucker (because he hates this board and wants to destroy it) and calls everyone saying "she fucks human men" a shitskin.

>>42459184
Jeez I need to catch up on this story

>>42460267
>sóyjill
wojak is Polish voyak and means "war guy"
I don't know any Slavic feminine alternative

>>42461304
>because he hates this board and wants to destroy it
anon, /cumg/niggers want all boards destroyed

>>42461244
>Waves old man cane around
Back in MY day, trolls used to put EFFORT into shitting on stories. If these whipper-snappers want to impress me, they'd better try putting a better foot forward than that!

test

Are there night stalkers in FoE?

>>42461905
Based on the fifteen or so chapters I read across all those stories before I got bored of them, imma say no.

>>42436073
One day our brave chief will bring The Chuddler to justice

>>42436073
One day our brave chief will bring Jane The Cuddler to justice

>>42462793
>"Stormtrooper."

>>42462393
Berry, get your own stallion.
This one's claimed.

>>42462819
Berry Punch will win this fight easily.

>>42462866
>no way she'd lose
>heh, see, she can beat up a defenseless colt
hang berry punch in the town square at sundown

>>42463025
>at sundown
Why wait? Celestia should get to witness the extermination of a coltbeater

>>42462866
Berry would end up like that dude who punched snookie on Jersey shore

>>42463035
>>42463025
>"He had it coming."
>"A colt should know his place."

>>42430049
You say you're willing, but you'll change your tune when you feel your pelvis fracture under her relentless onslaught

I miss Sunburst

>>42459173
I forgot, has he learned that Wind Rider is full of crap yet? Is he intentionally going to write a horribly bad story?
Also, I'd just quit by that point, seriously.

>>42463186
can't believe he's gone to get milk and never returned, I weep very much.

>>42463248
I thought he went to get ciggies because he knows Starlight gets grossed out by them and thus wouldn't rape a smoker

>>42462866
I thought Berry was going to beat up Cloudy there, not Anon
Why would she beat Cloudy Cloud Colt Cuddle bug?

>>42463245
His knowlage of the affair is limited to passing knowlage and bias takes from Blueblood's friends. Takes he hadn't put much stock in, until his own encounter with the Wonderbolts at least...

>>42463330
She's drunk.

>>42463406
>*hic*
>"I'm not drunk."
>"YOU'RE drunk."

>>42462866
Women make shit like this and then complain dudes don't pay attention to them at bars anymore

>>42463505
Honestly, I don't even go to bars because drunk women annoy me.

>>42463515
I never understood bar culture you go there to get wasted and maybe meet someone? If your there for a drink then great but the drinks are really expensive. If your trying to meet someone shouldn't you be sober and sound of mind and body before you meet someone?

This is me btw.

>>42463675

That's because you are not there to meet people, you are there to fuck people.

>Go to bar
>Get drunk so your perceptions of beauty and sexyness go down along with your standards
>See someone you consider "attractive" in this altered state
>Have a one night stand and gtfo before dawn breaks.

That is unless you are a woman because in that case you can also get free drinks by making fags that are interested in you pay for it.
This comes with the risk of one of them sneaking a little something in one of the glasses but I guess worse things have been done in the name of free booze.

>>42463829
This is how "coyote dates" happen.

>>42463675
And people wonder why birthrates are falling.

>>42463451
No you're Grape. I'm Anon.

>>42462819
damn she looks good at a bar
I'd let her walk all over me

>>42462819
>>42463451
Bros, I'm drooling right here. Which mare I should offer my cock to?

>>42464837
yourself because you're a faggot

>>42464837
fuck off tourist

>>42464841
>>42465002
Okay, bend over, you two. >:)

>>42456046
The Prince of Whoring to contrast Cantdance as th Princess of Love

>>42428998 (OP)
>question
I would kill it. If any animal decided to attack my honor and health, I would kill it without hesitation, becous they are not humans. They may talk like us, act like us, and even feel like us, but that does not change the fact that they are not my species, which means I will not feel any remorse if it begins to pose a threat to me, and I will especially not hesitate if it is an act of revenge.

It also does not matter what size it is, the bullet does not care how much meat it penetrates.

>>42465432
>How bro felt after writing that

>>42465435
Someone who gave up his human pride to become a slave to animals is trying to insult me? This is the funniest joke I've heard this year.

>>42465438
Fucking kek.

>>42465443
>human pride
Lmao, h00mans can only jew lesser h00mans. Human pride my ass, not even your own species like you and only think of you as someone who could provide $$$$$$ for the comfort of their own ass and threw you out like a used condom once you've outlived your usefulness.

>>42465443
lmaooo you've got to be trolling

>>42465467
>>42465475
You were created in the image and likeness of God to bring his gracious word to the world. You were born according to his plan to continue your lineage and raise worthy sons, but you betrayed all that is good, and for what?

Repent before the true God, for he is our savior and our master, and it is to him that we must give thanks every day for the opportunity to behold the universe that he created for us!

>>42465438
Damn you were right on the money

>>42465432
Toonforce, the bullet would only give her an owie, and then she'd rape you again, with feeling this time.

>>42465498
religioncels are so retarded

>>42454530
>Gin Rummy
ANON GET OUT OF THERE

>>42465498
So God made h00mans to treat each other like garbage, got it.
You're retarded and gay, no wonder not even the janny likes you post.

>>42465813
OOO EEE AAA OO O EEE AA REEEE!
*throws shit at neet mare*
OOO EEE AAAAAA

>>42465824
It's not like you can make her smell any worse

>>42465813
That's what this website is for, so they don't spread that cancer in the real world.

>>42465731
She's already inside the house
It's too late for him

>https://derpibooru.org/images/3220418
(page 8 bump)

>>42428998 (OP)
Imagine her licking your face.
And then your chest.
And then your belly.
You know what's next.

>>42445244
Yes.

>>42445272
That's not the same.

Are there any greens involving anon as a DILF? I feel like some funny dynamics could come from an anon that has already settled in Equestria with his own herd and daughters but is still unable to catch a break from young mares

>>42467586
No.
Anon’s motto is, “Live fast, die young, leave a beautiful corpse.”

>>42467634
That was his motto until he got rape corrected into a househusband

These neet mares could easily get a stallion like me if they spent more time taking a shower instead of hanging at comic shops.

>>42467218
My homemade cooking?

>>42467586
there's a >fic about Anon Junior

>>42467997
What's the name?

Anon. Y. Mous was raped by a pack of mares in the sizzling hot summer of 1002.

>>42469004
First of many
>P10
shoo!

>>42468663
the detail on this piece of work is impressive
though I now imagine some kinky mare using sauce and spices to enhance the taste on the tongue or something

>>42456098
>fear
>but also arousal

ooh, so close sweetie, but not yet

>>42459133
is this the full green? or is there another part somewhere because id like to read it in full

>>42463112
>you'll change your tune when you feel your pelvis fracture
is that not the goal?

>>42470225
https://ponepaste.org/158

>>42470233
>pic related
I looked for it but I can't find the video. Where's the pony asmr video?

>>42470236
awesome! thanks
>>42470243
have you checked ponetube?

don't forget to snuggle into your mare at night, she'll protect you from the scary monsters in the dark

Foalmaking sex with Red Woods.

>>42471354
We tried posting that before but the janny deleted it.

That ain't even no lil pony ahh

>>42471659
More like
>That ain't even no little pony, AHHHHHHHHHHHH

>"There! I told ye that none of ye were a match for me."
>"Even all at once, you couldn't defeat me."
>"Now as my prize I claim this wee green fella in the dapper threads."
>"Let's go somewhere more private."

>>42472287
>>42472419
Would Nordpone be a true daughter of Shor and fight for the Cyrodiilic emperor or for Ulfric Not-A-Thalmor-Puppet Stormcloak?

>>42472450
Elder Scrolls is for fags, reframe this in Game of Thrones context

>>42472450
>>42472465
>"Are ye alright, Anon?"
>"Do ye have brain damage?"

>>42472465
>game of thrones

>>42472465
Would Nordpone fight for the King of the North or for the right to suck on the Queen of the Vale's crotchtits even though she's too old for it?

>>42472502
>"Och, ye DO have brain damage!"
>"Hold still, I'll fix it for ye!"

>>42472539
>"Why do you disturb me, Nord?"
>"I'm surprised you can even speak. You look like a primitive."
>"Foul beast! Away with you!"
>*SWING, miss.* *SWING, miss.* *SWING, miss.*
>"AUURGH!"

>>42459184
Is bobbles taking his time adding the latest chapter onto fimfic?

>>42472583
Yep, he had a busy week but he's still workin on it

Off 8, in case they fix whatever wrong soon.

Bed-breaking, foal-making sex with Nordpone.

>>42474038
>Bed-breaking
>with Nordpone
So gentle sex?

THE MARES ARE GETTING TOO BIG

>>42474305
Just shrink the mares?

>>42474326
>He wants less mare
FAGGOT

>>42474391
consider the following: some want mare of more manageable size. Mare can be too big. When big mare, love for mare is spread out, resulting in decreased density of love for mare.
Plus, it's a mare, so gayccusations invalid

>>42472287
What was that one green about anon being rescued by nordpone from bandits?

>>42474391
>he doesn't want a bossy little fairy sized mare
very gay tbqhwyf

>>42470233
>picrel isn't real
This time I'm really gonna do it

>>42474442
Clandestine Arrangements by Uh-Hmmm
https://ponepaste.org/5426

>>42474484
>https://ponepaste.org/5426
This thread would die without you Mr. Skeltal, may you get 2 sexist mares for this

>>42474305
No stopping now. We must go bigger.

>>42475336
>"I am monkeybread!"

>>42475339

"Hey! Goddammit hugehorse, quit using my house for a footrest! I just fixed the fucking roof last week!"
>"Huh? Is someone talking to me? I can barely hear your dinky little voice there, Anon."
>She shifts her stance a bit to get more leverage against the stubborn stocking, giving you a show you really didn't need first thing in the morning.
>You blush and avert your eyes, taking a deep draught of your coffee for strength.
"Why the hell do you always have to use MY house for shit like this? Can't you go fuck up someone else's place?"
>"Nah. I like it here."
>She finishes pulling on her stockings and rolls up to her hooves.
>She sticks her face right into your personal space, such that you fear for being accidentally eaten.
>"You always make such funny noises when I come here. You're a riot, Anon!"
>She spreads her wings and lifts off, the downdraft blowing you twenty feet into the mud.
>"Later Anon!" she calls over her shoulder as she flies away.
/Fuck this place./
>You get to your feet and brush some of the mud off yourself.
/Seriously, fuck this fucking place./
>You go back inside to clean up the bits of roof that fell into your house,
/Fucking humongous horses./

What if force that pulled Anon from Earth also pulled somepony from normal Equestria into RGRE?
>how would they react to RGR, herds and weird fixation on socks?
>would they remain unnoticed by Twiggy?
>would they bond with Anon over a common interdimensional cultural shock?

>>42474442
You'd think Celestia would deal with the bandits after so many years. Makes you think.

>>42475872
>he expects politicians to be competent at their job
ngmi

>>42475501
that actually sounds like it'd be pretty neat if there was also no anon in it and it was just about horse

Why dis bihs leg so big?

>>42476426
The animators felt the need to make them that way to try and compensate for her 3 incher. What they didn't realize is that small marecocks are actually much hotter than big ones, so no compensation was actually needed.

>>42476426
What is this, a Pillar Mare?
Kars-looking hair

>>42476524
arise my mistress!

>>42476426
My toothpick can fix her

>>42476541
SLAMMU

Pity about the resolution, though.

>>42477280
I get mares using this line on me at least once a week. Why do they all think it'll work?

>>42477352
that's probably my fault, I always tell them it was the pick-up line that got me to eat them out

>>42475457
>crush crush destroy hahah cunt
Why do people like this

>>42462393
I'm new.
Do you want to help me "cum here often", you cutie patootie?

>>42478398
>Not Crush Kill Destroy Swag
EPIC fail

A filly who'll beat up all the mean fillies who tease you in grade school

A filly who'll beat up all the other fillies but still tease you

A filly who'll simply notice you and subsequently care for you

>>42472465
call it a song of ice and fire.

>>42455329
But I want to dominate them.

>>42455329
>And when Anonymous woke up.....all the PONIES WERE HUMAN!!!
>OoOioOoHHHHh!!!

>>42447014
oh fuck

I just want a big mare to sit on my face and hose it down with her mare cum until my skin is permanently infused with the stink.

>>42479882
>t. marecel larping as a stallion online and projecting her DISGUSTING, MISANDRIST sexual fantasies

>>42476426
what a powerful physique

>>42479888
Name one thing wrong with hating stallions

Gimme that sweaty nerd pussy.

>>42480126
The fact you can never do it enough

Getting roofied by a sad, lonely, desperate NEET mare only to turn the tables and rape HER.

>>42480790
Good art.

>>42480790
This is why I lift

This is why I fart.

>>42467218
She swallows you whole?

>>42482573
nothing you can do about that if she does that, hope I taste good at least

>>42482539
...May I have sniff to inspect your fart's quality?

DEAD THREAD
KILLED BY BRAPFAG
MAY IT NEVER RISE AGAIN

And so the mares who wishes for a stallion to fart on their face trot to their homes to get a much needed sleep for they have to work at their jobs, putting hay fries into the bag.

Given the choice to be a house husband but only for one race of pony which are you choosing?

>>42483276
Earth pony. Most fertile.

>>42483312
>>42483312
>>42483312